xtremesam-blog

[xtremesam-blog]

Ignite me

Love, the strongest energy on earth yet is never simple as expected. They were together but nvr forever. He wanted her more than anything and she had opened her heart to him. It was clear they loved each other but love is compliacated, right? Fate had different things planned out for them. They seperated cuz they knew if it continued what they had it would only bring downfall. Still N All the wound had not healed. Years after they said goodbyes, they met again. N he couldn’t resist because what he felt couldn’t be neglected so easily.

POV

I don’t know why but it feels like somethings gonna happen today. I guess I will know it soon. She should be there too but I am not sure if she will come. I can’t believe I am still thinking abt her. I should have forgetten her already. I step out if mu house and the night is beautiful with a cool breeze. A re-union with school friends is jst what you need to warm up. I have to say they have really made this party amazingly great. I don't know why my heart feels somewhat empty. I mix up with the demons like friends with whom I have worst as well as funny memories. The music is slow and pleasing. I pick up a glass of whiskey and start grooving like old days. Our signature step was the best one in the whole school. From the corner of my eye, I could see a hint of black. Then I see it. I see her. She is in a black attire cuz that's her favourite color. Her hair with that ash blue lining reminds me of her hair flips that she used to do to annoy me. Her imperfections shown flawlessly in that body con dress made me shiver. The tattoo on her neck, the sensitive point, where kiss always worked to turn her on. Those black pumps which could be found recklessly lying the day after we made out. Her eyes still felt so deep that I could swim forever. The same confidence, same glow and the same power to attract. But it's more than that. More than just bodies, it's the soul. Then I realized the emptiness flew away and warmth is all I feel. Those days of togetherness, fightings and cuddles. I miss it. I miss her. Maybe I should not have let her go. Our eyes met and she smiled like everything is the same. The way she took the glass of whiskey and the way she finished it up in a single shot; man, that can appeal anyone. It seems fate is wanting us back cuz the DJ just played the song I wrote for her. I put down my glass. I cannot come so near her and again let her go away. Let her choose someone else over me. I walk towards her. She seems confused like she doesn't want me. I hesitate. Then she walks slowly to me. I smile and walk up to her. I grab her hand. She doesn't let go. Her hands fit perfectly in mine. We danced like we did always. N it felt right. Like nothing ever happened to us. Words are not needed to feel what is going on. Her body on mine feels heavenly and the whiskey didn't end up alone to be responsible for me to be drunk. Yes, I am drunk. Drunk in her love perhaps......

(End of POV)

They knew that it was just a single night for them. They knew they had to go their own ways the following day. Still not caring this they followed their heart. They had a beautiful night with unlimited and undoubting love. They ignited the hidden fire of love in each other's heart. They fixed what was left out. It never mattered what life brought next for them cuz that moment will never prove to be regretful.

🖤

[xtremesam-blog]

When you know it's over......

It's a human nature to stay together, to share thoughts and feelings. We do not prefer isolation. But there are times when you want to be all alone, no one there to judge you or ask you for explanations. When you are all fine from outside but bleeding inside. U know, I couldn't have good friends in my life for long. I didn't prefer girls not cuz I don't like em. Cuz I am a kind of girl who wants to be in a boy gang. Doesn't mean I never had girl friends. I did. When the last year came, it came along with bunch of surprises. The unexpected twist and turns. Jst 45 days for all this to be over but I feel like leaving tomorrow. Why? Because the people you trusted to be there for u, turned out to be the same egoistic assholes. Sometimes you hurt someone without any fault. When that person shows gradual change in attitude towards you, a worm called guilt always eats you from inside. U cannot cry cuz u know, u are not wrong and won't wanna be weak. U want to confront but things will only get worse. N u feel it the very minute seconds that the connection is fading and no one gives a shit abt you. That time u want to be alone. All alone. Where you get time to process everything. To understand that it's all over and shouldn't even affect. The alone time or your space is needed so that you can get back all the strength to fight it through. Through that hell of 45 days and after that it's nth but a bad past.

🖤

[xtremesam-blog]

Friendship Vs Relationship

Friends. Will be there for you no matter what. Partner in crime and punishment. Friendship. Built cause you needed someone. Someone who is the only person that can make you laugh and cry for no reason. Love. Most beautiful thing in life I guess. However, not always the sweet cherry for everyone. Lover. Will want you no matter what. Shows you things you love to explore. Relationship. Built in nothing but trust. Something that brings betrayal and redemption at its end. The thing that makes me hate a friend is when s/he chooses relationship over friendship. Happened to me. Yes. Didn't say anything to him cuz I knew we would eventually fade away. Those all years of laughter and nonsense was thrown away to be locked down. There are times when a begining of a relationship means end to a friendship whether it is dating your Besty's Ex or choosing him/her over the special one. Yeah it is difficult to balance frienships and relationships but should be done. The person you think you love and that person loves you back will never hate your friends if they are okay. It's the human nature to feel jealous or protective or insecure but trust is wat it matters. Without it the world is worthless. You might think why I support friendship? In a relationship, if u cheat and get caught all you get is your heart broken from everyone and a huge guilt. When u are depressed it's your friend that says, "Legendary man. How were you handling those two? You got skills mate. Real skills." Offers you a beer and makes you laugh in the most regretful situations of life. Never ever leave that friend. You will know the importance of friends when you have none. That point of life will make you realize romance may be short lived but buddies are for a lifetime.

🖤

[xtremesam-blog]

Guilt

Life is crazy. I mean I have board exams tomorrow and I can't concentrate on anything. One moment is enough to tear you. Sometimes things are said wrong and maybe understood wrong and time is exactly not the right one to pour it all out. Nothing has really happened perfectly in my life. Even if I had moments that brought smile to my face, it never lasted long, never was long enough and the wound it gave can never be healed. My relation with my parents could never be right. Everything was great but just small arguments and things one utters out make you realize that world is selfish and you are a part of it too. U know sometimes your one statement can create huge issues. Issues that are not easy to solve. That breaks friendship in no matter of time. That guilt is the worst feeling to ever have. It makes you feel really bad like you are a horrible person. Others cry because of you and you can do nothing as you still have anger for them. You cannot sort things out and it kills you but still you wouldn't face it cuz you can't and you won't. It will be odd to face them tomorrow because you know it's your fault, you can't make things the way it was and can't even talk about it. Things will never be right. Although I am gonna sort it out and make things right, our friendship will not be okay. There will always be the wound of that moment and I know pretty well it won't heal up. I don't know what tomorrow has for us but all I can pray is that nobody remembers what happened and life goes on just the way it was supposed to be.

🖤

[xtremesam-blog]

The Last Year

The last year has been a changing factor for everyone. It's the last year of school! It's like a adventure where you expect to get the unexpected. I don't know why but like as our seniors enjoyed their last year with links ups N tears, I also hoped that our last year would be unforgettable. We have only 3 months left and with everyday passing, I wonder how am I gonna fit in the new world with new faces and no laughter in nonsense things and breaking the rules we promised everyday to carry out. Yeah, for some it was the same old routine and everyday torture. However, not for all of us. One thing I have found out this year is how actually a person is from inside. Most people do not show who they are. Even I don't. I find myself puzzled to find out what really am I like. Likewise, when the person you are fond of so much hurts you, you kinda break. I know that moment N feeling. Deep down you feel that cold. You may think what can a bunch of 22 kids do? Trust me you can never imagine. You just can't. Well telling this story from beginning takes a long time. Maybe I will write abt that too somebody. But now it's the things that made us realize who we really are. N it was not taking sides or debating. It was when you stayed together 24 hours only to feel it was 48 hours. It was when you see others study for themselves N you understand tgat but still have a fear of losing. When somebody you hated so much proves to be a dear one. This year was not easy. We had to make choices. Some came right from the heart and some jumped off from brain. The heart one's I still regret N the brain one's, it was never a part of me. However, some decisions were taken because you get only a single life and your life sucks as your freedom has a boredom in it. It doesn't end here and the story has yet not begun. Wait until you get all the secrets we have. The eye contacts only two person understand. The story that made us, tore us and fixed us........

🖤