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Was excited to get a new follower till I checked the account and it was just porrrrnnnn. I'm sad. I don't want to seem ungrateful for the free porn but I've gotten used to the community and was excited to find out which fandom they were from. 🥲

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One of the weirdest thing about growing up suicidal is that you assume you have no future, you don’t even try to envision it because you see no point. So eventually, you start assuming everyone else sees nothing in your future either. Recently, my friend and I were talking and she said something about how at her wedding I could wear a suit or a dress as long as it matched her bridesmaid’s dresses because the butler of honor has to make a good impression. This hit me so hard because I had never realized before how other people thought about me. She said it so casually like it wasn’t even a hard decision, just a given fact. She loves me so much she saw me at her wedding, standing with her on one of the most important days of her life. And you know what? There are so many people who think about you that way. If that isn’t proof that you should keep going I don’t know what is.

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in my head when Charles figures out he is bisexual, he starts to get all flustered and cute around Edwin.

like Edwin will say "great job Charles" and he would stutter "thanks Lov... i mean mate. Mate"

but then Edwin starts getting confused because Charles will be all strange towards him and fears its because Charles is disgusted about Edwin embracing his sexuality but its actually the opposite (Charles cannot deal with how handsome Edwin looks all confident in himself and his desires).

cue dramatic confession when Edwin tells Charles they cannot be friends if Charles doesnt accept him for who he is, and Charles screaming "i want you so bad like i am in love with you"

and now i am sad cause i will never get to see cute bisexual Charles having a crisis because Edwin is so pretty and he cannot deal with it.

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she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would meet someone for 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

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 Best of BL 2021: Favourite Shows [1/3]

Lovely Writer (24 Feb 2021 - 12 May 2021)

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“breathe slowly”

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what happens then?

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EP12's big kiss... but from the behind the scenes (vid ver.)

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I thought you were asleep. Not yet. I can’t fall asleep. What about you? Aren’t you sleeping?

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There’s still another type of ending. What is it?LOVELY WRITER (2021)

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“let’s go into the water”

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I just watched lovely writer and loveeeeee Gene and Up Poompat. I'm obsessed k? So I looked up if he had anything new and saw this and the whole Up Poompat tag here on tumblr and I am dead. I died. I havent seen it yet but I will because I will support this pretty but I am dead. I'm arranging a watch party bec I cannot watch this alone!!! My soul will leave my body and float down the dirty river near my house and no one will fish it out to save it.

Give me another series with them right. Fucking. Now.

I NEED

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LNC: MING EDITION [insp.]

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Up Poompat