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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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A guy just came to my house while I was home alone to ask if I was single why are men like this

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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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A guy just came to my house while I was home alone to ask if I was single why are men like this

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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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This is what plays in my head every minute of every day.

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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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When Geralt sees Jaskier again, it is nearly 20 years after their confrontation.

Every time Geralt had meant to go find the bard, something stood in his way: the war, a contract, keeping Ciri safe...

Guilt.

After so much time had passed, Geralt knew that whatever he might have to say, whatever he might have done to solve this rift between them would be meaningless.

Jaskier would be in his 60s, hopefully enjoying a comfortable retirement in Oxenfurt.

Instead, they meet in a small town bookshop.

Jaskier has glasses perched on his nose, the latest style of clothing on his back, and a leather bound book open in his nimble hands. His face, unchanged.

For a moment, they just stand on opposite ends of the room staring at one another.

Geralt didn't have the words then, even in his mind's eye, what a proper apology might sound like. At least with Yennefer she could read his mind and his intentions-- and even then the only reason she forgave him was for Ciri's sake.

20 years later, and there are no words or magic mind reading to get him through this.

And so he takes that moment, standing in front of Jaskier to try and formulate something. What he comes up with is: "How?"

Jaskier snorts and rolls his eyes. "That would be your concern, wouldn't it."

Not a question, a statement. Geralt winces. Time seems to have done little to soothe the pain of their last encounter. "I meant..."

"I know what you meant, Geralt." Jaskier closes the book in his hands and slides it back onto the shelf in front of him. "But I'm afraid it's none of your fucking business. Not anymore." And he turns to walk away, so readily leaving Geralt and their friendship where it likely belongs-- in the past.

The only exit, fortunately enough, is behind Geralt. It is not at all difficult to stop Jaskier in his tracks. A simple step to the left. "Can we talk?"

He's met with a sigh. Oddly, it gives him hope, as the expression is a full bodied thing. Jaskier's shoulders move up and down, he tilts his head from one side to the other, and then he crosses his arms. "I want wine. Expensive wine. And! I do not promise to be agreeable."

This is enough.

-

Jaskier downs two glasses of Est Est before he's willing to talk. At some point over the years, he's grown something of a tolerance.

"Alright then. Ask."

"Why haven't you aged?"

Jaskier stares down into his wine, watching the red foamy bubbles gather at the bottom of the cup. "A witch tied my life to yours."

Horror was never something Geralt truly understood until recently. When Ciri's life was in danger, the look of betrayal on Yennefer's face, and now this. "What?"

"You really need your hand to be held?" Jaskier shakes his head. "A witch knew you. Wanted to find you. Don't know why, I was never told. It wasn't important what I knew." His finger traces the rim of the glass, a clear but quiet note sings. "She wanted to find you and thought that she'd be able to do so through me. The joke is on her now, of course. Or was."

Years ago, Geralt envied the fluid way Jaskier moved. The eased and relaxed way he'd move his hands to describe something, or how he always seemed to be comfortable.

Now, there is tension in his shoulders.

Geralt wants to smooth it away, but his hands are not made to be gentle. Raising Ciri has taught him a lot, yes. This is different. Jaskier is different. "You are alive... because I am alive."

"Yes."

"...Then..."

"It stands to reason that I will die upon your death." A bitter laugh escapes Jaskier. He grips the bottle of Est Est and pours himself another glass. "It does make life more thrilling, I suppose. Unpredictable. Though, it should be said, I wasn't entirely careful with how I lived before. It was my choice, however."

Oh.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't. In that, you are innocent."

"I'll..." He clears his throat. "I won't take any contracts."

Jaskier smiles. "Liar. You couldn't stop inserting yourself into dangerous situations if you tried."

"Then tell me what I can do to fix this."

And again, Jaskier laughs. He finishes off a third glass of wine, wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, and stands. "You can't."

This time, when Jaskier leaves, Geralt doesn't stop him.

Jaskier should be able to make his own choices, after all.

#ow

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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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BarOwner!Lambert Woodworker!Eskel Meet-cute Romcom

Alternate Title: Lambert is a horny bastard. Eskel notices.

So this idea came from the last flash fic challenge prompt (that I only got like three paragraphs into) which was a picture of a cute kitten. But my mind refuses to write it in full so I ended up writing it chat-fic style on discord last night and thought I’d share it here too.

So what if...

Lambert owns a fancy ass bar/tapas place, which he takes very. seriously.

His cocktails are stupidly complex and yet perfectly balanced, if it's out of season do not bring it in his house - he will fire you on the spot

His bar is in a kind of out of the way spot but its reputation has now grown word of mouth, it's a small place so there's often a waitlist to get in on busy nights

Eskel, meanwhile, has just babysat Ciri for a weekend (Geralt and Eskel are brothers in this and Lambert is not - for fucking purposes)

She is six.

He loves her very much.

She also talks. A lot. Almost as much as Jaskier. Probably because of Jaskier. She has a sweet tooth. She wants to know everything. It is Monday morning and he just left and fucking shit how do people have kids he is tired

He also needs a drink.

So he stumbles out of Geralt's place and into the first bar he sees, like the not-alcoholic he is

(one guess whose bar that is)

MEANWHILE...

Lambert, the obsessive bastard that he is, has been at the bar since 7am

He is on very #37 of a juniper cocktail

It is. So close. But not right.

He finally figured out which bitters work best, and vodka with a corn base seems to be mixing better than the potato base, but it's...not right...

The bar is a mess, bottles everywhere, many many made and abandoned juniper cocktails scattered around him

(they all taste great to anyone who is not Lambert, for reference)

But he's buried in his notes and has almost figured it out when he hears someone call out, "Are you open?"

...which...how dare they. He was concentrating. Was that not clear?

He doesn't even bother to lift his head before calling out that no they're not and to "go be a drunk somewhere else"

(No. he does not see the irony. The bottles around him are for science dammit. He's working)

But the person does not go away. In fact, the man has the absolute fucking audacity to ask a second question about whether he knows where the nearest open bar is

"The fuck do I look like, the yellow pages?"

Except Lambert actually looks up when talking this time

and....oh. that is a very large man

...the very large man is blushing and stammering out an apology and...ah fuck that's kind of cute

(also he has very big hands. Look it's been awhile okay?)

"hair of the dog?" Lambert asks, against his better judgement

"Uh, no. Babysitting. Did you know how much work smart kids are?"

Lambert is just smirking at him, trying to imagine this giant man being bested by a kid

But apparent he lets the moment hang for a bit too long (he's always been shit at social stuff) because the next thing he knows the guy is back to sweet and pie and on his way

“Right, okay. Well, sorry to bother you Mr…?”

“Mr.? Do I look old enough to be a fucking Mr.?"

And at that point Mr. Mountain actually stops stumbling over his words to look at Lambert more closely

(who, it should be noted, is in a tank top and has very nice arms)

cue Eskel giving Lambert a very obvious once over and the dawn of the patented "I'm gonna to have you against a wall smirk"

"No...no you definitely do not."

gulps "It's Lambert"

"Eskel"

"...look, I'm not fucking making anything special at this hour, but," he gestures across the mess of a bar, "you like Juniper, have your pick"

Eskel smirks, "I've never had anything against fruit" (cue groans from the peanut gallery)

So Eskel ends up perching his very large self on the very small barstool

And up close he is somehow, impossibly, bigger.

Lambert is a size queen. In all possible definitions of the word. He knows this. He's stopped trying to deny it a long time ago. But it's not like he's a small guy so people make...assumptions...and anyway point being he's maybe just a bit distracted is all

Anyway next thing Lambert knows Eskel is awkwardly clearing his throat

And right. The booze. What kind of bartender even is he.

"How sour do you like it?"

"I prefer sweet, myself" - all the eye contact. Because Eskel is a walking dad joke

Lambert does not blush and turns down the bar to grab one of the sweeter drinks (which he had decided was the wrong way to go hours ago, but not everyone can have his taste)

Anyway when he comes back and gives Eskel the drink their fingers brush and Eskel says "good boy"

Lambert shudders

So there Lambert is, having a minor heart attack. Is he in a porno? Did he volunteer for a porno when he was drunk and forget about it? Is Jaskier setting him up? Shit, that does sound like the kind of thing that fucking idiot would do. ...If he finds out Aiden tattled on him and his lack of a sex life again he will throw him out in the back alley, he can find another line cook, they will. all. die.

Except then he notices that Eskel is not looking at him

Eskel is looking to his right

Eskel is looking at his cat, Millie

His fucking escape artist cat who is supposed to be safely asleep in his office and not out here being a fucking public health risk to both his patrons and Lambert's still pounding heart

And....

"Who the fuck tells a cat good boy???"

And now Eskel is giving him a reallllll assessing kind of look

"I figure dogs shouldn't get all the love"

Not like Lambert doesn't agree, fuck he likes this guy a little more for it, but he's still more than a little off kilter because now he's having to push back the desire to just fall to his knees right on the spot so...deflecting. Lambert is good at deflecting.

"She's not even a boy!"

"Ah. Sorry girl," Eskel practically coos, reaching his hand out to try and coax the cat closer

(it does not work. Millie hisses. Lambert is proud)

"Shouldn't have assumed your gender identity like that. Good girl, come here girl"

Millie, because she is a proper asshole but also the goodest girl (shut up he's allowed to do it, it's his cat) does not come, which honestly is a lot more restraint than Lambert is showing right now

So after that they banter for awhile and despite Lambert's best efforts to be a right bastard Eskel seems mostly just amused by his attempts.

He turns out to be a little bit of a fucking bastard himself, which does nothing at all to turn Lambert off

And then at some point Eskel, impromptu of nothing says "do you want to see my wood?" (did you think we were done with the groan worthy innuendos? because we weren't. I promised rom-com dammit)

"What?!?!?!"

Lambert's internal monologue by now: not a porno not a porno not a porno not a porno

Turns out, Eskel is a woodworker. And also socially awkward like Lambert. He'd noticed that Lambert's bar, while not...not nice...lacks a little personality. So Lambert's not a damn interior designer. Sue him. It's perfectly fine. Nothing is wrong. But picture those dime a dozen Wayfair tables with the fake wood tops and screw on metal legs.

So Eskel thought Lambert might want to...you know...see his wood

Of course Lambert ends up driving out to the edge of town to Eskel's workshop (if he's overdressed for a workshop he blames it all on Jaskier)

Oh I should clarify that in this Jaskier is Geralt's husband and Lambert's sometimes employee sometimes live entertainment sometimes most likely cause of ending up in jail before 40. They will figure the connection out at some later point and Jaskier will have the most fun with it

Anyhoooo. Eskel makes very nice wood. That steam bended shit that we'll pretend doesn't only exist in art museums. Lambert, being the detail guy that he is, properly appreciates the different grains and colorings and general craftsmanship and if Eskel wasn't a little bit in love before he is now

So they finally come across this table

And Lambert makes some remark about wondering how it's even standing up, it looks so fragile

And Eskel bets him it's 10x sturdier than anything he's got in his bar

"Oh yea? why don't you prove it?"

Cue lambert getting absolutely nailed on top of the table with lots of position kink and soft dom because that's how I roll

"Just stay still for a minute, there you go. Can you hold yourself open a little more for me? I want to see you, pretty thing that you are. Good. Good boy. Now just stay there, I want to take a good long look at what you're going to give me."

Oh and of course Lambert is wearing lacy panties.

Eskel had lube and condoms in the workshop because he a hoe. (also he lives in an apartment above the workshop but that doesn't seem worth mentioning until post-table railing). Because again, under the sweet exterior he is also a bit of a bastard. We love him for it.

They all live happily ever after and have many excellent orgasms together the end

p.s. it takes Millie two years to warm up to Eskel but they get there eventually

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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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im cleaning out my phone and found that i have saved this tiktok no less than Five separate times

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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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just watched spiderverse again so here’s another hot concept: now that the multiverse is all blendy, portals start popping up everywhere in new york. it’s usually only for a few seconds, just long enough for a Villain of the Week to fly through and a spiderperson to swing in and punch them back into their dimension, sometimes with an assist from their new spiderman. nyc quickly settles into its new normal and starts debating which spidey team up is the coolest. meanwhile officer jefferson davis is starting to get real annoyed with the homeless-looking guy who keeps wandering through portals to “check up on” spiderman

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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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Would you do 21. "How much of that did you hear?" with Lambden+Jaskier?

Oh I most definitely would :3 lambdenskier? lambskierden??

lambert x aiden x jaskier, 18+, lé dirty talk, usage of words like b/tch and s/ut, but affectionately, fangs, knots, having sexy thoughts about your brother's best friend, and said friend being down for it

---

Safely tucked away in Lambert's bedroom in Kaer Morhen, the witcher moaned and shuddered freely as Aiden's strong hips thrust against his his own. The older witcher's cock buried deep inside of him, harsh movements hitting Lambert's spot every time. Aiden's arms were wrapped around his thighs, held them up so that Lambert couldn't squirm away, had no room for false shyness. Aiden grinned, his sharp lion fangs showing behind his lips. “Ugh, look at you, you're so fucking loose. Your hole is gaping around my fat cock but it just can't tighten up.” Lambert whined pitiful, knowing full well what he must have looked like after Aiden had spend hours opening him up with slick.

“It's not enough, is it?” The cat asked purring, his voice gone husky with lust. He knew how much it affected Lambert and took every opportunity to use that knowledge to see Lambert shiver and whine underneath him. “Gods, you're such a slut, kept whining for me like a bitch in heat all evening long. Unbelievable.”

Lambert wished he could deny it, but he was painfully aware of the truth behind those words. Knew that he had spend the evening in Aiden's lap, wiggling his butt against his lovers cock, had been swinging his hips when walking had dropped his Gwent cards one too many times just to bend down where Aiden would see. And now he paid the price, not that he minded too much. But hearing the filthiest of words drip from Aiden's lips always send him over the edge.

Lambert shuddered through his orgasm with a yowl, his own cum spilling hot over his stomach and chest and yet Aiden didn't stop thrusting. And then he started talking again. “Imagine how he would react if he saw you like this. Big bad wolf, nothing more than a sloppy mess, my precious cum drooling out of you just because you kept begging for more. Begged me to stretch your slutty hole wider and wider and now look at this.” Lambert keened, hiding his face behind his hands, trying to wiggle away from the cat, but was unable to budge. Aiden was a little shit like that, using one of Lambert's filthiest fantasies against him just after cuming, making everything more sensitive. “Would he be disappointed, Lambert? Or would he just shove his thick cock next to mine, splitting you open on his knot? You've seen him, have you? I bet Jaskier's cock is bigger than yours, he'd be able to fuck you so good.”

Lambert felt like screaming. The thought, oh the thought of Jaskier's cock next to Aiden's, pistoning in and out of his used hole, filling him up with cum- He clawed at the sheets, hips bucking and back arching. His cock filled again and he helplessly searched for friction. Anything at all, but his arms were heavy and Aiden's grip unyielding. The cat chuckled, “Oh you like that, don't you? Like the idea of me and Jaskier fucking you?” Lambert sobbed. “Answer me, Lambert. Do you want our knots? Want us to cum down your sloppy little hole until it's spilling out of you? You'd be ruined for everyone but us, no one else will ever be enough for you.”

Lambert's chest coiled and he patted his left arm against the messy bedspread. Aiden slowed down at their sign, still rolling his hips, moving against his lover but giving Lambert time to breathe. And then he suddenly froze, golden eyes growing huge. Annoyed, because he hadn't wanted him to actually stop, Lambert stretched his neck to see what had his cat distracted. He went rigid once he saw Jaskier standing in the door frame.

The bard's eyes were huge, mouth open and closing without a sound, speechless at the sight in front of him. „Fuck,“ Aiden finally blurted out, his sun kissed chest heaving up and down. „How much of that did you hear?“

Jaskier went through a series of expressions, shoulders and fingers twitching. Then he took a grounding breath and answered, “More than enough.”

Lambert's eyes stung from embarrassment, but he couldn't move, couldn't look away. “Uh-” Aiden started, but just like his lover, didn't know what to do or say. Jaskier crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame with his shoulder, obviously thinking about something. “Not that I'm not flattered with the attention, but is it just a theoretical thing you two have going on with me or...” the bard asked, not finishing the sentence, but the implication hung clear in the air around them. Lambert whined quietly, muscles clenching around Aiden's cock. The cat turned his head back towards the other witcher and they locked eyes. They hadn't actually talked about this before. Lambert's crush for Jaskier had seemed like a completely one sided thing that Aiden was happy to indulge in, but they hadn't talked about a possible reality of it.

Silent conversation between them, Aiden quirked his eyebrow and to his amusement found the wolf nodding at him shyly. He grinned towards the bard and winked, “Hop in, pretty boy.” Jaskier laughed and undid the buttons of his doublet.

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watchthewolvesfall · 4 years ago

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