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The Fight

a/n: y'all asked for this one back, here it is. enjoy!

the one where carson and auston almost break up

word count: 2.7k

Everything happened so quickly and unexpectedly.

It was just a regular Tuesday in late September, and Carson was still adapting to some new things in her life. She graduated from university that June and landed a job as a social media marketer a month and a half later for a company in downtown Toronto.

She wasn’t to start her new job until September, and with the money she had saved, Carson could spend most of the summer in Arizona with Auston.

It was the third summer in a row that she had visited him during the offseason. Sure, being there for over a month was much longer than the usual week or two Carson would usually spend visiting her boyfriend in the city he grew up in during years prior, but it was needed. And it was nice for the most part, but it, too, brought some change.

About two weeks before Carson was to fly back home to Toronto, Auston asked if she would move in with him. They had been dating for over two and a half years, and he felt they were at that point in their relationship.

It worked out, too, because Carson’s lease at her old apartment was up at the beginning of September. Lexie was leaving Toronto altogether, so Carson was left looking for a new roommate or place to live.

Carson was open to whatever; she just needed a place to stay. However, her search ended when Auston asked her to move in because, although hesitant to do so, being afraid they may not have been ready for that step, Carson didn’t see a reason to say no.

Things went great… at first.

When Carson returned to Toronto alone, she began slowly packing and moving some of her stuff into Auston’s condo. Soon after, Auston was also back; he helped her move the rest.

Carson started her new job the day after Labour Day and got to spend almost two weeks living with Auston before he had to leave for Newfoundland with the rest of the Leafs for the remainder of training camp and to kick off their preseason games. Auston was gone for his birthday but returned soon after. Soon after, the guys were to play exhibition games in Ottawa, Buffalo, Montreal and Detroit.

The day before the Leafs was to take on the Habs at SBA, Carson was on break at work, texting Lexie just catching up with her best friend, updating each other on how each of their moves went, when Carson got a notification on her phone.

It was about Auston.

It wasn’t rare that Twitter notified Carson about news regarding her boyfriend, but this tweet, in particular, had her on edge.

“Maple Leafs star Auston Matthews was charged with disorderly conduct and disruptive behaviour in Arizona,” Carson read aloud as she tried to process the news article's title.

Surely, she would have been aware of Auston being criminally charged for something, Carson thought. There was no way he wouldn’t tell her something like that. However, Carson was proven wrong when she clicked on the article and saw the rest of the story.

Carson couldn’t believe what she was reading, but the evidence was right before her, and there was no denying it. Auston had been charged with disorderly conduct and didn’t bother telling her about it.

Anger, disappointment, frustration, and many other emotions hit Carson like a tidal wave. It wasn’t long before she was packing up her laptop and other belongings before telling her boss she wasn’t feeling well and needed to go home. Carson’s boss didn’t press her about it and sent her on her way.

It took Carson about thirty minutes to get home. It wasn’t a long commute back to the condo, Carson worked downtown Toronto as it was, but she found herself taking a long way back in an attempt to clear her mind.

It didn’t work, and she returned home with her heart racing.

When Carson walked into the condo, Auston was on the phone. He was pacing back and forth, pushing his hand through his hair and going off to whoever was on the other end of the call. Carson didn’t make her presence known immediately, but then Auston looked right at her.

“Ok, yeah, I, uh, I have to go. I’ll call you back later, alright? Carse just got home,” Auston said into the phone before telling the person he was talking to goodbye and hanging up. Then he stepped closer to Carson, and she could feel herself stiffening. “Hey, baby.”

“Don’t call me that right now,” Carson spat and watched as Auston’s face went pale. He knew that she knew.

“Carson, I can explain.”

“Explain what, Auston? And why now? It seems you’ve had four months to explain but decided not to.”

Carson could feel the tears building in her eyes and hated that she was on the brink of crying because she was already so frustrated.

Carson didn’t care that Auston saw her that upset. She needed to understand what was happening but wasn’t sure if she trusted Auston enough to tell her everything she needed.

“I-,” Auston started, then paused, and Carson could see that tears were fighting to break free from his eyes too. “I’m assuming you saw the article. Babe, I am so sorry.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Carson asked, her voice cracking. She was terrified to know the answer.

“I didn’t know how,” he stated, and Carson would’ve been lying if she said it didn’t sting a bit hearing that. “I never thought it’d become this whole ordeal. I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t get the chance.”

“Didn’t get the chance to tell me? Auston, this happened in May! What do you mean you didn’t get the chance? You could have told me when it happened or when you flew back here for my graduation at the beginning of June. You could’ve told me when I came to Scottsdale for an entire month or before you asked me to fucking move in with you after you were criminally charged with disorderly conduct but didn’t tell me!”

A sob left Carson’s mouth after those words left her mouth because she knew it was real then. And that sucked a whole lot.

“I know,” Auston sighed and looked towards the ground guiltily. “And I’m sorry, Carse, I really am. I knew you’d be upset and was too chicken to tell you. I didn’t want you to be disappointed. Fuck, this is just a whole misunderstanding. I shouldn’t have been charged at all.”

Now, that comment didn’t sit right with Carson.

“W-what do you mean by that?” She questioned.

“The whole thing was just stupid,” he explained. “I was drunk. I didn’t mean any harm by it. This entire thing just shouldn’t be happening right now. The charge was completely unnecessary.”

“Unnecessary?” Carson scoffed, not believing what she had just heard. “Auston, you made a woman extremely uncomfortable and scared. You can’t decide someone's trauma for them. It doesn’t matter what you meant by it; you still did it and need to own up to that.”

“And this is exactly why I didn’t tell you. I knew you’d get worked up over it.”

“Oh, I’m sorry that I’m getting worked up over the fact that my boyfriend harassed a woman, got charged because of it, didn’t tell me and is now pissed because he’s getting called out for it. God, Auston, grow up! You’re a fucking adult.”

“Grow up, huh?” He asked, looking surprised and raising his voice. “Yes, Carson. Thank you, really good tip.”

“Ok, well, now you’re just being rude.”

“I’m just, this is a lot to deal with, and you being on my ass about it isn’t helping.”

“I cannot believe you right now,” Carson told him while shaking her head. “That’s on you, Auston. Not me. And do excuse me for being on your ass about this because, a friendly reminder, I didn’t know anything! You left me in the dark. You assumed that I’d freak out over this, and honestly, I am not in the wrong for doing so. I would have listened to you if you had told me and tried to help you through it, but you assumed I wouldn’t. And that hurts. I would have tried to understand, but you didn’t even give me a chance. What happened to us being a team and telling each other everything, hmm? That’s why you wanted me to move in with you, right? Cause we’re in this together, but let me tell you, it sure doesn’t fucking feel like it at the moment.”

Carson was crying and saw a few tears in Auston’s eyes. She wanted him to hold her and tell her everything would be ok. But Carson knew better. It wouldn’t be that simple.

“I don’t know what else I can say,” Auston finally said after a few seconds of silence.

“Have you talked to your parents yet?” Carson asked, sniffling and only imagining what could be running through Ema’s head with news of Auston being charged just coming out of nowhere.

However, Auston didn’t respond right away. Instead, he looked away from Carson and to the floor again.

“They already knew.”

“Pardon?”

“They already knew,” Auston repeated and looked at Carson apologetically. ”My whole family knew when it happened. I asked them not to tell you because I wanted to be the one to let you know, and then I just didn’t.”

“Oh, my god,” Carson whispered and had to look away from him, adding the feeling of betrayal to every other emotion coursing through her.

“Carson, it’s not their fault. This is on me,” Auston pleaded as he stepped towards Carson and reached out, but she quickly backed away.

“Don’t touch me, Auston. Please.”

The hurt expression that washed over Auston’s face as Carson said that was almost enough to get her to give in to him right then and there. But she didn’t. She couldn’t.

“I don’t know what I can do to fix this,” he spoke softly. “Babe, I-.”

“That’s something you need to figure out,” Carson cut him off. “Not me. You. You did this, Auston, and have already roped so many people into something I can tell you haven’t taken any responsibility for. The way this is being handled is no one's fault but your own, and I really thought you’d be one to see that.”

“I am, Carson if you’d just-.”

“You made a woman uncomfortable, then told me that her pressing charges were unnecessary because they inconvenienced you. Do you not realize how fucked up that is? Auston, I’ve considered doing something similar because of my psychotic ex, and you know this. I, god, it doesn’t even feel like I’m talking to my boyfriend. I feel like I don’t even know the man that is standing in front of me right now.”

Carson could tell how her words struck Auston, but she didn’t take them back. That was precisely how she was feeling.

“I’m sorry you feel that way,” he whispered, taking a shaky breath. “But I’m still me, Carse.”

“I don’t know if I believe you,” Carson responded and didn’t bother wiping any tears she knew were streaming down her face.

The two stood silently for a moment before Carson stepped further into the room just to go around her boyfriend and head down the hall toward their bedroom.

“Where are you going?” Auston asked as he entered the room shortly after Carson, only to see her packing a bag.

“Anywhere but here,” Carson sniffled as she moved to grab some clothes from the closet.

“Baby.”

“I asked you not to call me that.”

“Carson,” he corrected as he continued following her between the closet and bed. “You’re upset, I understand. But you shouldn’t drive. Let's wait it out, and we can both cool down and talk.”

“I’ll call Mitchy,” Carson deadpanned. “Or Steph, or an Uber, it doesn’t matter. I just can’t be here.”

“You don’t have to leave. This is your home too.”

“Except it doesn’t feel like home, Auston, and neither do you right now,” Carson sobbed as she zipped up her bag and slung it over her shoulder. “I need to go.”

Auston was crying just as much as Carson at that point. “When will you be back?”

“I don’t know,” Carson responded, unsure of if she’d be back, which was a thought that broke her heart even more.

Carson walked by Auston and back to the front door without another word, completely aware that he was right behind her as she went.

Auston watched as Carson started calling, who he assumed was Mitch while gathering her work things and putting her shoes back on. No more words were exchanged between them as Carson opened the door and walked into the hallway.

However, Carson did hear the faint ‘I love you’ Auston said just before the door closed and separated her from him.

Carson was still sobbing as she leaned against the wall for support and waited for Mitch to answer her call. As soon as he picked up, Mitch asked if she was ok, and Carson told him that she felt like everything was falling apart. Mitch asked where Carson was and told her he was on his way to get her.

A couple of hours later, Carson was lying on Steph and Mitch’s couch, wrapped in a fluffy blanket and still crying. Her head rested on Steph’s lap as they sat there watching the second High School Musical movie, which Mitchy thought might not have been the best idea with how Carson began sobbing again when Gabriella sang Gotta Go My Own Way, but still, Carson refused to turn it off.

The last time Carson felt that much heartbreak was when she found out her ex, Chris was cheating on her after being together since she was fifteen. It was from that heartbreak Carson was able to meet and fall for Auston, but never in a million years did she expect him to make her feel similarly to how Chris did. So yes, it was two completely different situations, but it hurt just as bad.

Similarly enough, though, this was the second time Carson showed up at her cousin’s place, utterly distraught over a boy. But luckily for her, Mitch never turned her away and was always there to help where he could. He was always his twin’s rock when she needed it.

Carson didn’t know what to do, think or feel. It was all fuzzy, but she was thankful to have Mitch and Steph to help her through her breakdown.

To try to clear her mind, Carson turned off her phone and left it in the kitchen for the night.

Upon setting her phone down, Carson saw numerous missed calls and texts from Auston. He and his family tried to get ahold of her to apologize and talk, and other family members wanted to check in on her. But she couldn’t face it.

Mitch made sure to talk to Nate, Mya, and the rest of their family just to let them know that Carson was with him and would be staying with him and Steph for as long as she needed to. He informed Carson that Nate and Mya were not impressed and that Lexie called him fuming, which was to be expected. Mitchy also told Carson he messaged Auston because he knew her boyfriend would be stressing over not knowing where she had gone after their fight. In that message, Mitch made sure Auston knew how pissed he was at the situation but still knew Auston would be relieved to get an update on Carson.

Once the movie was over, Carson was too exhausted to watch the third High School Musical, so she opted to watch an episode of The Office while cuddling Zeus before eventually falling asleep.

Steph slowly got out from underneath Carson’s head while Mitch grabbed another blanket and draped it over her so she wouldn’t get cold. They didn’t bother waking Carson up so she could move to the guest room because they knew if she wanted to, she would. So, they let her be and hoped for her own sake; the following days would be much better than this one.

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