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xenon-demon · 25 days

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We know Vecna can fuck around with minds, can create a kind of pseudo inner world type of thing, and that is what he does to Eddie--makes him believe he gets everything he wanted, switching him into a false world while he implants Kas into his body.

It starts off with the band making it big. Now a rockstar, Eddie leaves Hawkins with his head held high and more money than God, but soon he starts seeing Steve in the crowd.

(He’s seeing Steve because Kas is seeing Steve in reality.)

Eddie’s Steve starts off as a groupie, no an old friend, no--

It changes a lot, really.

Eddie doesn’t catch that it all changes, not at first.

(Kas does. Kas very much does, seeing a new scenario from Eddie’s curse every single time he has to face down Steve Harrington and his sweaters and his nailbat.

He shouldn’t know what a dimple is, shouldn’t know to look for a certain smile or stance, and yet he’s faltering trying to do just that.)

However Vecna’s curse decides they meet, they end hooking up and then dating and then married and then suddenly Eddie’s dream isn’t of a rockstar life, standing atop a world stage to a sold out crowd, but coming home to a man in an old yellow sweater, a man who pulls him by the waist into a hug, a man who leans in and whispers silly things in his ear…

(Kas is starting to fail.

His personality is taking Eddie’s on more. He’s pulling punches, he’s starting to do things outside of what he’s been commanded too--but only ever with Steve.

No one quite believes Steve at first, because of course he's the one to catch it. He’s spent what feels like years managing the emotions and in-fighting of a group of teenagers younger than him, often through intensely volatile situations.

The thing that’s stolen Eddie’s body is nothing compared to a Max/El/Mike spat--and the thing that has him is reacting weird to Steve.

He can exploit that.)

The curse Eddie’s under has stopped jumping around.

It’s landed him into one, singular story. One narrative, where he survived the bats, they defeated Vecna, and he and Steve are dating now.

It’s the best life Eddie’s ever lived, better than being a rockstar, more wondrous than leaving Hawkins in the dust.

He loves Steve with all his heart, and the best day in his life so far is when he tells him so--and Steve says it back.

(Kas knew Steve wasn’t being listened to by his peers and he uses that to get Steve alone.

To tell him some of Eddie’s secrets and desires--taunt him with it.

Tells him that he’s right, Eddie is still alive, and is very much trapped, and do you want to know what Vecna is showing him? What he’s using to suppress the vessel Kas is piloting?

“It’s you, Steve.”

“It’s always been you.”)

They get fake married, because Eddie can accept that Steve would one day love him but not that gay marriage would be legalized and Vecna somehow, knows that.

Robin moves out of their shared apartment, helps them move into a house (a house!) and later helps them discuss the possibility of kids, something Eddie knows Steve wants, something he’s slowly realizing he kinda wants.

Then one of Eddie’s books takes off, gets them not rich but stable, and Robin and Nancy are finding ways to help get them a kid and he’s never been happier in his life-!

(Kas can’t take it.

Steve can’t take it.

They’re breaking down together, a glorious spiral of disaster, and finally in desperation, Kas extends information he knows he shouldn’t.

Steve can enter the curse Eddie’s in--and Kas has heavily implied that he will let him.

Allow Steve to bring Eddie home, back in his own body.

“Why should I trust you?” Steve demands of Kas, in the small space they’ve mutually decided is neutral, hands clenched tightly at his sides.

“Vecna’s curse isn’t meant to last this long. Eddie and I are blending, more than ever was intended.” Kas admits, because Kas now has to deal with these kinds of thoughts--with all kinds of feelings and emotions he’s never had too, and it’s eating him alive. “And what he wants, more than anything, is you.”)

Tonight’s the night they’re meeting with the adoption agency, and Eddie’s never been excited for Steve to get off work in his life.

He practically pounces on him the minute he walks through the door, kissing him hard, hands tangled in his hair.

Steve isn’t kissing back.

Seems kinda breathless in fact, as his arms tentatively come up to hug Eddie, and when they pull apart his face is full of a stunned sort of wonder.

“Well shit he wasn’t lying.” Steve says and Eddie’s confused, because what? Who?

“I think you better sit down for this.” And Steve’s not pulling away, exactly, but driving Eddie to the couch, looking all around their house as he does so, like it's the first time he’s seeing it.

“Sunshine?” Eddie asks, concerned. “You okay?”

“Sun-?” Steve chokes, chokes on the word, and his eyes are back on Eddie’s now, like he’s seeing him for the first time too. “Where’d that nickname come from?”

“You, duh.” Eddie tells him, dropping down onto the couch, frowning when Steve does the same but sits farther apart than usual.

Eddie doesn’t like that.

Fixes it but scooting close.

Steve blushes.

Honest to God blushes, in a way Eddie’s Steve never really has before, because Eddie always saw Steve as someone who was incredibly smooth.

“You’re my sunshine.” He adds, reaching out to fix the collar on Steve’s shirt.

“I’m--” Steve pauses, emotions rioting all over his face before he sucks in a breath like a man drowning. “Okay. I have to uh, tell you something but before I do, can I…can I ask…”

He trails off and Eddie’s never seen this before, this weird sort of fragility, like Steve doesn’t understand what’s happening.

Like he doesn’t understand the two of them.

“Anything.” Eddie tells him. Makes sure the honesty comes through his voice. “You can ask me anything.”

Thinks on what could have possibly triggered this and quickly adds;

“If you decided you don’t want to adopt anymore, you know that’s fine right?”

Steve’s eyes practically boggle out of his head. The look he gives Eddie is wild, his breath catching in his chest.

“Kids? You want kids?” He asks, voice quiet. Stunned.

“Well yeah, we haven’t spent the last four months talking about puppies.” Eddie snorts, poking at him, before slowly reaching down and grabbing Steve’s hand.

“If you wanna start with the puppy first though that’s okay. It’s a big step not having the house to ourselves anymore.”

Steve’s eyes have trailed from Eddie’s to their joined hands and back, but he doesn’t let go.

“That’s not what I was going to ask but that’s--I never thought--I thought you liked being metal.” He sounds kinda wet, almost close to tears and Eddie frowns again.

“Sweetheart I am metal.” He teases gently. “But I told you before. That kind of life just didn’t compare to the one I get to have with you.”

He brings their hands up, slowly, keeping eye contact with Steve as he leans down and presses his lips to their joined hands.

“Is that what this is about? The kids?” Eddie prods gently.

Steve sucks in a breath again at the word ‘kids’ but shakes his head. “Why me?”

“What?”

“You could have anyone you wanted in here, and you picked me.” Steve gestures at the house with his free hand, as if that entire sentence somehow made sense. “We barely even know each other so--why me?”

Before Eddie can even process that, Steve quietly adds, “God there’s even the stupid gum I like on the table. How did you know about that?”

“Dustin told me you liked them at a Hellfire meeting, way back when.” Eddie answers, because that ones easy at least. “And you--you know this, Stevie. I’ve always liked you.”

He grins, leaning into Steve’s face in a way that has him blushing again. “Might have acted like an ass back in the day, because well, the town gay crushing on the local golden boy is just sooo cliche,” He rolls his eyes playfully, elongating his o’s and enjoys the tiny smile he gets for it.

“but the more time I spent with you during that whole Vecna thing, the more time I kept thinking to myself that Nancy Wheeler was a moron. And that if I ever got to move out of Hawkins and actually date, then I wanted to be in a relationship with someone like you.”

Steve does the weirdest thing then.

Pulls their hands back to himself and bows his head over it, pressing their joined fingers to his forehead.

“God Munson, you know how to seduce a guy.” He says after a second, refusing to move, to look Eddie in the face.

“Only guy I’m hoping to seduce is you~!” Eddie sing-songs, before giving in to his own desire and giving Steve a kiss on the top of his perfect hair.

“Yeah, well, you succeeded, I think.” Steve tells him with a laugh, and it still sounds wet, like he’s seconds from bursting into tears, but there’s something else wound up in there too.

Eddie thinks it might be wonder, but isn’t sure--which is odd, because when it comes to Steve he’s always been sure.

Steve’s like a fairy tale prince to him. An open book that's easy to read.

To not know what he wants, what he needs, is--weird.

“I was going to ease into this, but I’m not sure you’re gonna be happy with anything else I have to say now, so.” Steve finally sits back up, and fuck, he does have tears in his eyes. “Just--let me talk, okay?”

Eddie reaches out, wiping at the one that escapes and tracks down Steve’s cheeks.

“I don’t have to always be happy with you to hear you out.” Eddie tells him sweetly. “I will always hear you out.”

Steve shakes his head, like he can’t believe anything that’s happened in the last ten minutes, and moans what Eddie is pretty sure is a quiet “Oh my God.” but bravely plunges ahead.

At which point Eddie promptly decides Steve was absolutely right on the money about the not-liking thing, because he’s informed that:

He’s under Vecna’s curse.

He and Steve are not fake-married.

They’re not even dating or involved with each other and that--surprise!-- ten years have not actually gone by. It’s actually only been about three weeks total.

They also all thought he died, but Vecna somehow kept him alive, by getting some kind of Upside Down thing to galivant about in his body.

“Kas helped me come here and I didn’t get it at first, why he would, but I get it now.” Steve tells him, refusing to let go of Eddie’s hand even when he kept trying to jerk it away.

“No way.” Eddie shakes his head, as he had been shaking his head, because he was deep in denial. “No fucking way, man. This cannot be fake, I lived this, Steve!”

“Look,” His partner (not his partner? Fuck!) sooths, once again pulling Eddie back down to the couch when he tries to spring to his feet, “I can’t, like, promise it’ll work out just like this did. I didn’t--fuck, I hadn’t actually really thought about dating men before about five minutes ago, but-,”

Steve bites one of his lips before seeming to make a decision, firmly saying;

“We can try for this, if you come back.”

“How do I even go back, Steven!?” Eddie snips in return, this close to using Steve’s full government name and--wait, fuck, what is Steve’s full government name? He had it a minute ago, he had…he had…

“Kas said I had to get you to accept that this wasn’t real, and then you have to walk through the door with me. Not sure he meant the physical door but,” Steve shrugs, “It’s a start.”

“If you and I never--if we didn’t,” Eddie is stumbling, grasping for memories that are suddenly leaving him, crumbling like sandcastles kicked over. “Why would you even want me, man?”

Why would the Steve of old, the one who hadn’t had that critical moment (what moment? Eddie had it a second ago and now it was lost too--) who hadn’t gone out on those dates (why couldn’t he recall the dates now? The--there was a stuffed bear, wasn’t there? Or was it a tiger? A llama? No…) want to be with Eddie?

Steve’s on his feet, and tugging at Eddie to follow.

“Look at what you built, for me. For us.” He says. “I know I’m stupid Eddie, but I’m not this stupid. This is--” He pauses.

Casts his eyes around before letting them find Eddie once again. “This is amazing.”

“You’re not stupid.” Eddie protests, free hand tugging at his hair because Steve is still refusing to let go of his other one. “You know I hate it when you call yourself that.”

“You do?”

“Yes!” Eddie’s not breaking down, he’s not!--Except he sort of is and oh God, this is fake, isn’t it?

Even the house is starting to look a little dreamy, too perfect, too plastic…

“No one’s ever hated that for me. They just agreed. Even--” Steve pauses, before plowing ahead, “even Robin, sometimes, does it and she’s like, my best friend, Eds.”

“So!?”

“So maybe my sexuality wasn’t as firm as I thought it was five minutes ago. Maybe I’m just a slut for people putting in effort. Either way,” He’s tugging at Eddie again, trying to get him to walk through the front door. “What I really need is for you to come back.”

“Fine, fine, but if this is true Steve and you decide otherwise I don’t want to fucking hear a word about this, okay? I don’t need to hear how stupid I was for--for playing house!”

“I want to play house Eddie. I apparently want to play it with you. Now,” They’re almost there, Steve’s hand on the knob, twisting the door open, “Come on. Come back with me.”

“Okay.” Eddie says, six million emotions flowing through him and yet he’s unable to name a single one he’s so strung out. “Okay.”

Together they step through.

(“You have to promise me, Steve, that no matter what you see, you’ll take care of him.”

“That’s a damn weird thing to hear from the parasite that's taken over his body, Kas.”

“Promise me anyway, you stupid fucking human. Eddie is--he’s…I can’t let him come back to you if you’re going to throw him away.”

“I,” And Steve is standing tall, a snarl on his face and voice sharp, “would never throw him away.”

“Even if he wants you? Even if he thinks he has you?”

“Eddie does have me, dipshit. Now let me in so I can get him back.”)

“Eddie?” Someone asks distantly.

Eddie thinks it's Steve, but he can’t tell because he’s face down in what feels like dirt, and also his entire body hurts.

“Yeah?” He answers with a groan, cautiously rolling over onto his back.

God why does it feel like he went ten rounds in a mosh pit?

A shadow falls over him and he blinks, looking up dumbly to see Steve’s face.

Squeezes his eyes back shut, moaning as the light tries to immediately give him a headache.

“Are you back?”

“From what?” He says, as his brain tries to catch up with his body.

“With me? Kas isn’t uh--there? Anymore?”

“Who the fuck is Kas?” Eddie asks, before everything fucking hits him at once.

His eyes shoot back open and he sits up with a horrified gasp.

Nearly smacks Steve in the head as he does it, hands scrabbling at the dirt, then at his chest.

Steve, and kids and puppies and fake, fake, it was all fake--

“Who's Luke’s father in the Star War?”

“Star Wars, Steve, there’s an S.” Eddie snaps, the question something to focus on amidst all his panic. “ And Darth Vader is.”

Steve’s kneeling in the dirt, one hand in his hair and the other outstretched, like he’d tried to touch Eddie and stopped himself.

“Good. That’s--that’s good.” He says cautiously.

The look on his face is…

Distantly, Eddie realizes he’s about to puke.

He sucks down a breath, suppresses it.

“Was I actually trapped?” Eddie starts after a long, painful moment. “In Vecna’s curse?”

Steve nods so fast he might as well have been a bobblehead.

“Yeah man, you were.”

“Okay.” Eddie feels the panic start to gnaw at him again, but keeps it at bay because maybe, just maybe, Steve experienced something different. Didn’t say things about playing house and get kissed and all that embarrassing shit. “You--came and got me, right?”

Steve’s nodding again.

“What did you see?” Eddie’s voice is rising impossibly high, and he can feel how red his face is getting, and the stupid shirt he’s wearing feels like it hasn’t been washed in a decade and it’s low-key driving him crazy with how stiff it is, and--

“Steve, get away from him!” Someone shrieks.

“It’s Eddie!” Steve calls back, throwing a hand up like he’s a wizard trying to cast a spell. “It’s not Kas, Robs, it’s Eddie!”

There’s a loud noise, the cocking of a weapon that makes Eddie flinch.

Nancy Wheeler has a shotgun pointed right at him, Robin hovering next to her.

“Prove it.” she says coldly.

“I can.” Steve calls back, before turning his attention back to Eddie, still crouched in the dirt because Eddie’s still sprawled out.

If Nancy wants to shoot him, she has him dead to rights.

“Come on, Eds.” Steve says, and his voice is gentling, echoing a tone Eddie has heard a thousand times in his memories. “I wasn’t kidding about giving it a shot and I really liked that nickname you gave me.”

“Sunshine?” Eddie blurts out, because his mouth and his brain have never, ever synced up right, and decides to just trot out that he knows exactly what Steve is referencing. No playing coy, no pretending he has no idea and forcing Steve to pick something that doesn’t out him to the world.

A smile breaks across Steve’s face. “Yeah. Sunshine. Come here, I didn’t get to kiss you back the first time.”

It’s fucking emberassing how fast Eddie is scrambling to his knees, how he doesn’t care that Nancy is lowering the gun with a raise of her eyebrows, or how Robin’s saying something, he doesn’t know what, because he needs this right now, when things are still blurred together.

He needs Steve.

Flings himself at him, and finds himself caught as Steve hauls him close.

Kisses him and of all the things Steve had said, this was all the proof Eddie needed that the world he’d lived in was fake.

This kiss was far superior to all of the rest.

(“I’m really happy for you guys, but can you like, stop making out in front of us!?” Robin yells sometime later.

Steve flips her off.)

#stranger things fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #kas!eddie #this is INCREDIBLE #I loved it SO MUCH

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