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Im a scary leftist and im gonna give you free healthcare oooooo. Im gonna give you affordable housing too if you keep complaining fucking idiot

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jokes to make after failure that aren’t self-deprecating:

I’m the best to ever do it

Nobody saw that (best if said loudly)

No one’s ever done it like me

I could be President/they should make me President

Behold, a mere fraction of my power!

The public wants to be me soooooo bad

I’m an expert in (thing you just failed at)

How could this have happened to god’s favorite princess?

Nothing ibuprofen and a glass of water cant fix

I’m being sabotaged

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them

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horsey :)

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sanctum

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nsfw sideblogs r so funny. my friend we can't talk here it isn't safe.. we have to go to sex world together

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fireplace is such a funny word for that. i mean yeah lets not beat around the bush here; its a fire place. the place for fire. the place chosen especially to have fire. fireplace.

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this truly is the stupidest game in the universe. quest titles in ffxiv consist entirely of jokes the borderlands writing team rejected for being too dumb. heart eyes

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yuri-ween is upon us

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it'd be over in a moment

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i love roblox car crash gifs

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tripped over a severed head on the sidewalk and wound up with a broken cock. my life is hell.

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vampire Miku & Rin !!

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my favorite drakengard dialogue