xxrozepetalxx

[xxrozepetalxx]

I still think the most devastating enshittification I've ever seen has been picrew. One of the few dress-up game websites left that's not flash-based and it's become DRENCHED in ads. You can't open the home screen without being blasted by at least three or four ads. You can't open two picrews in a row without watching a video ad first. When you have a picrew open the ads cover up the different options and sometimes even stack on each other so you have to hit like 2 or 3 different x buttons to get it to go away, only for more to appear seconds later. Evil world

[xxrozepetalxx]

alright so I'm flimsily constructing a novel around the premise of dating a spider man. not the Marvel kind, but a man who is literally half spider.

so we start off, and it's invasion of the bodysnatchers. a race of aliens that are definitely not yeerks are taking over the Canadian parliament. then, what's this? truck-kun?

the alien wakes up. it's been isekaiid into a fantasy world, and is now in the body of a frail albino prince. and it's up to him (and a troop of plucky heros) to defeat the demon lord!

but along the way, after slaughtering a mass of the demon lord's forces, they take a spider man captive, forcing him to serve as their guide. sparks fly. roses blossom. some weird gay alien/ spider man action commences.

I don't know what happens after that, maybe just 200 pages of biologically accurate spider sex.

[xxrozepetalxx]

Did anyone ever like attempt to document and compile the variations of Barney the dinosaur murder ballads across the elementary school system in the early 2000s. Like legit it has always fascinated me as a phenomena and I would love to know if there were like traceable regional variations or what.

[xxrozepetalxx]

Thinking about when I worked at a shitty restaurant + one night it was just me + 3 other women on closing shift, so some guy came in the back and waved a knife around, presumably for money but I’m not actually certain, bc he was met with the bartender holding a much bigger knife, a tiny teenager wielding a cast iron pan, an elderly woman holding up a crockpot of clearly boiling water, and me, turning on the meat slicer with eye contact for maximum effect. He left, but the moral of the story is not girl power or whatever, it’s just. Why the fuck would you threaten a room full of underpaid and sleep-deprived blue-collar workers surrounded by lethal weapons.

[xxrozepetalxx]

inspired by the scariest words my dm has ever said to me and the subsequent coolest (AND SCARIEST) scene of my life

[xxrozepetalxx]

widehead

[xxrozepetalxx]

There’s one guy in Columbus Ohio that has a completely unique strain of Covid that we only know about because of how much he is shitting and it is baffling researchers.

His identity is a mystery but they know where commutes to because his shits turn up there too.

[xxrozepetalxx]

socal Media app perfec t size for put personal ID in to age veryify! inside very Safe and Web Security info kept safely put ID in Social Media Website. Put ID In Social Media Website. no problems ever in soccial media website because good third party App and Privacy for personal information sensitive of private state issued ID. Asocialmedia Website yes a place for a legal ID put ID in social media website can trust social media website for keepeing good secret of identity. friend social media

[xxrozepetalxx]

The thing is, even if you were lucky and your parents taught you how to clean, they probably didn't teach you how to clean the stuff you clean stuff with, like brushes, mops, sponges, rags, and so on. Or how to clean your cleaning appliances, like a dish washer, clothes washing machine, and clothes dryer and its ducts (if you have a ducted dryer), or a carpet cleaner, vacuum, Or how to clean up clean messes, like spilled bleach or detergent.

My parents threw away all of these things (even the vacuum cleaners and the dryer) when they got too dirty to function, because no one even told them THAT they could be cleaned. Cost them thousands of dollars over the years.

All I'm saying is that cleaning is not intuitive, and not knowing how to clean is not a moral failing, but it is something you can learn.

I'm going to reblog this post with resources for learning how to clean things and how to clean cleaning things (I'm not at my desk at the moment). If you have any favorites, please feel free to add them in too!

[xxrozepetalxx]

What are some chronic illnesses that can only occur in a fantasy setting?

[xxrozepetalxx]

Jinshi: “she is immune to my flirting and good looks.” 😔☹️

Maomao every 10 min in her head: “he’s so gorgeous he could topple nations. He’s so pretty he could make the most straight men gay. He’s so charming he could waltz into any room and get whatever he wants. He’s so heckin’ beautiful he is like a rare flower people would destroy kingdoms to find.”

And then she makes that face.

[xxrozepetalxx]

There is a species of butterfly that lives in the mountains.

When it hatches as a caterpillar, it lowers itself to the ground on a strand of silk, and then produces a chemical that smells like the larvae of ants. An ant eventually discovers it, lured by the scent, and brings it back to the anthill, where it is cared for by the colony until it pupates. After a few weeks, the adult butterfly crawls back up through the anthill, through the dirt and the winding tunnels, and out into the sunlight before it can finally open its wings.

Some say that the caterpillar “tricks” the ants into doing this. I don’t know if I agree – I think it’s too small a thing to accuse of guile, don’t you?

With this in mind: Once upon a time, there were seven dwarves.

They lived and worked in the mountains, mining for gold and jewels and precious things. And one night, after a long day’s labour, they heard a knocking at the great stone doors of their mountain.

Outside, shivering and small, they found a human child.

I’m sure you can guess most of what she told them. Stepmothers were involved – it’s not important. What’s important was that each of the dwarves felt a dire and pressing need to care for the child, and they took her into their home, fed her, clothed her, and gave her a warm bed to sleep in. And many seasons passed around that mountain, with the dwarves raising the child as one of their own, until one autumn’s day.

The girl laid, slender and still, in a coffin of spun glass. And some weeks later, one of the dwarves had the idea to call for a prince. This was of course the sensible thing to do, and the prince of a nearby kingdom who listened to the story thought an ensorcelled girl would be a grand thing to rescue.

Poor devils. It feels cruel to judge them. But there were so many questions they could’ve asked – what was this stepmother’s name? Was she real? Did she exist? Who had made the glass coffin? Surely one of them must’ve thought of the question. And why did it grow more opaque with every passing day?

Were they wrong to trust?

I guess it doesn’t matter now.

The moment the prince stepped into the subterranean chamber with the glass coffin, it shivered with a twinkling, plinking noise. Threads of glass exploded into glittering, razor-edged confetti.

A claw split the great glass cocoon.

The thing that spilled out of it, hulking and huge, knew in the fog of its mind, in a base animal sense that screamed, that it was in a room too small for it to fit. It wanted up. It wanted out.

In front of it was some twiggy little thing holding a sword.

It took its first breath.

The flames were the colour of cornflowers.

The dwarves fled. The thing followed close behind, up, up, up through the stone and the winding tunnels, not to chase, not to hunt, but to get up, to get out, out, out–

It struck the great stone doors at a run. They crumbled like gingerbread. And then there was sunlight, and the open sky…

And it could finally open its wings.

Convergent evolution is a hell of a thing.

The dragon, of course, lived happily ever after with its loot of gold and jewels from a hastily abandoned dwarf mine. Being much bigger than a caterpillar, we could accuse it of tricking the dwarves who were kind to it, had taken it in, had fed and clothed and warmed it.

It probably wouldn't mind.

[xxrozepetalxx]

This sucks so bad, I need to [remembers suicide jokes only worsen my mental health] slay the Princess. If I don’t, it will be the end of the world.

[xxrozepetalxx]

Smitten and Hero are my favorite voices. (⁠◔⁠‿⁠◔⁠)

The voices just look exactly the same, they just wear different hats. Lmao (Totally not because I don't want to come up with designs.)

[xxrozepetalxx]

i’m a weird little guy married to a very normal guy. so sometimes when i partake in weird little guy behavior and mr. normal guy doesn’t say anything i’ll turn to him and say, “are you not endeared by me?” and every single time without fail he responds, “i’m very endeared by you, sweetheart.”

until today.

i was in the kitchen with the lights off frog-squatted in front of the open fridge door eating a cold rotisserie chicken straight from the bag with my bare hands. you know. like god intended.

so when he walks into the kitchen and spots me his step falters. and i look up at him grinning with rotisserie chicken particles on my face and say, “what? are you not endeared by me?”

he looks at me for a moment longer before saying, “no.” and walking out, forgetting about whatever it was he came in there for.

[xxrozepetalxx]

ERM THIS TOOK A BIT TOO LONG

[xxrozepetalxx]

Idk how to do animatics

This guys are so shape I luv drawing them sm!!