wishingstone

[wishingstone]

Questions about two of your original characters about their relationship. Should work for friends/lovers/coworkers/enemies/etc, maybe not so much for family, but you're welcome to try!

How did they meet?

How long have these two characters known each other?

What were their first impressions of each other? How does that compare to their impressions of each other now?

How would they describe each other if asked? Physically? In personality?

Do they get along? Why or why not?

Do they have any shared interests/hobbies? Do they ever do these hobbies together?

How often do they see each other? Where do they usually meet?

How do they communicate with each other? Are there any recurring phrases or gestures unique to their relationship?

What is one quality they have in common?

What is one major difference between them?

Does one act as a narrative foil to the other? How so?

Do they have any affection for each other? How do they show it?

Do they have any disdain/contempt for each other? How do they show it?

Do they share the same goals in life?

Do they trust each other? Why or why not?

Is one of them keeping secrets from the other? Why? How would they react if the secret was revealed?

Are they keeping a secret together? How do they feel about that?

Do they view their relationship as temporary or permanent?

Are they satisfied with their relationship? Do they wish they were closer/more distant?

What is their best memory together?

What is their worst memory together?

When were they the most vulnerable with each other?

Do they have any mutual friends? Mutual enemies?

How do these two interact with each other in public versus in private?

If a stranger saw them together, how would they describe their relationship?

How would these characters react to being stuck in a small room with each other?

How far would they go for each other? Would they risk their own lives for each other?

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victoria chase is my favourite misogynist because she’s in it for the love of the game and the fear of admitting her romantic attraction to woman

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why can’t nathan and victoria be a happy evil cunt serving duo in either ending 😢

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he already did that to be fair

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Some of these drawings are rlly old but idc 😭 I'll just dump everything in a little messy pile

Recent Aggie doodles with the bestie @zanenidroin0

Oooof and the last one is from 2023 I beleive ? Back when I was still emo and listening to Mother Mother (I still am) 😔

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Ideas are cooking for my pride outfit.

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: : S / O E X T R A S.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝓽hey’re fluent in all 5 love languages when it comes to you, but especially yours.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝓽heir eyes soften every time they look at you, like the world stops spinning for a moment.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝔂ou often catch them staring at you like you’re a work of art they’ve never seen before.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝔀hen you speak, they don’t just listen. They study you; your lips, your hands, the sparkle in your eyes.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝓮ven in a room full of people, they only seem to see you. You’re their focal point, always.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝓽hey’re incredibly emotionally intelligent and grounded. They never gaslight, dismiss, or ignore your feelings.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝓲f someone disrespects you, their voice drops a full octave and they’ll check that person on sight.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝔀hen someone mentions you, their face lights up. your name tastes like sweetness on their tongue.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝔀hen you’re overwhelmed, they know how to make you feel safe without making you feel weak. they see the strength in your softness.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝓽hey physically can’t go a day without touching you in some way; hand-holding, forehead kisses, protective arms wrapped around your waist from behind. (In a way where you're comfortable of course.)

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝔂ou always feel emotionally held with them, like the world can fall apart, but not them. not with you.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝔂ou can talk for hours about everything and nothing. It never gets boring with them.

꒰ 𐙚 ꒱ 𝔂our emotions are sacred to them. they never try to “fix” you, just hold space and hold you.

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"I want to be a dragon."

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please

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quote source

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decisions, decisions

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i just need to have more rules for myself. more rules and limits. surely that will help me

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read this if you're confused about persistence, if you've been affirming for months and nothing's shown up, if you're wondering whether you're doing something wrong but can't figure out what. not a method post. not a technique post. just what’s actually going on when it's not working yet.

ok. so. hi. this is going to be messy and probably upsetting. not because it's dramatic. don't flatter it. but because it's honest. and honesty gets weird when you're dealing with a field that's still so underexamined. we're all just poking the edge of the simulation with a biro. and maybe i should leave it alone. maybe i'm overcomplicating again. maybe this is one of those moments where i should just shut up and script and go to bed. but. no. i can't. i don't know how to shut up about this. and maybe this isn't even the truth. maybe this is just one lens. but fine. whatever. here it is.

context: someone asked me today. "how do i force myself to shift in a short amount of time?" (@srcerers this is your fault....affectionately) and i was writing the usual. the "correct" answer. if you decide it, it's done. if you say you shift instantly, you do. period. PERIOD. done and done, tried and true. the golden assumption + confidence = success formula.

and then i spiralled. because i've been saying that for months. and yes, i've shifted. yes, i've seen results. but before that???????? i spent ages deciding. persisting. affirming. knowing. and still. nothing. and no, this isn't about pedestals. this isn't about wanting it too much. this isn't a fucking disney villain song about obsession. this isn't "just let go babe." no one here is pacing the astral gates with mascara running. this isn't longing. this is clarity. this is when you know it's yours and reality still has the audacity to play pretend.

you're not begging. you're not desperate. you're just wondering why the algorithm is lagging. and you're allowed to. you're god, and the lights are flickering. you're allowed to knock on the wall and ask why.

and sure. someone might read this and say "you were overthinking." or "you were still checking the 3d." but it's not that. this isn't panic. it's not frantic. it's the calm after the calibration. this is what happens after you stop checking. after you stabilise. after you fully assume. when you don't need results to believe. but they still don't come. and so you ask. not because you're doubting. because you're refining. it's not sabotage. it's devotion. it's wanting to understand the edge of your own dominion.

and the thing is. in the past, i wasn't hoping. i wasn't tiptoeing. i was in. all in. clearly, absolutely. no checking. no waiting. i wasn't treating the assumption like a wish. i was living like it was already law. so i continued in this spiral. because if you're god. if your thoughts create. if you say "i am in my dr" now and you mean it, like actually mean it, shouldn't that be enough?? i say this confidently, because after shifting so much, yes, that is indeed what happens. but. for people who haven't experienced that privilege. like. confidence plus assumption equals done. right??? so then why not. where does the decision go. does it just evaporate. does it fall behind the couch cushions of the multiverse. in what fucking universe do you decide something every day with conviction and it still doesn't root. how does that not calcify into fact.

so let me give you a scenario. maybe it's you. it was definitely me.

you're affirming day and night. not hoping. not wishing. knowing. you've decided you are in your dr. period. you walk like it. talk like it. feel it. you're not checking for results. not looking over your shoulder. not waiting for it to kick in. because it already did. your inner world is loud. it's screaming this is it. i'm there. not even zeus could knock me off the road because as god is my witness, i am in my goddamn dr.

and, nothing. no hogwarts. no mansion. no parisian cigarette moment with my boo in the rain. just your room. your walls. your body. again. again. again.

and it doesn't make sense. because the law is the law. you're god. your thoughts create. shifting is instant. so what the fuck is happening.

and look, i used to think there were only two ways to persist. either you're in power mode, clean, cold certainty. emotionally detached, i've already shifted, i'm just reinforcing it. or you're in panic mode, still affirming, still assuming, but there's this silent grip underneath. if i stop deciding this, it'll fall apart. and yeah, on the surface those feel like two different planets. one feels sovereign. the other feels shaky.

but if you strip the tone out of it, if you stop obsessing over how it sounds and just look at the architecture, both are assumptions. both are decisions. both count. because the law doesn't care if you're cool about it or crying about it. it only cares that you're doing it. that it's declared. that it's held. so if both modes are valid, then why do they sometimes fail????????

and this is where it started to come apart for me. because both 'i've already shifted' and 'i need to keep deciding' are still assumptions. one just feels better. it's smoother. but structurally, they're the same. and if the panic one isn't checking, if it's clean panic, if it's quiet panic, it should still land. it should still work. but sometimes it doesn't. and that's what broke the seal. because if it's not about hope, not about doubt, not about waiting, not about checking, and you're affirming like a master shifter, what the fuck is it? and i'll be using me as a poster child of examples and say that, hey, although shifting is now easy for me - i still struggle with manifestations. so. why???

and that question is the reason i'm even writing this at all.

so now maybe you're thinking (if i hopefully have not fully gutted your brain as i have with mine while writing this):

maybe it's because i'm doing it from panic, not power. maybe i'm secretly doubting. maybe i haven't let go. maybe i'm still in the waiting room. maybe that's because i keep looking at the 3d.

no. stop. cut it out. that's noise.

you can be in panic. you can be in power. it doesn't matter. if you are persisting. assuming. deciding. then it should work. that's the rule. that's the contract. it's not a myth. it's not a loophole. it's not some cult-coded trick line you chant and hope it lands. it's the structure. it's the law.

i kept trying to find a reason. maybe it's density. maybe it's linear cause and effect, like flipping a light switch and expecting the bulb. but loa doesn't work like that. and shifting definitely doesn't. it's not circuitry. it's not push-button response.

if you are the light, then the switch shouldn't matter. you're not triggering something, you are the trigger. you're the source. the mechanism. the whole #&*!$%@ circuit board. so what's jamming the signal. if it's not doubt. not timing. not belief. then what.

and here's the closest thing to an answer i've got (half consolation, half theory, fully an attempt to keep myself from throwing my laptop across the room):

you've already shifted. you just haven't caught up to yourself yet.

i know. i hate how that sounds too. it's vague. it's annoying. it feels like spiritual scaffolding. but it's not. or i at least hope it's not.

when we say shifting is instant, we don't mean the wallpaper peels itself off and your mom turns into dumbledore. we mean the moment you decide, the reality activates. the coordinates reroute. the entire grid adjusts.

it's as if you are rerouting a train track mid-motion. you're still moving. but you're not on the same line anymore.

the problem is, we expect the scenery to change with the switch. and sometimes it does. but sometimes it doesn't. and that's because the 3d isn't a flatscreen. it's not theatre. it's not performance. it's a mirror. and mirrors don't update because you want them to. they update because you've changed so deeply that they literally can't reflect the old you anymore.

so when you say "i am in my dr" and it doesn't look like your dr, that's not proof it failed. it's just a delay. you're already in the new field, but the particles haven't aligned. and yeah, that's maddening. because your body feels the shift. your head knows it. but your eyes won't show it. and then you start to doubt. not openly. but subtly. in the quiet. in the repetition.

so. what can i sum up. persistence is not about time. it's about saturation.

it's not about hours logged or how many affirmations you can fire off in a spiral notebook. it's about how deep it goes. how thick it sticks. and no, that doesn't mean screaming it louder. doesn't mean performing it. it means not needing to say it at all. not because you gave up. not because you're done trying. but because it's default now. baseline. unconscious. it is. not a spell. not a statement. just identity.

shifting isn't something you win. it's not a trophy for spiritual discipline. it's a symptom. a side effect of self-recognition so total, so absolute, that there's no room left for contradiction.

so yeah. both "i've already shifted" and "i need to keep deciding" can work. panic or power doesn't matter if the persistence is clean. if you're not checking. not looping. not measuring the silence. but if you're still waiting, even subtly, even spiritually, it's not saturation. it's performance.

and that doesn't mean you're doing it wrong. it just means you're still becoming. still burning off the part of you that thinks shifting is something to win, not something you already are.

and yes, some people shift instantly. some people shift after six months of saying "i'm already there." and they're not better than you. they're not more "aligned."

they just hit saturation faster. their idea of "this is true" had less gunk to burn off.

you say: but i'm god. i decide. why hasn't it happened yet?

and i say: it has. if it feels like it hasn't, you're still relating to it like something outside you. you're still watching for it.

reality isn’t late. reality isn't anything. it just reflects. it doesn't show up when you're ready, it has to show up when you're being. not when you want. not when you wait. when you are.

if it's not visible yet, it's not because it's in transit. it's because you're still checking. you're still measuring. you’re not failing. you're not early. you're just still treating truth like a method.

and truth isn’t a process. it’s a position. a posture. you don't need to persist for six months. you don't need to reach peak saturation like it’s a score. you just need to stop making realness conditional.

stop affirming like you're earning it. start assuming like it's breath. like it’s done and there’s nothing to explain.

because shifting isn't slow. it's not cumulative. it’s not linear. it’s identity. the second you say: i am - it's done.

not "on its way." not "almost here." and certainly not "it's glitching."

done. and if you're still asking when, then you haven't decided. not really. so stop trying to time it. just be it.

and look. i still believe shifting is easy. because it is. i've done it. i know it's not in charge. but sometimes it's not about method. it's about the silence in between. and that doesn't make the law wrong. it just makes the process actual. i'm not saying shifting or manifesting is hard. i'm saying that staying loyal to the truth when it hasn't shown its face yet takes a different kind of strength.

you don't have to overanalyse it.

but you're allowed to want to understand it.

that doesn't undo the truth.

it just lets you live inside it better.

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TECHNOBLADE IN THE GALLERY!!

The reception for my BFA thesis is TONIGHT! I’ve definitely fallen off of posting regularly here, but I will share process updates as soon as I have some more free time.

but HE’S FINALLY DONE!!!

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what do you do with the 3d?

let's clear the floor. let's slit it open tile by tile. let's sweep the shards into our palms and try again. let me rip the carpet up while we're at it, dig my hands into the marrow of the matter and ask, what are we doing with the 3d, really. are we making it our girl friday or our ghost. are we ignoring the curtain or stepping through it. the question is, do you even recognise what you're looking at.

but let's step back. what is the 3d, anyway. physical reality. consensus hallucination. not sacred, not sinful. not a riddle to be solved nor a cage to be broken. just a card in the deck, drawn with shaky hands. the one everyone agrees to pretend is real. you can treat it like an omen, if you want. or a person you absolutely abhor. but don't mistake it for the author. it's only ever the copy, the imprint, or the last known address of a belief. yesterday's ink on today's page, and even that can smudge.

because everyone has an answer and most of them feel like used tissues. soggy with someone else's satori. should we ignore the 3d. befriend it. spit at its feet like it called us boring. the answers all sound like someone else's language. someone else's idea of what devotion is. someone else's diagram of control. and most of them are at war with nuance. 

the 3d is your echo. it's a feedback loop, a dog who learnt the tricks you taught it. it moves like you do. it learns what you reward. it listens to what you repeat. it's not speaking, it's mouthing back. and yes, it has weight. like wet fabric or a hospital corridor. it has textures. grit. gravity. but weight is not truth. it's just density. what you believe has mass. not because it's real, but because you've given it rehearsal time, memorised the script, built sets around it, fed it from your own bowl.

so here's what the 3d is: a tarot card. upright or reversed, depending on the day. never the deck itself, never the hand that shuffles. it's a reading, not a sentence. a reflection, not a law. its power is borrowed. it's never permanent. it's never personal. it is what you thought yesterday, blinking back at you in today's light. you don't have to ignore it. you don't have to kneel at its altar, either. the 3d can be your chorus girl or your case study.  it doesn't mind. it has no ego. it doesn't need to win. it just needs something to reflect. and if you change your face, it will too.

treat it how you want. name it. reframe it. pin it to the wall or forget it in a drawer. pet it like a cat or argue with it like a brother. none of it matters. what matters is remembering that it follows you. it always does. not because it loves you. because it has no other choice.

just remember: the card is not the future. it's a translation. and all translations are subject to error, to bias, to mood. the 3d isn't fact. it's rendering. if you want a different reading, shuffle again.

it's a ghost. and it only haunts what you've already abandoned.