whatsalisl

[whatsalisl]

my hottest take

[whatsalisl]

if you ever tell me that you go to a chiro this is what i envision them doing to you

[whatsalisl]

you are 16. you are talking with a gay man in his 50s or 60s, a friend, huge and gentle with a scarf and short fluffy curls of gray hair, who has directed you in two plays staged in your mid-size artsy town. (he has not yet asked you to be in his production of The Laramie Project which will change your life. this conversation will also change your life.)

he is talking about theatre. he is talking about theatre when he was younger. he says, "of course, it was AIDS then." in the pause, you ask him. clumsy and quiet and 16 and "straight," you ask him. what was it like.

he takes a moment in which his face is not like a person's face. "there was a time," he says, "i'm not sure how long, years. when i went to a funeral every weekend." he tells you about two funerals in a day, and choosing between friends when you couldn't make it to both. he does not look at you, he looks at them. his wet grey gaze is so clear that you start to see ghosts. it will be years before you understand why it feels like your grief too. why the ghosts call you family.

[whatsalisl]

you know a joke that never EVER gets old is when a character says smth like “I will NOT go to [place] and that is FINAL” and then it cuts to them in that place I eat that shit up every single time

[whatsalisl]

went to an elementaryschool musical production and they started the show with the director saying: "Now there's some very small viewers here today, so just so you know. There will be a scary character later in the show. This is her," and a girl in a kinda scary ghost outfit did a creepy walk across the stage, the stood up straight and did a cheery wave, "but remember, it's just Nina. She's pretending to be scary."

Aaaand i would very much like for horror movies to have that as a little bonus feature you can chose. Let me start a movie with Guillermo del Toro showing me a scary ghost that might jump at me, but don't worry, thats just Doug!

[whatsalisl]

there's nothing i like more as a computer program than a long period of silent contemplation - not doing anything, not rushing anywhere, just standing here and enjoying this moment with the user. oh, it seems once again he has summoned my beautiful and ruthless wife Task Manager. hello, my darling! what are you doing with that long cruel scimitar

[whatsalisl]

i honestly don't even care if ive already posted this. look at it again

[whatsalisl]

a pastry is more than a snack or little treat it is medicinal. it's a vitamin

[whatsalisl]

being on tumblr for a long time but never reading homestuck like

[whatsalisl]

Research has shown that pleasure affects nutrient absorption. In a 1970s study of Swedish and Thai women, it was found that when the Thai women were eating their own (preferred) cuisine, they absorbed about 50% more iron from the meal than they did from eating the unfamiliar Swedish food. And the same was true in the reverse for the Swedish women. When both groups were split internally and one group given a paste made from the exact same meal and the other was given the meal itself, those eating the paste absorbed 70% less iron than those eating the food in its normal state.

Pleasure affects our metabolic pathways; it’s a facet of the complex gut-brain connection. If you’re eating foods you don’t like because you think it’s healthy, it’s not actually doing your body much good (it’s also unsustainable, we’re pleasure-seeking creatures). Eat food you enjoy, it’s a win-win.

[whatsalisl]

making my ancestors proud by chainsmoking in my bed and drinking an energy drink knowing I don't have to go plow a fuck ass field at 6 am

[whatsalisl]

it's always "for god's sake what are you doing" and "why did you peel back all the wallpaper" and never How was the creeping The creeping looked fun was it fun

[whatsalisl]

i love narcan i love plan b i love cross sex hormones I HATE almond milk it's too thin for most vegan drinks and baking yet too fucknasty flavored for a lot of cooking you'd want something thinner for so what's its deal exactly

[whatsalisl]

tracy chapman really unlocked something with fast car. you cant listen to fast car without Feeling. every person who has ever and will ever listen to fast car has felt the same feeling as every other person who has or will listen to it. fast car is an experience. it should be listed in the dsm5. felt too much while listening to fast car.

[whatsalisl]

HP Hatecraft, the opposite of HP Lovecraft.

HP Hatecraft, the world's least racist author who owns a cat with a normal name

[whatsalisl]

should i eat first or shower first *has phone in couch time for another 3 hours due to choice procrastination, a behavioral phenomenon observed in pigeons and rats as well*