whatif-1999 - Tumblr blog

whatif-1999 · 5 years ago

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just the two of us.

pairing: matthew tkachuk x reader

an: okay so nothing in this story is real and you’ll have to pretend covid isn’t a thing, but here’s a short little (late) birthday thing for matty the ratty! Also, I have no idea if he even likes these places in stl but I do so fictional him does too.

word count: 3.7k+

It was always the same routine every year. Every year since you had met Matthew, you spent his birthday the same way. You had tried to throw parties and tried to make the entire day about him, but that never worked. Every year he insisted on the same old thing. Starting the day off with a stack of his favorite pancakes, going to see an early afternoon movie, walking around Forest Park in the afternoon, dinner at Fitz’s on the Loop for dinner, and then ending the night driving around town looking at Christmas lights. It never failed. It was the one consistent part of your life, starting at the young age of eight, and if you were being honest, you loved it more than your own birthday. You loved celebrating your best friend in the simplest, purest form possible. He never complained, and he always wore the brightest smile on his face the entire day, so you knew it was his idea of perfect.

But not this year.

Truthfully, you had been preparing for this. You knew that, eventually, his schedule would become too busy and the day that you had always spent together would soon be spent apart. You had gotten lucky that this was the first year he wasn’t around, considering he had been perpetually booked since he turned eighteen. When Matthew signed with the London Knights, you had worried that your friendship was going to suffer, but he always made sure that it didn’t. He was always there on the eleventh of December and you always celebrated together. At a point, it was almost as if he was doing it so that he wasn’t letting you down, despite it being his birthday. But this year, his hockey life finally caught up with him, and instead of meeting up with him at his favorite diner for pancakes, you were sitting there alone.

When Matthew had broken the news that he was going to be in Nashville, not St. Louis, for his birthday, you had done your best to hide your disappointment. It wasn’t his fault. Hockey was his job, and sometimes, it came through and messed up traditions that had been set before his career had begun. It was the first time where it had interfered with his birthday, but not the first time for a number of other things, so you should have been used to it. However, as you walked into the diner on December 11th and moved towards the booth that the two of you always occupied on this particular day, the pit in your stomach only grew as you thought about how he should be there with you.

You really didn’t have to come. If Matthew wasn’t here to celebrate, you really had no reason to be here by yourself. But, deep down, you still wanted to feel a sense of normalcy in your routine, so you did it anyway. You didn’t tell him that you were coming here at first, but you couldn’t stop yourself from sending him a snap of the stack of pancakes when they arrived at your table with a simple caption of, “happy birthday! wish you were here”.

You smiled to yourself as you took the first bite, the maple syrup coating your lips as you thought about all the times Matthew had teased you about how messy you could be, even though he was rarely any better. The mix of the syrup and chocolate chips felt like a warm welcome home, even though you weren’t the one who had left. You wondered if that was one of the reasons why Matthew had always insisted in keeping up with the tradition, even after he signed in Calgary.

After your first few bites, the screen of your phone lit up to signal that you were receiving a call. More specifically, you were receiving a FaceTime call from the boy you had just sent a snapchat to a few minutes prior.

“I can’t believe you’re eating there without me,” Matthew grumbled the second his face popped up on your screen. “It’s my birthday, and you’re eating at my favorite place… without me.”

You couldn’t help but laugh, despite how sad you felt on the inside, as Matthew’s pout filled your screen. You couldn’t see anything going on behind him, so it was just his face, but you figured that he was sitting in his hotel room by himself.

“That’s what happens when you become a hot-shot hockey superstar, Matty. Sometimes, you miss out on the world’s best pancakes.” Your words did nothing to change the frown that was on his lips as he asked to see the plate of food that you had ordered. Another groan filled the air as you showed him your half-eaten stack of chocolate chip pancakes.

“God, I would give anything to be there right now,” he murmured wistfully, and when you turned the camera back around, Matthew gave you a sad smile.

“I’m sure your teammates will come up with something way better,” you replied as cheerfully as you could. “Hell, maybe they won’t even make you pay.” The last part of your statement earned a genuine laugh as the camera on his end shifted as he seemed to be moving around the room.

“Are you going to see a movie today too?” Matthew asked, and you nodded before taking another bite of your breakfast.

“You know that action one you told me you wanted to see? I figured I would go to that one,” you replied, and Matthew rolled his eyes as it was your turn to laugh.

“Of course, you are. How are you having more fun on my birthday than I am?” The tone of his voice made your chest ache, and you couldn’t stop your facial expressions as they formed into a small frown.

“Believe me, it’s way more fun with you here.”

You didn’t want to make him feel bad on his birthday just because he had bigger, more important things to do than spend his day running around St. Louis with you. You would be okay. Your friendship would be okay. But that didn’t mean that it didn’t suck, and you had a hard time dealing with change, especially after fourteen years of doing the same thing.

“I’ll see you at Christmas,” Matthew offered, as he seemed to take this as his cue to be the strong one. “And seriously, don’t feel obligated to walk through the tradition by yourself. But thanks to you, I will now be at practice thinking about those pancakes, thank you very much.”

Your frown quickly turned back into a grin, and you and Matthew talked for a few minutes more before he said he had to go get ready, and you had to pay as your bill had just come. You said your goodbyes, and even though you didn’t want to hang up, Matthew’s face was soon gone, and you were left by yourself once more. While you paid, you thought about how, the last couple of years, Matthew had fought you for the bill because he insisted that he was the one that should pay for it.

“But it’s your birthday,” you whined, when Matthew had pried the receipt from between your fingers. “Your parents would hate me if they knew I let you pay for your own birthday breakfast.”

Matthew gave you a look from across the table as he slipped his credit card into the bill envelope.

“My parents couldn’t hate you, no matter what you did. I think they like you more than they like me, so they’d probably hate me if they knew I made you pay,” he retorted. You knew that he was kidding, but the soft look in his eyes made your heart flutter.

“Whatever you say, Matty.”

Your next stop was the movie theater. Every year for the last few years, you had gone to the AMC on Olive to see whatever movie that Matthew found the most interesting. This year, he wasn’t here to pick it out, but you knew which one he would want to see, and you weren’t lying to him when you said you planned on seeing it now. In a way, it made it feel more like he was with you, just without the incessant talking and nudging throughout the entire thing. Granted, the entire time you were sitting in the theater, you noticed how much you missed his annoying movie habits. Not that you would ever admit that to him, however. That would just have to remain your own little secret.

After the movie was over, you contemplated with yourself whether you were actually going to go to Forest Park or not. It was 35 degrees in St. Louis, and you weren’t sure that walking around in the cold would make you feel much better. It had always been Matthew’s favorite part of the day, however, and when you checked your phone when you got to your car, you were further convinced on what you knew you needed to do by the text message that was waiting for you.

Tell Art Hill I said hello : )

You let out a small sigh as you placed your phone in your cup holder and then started your car to head to your next destination. You knew now that, if you didn’t send Matthew a picture overlooking the hill that was situated in front of the Art Museum, he would be disappointed. And the last thing you wanted was to disappoint your best friend on his birthday.

Once you arrived, you tried to park as close to the Art Museum as possible so that you wouldn’t have to walk too far. You had always dealt with the cold while Matthew was around because it was what he wanted to do, but today, you were making an exception for yourself. When he was here, he would tease you about how bundled up you would get, even when the temperature barely dipped below 40 degrees, and you would just shoot him a glare in response. His body always ran warmer than yours did, so obviously, he could never understand.

The park was relatively quiet, though you were still surprised at how many people were out and about. There were couples walking their dogs, and children running up and down the hill, racing one another for who could get to the top first. You smiled as you watched them, but you couldn’t help the pang in your chest as your eyes drifted over to the couples that were blissfully enjoying each other’s company. Their gloved hands entwined, cheeks painted pink from the wind- they looked so happy. You were sure that, if Matthew were here, you would look about the same, only without the hand holding. Not that you would complain if that were included as well.

You decided to sit down against the wall that surrounded the Apotheosis of St. Louis, your eyes trained on the water at the base of the hill below. You had been here so many times, you could really lose yourself in your thoughts without feeling like you were missing anything in the view. The water was still, as the fountains were turned off, and people were strolling around the perimeter of the water, chatting and going about their December day like nothing was amiss. But you knew better. There was something missing. Something important.

You had never truly admitted to yourself how much this day really meant to you before. Sure, it was your best friend’s birthday, but it was so much more than that. In the fourteen years that you had been doing this, the day was always reserved strictly for Matthew and Matthew’s family. Never once did he bring anyone else into the celebrations, and never once had he tried to deviate from them. It was an unspoken rule that it stayed the same and no outsiders were permitted. Maybe that’s why you grew so attached. Maybe that’s where the feelings had developed.

The feeling of your phone vibrating in your pocket broke you out of your thoughts, and when you pulled it out, you were surprised to see that it was Matthew’s mom. You hadn’t spoken to her, or anyone else in the Tkachuk family aside from Matthew, that day, but you knew that if she was calling you, it was important. When you answered, you were immediately greeted with Chantal’s cheerful voice asking if you were busy. When you assured her that you weren’t, she proceeded to invite you out to dinner with the rest of the family later that night. At Fitz’s.

“It’s tradition, after all,” she had reasoned, and a small smile spread across your lips.

“Of course. I’ll be there.”

After you hung up, you stood from your spot on the ground, and took a quick snap of your view to send to Matthew. You didn’t bother captioning it, because he was sure to understand without any context, and then you decided it was time to head back to your car. You didn’t feel much like walking around alone, and if you were going to dinner with the Tkachuk’s, you needed to get home and get changed.

Matthew hadn’t snapped you back by the time you got home, and even after you showered and got changed, you still had no notifications from him. It shouldn’t have bothered you. You were sure that he was busy with hockey and hanging out with his team. Even though you had spent the day alone, he shouldn’t, and you hoped that whatever his teammates had put together was something even more amazing than what you could have managed. He deserved that, you thought to yourself. That still didn’t make you any less sad as you got back into your car to head to the same dinner that you went to every year, but this time, the most important piece was missing.

Fitz’s was busy, but not too busy, and you were able to find a parking spot just behind the restaurant off of Delmar. Taryn had texted you a few minutes before to let you know that they already had a table inside, and to just let the hostess know that you were there for their party. You felt a stirring in your stomach, much like you always did before seeing any of the Tkachuk family, as you stepped into the foyer of the restaurant and gave the hostess your name. With a smile, she led you around the corner and up the stairs to the upper level seating, and as soon as you reached the landing, you recognized Keith and Chantal on the far side of the room. Chantal raised her hand to wave at you, and you gave a small smile and wave in return as you thanked the hostess and made your way over to their table.

“Hey! How are you?” Chantal greeted, as she moved from her seat to come around the table to give you a hug. When she pulled away, there was a big smile on her face as she let you go so that you could take the seat across from her.

“I’m good. How are you guys?” you asked, leaning over to nudge Taryn, who was sitting in the seat next to you. Brady was sitting at the end of the table, and he gave you a smile and a nod before turning back to the menu that he was looking at. You weren’t entirely sure why he bothered because everyone always got the same thing. It was part of the day.

“Did you get pancakes and go to the movies today?” Taryn asked, and when you glanced over at her, there was a knowing look on her face.

“Matty told you about that, huh?” you asked bashfully, suddenly embarrassed that they knew that you had gone through the efforts of celebrating his birthday alone.

“He made me promise if you gave me any movie spoilers, not to share them with him. He also asked me to punch you in the arm for getting pancakes without him,” she replied, and you rolled your eyes.

“Well, I think it’s sweet that you went and celebrated,” Chantal chimed in. “I know he wanted to be here so bad, but the team insisted that they get to Nashville a day early.”

Your stomach churned as you tried to push the unpleasant feeling away. He was so close, and yet so far away.

“And thank you guys for inviting me to dinner. Honestly, I had planned on coming here anyway, but it’s nice to have company for this part,” you replied, and it was Keith’s turn to cut in.

“You’re welcome anytime, you know that.”

While Keith had always been harder on Matthew, he had always been more than welcoming to you. Ever since you were young, he had treated you like his second daughter, and while Matthew often gave you hell for how much better his dad treated you as opposed to his own son, you knew that getting along so well with his family was one of the biggest reasons the two of you were such great friends. Forming a bond with his parents and siblings had only made your personal bonds that much stronger.

It wasn’t long before the waitress came over to take your order, and you ordered the same chicken sandwich you always got with a mug of their black cherry soda. Everything felt normal, if you could overlook the one glaring difference, and it wasn’t long before you had settled into happy and casual conversation with everyone. You were so wrapped up in a story that Brady was telling from his last game in Ottawa, that you didn’t notice both Keith and Chantal’s eyes drift over your shoulder to something behind you. But then, you heard his voice.

“I can’t believe you’re eating at my favorite place without me, again. And with my own family this time. I thought you were my best friend, YN.”

You were up and out of your chair faster than a lightning strike, and when you spun around, you were greeted with Matthew’s signature smirk as he stood a few feet away. You couldn’t believe it. He was here. He was standing in the middle of the upper level dining room, making his way towards you, and he was really here.

“Matty, what are you- how did you- where- what?” you stuttered out as he stepped closer, his smile getting brighter as he seemed to be enjoying the momentary crisis that you were having.

He was wearing a regular red Flames sweatshirt, a pair of black sweatpants, and his curls were in disarray from the wind that had started to pick up outside. He looked the exact same as he had when you had seen him at Thanksgiving a few weeks ago, and yet, he somehow, he also looked better. Maybe it was because you hadn’t been expecting him, and you had spent the whole day missing him. Either way, you couldn’t stop yourself from launching yourself into his arms, a low laugh slipping through his lips at your reaction.

“I missed you too,” he chuckled as his arms wrapped around you to hug you back. You held onto him so long, convinced that if you let go, he would disappear completely, that you forgot his family was right behind you. It wasn’t until Brady called out, “get a room”, that you finally pulled away, a light flush spreading across your skin.

“I can’t believe you’re here. I thought you were in Nashville?” you asked, your hands remaining on his shoulders as you took him in.

“I was. But, the game isn’t until tomorrow, and after practice, I begged coach to let me come back for the night. It is my birthday after all.” The smile that he gave you caused your heart to skip, and you realized that his hands were still resting on your waist.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” you told him earnestly, and his smile softened as he used his hold on your hips to pull you into him again.

“Me too.”

He was warm, even though he had just been out in the cold, and you sunk into his chest as it finally became real that he truly was standing right in front of you.

When you pulled away for the last time, Matthew grabbed a chair from one of the other tables nearby and placed it on the end between you and his mother. You sat back down next to Taryn, and you could feel her eyes on you, but you didn’t look over at her as you watched your best friend greet his family. Brady was immediately chirping him from across the table, and his mother was asking how his trip was, and it didn’t take you long to realize that they had all been planning this without you knowing. You couldn’t even find it in you to be upset that they had kept it a secret from you because you were just so grateful to have this last little part of the tradition kept alive.

“So, we’re going to see Christmas lights after this too, right?” Matthew asked, his eyes trailing from his dad back over to you. Your smile widened as you nodded, and butterflies filled your stomach at the look on Matthew’s face at your confirmation.

While the first part of the day had felt off, and a little wrong, now everything seemed to be falling back into place. It was December 11th, and you were eating at Fitz’s, and talking about the neighborhoods you were going to hit up for Christmas lights with your best friend. It was the perfect end to your favorite day, and when Matthew’s hand found yours under the edge of the table, you knew that you wouldn’t have changed a single event for anything.

“Happy birthday, Matty,” you whispered as you leaned over to take a bite of the ice cream that he had ordered for dessert. He gave you a look, but it quickly morphed into a look of fondness as he moved forward so that you were the only one at the table that could hear him.

“I wouldn’t have been able to spend it with anyone else.” His words sent a thrill through you, and you could tell that he meant it.

No matter what was going on, December 11th, Matthew’s birthday, was always meant for the two of you.

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