ycllwblck-blog

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※ STARKID’S THE GUY WHO DIDN’T LIKE MUSICALS  ※

starters from starkid’s new musical the guy who didn’t like musicals ! feel free to change names/pronouns/places/etc !

“I mean, what the fuck?”

“Should we kill him?”

“What an ass. What a bitch. What a cuck!”

“It’s the end of the world, Paul.”

“We swear we will teach you.”

“The apotheosis is upon us.”

“Did you hear the word?”

“He’s destined to go viral.”

“Where the fuck is he?”

“He definitely won’t like this.”

“You’ve gotta believe in something, Paul.”

“You piece of shit.”

“Were you gonna sign up for the company softball league.”

“I don’t want to, though.”

“Sweetheart, it’s… cuddle night.”

“What do you mean ‘so what’, the counselor says we should do it at least once a month!”

“We skipped last month…”

“Don’t you think I’m tired, too?”

“Maybe tomorrow night then, huh?”

“That was Sam. He’s doing just fine…”

“I’m sorry, you can’t smoke in here.”

“Her mother, just to make me look small, took her all the way to New York to see Hamilton.”

“Wow. She’ll like that just as much as Hamilton.”

“She thinks you’re cool. Maybe you could talk me up a bit.”

“Bill… no. Sorry.”

“You’d rather do nothing than come with us to see Mamma Mia.”

“I’d rather do anything than go see Mamma Mia.”

“The idea of sitting there, trapped, in a musical, that is my own personal hell.”

“I’m trying to reconnect with my teenage kid and you’re just gonna leave me hanging?”

“I just want my daughter back…”

“You didn’t invite me.”

“I don’t wanna show you up.”

“I don’t wanna give my money to some corporate chain.”

“I don’t wanna disturb anyone.”

“Did you do that to be nice or did you do it to be an asshole?”

“Oh, no, what am I gonna do without that dollar that I have to split with five other people?”

“That sign’s bullshit!”

“I still haven’t gotten my hot chocolate.”

“I have very low blood sugar.”

“I just tipped because, you know… people should tip.”

“Not that you’re an asshole. Well, maybe you are.”

“Oh, no, that’s for you. I don’t give a shit about them.”

“I think I had to see that. I did not like it.”

“I don’t like musicals. Watching people sing and dance makes me very uncomfortable.”

“Some things are worth it.”

“I see you in here all the time, don’t I?”

“Oh, shoot, I forgot Bill’s caramel frap… eh, fuck Bill.”

“You don’t give to Greenpeace, do you?”

“This has to be the last time.”

“You’re such an asshole, but that uniform is so fucking sexy.”

“If anyone thinks that makes me less of a man, they can talk to my fucking gun!”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to pick you up?”

“Come on, you bastard! You don’t think I’m ready for you?”

“What the fuck was that?”

“What’s happening? I’m very confused and concerned by all of this.”

“Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.”

“We get there, and the whole theatre was exploded by a god dang meteor!”

“You got enough coffee in the sugar?”

“Is today some kind of, I don’t know, Canadian holiday or something?”

“You’re fucking useless, Paul.”

“I just have a bad feeling about all of this.”

“I don’t know why, but it frightened me.”

“What do you want, Paul?”

“What’s that one concrete goal that motivates all your actions?”

“I don’t know, I want money-?”

“A man so vague just can’t be trusted.”

“Do you know what I want for myself?”

“I want you to choke me out at night.”

“This seems like a private moment. Like, who is this for?”

“I want you to choke me while I jerk off.”

“No, Paul, I want you to hear this, if you leave, you’re fired.”

“I forgot what I wanted to say.”

“I wanna go home!”

“Please, God, I just want a black coffee!”

“You’re talking to me, like a normal person.”

“I think there’s something terribly wrong with the world today.”

“It is scary, if you think about the implications. Promise me you’ll think about the implications.”

“Are you frightened?”

“When I got this job, I signed up to serve coffee and cold, shitty pastries.”

“Whose decision was it to line an alleyway with tons of shrubs?”

“There’s a dead end here, so… just go the other way again.”

“I know this is probably a bad time, but, uh, do you like film?”

“You were right. I didn’t think about the implications.”

“If you want to stay in our hiding spot, you’ve gotta stay quiet.”

“Uh… fuck you…?”

“You grabbed the wrong one, you noodle!”

“We’re cops. And we make sense.”

“We’re up in your shit.”

“Do the things I say, I’m a cop!”

“We have to get out of downtown, okay? Downtown is fucked.”

“I’m his favorite student ‘cause I bought him groceries once.”

“What do you call a guy that lives in a fortress?”

“He thinks the world is ending, he’s been preparing for the last 20 years for the apocalypse.”

“I am a presbyterian. I am not gonna die in your dirty-ass methodist church.”

“I don’t need to see it, thank you.”

“These are my friends. This is Paul, and… them.”

“I theorized this exact scenario thirty years ago.”

“What the fuck is this shit?”

“Look no further than my robot assistant, Alexa.”

“Do you have anything to take the edge off, like… drink - or something?”

“Young man, for the past 27 years, I have been stockpiling the bare essentials needed for human survival in the event of a world-ending cataclysm. You bet your ass we’ve got booze.”

“If I’m gonna die, I’m gonna go out doing the thing I love. Screwing around with another man’s wife.”

“I love him. I know I shouldn’t, but I do.”

“No, Charlotte! This guy is a scumbag. You could upgrade to a sleazeball.”

“Where am I? Why am I tied to a chair?”

“I really don’t wanna die alone in here.”

“How the hell am I supposed to make a Shirley Temple without any cherries?”

“If it’s as serious as all that, I figured we might need a designated driver.”

“If you make one more crack at me, I am gonna… do something to you!”

“I’m gonna kick your- head!”

“I wanna see you kick above your waist.”

“Okay, it was a dumb threat, stop rubbing it in.”

“This is supposed to relax us, not make us kill each other.”

“I’m gonna start a pot farm.”

“Weed’s the future. It’s gonna be legal nationwide soon, bet you any money…!”

“We hated ourselves!”

“We’re gonna kick your ass, and then we’re gonna fucking kick your ass.”

“Sing the beginning of Moana!”

“I didn’t like that movie.”

“Alright. That was terrible.”

“Right now, you need to run and hide.”

“Everything’s going to be fine.”

“I knew we were gonna need a designated driver!”

“You screaming is gonna get us killed.”

“What was I supposed to do? Lie?”

“Whatever I said this morning, I’m sorry.”

“We need to leave right now.”

“Why does it hurt to love you?”

“You let me down again.”

“Wear a watch! Time is a precious thread in the fabric of the universe! It deserves its own tool of measurement!”

“I was trying to save something that could not be saved.”

“I don’t think it can do that…”

“If they hear us, they will kill us!”

“This song’s pretty good, huh?”

“While I’ve been preparing for the apocalypse, I’ve also been writing my own musical.”

“Do you mind if I give you the pitch?”

“We don’t have time…”

“Fuckin’ go for it!”

“Last week feels like ages ago.”

“Five o’clock can’t come soon enough.”

“I can’t wait to get home to my boys.”

“We’ve gotta get out of here while they’re distracted!”

“I say I’d be a better person, I’m still not a good person!”

“Fuck you, Hatchetfield!”

“I hate to say this right now, but this is what seatbelts are for.”

“I don’t know your friends’ fucking names…!”

“Our coffee was shit ‘cause we didn’t care.”

“We’ve been waiting for you, Paul.”

“Is my integrity worth anything at all?”

“You’re sure there were no other survivors?”

“Don’t you want to see me happy?”

“Can I - can I use your phone, please?”

“Why are you clapping?”

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※ DANNY GONZALEZ - “TRYING TROOM TROOM’S AWFUL CRAFTS 3”  ※

starters from danny’s video trying troom troom’s awful crafts 3 ! feel free to change names/pronouns/etc.!

“This is just gonna be a big old mess.”

“Most of them are just awful.”

“They’re always up to some more ridiculous shit.”

“Wow, this is riveting stuff.”

“That one’s weird.”

“Is this some kind of weird porn in disguise?”

“It requires you to dip somebody’s finger in hot glue without them noticing, somehow.”

“No one will suspect a thing when they see you’ve got guns attached to your shoes.”

“That totally won’t put off any alarms in people’s heads.”

“This looks very secretive indeed.”

“Why the fuck do we need to make a big hole in it?”

“I’m gonna give them the benefit of the doubt and we’re gonna do it their way.”

“I need a marker.”

“Okay, I got a marker.”

“Isn’t it bad luck for superstitious people to open up umbrellas indoors?”

“I’m not superstitious, I don’t care.”

“This whole table collapsed.”

“Oh shit, alright…”

“I knew that this was coming, but I was hoping that it was gonna be later.”

“I hate hot glue!”

“Oh, great, the cord isn’t long enough.”

“Ah… the refreshing burn of hot glue on my fingertips.”

“Oh, wait… did I do it wrong?”

“Oh, fuck! God damn it! Ow! It hurts!”

“What’s that? It’s ninety degrees out and not raining?”

“I think that this umbrella might be cursed.”

“What? The mission failed?”

“Wait, so are they just admitting that this doesn’t work?”

“Looks like this one doesn’t fucking work.”

“I’m so confused, why did I just put in all this effort?”

“By the way, don’t actually try this, it’s not gonna work, dude, are you crazy?”

“That umbrella was cursed.”

“Well, this is not good.”

“I’m just gonna pretend like it’s fine.”

“Man, that thing does not look good.”

“Do you give your teachers gifts for Easter?”

“I just bought this pillow at Target. It was $15.”

“What niche scenario is this for?”

“Should this look different?”

“Your boy doesn’t have multi-purpose glue.”

“Look, hot glue is every purpose glue.”

“You better believe that that’s gonna stick.”

“Let’s just assume that that’s gonna stick.”

“Let’s see if it looks like what I hope it does.”

“So, this is great.”

“Wow, this is a disaster.”

“Oh, god, I got fur in my mouth.”

“I can explain…”

“Just carry on… have a good day.”

“I’ll speak with you in a bit.”

“Needless to say, I think she liked it.”

“This is exactly what I wanted.”

“They know that they’ve tricked me.”

“On a scale of one to ten how worried for your own safety would you be?”

“Oh my god! That’s fuckin’ terrifying!”

“I think that this one was a tremendous success.”

“It’s a problem that we all face at times.”

“I know what tongues look like because I am a human.”

“So I got, like, sequins in my mouth.”

“This is, like, constantly almost making me vomit.”

“Man, what the fuck?”

“Fuck yeah, you did it, bitch!”

“It has sparkles on it. And it makes me wanna throw up.”

“I am definitely skeptical.”

“I’m optimistic, so let’s give it a shot.”

“That’s like the worst thing I’ve ever smelled.”

“I think I did a pretty good job with this one, and didn’t rush through it at all.”

“I heard me screaming.”

“It sounded like it did absolutely jack-shit.”

“Thanks for the fun waste of twenty minutes.”

“Please don’t look that up. It is true.”

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——— *  aemulo·  .

“What’s the point of continuing just to lose? It’s smartest to retreat until you’re stronger.” He clutches the wound in his side, hissing in through his teeth.

“Go clown around elsewhere. I don’t have time for this.”

      ❛      HAH—— ...    ❜         well  ,    Kuranchi  couldn’t  exactly  argue  against  that.      boy’s  got  a  point  ,    but  it  was  still  amusing  in  a  way.      still  ,    the  clownery  was  only  starting  !      a  leg  pops  and  snaps  in  a  crude  manner  as  it  dramatically  steps  closer  to  the  other  ,    the  rest  of  his  body  following  suit  in  a  split  second  ,    form  wavering  as  it  snaps  back  into  place  but  he  still  takes  the  sudden  closeness  to  bend  over  and  inspect  the  wound.

      ❛      hrmm ...     pretty  nasty  cut   ya   got   there  !      z’it  hurt  if  i  touchyy  ?     ❜        instantly  ,    a   gloved   hand   darts   forward   and   JABS   at   the   hand  ,    applying   harsh   pressure   on   the   wound.

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@veroxins​ ,  sc ,  YOU’RE AN AWFUL PERSON — R.I.P

    “     YOU’RE  LETTING  EVERYBODY  DOWN  !      ”

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@aemulo​ ,  sc ,  YOU’RE AN AWFUL PERSON — R.I.P

“     so  you  took  the  chance  to  RUN  AWAY   ?     ”  

     “     what  a  SUITABLE  DECISION  for  someone  the  LIKES  of  you   !     ”

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@kyoucopycathero​ ,  sc ,  YOU’RE AN AWFUL PERSON — R.I.P

     “     you   tried   so   hard  ,   but   you’re   the   WORST    !     ”

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@altaindustries​ ,  sc ,  YOU’RE AN AWFUL PERSON — R.I.P

    “     it   seems   you’re   NOTHIN ’   but   a   NUISCANCE  !     ”

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     “     don’tcha   just   LOVE   th ’   smell   of   SMOKE   in   the   mornin ’   ?     ”

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pensive emoji   i’m here

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       ok someone punch me tmrw and tell me to actually get on kuran n do shit ok

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——— *  kyoucopycathero·  .

“I don’t want your gingivitis or whatever.”

        “      don’tcha   worry   yer   pretty   little   head  ,    sweetcheeks   !      the   only   thing   you’ll    be    catchin ’   ‘ round    here    is    FEELIN’S  !——  for    ME ..  !     y - ..  ya   get   it    ?     ”

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everyday ...  i think about how kuranchi named the boy he kidnapped Otokonoko ....

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      here’s    a     fresh    stinkin ’    STARTER   CALL  !     i   may   or   may   not   come   into   ur   IMs   to   plot   uwuwu  !        pls like if ur gonna reply to the starter

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      “      what   if   i   kissed   ya  ....  on   th ’   lips ...  like  ,    right   now   ?      ”

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**Tumbling Feats**

This limited edition print is available for SALE in my Etsy Store. Click HERE. 

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