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Jeff.

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“woke grinch advertising to appeal to millennials & gen z kids” is possibly the single dumbest and dystopian shit i’ve ever seen in my life

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imagine being an elderly nun and katy perry tries to steal your house and then sings oh happy day at you while reading the lyrics off her phone and then sues you and then you die in court. they should replace the book of job with that article

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“The new She-Ra isn’t what I want women to look like, which means she looks like a man! The show has different sexualities and body types, what SJW garbage! How am I supposed to jack off to this?”

“The one black director of Spiderman: Into The Spiderverse is a leftist on Twitter who supports antifa! That means this movie is SJW soyboy propaganda! I’m boycotting!”

“MCU Captain Marvel doesn’t have an ass and doesn’t Smile Enough! Brie Larson is an SJW with a cunty looking face! And why does this Marvel Rising cartoon exist? This is just feminazi shit like in the comics!”

“Star Wars is about Mary Sues and SJW shit now! It’s ruined!”

“What is happening to the entertainment industry?!?! Wahhh SJW feminazi cuck snowflake libtard soy ruining everything!!!!”

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“I don’t think any of us can speak frankly about pain until we are no longer enduring it.”

— Arthur Golden, Memoirs of a Geisha (via books-n-quotes)

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Because this is cute

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https://www.instagram.com/theresafractale/

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Trump’s wall is a political straight jacket that he is demanding Democrats put on, too.

Refuse this asshole’s malicious wall. Make Trump the Coward die a thousand deaths.

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my brain in times of crisis:

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Old People Restaurant Scam. You know the scam. Whine about perfectly good food to get some sort of comp.

In their old age, my parents befriended another older couple who would pull this stunt everywhere they went. After my mother told me a few stories about how their new friends had shown them how to get discounted or free meals, I felt like I was suddenly the responsible adult, concerned about the bad influence these people were on my parents.

While visiting my parents with my girlfriend, this other couple attended dinner with us. As I expected, the food was brought to the table and they immediately began dramatically complaining to one another about the quality/taste/temperature/etc. They were making a scene in order to attract the attention of the waitress. When our waitress returned to ask how we were doing, the miserable old bastard who played the lead role in their act took a deep breathe, struck a dramatic pose (with his hand raised to begin gesticulating for emphasis) and bega–I leaned forward and cut him off before he could finish the first word: “Everything is absolutely fantastic. It’s all great! Thank you very much!” She smiled, and began her obligatory “Great, well if you need any–” when he made a second attempt. “We come here all the time an–”. I didn’t acknowledge that he was speaking at all, repeated that all was just as we ordered and thank her again.

He was stunned and thrown off from his routine by my interruption. During this pause the waitress walked away (It seemed clear that she knew what they were trying to accomplish). He turned bright red. I turned to my girlfriend and, smiling and without lowering my voice, stated how pitiful it is that some people could be dishonest, deceitful and put at risk the livelihood of a cook, server or hostess for a pathetic discount or a free early-bird special. My passive-aggressive reverse-parenting broke my parents of the habit in short time.

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oh hi thanks for checking in I’m still a piece of garbage

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scrolling thru tumblr like it’s a gay newspaper