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Decades of Grace

Nearing the home of our next and final interviewee for this semester, I spotted the door open and by the door at the entrance, we saw who we assumed was a friend of Lola. We could only be surprised to know this senior we'd take to beat their 60s was the 75-year-old Lola Emer awaiting our visit. With this revelation, our anticipation had only heightened by what wisdom Lola would enlighten us to.

"The City of Pines"

Lola sings in pride

Lola was the 3rd child of a family of 12 and was the 2nd eldest daughter. She was born in the Misamis Occidental, where the first 25 years of her life belonged. She recounted the life she had lived with her grandmother and the separation she often faced from her other siblings. Back when before instant technology, they would have to entertain themselves with more exertion and spontaneousness. There were days when her spontaneous adventures would be with her friends as they climbed trees and harvested their own mangoes and bananas. Or maybe wade through tall grasses and mindlessly wander. Or simply reading a book or being in a similar situation as we were with her, except the roles would be reversed with her own grandmother's stories. She'd recount all of this with a glint in her eyes, a bittersweet yet welcomed thoughts of yesterdays.

There in that city, she gained the things that she'd carry throughout her life. In her hometown province, she met her husband of more than 50 years, finished her degree in Basic Education, developed her interest in sewing and crocheting, and strengthened her testimony to her religion and faith in Christ. Yet, however, attached she was to her hometown, she would have to leave and follow her husband to a new city.

The New and Now Pace

When she arrived at Davao City, it was a city at a special pace of development, and in this busy and foreign place she would have to find her place and build a new life she would live. Yet as the bustling city continues to move unapologetic to her worries, there would be no doubt she too will find her momentum along the pace as well. Unbeknownst to her how time would unfold to her building her own family and watch her sons do as well, and how she would live to hundreds of roles as someone who teaches, loves, and inspires in different ways to different people. In Davao, she would continue her profession as a teacher at elementary, would give birth to her three sons, meet her daughters-in-law, and have her grandchildren.

Spontaneity and Passion

Now in her mid-70s Lola's bursting energy had made her glow alike the younger generation passionate in life. Although, clearly her passion for life was of something vastly different, it was a passion born out of decades of being tossed and turned by life.

Despite in retirement, Lola had found herself in a similar situation to her younger self. The part where she would be spontaneous to her entertainment, never sticking to just one routine. On some days she would always find herself being invited over to spend time with her closest friend, on others she would attend local exercise and massage sessions for people her age, there were times she'd be especially invested with her small garden, and on some days she would be invested in renovating her house slowly with her pension. Yet despite all of that, it's not lost to her on indulging in entertainment from the internet. She had kept up with the artists these days, she even showed us her list of Pinoy celebrities to help her keep track. These days she was especially invested in the famous love team "Donbelle" and mentioned how she loved their series titled "He's into Her." But it doesn't stop there, because on YouTube she follows through a charity vlog channel and is still invested most on the love teams formed in the channel. She would run through her love for those media contents with so much laughter and enthusiasm. Almost like she couldn't believe what she had gotten herself invested in. Yet her days don't end there. In high times of her day, she would play music to either sing along or dance to it punctuating just how much energy she had to live as merrily as she could at her age.

Moving and Thriving

Truly for her age Lola was one with notable energy, and we were eager to know her secret. Yet her answer could not be any more simple. She moved around and exercised her body however she could, may it be her walks to visit a friend, the exercise massage sessions she attended, performing chores, and indulging in hobbies. It was how she would avoid just letting her days consecutively pass with her just sitting around. Additionally, she made sure to often cook vegetables for herself and her grandchildren for a healthy diet. She never passed on any opportunity to buy the fruits she would pass by and indulge in them later. It was how automatic it was for her to move and exercise and prioritize a good diet that had served her the most in her successful physique.

In Quiet Measures

As excited she was when she welcomed us she would eventually admit of her tendencies to shy away from talking too much. Especially in her earlier stages, she never described herself as someone who would exert too much effort in catching everyone's attention with what she would say. She would comfortably stay silent and give her own two cents now and then. This was not to say her circle of friends was little. She had gained the trust of many for her to have such the privilege of constantly being invited to gatherings and short meet-ups. On Sundays, she would be active in their church gatherings such as small parties or bible studies. In contrast to how unpredictably her week would often fly, her Sundays are always constant. Because on that day her attention was on their church and their gatherings. There the community was what she held dear that is why she would try her best to not miss such activities.

As for her husband. Her husband had recently passed away with dementia. When describing her relationship with him, she wouldn't deny how there was love for him, especially in the early years but undeniably what was between their relationship grew to become different other than love. When recounting him, she spoke with much kindness and gratitude for the lack of vices and his nonexistent abuse of her. These were the traits she held dear to him as she looked at other wives who would be in unfortunate circumstances.

Words of Wisdom

When our interview was winding down we simply couldn't let a chance to hear Lola's wisdom pass.

"Ayaw gyd mo pagpalabi" "Too much of everything can kill you"

It was her saying to never indulge in anything too much, you have to keep a loose grip on it. Because if you help on too tight it would wound right through your skin. And it's going to hurt even more when the time to let go comes and your wound is exposed and out in the open will make it hurt even more.

"Sa ginoo lang gyd salig."

Indeed faith had played so much role in her life and she testifies to the hope it brought to her. This hope is something she wishes most people would hold on to, too, as well.

"Sometimes eat dirt"

At some point one of her grandchildren chimed in and shared that this was something her grandmother would say when they were getting picky on the food presented. The grandchild continues to humorously share how this wisdom was easy to take lightly, but it was one that stood out because it was one she would often say unseriously and often with a strong accent.

Whose Voices Hold Decades of Experience

Books pile up, songs added in playlists, movies watched and cried over. Little in our list are stories of people who hold great wisdom with decades of experience in this playing field we call life.

A few hours does not do enough justice to be fully enlightened by Lola's life. There's so much to learn about how from her words and experiences.

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The Middle Mosaic: Piecing Together Purpose and Growth

Midlife, the period of life between young adulthood and late adulthood — a place where the past and future collide in unexpected ways. For Lini, this phase feels like standing on the edge of something new, yet tethered to all that has come before. The pressures of career, family, and personal milestones intensify, yet there’s a subtle undercurrent of change, a quiet stirring of “What's next?” It’s a time where old assumptions are challenged, and new ambitions take root. Middle adulthood isn’t just a transition; it’s a chance to rewrite the script, to confront the unknown with curiosity, and to embrace the untapped potential of a life still unfolding.

The Hidden Shifts of Body, Mind, and Emotion

In middle adulthood, Lini experienced several physical changes, like gaining weight more easily and seeing more white hair, but overall, He still felt strong and energetic. Despite these changes, He rarely gets tired easily and can keep up with his daily tasks and activities without much effort. To maintain his strength, he always incorporates regular exercise into his routine, such as bicycling and walking in the morning, which helps him stay flexible and energized throughout the day. Lini also focuses on eating balanced meals but he always drinks coffee whenever he gets the chance to, while making sure to get enough rest. Although he faces some health concerns like joint stiffness and high blood pressure, he remains active by walking daily and sometimes using traditional remedies like herbal teas. Lini finds great satisfaction in continuing to help with household chores, spending time outdoors with his family, and doing outdoor activities. These activities not only keep him physically fit but also help Lini enjoy life more, especially now that he can fully appreciate the benefits of bicycling walking, and other mindful exercises.

Lini’s cognitive abilities have strengthened, particularly in his decision-making and problem-solving. He has been a taxi driver for years, his experience has helped him navigate the city, remember routes, and manage multiple tasks at once. Balancing his work with family responsibilities, such as helping his children with their schoolwork and managing household finances, has sharpened his thinking and made him more adaptable. However, Lini does face challenges, such as occasional difficulty recalling names or details after a long shift. Managing both his job and family life can be mentally tiring, and He sometimes struggles to keep up with the new technologies his kids are familiar with. To cope, He takes breaks and stays mentally active with activities like watching daily news and engaging in conversations with his family. Despite these challenges, Lini finds great satisfaction in his cognitive growth. He is confident in making decisions, whether at work or home, and he enjoys helping his children while learning from them. The balance between Lini's professional life as a taxi driver and his role as a father has kept his mind sharp, and He is proud of how he adapted to this stage of life.

Lini’s role in the family has shifted significantly. Supporting his children’s education and well-being. These roles bring a deep sense of fulfillment in him, though they also come with challenges, particularly in balancing time and emotional energy. He finds it rewarding to offer advice and guidance to younger family members, but the emotional weight of having more responsibilities can sometimes make him overwhelmed. Despite these challenges, Lini manages stress by spending quality time with his loved ones, practicing meditation, and seeking comfort in his cultural traditions. These practices help him stay grounded. He cherishes the moments spent with his family, especially during shared meals and celebrations. Lini said that it’s deeply satisfying to see his children or relatives succeed, just like his oldest daughter has recently graduated and is also the very first Cum Laude in his family, and knows that he played a role in supporting them. As Lini grew older, his emotional resilience improved, allowing him to handle difficult situations with more patience and wisdom. Lini learned to take time for himself, ask for help when needed, and remain focused on the things that truly matter.

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Fragments of Becoming

"Serenade of the Waves"

Bathed in sunlight, salt-filled breeze and her feet burrowed in the sand, Jhosel took a brief step out of her reality of antiseptic smells and bright artificial lights. Her demeanor showed the scenery's soothing effect on her as she basked in the sound of the waves and took the chance to unload experiences she claimed she rarely had chance to share.

Jhosel graduated in 2023 with a Bachelor's Degree in Medical Laboratory Science. In early 2024, she officially became a Registered Medical Technologist and entered a workforce aligned with her field. Currently, she is preparing for her next step: applying to medical school internationally. Despite how far she has come and what she plans to achieve, she still feels the weight of being "so little" in the world of adulthood. While it overwhelms her whenever her age is mentioned, she can’t escape her reality—and wouldn’t want to. Despite nostalgia for the innocence of childhood, she embraces her current reality with a breath of fresh air, finding freedom and rhythm in her journey.

"Runner Number 0211"

What Jhosel once thought she couldn’t prioritize or see the significance of was the very thing she chose to challenge herself with the moment she finished college. College life demanded much from her intellectually, physically, and time-wise, so running was never a focus. But on September 23, Jhosel completed a marathon after months of hard work. Running challenged her ability to control her breathing and build endurance, but it also required discipline in her diet and early-morning routines. Though she didn’t believe she could achieve such self-discipline, her success tells a different story. Yet, crossing that finish line also marked the end of this phase; running wasn’t a hobby she wanted to continue. Nonetheless, the experience was dear and life-changing in ways beyond the activity itself.

"Treasures of Thought"

Finishing college gave her time to indulge in other hobbies. She was particularly glad to find time to think and write, adding to her collection of notebooks filled with poems and reflections. She also reopened anonymous accounts to share her thoughts, offering comfort and personal insights to others. She continued to build her collection of solved puzzles and reassembled Rubik's cubes. Yet, despite this, a feeling of emptiness lingers. Her craving for continuous learning isn’t as fulfilled as it was while actively working. She even opened herself to the idea of enrolling in a local college to take a course completely unrelated to her field. This manifestation of her continuous desire to actively engage in learning would have been fulfilled had she not been advised to focus on her applications.

"Just keep doing your best and eventually the right people will appreciate and congratulate you."

My Family

“Back then, I was annoyed by my parents' strict rules, but now I realize they taught me self-control. Like when my friends invite me to certain gatherings, I can make sound decisions by considering if the situation might be dangerous or not.”

The Church

“I love the church and the values taught there. Growing up active in the church helped me develop a charitable side. I’m sure the church influenced my ambitions in my field because I really want to help people, especially in medical missions. I want to be able to participate and do more. The church also helped me understand my parents; I might not have understood their strictness otherwise. But the church gave me principles and values.”

My Experiences with People

Jhosel admitted that she recently had experiences that were emotionally challenging. They intensified her desire for external validation—she wanted to show that she was doing well without certain people in her life. Painful experiences can make us bitter without us realizing it. Finding clarity, she now compares it to “breaking free from a chokehold, realizing that the arms holding me were actually my own.” She no longer seeks external validation, saying, "Life is so much better without seeking validation from them."

Most people in her past may have stayed in the past (even versions of those people), but it's the multitude of her interaction with them that had made her to be who she is now. And recently she laments over the thought of having so little opportunity to engage with them with time and space against her. Despite this, she relishes with the memories she shared with them and finds these years in her life an opportunity to focus on her self and less on her social obligations.

"I'm 24, but I feel like I'm still a kid"

An MLS graduate, an RMT, and now a Med Tech professional aiming for med school, Jhosel’s journey is filled with life-changing decisions. She has seen long-term dreams fall apart, some delayed, and others still uncertain. But she's here now, taking one step at a time. Erik Erikson’s theory emphasizes adolescence as the peak phase for identity exploration, yet Jhosel's story reminds us that self-discovery is a lifelong process. We often crave clarity in our future, but there’s freedom in being lost.

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Embracing Independence

"Ry’s Adolescence: Navigating the Ups and Downs of Growing Up"

Being 19 is a unique phase of life, my professor once said being in adolescence, you are in the middle of being a child and an adult. Caught between the carefree days of childhood and the looming responsibilities of adulthood. As Ry explores this transitional period, she finds herself facing numerous challenges and discoveries that shape who she is becoming.

Physical Changes and Self-Discovery One of the most significant aspects of Ry’s journey has been coming to terms with her physical self. She noticed changes in her body - gaining weight, feeling tired more easily, and experiencing frequent back pain. These changes have shifted her preferences; She now finds herself gravitating towards rest rather than the outdoor activities she once enjoyed. Perhaps the most profound physical milestone she has been understanding is her sexual orientation. She grappled with confusion about her gender identity and sexuality, and realized that she was bisexual. Her self-discovery, while freeing, she stated that it had also been overwhelming. It's not just about understanding herself, but also about facing potential judgment and societal pressures. Emotional Rollercoaster Emotionally, she found herself on a constant rollercoaster. Mood swings have become a regular part of her life, especially around her period when irritability peaks. Ry noticed she gets easily irritated and finds many things that are annoying to her, particularly when people disturb her during these sensitive times. Becoming inactive on social media during difficult times or gloomy days has become her habit. Disappearing from online platforms and seeking out places to unwind serves as her coping mechanism. Hearing her response to my question about this helps me understand her better. At some point in my life, I also wanted to do this, but couldn't due to school-related responsibilities. Cognitive Growth and Decision Making Ry stated that she observed significant changes in how she approaches life. While Ry used to be more optimistic, she now finds herself more hesitant in making decisions. She also becomes more analytical, trying to reason through everything. This shift is partly due to the realization that her decisions now have a more significant impact on her life compared to when she was younger. Time management has become a crucial skill she had stated, especially with the pressures of her job as a call center agent. She is learning to prioritize what's truly important and to balance her life’s relationship with her family and friends to avoid conflicts. Social Dynamics and Independence While Ry values her friendships deeply, especially during challenging times, she also finds herself needing personal space occasionally. Her relationship with her family remains typical, with a certain emotional distance that seems common in many families. As she grows, she is embracing independence more fully. Ry is making her decisions without parental control and exploring life on her own terms. This independence extends to her goals; She is striving to achieve them by herself while being open to others' help. Looking Forward Despite the challenges she had, there's an undeniable excitement in this phase of life. She is dreaming big while slowly carving out her own path to independence. Ry’s journey of self-discovery, though sometimes difficult, is leading her towards deeper clarity and confidence. As Ry continues to explore as an adolescent, she is learning to embrace the changes, face the challenges, and celebrate the discoveries. It's a complex, sometimes overwhelming, but ultimately rewarding journey of becoming who she meant to be.

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Laughter's Secrets

Entering the place of Alexis' s comfort

Our first sight of him turned into a quick glimpse of his persona before he ran in fits of giggles, and the Heavy sigh escaping from both of us signaled the beginning of a long and challenging interview ahead. Having him sit down in comfort for us was a challenge, yet it was another challenge to keep him settled. Thus, our first 3 minutes with him were an attempt to bargain with his favorite food, fries. A pinky swear later, he became more cooperative with our request, though eventually, his infectious giggles had us pause our interview to laugh his stories out.

"Who doesn't"

On a Monday afternoon, Alexis had just finished school for the day as a 5th grader. We started by asking him how he thought of school "School is boring." He further explained he would rather stay at home and use the phone the whole time. He then added: "Except for Art and Music. Other subjects are boring." he said in resignation before- "I LOVE MATH. Carry, times, plus." "All my classmates love math," he claimed, causing me and my partner to eye each other in shock. Yet despite this enthusiasm for the subjects, he had never dared attend extracurricular activities. When we asked if he were ever willing to dance, sing, or draw in front of us for an unlimited supply of fries he still wouldn't let go of his shyness for his favorite snack.

"If you eat my fries I will punch you"

Speaking of snacks, his endless love for fries may end with his shyness, but it was proven persistent when we kept offering him other food. Even when enjoyed sweets and fruits, they turned gray at the sight of fries. And when we asked about his favorite sport he would often use the words "some" and hand gesture "" to express his interest in both volleyball and soccer. At school, he shared that he and his friends would often play around violently (such as punching each other) as their odd interpretation of "fun." But the physical activity he mostly loved to play was racing with his best friend, which we will rename as John.

John's name was recurrent from him. He would describe him as his best friend despite John being 5 years old. It was at a point where he would rather spend time with John rather than use phones at all. Yet, when we asked how he would feel if John would eventually have to leave for good how would he feel? "Nothing, sad and happy. cause no more annoying." Yet despite his occasional teasing on the thought of his friend, John was the friend he was most sure of when he wasn't so sure of his "friends" at school.

"I will marry a rich woman and hope she will die sooner, so I will give the money to my mother"

At home is just him, his mother, their dogs, and cats together. With his mother making ends meet, Alexis was often left at home. Yet as often as this was it still elicited a whine or sometimes a cry from him. When his mother had joined us for a while in the interview, she would jokingly claim his constant yapping when she took him with her would sometimes lead to fights and even punches thrown by him. Despite this dynamic expressed, Alexis was more than willing to hurt anyone who would hurt his mother.

With his mother around he would confirm what my partner and I had been assuming. He had a hard time reading and writing. It was a challenge he hated, thus why he wouldn't (even if in exchange for infinite supplies of fries) read a book. It wasn't only that he expressed disappointment. He had claimed to be a sort of special child, claiming he acts, thinks, and looks like a 1st grader. Even his mother didn't know where he had gotten this idea from, but it proved to be an emotional and sensitive topic for Alexis when we saw tears gathering in his eyes, whilst he grinned widely at his mother.

His mother would later on reveal he used to be bullied, and when we asked if he still was he turned silent. His mother would proceed to apologize on his behalf for his tendency to be unclear about what was happening in his life. Some of his statements were contradictory, and avoidant, and most of the time he would just use the word "no," "sometimes," "a little bit," and "yes."

"I will prank you soon. I have an idea."

In our salutations, Alexis would turn to us and give us unique names in recognition of us being his new friends. And when he'd utter the threatening words; Despite fear, amusement bubbled up. From all the horror movies he had seen, it seemed this was where his idea of pranking and jumpscaring was fun and recreational. It was something he prided himself off despite everything else.

"HAHAHAHAH"

Alexis's character was far from what we had expected from a 10-year-old. From the infectious giggles to his weird concept of fun to unexpected tear-jerking realizations from his stories; his story is one we hope will eventually become better with Alexis never losing his smile.

[yellowcrispycake]

Little Artful Soul

Stepping Into Amarah’s Journey of Scribbles and Growth

At the age of 5, Amarah found her love for drawing, often surprising her caregivers with intricate pictures of her imaginary world. Even though she is still a kindergarten her caregiver never had any concerns about her behavior. She has always been a kind of child who is naturally well-behaved and responsible which is unexpectedly unfit for her age.

“Color color na iyang ganahan jud”

Aside from scribbling, Amarah also loves to use crayons and cut her drawings making them like paper dolls. “Sige na silag palitan sa iyang papa ug coloring book”. Whenever she doesn’t have anything to do, she always takes her time to color her coloring book. After finishing, she would always show and brag about it to her caregiver.

“Oo, ma excited sya pag nay assignment”

Whenever we get an assignment after class, we usually groan and complain about the extra work. It's a common sentiment among students, a shared feeling of dread that accompanies the announcement of homework. However, Amarah  is a notable exception. Instead of taking it as a burden, she approaches her assignments with a sense of excitement and anticipation. It gives her a sense of satisfaction even though she is still not good at writing but she always puts her best effort to improve. She would excitedly tell her caregiver that she has an assignment, Amarah sees this as an opportunity to grow and learn, her enthusiasm makes her caregiver proud.

“Maulaw sya kapag dili niya kaila”

It’s common for children to be very shy in front of strangers and it is the same for Amarah. She usually has an outgoing personality when it comes to children her age like her classmates which is her way of greeting “pag makita niya iyang classmate, ginahug dayon niya”. She is a curious kid who constantly asks people at her home questions, often in a way that makes her sound like an old lady. However, when it comes to strangers, she would just keep quiet and doesn’t move that much which indicates her discomfort towards her surroundings. Whenever she’s alone, she always plays by herself like playing with cooking toys and sometimes watches videos on a cellphone to pass the time.

“Pag naa ra siyay kauban nga bata sa balay”

Amarah doesn’t spend much time running around; instead, she prefers to focus on what she enjoys most—drawing, coloring, and watching her favorite shows. The only person she could play with was her older sister but when they are not on good terms, Amarah would likely be an assertive type of kid she would stand up for herself whenever they had an argument.

Her caregiver often takes her to the park and she would probably be at the sliding station despite the fact that Amarah is not that playful. Sometimes her mom would be worried about her. The only challenge her caregiver faces is when Amarah sometimes refuses to eat her packed lunch because she needs someone to feed her. Nevertheless, her caregiver maintains that she would be healthy. Amarah’s favorite fruit was grapes and apples. She regularly takes vitamins that support her growth and overall well-being.

Despite her being left at home with her grandma she just waits until her parents come home and would just tell them “sabi mo mag uwi kayo ka agad” without throwing tantrums.

"As the sun sets on these formative years, the seeds of curiosity and connection continue to grow."

Each moment spent exploring the world, asking questions, and forming relationships lays the groundwork for a bright future. These early experiences shape not only the knowledge and skills they acquire but also the emotional bonds that will carry them through life. While this chapter may be closing, the lessons learned and the memories created will forever illuminate their path, guiding them toward a lifetime of discovery and connection.

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Milestones from Tiny Steps

Farah

Infancy is a remarkable period of rapid development. From a helpless 5-pound newborn to a child who can crawl, stand, walk, and utter simple words, the first year is filled with nonstop physical, cognitive, and socioemotional changes. Farah, who recently turned one, stands at 75 cm tall and weighs 24 pounds. We had the privilege of inquiring about her development and observing her ourselves.

"Dagan. Mao gyd na iyaha, mag dagan-dagan permi"

Her caretaker shared that Farah is constantly running, both inside and outside the house. We witnessed this firsthand—though her running isn't perfectly balanced, she is always on the move. When she's not running, she's either in her room with her father, jumping on the bed, or actively exploring her surroundings. We had the chance to see how strong her grip was in a comedic scene between her and her older brother in a fight, her older brother would attempt to take her food away from her, yet she would fight back herself. She held on firmly, refusing to let go without a fight.

"Daghan na pd na siyay na hibaw-an"

Farah is not only mastering physical skills like running but also honing her speaking abilities. Her mother proudly shared stories of Farah attempting to speak. These developing skills have expanded her access to her environment, allowing her to explore and solve problems on her own. While it's heartening to see her curiosity and problem-solving abilities, it also raises concerns, especially if she's left alone.

Another concern arose when we learned that Farah was never breastfed and has been fed formula since birth. She has recently been introduced to solid foods but still relies heavily on milk, supplemented with vitamins like Cherifer and Propan.

"Ahhh Basta Kiat gyd na"

Observing Farah's emotional state was particularly intriguing. Her mother mentioned that handling Farah in public was rarely a challenge—she wasn’t the type to cause a scene with constant crying. In fact, her mother described her as 'malipayon and kiat kaayo na bata.' This was fascinating to us, especially when we observed her environment, where there wasn’t much stimulation or entertainment available. Even with strangers, Farah was initially shy and reserved, but once she felt comfortable, her boundless energy took over.

Outside their home, Farah had playmates in the neighborhood and even interacted with their live chickens in the yard. Their conversations? We could only imagine how wild Farah’s imagination must have been. Despite being so active, she had a strong preference for using phones. If it was taken away, she would burst into tears and kick in protest. Interestingly, Farah’s energetic side only emerged when there was no phone around for entertainment

"The First of Many to Come"

As psychology students, it's fascinating to observe a child from a new perspective—one that deeply appreciates the crucial moments of childhood and the significant role of the environment and caregivers. Capturing this phase of Farah's life, we hope she continues to grow with the positive traits we've seen in her. There's still so much ahead, and as important as the first year is, Farah and her caregivers still have many opportunities to positively shape her future.

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Forty and Expecting

A woman in her 40s

At the mention of her age, we were immediately intrigued on what lies more. "This is my 3rd pregnancy, but my first with my current husband. My first child was unfortunately taken away when they were barely two, while my 2nd child is a 16-year-old girl focused on school— Was this pregnancy expected? Yes!" She asserts confidently. "We have been planning this with my husband and preparing in our own ways. Preparing in a sense of my physical well-being, I'm well aware of the risk of being pregnant at my age, and the last thing I want is to have a cesarean delivery with this child." We were further impressed on her dedication evident as she elaborated on the restraints of her diets and vitamin regimen for both her and the baby. She was even unabashed to share her practicing how she would push whenever she's in restrooms.

Let's Get Typical

" Pregnancy often comes with well-known symptoms like ‘pregnancy brain’ and persistent cravings. What are your experiences with that?” We asked

"Talong (Eggplant). biskan unsa nga pagkaluto: fried, torta, sinabaw, ginisa. Basta kay Talong, kay dali lang usapon ug tunlon."

"Ug sa mga pag huna.x nako, di gyd ko ka deny nga naa gyd dili maayo akong mahuna-huna usahay. Maonang sa first trimester nako kay sige ra ko sa balay, dili ko ganahan mag guwas, magpakita sa uban, biskan pa'g cellphone. Dili ko. Kay mo iwas ko sa lain na pag huna.x."

"Ug sa kanang sa mga pagkatanga ug lutang. Oo, naa gyd na siya. Di gyd na maiwasan."

"Hangak siya-- dali lang ko hangakon"

Walking presents its own set of challenges for her, as the pain from her bloated veins makes each step a struggle. At night, cramps disrupt her sleep, making even a good night’s rest elusive, especially when frequent trips to the bathroom add to her discomfort. The drowsiness and fatigue from her condition make the thought of long-distance walking or travel unappealing, with even short strolls feeling exhausting.

Yet, amidst these difficulties, the support she receives brings moments of immense comfort. The simple acts of her husband helping with her clothing, assisting her in the bath, or guiding her through walks are cherished. She describes these as "priceless moments.” appreciating how he is always at her beck and call, providing care and companionship through every challenge.

"Siyempre apil pd sila pamilya nako ga adjust"

Pregnancy is known for its unique emotional changes, and Ate Kath was no exception. Sudden bursts of emotion often caught her off guard, leaving her puzzled about their origin until she realized they stemmed from subconscious fatigue and the overwhelming nature of her situation. These mood swings extended beyond occasional breakdowns, affecting her relationships as well.

During her first trimester, not only was Ate Kath adjusting, but so were those around her. They had to adapt to her increased need for support and her heightened emotional vulnerability. She shared how these adjustments led to multiple conflicts with her husband. Even her daughter, excited as she was for her future sibling, found the wait and changes challenging. Yet, we sensed Ate Kath’s gratitude toward her daughter for choosing to understand, often seeking guidance from her aunts to better comprehend her mother’s state.

Over time, with persistent communication, the fights with her husband subsided. He became more understanding and considerate, transitioning from a source of stress to a shoulder to lean on after tiring days. This emotional support was crucial for Ate Kath, helping her persevere through the pregnancy. Without it, she admitted, her stress levels might have exceeded the borderline.

As a result, interactions with strangers that escalated to frustration or anger, especially with customers, didn’t bother her as much. She would eventually calm down, let it go, and even apologize if she realized her mistake. What stood out most about Ate Kath was her mindset—negativity didn’t matter much if it didn’t involve her family. She wasn’t troubled by not keeping up with distant friends, feeling thankful instead for having her family close by when she needed them.

Her friends at the store also understood her situation and adjusted accordingly, aware of the risks she faced being pregnant at her age.

“kanus-a pani mahuman?”

When we face suffering and pain, this is a common thought that arises. When our runny nose gets clogged up, during a terrible sore throat, or even having a mere hiccup; during those circumstances we recall the times when simple acts like breathing, drinking, and talking were effortless.

This reflection becomes even more poignant in extreme situations when you find yourself kneeling in the bathroom, emptying your stomach with each wave of nausea, or when even picking up a sock and getting dressed feels like an ordeal, When breakdowns become a daily routine, you're restrained from the joys of traveling and meeting up with friends from another part of town, the challenges can seem overwhelming.

These multitude of challenges all rolled up to the conception of a life, it would surprise me that everyone who has been in this situation never once had a slight thought of regret. Well, we didn't get surprised with Ate Kath because she did, especially in the first trimester. Yet, even with these thoughts, they were just but fleeting. Instead of dwelling on what she’s lost, she looks forward with hope. After all, rest isn't solely a privilege of yesterday—tomorrow holds the promise of respite too. And with that rest comes the reward for enduring the divine journey of bringing a new life into the world.

"ma okay rani, mahuman lang ni, ma okay nako, and mo abot na siya. Lahi napud siya na mga challenges ug adjustments, Oo. Pero in the end worth it gihapon tanan."

[yellowcrispycake]

Life-Span Perspective

In the midst of our own bustling lives, moving from one personal challenge to another, it might seem overwhelming to consider the lives of others. Yet here we are—Nur-Sylen and Francine, 2nd-year Psychology students at Davao Doctors College, currently enrolled in Developmental Psychology for the first semester sy 2024-2025. From the very first day of class, we were already briefed on our tasks to interview and observe particular people at different stages of life.

This account is dedicated to all our participants who trusted us with their stories. We aim to curate your shared experiences into enlightening glimpses of your lives. As Psychology students, we hope to honor the parts of your lives you so bravely entrusted to us to share.