zeoneo

[zeoneo]

to celebrate getting over her:

allow me a day to grieve, even just this last one

let me chew before i swallow or spit

let me savor the feeling before i go back to feeling monotone

we got all the time in the world, a short moment wouldn't hurt

i was patient, so you should be with me too

it was a pretty long time ago

it was rough but i was inlove

i should not be dwelling on you anymore

but i saw photographs, our memories

and i recognize the stars in our eyes

now i can't help tears falling from mine

when will i ever be exhausted enough to forget

would it ever be acceptable to hang out with friends at the same time?

be at the same place without acting like the other isn't existing?

did you take the stars with you when we decided to walk different paths?

it seemed to be only lit when i used to look at you

♤♡◇♧

stop doing that

you know I'll drop everything and everyone for you

and i wouldn't even hold anything against you

maybe just my hand against your cheek as i caress it

as if i haven't been hurt before

like i didn't spend my time trying to look for a better version of you in someone else

♤♡◇♧

for a moment

just for a brief one

i had the chance to hold your hand

again after what felt like a lifetime

and my heart skipped a beat

all the other hands i ever touched felt all too foreign now

no matter how long they stayed warming mine

seems like some things are reserved just for you

even the way i call you love

like a title only i should get to use

too sacred to forsake

all yours and no one elses

—your scent lingers long after you stopped being mine

♤♡◇♧

it's a cycle, a damned one like sisyphus

how i try to feel like i got over you so i let others in

they treat me so well and for a time i feel content and loved

just not inlove, it's so weird why do i feel like i feel nothing

the touches feels so natural but they don't feel like yours

and i'm disappointed in myself as i realized that i'm doomed

again, as usual, per always

but i don't mind hurting as long as it is you

really, i don't mind at all

i'll try to mend and bend till i rust

maybe i'll get lucky someday and break my self

enough to cripple me to not come running back to you

♤♡◇♧

i just wanted to see you

maybe hold you for a bit longer than last time

and with intent, some sober courage

but why does fate always put barriers

why is it trying so hard to keep us apart

can it not see my persistence?

i just want you

please...

will it ever honor my desperations?

♤♡◇♧

i hate how i've grown to understand you

actually understand and not just tolerate

i'm burdened with guilt from feeling things that are valid

i now know that it isn't you that i'm mad with

just mad about the circumstances just one time please

give me a chance to be with you

why am i still not over you

after everything

after everyone

♤♡◇♧

i get it now

it's not me that you miss

but my constant lingering presence

close enough to yearn but distanced to not feel overwhelmed

you miss the buzz of reaching out to touch but hesitating halfway

and the silent eye contacts that holds unspoken confessions

i don't learn my lessons

everytime, i step out of the fantasy zone

bursting your bubbles by my desperation you let me go again

like an outgrown toy

can you please make it clear next time?

♤♡◇♧

tied up the loose ends

i can never be the girl before the new one

i was the new one before

i know how it must feel, even if i don't know her

i have respect for me and for her, even if the respect for you hangs by a thread

i hope you're good and i hope she's getting better

i wish for peace, mostly for me

for you? i wish you learn

♤♡◇♧

all the works are still about you

when i'm finally moving on, it's from you

even when they aren't, they still are

the works about her still have your absence

i don't know what to do

my brows are shaped into a frown and i no longer have stars in my eyes

even if there still are, you must've dimmed them on your way out

♤♡◇♧

i wished there were confrontations to satiate my rage

i wished you had reacted, do anything to justify your cause

i wished i didn't feel bad, i didn't have to

–i no longer wish for things for you now

in fact, i no longer feel anything

i'm free, finally

[zeoneo]

in sickness and in ...

you occupy my mind

though half the thoughts are how miserable you make me feel

and that makes me want to throw up.

i would've kept romanticizing the idea of what could be

but now the sick feeling weighs heavier than how much i'm missing you.

[zeoneo]

for a moment

just for a brief one

i had the chance to hold your hand

again after what felt like a lifetime

and my heart skipped a beat

all the other hands i ever touched feel all too foreign now

no matter how long they stayed warming mine

seems like some things are reserved just for you

even the way i call you love

a title only i get to use

too sacred to forsake

all yours and no one elses

—your scent lingers long after you stopped being mine

[zeoneo]

can't fathom the thought of her loving someone that isn't me. not even when it was before she knew me.

[zeoneo]

220618 JENO

© JamJar0423 : JaeJe_DJ : Antiviral0423

[zeoneo]

It's the waves of sadness when I'm greiving that makes me feel like drowning. How could we just miss people and not be able to tell them that we do?

[zeoneo]

The main reason why I think I'm not ready to be an adult is because quite frankly I do not care about my self.

[zeoneo]

If you want to love yourself, start from being selfish

[zeoneo]

i can't just describe myself with a song, I'm MARINA's whole discography.