It's not that I wish the stories were real, It's that I wish I were fictional.
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#love Mr. Browser!#I used to live in White Settlement#Iād stop by this library on my way home from school every day#I remember when they first got Browser#The library sits right next to a small creek#so they had a mouse problem#the librarians were looking for ways to deal with the mice#they couldnāt put traps in the public areas#because kids might mess with them#Browser was the solution#heās also a super friendly kitty#so he makes a good ambassador#I almost catnapped him on accident once#my own cat had decided to nap in the basket of my brotherās stroller#browser smelled her and hopped into the basket to investigate#almost didnāt realize he was there as we were leaving!#I donāt live in Texas anymore#so I canāt go in person anymore#but last I checked Browser is still doing well at 11-12 years old
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āIf I had time travel Iād kill Hitlerā āIf I had time travel Iād stop my favourite politician getting assassinatedā youāre all thinking way too small. If I had time travel Iād stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.
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reblog this and put in the tags something you watched that terrified you as a child. i was so scared of the hot sauce in spongebob that i refused to be in the room when it was on
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Absolutely wild to me how sometimes you don't even realize the way you'd been taught to perceive things as a kid was kinda fucked up, actually, until decades later.
Example:
As a kid, I constantly lived in fear of damaging shit in my parent's house. The walls. The floors (especially the floors. The wood was beautiful. Shiny. But so easy to scratch). The cabinets.
As a sixteen-year-old, I once took my car to the dealership after work and paid a very dear sum of $250 ($10/hr cashier salary) to fix a slight scratch in the paint because I knew if my father saw it there would be hell to pay. It didn't matter that I parked far out, like I'd been taught, and someone scratched it anyway. It was my fault. I failed in my duties as a steward of my vehicle.
Every time I scratched a rim on a curb while parallel parking or got a door ding or, god forbid, didn't wash and vacuum that car every weekend, it was treated like some sort of moral failing.
Last year, when my husband and I first moved into our house, he scraped the side of our car when parking in our (Very Narrow) garage. When he told me, my first instinct was to be afraid for him. Like something terrible was going to happen to him because of this mistake. I urgently reassured him that it was okay, it was an accident, I wasn't mad. Baffled, he was like, "Yeah? I know? Like, thank you for the reassurance, but I'm only a little annoyed, I'm not upset. It's just a car." And I had to take several minutes to process that. It's...just a car.
We keep the car tidy. We maintain it. But we wash it maybe 4x a year. We only vacuum it after dirty road trips or when the dog hair starts to get annoying. It has scrapes and dings and the leather seats have stains. But that's ok. Because it's just a car.
This morning, I realized that a small rock had gotten embedded in the felt foot on one of our bar stools. Neither of us had noticed. There are now scratches on our beautiful hardwood floor. My immediate response was fear accompanied by a heavy measure of paralyzing guilt. "I'm so sorry," I told my husband, "I should have noticed. I'll figure out how to fix it, I swear. I can probably sand down that section and match the stain and--"
"Whoa, hey," he said. "It was an accident. And it's fine. Floors are going to get damaged. They're floors. We live here. There was damage in places before we even bought the house, remember? It's not a big deal. It's just a floor." Right. It's just a floor. Right.
My husband's mom is visiting and this afternoon, as I was sitting in the kitchen looking at the scratches on the floor, I offhandedly asked her if my husband had ever broken or damaged anything as a kid. "Of course," she said. Household items. A TV. A wrecked car during his teen years. I asked how she punished him.
"Why would I punish him for things like that?" she said. "They were all accidents."
Right. Of course. Right.
#thanks for this OP#I get the same kind of horrid fear#when I make a relatively minor mistake#once I was hanging out with my husband (then boyfriend)#I was looking at a little clay bowl that heād made in kindergarten#as I went to put it back on the shelf I rolled my ankle#fell to my knees and dropped the bowl#it cracked in three#I immediately started to shake and cry#not because I was hurt. I roll that ankle all the time š#but I felt horribly guilty for breaking something that heād kept safe for over 20 years#the first thing my BF said was: are you ok?#which obviously made me cry more as I stuttered out an apology#he got me to calm down with hugs and assurances that it was ājust a bowlā#I still insisted on getting the super glue and fixing it though
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Fantastic art. Something tells me this is one of those groups that starts off as pure joke characters that accidentally become serious roleplay over time
big commission for a lovely client
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Tired of your baby girl being seen as a genderless imp? Afraid strangers might not recognize your sexless proto-human as the soft femme heartbreaker she is? Well now you can glue some shit on her head! Thatās right, just glue some gender conformity right onto her unclosed fontanelle! Say goodbye to awkwardly explaining that no, despite her bald head, your androgynous poop machine is actually a demure coquette! Glue your fucking baby today!
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#that GUN though omfg#that abomination looks hand welded#I donāt *think* it would explode when fired#but I wouldnāt risk it
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As I near 200,000 followers here at fishingboatproceeds, I just wanted to sayĀ Cock is one of my favorite tastes. Not only that, but balls smell amazing. It makes me go a little crazy on it to be honest. Like, I cannot get it far enough down my throat to be satisfied. Iām only satisfied when I feel those intense, powerful, salty, hot pumps of cum down my throat. When I sit back on my heels, look up at you with cum all over my mouth and slobber running down my neck, hair all fucked up and wipe my mouth with the back of my arm and ask you if I did a good job and you cannot even speak because Iāve drained all of your energy out the tip of your dickā¦.. Thatās when Iām satisfied.
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religious killer: i can hear God speaking to me, to kill the demons that live in this world with my gun of justice
atheist killer: I kill only because of my own moral code. Whether it's for money so I can survive, or self-defense against a threat, I am the one who chooses when I kill.
agnostic killer: nobody really knows why I shoot people
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Tango. Uniform. Mike. Bravo. Lima. Romeo.
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Belphie is loved by both his aunts, justā¦ā¦in different ways.
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these are two full-grown adult cats. but one of them will always be baby
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Old

But still kicking it
Ragnar unexpectedly lost his sight overnight so weāre trying to figure out what is going on and if there is a way to help him
So far we know itās not due to his eyes, theyāre working as they should, he just canāt see ššš
#I love Ragnar so much#He looks just like my childhood best friend#whoās name was Ranger#my grandma had to bury bricks under the fence because of this dog#Because my boy dug himself out on multiple occasions#only to show up at my elementary school at recess
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Congratulations to Brooke from Let's Not Date for winning Father's Day.
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