wizard-curse

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Spellcasters hate this fact but if you just stick your fingers in their mouth while they're casting a spell with a verbal component it's literally more effective than a counter spell.

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For sale, baby shoes, low-key digested

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bottom text?

sure! whats their number?

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"War of the Wizards," Don Greer, Down in the Dungeon (Don Greer and Rob Stern, Squadron/Signal Publications, 1981)

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[wizard-curse]

This one?

anyone have that one werewolf pic? i need it for something

i cant narrow it down i just know its a werewolf

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AND GOD SAID:

Sautee

that thing in butter and garlic

[wizard-curse]

Hey, does anyone know if gnome wizards are venomous? This little fucker bit me when I was walking in the grass so I put it in a jar.

The book and orb are for enrichment and the bells are in case this little prick gets loose again.

i'm going through a wizard era and it's great lmao.

[wizard-curse]

time to evil jerk off

[wizard-curse]

Love me a woman who is cursed by fate and whatnot

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me, flirting: you could probably catch me easily if you chased me through the forest

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just gonna leave this here

[wizard-curse]

my stupid fucking aunt loraine bought us an air friar for our wedding present 🤦‍♀️ the apartments barely big enough for the two of us now weve got this dumb asshole flying around preaching at us ... every time i get a migraine he tries to give me herbs and poultices 🙄

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Has bottom surgery given you any new attacks/abilities?

Pussy beam. Pussy blast. Pussy slow and pussy fast. Pussy left. Pussy right. Come and fight this pussy fight

[wizard-curse]

Fine then. I'll do it myself.

HOWS THAT FOR YOUR TAXES

Wizard Council Bulletin Three

Blog Tax

In addition to our current BOG TAXES, FROG TAXES, LOG TAXES, SMOG TAXES, HOG TAXES, JOG TAXES and FOG TAXES we are now instituting BLOG TAXES. Dogs and grog will remain untaxed thus far due to their universal importance, and we have many dogs in this council.

If you have a blog, and you are a wizard, you must pay us taxes. They must be delivered directly to our tower, in person within a fortnight of us discovering your blog. We are prepared to disintegrate wizard blogs that do not pay their taxes and are not shy with the disintegration.

In addition, joining the Truly Not Corrupt Wizard Council – In Your Best Interest will not only protect you from our disintegrations but also allows you to engage with our esteemed council, whom for years has been the bureaucratic block in the way of great wizarding. Our fundamentals are meals, naps, and hubris, and we smell like cheese. Oh who cares, I am just an unpaid intern, it’s not like the head wizard reads these anyway. I could say whatever I want. He just writes these decrees and I have to type them.

In conclusion, PAY TAXES!

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person: reanimating corpses for use in battle is unethical

necromancer: I am recycling

person: now someone has to go and fight the corpses

necromancer: I am also, consequently, creating jobs

[wizard-curse]

Other wizards will look at him and laugh, "Look! He needs a chariot to fly!" Not understanding he does it for the sick stereo system and to flex.

Look at those rims, those are the rims of a true wizard.