xeppelinsfw - Tumblr blog

[xeppelinsfw]

Yayo jaja: American Man, widely credited as the first man to "ever jerk off his own asshole instead of dick" was killed today and went straight to heaven/hell. he was 272,625 years old and will be missed by a handful of employees at Bradford Hotmills LLC and jesusgod

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balls and pusy on the SAME mound

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fucking cool 👍

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Excuseme i have a doctors note here uh huh. yup. it say's here i have brainfog an account from beating off into shoes . or whatever. Hey wait a second,m your the guy from fucking RollerGames. Yeah the guy with the bald ponytail. Did anyone tell you you seound EXACTLY like kim mitchell. Guy had a set of pipes that's for sure. *snapping to get your attention* Here. Here. Here. Here. Here. Here.

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stick that pussy up my ass

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OOGA CHAKA OOGA OOGA OOGA CHAKA OOGA OOGA I CAN'T SUCK THIS PENIS

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injecting sand into my urethra from the top of the shaft and pissblasting, turning my entire dick into a portable waterjet OR a dangerous weapon. so bascially if you need some FR-4 in the most fucked up shapes imaginable weeell catch me on a good day and i'll fix something up for you but i can't promise its shape or dimensions will like, be within any acceptable tolerance. are U listening to me

[xeppelinsfw]

one time my dick got stuck in the conditioner bottle

and then you could not get it off and you were too embarrassed to go to doctor/hospital so eventually your poenis grew to fit the shape of the bottle and 20 years later when they Dremel it off you have what is essentially a club shaped penis that you can drive nails in with and shit so you get hired at a construction cumpany and everyone thinks you are a novelty and put these ideas in your head about being a youube sensation and so you tell your story to millions online and then you have a catchophrase and a media empire and do reaction video and relate your every thought, as you pause the videom, to your club penis

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balls explode out of sack when fart hard

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Suck my awesome cock and lick my superb balls

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How bout you casually explain my nuts and ass sucka

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I'm basically the shaun king of no hands cum

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gotta take this stupid ass piss before going to bed

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Shitting with PENIS

I don’t know why but while shitting lately, PENIS has become furiously arroused. Maybe it’s the stench of my manshit or the rubbing of my prostate as a turd escapes my hairy hole…whatever it is, penis stands up looking at me, beckoning me to bate him to slobber, to cockgaze at him, to become entranced. So primal… The feeling of cock being fucked while my manhole natural agapes, exposing my filth….together PENIS and I are filth….porn filth

[xeppelinsfw]

tickle your sperm cannon maybe

[xeppelinsfw]

she sat on me too hard and severed my Vast Deferens