whiskey-not-scrumpy

[whiskey-not-scrumpy]

Sergei thought nothing more of the Sniper after he had jumped out of his nest, merely getting along with his job under the comforting buzz of alcohol. A short cry left his lips as he felt a bullet right in his ass and he fell onto his hands and knees, groaning.  Faintly, he heard the familiar voice of his team’s Sniper hollering something. That asshole. Biting his lip, he began laughing hysterically, body shaking with his attempts to try and contain it once he looked up right at the other RED.

“You think that’s bad?!” he yelled, painfully getting back to his feet and retrieving his sticky bomb launcher. “I’ve had bed partners more painful than this! Good thing I wore red today- you’ve got the idea of it, seeing as you wore brown today, mate!” Cackling more, he jogged his way out of the Sniper’s sights before finding a Medic to heal him up. Walking this time, of course.

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“Kinky.” The RED grunted, rolling his eyes and hardly flinching at the pain from the now open wound in his shoulder. “Y’know, I see your problem. You’re not really a people person. Lacking social skills there, my friend. Usually key for a work place.” He tilted his head back and the bottle met his lips as he gulped whatever contents left inside down. Red was seeping into his clothes but Sergei didn’t seem to notice as he threw the bottle at the wall, glass shattering on the impact. All gloominess was expelled from his face as he got up, brushing himself off and then waving around his grenade launcher while he hiccuped. Drunkenly, he patted his teammate on the head and cooed.

“Soft hair.” Was all he said before he was jumping out of the nest and back into the battle.

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Sergei moved slightly, avoiding the blade so it penetrated the skin of his shoulder rather than his face.

“Whoa, whoa! Careful of the whiskey.” he passed the bottle into his other hand and drunk again, seemingly not caring about the knife now sticking from his body. “Mph. Rude. I came to warn you- and a quick drink, not get stabbed.” Most likely the Spy he had spotted earlier was gone by now, anyway. 

“Hey, being a Demo requires some level of skill. You need to aim-” A pause. “…sometimes.” The RED took a swig from the bottle, idly fiddling with the grenade launcher on his lap. “Spliced, huh? I know a few of them- ooh, that burns going down…” he coughed and paused. “What was I doing up here again? Ohh, that was it. Snipes, watch your back- Spy’s here.” He took another casual gulp of the whiskey.

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“Hey, being a Demo requires some level of skill. You need to aim-” A pause. “...sometimes.” The RED took a swig from the bottle, idly fiddling with the grenade launcher on his lap. “Spliced, huh? I know a few of them- ooh, that burns going down...” he coughed and paused. “What was I doing up here again? Ohh, that was it. Snipes, watch your back- Spy’s here.” He took another casual gulp of the whiskey.

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“I am affronted! I am so doing my job!” Sergei placed a hand over his heart and tried his best to look physically hurt. “I just thought my dear team’s Sniper needed some company- who likes being cooped up in here, all alone.” the man sat beside the Sniper, stretching out a pulling out a bottle of whiskey from his jacket.  “Want some, Snipes?”

@percivalmcleach liked this for a starter 

“Oooh, what’cha doin’ Snipes?” The Demo had, rather suddenly, appeared by the Australian’s side, leaning into his scope and offering the brightest grin. Such a thing, like Sergei’s overbearingly childish curiosity, was normal- but extremely annoying seeing as it was in the middle of a battle. 

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@percivalmcleach liked this for a starter 

“Oooh, what’cha doin’ Snipes?” The Demo had, rather suddenly, appeared by the Australian’s side, leaning into his scope and offering the brightest grin. Such a thing, like Sergei’s overbearingly childish curiosity, was normal- but extremely annoying seeing as it was in the middle of a battle. 

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Starter Call

[I’m an ass and forgot that my dear Sergei existed. Like/Reblog for a starter with this asshole.]

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Send my muse some flowers and they'll react to their meaning

Begonia — “We are being watched.” Blue Flax — “You are very kind.” Blue Hyacinth — “I will give my life to your service.” Bronze Chrysanthemum — “Though I value your friendship, I cannot love you.” Daffodil — “I do not return your affections.” Deadly Nightshade — “I believe you to be false.” Foxglove — “You are not really in love.” French Marigold — “You are unreasonably jealous.” Hawthorn — “Despite your answer, I shall strive to win your love.” Iris — “Your friendship means so much to me” Lavender — “I like you very much, but this, I am sure, is not love.” Mistleoe — “Kiss me” Myrtle — “Be my sweetheart.” Ox-eye Daisy — “I might learn to love you.” Pink Carnation — “I’ll never forget you.” Purple Hyacinth — “I am sorry, please forgive me.” Red Rose — “I love you” Scarlet Geranium — “I do not trust you.” Spider Flower — “Elope with me.” Sweet Pea — “Thank you for a lovely time.” Tea Rose — “I’ll remember, always.” Viscaria — “Will you dance with me?” White Camellia — "You’re adorable.” White Rose — "I love you not.” Yellow Rose — "I love another.”

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Send me symbol for my muse’s opinion:

☠ : Opinion on death ➶ : Opinion on killing ☮: Opinion on peace ☯: Do they believe in karma? ✤ : Do they believe in luck? ✟ : Religious beliefs ♂ : Sexuality ☿: Opinion on gender ❤: Opinion on love ❥ :Opinion on love from the first sight ♞: Favorite animal(s) ☕: Favorite food(s) ♛ : Opinion on outer beauty ☀ : Favorite season(s) ☽ : Favorite time of day ☂ : Favorite weather ◎ : Opinion on lying

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puts a tiny kitty in Sergei's hair and goes off

“... Something’s in my hair-” The man immediately reached up and plucked the cat form his person, grasping it by the scruff of the neck and string scrutinisingly. “Yep, that’s a pussy cat alright. Aren’t you a sweet lil’ thing?” A grin broke across his face and he scratched the kitten below the chin, cooing.

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Not-doing-too-good sentence starters

“Whoa, are you okay?”

“You took that hit pretty hard…”

“Don’t stand up yet.”

“That definitely looks broken…”

“Walk it off.”

“How are you feeling?”

“When was the last time you slept?”

“You look like shit.”

“Have you been eating enough?”

“Here, let me help you.”

“Why are you limping?”

“You’re really pale…”

“Did you just go throw up?”

“Why aren’t you eating?”

“______? You’re bleeding…really bad.”

“That looks infected.”

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?!”

“I told you you’d get sick.”

“How many fingers am I holding up?”

“Wake up–you were hyperventilating, are you okay?”

“It was just a dream, you’re alright.”

“Look at me–you’re safe.”

“Take a deep breath.”

“Are you bleeding?!”

“How’d you get a bruise like that?”

“What happened?”

“Let me help you!”

“Can you hear me?”

“You hit your head pretty hard.”

“Don’t move.”

“I know it hurts, I’m sorry.”

“Breathe.”

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When you kinky and sexual and shit but still got a real big heart

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Head-canon Time!

🍰: Does your muse cook?

😊: What makes your muse Happy?

💕: Is your muse in love with anyone? / How can I win your muses heart? (Clarify)

👗: Favorite outfit?

💬: Do they swear?

😨: What frightens your muse?

😞: What depresses your muse?

🐾: Animals? Y/N?

🌷: Favorite flowers?

☔️: What do they do when it rains?

☀️: What so they do when it’s sunny?

🎮: Video Games?

🎄: Favorite Holiday?

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Let’s Play a Game!

Send my Character a truth or dare. Let’s see what you can get them to do~

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Kidnap my character. Put them through hell.

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Try to seduce my Muse.

Then they will respond and rate you:

Never been less turned on | Ugh no | I’d give you a try | Yes, yes, YES | I’M READY NOW DAMMIT

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send me a symbol, and--

i’ll write a starter or drabble where our muses get some level of drunk together– the symbol specifies just how drunk they are! 

⚪️ - just a little tipsy 🔵- definitely drunk, but still aware of their surroundings 🔴- absolutely smashed ⚫️ - no longer functioning human beings