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when you touch a Bad Texture™ and have to scrub at ur hands until the feeling is gone

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Take IS HERE!!!!

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crowley appreciation post<3

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I was actually just thinking about this the other day.

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Albino Screech Owl - Eastern Morph by Quincy the Matchmaker

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Happiness Will Come To You.

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I can’t help it, Bernard’s reaction is just priceless :D :D

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When you realize there’s no more episode

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#vincentprice

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The Crow (1994)

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45 Quotes From HIMYM That Are Legen — Wait For It — Dary. Legendary.

I peed in an alley which happened to have a church which I did not see because I was drunk! Barney, Season 1, Episode 9

The best I can give you is a fake smile and dead eyes. Robin, Season 1, Episode 16

Your package has always been big enough. You may not realize this Marshall Eriksen, but you’ve got a huge package! Lily, Season 1, Episode 17

We struggle so hard to hold on to these things that we know are gonna disappear eventually. And that’s really noble. Lily , Season 1, Episode 17

Whenever I’m sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.Barney, Season 2, Episode 2

Because sometimes even if you know how something’s gonna end that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the ride. Ted, Season 2, Episode 14

The littlest thing can cause a ripple effect that changes your life.Ted, Season 2, Episode 15

That’s life, you know, we never end up where you thought you wanted to be. Marshall, Season 2, Episode 17

You and Marshall belong together. The two of you have something most people search their whole lives for and never find. I know you love him and if you knew what he was going through right now you wouldn’t be here for one more second. I bought you a ticket home. Marshall is one of the best people I know and it won’t be long until someone else realizes that and you will lose him forever. Barney, Season 2, Episode 19

Lily, there are a million reasons why I love you. You make me laugh, you take care of me when I’m sick, you’re sweet, caring and you even created an egg dish and named it after me. She puts a little Italian dressing on the eggs before she cooks them, it’s called Eggs Marshall and it’s awesome. But the main reason is you’re my best friend, Lily. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had. Marshall, Season 2, Episode 21

It’s like Descartes says, “In order to determine whether we can know anything with certainty, we first have to doubt everything we know.” Ted, Season 3, Episode 5

Sometimes we search for one thing but discover another.Barney, Season 3, Episode 14

Dude, lots of chicks think that architects are hot. Think about that, you create something out of nothing. You’re like God. There is no one hotter than God. Barney, Season 2, Episode 4

OK, here’s my thing – if gay guys start getting married, then suddenly the whole world’s gonna be doing it. That’s how it works: they start something, then six months later, everyone follows. Like… now everyone gets manicures.Barney, Season 2, Episode 10

Oh, my God, look at you cowards! So afraid of any kind of change. So terrified of anything new. So-so desperate to cling to anything comfortable and familiar. Robin, Season 4, Episode 4

We’re going to get older whether we like it or not, so the only question is whether we get on with our lives, or desperately cling to the past. Ted, Season 4, Episode 4

God, it’s me, Barney. What up? I know we don’t talk much, but I know a lot of girls call out your name because of me. Awesome.Barney, Season 4, Episode 7

Everyone has an opinion on how long it takes to recover from a breakup. Ted, Season 4, Episode 9

Ted, how many times have I told you to put the lid back on the peanut butter jar?! It’s this inconsiderate, immature jackassery that makes me feel like I’m living in The Real World House! And not the early days when they all had jobs and social consciences, I’m talking about Hawaii, and after! I can’t take it anymore! Ted, Lily and I are married now! It’s time! We’re getting our own place! Marshall, Season 3, Episode 7

I wound up shame-eating the whole pizza. I woke up all greasy and sweaty. My sheets looked like what they wrap Deli sandwiches in. Maybe I should join a gym. Do you go to a gym?Ted, Season 3, Episode 10

Hey! I don’t remember you. I’ve spent the last two days trying to remember every girl that I’ve slept with and all of the horrible things that I have done to them- and I have done some horrible things. I mean, at one point I’m pretty sure I sold a woman. I didn’t speak the language, but I shook a guy’s hand, he gave me the keys to a Mercedes, and I left her there. I am the guy who keeps a scrapbook of all the women I have slept with, but I never thought I was the guy who would sleep with a girl and not even remember her. So, from the bottom of my heart, for whatever I did to you, I apologize. Barney, Season 3, Episode 14

We spend an hour arguing about where to eat, and we end up here anyway. I haven’t eaten for two days. Can we please, for the love of God, just order something now? Robin, Season 4, Episode 2

There are a lot of little reasons why the big things in our lives happen. Ted, Season 4, Episode 22

I keep waiting for it to happen. I’m waiting for it to happen. I guess I’m just tired of waiting. And that is all I’m going to say on that subject. Ted, Season 4, Episode 23

Look, you can’t design your life like a building. It doesn’t work that way. You just have to live it… and it’ll design itself. Lily, Season 4, Episode 24

He may not fit society’s definition of a hero, but he is the hero I needed. The hero who helped me recover from the disaster of my failed almost-marriage and get back into the game. He lives in the shadows. Is he a dream? Truth? Fiction? Damnation? Salvation? He is all these things and none of them. He is…The Naked Man. Ted, Season 4, Episode 9

Definitions are important. Lily, Season 5, Episode 1

You can’t just skip ahead to where you think your life should be.Lily, Season 5, Episode 20

It’s just, eventually we’re all gonna move on. It’s called growing up. Lily, Season 5, Episode 22

There are two big days in any love story: the day you meet the girl of your dreams and the day you marry her. Ted, Season 6, Episode 1

It’s time to let go of the fantasies. It’s time to grow up. Barney, Season 6, Episode 2

A word of advice: play along. The more you fight it, the worse it’s gonna get. It’s like when your car slides on ice, you stir into the skid. Ted, Season 6, Episode 13

The future is scary but you can’t just run back to the past because it’s familiar. Yes it’s tempting… Robin, Season 6, Episode 24

People don’t get the chance to discover each other anymore.Ted, Season 7, Episode 6

We gotta wait for the real thing, no matter how tough it gets.Ted, Season 7, Episode 11

I never wanted that… Of course, it’s one thing not to want something; it’s another to be told you can’t have it. I guess it’s just nice knowing that you could someday do it if you change your mind. But now, all of a sudden, that door is closed. Robin, Season 7, Episode 12

For the first time in my life I don’t want to find myself in three years with some random girl, no matter how many boobs she has. I wanna be with Quinn. Barney, Season 7, Episode 20

You guys dated before. That time counts. The clock doesn’t reset to zero. It un-pauses from where you left off. Lily, Season 8, Episode 5

I realized that I’m searching, searching for what I really want in life. And you know what? I have absolutely no idea what that is.Barney, Season 8, Episode 9

Revenge fantasies never work out the way you want. Marshall, Season 8, Episode 11

Whether a gesture’s charming or alarming, depends on how it’s received. Ted, Season 8, Episode 12

Somewhere along the line, I forgot to pursue my dream and now I’m old and I’m a mom and it’s just too late for me. Lily, Season 8, Episode 17

In marriage, being right is less important than being supportive. Remember: Happy wife equals happy life. Lily, Season 9, Episode 5

I’ve never asked Lily to do anything “no questions asked” because I never wanted to. She’s the love of my life. I never keep anything from her. Marshall, Season 9, Episode 7

I used to be in such a hurry all the time. Everything was so urgent. Now I figured, if it’s going to happen it’ll happen when it happens. I’m not going anywhere, she’s not going anywhere. What’s the rush, right? Ted, Season 9, Episode 9

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