wizdomthruinsanity

[wizdomthruinsanity]

Willing to learn

My oldest child came out as gay/lesbian when they were 13. It didn't surprise me. I knew they were into girls since they were in preschool. Then, 6 weeks later, they told me they were transgender. This was in 2013/14, and I thought they were trying to do the "shock value - angsty teen - how much can I throw mom for a loop" kinda thing.

Needless to say, I didn't know how to react. I was newly recovering from a drug addiction, and I had lost custody of all 3 of my kids a few years before. "Lily", now 'Kurt', being my oldest AND the one I felt closest too before i lost custody of them. I reacted WRONG... Like BIG wrong. They quit talking to me for over 5 years.

I screwed up and I had to work really hard to fix our relationship. We're, unfortunately, not as close as we used to be, but it's getting better. It's hard when they're thousands of miles away, almost 21 and have a life of their own.

Through my recovery I became a minister. And after talking to Kurt, I realized JUST HOW MUCH the LGBTQ+ Community is knocked down and just... Left... Left to themselves and the many devices out there to help 'cope'. I'm not gay, but I know the pain of being disowned by my VERY conservative dad, A mom who had to "stand by the man" no matter HOW bad MY mental health got. From a young age, I tried to end and numb the pain. I looked for love in SOOOOOOOO MANY wrong places. And in my darkest hours, I was destroyed by the "church family" who preached love but the hypocrisy was outlandish. From the age of 13 to 33, I went out of my WAY to denounce 'God'.

So, here I am. A little over 8 years clean. I was able to get custody of my youngest, who is flourishing. I've spent the last 8 years trying to figure it WHO I am and WHY I'm here... And I get it. Here's where I need the most BEAUTIFUL people in the internet... The LGBTQ+ Community.

1. How did your family react when you came out?

2. What issues do you have with 'Religious people'? Be as blunt as you need. I get it.

3. I'm from a small town with lots of corn & bean fields. There isn't a safe place for teens/young adults of the LGBTQ+ Community to gather and just... Be. I have been given the opportunity to start a place where they can gather IN SAFETY, without the fear of being condemned because of WHO THEY ARE. Where we can talk openly, ask questions, find answers, build a community or family, whether they're "in" or "out" or just questioning things.... And I have NO idea where to start, how to get it out there and grab the RIGHT people's attention.

Please feel free to ask me questions, leave a comment or start a conversation. I'm just a broken woman who wants to share the love I was never given to those who need it most.

Thanks!

Jayd