xxxjahseh - Tumblr blog

[xxxjahseh]

for the first time ever, his face freezed into a mask that resembled his father's face, rough and deliciously chilling, the softness on his face was gone, his body was carelessly, arrogantly at ease. who, by divine night, held the death and life of people around him. his soul died in the process of getting revenge, only his physical body remains.

[xxxjahseh]

abuser.

you left me to rot in that abandoned piece of shit of a house for over a year, with him. he would routinely come down at night to torture me. he would record and even sent you footage of me being tortured, i didn't care about the torture; i was used to it. i expected you to come and get me out of that shithole. but, you know what you did? you replaced me with someone new. not even giving a fuck about where i was and how i am. he would beat me everyday with a crowbar while i was stuck to that old wheelchair, i would beg him to just kill me, but, he didn't. he enjoyed it. you did this to me, i'll always hate you for that. you had the choice and you threw it all away, he took me away from you.

[xxxjahseh]

trauma.

you know what i thought? I thought i would be the last person you would ever hurt. if someone treated you the way you treated me, i would've done nothing but searched the whole planet for that pathetic pile of evil death worshipping garbage and sent him off to hell.

[xxxjahseh]

bound together.

the fascinating conflict between them, they are simultaneously opposite and equal, like two sides of the same coin. he's colorful and loud, she's dark and silent. he's chaos, she's order. they know each other better than anyone and yet they don't know a thing about each other. one cannot exist without the other, they give each other purpose. both are destined to be with each other forever.

[xxxjahseh]

was it so easy for you to move on? All our random talks, all those hilarious moments we had.

how do people move on so easily if they claim to love you? what is this love.

staying up till night to just text and call you, to be comforted by you was beautiful. dreaming about you, thinking about you all day smiling like a child.

what went wrong? was my love not good enough? did I made you mad? what was it? the times we shared, our laughter, our tears. did they not matter to you?

you forgot me so easily like I'm dead to you. i, now look up to stars and think to myself "will you ever come back?"

[xxxjahseh]

when you're losing the will to talk and feelings for them <<<<

[xxxjahseh]

got so many girls that love me, but the one I love is fucking with someone else.

[xxxjahseh]

PAY ATTENTION

It saddens me so much that people literally literally ask for help to at least cure there depression, they’ll beg you for help and even drop hints of it. But, none of you fuckers help, you let them drown in this depression and once they suicide, what do you all say? “So sad that he/she died they were so young rip“ what the fuck? Is this the world we live in? Instead of helping people, we let them die? How are you all so blind? If your friend or someone is depressed, help them, the fuck are you doing? You’re watching them die? 1000+ people die because they don’t have anyone to comfort them and they will say it on there stories, comments and bio etc and NO ONE fucking helps. You all just watch. Extremely sad.

[xxxjahseh]

I still don’t get it, how the fuck do you fake fucks have the time to pretend that you care & love someone? Piece of shits.

[xxxjahseh]

there comes a point when it’s fuck being nice & humble, be the evil you. let the anger and darkness consume you.

[xxxjahseh]

I remember I walked away from home that day.

Feeling miserable and digusted by everything.

Didn’t know what awaited me.

People were walkin’, talkin’ in the distance.

I was lost in my head.

So I turned around and saw ”her”

She laughed at the sight of me, had no weapons, I guess her hands were enough for me.

She approached me and said ”Baby, you shouldn’t be walkin’ on your own”

She smiled and laughed like a “witch” and said “How far are you from home?”

I said maybe “60 minutes”

She dissapeared from my vision, I should’ve run right fucking there.

I tried running, but fuck she caught up to me.

Tears falling harder and harder, minutes were getting harder.

I could’ve had a son or daughter, what am I gonna do?

She said “Now your time finally up, are you going to heaven or hell?”

My whole life flashed infront of me.

Now it’s here, death had arrived, my time’s finally up.

[xxxjahseh]

I’m in pain, wanna put ten shots in my brain.

I been fucked up over things I can’t change.

I’m always suicidal same time as I’m tame.

Imagine this in a bed.

Get a message “the girl that you fucked with killed herself”

That was this previous month and nobody fucking helped.

Ever since then, I hate myself, wanna fucking end my life.

Motherfuckers are exicited about my death.

Post traumatic stress got me fucked up.

Been fucked up since my friend died.

FUCKING SICKENING!

[xxxjahseh]

warning to everyone, im only only gonna experince true love, acceptance, loyalty, victory and success this year and till I die! i’m proud of myself and none of y’all negative opinions/energy affect me anymore.

[xxxjahseh]

warning to y’all, im gonna ascend into a different person and I will only only experience true love, victor, success and loyalty this year and throughout my life! so to anyone that hates me or is just very negative about me, keep doing that, it gives me energy.

[xxxjahseh]

understand this, I’ll continue to evolve and I’m ONLY ONLY gonna experince success and victory this year and throughout my life too! warning you’re gonna see a very intelligent man from onwards.

[xxxjahseh]

I’m going to focus on bettering the world instead of paying attention to any type of negative energy/person, watch and see how I ascend into a young dumb kid to a self loving genius men.

[xxxjahseh]

see how I change from a young idiot kid to a completely self loving genius man.