waltzwithwillywonka - Tumblr blog

[waltzwithwillywonka]

this tweet genre is so fucking funny i need more of them

[waltzwithwillywonka]

so did anyone else know that its very difficult to judge how much cleavage you're showing at any given time because of how boobs slope downwards

[waltzwithwillywonka]

Another dream comic. Had a dream where I was tied to a chair in a dark room and some hooded figures killed me after I begged for my life—but then I got caught in a time loop and so I kept trying to figure out what I could say to get them to not shoot me but they killed me no matter what I said. Started just shouting random stuff eventually.

[waltzwithwillywonka]

[waltzwithwillywonka]

[waltzwithwillywonka]

[waltzwithwillywonka]

[waltzwithwillywonka]

Things that work in fiction but not real life

torture getting reliable information out of people

knocking someone out to harmlessly incapacitate them for like an hour

jumping into water from staggering heights and surviving the fall completely intact

calling the police to deescalate a situation

rafting your way off a desert island

correctly profiling total strangers based on vibes

effectively operating every computer by typing and nothing else

ripping an IV out of your arm without consequences

heterosexual cowboy

[waltzwithwillywonka]

[waltzwithwillywonka]

After all these years, it finally happened

It happened

I had a dream I was a worm

I was a worm in a relationship with a human man

He still loved me even though I was a worm

The question has been answered

[waltzwithwillywonka]

farardenessentials on tiktok | source

[waltzwithwillywonka]

[waltzwithwillywonka]

youre an olympic level hater. i respect it.

they asked me to represent my country in the sport of hating i said no. i hate my country

[waltzwithwillywonka]

[waltzwithwillywonka]

A pike jumped out of the water likely chasing prey and got stuck in a branch and died. Now, a bird has made a nest in its mouth. One of the most interesting things I’ve seen.

[waltzwithwillywonka]

I know this is horrible but this comment was left on a true crime youtube video and I cannot stop laughing.