x-jonginstretto-blog

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

Gone.

Feel free to unfollow.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

Genderbender, a girl for a week. -M!A

I like my dick.

No one gave you the permission to do this.

My parents did not.

I certainly did not.

Go away.

Don't ever come back.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

Fixed it.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

Wow, guess who's turning 25-- It's been approximately 4 months since we celebrated my birthday with our legs tangled in bed and where I forced you into write me a long birthday letter which wasn't very sweet but I still treasure it with all my heart because it was the first time you expressed any sort of feelings for me, and so here I am to return it as well as to show you exactly how to write a cheese-filled letter. You already know how lousy I am with words and it's getting pretty late, so I'm actually putting 'I Wanna Be Yours' on repeat in hopes of getting anything decent out--

But before that, above is a card I drew for you with all my heart, I'm sure you can tell. I spent literally hours after afters trying to get each angle and color right. So let me just explain to you my meaningful drawing for a moment. I know my stunning artistic skills can be very overwhelming at the first glance so I'll just break it down ffor you part by part. Firstly, as you can see in the center of the picture, it's us on a lemon cake (not sure if you actually mentioned it's your favorite as a joke but oh well)! Pretty sure I don't have to mention who's who from the parts I drew so I'll just move on to say that the red filling between represents our blood merged together as a display of our unified soul and love for each other strawberry. And behind us, you can see 3 huge pink dildo-looking candles; each representing me, Jongin Jr and you, respectively. Above, you can see an arch of sorts. While most people use brass ones shaped into hearts or flowers for their wedding, I'm sure you know what fits us the most--our blood, and that's what it is. So that's about it for my art interpretation, now let's move on to a bunch of feelings for you I pulled out from my butt heart.

Alright, even though it's your birthday, don't think I'm gonna show you any form of mercy because I'd just like to say that it's already been so long but you still haven't gotten rid of that zit on your chin-- Heh, don't kill me. I'm just kidding, you know how much I love that perfect face of yours, with that perfect nose and perfect jawline. I know you're just going to deny this but everything about you is perfect--every single little imperfections of yours is what makes you so goddamn perfect to me. I just want you to know that I treasure every bit of you and I'm so happy that we've come this far. I feel like the luckiest man alive for having you, so thank you for letting me stay by your side all this time even though I've been such a brat even though you're not obliged to put up with my shit. It has been the best 4 months of my life and I wish for it to continue until we're old and divorced and distressed while fighting for our child's custody in court--

With that being said, I still want to say this even though I've mentioned this countless of times and you're probably sick of hearing it--I'll always be by your side, no matter what. Your happiness is all that matters to me and seeing you happy makes me happy. I just want to thank you for everything; you walking into my life has helped me learn and feel so many things I've never had before. Words will never express how much you mean to me and so my attempt will end here. I hope you have the best birthday ever because you deserve that and so much more. I love you, Luhan. So much. Happy birthday! ~*~♥~*~

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

trickermyun:

Pushes at your face with a scoff “Jesus just stop being obnoxiously rude when you miss people and give them a hug instead. You dumb child. I did miss you— idiot.”

[ / lets out a small huff and rubs a hand at his face mindlessly. ] Hey, it's just a unique and personal way of saying I miss them eh? [ / crinkles his nose lightly before draping his arms around your shoulders to pull you to him. ] That's good to hear then because I missed you too, idiot.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

selcouthun:

{‘a smirk tugs at the corner of his lips} Yeah, you do. Xue is a lot like me, you know. And my nickname as a child used to be huin doongie. So, not only do you and Xue make a good couple, but we would, too.

Hey, my name's just a letter difference from Kim Jongil and you don't see me bragging about being just as legendary and powerful as him. [ / reflects your smirk with a small lilt of his head. ] But then again, yeah, I suppose Xue and Kim Jongil would make a great couple as much as we would eh?

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

{`steals all your paper bags with a loud cackle`}

... Sorry sir, please stay here for a moment while I call the police and have you locked up in jail for the heinous crime of theft of paper bags.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

se-huny:

Read More

Well, let's just say that fried chicken has accompanied me through some very difficult parts of my life, shall we? [ / crinkles his nose and stumbles a little upon the bump before stabling himself again with a step back of his foot. ] My house? Sure, that'd work too. We can even have manicures with the nail polishes that my sisters left here. [ / lets out a playful snort, shaking his head. ] Aaand, overseas because I want to really want to meet Sasuke! [ / he exclaims, expression brightening up like a kid upon the mention of his favorite manga character and has to will himself to calm down with a mild purse of his lips. ] Yeah, sure. Death by cigarette isn't too bad. It's just that instead of lung cancer, I somehow prefer liver cancer--so I drink alot. [ / shrugs a shoulder. ] Just a personal preference.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

['hops around you.] j u i c e b o x.

[ / places a hand atop your head to keep you from jumping anymore. ] You're giving me headache.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

selcouthun:

You’re incorrigible. {‘frowns, crossing his arms in a petulant manner while looking away} Still, calling my dog your boyfriend is kinda weird. What if someone actually takes that seriously?

[ / mirrors your action and crosses his arms over his chest as well before staring at you in mild confusion. ] And what's wrong with that? Xue and I make a perfectly good couple, don't you think?

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

selcouthun:

How can he be yours when you don’t even own him!? No, he’s mine unless you want to start calling him your addiction now.

Like I mentioned before, what's yours is mine and what's mine is still mine so that means Xue is mine since he's yours. What-- No-- [ / frowns. ] You're my addiction, and he's my boyfriend. These are two very different things, shush.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

selcouthun replied to your post:

I'm his owner and I say no because I can. I thought we agreed on this--

NO ONE AGREED ON ANYTHING, SEHUN. LITERALLY NO ONE. He's my mine now and there's nothing you can do about it.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

#MY BOYFRIEND || No.

... Who are you to say no and stop our true, undying love for each other--

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

Sehun grins widely at the response, eyes nearly disappearing as it warps and grows into a full on smile.

'Interesting.'

"Fried chicken, huh?" He’s in minor disbelieve because this is exactly what he was looking for and he didn’t expect to get it so quickly. It’s a refreshing change from both rejection (which didn’t hurt him, only bummed him out a bit), and from acceptance that is generally so hasty, he can feel the metaphorical waves of desperation emanate from Mr.X or Ms.Y when he asks. He doesn’t like desperation, he likes easy and smooth, and this guy seems real. That’s all Sehun wants.

"You sure we have time for your life story?" He asks as his eyes rake over the handsome male before him none too subtly, making an unspoken statement that he wouldn’t mind taking his time to hear whatever he had to say. 

"One fried chicken date can’t possibly cover every detail." 

And smiles again, lifting his hand to pluck a cigarette from behind his ear and place between his lips. He immediately rummages through his, well, everything for a lighter, and when his search didn’t serve fruitful, he suddenly seemed very coy, removing it cancer stick from his lips.

"You wouldn’t happen to have a light, would you?"

Mhm, fried chicken and I'm all yours. No questions asked. [ / presses his lips together to a thin smile as he assures you. ] Well, sure one date wouldn't cover every detail. [ / he purses his lips, eyeing you for a brief moment as he shoves a hand into his pocket and lets his body stand slack. ] What do you propose then? A slumber party at your house with an endless supply of fried chicken, maybe? Or how about a sponsored trip overseas and I'm sure you'll get to know everything from how my underwear are arranged in color order to me accidentally shaving off my eyebrow when I was a kid. [ / lets out a laugh as he muses over the thought and shakes his head, waving his hand dismissively. ] Nah sorry, I have other ways of killing myself.

[x-jonginstretto-blog]

{｀...only to find that he's taken a step back and dodged the suspicious looking bag with holes; where's the hole for nose anyway } that wasn't part of the request but aight I'll take the bag, 'cept you're missing the coffee that you're (((supposed to be))) buying.

[ / clicks his tongue lightly when he misses your head and crosses his arms over his chest, eyeing you with squinted eyes. ] And why on earth would I buy you anything? [ / purses his lips and feigns a hurt expression. ] I’m just a mere barista, barely scraping by with the little money I earn from this difficult job…