wherethebravego - Tumblr blog

[wherethebravego]

[wherethebravego]

It’s time for you to transition from knowing better to doing better.

[wherethebravego]

Summer sun

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[wherethebravego]

[wherethebravego]

[wherethebravego]

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[wherethebravego]

stretch marks are beautiful tummy pouch is beautiful and you are beautiful 🌺 https://www.instagram.com/p/B-s7iz7hb3K/?igshid=tflhy2hrj25d

[wherethebravego]

loungin’

[wherethebravego]

lemon + ginger infused local honey

[wherethebravego]

Birthday feels...⁣

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I get so tired of feeling. ⁣⁣

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I’m always feeling. Feeling anything, feeling everything. Feelings out of nowhere, feelings on top of feelings. Unnamed feelings, uninvited feelings. Tight feelings, tugging feelings. I-don’t-even-know-what-the-fuck-this-feeling-is feelings. ⁣⁣

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I lay here, once again, full of feelings. I had a vague idea of how I wanted my 30th birthday to go. Having sacrificed the last decade, not to mention my mental, emotional, and physical health, to my academic and professional life, I was determined to do fourth year differently. I owed myself experiences. Hobbies. Memories. Mistakes. To take up all the space I’d been denying myself for years. Not waiting on anyone’s permission or accompaniment. Tired of my own bull shit and everyone else’s. I owed it to myself to be my fullest self unapologetically. To graduate and enter my next chapter in the best and healthiest space of my life. ⁣⁣

For 30, I would party with friends, enjoy walks outside, take in the beauty of the city, eat delicious food, laugh until I cried. Reflect on the last thirty years, on all the lessons I learned replacing everything I thought was a loss at the time. Secure in how I’d grown over the last three decades and excited for the future. ⁣⁣

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Now that the time has come, I don’t feel any of that. Instead, at this very moment, I am full of an unnamed, permeating melancholy. Subtle sadness and veiled visions. Restless reflection and irritating introspection. Unexpected disappointment. A loose loneliness. ⁣⁣

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I try to remind myself that to feel is a gift. To feel things so intensely is a blessing. So many people are closed off. Unable to feel. Unable to connect. Unable to resonate. Unable to know themselves or truly share connection with anyone else. ⁣⁣

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Even in the midst of my feels, I remember my lessons. The only way to know peace is to have known unrest. The only way to know happiness is to have known sadness. The only way to know love is to have known indifference. You cannot one-way this shit. ⁣⁣

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Accepting myself fully, I know that my capacity to feel is one of my greatest strengths. That my feelings in this moment are valid, but impermanent. They will pass, like waves. Making space for lighter, more joyous feelings when the time comes. And when it comes, having been brave enough to know its opposite, I will be able to breathe in the joy just as deeply.

“In a Sentimental Mood” on Duke Ellington and John Coltrane, released February 1963.

[wherethebravego]

“Stop trying so hard for people who don’t care.”

— (via purplebuddhaquotes)

[wherethebravego]

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[wherethebravego]

jaycina

[wherethebravego]

"At any moment you have a choice that either leads you closer to your spirit or further away from it."

~Thich Nhat Hanh ...