wshaeil

[wshaeil]

𝐀𝐒𝐇 :​:

It still felt odd to appear on a variety show without the entire group. He had a tendency to sit in the back and speak only when necessary. After all, the advantage of being part of a large group was that silence barely had any room to materialize. However, “After Mom Is Asleep” rewarded silence and having less members to share expensive beef with was something he could relish. He had situated himself next to Haeil, happily following the instructions given to him with (somewhat) restrained energy. 

While he had felt optimistic at the beginning of the recording, his luck had ran out as soon as the utensils were needed. The box was full of unnecessary utensils that were bound to make noise when he rummaged through it. He had held his breath throughout the task, pushing the metal tongs to the side and raising the noise decibels when it clunked against the box. He releases a soft noise of shock when he heard the actor speak, suppressing a chuckle with the collar of his shirt. 

He lifted out the pairs of chopsticks wrapped together and handed it over to Haeil before reaching under the table for his penalty. He threw on the unruly red wig reminiscent of Chucky, pressing his lips together to keep himself from laughing. The wig paired wonderfully with his previous penalty of bright red blush that he smeared over his cheeks. He lifted a hand to smooth down the wig, turning to capture the attention of his leader. “Am I pretty yet, hyung?”

𝐒𝐎 . . . 𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐈𝐋 𝐈𝐒𝐍'𝐓 the best at variety shows. he probably could be if he wanted to , but . . . it’s easier if he isn’t. because whenever phoenix gets to star on a show , he has a wide array of tasks to complete in the background of it all. check up on quieter members to make sure they’re heard , gently remind the more chaotic members when they should settle down , and of course , ensure no one slipped up and said something that could get them in trouble. because of these tasks which have nearly become second nature , he has little time to ensure what he has to contribute will be thumbnail - worthy.

but today . . . he can’t stop laughing. because next to him sits his self-proclaimed baby , even if ash would groan if he heard him say it. he’s glad to be paired with him , as ash brings out a light in haeil not many can. everybody - and he means everybody - in phoenix had their special thing that made them special amongst the boys in haeil’s eyes. perhaps unsurprisingly , ash was held dear to his heart by the paradoxical bond they shared as maknae and leader.  so when he looks over to see ash , red wig and all , he lets out the most raw , genuine laughter of amusement , only to immediately regret his volume.

mere seconds later , his meticulously combed hair is turned wild as he stuffs a sunflower hat on his head. “ i’m sorry , but with the wig , and the utensils , and makeup - you looked like ariel from the little mermaid , ash ! ” the man’s explanation now comes off as a just barely audible whisper , trying to suppress the many tiny giggles threatening to come out. he might have the cool and collected exterior , but on the inside , he’d always be an immature boy.

“ okay , okay , i’m going to focus now. so i’m gonna start by making some . . . rice balls ? ” nice and simple.  “ but first i need gloves. hm - ” looking over ash , he spots some disposable gloves that are bound to make some noise. deviously , he turns back to ash , lightly poking him. “ hey , ariel , can you do me a favor and get me two gloves from out of there ? you know , it’s good manners to do things for those older than you ! ” the phrase is obviously mocking , as there’s very few times haeil uses his age as an advantage over the other. but it’s a calculated risk that will hopefully result in an entertaining penalty , much to the eldest’s amusement. “ come on , ariel , we don’t have all day ! ” 

[wshaeil]

𝐊𝐈𝐇𝐀 ​::

. . . kiha knocks on the foor out of courtesy more than anything else, knows that haeil has probably heard him coming all the way from his room anyway. “haeil hyung?” kiha opens the door just enough so he can slip his head in. “i can’t sleep.” he whines softly, can’t help the small pout on his lips when he speaks, not adding anything more because the question of if he can come in, if he can join haeil is quietly there in between the lines.

𝐎𝐊𝐀𝐘, 𝐒𝐎 𝐌𝐀𝐘𝐁𝐄 haeil is a little easier on kiha than the other boys sometimes. but in everything haeil does he intends to be fair , so with great power comes great responsibility. in this way , haeil leans on kiha for support in phoenix more than he allows himself to with most the other boys, for fear of looking weak or unreliable. but whether it was for his naturally kind aura , similarly nurturing demeanor, or maybe the friendship that had so naturally blossomed between the two , kiha just held a special place in haeil’s spot that made it harder for him to say no.

so that’s why when kiha finds his way in front of his door , haeil doesn’t even think of complaining in fact , he doesn’t even flinch , as it’s become nearly routine for them to be night owls , talking until their eyelids finally grow heavy. haeil’s eyes , puffy with lack of sleep , peer at kiha’s. his  familiar , dimpled smile makes his way onto his cheeks as he wordlessly motions kiha to come in - but not before a big hug. “ hey , that’s what i’m here for ! we can hang out for as long as you need , okay ? my body’s sleepy , but my mind is still up , so it won’t let myself go to sleep. i get it. ” tossing and turning was doing haeil no good either , and he figured it’d be a much smarter investment of time to just talk the restlessness away , rather than try to force himself to sleep for another few hours.

“ you know, you’re actually right on time ! i was thinking of doing one of those . . . what do they call them . late night talks ? like a little v-live before i sleep , you know ? ” as he talks, the man subconsciously tidies his bed up a bit before laying on top of it , leaving a generous amount of space for kiha to lay. “ you can be in it , if you want ! all the other boys are sleep - surprisingly - so it’ll probably just be us , if you wanna join ! but if not , that’s fine - ” without warning, he pulls kiha to the bed , attacking him in a firm hug , followed with the sound of quiet laughter. “ you can always just be my silent cuddle buddy , i don’t mind ! ”

[wshaeil]

I FINISHED SCHOOLLL so i can finally focus on having fun w you all here thank godness !! i do work today booo buuut i will be a lot more active and back into the swing of things moving forward !! thank you SO  MUCH for being patient w me <333

[wshaeil]

𝐃𝐀𝐄 ::

. .  . “Do you want to try something else? Hey! Why don’t you let me treat you today? Let’s order some food too. And I know, I know, you’re prepping for a comeback, but just consider it a cheat day,” Dae shoots him a wink before reaching for the menu at their side. As if on cue, a server appears to wipe down a neighboring table, actively avoiding Dae’s eyes. Without hesitation, he tugs at the server’s elbow, speaking casually. “You gonna take our orders or what?”

*  ◟ —  𝐀 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐗. oh haeil swears that dae is a living, breathing paradox. because for every moment he stares at the male , almost jealous of the cool exterior he exudes, something leaves his mouth that makes haeil’s perception of him take ten steps backwards. who is he ? haeil’s still in a state of shock from his mere existence. because despite not knowing too much about him , everything he does know has him in a dazed sense of confusion. but the second dae starts revealing information about he and harin’s relationship with each other, he leans so far forward he swears he’s about to fall out of his chair. this was it. something had to be going on , after all . . . right ? all he needed was verbal confirmation , and he’d give dae the most cliché older brother threat of his life.

“ i knew it ! i knew you were - wait , friends ? ” haeil can’t hind his shock as wide eyes peer across the table to dae, who ( unfortunately ) doesn’t seem too phased by haeil’s “ tough guy ” act. all haeil can do is stare , mouth agape , hoping he hasn’t made an irreversible fool out of himself. despite wanting to be mad , there’s a certain charm the other has which ends up making haeil feel more docile than hostile.

 “ . . . so - so there’s nothing going on ? really ? ” he’s both stressed and relieved, and prays to god that word won’t get to harin about him being overprotective . . . yet again. haeil’s seemed to literally deflate as he realizes the whole day has been an absolute waste - unless , maybe it wasn’t. free food ? despite the embarrassment he was facing right now, his declining bank account balance and growling stomach wasn’t going to argue with that.

but again, dae takes him by surprise with the overly casual nature he treats the restaurant employees with. watching the male grab the server’s elbow has his eyes widen with horror, bringing his hands up to tug at dae’s own arm. who raised him ? “ hey , dude, are you cra - ” honorifics , haeil. chill. he’s older than you. “ i mean . . . please ,  can you be polite ? ” an apologetic smile to the waiter is followed by a more stern scowl to dae. it’s the same one his mom used on him when he acted up as a kid, and the same one he learned to use with phoenix. silent, but saying a million things at once. “ why are you acting like you own the place , or something ? we’re gonna get kicked out ! ”

[wshaeil]

26!

⎯⎯ what’s your favorite way to spend the day off ?  ( also asked by @wsyohan ! )

“ ooh, this is a good one. you know, i’m really not that picky ? even sitting in bed, drinking tea and catching up on a show i like sounds like a really good time. but at the same time, i feel my best when i’m doing something productive. so i think ideally, it’d be something that mixes both . . . productivity and relaxation. so probably . . . taking a dance class for fun in my spare time ! i love learning choreography to songs i like , and even though i’m improving my skills and getting better , it’s still really fun because i love dancing so much. i think i’d love to learn alongside some of my friends , then go to a cafe to wind down and try out as many pastries as i wanted. that would be the best use of my time ! ”

[wshaeil]

HAIL. Phoenix Firebirds EP 05.28.2021

[wshaeil]

4 / 19

— what is your most embarrassing moment?

answered here !

— what is your perfect idea of success?

( also asked by @ws-fabrice ! )

“ my idea of success is pretty simple, actually. it’s just . . . happiness. i want to be at the point where the happiness brought to me by the things i have achieved on my bucket list outweighs the happiness of the things i haven’t achieved. so it’s not that i want to do everything i have a desire to do, just enough to make me feel fulfilled. but i’d love to own my own house someday and have a family with really cute kids. even better , with phoenix still close , and we all visit each other and make sure our kids are close ! that would be the life. ” 

[wshaeil]

24

— what has been the highlight of your time with your group?

“ this is gonna come off as cheesy , but really , i think anything i could’ve said would be.  anywho , the highlight for me has been seeing us grow up. i’m honestly kind of a sentimental person , so maybe i notice it more. but seeing how little we looked back in the day honestly makes me even prouder of who we are now. we haven’t been in the industry a super long time , but still. sometimes when we’re all eating a meal together i just sort of look around the table and . . . almost get emotional ? just . . . seeing everyone with different styles they’ve developed , the close bond i’ve been able to create with al the phoenix kids , and all that we’ve had to overcome to get here. i think the simplest moments like  sitting and enjoying each other’s company is what makes me happiest. ”  

[wshaeil]

Has there ever been a moment where you’ve been frustrated with your group?

“ oh , yes. i’m actually pretty level - headed though , so i’m not the super commanding leader some people might expect. but it can be frustrating to me when my members take that kindness for weakness and goof off when we don’t need to. i think when it comes to work - and being an idol is our job - there’s some times you’ve just gotta be mature and take things seriously, especially performances. i think it frustrates me the most because when i choose productivity over fun , i expect that same level of respect from the others , so if they don’t give it to me i can get pretty upset . . . admittedly too much, sometimes. but i’m working on it ! really , though, the members rarely ever give me enough stress to be truly frustrated. it’s just not worth it to get angry over little things. ”

[wshaeil]

definitely me to my hypothetical children

[wshaeil]

27. What are the words that you’d like to hear right now? And from whom?

( also asked by @seoyulws ! )

“ i’d like to hear i’m proud of you. from . . . myself. i do enjoy compliments from other people , and they do help me to an extent. but rarely do i ever feel proud enough of myself to share the feelings the people around me have for me. and i think the biggest struggle i have is  my own conscious ? so it’d be good to not be in a constant battle with myself , you know ? to just . . . live without constantly getting plagued by my thoughts. ”

[wshaeil]

𝐄𝐗𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄.𝐌𝐏𝟑

*  ◟ — " 𝐓𝐇𝐄 . . . 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑 . . . 𝐁𝐎𝐗. ”  with the aid of his glasses , the male slowly reads the english sign that sits atop a square building , a modern cafe of sorts , with new customers floating in and our. in the middle of them stood oh haeil and seo eunbyul. the typically stable man is clearly self conscious, seemingly becoming smaller as he scratches his neck , turning in her direction. “ that’s how it’s pronounced . . . right ? ” 

haeil was , in most things, fairly comfortable in his own skills. but english was . . . a whole other playing field. a field he didn’t even want to particularly be on , but knew there was no stepping off of , given his membership in a group which was expected to tour internationally. whether he liked it or not , he needed to learn english. and today ? he was forcing himself onto first base. haeil is smart , but the kind of smart that was constantly affirmed into thinking he was so , until he no longer had a desire to learn things of difficulty for himself. english was . . . everything he dreaded , the sort of skill that couldn’t just be naturally acquired. the type that would have to be practiced , practiced , practiced.

but here he was , in a place where he’d have to face his fears for once and for all. eunbyul has been his honorary english tutor for a bit , and until now , things have been going pretty smooth. after all , it's always easier to learn a language from a friend rather than books. but today was a whole new level - a language exchange cafe that both foreigners and koreans frequented , hoping to get better at speaking in their second languages. pulling up his mask , he turns to the familiar girl. “ you don’t think they’ll recognize us , right ? the last thing i want is a ruby recognizing me and talking about how much i suck at speaking english. ”

@wseunbyul​

[wshaeil]

5

— who is your inspiration ?

“ can i break this down into three categories ? okay, so we’re going to split it into performance inspiration, lifestyle inspiration, and musical inspiration. my performance inspiration is michael jackson , because well , need i say more ? not that i think i have the potential to be him or anything , but i hope to gain even an ounce of the versatility he had in terms of perfecting so many different genre’s performance styles. lifestyle-wise i say . . . my sister , harin ! and i say that because . . . sometimes i feel like the youngest , because she just lives with such certainty , and possesses a certain sense of grace and stability ? i really admire her for that. and musically, i’d say . . . zion.t ? i think he perfectly blends what i want to develop in my own sound when i eventually create music - a bit of fun personality , vulnerable lyrics , and a good beat ! ”

[wshaeil]

Is there a moment you wanted to quit or thought about giving up?

“ all. the. damn. time. i mean that’s human though, right ? i think the majority of us who’ve wound up in this industry have thought about what it’d be like to just leave it once and for all , so i don’t think i’m alone in that sentiment. but i definitely do probably think of it more than the average person. it still doesn’t make sense that i’m in phoenix to me , so if it feels like that after three years then . . . will it ever feel like i belong, y’know ? don’t get me wrong, i love phoenix - i never had been as happy as i have been since being with them. but it can be a lot to feel like a group’s fate is in your hands , and your hands alone , even if it’s not entirely true. and sometimes . . . it just feels like they’d be better without me , or at least with someone else instead of me as leader. does that make sense ? ”

[wshaeil]

4!

— what is your most embarrassing moment? ( also asked by @wsjordan & @seoljiws ! )

“ um . . . my whole first year of being in phoenix ?? okay maybe that’s an over-dramatization , but i don’t know if we realize just how bad that was. i had a bad quiff , i still thought “ hail ” was a cool stage name , and - don’t even get me started on the way i used to introduce myself. i was even more immature back then, and ten times worse at hiding it. i think the most embarrassing part is that when news got back to my high school that a former student was debuting in an idol group , it was this huge deal and they had me take a picture to put up in the school. so now there’s a photo - framed and all - of younger me , in the is whole hypebeast outfit, hanging up in the performing arts hallways , and haunting me for life. don’t think i can live that one down. ”

[wshaeil]

7 — if you had anything to say to your ceo, what would it be?

— if you had anything to say to your ceo , what would it be ?

“ hm . . . i have more questions than statements. like - why me ? why was there any signs from my audition that i’d make a good fit for a group , let alone the leader ? how long will we last ? are you gonna throw phoenix away when we start to lose popularity ? do you regret letting me in ? i know it all sounds depressing, but man . . . i dunno. the whole idol debut thing still seems so weird to me , and i don't understand how i got here in the first place , even after all this time. sometimes our ceo just seems like some faraway wizard who knows the answer to all my dying questions , so i guess that’s why i’d ask him so many questions. i doubt he has the answers i want , though. ”

[wshaeil]

What are your top 5 favorite artists?

“ thank god , this is my time to shine. you know, i think people misinterpret my taste, and think all i listen to is lo-fi, which is good, but not really . . . me. my top five would have to be . . . punchnello , kid milli , tyler the creator , day6 , and . . . kendrick lamar ! but if i’m being honest , i like anything that makes me really feel it, y’know ? no matter what language , genre , or lyrics those feelings are expressed in. ”