zentloper-xmas

[zentloper-xmas]

Greetings all,

I’m writing on Christmas Eve this year. For a few years now I’d been considering going “all digital” with my Christmas letter. This year I guess it’s finally happening because every time the thought passed my mind to sit down and write it, I always had at least two other “bigger” priorities breathing down my neck preventing me from doing so. Plus, have you SEEN the price of stationery and postage?? Oh, nevermind, you probably have…

The year has taken us many fun places, like up to Chicago, IL in April, Big Bend National Park in May, Oklahoma City, OK in July, the Waikoloa Resort in Hawai’i with the in-laws in August, and Nashville, TN in November (with a quick stop over at Dollywood in Knoxville– I’ve always wanted to go, and I came back with a fabulous pair of turquoise boots bedazzled with fringe!). Always thankful for the ability to travel, see new things, and have some adventures together with my hubbie!

I also find myself as Vice President of a local non-profit (it’s that LGBTQK+ org I mentioned in last year’s letter). Neil and I got very involved with volunteering, event planning/hosting, and community outreach, and the result was a nomination in the group’s elections in November. Neil got a slot too: Membership Coordinator! Being VP pairs well thus far with my titleholder responsibilities, which includes going to conventions for panels, running educational classes, making appearances at events to schmooze, and judging contests. One of my biggest successes this year was implementation of not one but TWO ten kilometer fun runs (one in the spring and one in the fall) that I hosted as fundraisers and to raise awareness/visibility for transgender folk. I’ll be continuing that in 2025. The work  all feels very rewarding, especially when folks who I don’t even personally know will come up to tell me that the authentic way I live my life inspires them to do the same. Wow. That’s awesome stuff, y’all.

Only somewhat tangentially, I don’t know if you’ve heard but there’s a lot of anti-trans legislature hitting the Texas Senate/House in 2025 (39 of them have been pre-filled, to be precise). There were 669 such bills across the US last year (thankfully only 48 of which passed– which is still too many, but we count our blessings where we can). The majority of these bills target education, healthcare, and legal recognition, and there’s been a massive spike since 2023. (If you’re looking for a helpful resource to stay informed, I suggest: https://translegislation.com/ ) I’ve watched with sadness as transphobia has been ramping up in our country for the past decade (for reference, I came out and began transitioning mid-2011, a relatively safe time and place [California] to do so), and this year on Transgender Day of Remembrance (a day to memorialize the lives of trans folk who were lost due to anti-trans violence celebrated annually on November 20th) the death toll was at 33+.

I hope you won’t mind if I get up on my soapbox a moment just to say none of this is okay. I’m not okay with this. I ache for my trans siblings, especially our trans youth. That number hit me hard this year, and I’ve been doing all I can to get involved, speak out, and educate those I can reach with my platforms.

If any of this is stirring concern about MY personal safety as a trans person, know that I’m statistically good. I’m white (statistically-speaking, POC are more targeted), I’m male (statistically-speaking, trans women are more targeted), and I pass* so well that the average person I meet out on the street has zero clue I’m not cis (until I tell them that is, because I’m very open about working it into conversations in a form of what I like to call “every day advocacy”). Neil and I also created a “go bag” of necessary supplies and have an emergency action plan in place in the event something really bad were to occur in Texas and we needed to leave IMMEDIATELY for my safety. Kinda shitty we feel a need to have these preparations in place, but such is the world we currently live in. It’s not a matter of fear, but realism: A lot of folks out there would rather I was dead.

*btw “pass” or “passing”  is an outdated term, though still the most common parlance you’re likely to hear; a better term is “cis-presenting” rather than “cis-passing”.

Turning back to lighter matters… the Buda Library claims that I’ve saved $1,185.43 by renting rather than buying. I’ve been devouring every book they put on the shelf that relates to transgenderism, gender identity, gender-creative parenting, with a sprinkling of challenges facing women too. (I’m glad the resources are there for everyone to read– go Buda! <3) I just find all this subject matter so fascinating… and often encouraging as society progresses gradually toward a kinder, more accepting world. I hope you won’t mind if I drop a bunch of book recs like I did last time. Partake if you will (I hope you will!):

“Raising Kids Beyond the Binary: Celebrating God's Transgender and Gender-Diverse Children” by Jamie Bruesehoff

“Men Who Hate Women: The Truth About Extreme Misogyny and How It Affects Us All” by Laura Bates

“He/She/They: How We Talk About Gender and Why It Matters” by Schuyler Bailar

Oh, and I got a new tattoo! It’s a balloon doggie with spots like a dalmatian! Xyr* name is Speckle. <3

*Xyr is a “neopronoun” used in place of their, his, or her; I’ve been experimenting with the use of xe/xem/xyr on non-gendered entities like plushies to get more used to using alternative pronouns.

Have a wonderful holiday and a splendid 2025 ahead,

Rick & Neil

[zentloper-xmas]

Season’s Greetings! I’m writing to you in a frantic state because right now it feels like I have 17 million things on my to-do list and, like the Lernaean Hydra, every time I knock one off it, two more appear in its place! @0@

I guess that begs the question: What have we been up to this past year? Well, besides a beach trip to Corpus Christi, Ren Faire in Bastrop, hike in Dripping Springs, backpacking trip to Lost Maples, enjoying time with my brother’s family and Neil’s parents over Easter, marching on the Capitol for Trans rights, Furry convention in Houston, kayaking the river in Austin, video game convention in Austin, another beach trip to Galveston, seeing the botanical gardens in San Antonio, a visit to Knott’s Scary Farm in Anaheim (CA), another camping trip in Cameron, running our spooky garage walkthrough for Halloween, another Furry convention in San Antonio during the solar eclipse, visiting Neil’s sister and her newborn in Black Hawk (CO), another Ren Faire in Houston, and loads and loads of karaoke/dancing.

The lattermost of those is informed by the fact that we found ourselves a nice little social group based in the Austin/Central Texas area that hosts numerous fun get-togethers several times a month. In fact, the kayaking you see on the enclosed photo was one of said events! It’s an LGBTQ+ group, and I don’t think we’ve ever felt quite as “at home” in Texas as we find ourselves now. Amazing what a sense of belonging will do for a person! And for a couple. In a lot of ways, the events feel like “date nights,” especially when we dress up for the occasion. We’ve become a lot closer emotionally as a result, which has been simply wonderful. <3

Another wonderful thing Neil and I have been doing is book clubbing! We’ve been reading books on various topics that interest us a chapter at a time, taking notes and convening in the evenings to discuss and share our thoughts. We’re both pretty intellectually curious individuals, and it’s additionally illuminating to explore one anothers’ viewpoints and perspectives on the topics. In particular we’ve found our noses in a lot of LGBTQ+ and adjacent books. (I hope you won’t mind if I recommend a couple at the end of this letter!)

I’ve been getting big into advocacy this year. I’m a founding member of the DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) Group at my work, and monthly I contribute an article to the Employee Newsletter. If you haven’t gotten enough of my prattling on with this letter, feel free to give them a read:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/rick-zentler-529005147/recent-activity/articles/ Mostly they highlight important LGBTQ+ holidays and their importance to the community, to help raise awareness about marginalized and/or misunderstood groups.

I’ve gotten to get up on stage and give speeches at a couple LGBTQ+ pageants, which are judged also on an interview, costuming, and a performance (guess which of those is my fave, haha). In November I was selected as the winner! How cool is that? I’m hoping to do a lot more educational talks/panels/workshops in 2024 now that I’m an official Titleholder for Central Texas. It’s exciting to not only share my passion with others, but to be recognized for my efforts.

When we last left our intrepid heroes, they were attempting to line up surrogacy. We jointly agreed to press the pause button on that, as Neil decided to “return to school” to get his degree– quotes there because it’s all virtual and paid for by his employer! Definite win! It’s a bit of a juggling act for him to be working full-time and schooling part-time though, plus our new social commitments and time dedicated to one another… adding a newborn on top of that did not seem like the wisest plan. We’ll reassess in a couple years’ time once his degree is complete. The hope is that it will open some doors for him professionally, since well, babies are expensive (especially when you have to “rent a uterus,” LOL).

I think that just about wraps up what’s been going on on our end. Now to get wrapping presents!

We hope this year has brought you as much joy as it has us!

Rick & Neil

Book Recs:

Ace: What Asexuality Reveals about Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen

Delusions of Gender: How Our Minds, Society, and Neurosexism Create Difference by Cordelia Fine

[zentloper-xmas]

Zentloper Xmas Letter 2022

Lo and behold– it’s a Christmas letter! Stunning! Magical! Magnificent!

Well, I hope that’s how you feel opening this. 😂 Before I write these things, I scroll through my photos and make a list (and check it twice *wink*) of what’s happened. It felt like very little had happened this year, until I did that scroll. Turns out, plenty’s happened! So lemme share some highlights...

Neil and I both got promoted! 🎉 Neil ocially became a Data Analyst in April of this year. He’s still at Amazon, and does a lot of audit-related stu at the warehouse to ensure accuracy and junk using various code. Maybe one day if we’re really lucky, they (or another company) will recognize his value and pay him appropriately, cuz right now he’s still making peanuts. 🥜 As for me, SEMI had an opening that was a 20% pay bump and more reliable hours, still WFH, so who could say no? I’ll admit, it’s not the kind of exciting job I prefer... like operating roller coasters🎢 or dancing up on stage, but I’m smart enough to recognize a good thing when I see it: a flexible, reliable gig like this will be really beneficial when we eventually have a newborn around. 🍼

We’ve gone all sorts of places this year, as my wanderlust is never quite satiated. In January (to get me, and the Prius Neil’s folks gifted us, back from Cali), Neil flew over and we road-tripped back to our Texas home, spending a couple nights at the Grand Canyon’s cabins. The snowfall was gorgeous! We also hit Roswell, NM to see some aliens 👽 and a unique “immersive art experience” known as MeowWolf.

Neil’s sister Martha had her thirtieth birthday in May, 🎂 and the whole fam planned ahead of time to convene in Denver, CO where she and her husband, Chase, live in order to celebrate the occasion. I particularly enjoyed dining at the fancy restaurant Chase worked at, Guard and Grace– known to be one of the best steakhouses in the world! In July I joined my parents in Las Vegas to attend FreedomFest, a gathering of so-called Libertarians (calling them “so-called” because many of them were not actually very good at practicing Libertarian principles... 🗽) for many thought provoking panels and discussions. In August I took my Etsy shop “on the road” for a Sonic fan convention in Dallas, where I sold lots of stickers and buttons and the like– I think I recouped the expense of the trip... maybe! 😜 Then in September we had a pleasant camping trip in north Houston as well as a Ren Faire in Bastrop.

Think I’m done? Not quite! Last month we drove through Lousianna, Alabama, and Mississippi to get to Florida (upping the # of states I’ve visited to 23) for Neil’s maternal grandmother’s service. While she passed mid-Feb 2020 and was cremated, her interment was planned out far in advance so all her children and their spouses could attend; Neil and I were also able to make time in our schedules to go. I’m glad we did. We were graciously given a room to stay at his Uncle Adam & Aunt Rox’s home, and they were fabulous about showing us around some of the sights FL had to oer (even in the midst of Hurricane Nicole), like gators 🐊 and the beach. I’m determined to take them up on their oer to come back to see Busch Gardens next time!

We sure get around for being complete homebodies, ha. As for the house in Buda, we now own a partial stake. After my brother and his family moved out and into their own place down in Schertz, my folks and us drafted up a FSBO in order to “go halfsies” on the place. Finally, some sweet sweet equity! In order to pull o this stunt, Neil and I legally tied the knot at the courthouse on June 3rd. 💍 Neato. We are still planning to do a ceremony with friends and family at some point. We’ll keep y’all posted!

I continue to flex my creative muscles, be it whipping up some new seasonal place settings for our dining table, decorating the garage for a spooky Trick-or-Treat walkthrough 🎃 for the neighbor kids, or taking on painting projects to spruce up the joint (next up: baby room!). Also this summer I ended up reading quite a few memoirs by transgendered individuals 🏳️‍⚧️ as research for something I’ve always wanted to do: write an autobiography. I’ve spent a lot of time flipping through all the journals I’ve kept over the years (on my 40th), scrounging through my keepsake boxes, sorting photographs (digital and film), and bugging relatives for info. I’ve got 66,000 words down so far and a lot more words to go. I never was one for brevity.

I’d been hoping to announce some surrogacy news in this letter (have I dropped enough hints in this letter?), but unfortunately there have been delays. When Roe v. Wade got overturned in the summer, it caused a fair amount of panic nationally. A lot of appointments got scheduled in the reproductive health space, so we’ve been trying to be patient as things progress. That said, there has been progress: We’ve selected an agency to represent us, set up an escrow, and our potential surrogate is in the process of medical screening. Best case, it’s possible we could have a young one joining us late in 2023, but I don’t want to make promises when so many of the factors are out of our control. Can I take this moment to say, man, heteronormative couples have it easy... Just *boink* and baby!

In this increasingly digital world, I’ve decided to catalogue these Christmas letters 🎄online. So if you’d like to see letters from years past without digging them out of the shoebox you assuredly keep under your bed like me, or if you weren’t on our mailing list yet when I began in 2017, you can by going to the following blog:

https://zentloper-xmas.tumblr.com/

You may even see some bonus photos there for this year!

Lots of love, y’all, and Merry Christmas!

Rick & Neil

[zentloper-xmas]

Zentloper Xmas Letter 2021

Greetings from Texas!

Well, sort of? Presently I’m back in sunshiney California, as I took on a seasonal gig at my old theme park, Great America. Auditioned for a role as an “Atmospheric Character” with the Midway Merriment team and got selected to play Mr. Twister. So I’ve been prancing about handing out candy canes to children, as well as doing quite a bit of dancing. It’s a delight when you’re paid to have fun! I’ll head back to Texas once the winter holidays end.

For the regular “season” (April to September) I worked closer to home, at a waterpark called Schlitterbahn (owned by the same company). Began as a Lifeguard but was quickly promoted up to Dispatch Supervisor, which ultimately wasn’t quite as much fun as I’d’ve liked it to be. Contemplating whether or not I’ll be returning for 2022.

Once the waterpark closed however, I was given the opportunity to work the month of October at another Cedar Fair property: Valleyfair! It’s located in Minnesota, near the twin cities (Minneapolis & St. Paul). They were oering free travel, accommodations, and meals, so it was a no-brainer. I had a splendid “workcation,” using my o days to explore all the area had to oer: hike the many trails and enjoy the parks, visit the zoo, aquarium, and arboretum, attend a hockey game, shop at Mall of America- all while taking tons of pictures, of course. Experiencing autumn that far north was so fascinating... the inclination of the sun cast this almost other-worldly glow over the landscape, along with the changing leaves on the trees... it was gorgeous!

I continue to work remotely for SEMI helping with projects here and there. I also finally started an Etsy shop where I sell stickers, pins, and prints of my art (mostly favorite fandoms like Sonic the Hedgehog and Star Trek). I’ve made well over five hundred sales since it opened in January, so I think I can safely say it’s been fairly successful! It would be cool if it continued to grow; the extra income is certainly nice. If you’d like, you can check it out here: https://www.etsy.com/shop/sumofzed

You can bet 2021’s taxes are gonna be a blast. :P #adulting

Neil meanwhile is working at Amazon and continues to involve himself in a variety of coding projects at work, and studying AI/ML at home when time allows. Still hoping he breaks into the tech industry sometime soon. You’d think with all these big companies building factories out in the Austin area, there would be more jobs!

Achieving work-life balance is a struggle, but we managed to do some fun trips during the year now that COVID has abated. In March we camped at Enchanted Rock and enjoyed the numerous trails there. In June my parents and I went to Knott’s Berry Farm for the park’s 100th anniversary celebration, as well as explored Tombstone, AZ. In July my brother and I went to a cool retro gaming convention. Also in July Neil and I took a road trip up through Arkansas, Tennessee, and Kentucky up to Ohio, where we explored two theme parks I’d always wanted to visit: King’s Island and Cedar Point (the latter of which was celebrating their 150th anniversary!). Of course, as an employee I get plenty of perks (like free admission and discounts), so that cut down on our costs. Though I bought quite a few souvenirs. It was an awesome time and I can’t wait to go back. Spent Thanksgiving with my in-laws, who were gracious hosts.

Along the way I’ve continued to post lots of Yelp reviews, and I’ve been nominated for their Elite crew for the fourth year running. Neat! Can you tell I like to stay busy? Being idle has never been my thing.

The biggest news is probably that in early November Neil and I combined our genetic material. I’d gotten my eggs frozen at UCSF some six years ago, but we finally took a big step towards becoming dads: we have seven embryos now ready and waiting for a surrogate. Mind, the cost of surrogacy is immense, and I balk at how we are going to manage to aord having all the children I want to have, but with determination, one day at a time, I hope we get there. I keep reminding myself I’ve come a long way in the past ten years since I came out as trans- even when things felt impossible I was able to overcome them. I relentlessly chase what I desire. It’s just a shame it’s been such a challenge navigating the IVF space as an LGBT+ couple.

Beyond that, though, we are thankful for our health and overall good situation, as well as a loving, supportive family. We hope for the same blessings in your lives.

Merry Christmas!

-Rick & Neil

[zentloper-xmas]

Merry Christmas, y’all!

How do you write a Christmas letter for a year like this year? I won’t lie to you, it hasn’t been a fun year for the most part. But thanks to my family and a move, it hasn’t been a total bust either.

The biggest news is the house in Austin, TX. Well, Buda to be specific, which is a “smaller” berg south of Austin– bigger in quotes because it’s definitely growing, where growing = refuge for the mass exodus of Californians. We’ve been greeted, sassed, and everywhere in between from native Texan folk as a result. Nah, for the most part, everyone’s extremely friendly, especially those on our street who have welcomed us to the neighborhood.

The move happened in August. The touring and paperwork happened in July. In an… interesting turn of events, my parents decided “fuck it” and bought a home for the purpose of being a “landing pad” for myself and my partner, Neil, as well as my brother, Riordan, and his wife, Shawna. So technically, we’re renting. But the hassle of a cross-country move is over, and hell was that a hassle. I’d never done a long-distance move before, let alone across multiple states. And being the collector I am, I had A LOT of boxes. But it’s been really fun getting to unpack all those boxes and decorate an entire home!

At any rate, I’m endlessly thankful to be in the position we are now. And to my folks’ charity, who saw fit to use their stable financial position to give us all an opportunity. Previously we’d been occupying Neil’s parents’ secondary domicile. Once we moved out, they were able to put their home up on the market and sold quickly!– even during a pandemic, the Bay Area remains a hot housing market, for whatever reason… considering most tech companies are largely remote now.

Something that should have been big news but felt like a big fizzle was my graduation. I finished my Master’s program in May of this year (then SJSU proceeded to take forever to send out our degrees… how does it take FIVE months to mail a piece of paper??). I was halfway through my remaining class when COVID-19 struck, such that we muddled the remaining eight weeks out remotely before calling it good. Of course this meant no graduation ceremony or in-person acknowledgement of my accomplishment of any kind. No photos. No cap and gown. No balloons. Wasn’t even able to get together with my 2017 cohort for a send-us-off. Well, my parents did get me a cake after they saw how melancholic I was. I still just feel jipped.

So does my mom on that front, considering she’s a lecturer “at” UC Merced (notice those quotes again!). She misses the in-person classes and student interaction that made the job fulfilling. She actually had me film, edit, and upload all her lectures on YouTube so her students can learn remotely. So now she just attends office hours and meetings through Zoom. She and my dad were here in Texas for about a month, and it was actually easier for her because the internet connection was better here than Patterson, CA. LOL. Dad’s actually, factually, fully retired… for realsies this time! All the remote work was reason enough for him to finally pull that trigger. Now he struggles to figure out what to do with his free time– kidding, he just hits those home projects 100% harder now, ha.

Actually BIG news is my sister-in-law’s pregnancy! I’m gonna be an uncle… and really soon! She’s due early January. So 2021 is going to be very different with a baby in the house. Probably a good thing– I need some practice for my own eventual kiddos. We are all SO EXCITED to be welcoming a new addition to the Zentler brood, as it were.

Foolishly, though I knew it not at the time, I chose this year to set a goal to run 2020 miles this year. I got to complete a half marathon in January as well as another in February, but the one scheduled for March sadly got the axe. Thankfully our new hometown sponsored a small 5K “turkey trot” event over Thanksgiving. As of typing this, I’m a mere 100 miles from completion! So that’s a personal success.

I miss working at the theme park. I was all set up to be an Entertainment Supervisor for costumed characters going into the 2020 season. Thus far with all the stringent regulations California has in place, few entertainment venues have been able to do business, Great America included. For now I remain partially employed (contract work) with SEMI– a global industry association for semiconductors– mostly involved with website content management and marketing endeavors. Neil and Riordan are both employed with overnight graveyard gigs to help pay the bills.

Fun is still allowed in Texas, to the extent that safety isn’t compromised. The fam has been able to attend fun outdoor events like a corn maze/pumpkin patch, renaissance fair, tattoo expo, traveling carnival, and plenty of new tasty restaurants. To get in the spooky spirit in October, we even set-up our own haunted house walkthrough experience in the garage and handed out frozen popsicles to the kiddos– there were a lot of trick-or-treaters! We also have fun at home; the family enjoys playing board games and video games together most nights, and trying out new recipes in the kitchen. Here’s one of our favorites so far for Cranberry Orange Shortbread Cookies!: https://www.recipegirl.com/cranberry-orange-shortbread-cookies/

We hope all is well with you and yours (as much as possible), and that 2021 treats ALL OF US a whole lot better,

-Rick & Neil

[zentloper-xmas]

Greetings all,

The big 2020 is almost upon us! Funny... it feels like only yesterday Mum was filling the bathtub in preparation for Y2K... :o

Let’s recap a rather busy year! In February I resumed working at Great America. Spent some time ushering for shows, then got cast in the Big Easy Sound production over summer, supervised the Cornstalkers haunted corn maze over the “spooky” part of the season, and now I’m supervising a team of “elves” that decorate cookies and do crafts with guests. It’s been a fun season, and there have been a lot of exciting improvements to the park recently!

I also took on a 10-week executive internship with Target over summer, and participated in a marketing competition to recruit students to attend a SEMI conference, which I then won and was then offered contract employment to help with another project at a higher pay rate– hard to say no to that. So I’ve been with them since, chipping in on projects working from home; they’re a trade association for global semiconductor companies. Never an industry I thought I’d work in. I blame working 3 jobs simultaneously on my inability to say no to job offers...

Neil is still with Schwan’s home food service, but he fills his downtime attending classes and meet-ups for various coding languages, practicing and reading and practicing some more...! Eventually he’d like to shift his career into something with a data science application, and he’s making great strides mastering the languages. He even placed third in a recent online competition! [/bragging]

All the hard work is due to pay off. We’ve been like dragons hoarding gold in our lair, saving as much as we can for a down payment on a house; our eyes are on the Austin, TX region. Us and my parents took a 12-day trip there in May. We got in Mom’s new li’l red Fusion (yes, she upgraded to a newer model and gave the previous Fusion to my brother) and broke it in by driving it allllllll the way from Bay Area Cali to Austin non-stop! We took turns at the wheel and eventually got there some 30 hours later. Spent a lot of time checking out nearby state parks and amenities, activities and restaurants and groceries, toured the university, researched places where we might work, and purposefully spent time in traffic on highways to get a feel for exactly what it would be like to live there. We also toured a few housing developments / master planned communities, and I could envision our future raising kiddos there. <3

I’m of course hoping to convince my parents and my brother and his wife to move to the region as well, so we can all be together. The closer the better. I’ve always been big on family gatherings, especially around holidays. I was really glad my brother was able to join us for our Wente camping trip in September and that my aunt Elaine visited for Thanksgiving. Our timeline for moving is sometime in Summer/Fall 2020, after I graduate. I’m pretty excited to have a Masters under my black belt. ;)

Neil and I manage to find snippets of time together for dates, and as a result of my obsessive online reviewing of wherever we go, I actually made it to Elite Yelp reviewer status, so that’s been fun. Neil quit vaping (before the media went crazy even) and has been nicotine-free since March! I’ve gotten back into running and it’s my plan to sign up and complete a half marathon early in 2020.

Reckon that’s about it. We hope everyone is looking forward to 2020 as much as we are!

Rick & Neil

P.S. Neil and I were recently featured on NBC News online. Check out our article:

https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/transgender-men-eager-have-biological-kids-are-fr eezing-their-eggs-n975331

[zentloper-xmas]

Merry Christmas, all!

It’s time for another year’s wrap-up. Already? Already! Let’s start with old news and work forward. Technically, I proposed to Neil November of last year in 2017, but we were on a camping trip in the woods (Pinnacles National Park) all alone in the wilderness, so word has gotten out more or less gradually. Folks keep asking us “When’s the wedding?”; I’ll let you know when we know, haha. Our finances are pretty tied up in future plans, and the wedding is one of them.

To that end, the two of us were quite agreeable to temporarily moving into Neil’s folks’ place in Santa Clara in early May of this year. They recently acquired their new retirement home up in Rohnert Park in anticipation of eventual retirement, and thus have been staying partially there and partially here, and while they’re away we take care of the place. We both really appreciate the lower cost of living and the room to spread out a little. (Julie jokes I own more stuff than they do... and maybe she’s right; I’ve always been a pack rat. Thanks, Dad.)

David and Julie also recently celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary in September with a delightful frolic (they’re big into the Contra dance scene in the Bay), which also gave us the chance to visit with his sister and brother-in-law, Martha and Chase, who came for the occasion. Matt and Val (Neil’s uncle and aunt) visited us for a Thanksgiving banquet with his grandmother Jane, and Ruth (Neil’s other aunt) shortly thereafter for Hanukkah. We also had a nostalgic trip to Wente Scout Reservation with my parents over Labor Day Weekend, enjoying kayaking, sailing, and even stand-up paddle boarding on the lake. So it’s been a good year for seeing family, which is always nice. Another memorable event that allowed us all to gather was my brother’s wedding to his fiancée Shawna in June, at a gorgeous garden venue in San Andreas. Since then they’ve moved up north to Washington state, where some of the rest of my extended family resides. The distance makes me miss them, but technology (texts, apps, and social media) at least keeps us “close.” =)

Speaking of, I convinced Neil to finally get a iPhone. His old one wasn’t cutting it on the job; since he assumed “Acting Manager” at his Schwan’s depot, he’s been handling a lot more calls and general communications among staff. It’s a lot to handle, but I know he’s doing a stellar job and I’m super proud of him. With any luck they’ll give him the promotion he deserves! Meanwhile my ex, Mike, managed to score himself a gig at none other than the mighty Facebook! Wow! He and I like to keep in touch and hang out from time to time, including attending D&D games with our pals. I recently changed jobs myself, I’m now a Student Assistant at the Global Leadership Advancement Center at SJSU. Just part-time administrative/clerical work for while I’m still in grad school. We’re in the midst of finals right now (and I can’t wait to put Finance behind me, lemme tell you!), but then I’ll officially be halfway through the program. I’m set to graduate May 2020.

I’ve also still been indulging my creative side. In April I took a weekend-long pinstriping course— you know, those nifty multi- colored intertwining lines you see on classic cars and hot rods? I bought a lot of brushes and paint to continue practicing at home (you should see the old family van), and I even attended a convention where I got to sell some knick-knacks I’d “striped.” And in November I took a class on Mosaics. If you want to check out some of my work, you can visit this URL: https:// bayareapinstriper.tumblr.com

Sorry, not sorry, for the shameless plug. LOL. Hope everyone is well this holiday season!

-Rick and Neil

[zentloper-xmas]

Christmas 2017

Hello all from the “Zentloper” abode,

I’ve always wanted to do an annual Christmas letter. It was a tradition in my family growing up; Dad would round up all our input about what significant events that had happened over the year to include and then he’d type it up and we’d all gather around the table putting our signatures on the cards as we readied them for the mail. In my first marriage, I didn’t have too many friends and family to differentiate myself from the old “Zentler Xmas Letter” and could not justify partaking. But things have changed considerably, choices made, lives rehashed, and this year I find myself in the circumstance where it makes sense to gather a list of people to whom extending a seasonal greeting seems appropriate. Congrats, you made the list. ;)

So where to begin? 2017 has been a rather blessed year for Neil and I, most things considered. We still reside in our little studio apartment on the second floor of a complex in the middle of San Jose, but that may be changing next year. Ultimately, we both want a house somewhat secluded from the grid while remaining in Silicon Valley, but there’s a lot of saving left to do to make that dream a reality. Somehow, I’m confident, we’ll make it work. Until then, our heads are filled with daydreams of home ownership and little do-it- yourself projects– I guess that’s fairly normal for two people embarking on life together.

Of course, it would also be preferable if said domicile had a multi-car garage... Our “fleet” as Neil calls it, has expanded from two vehicles to four over the course of this calendar year. His most recent acquisition– a 1983 Chevrolet Camaro Z28– has been a source of entertaining joy-rides and mechanical (mis)adventures, with the promise of “many more to come.” Early this year, back in February, he also purchased a new motorcycle; namely, a 2017 Indian Springfield, and his old bike, a 2013 Yahama V-Star became my baby. I’ve had my fun decking it out, adding a windshield, repainting the saddlebags, giving it a tank bib, and more. But more importantly, the purchase enabled us to take many wonderful weekend rides together, exploring destinations throughout California: taking in the gorgeous views, reveling in the sensation of freedom as we glide down the road through twists and turns, and enjoying one another’s company. We hit up lots of National Parks and beaches or just cruised unfamiliar stretches of pavement for the heck of it. On our way to Reno in June, we unexpectedly hit snow– very glad we avoided frostbite on our toes. Our year’s capstone ride was Las Vegas in August, crossing the desert in the scorching summer heat. I decided to assemble a quilt of California such that we could document our journeys with patches and pins from each location.

We do wish we had more free time to take advantage of together. Neil has been working with Schwan’s Home Food Service for almost a year now, which has a good salary and benefits but incredibly long hours. Of course Neil, overachiever that he is, has excelled in the role; he’s the second highest Sales Rep in the region or something like that, which is most of the West coast. I’m immeasurably proud of him.

Meanwhile, I’ve been on the path of pursuing my Masters in Business Administration at San Jose State University. Having graduated back in 2010, I was a little nervous about returning to school, but I studied hard and took the GRE sometime in March and got excellent marks and was thus conditionally accepted, pending some required courses, which I completed online. I began my coursework in September and have already learned so much. I find that my brain is much more suited to comprehension and application of concepts than it was when I was an undergrad. Too weird. But then, my background in English and Visual

Arts and profession in the theme park industry has certainly made me stand out from the rest of the business crowd, and it’s fun being a little unique.

I also underwent what should be my last SRS procedure: a hysterectomy in September. Neil took time off work to care for me while I recovered, which was swift; in three weeks I was back to 100%. Transitioning has been more than a six-year process at this point, but I can safely say I’ve never felt more comfortable than I am now, both physically in this body, and emotionally. Neil’s unwavering acknowledgement of and participation in my gender identity, and his love for me for who I am, is truly something I never thought I’d have in a partner.

I hope this message reaches all of you at a happy point in your lives as well. We think of you and the ways you’ve touched our lives often, even if we don’t express it.

Best Wishes, Rick and Neil