I crave death. She/they. Ace. I don’t know, I’m trying. I’m very tired and I feel elderly all the time. My inbox is always open!
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You know for the first 18-ish years of your life everyone your age is mostly doing the same things and then all of a sudden every year for the rest of your life somebody your age is getting divorced while somebody else just learned what a leaf is and you have no idea what’s going on or what you’re supposed to be doing
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astronomy club sent up a weather balloon w a gopro in it last friday. put in three packs of fruit snacks so they could have a giggle over eating fruit snacks that had been to space.
balloon went up into inner space, about 90,000 feet. came down right near the dinosaur park. a few physics teachers drive out to get it, crack it open on the way home to start watching the footage.
fruit snacks are missing.
multiple sources confirm that fruit snacks were put in balloon and sealed in with duct tape. physics teachers check entire balloon. no fruit snacks.
physics teachers watch footage. all 7 hours of it. right in the middle of footage, there are about 8 minutes of visual and audio static when balloon is in orbit. no other interference with balloon recorded.
conclusions: ???????
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Spilled Milk, c. 1882, by Alfred-Arthur Brunel de Neuville
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I dunno man. I found out today that a subway sandwich is $14 now. A shitty subway footlong sandwich that isn't actually 12 inches long and is occasionally made with expired ingredients and was never a great option to start with. I ate those in high school because I was broke and at the mall a lot.
There are poke bowls in my city from a local place for $16. Super fresh fish and veg, warm rice, more than I can eat in one sitting, for the price of a sandwich and a drink at america's most mid-tier sandwich shop.
Someone in another post said (paraphrased) you used to be able to get something mediocre for cheap, but now the mediocre things cost as much as the nice things so why would you?
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mid life crisis ? no no, mid DAY crisis. happens every day
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Male writers writing female characters:
“Cassandra woke up to the rays of the sun streaming through the slats on her blinds, cascading over her naked chest. She stretched, her breasts lifting with her arms as she greeted the sun. She rolled out of bed and put on a shirt, her nipples prominently showing through the thin fabric. She breasted boobily to the stairs, and titted downwards.”
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some of you aren’t even perverts you just have normal sexual desires that you are ashamed of
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STOP CENSORING SUBTITLES/TRANSCRIPTS/CLOSED CAPTIONS
LET DEAF AND NEURODIVERGENT PEOPLE READ “FUCK”
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jokes to make after failure that aren’t self-deprecating:
I’m the best to ever do it
Nobody saw that (best if said loudly)
No one’s ever done it like me
I could be President/they should make me President
Behold, a mere fraction of my power!
The public wants to be me soooooo bad
I’m an expert in (thing you just failed at)
How could this have happened to god’s favorite princess?
Nothing ibuprofen and a glass of water cant fix
I’m being sabotaged
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drinking water when I have a headache should give instant relief. it should go away. what's even the point of drinking water if it can't do that
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Since being diagnosed with cancer my husband has become very willing to step into arguments at his workplace and elsewhere because “nobody wants to be seen yelling at the guy with brain cancer” and so far his success rate is shockingly high.
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