Statistics
We looked inside some of the posts by yikesajax-deranged-edition and here's what we found interesting.
Average Info
Notes Per Post
1
Likes Per Post
1
Reblog Per Post
0
Reply Per Post
0
Time Between Posts
5 days
Number of Posts By Type
Text
7
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
Hackers stole 65M passwords from Tumblr in 2013.
Text
Funny how you don't know a person until you're on their bad side
#aka ahaha wow roar was RIGHT#toxic ex fp tried reaching back out and hah. not to brag but *slicks back hair* *pulls on suit* i set boundaries 🤭#basically cussed them out because im having the worst day and they were being super shitty and told them to please stop trying to drag us-#-back in. they played the “i dont remember calling you a retard :(” card. girl stfu#broo. might never talk to anyone ever again this was so terrible. fully got rid of all contact though and feel like i can breathe again#gonna go soak in the tub and dream about having a friend who i can actually trust and wont break me down and wont be terrible ✌️🤪
0 notes
Text
It's so funny they call me toxic while sending me threats and trying to doxx me and harass me. Girl what 😭
#i cant believe i loved them. realizing how used i was now and so fucking mad i let myself fall into that same pattern AGAIN#having the worst day too (pet died) and its just like... cmon man. one fucking day#i dont know if i wanna kill them or myself#mainly just wanna curl up in a ball for awhile but my stupid fucking legs cant do that or my knees dislocate so all i can do is lay in an#UNSATISFYING AND MEDIOCRE FETAL POSITION#ahem. anyways#still don't get what i did wrong to make them hate me so much. they are constantly losing friends and i was the one bitch who stuck#i tried so hard man. theyre so close minded though and keep a terrible headspace and constantly put me down and just... ugh#istg need more christian friends. not cause of religion but just so i can start quoting jesus at them when they start treating me like shit#the way they treated me for religion still bugs me a lot. treated me like an idiot. always tried to one up me (???)#im like ayo maybe don't say things that are extremely offensive to my religion i have extreme ocd and it genuinely throws me into episodes#but sure guess me trying to remove negativity from the conversation was being “holier than thou” and “opinionated”#like how many times did i tiptoe around you so i wouldn't trigger you and you cant even bite your tongue saying blasphemous shit#it aint about religion its about not saying really bad shit that makes people uncomfortable. but fuck me ig#anyways im just. so so fucked up right now. im exhausted#AND I HAVE BEEN SO HEALTHY! IVE BEEN AVOIDING THEM!! AND! THEY!!! STILL!!!! ARE IN MY FACE!!! Let me break stalking habits in peace PLEASE
0 notes
Text
HOLY FUCK I HATE THEM
#never hated someone like this before. screw being civil theyre fucking stalking me#bitch im the one with ocd why you so obsessed with me 🙄#this shits fucking crazy lmao
0 notes
Text
Giggling cause my ex is whining about me making vague posts about them on my old vent blog. Like sorry?? I TOLD you it's where I sort through my thoughts and feelings and it doesn't mean shit. Didn't even acknowledge that I had real reasons to be upset when they were playing with my emotions constantly. Maybe they shouldn't have been following such a personal thing??? I TOLD them I have BPD, I told them my symptoms and how I can get, so why the fuck are they acting like I abused them when all I did was ask them if we were still on the same page once (which I nonetheless asked if they were fine with me needing reassurance before, and they said yes, so??). God forbid someone gets upset after you've slowly broken down their self esteem by calling them stupid and ugly for months, OF COURSE I GOT UPSET. I just... Idk, what did they want from me? I did everything to be open and honest and make sure that THEY were comfortable, meanwhile they just used me for an ego boost. Why do I fall so hard for such terrible people? Why am I bad for just fucking loving someone and being hurt? Why am I always the bad guy? I don't think I did anything wrong, so why am I being called toxic? I communicated, told them how I can be, tried to take steps to pull myself back when I felt like I was drowning, but they wouldn't fucking listen. When you have an fp there has to be mutual cooperation, we both have to meet in the middle. I'm just so fucking tired, I really tried my best.
#giggling aka crying because what the fuck. bitch out here trying to dox me and calling me toxic meanwhile its just because i cried too much#and I WAS CRYING AND BREAKING DOWN FOR A GOOD REASON! THEY TREATED ME LIKE ABSOLUTE SHIT#feel so hopeless. ill never be in a relationship that doesn't feel like im actively dying. people like hurting me too much#fuck i hope they're miserable. i dont really i wish them the best because i still love them but right now i hope they have a terrible day#im glad they dont have anyone in their life that really cares beyond surface level like i did. im glad they are empty and unlovable and vile#i saw the red flags. i knew they were an asshole but i thought maybe it would be okay. dont know what i expected from a narcissist#no hate to anyone else with npd though ily all. its just that they hid behind that diagnosis and blamed bad behavior on it#which is technically true but they didn't even try to be better and couldn't lend the same forgiveness when my bpd made me all sad and small#god i cant believe they were in my house. in my bed. that they met my parents. i did it again didnt i? i gotta stop letting people in#at least my dog really likes using the stuffed animals they gave me as chew toys. it was worth it to see him happy#he's been with me through a deeply abusive (every form in the books) relationship before and it traumatized him too i think#i just wish i would stop subjecting my family and pets to this shit. next person that wants to get into my life better be waiting years#ive put my loved ones through too much. put MYSELF through too much#i had almost moved on but them with that stupid fucking comment... like ripping stitches open#at least today was already shit. been sick so ive been laying around
0 notes
Text
Dude I really gotta let the shit with my ex fp go, was having a great time with my bf and ended up getting sucked into scrolling their twitter instead and oh look at that, they are dating someone new. Again. Even though they are not at ALL able to have a healthy relationship. And fucking trust me because I tried dating them twice. Just amazes me that they are able to immediately go get someone new after JUST throwing me aside, ain't even been a month
#probably sounds weird so for clarification we were friends for the past few months. we had dated years ago. ive been dating my bf for...#almost 2 years?#i should be obsessed with my bf but ig thats how it is when you latch on to someone who reminds you of your abuser#changing my thinking from im the bad person to damn im actually a victim is odd but helpful#hell some random friend of theirs just straight up said while we were dating that they were being abusive to me and... well#looking back i dont think theyre wrong. it just isnt the WORST abuse ive faced and i kinda put myself there#but they KNEW my mental problems and i really feel like they took advantage#my fawning ass was just narc supply for them 😃👍#cutely watches as they slowly burn through another group of friends and lovers#i tried to give them the benefit of the doubt but all the signs were there#theyre just a fucking user. bleed everyone dry until they get tired and do something to piss them off#glad i cut them off. i think it was the best i could do for myself after trying to make it work for so long. i didn't deserve that treatment#that super hard to say because bleagh self esteem but my body said this isnt right and if its stressing my body out I'm taking care of it#my body has been through enough. im the driver of the car and its my job to take good care of it for both our sake#i just... i deserve more than the bottom feeder. i deserve to be loved as much as i love everyone. i have to be worth it#im tired of letting others take my worth. each failed attempt drags me a little lower#just really tired and confused. why am i so unlovable? its funny. i told them im easy to hate. bet they believe me now#lol fuck them that shit was so crazy. glad im already starting to heal now that that part of my life is fully closed#brought up a lot of ugly stuff with my other ex (who was actually physically abusive) and i think im only just now recovering#but im recovering! so thats good! or im drowning my sorrows in empty meaningless video games...#but i dont cry constantly anymore! i just hold it all like they both wanted me to! im fine! great really! :)
1 note
·
View note
Text
Yippee! Made my pinned post so now I can vent! Except now I'm gonna pass out because I used too much of my braincells
0 notes
Text
Ayo, it's AJ, come breathe in the steaming shit that is my grand vent blog! Oh, that other vent blog I have? @yikes-ajax-thats-sad ? Ahah... I don't use that anymore because of some bs drama I got into with a friend. God forbid I have emotions (so toxic of me 😔). At least now I don't have to sugarcoat so much!
Main is @yikes-ajax ! I pretend I'm normal there <3
Quick info
- I am an adult, may occasionally post 18+ content, minors are discouraged to interact with this blog AT ALL
- Bisexual, taken (it's complicated), genderfluid, and typically prefer they/them pronouns but everything is cool
- I have a plethora of issues, mental and physical, but most notably I have dissociative identity disorder (DID), post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), functional neurological disorder (FND), and more I'm not super comfortable to share or am not diagnosed with (such as BPD, but I've been medically recognized, just uh... Dipped before any therapist could officially diagnose me. Three times :/)
- I'm disabled, I alternate between cane, crutches, and a wheelchair. Yes, I have chronic pain
- I am a childhood abuse survivor + csa (no, my parents aren't monsters, they're actually very amazing people and the abuse was outside the household) as well as a survivor of a three year long abusive relationship. This is likely a frequent subject
- I don't tag tw stuff much, it's exhausting and you should expect the worst on this blog, sorry
More rambley and unimportant info below cut ↓
I swear I'm not a violent or ill intentioned person, I just have intrusive thoughts that will drive me insane unless I talk through them and I've realized I'm sick of being nice and easy to step on. Venting here helps me work through my emotions and keeps me from lashing out. If you don't like my posts just ignore or block, they aren't for others consumption but it's nice when someone else understands.
And if you know me personally, fuck off. Not to be revisiting my emo teen years but you won't like what you see here. I can and will talk shit and it WILL feel personal. This is how I process things, if you can't handle it then hop along. Thanks ^-^
Sorry for the messy post, I'm writing this at 7am after being up for... Idk forever and I have a doctor's appointment and aaaa. But if you've bothered to read, I love you. This blog may be a deeply bleak perspective but I promise you that things can get better and if you're in a dark place then know: you WILL be okay. We both will be, we both are. This blog only reflects a small part of reality and there is so much more than this. If this blog is keeping you in a bad mental place PLEASE unfollow or block, I will always support and encourage growth, and even if you haven't done well today I am proud of you. Please take care xoxo
#on my hands and knees begging if you need a more positive blog my main isn't amazing but I post and reblog cute or comforting shit#my asks are always open there and just. please please PLEASE dont let my blog or others keep you in a dark mindset. let yourself grow#i know this side of the mental health community can be super toxic but ill always support progress seekers#just because you may not be as “bad off” as me doesn't mean you aren't valid. you hurt too. everyone hurts differently#i just aaaa im full of care right now please take care of yourself. someone out there loves you and that someone is ME. No refunds
0 notes