willscanceradventure

[willscanceradventure]

cusp of week 5

SMTWTFS / SMTWTFS / SMTWTFS / SMTWTFS / [S]MTWTFS

i passed out on the fifth day, i dont think they were supposed to poke me so many times in the week (iv’s hurt!).

2nd cycle began last week, did all my chemos in one. saturday i got a cool hgh patch that electronically released the meds and then i just peeled it right off. so now i have two weeks of no more procedures.

my cousin shannon came over to help, yay. she told me nobody’s wearing a mask outside.

taking pills is boring. every day goes pretty quick but it cant feel slow enough.

[willscanceradventure]

i dont think week 2 is fully done but i’ll just make these whenever

im a very busy man, there’s still air to breathe in this room and i have to speedrun my way through all these side effects

my med breakdown:

day 6-8: in the morning a steroid, two blood thinners, anti-hiccup, anti-nausea, tylenol + my other dailies, afternoon hgh, at night two blood thinners, anti-hiccup, anti-nausea, claritin, and before bed the stronger anti-nausea

day 9-10-11: same but no more steroid

day 12-onward: same but no more steroid, no hgh, so no claritin, and only one blood thinner each time

so wednesday is when i stopped going in for the hgh shot, because the insurance company still hasnt approved an at-home version. when I asked what the progress was on that, she said she had no way of knowing, it wasn’t her department (???) when i told her “im getting this stuff one way or another because its my whole immune system so do you you have any safe transportation at least?” she said she couldnt make any promises. and then when i said “thats cool but if i get the virus i die so you need to figure it out because failing to actually get me the meds wont work here” she said she understood. i dont think she understood any of it.

Monday night i had some Wingstop wings my brother brought home. The hot flavor is not hot whatsoever, there’s literally no spice on it. The cajun was pretty good. So the next day i ordered more of the hotter flavor up, and two things happened: the spiciness wasn’t much, but it ruined my stomach the whole rest of the day, and it tasted like soap. so now i have to stay away from spicy foods and this saddens me greatly. and if something tastes like soap, stop eating it. and the wings were like a dollar each, dont go to wingstop.

i took a thing called greencar to the hospital for the shot, it was $16.50 each 7-minute trip and they were all teslas. the first guy was very cool, 10/10. the second lady did not wear a mask until i asked, did not know she was picking me up from the hospital, and gave me a sermon on how the virus isnt over yet.

tuesday evening I felt so tired that i slept through dinner, then because i was so tired, didnt want to make dinner, which made me more tired. at 10pm i made ramen. low sodium ramen tastes like shit, so i added salt. no change in taste at all, until i got to Too Much Salt. and my mouth was numb. fruit, it turns out, is my best friend. I can taste fruit and each as much of it as i want. so i had half a quarter of a cantaloupe.

wednesday i am still too exhausted to move. this is a problem because i have to take an uber to the hospital (their price is $20 roundtrip) and this seems like the biggest mountain in the world. so i call the number for the uw cancer nurse desk and they ask pull up my med schedule and give me some advice: if you just sit there you’re gonna get weaker. so you gotta get up and stand and make food and take meds otherwise its gonna be way harder the longer you sit there. that seemed like the easiest thing in the world to me, so i took a break after the call for an hour where i stared at the ceiling in my bed and then i did all those things.

most of wednesday was just laying in bed doing nothing, which is a side effect of the hgh + actual pain in your bones. i had twenty strawberries for dinner.

now ive got this nagging cough that freaks people out but is really just from the one chemo that inflames my lungs. my parents came over on sunday and monday because my dad wanted to see the chemo appointments. i am literally shedding hair, but not enough to pull out fist fulls. every side effect is a surprise. i cant lay on my left side because it feels like my lungs are grinding against the tumor, which they are. these are busy days and i am working hard.

[willscanceradventure]

hey week 1 is done

it sucked who knew

i’m on 3 chemos: 3 on monday, 2 tues-fri, and the other 1 the next two mondays. so tomorrow is the other 1. they all give me nausea, and lack of appetite, and general fatigue. on days 6-11 of each cycle i take hgh to replenish the white blood cells in my marrow. the insurance company wont cover it yet for at-home use but i need it to survive so they better fuckin figure it out.

on days 6-8 i need a steroid, the same one they’re saying makes an impact against Covid, so thats cool. and on days 6-11 i need a double dose of blood thinners for the blood clots in my lungs, and then day 12-onward i can do a single dose. every 6 hours i take an anti-hiccup medication because the diaphragm spasms and makes eating a hell, and every 8 hours i take the anti-nausea stuff and then the stronger version before bed. and then tylenol for general aches.

docs said i can go outside and be around people, just not in crowds or indoors too much. so a walk down to the lake or to get coffee outside is fine. i’ll see about how much physical activity i can do, but short walks and lifting things seems ok.

worst part is i cant ride my motorcycle, which was my main form of transportation. i just dont have the mental or physical focus to ride it anywhere beyond my block. a bicycle i can do, and this is a very bike-friendly city, but man a motorcycle is everything to me. it really is difficult not being on it but there’s not much i can do, so im working on either selling it or storing it :(

activism is also difficult since i can’t be in crowds anymore, i know how to do it and i can help my allies but its way easier to walk in a protest. but there’s a lot you can do from afar so its not like im useless now.

my mom helped me out for the last week and kept me company, and my brother is also my roommate. im not alone but im not in-person sociable right now, so please call me and talk about other stuff than cancer.