yes-you-know-who-i-am - Tumblr blog

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

I’ve been told that now you kiss with your eyes open, because if you close them… You see me…

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

I’ll never be…

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

I have always loved everything about you. Even what I didn’t understand.

Albert Camus - The Misunderstanding.

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

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I choose to love you in silence because in silence I find no rejection, and in silence no one owns you but me.

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

Near the entrance, a patch of tall grass.
Near the tall grass, long-stemmed plants, each bending an ear-shaped cone to the pond’s surface.

If you looked closely, you could make out silvery koi
swishing toward the clouded pond’s edge, where a boy tugs at his mother’s shirt for a quarter to buy fish food.

And watching that boy, as he knelt down to let the koi kiss his palms, I missed what it was to be so dumb as those koi.

I like to think they’re pure, that that’s why even after the boy’s palms were empty, after he had nothing else to give, they still kissed his hands. Because… Who hasn’t done that?.

Loved so intently even after everything
has gone?. Loved something that has washed its hands of you?.

I like to think I’m different now, that I’m enlightened somehow… But who am I kidding?.

I know I’m like those koi, still, with their popping mouths, that would kiss those hands again if given the chance…

So dumb.

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

“Everyday I'm reminded how I fucked up .. so sorry but you can't make me feel any worse then I make myself.... So seriously... Stop trying ... Stop messaging me cause your just continuing to kill yourself and using me as excuse to do so... I would hand you the bullet after blowing my brains out and spilling all those memories of us on your carpet so you could use the same one to help yourself entirely.....”

365 days since the day I died. You won.

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You entered the bedroom and fell to your knees. I wait the rest of my life to hear you say “I made a mistake”.

Inside my chest, a mangle.
Inside yours, a deflating balloon.

I would like to say that at least we perfected
entrances and exits, like professional stage actors honing their craft, but even that is a fantasy.


Mostly on TV the lions ate the hyenas, but sometimes the hyenas formed a posse, and tore a lion up.

Occasionally you came in out of the rain, and I was glad to have you.

Our Many Never Endings…

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Hungry bunny

[yes-you-know-who-i-am]

I thought we were unbreakable, like a hurricane tearing through the world, leaving a trail of destruction in our wake. But I guess storms fade, and so did we. Now, I'm left standing in the aftermath, trying to piece together the fragments of my soul, the remnants of a love that couldn't stand the test of time…