writeritd
4 posts
~characters mentioned in the masterlist~I write for wlwđ
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Silver spoon
Pairing: Lottie Matthews x fem!reader
Summary: Can a relationship work out, when both of you have a different definition of growing up with privilege?
You sit at your desk carefully stitching up your shirt, it had ripped at the back while you pulled it over your shoulders after practice. You cut through the thread observing your stitch work. It was noticeable, you knew that, but you didnât want to throw it out. It was one of your more expensive ones. Thereâs a knock at your room door, your mum peaking her head inside âIâm home from work loveâ she looked tired, supporting her nurse scrubs with a yawn waiting to escape her mouth. You give her a smile trying to hide the shirt from her âhey, do I have to ask?â she lets out a laugh âyou know you donâtâ she enters laying her hand on your head giving your forehead a kiss âwhat happened here?â you sigh letting the shirt drop, she stares at it âhoney you donât have to stich that up, weâll get you a new shirtâ forcing a smile you both knowing your savings wouldnât support that idea. You brush her offer off holding it up proudly âI like it. Makes it look more grungy donât you think?â she moves her hand through your hair âit doesâ sheâs giving you that look of guilt you despise. It breaks your heart. Searching a reason to switch the topic you let out âI made spaghetti, dad should be home any minuteâ your mum nods looking down at her scrubs âIâll get changedâ âand Iâll set the tableâ you make your little deal and separate out of your bedroom. Your parents insist you should have the bedroom, them sharing the pull out couch you have in your living room.
You set down the last pieces of cutlery just as the main door opens your dad steps inside. He spots you right away âwowâ he dramatically lets out âyour old man comes home and no hug?â You roll your eyes, a smile forming on your face while walking over to him and he embraces you in a tight hug lifting you up âyouâre breaking my bones dadâ you wheeze out wiggling in his grip, he sets you down âoh come on my future nationals star can handle a proper hugâ he gives you a goofy grin ruffling your hair, which you fix right away. He inhales the scent of the food you had just sat down âyou cookedâ he leans in to whisper âthank godâ your mother comes up behind him slapping him on the back of his head âI heard thatâ he embraces her in a hug as well giving her a quick kiss âI didnât mean it like that!â she pushes him off with a laugh âwhatever you say misterâ.
You all go to your unofficial assigned seats, your dad putting the food on each plate. He directs his gaze to you âso how was your day honey?â you shrug your shoulders the day not seeming all that special âschool, practice, the usualâ he raises his brow at you ânothing special? No one special to see?â heat rises to your cheeks knowing who heâs hinting at. Lottie Matthews. Your fellow Yellowjacket teammate, that youâve been dating for about three months now. Your parents didnât have much to offer you when it came to material things, but god knows that they spoiled you in love and acceptance. You play with your spaghetti âI might have seen Lottie at school yes, because we go to the same schoolâ you canât help but be sarcastic at the end of your statement. Your parents share a knowing look between each other, nothing makes them happier than your happiness.
You look to both of them âspeaking of.. so thereâs this trip coach Martinez and coach Ben organised, itâs to some museum about the history of soccerâ you continue mindlessly turning your food around âthe trip is fifty dollarsâ your dad whistles out a breath âthatâs gotta be some museumâ you lay your fork down now âtravel costs includedâ they try to hide it, but you notice that look. They share it every time. You pick your fork up âbut I donât even want to go, Nat and I already said weâll just go to the mall insteadâ taking some of the food into your mouth. Your mum lays her hand over your free one âbaby weâd love for you to go, but-â you swallow your food, the lump in your throat thatâs filled with a guilty feeling of hurt making it harder than youâd like to admit. You stand up from the table âIâm not that hungry at the momentâ your parents nod, excusing you from diner.
When you enter your room you canât help but let a tear slide down your cheek, quickly wiping it away. You knew you shouldnât have brought it up.
The next day you exit your small house Nat already having made her way from her house which was so close you were basically neighbours. She moves closer to you âso? what did they say?â you shake your head âstill up for those mall plans?â she gives you a small smile âof course, I didnât even dare to askâ she lets out a small laugh, trying to hide the fact she was pissed. Nat and you grew up together, even though both your parents hated each other, for completely different reasons. You donât know how often Nat has sneaked out of her home to just have a quiet night at yours. Your parents accepting her with open arms.
On your way to school Nat is trying to finish her cigarette before the first bell goes off. And not all to long after you see her. Your girlfriend, whoâs sporting a new outfit you donât recognise, her line of direction aiming towards you. She throws her arms around your neck giving you a short but powerful kiss making Nat let out a gagging sound. Lottie turns to her with a smirk âjealous that all your lips are touching are a cigarette?â you blow out some air âoh Nat, thereâs no recovering from thatâ Nat waves her hands around âhey ehm, how about you go ehm fuck yourself Lottieâ Lottie laughs while Nat throws the cigarette on the ground crushing it with her boot. Lottie has her attention back on you âdid you ask your parents about the trip?â youâd hoped she wouldnât bring it up, but of course she did. Sheâs Lottie. You shake your head âdidnât get the chanceâ she pouts at you âitâs this friday babeâ you sigh out not wanting to reveal the truth. It was shameful having to admit to your girlfriend that your parents couldnât afford a fifty dollar trip when she can easily get anything at the snap of her fingers.
Nat sees you uncomfortably shift and makes up an excuse âactually, I was thinking, Iâm not gonna be able to afford that shit, maybe you take me to the mall? The museum will be boring anywaysâ her excuse earns a disapproving look from Lottie âwhat? That doesnât feel rightâ she puts a hand on your shoulder simultaneously putting the other on Nats âyou both have to be thereâ the bell interrupts your conversation, Lottie is quick to turn in the direction of the main entrance, Nat shrugs her shoulders at you out of ideas herself. You have to hold yourself back from letting out a verbal groan.
After school itâs no surprise that Lottie turns up at your locker not without pressing a kiss to your cheek âwhat are you doing now?â you put away some books a sarcastic reply yearning to come out âputting away my booksâ she rolls her eyes a smile evident on her lips ânow after schoolâ you turn to her mirroring her smile âNat and I were just gonna hang out at the 7/11â she lets her hand move over your arm making goosebumps appear by the tingling sensation taking your hand in hers âthatâs to bad, I was thinking maybe you would want to come over to my placeâ the look she has in her eyes makes your breath hitch in your throat âI actually hate the 7/11â her smile becomes even brighter than the one she was supporting before. You close up your locker throwing your bag over your shoulder âletâs go!â she laughs softly âdonât you want to let Nat know first?â âsheâll knowâ you tell her grabbing her hand to pull her with you. Nat and you just have a sixed sense when it comes to these things, sheâs ditched on you for Kevyn Tan more than once, and you couldnât care less.
While in Lotties car you fumble with her big collection on cds, because of course her new car that she got for her birthday had a cd player âyou donât even listen to half of this stuff Lottâ her eyes shift to you for just a second âbut you doâ as if it was the most obvious thing for her to buy multiple new cds just because you like them. Youâre planing on burning one for her with songs you two have in common and have let fade into the background when you and her first started feeling something more than a friendship happening between you, shy glances and blushing cheeks when the other caught on.
Lottie and you always had this sort of tension. Whether it was on the field, at school or outside of school. There was always something.
The day the two of you had met your feelings towards her confused the shit out of you. She was the most beautiful girl you had ever seen. Then the way she played at the tryouts, you were captivated. She moved so effortlessly and never missed. Your heart raced and your hands were trembling when the two of you got teamed up to prove your strength in the 7-meters kick. Nat patted your back âgood luck with the princessâ laughing at her own joke. Lottie had turned to you taking a big step to be closer âIâm Lottieâ she introduced herself with a confident smile it faltering a tiny bit when she met your gaze. You were so nervous about that. What was her first impression of you? You had smiled back, it wasnât filled with half the confidence she was radiating âY/nâ you simply told her. Her smile softened a bit âY/n, thatâs a pretty nameâ she let her eyes travel over you âso whatâs your favourite position?â shock paralysed your body, your eyes squinted in confusion, cheeks probably red, when you didnât reply she shrugged âIâm going for centre back or sweeperâ a coldness ran over your back when you realised the direction of her question âsomething in midfieldâ you breath out. Lottie puts her hand on your arm âIâm gonna get us a ballâ running off. She was gone so fast. Nat came up behind you throwing her arm over your shoulder laughing âyou are so hopelessâ âitâs charmingâ you argue back, you both start bickering at each other, so neither one of you noticed the way Lottie had thrown a look over her shoulder towards you. A small smile at the corner of her lips, a feeling of curiosity about who you were.
And from then on Lottie and you were inseparable. If there was a one on one training no one would dare ask one of you to team up with them. At the yellowjackets table in the cafeteria you two would automatically sit next to one another, one time Lottie had to stay behind in class so when she got there she saw you squeezed between Nat and Mari. When she walked over she stood there for a second till Mari caught her directed gaze moving to the side so Lottie could go sit by you, not without mumbling something about you two being gay under her breath. Neither of you caught that already falling into a private conversation, Nat giving your teammates a knowing look.
That day you also had to walk home your mum had to take a shift up and your dad was working overtime. They always took any chance of work hoping it would increase some differences in their bank account. When it started to rain you took your umbrella out, when opening it, it had broken at the first gust of wind. Fucking cheap shit. You threw it into the nearest bin. Your heart started racing once you noticed a car slowing down next to you, you were about to speed up when the window rolls down âneed a ride?â Lottie had looked at you, like she had never looked at anyone before. Usually Lottie would rather be caught dead than let someone get in her car soaking wet. But this was you. You hesitated a bit, but looking at the clouds above you knew the weather was just going to get worse. When you entered you shuttered, the warmth of the car heating up the cold of your body. Lottie moved to the back seat and grabbed a jean jacket for you âwant this?â you had read the label 'Calvin Klein' quickly you had denied it âthank you but Iâll just get it wet, it looks expensiveâ Lottie laughed at that ânot at all, my dad got it for meâ handing it to you âplease, I donât want you catching a coldâ reluctantly you pulled it over your back, and you couldnât deny it did help with warming up. Especially since you already felt warmer when you noticed the jacket smelling of Lotties perfume. Suddenly Lottie allowed herself to lean over your body to get the seatbelt âhere let me, warm up a bitâ your eyes followed her movements as the click of the seatbelt brought you back from your trance. When sheâs back in her seat she grabs her steering wheel âwhere to?â that was the moment you had realised you would have to give her your address. The two of you had never shared a ride home together. It was too late to step out of the car, you would have looked crazy. No reason to make the situation worse than it was going to be you give your address. The car ride was filled with Lottie complaining about some assignment she had to finish, you listened contently with a soft smile as if she wasnât cursing out your teacher. Her rambling cutting off when she neared the entry way of the trailer park home. She had looked around, her face being unreadable. When her eyebrows furrowed you were ready to defend yourself and your neighbourhood when she asked âhow do I get to your house number?â you were baffled you expected a snarky comment or a rude joke, yet that never came from her. She was genuinely just confused by the structure, nothing more. When you explained it to her she smiled shortly after pulling up to your home âsorry, I didnât want to come off stupidâ you let out a laugh ânever in my eyesâ you were about to take her jacket off when she stops you âkeep itâ you didnât want her to give you her jacket just because she thought you couldnât afford it yourself. You took it off, a flash of hurt crossed her eyes âdonât worry, Iâve got a jacket myselfâ she held the jacket playing with the button on it âcan I give it to you after our date tomorrow?â she had asked you with that confident tone which was mixed with a short nervous quiver âyeah sure, whatever Lottsâ you had snapped back actually hearing the sentence she had said before âwait, date tomorrow?â she met your eyes âif youâll let meâ you had nodded so fast your head could have ripped off âhell yeah!â was all you had replied earning that beautiful laugh of hers.
So sometimes, a lot of times, you wonder how you had gotten so lucky. You felt like you were in one of those cheesy coming of age books that Shauna sometimes reads in secret, not wanting to break her mysterious Emily BrontĂŤ aesthetic. The girl from nothing and the girl from everything. Lottie never cared about your financial status, sometimes she would even come over. She loved going to your house, there was such a familiar feeling, your parents would come home, and she was shocked the first time they called you both to diner and it was just the four of you at the diner table eating together, talking. She always wanted that. Someone who truly cares and tries to understand. Your parents never questioned anything, just welcomed her with loving arms. She loved your parents hugs.
You finally arrive infront of her home, she parks her car in the underground garage. Sheâs so fast with her movements, sheâs out of the car faster than you can even unbuckle yourself, the door to your side being pulled open a hand extended to you. Gladly you take it and she helps you out. She points to her lips âpayment for my services pleaseâ you shake your head with a playful smile, but donât hesitate to pull her into a meaningful kiss your hand resting at the back of her neck. She closes the door with her foot, deepening the kiss and for a moment you two lose yourself in each other. The sound of someoneâs car locking makes you pull away shy giggles escaping both your lips. Lottie grabs you by the wrist âletâs go up, my parents wonât be home anywaysâ you donât catch the secret disappointment in her tone. Just happy to finally be somewhere else than school. Plus point for it being with your girlfriend.
When you enter her room you catch the familiar scent of her perfume mixed with fresh washing. You wonder how often her Maid does the bedding for it to always smell fresh. You discard your bag to the side questioning âso what do you want to do?â Lottie doesnât give you a verbal answer, she grabs your face moving her thumbs over your cheeks in a gesture to pull you closer, her soft lips influencing yours in them. She slowly moves you to her bed guiding you down to the mattress letting herself straddle your lap. Her lips move with yours in a passionate motion, the only sound being soft breaths each of you let out once you pull away to catch a second of air. Your hands move under her shirt your fingers enjoying the feeling of her warm skin on them, you let your nails crawl down her back in a lazy manor enjoying the feeling of goosebumps build up just as she had done to you at your locker. You guide her down with you so youâre laying next to each other your lips never breaking apart. Her bed dips down her mattress feeling like a cloud on heaven and youâre ready to be taken. Lottie moves her hand over your back suddenly leaving your lips cold âwhatâs that?â you take a second to even register her question still in a haze from your little make out session. You try to reach behind your back âwhatâs what?â she goes over the little bump on the back of your shirt where you had stitched across yesterday âdid your shirt rip?â you move closer to her trying to distract her âyeah, sucks. back to kissingâ she pushes your upper body back a little âIf you want we can go get you a new shirtâ part of you knows she doesnât mean anything negative by her suggestion, she just wants to get you a new shirt. Lotties first instinct was always to go buy you something as soon as she felt you wanted or needed it. You sit up âI donât need a new shirtâ she moves her arms around your waist âthereâs a noticeable bump on the back of your shirt babe, you should get a new oneâ irritation rises in your chest as you shake your head âI donât mind that, thereâs not always a need for new clothesâ Lottie sits up next to you âI guess, but wouldnât you feel better with a new shirt?â thereâs no thought behind her question, and you understand it comes from a view of privilege, being able to afford new clothes even if they arenât even necessary. Thereâs a short silence till you break it âcan we drop it?â Lottie looks at you with big eyes fighting a pout on her lips âyeahâ silence fills the big room, a silence that hasnât lingered between the two of you before. Usually silence goes hand in hand with comfort when you two are together. Late night embraces, day time embraces. You two hanging out together you doodling away in your notebook and Lottie painting her nails. Now it feels tight. Not one of you knowing how to continue.
The shirt starts feeling warm on you, it feels like itâs a sign of your status, so you slip it off your body laying it to the side. Lottie watches you a slight tilt of her head in confusion. She doesnât get why you reacted so strongly towards her wanting to help out. She knows your parents donât have the option of spending money as they please. Her mind leads her to her next question, maybe she shouldnât ask, but she canât help herself âare you going on the trip?â you know that she connected the dots, that you lied to her earlier âno Lott, my parents wonât be able to afford it this monthâ now her lips turn into that little frown you find cute, but hurts you in your guts âwhy didnât you say anything? I can pay for the tripâ your eyebrows furrow deeply at her offer, the usage of her naming the money of her parents as her money, the way she can just so nonchalantly decide to throw away fifty dollars âLottie can you even imagine how shitty that would be for my parents if my girlfriend payed for a filedtrip?â her eyes meet yours as if that was the first time she ever let her mind open up to that fact, you sigh your hands moving over your face âno you probably canâtâ âwhat does that mean?â she asks offended, crossing her arms âit means if you need money your parents donât even question what for, you need a new shirt? You go and you get a new shirt, if you spent a hundred dollars on a fifty dollar field trip they wouldnât even question itâ she shifts trying to control her emotions, her mind playing tricks on her âyouâre selfishâ she lets out towards you, catching you off guard âselfish? Are you for real?â âYou think having everything handed to me no questions asked is a privledge, I would love for my parents for once to take an interest in why I want something, why I need somethingâ you want to interrupt, but she continues on âyou know why they never question those things? because that would mean actually having to talk to me, to take interest, to parent. You come home and you spend time with your parents. I donât even feel a difference of coming home to them or to an empty house. The last time they asked me, the last time I was asked how my day was-â she stops actually having to recall the last time that question has been asked towards her â-was when Iâve been to your houseâ she stops, she knows ever since she started hearing things, imagining things as they liked to put it, sheâs been nothing but a burden to them. That was all she was. A burden. She wanted to continue on, but if she would, she thinks her body would cave in on itself.
You stand up, your body feels hot. You donât think youâve ever been so mad towards people youâve never met. And hearing Lottie say these things to you for the first time. Opening up to such an extent, you realise that maybe the reason youâve never met the Matthews wasnât because Lottie didnât want them to know, it was just that they werenât bothered to know such intimate details of their daughters life. You both were so used to your lifestyles, your family situations that you both craved some of the things the other had taken for granted or werenât even aware of because itâs all either of you had ever known. You turn away your body facing her door not wanting Lottie to notice how angry you had actually gotten. âAre you gonna leave me now?â Lottie murmurs into the quiet room, her eyes now not being able to hide the tears that were building up. Her broken tone makes you turn back quickly âwhat? Lottie of course notâ she looks up âIt feels that wayâ you calm yourself down, right now comforting her becoming your priority, you go near her with caution. Sheâs deep in thought as you sit down next to her. Sheâs fidgeting with her hands, so slowly you place yours over hers âIâm not leaving Lottâ she looks up her eyes unsure, you move some hair out of her way wiping away an escaped tear âIâm sorry, I didnât mean for it to escalate like that, I guess I just felt.. like a charity caseâ Lottie shakes her head still letting your hand rest on her cheek, her eyes wide âyouâre not a charity case in my eyes, I donât care about money you do or donât haveâ you believe her when she tells you this, her eyes never leaving yours âI just enjoy spoiling you, you deserve that and more, itâs just the main way Iâve been shown loveâ that last sentence takes you by surprise and by the look on her face she seems to be surprised as well. Your hands falls from her cheek landing on her hand which was resting by her side âyou?â she lets her fingers intertwine with yours âof course I love youâ the beating of your heart is overwhelming, you actually have to go through the symptoms of a heart attack to make sure that wasnât what was happening right now.
The argument from before fades away. The silence comforting again, you donât waste a second when pulling her into a soft kiss before pulling away letting another one rest on her cheek, and with your face so close to her ear you let her know âI love you tooâ her head tilts, her eyes shining now with a whole other emotion than the saddened tears from just a moment ago âyou love me?â You nod a smile creeping up on your lips, a gentle gaze on your face âhow could I not?â without a warning youâre embraced by a forceful hug, Lottie has a lot of force, so of course she knocks you down on the bed, now youâre tangled together. You whisper to her âyou donât have to be alone anymore Lott, you have me.â
You both have differences in your experiences of growing up. But both of you were ready to build your own experiences growing together.
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Untold Stories
Pairing: Van Palmer x fem!reader
Summary: Van and you have been dating for almost a year. Things are going good, so good that shes already meet your young daughter. Just sometimes the past throws her back.
Van loves you. So much she canât help but close the register up, quickly grabbing her bag and closing the door a bit to hard, turning the sign from open to close with excitement.
Pulling her car up in your driveway she can already see little eyes peaking out of the front window. She canât help a smile creeping up on her face. When stepping out the car the front door is pushed open a little version of the woman sheâs more than fond off running up to her âVan!â her sweet voice rings through the yard running into her arms. With no hesitation she picks her up âhey sweetheart, whereâs your mama?â You quickly hurry out the door as well your arms playfully crossed âyou know I never get this treatment from herâ Van laughs out resting your daughter on her hip âwell Iâm just more than amazing, and she knows my valueâ you wrap your arms around her neck âI value you as much as I canâ giving her a playful grin kissing her cheek. Your daughter was about to protest when youâre fast to give her a kiss on her cheek.
Van hands you the little girl over and you smile at her thankfully âletâs get you insideâ you lead her inside setting down your daughter. She goes off somewhere to play so finally you have a moment alone with your girlfriend. You wrap your arms around her waist pulling her into a deep kiss, Van making a cheeky comment âthatâs the stuff babyâ you laugh pushing her away âcome on I made foodâ she whispers into your ear âis desert included?â âVan!â You hit her shoulder as she passes you to sit down at the table.
Your daughter runs in and you softly warn her âno running in the house sweetieâ she stops in her tracks throwing her head back âsorry mamaâ Van carefully watches your daughter as she starts climbing into her chair playing with a doll. It always amazed her how⌠non reactive your daughter was to you telling her off. She sometimes wonders what that would have felt like as a child herself.
She remembers the first times she meet your daughter; she didnât remember the last time she was truly that nervous and deeply terrified. She didnât know shit about kids. She never was able to be a kid herself. You constantly reassured her saying just to act herself and your daughter will love her. So when she stood infront of your door it took her a minute to knock. Flattening the shirt she had put on. It was the cleanest one she owned.
All the nervousness and terror left her body once she saw you. Her eyes moved down to a little girl who looked exactly like you hiding behind your leg. She bent down to meet her eyes not without throwing a quick look up to you smiling with confidence after you gave her an approving nod. She stuck out her hand to your daughter who turned curious. Your daughter put her hand to Vans who shook it softly âyou must be the famous young lady your Mums always talking aboutâ she giggles âmamas talks a lot about youâ you laugh still feeling a rush of embarrassment âvery true babyâ you still confirm, Van stood back up âso whatâs on the agenda?â your daughter took both your hands into her little ones âweâre baking cake!â Van felt very surprised while being pulled by a strong force, you laughed out âI guess weâre baking a cake.â
So while the three of you were baking, there was music playing that Van would never even consider turning on, but seeing you and your daughter messily singing along she didnât care. Then suddenly there was a splatter. And the carton that was carrying six eggs was scattered across the floor, each egg broken. Van looked up, that familiar feeling of anxiety filling her body. She looked to you who was looking at the floor. Your daughter covered her eyes to avoid seeing the mess. Only the music filling the air. You turned to your daughter exaggerating a look of shook âoh ohâ you let out, your daughter lifted her little hands up mirroring your movement âoh ohâ she repeated your words, you put your hands on your hips âwhat do we do now?â your daughter didnât even hesitate and ripped off some paper towels âwe have to clean the mess up!â you clapped your hands together âthat is an amazing idea sweetie, do you need help?â your daughter shook her head âIâve got it mamaâ Van watched as you lifted the little girl down from her high chair, softly setting her down. Your daughter wiped up the mess in a well- more messy way. And Van caught you watching her fondly. When your eyes meet hers they turned from fondness to worry, moving closer to her âyou okay Van?â she had to shake herself back to reality âuhm yeah, just wowâ your face turned confused, she moved her hand through her hair shaking her head with a smile âyou two have a beautiful relationshipâ you noticed a sadness behind her tone and definitely knew there was more to her reaction than she had lead on, but you wouldnât push her. She'd open up about it at her own time.
You set down plates for both of them, yourself included. Van snapped back to the present, pushing the memory back for now. Your daughter perks up âsince we have a guest, does that mean I can drink a sweet drink today?â you squint your eyes at her, hers shining back at you with hope âfine.â She cheers out loud making Van flinch slightly, which goes unnoticed by you since youâre already grabbing a bottle of soda out of the fridge. You fill your daughterâs cup up, and while youâre at it you also fill up Van's glas âdonât worry Iâve got wine for laterâ you let her know quietly.
After diner you wash up the plates, denying any offer of help from Van. She sits at the counter watching you closely. You look over your shoulder smiling at her âtake a picture itâll last longerâ Van pulls out her phone not a second to late âdonât mind if I doâ snapping a picture of you, at that you throw some water her direction. Making her jump from her spot of the counter, hastily moving over to you and influencing you in a hug from behind kissing your neck with little pecks that tickle through your body making you laugh out loud âstop Iâve got soap handsâ âI love thatâ âI love youâ you reply making her stop her antics looking longingly at you âand I love youâ for a moment you just look at each other, the moment being interrupted by your daughter âmama its bed timeâ you look at the clock at the wall and back down to her âyouâre not wrong, but-â your daughter shows off her teeth to you both âbrushedâ turning to head to her room, you call after her âwho has been raising you?â You turn to Van âmy boss is callingâ you kiss her cheek âwines in the fridge, make yourself comfortable on the couch.â Van prepares the wine glasses and sets them on the table infront of the couch.
Not being able to help herself when it takes a while for you to get back. She sneaks towards the sound of your voice, it leads her to the slightly leaned open door to your daughters room you softly reading to her âand the big bad wolf swallows the grandma whole in one big biteâ Van stumbles back a little hitting the edge of a bookcase making some books fall over. The sound doesnât go unnoticed by you and after quickly making sure your daughter was sound asleep you tuck her in, then quietly leaving the room.
Van is sitting on the couch taking a big sip of the wine you'd gotten for the two of you. Her hands slightly shaking. You move over in caution âVan, honey are you okay?â She looks up shaking her head, wanting it to be in reassurance that she was fine, but she wasnât. And who was she to convince you she was. You sit down laying a hand on her knee âwhat happened?â images of the wolves, those fucking wolves, flash in her mind. She sets the glass down moving her hand in an attempt of finding a way to explain without completely scaring you off. You grab her hand squeezing it in yours âis it too much?â now itâs her turn to be confused âwhat?â you squeeze her hand again âis this, her, me having a daughter to much for you? Was it too fast?â Van snaps out of her mind, shaking her head âno not at allâ your face doesnât seem convinced, she notices that.
After a long exhale she starts âmy scarsâ youâve never mentioned them, they seemed like a story thatâs meant for her to bring up some day âI told you about the plane crash I was in as a teenager?â you nod your head not daring to interrupt her âwe were so naiveâ letting out a shaky breath âwe thought we could hike our way to safety, just walk through the wildernessâ she exhales a laugh out of her nose clasping her hands together âI could tell you all the gory detailsâ she looks at you âit all happened fast, not fast enough- I was attacked by wolves one nightâ a little gasp escapes your mouth. You knew about the crash. You knew it couldnât have been easy. They were lost for so long too. But your mind never took you to a place where you imagined that her scars could be from something so horrible. Van goes through her hair âso yeah.â
Thereâs silence. Until you think back to before.
Your hand moves to your mouth âthe storyâ Van looks to you, trying to study your reaction. You want to move your hands to her retreating before your touch could reach her âIâm so sorryâ Van shakes her head moving her hands to you âno, please, donât beâ she waits âunless you like trained wilderness wolves to attack me around 1996â your face scrunches up, she laughs awkwardly âsorry coping mechanismâ you allow yourself to smile âyouâre weird you know that?â âYou love itâ you move your hands to her face tracing her scars âI do, so muchâ Van's eyes soften and she closes them allowing herself to feel your touch across the scars that have caused her to have a permanent reminder of those times in the wilderness. You let your hand cup her cheek âare you going to be okay?â âYeah, sometimes things just- come flashing backâ you nod, never being able to understand just the extent of what flashes she was referring to.
She leans back on the couch âdid I ruin the night?â you lean forward grabbing her glass of wine âdo you want it to be ruined?â she lets a smile spread across her face âanything but thatâ with that you hand over her glass, and prepare one for yourself leaning back into her. She lets her head rest in the crook of your neck actually letting herself feel comfortable. Comforted.
You never asked about her time in the wilderness. You were okay with the small details she would open up to you about. Even when it came to her life before the crash. You can feel the guilt she carries, the traumas she must have faced and still carries with her. You take it conversation for conversation with her. And of course youâre curious, itâs the life of the woman you love, but youâre never worried about what kind of things she could tell you. It couldnât be worse than her near death experiences, right?.
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Inhale/Exhale
Pairing: Nat Scatorccio x fem!reader
Summary: While itâs obvious to you and obvious to your teammates that you like Nat, it seems sheâs the only one who doesnât know. But maybe it just seems that way.
Warning: smoking, mentioned injury, cursing
Youâve always admired her. The way she acted so chill about everything, but stuttered over her own words as soon as she got slightly flustered or frustrated. The way her temper could snap so easily, but the frightened look in her eyes gave away the hint of hurt in her voice while she seemed angry to the people around her, youâve always wondered why she reacted so strongly when people (especially your teammates or coach Ben) got loud with her.
Her style, her taste in music, the way she leaned against the bleachers while secretly having a quick cigarette before practice. It was always obvious, because anytime you passed her by you couldn't help but notice the smell of smoke mixed with the perfume she douched herself in so no one could suspect her, of course maybe just you would notice that. Because more than admiration thereâs no denying the way your breath hitched in your throat when she looked at you and god forbid she'd send you a smile, because you swear it made your head spin for a few seconds.
This had not gone unnoticed by your teammates, much less by your best friends Tai and Van. Tai and Van who were already so deep inlove they canât even remember what it means to have a hopeless crush. And you were sure it was hopeless. Nat refused to take a hint even though you'd try your best attempts at flirting, though clumsy, it was solid. And your teammates had tried to push you together, be it Jackie teaming you up in group warm ups, Misty making (forcing) you both into the small storage room to help her carry equipment back or even Van saying quote "you two remind me of us". Nat didnât seem to notice, or she had, and was uncomfortable and just didnât know how to say it.
Thatâs the worst thought that lingered in your head.
Then sometimes her hand lingered on yours while you put away the agility ladder. And sometimes you would catch her staring at you, then before you could meet her eyes sheâd already be looking away again, but you didnât and you knew she was aware of it. She shared classes with Tai and Van, so you knew where her classes were, yet sometimes she took the longer way that passed your locker and each time she let out a casual "Hey Y/nâ like it was not the most important part of your day. You wondered if she did it on purpose.
Youâve confessed once. Well almost. Kinda. It was at a party in the woods before nationals. Nat was standing with Lottie smoking a cigarette. So when you stepped over to them, both looked at you confused "you smoke?" Nats question caught you by surprise, you'd stupidly reply "obviously, yeah" Lottie let out a small laugh, knowing you were totally bullshitting, she stuck out her pack "take one of mine" you gave her a pointed look, smiling sharply "thanks Lott" she threw hers on the ground making up some excuse about having to fill up her cup which was already filled to the brink. Nat patted her pockets sighing "hope you have a lighter, I think Lottie stole mine" silently thankful you took the cigarette out of your mouth "I donât, damn" Nat seemed hesitant, just for a moment, before she reached for your arm pulling you towards her, your eyes wide as ever. She moved your hand which was still clutching the cigarette between your fingers to your mouth, automatically you wrapped your lips back around it. Leaning forward she lit up your cigarette using the tip of her already lit one.
Your heart was beating hard! And you werenât sure if it was the situation or the sudden rush of nicotine hitting your head. Not as bad as you thought. Just as that thought went by a sudden pressure rose in your lungs and you couldnât help but cough. Nat instantly turned worried "you good?" her brown eyes looking over you. You cough into your hand "y-yeah, not used to Lotties stuff" Nat laughed at that, you made her laugh. She took another long drag of her cigarette, a suspicious look across her features "you sure youâre a smoker?" "am I a smoker? What a funny question, now why would I be standing here, smoking, if I werenât a smoker?â to prove your point you took the cigarette to your lips again, taking a drag, that time preparing for the hit on your lungs. That time not expecting the smoke to hit your eye though. It started tearing up and burning "shitâ you mumbled out covering your eye with the palm of your hand. Nat couldnât help herself laughing, moving over to remove your hand "youâll be fine. It happens, but you shouldnât start smoking, itâs not good for you" her statement seemed so genuine, like she actually wanted you to take her advice. She wiped away one of the tears that escaped your eye "but I get curiosity can- well, quite literally kill the catâ she chuckled at her little joke, seemingly proud of herself for that one. A pure look in her eyes that you could miss in the blink of an moment. She threw the cigarette on the floor for you putting light pressure on it with her shoe "enough of that one, it might end you and I wouldnât want thatâ your eyes meet, different emotions across both your face "would suck to lose one of our best defensesâ Nat noticed the look of hurt flash across your face, she always did "why did you come out here?" she questioned obviously wondering why youâd react that way. That was the moment, put all the cards on the table moment. With a deep breath you finally felt confident "the truth is, I like you" the loud sound of a very drunk Taissa calling out "Yo Y/N! we gotta get going or my moms gonna lock us outâ You were gonna slap her. You were gonna make Van make her sleep on the couch that night. You looked to Nat who was looking back at you "what did you say was the reason?" she didnât hear you "I like trying new things, thatâs what I saidâ she shrugged her shoulders at that "thatâs cool.â Lighting another one "you should head back to Taiâ "I should" you agreed, feeling more than bummed out. You didnât see Nat leaning against the tree, watching you walk away. Her heart pounding, did you say you like her?.
So maybe you were blind. And maybe she liked you back just as much. She would never admit it. And sheâd been having a hard time deciding if you had actually confessed your feelings for her and if you did, did you mean it? Or was the alcohol just making you talk nonsense?
Days have passed since then. Youâre getting ready for nationals. You promised Tai and Van youâd confess your feelings IF your team was to win. You knew you were going to win.
You entered the plane that day. And the seat next to Nat had been left open for you, of course. You sat down next to her, for once not noticing the lingering look she pointed your way.
And as the plane was crashing. You grabbed Nat's hand. What did you have to lose? You looked at her. Just as youâve always done. She was looking back at you. And even with the oxygen mask on you werenât able stop some of the smoke of the plane fumes getting in and hitting your lungs just slightly. You thought back to the moment where Nat lit that cigarette for you.
âŚ.
Now. You donât even know how much time has really passed. So many people hurt⌠if not dead. You clutch your arm which was dislocated in the crash, the pain of Misty pulling it back into place still stinging in your memory. And the worst part is, even with all the pain, the cold nights and the chore filled days. You still sit around pining after Natalie. The way she handles that shotgun, youâd lie if you said it wasnât hot.
Boiling some water you feel a soft tad on your thigh. Looking up you see Nat looking down at you with a small smile, an uneasy one âwant to go hunting with me?â usually her and Travis would go together, which you canât deny made you jealous. Which also may have lead to you becoming a bit distant. You just nod your head accepting her hand which she held out to help you up, the wince you let out not going unnoticed by her.
While walking you break the silence trying to lighten the mood âI wonât be lots of help you knowâ motioning to your arm which was held up by a make shift sling made out of one of Taissas hoodies. Her hands behind her back, clasped together she looks at everything but you. Usually she would let out some sarcastic remark. Usually you wouldnât be stranded in the middle of some wilderness. You lay a supporting hand on her shoulder, making her jump a little, quickly pulling back you apologise âIâm sorryâ âdonât be, I didnât mean toâ âitâs okay Nat, reallyâ she sighs visibly getting frustrated at something, curiosity takes over you âNat whatâs wrong?â a scoff leaves her mouth at your question âwhatâs wrong? Whatâs wrong is that we fucking were in a plane crash. A plane crash where you decided to grab my hand. And now what? We survived and Iâm being ignored by you? The hell Y/N?â taken aback by this whole situation becoming a confrontation thereâs no reply that seems fit, so she just continues âis it the hunting? Like are you grossed out by me using a gun? Like- like what the hell? Or was back home just you wanting to hook up, play the long game and then pissing off? but here shit would be to complicated. I actually thought-â not knowing what you are doing, just knowing this could become a big regret and awkward as heck if you misread the situation you pull her in moving you lips together with hers, her body slams against yours and you want to cry out because of the pain, but your body and mind feel numb from the way she kisses you back with a passion you canât place. Air once again becoming a necessity you pull away, her eyes meeting yours instantly â-thought you liked meâ she finishes her sentence in an almost whisper like tone. Moving her tussled hair out of her face and over her ear thereâs just silence between us. Comfortable silence. The first time feeling comfortable since landing here. A tear slowly escapes her eye, you wipe it away letting your hand rest on her cheek âI thought we were going to dieâ her voice raspy from the tears sheâs holding back âme tooâ you admit. There was no denying the fear you felt in that moment. You let you hand move down to her hand taking it with so much care, moving it to your lips and pressing it against them âI was scared I was going to die, and all I wanted to do in that moment was take your hand. Because I like you Nat, I like you a lot, I have liked you for a long time, and I hate myself for waiting so long to tell you, because I would have really hated dying without telling youâ she actually lets out a little laugh at my last sentence âthat would have sucked. Yeahâ kicking the dirt âthen why ignore me?â you avoid looking at her, but do admit âI just saw Travis and you and assumed maybe I was to lateâ she shakes her head giving you that dead pan look of hers âwhy because Tai thinks Iâm some skank that sleeps with everyone?â âWhat? No no, what? Nat you have to know I donât think that at all, and even if you were I wouldnât care, I mean I would! Because I donât want you sleeping with anyone but me.. not that I want to sleep with you!.. wait that sounds-" and there it is again, that laugh of hers which tells you sheâs fucking messing with you âyouâre evil, truly vileâ you point at her to which she pulls you to her giving you a kiss âI know, but that was nice, what you saidâ âI mean it Nat, thereâs no doubt about itâ sheâs now the one to move her hand to you cheek, giving you another small kiss. That small kiss leads to a series of small kisses until the two of you are sitting against some tree log sharing a conversation about what the hell you were going to say when you get back to the othersâŚ
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â¨Masterlistâ¨
Yellowjackets đ
Open for requests!
Shauna Shipman
Jackie Taylor
Natalie Scatorccio
Inhale/Exhale
A life together ~coming soon~
Lottie Matthews
Silver spoon
Van Palmer
Untold stories
Mari Ibarra
#yellowjackets masterlist#yellowjackets fanfic#Shauna Shipman x reader#Jackie Taylor x reader#Nat Scatorccio x reader#Lottie Matthews x reader#Van Palmer x reader
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