yourlakebed

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Queensland Alice: Madness Returns (2011) dev. Spicy Horse

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The Art of Alice: Madness Returns

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ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

·.༄࿔ ·.༄࿔ ·.༄࿔ ·.༄࿔ ·.༄࿔ ·.༄࿔ ·.༄࿔ ·.༄࿔ ·.༄࿔

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the heart palace from the game alice madness returns

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Vale of Tears Alice: Madness Returns (2011) dev. Spicy Horse

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yoshiki: hikaru is evil ..he kills people-

asako: WHO THE FUCK CAAAARESSS, BE GAY, DO CRIMES

yoshiki: bu-

asako: BE THE GAY KING

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Tanaka: this spirit is unfathomably ancient and evil. It will cause havoc all through the region unless we put a stop to it

The spirit, living as a gay teenage boy: okay so do you think my friend just likes me or do you think he like likes me?

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I think the most heartbreaking thing about the most recent chapter is this panel. Like 'Hikaru' was just afraid of this type of thing happening, but he was reassured by Yoshiki that he trusted he wouldn't do it again.

But then, here we are again, and even though 'Hikaru' is trying so hard again and again to resist his own nature and understand what it's like to be human, he hurt someone. He hurt someone really badly without meaning to, as much as he was working hard to improve, he was just doing something huge to save people! And yet theres an injured kid and a sobbing mother because of his actions

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I'm going to be physically ill

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are we ready for these panels to get animated.

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‘Hikaru’ is such a crybaby that yoshiki’s image of him to differentiate from ogikaru is him crying

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Wallowing in the scene of Yoshiki just sobbing his heart out in his bed the day after comfirming his best friend was dead. Trying to stay quiet to not alert his family. Mourning a boy he loved and never knowing if he could have been loved back. Hikaru died alone out there and Yoshiki never got to find him or hold him or say goodbye or give him a burial. Now something in Hikaru's body is walking around, openly loving him back, and Yoshiki is going to selfishly use that, but first he has to mourn. And only the audience and that something in Hikaru's body knows how Hikaru cried out for Yoshiki in the end.

It's instant depression I'm gonna go back for, but hell if I know why.

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in the light of Mokumokuren making multiple statements trying to clarify, i'm just gonna share the way i see it (which doesn't mean that's the way you have to see it):

Yoshiki is a gay young man, who had romantic and sexual feelings for og Hikaru (which may or may not have been reciprocated, my personal interpretation leans towards them being mutual but Hikaru being in denial because of his special circumstances (big previous rant about it here)

'Hikaru' is a case of aroace rep (classic trope of non-human creatures being on the aro ace spectrum). Judging by these excerpts i don’t personally see him in the sex repulsed side of the ace spectrum (he says that he enjoys tasty food even though he doesn’t need it and in the same way i can see him getting something pleasurable out of romantic/sexual interactions even if it wouldn’t be the same thing Yoshiki/an allosexual person would, which is something quite authentic to how a lot of irl acespec people feel about sex, enjoying the act itself even if sexual attraction isn’t really a factor)

I do think that the relationship between Yoshiki and ‘Hikaru’ is most likely to be a QPR (queer-platonic relationship, both because of ‘Hikaru’s’ feelings not exactly translating to sexual/romantic attraction and because of the way Yoshiki seems to be attached to him in a way that’s different from how he felt about OG Hikaru (not blushing at seeing him shirtless anymore etc), but i do also think that they could experiment with sexual/romantic aspects in a hypothetical future

two things are clear, both of our main characters are queer individuals (cause sexuality exists outside of relationships as well) and while they feel strongly about each other this is not a BL because the story is about them dealing with their fear of not having a place to belong and the coming of age experience of trying to find that place and living a happier life, as opposed to just being a straightforward story about them falling in love

i also think that as well as representing core aspects of the aro and ace spectrum experience the “not falling in love/not being able to fall in love” represents the way a lot of queer people (or even people who don’t feel ‘normal’ for other reasons such as chronic illness) feel when they aren’t experiencing “coming of age milestones” at the same pace as their peers

(in the same way as i think that Yoshiki’s initial feelings of disgust at ‘mixing’ turning into enjoyment represents both overcoming internalized homophobia as well as the more universal experience that teens of all sexualities might face where they aren’t fully comfortable with what is happening with their bodies during puberty

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I wanted your last memory to be a fun one. But since ya won't die… kill me instead.

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Also just for people who weren't at the panel, this is Mokumokuren's first manga series ever.

She was making art online and got scouted by a company, turned down making manga multiple times, finally decided to try to write a story and make it, and that is how The Summer Hikaru Died was made.

She said later on she wants to potentially do a fantasy story which I'm sure will be sick, but I feel like she doesn't get enough recognition for the fact that this was her first ever series. Especially since she did not want to be a mangaka originally.

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It's been days and I can't stop thinking about this page, I need someone to come and sedate me. Even though he and Yoshiki have spent so much time trying to figure out what he is, ruling things out and drawing conclusions, in the end he still calls himself a monster despite it not being true and I can't help think it's because that's either what Yoshiki has called him so he's internalised that shit, or he's been sitting with so much self hatred towards his true nature that that's what he's just decided what he is and I don't know which is worse.

He's not human so can't be held to human standards, but even so he keeps "fucking up" and feels like he has to carry that burden alone. He's doing everything he possibly can to go against his very nature because he loves Yoshiki and wants nothing but to just be with him.

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