zerohour-fic-blog

[zerohour-fic-blog]

what about all the shit you done to me?

this is long.  I hope you guys enjoy.

marlee.

“Bitch, we should go out!” My voice slit the air in half, overpowering the gentle sound of James Blake who had been crooning on repeat for an hour now.

My statement earned her eyes and then a smirk that let me know she wasn’t completely against the idea. I nearly smiled – easygoing Erin was my favorite.

“Go out where?” She gazed at the backwood in her grip before bringing it to her lips.

She wasn’t much of a drinker. Smoking was her thing. And she did a lot of it.

“I don’t know,” I shrugged and then cackled. “Let’s do 1OAK.”

“You need to stay your drunk ass here.” She murmured as a smirk bit at the corners of her lips.

“I’m not drunk.” I swore. “I only drank wine.”

She chuckled, smirking at me. “Yeah bitch, a whole fucking bottle!”

With a laugh, I glanced at the Petrus bottle on the table. It was my special occasion wine, as it was very expensive but at the moment there was nothing special about my life. It was the complete opposite.

“Let’s get pretty and gooo.” I pinched her bare thigh, disrupting my own rancid thoughts with my words.

“I’m only going out if we in VIP.” She took a pull of her weed. “I ain’t with that standing in heels all night shit.” She snapped on the exhale.

“Fuck I look like?’ I quickly responded, offended. “Of course we’ll get a table.”

“I’m just saying.” She murmured and then cackled at my peeved expression. “I ain’t realize you were a socialite and shit.”

I wanted to remind her that Larry lived in clubs but now wasn’t the time to bring him up. Erin would probably go on and on about how trash he was and then we’d argue because of my automatic will to defend my husband. He was problematic but he was my problem. Bad mouthing him in any capacity was unacceptable. It was grounds for me to go the fuck off.

“I mean, you know.” I smirked and then stood, leaving the topic there. “I need something to wear too.”

“You wanna drag me out to some raggedy ass club filled with a bunch of scammer niggas and you wanna stretch my shit out too?!”

“Fuck you mean, stretch your shit out?!” I frowned. “You callin me fat, Erin?”

She shrugged. “You sure as fuck don’t wear a size 2 like me.”

“Yo, you rude as fuck,” I snapped and she grinned. “Just find me some shit that stretches.” I muttered, standing and leading the way to her bedroom.

It took what seemed like forever for us to get dressed. Most of the time was spent arguing. Erin insisted that we just stop by my place so that I could grab one of my own dresses but I didn’t want to go there. It was cold and empty and a reminder that my life wasn’t playing out as planned – that my marriage was a joke.

I needed her to understand that without me having to explain it. I needed her to stop trying to oversimplify things, namely my life and feelings.

In the end, I won the argument though for a while it seemed as though I wouldn’t. Arguing with her was exhausting. Most times I wanted to tap out just for the sake of staving off a migraine.

After having me swear to God and put my word on everything else I loved Erin allowed me to squeeze into a chartreuse colored Herve Leger number she had. With it I wore the strappy Sergio Rossi heels I’d had on earlier.

“Shit, this bitch keeps riding up.” I complained, tugging at the containing material. “Next thing I know, my ass gon be out.”

“This line is too fucking long, Marlee.” Erin huffed, ignoring my complaints.

She didn’t care how uncomfortable the dress was. The only thing she cared about was me not spilling the cocktails I intended to drink on it.

“Okay…” I cut my eyes at her.

She muttered something under her breath and I knew straightaway that it wasn’t pleasant. Not wanting to argue with her, I bypassed the line and headed for the door.

“Deucy,” I smiled up at the bouncer.

His frown deepened at the sound of his name but as soon as his hardened gaze found mine he stopped scowling and smiled a smile that could brighten even the darkest soul.

“Marlee,” He cooed.

It was hard to believe that one of the toughest bouncers is the city was smiling and cooing my name when seconds prior he was threatening to dismember some unruly white kid whose privilege wasn’t strong enough to grant him entry.

“Hi, honeybear.” I cooed, embracing him.

His midsection was sturdy and wide, inhibiting me from wrapping my arms completely around him. He never seemed to mind or notice as he worked to squeeze the life out of me.

“Its been too long,” He spoke, releasing me from his hold.

As soon as I was free, I worked to position my dress for the night at the appropriate length. Knowing I’d be playing a game of tug-a-war with the designer hemline annoyed me but it was the small price I had to pay for not wanting to venture home.

“I know! You been good?” I quizzed, genuinely interested.

Our small talk was disrupted by disorder in the constantly growing line and with a promise to catch me later, Deuce let us in before tending to the conflict.

“Maybe you are a fucking socialite!” Erin yelled over the music once we were in the club.

“Maybe.” I grinned, leaving it there and heading towards the bar.

With my wine wearing off I wanted another drink or four in my system immediately. We’d opted into catching Uber over to avoid the fight over who was going to be the designated sober loser.

Erin watched silently as I handed off my card to get a table and bottle service going. I could nearly hear her questions but I ignored them as the scantily clad waitress led us to VIP and the tufted booth that came with it. With a promise to return in a bit she left us to decide what we’d be poisoning our livers with.

“What you drinking?!”

Drake’s vocals filled the club, guaranteeing two things – that the people attempting to converse were yelling every word or that people were up dancing. No in between.

“Is your socialite status getting us a discount on this table? Is that why you’re handling everything?”

“I’m handling everything because I’m the one that invited you out. I want to have a good and comfortable time with my best friend.” I smiled, needing her to leave the topic alone.

But leaving shit alone was impossible for her. “I’m just saying, you knew Bubba at the door then we have this great table in VIP–“

“You ladies ready?” The waitress returned and I knew straightaway that some angel was watching over me and didn’t want to have me barking on Erin.

“Yes!” I chirped despite the fact that I hadn’t even looked at the menu. “The Code – two of em and a bottle of Armand de Brignac.” The waitress’ eyes immediately lit up as I rattled off the name of the pricey champagne.

“Perfect. Be back.”

“The fuck is the code?!”

I laughed at the expense of my friend. She wasn’t much of a drinker. “It’s Pineapple juice, D'usse and Disaronno… It’s like an amaretto sour.”

“Sounds good.”

“It really is. It’s some shit that sneaks up on you too.” I grinned. “ A couple of them and you’re good.

With an enthusiastic nod, she grinded in her seat leading to my laughter.

Our drinks came, Drake transitioned into Rihanna and Rihanna transitioned into Migos. The energy in the club was great. People seemed to be buzzing with joy – or maybe it was just me buzzing because I’d been drinking for hours now.

I’d noticed my liquor intake had increased substantially in the past few months. Of course it didn’t feel like I had a problem but it was certainly something that I noticed. I didn’t do any hard liquor, just wine, but my normal 2-3 bottles a week had turned into 5-6.

Smoking was a hobby I’d picked up on but then quickly dropped after Larry found me passed out and then rushed me to the hospital. After being placed on suicide watch the herbal drug seemed less appealing though the alcohol and anti-depressants mixture was mostly to blame.

“Bitch, we need to be over there with those niggas!” Erin’s voice exploded in my ear as she nodded towards a nearby group in VIP. “All those gold bottles and shit.” She observed. “You know they got money.” The conclusion came with a tap on my thigh.

“We got our own money. We good.” My response forced her to kiss her teeth.

“I thought you came out to have fun!” She whined.

“I did!” I gestured around. “This is fun – there’s good music, I’m here with my bitch, I got my drinks… I look amazing. Fun.”

“Sitting here half dancing to music is a dub.” She waved me off.

“Well, get up and dance, E.” She smirked at my challenge.

“You the one that – oh shit sis, he looking over here!”

“Who?” I quizzed disinterested.

I looked good – I expected men to look. I only became annoyed when they approached me with their nonsense.

My wedding ring never left my hand, making my tolerance for men and their faux ignorance slim to none. The ones that approached me were always super flagrant or the ‘yo man don’t let you have friends’ type.

“The fine nigga from that table.” Erin’s excitement didn’t quell my disinterest. “He staring hard as shit.”

Other men didn’t interest me – point blank.  I couldn’t afford to entertain them. I only desired one man. Dealing with others for the sake of boredom or lack of male energy would do nothing but put a wedge between Larry and I. The damage from Pierre and I was still very much prevalent.

“I ain’t thinking about none of that.” I took a sip of my champagne as I peered around the popular night spot.

It was crowded as usual. In between the wooden ceiling and chevron floors was a slew of energized bodies. The warm lights created a gold glow throughout the place that added to the vibrant energy.

The chill vibe here brought thousands out, most who weren’t fortunate enough to be granted access. Celebrities flocked here more than any club in Manhattan. The last time I was here I’d spotted Rihanna and the time before that Mayweather. It was a wonder people want access to the luxe but chill night spot.

“He thinking about ya stank ass. And he coming over here!!!” Her gleeful declaration was a boot of annoyance to my gut. “Bitch!” She slapped my thigh.

“Erin!” I warned, willing her to stop everything she was doing at once.

“Ladies,” The voice was like navy silk over the blaring trap music.

“Hello,” Erin greeted sweetly. “Whats ya name?” She didn’t waste a second with her advance.

I felt his gaze even as I gave my attention to the glossy, black bar and those who approached it. I watched those who desperately waved the bartenders down and rolled my eyes as I caught sight of a few guys annoyingly hovering over uninterested women.

“My name is Jarell. Yours?” I heard him speak but didn’t bother to look.

“I’m Erin.” She cooed, sweetening her voice that was usually hard and aggressive.

Erin’s annoying introduction prompted me to roll my eyes. Her sudden burst of energy around this man irked me. She’d been a drab, complaining ass bitch since we’d arrived but now that we were faced with a person with a dick she wanted to show out.

Typical.

“And yours?” The smooth voice called out as the rim of my champagne flute met my lips.

My glare flickered upwards, clinging to a pair of round brown eyes that read as innocent. His gaze narrowed at the contact and he watched patiently as I took my premeditated sip of my drink.

“My what?”

“You name?” His clarification was partnered with a pinch from Erin.

“My name is Marlee.” I announced, not caring to dilute the boredom in my tone.

“Cool.” He nodded and then smiled. It was a great smile compromised of white teeth and lush lips. “You Jamaican?”

“Nope but she is.” I quickly diverted the attention back to Erin, not caring to have it on myself.

The sound of her kissing her teeth was music to my ears. She hated talking about her West Indian background and after years of friendship I still didn’t quite understand why.

“Really? Where in Jamaica?”

“Kingston.” She was lying but I wouldn’t dare call her out on it.

“That’s cool. I just spent some time down in Saint Catherine.” I nearly laughed, as that’s where she was really from.

“Why you go there?!” Her disgust was evident.

Not caring to hear his answer, I glanced away from the two. My eyes roamed over the expanse of the club as the lyrics of the Gucci Mane song the DJ selected fell from my lips.

“Can I buy you ladies another bottle?”

Her ass was probably doing an internal bankhead bounce, I thought as he pretty much confirmed that he did indeed have money. He was offering to buy a whole $400 bottle of champagne as compared to simply dropping $30 for a new round of drinks.

“We’re fine.”

“Yeah,”

Our answers were simultaneous and complete opposites to my dismay.

“You sure can, Jarell.” Erin reiterated, cutting her eyes at me, daring me to say anything.

I took the dare with my chest out. “Jarell, we appreciate it but we’re fine, really. We haven’t even finished this bottle.” I gestured to the gold bottle on our table and offered him a small smile.

“Well Miss Marlee, can I at least have a dance?”

My smile dropped marginally. “Later?”

“I'mma hold you to that.” He smiled, bid Erin a goodbye and went back to his group of rowdy friends.

“Bitch!”

“You don’t even drink like that, E!” I laughed.

“So what! It was free liquor.”

“No, there was definitely a fucking cost. His ass would have bothered us the whole fucking night had he dropped money for that bottle.”

“You need somebody to bother your uptight ass.” She concluded, partially giving me her back.

Not caring about her attitude I peppered kisses on her cheek before standing. “Let’s dance.”

“Nah,” She refused even as she caved under my pulling of her arm.

We danced until the songs became wack and our feet became achy. The plush seats swaddled us as Erin told cruel jokes about ill-dressed party-goers. Our laughter was loud and our hands were adorned by liquor-filled cups.

I was more than shocked when Erin demanded we have another round of cocktails plus shots. The waitress quickly gathered up the order, knowing drunkenness led to more spending. With the liquor came a spike of energy and yet again we were up dancing to the latest in music. I was first to burn out and sat while Erin continued to go at the music.

“He fine as shit!” Erin dramatically declared, falling against me as she sat.

Having been already seated and laughing at a twerking Erin, I shifted to accommodate her frame. The liquor had certainly spiked her energy and for a while it’d had the same effect on me. However, my racing thoughts and growing anxiety was the culprit for the chill I’d found. To my fortune Erin was too loaded to notice that I was no longer on ten with her.

“Who?”

“That nigga with the Yeezys.”

Annoyed with her description my eyes instantly moved to the floor as I searched for the person she was speaking up. When I spotted the expensive sneaker my gaze began to trek up his frame for confirmation of Erin’s claim.

“He look Puerto Rican – what you think?” She pressed, leaning closer to me. “Maybe Dominican.” She added when I failed to respond.

“Dominican.” I muttered, knowing that to be a fact.

The guy she was speaking of was one I knew, and couldn’t stand. He’d never done anything to me besides be nice but my envy made it difficult for me to acknowledge that factor. My envy was rooted in that fact that he saw my husband more than me.

The guy Erin was eye-fucking was Mike, Roy’s brother – Larry’s good friend.

“We would have some bomb ass kids!” I wanted to acknowledge her outlandish remark but I was too busy searching for the body that I knew was present.

VIP had suddenly gotten louder and more crowded. The energy had shifted. The air was denser, making it harder to breathe. Or maybe I’d just drank too much and was being ridiculous.

“You stupid.” I managed to distractedly reply to my best friend who was clueless as to what I was going through.

She replied with more foolishness only I couldn’t quite make it out. Distracted was an understatement. I was completely brainsick at this point. My vision was tunneled and searching for what I loved most.

As soon as my eyes landed on him a heat consumed my entire body. My skin began to tingle and my heart began to pound. The skimpy dress I wore felt even more constricting, making breathing a struggle.

I shifted and rubbed my neck, never once allowing my eyes to fall off of him.

A million emotions raced through my mind. My head acted as the Autobahn, hosting a plethora of feelings and giving them free reign to be as fast and reckless as they wanted.

Glee was in first place and arousal trailed closely behind it. Longing was catching up to both and not one to be outdone shame was close behind.

I was here based solely off of my emotions. And I wanted to leave because of them too.

My need to see him overruled my pride and my common sense. I wanted to be embarrassed but there was no space for that emotion as my body was far too occupied by longing and angst.

For the most part I’d been living my life as a single woman while my husband did whatever he did. Our calls were minimal, our physical contact was nearly nonexistent and to be frank, I missed him.

I missed everything about him – the light sound of his voice and the way it dropped deeper when he spoke his native tongue, his imperfect smile, his perfectly firm yet perfectly gentle touch, his scent that was exclusive to only him. Everything. But more than I missed those things that were tangible to my senses, I missed our moments. I missed us.

It was when the bright flash of blue moved out of the corner of my eye that I finally took my eyes off of my estranged husband. The cobalt unitard that Erin wore grew further and further away with each second that passed.

With a sigh and a final glance at an unknowing Larry I shuffled after her, easily finding that she was in route to the ladies room.

The neutral toned, earthy décor extended to the bathroom. The space was warm and inviting – it was homey yet refined. Mirrors lined the walls, rich woods acted as accents and the black and white stoned floor prevalent in the rest of the club was also present.

In the room of black, white and rich browns stood a vivid blue figure that was bound to turn red from anger.

“Erin,” I called her name through a sigh.

Nothing could prepare me for the war of words we were about to have. No matter how gentle I went in, how soft my voice was, how nonthreatening my approach was Erin would still bark.

And she did.

“You dragged me out cause you knew this bum ass nigga was gonna be here!” Her explosion of words lacked a question mark at the end because she knew.

My lips pressed into a line, inhibiting words from flowing outward – not that I had any. Frankly, I didn’t know what to say. She was right, I’d wanted to come here to this particular club because I knew my husband would be here.

Desperate?

Maybe.

She kissed her teeth. “That’s fucked up, Marlee.”

“I apologize.” I attempted to take the easy way out.

“Bitch, please.” But she quickly rerouted me. “You ain’t sorry.”

“I don’t want you to be upset with me.” I muttered, watching her through the mirror. “We were having such a good time.”

Her frown was deep, twisting her pretty features into a gnarly visual. Her black rimmed eyes were narrowed and locked on me. Her red lips were twisted, symbolizing her utter distaste.

“I just—” I sighed brushing my ring clad left hand over the cool gold toned counter. “I miss him. I wanted to see him.”

“For fucking what?!” She exploded, causing the thin Latina next to me to jump and then make her way towards the exit.

“What are you yelling for?” I quizzed calmly, quietly.

With copious amounts of a alcohol pumping through our systems I knew getting into it Erin wasn’t the smartest option. I needed her to watch her tone.

“Cause you out here being dumb as fuck for this nigga who don’t give a shit about you!” Disgust laced her tongue, tainting the air of the bathroom.

I blinked and chewed my inner cheek and counted backwards.

4,3,2….

“Erin, regardless of what you feel, that’s my husband and if I wanna miss him then I will. If I want to be dumb – for him then I will.”

She chuckled at my expense. Her laughing at me was meant to inject my spine with humiliation. She wanted me to feel foolish because she thought I was. She wanted to belittle me.

“A ring permits you to behave like some desperate idiot?” Her words stung. “To chase after a man who clearly doesn’t want ya ass anymore?”

Another girl approached the sink, applying her berry hued lipstick. I watched her, wishing I felt the ease she was currently exuding. Her movements were fluid and graceful. She was at peace and it showed. Meanwhile, I was about ready to pop my bitch of a best friend in the mouth.

“I never pushed my problems on you. I never pushed my marital woes on you. I never pushed Larry on you. Yet, you’re standing here judging me and acting as though I have to ask for your permission to feel anything that I feel for my man. He’s my husband and if I wanna be desperate for him or dumb for him then I will. I understand you being tight about me bringing you here but don’t use that as a platform to air out how you truly feel about me.”

My eyes left the burning ones of Erin, finding the vivid lipped girl again. Her movements were no longer fluid but stiff and robotic.

The realization that Erin’s nasty energy had worked to screw up hers annoyed me. When she caught my gaze she quickly tucked her gold tube of lipstick away and excited that bathroom.

Without another word to Erin I did the same, bidding her a silent ‘fuck you’.

The trek from the bathroom back to VIP took no time as determination fueled my stride. I spotted him straightaway and without another thought I marched up to him, tapping his shoulder.

Curiosity and then recognition clouded his eyes as he looked at me. And when I failed to speak he took my silence as a cue and allowed his eyes to roam my scantily clad frame.

“I owe you a dance.” I smirked when his eyes were finally on mine.

“I thought I was gonna have to come back and beg you.” He smirked, leading me away from the booth he and his friends had been occupying.

“You don’t seem like the type of man who begs.”

“For you I woulda made an exception.” I flushed and then cursed myself for taking the corny rebuttal seriously.

I spun around, giving him my back as the bass heavy song filtered through the club. His hands instantly moved to my hips as I grinded against him.

Tilting my head back, I quickly took in my surroundings creating a countdown in my head. I knew without a doubt that this two person party would be over before the song ended.

Questions that included too much lip were whispered in my ear. My eyes slipped closed as I mouthed the words to the popular Beyoncé song.

The feel of Jarell’s hand moving down to my thigh was enough to make me falter. The feel of a pulsing heat looming over me was enough to make me freeze.

It was when the body behind me disappeared that I opened my eyes, finding a furious Larry inches away from me. I nearly laughed – it was as though he had a radar or some shit. I briefly wondered what the hell Larry had said to my dance partner to make him disappear so fast but in the end decided that I didn’t care.

The fitted cap he wore over his twisted hair was low on his face, creating a shadow that tugged at my arousal. The black garments he wore fitted him perfectly and beckoned thoughts of me peeling them away to the forefront of my mind. He looked amazing.

I stared at him, not caring that he hadn’t called me since landing in New York. Or that I’d found out that he was even in New York via his best friend’s social media account. I’d missed him, and I was happy to see him.

That’s all that mattered.

“Why you here?” He pressed rudely, distorting my previous thoughts.

“Its a free country.” I smirked, keeping my cool.

I could play games with Larry all day. I was great at this. Acting unaffected was my part time job though I could easily admit that my ability to seamlessly do so had fanned the fire that destroyed our marriage.

“You like this guy?” He jumped to the root of his irritation.

“I don’t know,” I shrugged gleefully, noting his pinched expression. “What do you think?”

The vein along his neck nearly popped as he scowled at me – eyes narrowed, nostrils flared, jaw tensed. His body wavered even as he stood stiffly. I nearly smiled.

“You cheat on your boyfriend, Pierre and go home with this guy?” His lips curled upwards, forming a mixture of a smirk and a snarl.

Typical Larry – saying nasty things to gain a reaction.

“Maybe.” I gave a typical Marlee answer – one that lacked all care.

With the speed and agility of a ninja he pulled me to him, snaking his arm around my midsection. His blunt fingertips dug into the soft space just under my rib cage as his glare narrowed in on me.

“Why you play with me?”

His warmth nearly melted me to a pile of goo. The popular Le Labo scent that wafted from his body was intoxicating in every way and I wanted nothing more than to drown myself in the essence of him. But in this moment he was feeling the complete opposite about me. He was pissed and jealous, and he looked like he wanted to choke the life out of me.

“You come here in this little dress and dance crazy. Who you wit?” The residual scent of cognac on his breath licked my upper lip as his face neared mine.

The thought of him pregaming with Roy annoyed the fuck out of me. Larry had never been much of a drinker. However, Roy had the ability to help morph the man I thought I knew so well into a drinker, a cheater, a heavy smoker – lord knows what else they got into.

At the thought of his crusty ass Dominican friend, I glanced in his direction, finding his peculiar gaze riveted on the two of us. The glare I threw at him was meant to devour his soul and feed it to demons. I couldn’t stand him and though he knew already, I wasn’t above reiterating it.

Larry grasped my chin, forcing my eyes back onto him before I could gauge Roy’s reaction. “Who you wit?”

“Jarell.” I rattled off the guys name, not interested in mentioning that I’d truly came with Erin.

His crushing grip moved from my waist to my hand and without another word he yanked me behind him as he created a one man stampede through VIP.

“Yo!” The familiar voice was enough to make me crane my neck. My resistance was enough to force a furious Larry to turn.

He paused when he found Roy rushing up to us with curiosity in his eyes and a million questions on the tip of his tongue. Disgust curdled in my stomach as he grew closer. Revolted, I took in his stringy hair and beady eyes. The BBP top that covered his upper half annoyed me because Larry had the same one and it was my favorite thing of his to wear – not anymore, I thought.

“I leave.” Larry spoke before he could.

“Bruh, we just got here and–“

Larry shook his head, cutting him off. “This important.”

His statement was a shocker. For months now I’d felt anything but important when it came to my husband. Everything else he involved himself in was important. His work, his family, his friends, his Luzy… I’d grown accustomed to being an afterthought for him – the forgotten piece of his life.

My grip on his hand tightened even as I said nothing. I had nothing to say. His words didn’t deserve an applause – me being important shouldn’t’ve even been something he had to explain. The fact that Roy even deemed it appropriate to question his leaving – with me – spoke volumes about where Larry had positioned me in his life in recent months.

“Aight, Bro.” Roy shrugged before looking at me. “Sup, Mar.”

I cringed hearing the nickname no one gave him permission to give me. “Eat a dick, Roy.” His snickers followed me as Larry pulled me towards the exit.

The ride home was dead silent. In fact the sound of Larry’s voice came only when he rattled our address off to the taxi driver and then thanked him before exiting. When we made it to the building we’d been inhabiting for years, he pulled me along, muttering a cloudy greeting to Ted.

He’d released my hand only to allow me to exit the cab and when my feet were planted firmly on the ground he took it hostage again, leading me as though I was incapable.

Once in the elevator I snatched my hand away and moved to the opposite side of the small space. “Had I known you wouldn’t fucking talk I woulda stayed with Jarell.”

Larry was on me before I could even finish my sentence. “Stop play with me, Marlee!”

“Fuck you, nigga.” I shoved his chest, sending him back to the opposite side of the elevator. “You don’t get to come back around here telling me what the fuck to do. All I did was dance with the guy.”

“You let him touch you like that – you know what people say when they see that and know you my wife?!”

I hadn’t thought of the fact that Larry was well known by the people in the club, making me well known. I also hadn’t cared.

“Do you know I’m your wife?!” I roared, earning his silence.

The elevator came to a stop on our floor and the doors slid open. Neither of us made a move. Larry’s chest was heaving as his anger coursed through him and I was forcing myself not to cry.

“Comere,” He sighed as the doors crawled to a close.

Refusing to move, I stared at him. I searched for the man I’d grown to love more than any being on this earth. His physical was the same but everything else was different. I hated it.

“Come here, Marlee.” He called again.

“Larry, I’m not fu–“

“Please.” His voice cracked, quickly shifting the energy and within seconds I was in his arms.

He held me to him, threatening to pulverize my every bone. His hug was desperate and the sighs that left his mouth were of relief. It confused me. I should have been the one having the internal celebration, not him.

My heart throbbed when his lips pressed to mine. The feel of them was foreign and familiar all in the same go. I’d spent so much time reminiscing on his kisses – his everything – and now I was experiencing it without the help of my imagination. It was sublime

It took mere seconds for the kiss to grow desperate as we both worked to catch up on what we’d been missing for what seemed like decades.

His hands moved to my ass as he hoisted me up. As my legs wrapped desperately around him, I slammed my hand on the door open button. With blind finesse Larry moved out of the elevator and down the hall towards our apartment.

“Fuck,” He rasped, pinning me to the door as his lips roamed the flesh of my neck. “I missed you so much.”

His words grew legs and ran over my nerves, triggering things I hadn’t felt in ages. Sure I was aroused but that was no tough feat. I felt wanted and that was a sensation I’d been deprived of for far too long.

Desperation curdled in my belly as I gripped Larry’s cheeks, forcing his eyes on mine. They were hazy, blurred with lust. It took them what seemed like forever to focus but when they did, I spoke.

“Unlock the door.” My voice was a thin rasp. It reeked of need, tainting the hall and tarnishing the walls.

I heard the keys only he didn’t move. His lean body was pressed to mine, making my back one with the door. His warm D'usse laced breath danced over my face and his lengthy fingers melted into the globes of my ass.

“Larry,” I hissed, impatient. “Open the door. You can’t fuck me in the hall.”

A devious smirk fitted itself to his lips, challenging my statement. A dangerous mixture of fear and arousal curled in my gut, forcing me into action.

I snatched the keys from Larry and dislodged myself from his hold, not wanting to give him enough time to prove me wrong. I knew he would. The thought scared and excited me at the same time.

Reminding myself that Ted was probably viewing the cameras, I whirled around facing the door. The action prompted Larry to immediately dropped his hands to my hips. He gripped the stubborn flesh and grinded against my ample backside, showing his lack of concern with our settings.

My hands trembled as I wrestled with the keys, trying to find the one that would grant us access. To my dismay they all looked the same.

“Larry,” I huffed. “Which key?” I breathed, trying to ignore how good his hands felt on my bare thighs.

“Argent.” He murmured, moving my hair to the side to grant him access to my neck.

“They’re all fucking silver.” I cried out.

My helpless moans drifted down the hall as his tongue danced across my neck. I prayed the walls were thick enough, that the doors were sturdy enough to block my sounds of pleasure from the neighbors.

His teeth joined the party, securing my flesh in a searing hold. My heart dropped, producing a deadly throb between my thighs. My breathing hitched, sending me wheezing like an asthmatic. My body trembled, quivered and shook, loosening my grip on keys.

The clatter rumbled through the silent corridor like a marching band, bringing my attention back to our current surroundings – back to reality.

Without thought I reached for the keys, knowing we needed to get the hell out of this hall before someone came out and spotted us. However, my husband had other things on his mind like taking advantage of my folded position.

I gasped when he raised my dress so that it bunched around my waist and groaned when his knowing fingers met my needy flesh. Fire replaced the blood in my veins as he pushed the saturated seat of my panties to the side. His fingers reacquainted themselves with the part of me only he knew.

Up and down, up and down he stroked my slit, gathering my moisture in the whorls of his fingers. “You so wet.”

His voice was a rasp and I didn’t need to see his face to know that his eyes were low and his lip was imprisoned by his teeth.

“So wet.” He whispered, as my back arched, opening me up further to him.

“Someone will see us, baby.” I whimpered, slamming my eyes shut when the pad of his thumb met my clit. “Fuck.”

“They sleep.” He swore and with that he tugged at the delicate sheer panties, ending them.

“Ted,” His fingers invaded my honeyed canal, sending me reeling. “The cameras.” I moaned, grinding against his hand.

“They not face us.” His voice was strained with concentration as he worked to tear me apart.

His deliberately curled fingers thrusted into my heat over and over, threatening my sanity and stability. I was gone, and he knew it. At this point I would fuck him downstairs on the front desk for Ted, all the neighbors and who ever the fuck else was wondering around TriBeCa to see.

“Larry,” I cooed gripping the doorknob as the little bit of sense I had withered away.

“You like that?”

“Yesss.” I spread my legs wider despite the fact that I knew accommodating Larry in such a manner would only lead to trouble, and a lot more pleasure.

He hypnotized me with his fingers, circling my engorged clit over and over and over again. Pleasure was shooting through my veins and with the help of alcohol I was in shambles.

My moans were back to back, filling the hall but my ability to care was nonexistent. I was close. My orgasm was creeping up on me at a shocking rate. I blamed my excitement and lack of proper release in the past several months.

My knees buckled and spine curled as Larry’s fingers moved slower, dragging over thousands of desperate nerves. Frantically my hands searched for an anchor to balance me in the midst of this blissful storm.

In rapid french Larry prompted me to soak his hand, and I did. I drowned it, showing him just how backed up I was due to his neglect.

By some miracle no neighbors came out to investigate as I mewled like a cat in heat.

As I slumped against the door, exhausted, Larry retrieved his keys. He quickly worked the lock, granting us the access I so desperately wanted.

Larry wasted no time backing me into yet another wall as soon as we were enclosed in our place. His kisses were hot and desperate. His touch scathing. His anticipation fueled me bringing me back to peak arousal within seconds.

“Babe, be careful. This is Erin’s dress.” I breathed as he recklessly tugged at the banded fabric.

Larry was known for destroying my garments in the process of disrobing me. My tattered La Perla panties were a prime example. His aggressive ways did wonders for my libido while severely damaging my wardrobe in the process. It was a simple equation of give and take.

However, him fucking up my best friend’s dress was not an option. The mere thought of the hell she’d raise nearly drained my vitality. She was particular about her shit and she hated Larry…

He kissed his teeth, showing his distaste. In the moment I couldn’t tell if his frustrations were rooted in the fact that his Hulk-like ways wouldn’t fly tonight or the fact that I’d mentioned Erin.

His hand rested on my hips and his eyes rested on mine. I could spot the defiance. It stood nearly as proud as his arousal, and partnered with it was apathy.

Not willing to risk it, I took a step back. My sigh was inward as his hands fell away from me.

My stare locked on his as I gripped the hem of the dress, raising it until my bare bottom half was exposed.

“Stop play,” He warned, licking his lips and pivoting forward. And though he didn’t say it, I knew that if I didn’t shed this dress quickly he’d do it – his way.

Relief swarmed me as I shoved the dress over my hips, tossing it to the side. My husband swarmed me next.

His kisses were honeyed and his touch was blistering. I felt so many parts of him on me that I couldn’t focus on the sensations each appendage created. Sensory overload would be what the coroner would scribble on my death certificate. Larry would be the suspect and his tongue, teeth, lips and hands would be submitted to evidence as murder weapons.

“You know what I miss so much?”

“What?”

“How you taste.” Liquor and lust had effortlessly remixed his voice. I loved it.

Unable to formulate words, I hissed and then shivered. My knees quaked as he neared me and gave completely when his arms went around my waist.

He handled my weight without complaint as he pressed his lips to mine, drugging me with his need. His kisses were slow and sweet but between each curl of his lips and flick of his tongue was a promise to destroy.

His lips slipped from my mouth, trailing a hot path down my neck while his hand busied itself with the needy flesh between my thighs.

“You miss me?” His voice was strangled by my flesh but I still heard him – loud and clear. However, that didn’t stop me from pretending like I didn’t.

I wasn’t quite ready to be vulnerable. Given he already had me just how he wanted me, I wasn’t ready to start verbally spilling my truth. My womanhood was screaming 'I missed you’ loud and fucking clear. That was all he needed – for now.

The soft trail of his lips was disrupted by a stinging nip via his teeth. I hissed out only to moan when he repeated the same action, adding a pinch of my nipple to the equation.

“Now you can no hear me?” With my clit being stroked, my nipple being strummed and my neck being suckled I could barely think straight. Hearing was a luxury.

My reply was a mangled whimper that left my husband dissatisfied. His punishment doubled as my pleasure as he nipped my collarbone and pinched my nipple.

“Larry,” I gasped when he was on his knees before me.

His eyes met mine and a sure smirk that was designed to cripple me contoured his lips. I cradled his head, weaving fingers between twists that needed to be done over. His lips made a journey of the fleshy globe of my breast before finally abducting my nipple into his warn cavern of a mouth.

My knees wobbled and twitched as though I was trying to emulate one of Lau’s crazy dance moves. In reaction, Larry gripped my ass tighter as though his hold there would stop me from tittering over.

His hand dropped from my ass to my equally fleshy thigh and his lips fell away from my breasts only to land on my torso. I cringed inwardly as his lips feathered over my not-so-evident rib cage down to the area just above my belly button.

My heart-rate quickened as I thought about the tenants I’d housed, and how they hadn’t survived.

He peppered the sweetest most tender kisses over my belly. His plush lips traced the space that had once been stretched by our love. His tongue ran over flesh that had been treated by non-ablative laser to rid of evidence that I’d even been pregnant. His attention to the part of my body that brought the most shame was crippling me. It was too much. And just when I was sure he would bring me to tears, he gripped my thigh, placing it over his shoulder.

His mouth was covering my pussy before I could blink. His ability to take me from one extreme to another like that was an act of terror.

I gasped at the feel of his tongue parting through my flesh and groaned when the silky appendage reintroduced itself to my clit.

My every nerve bowed to him as warmth ballooned in my belly. The silken touch of his tongue felt like everything that I’d ever wanted and needed. It was the answer to my every prayer – the outcome of my every wish.

My head fell back as his tongue swept down, circling my opening. My body froze and gushed as my brain tried to take on the multiple sensations. I was bound to short-circuit.

We should have been taking it slow as it had been a while but here we were, inebriated and going full throttle. Well, Larry was – I was merely trying to maintain my balance and keep from showing all my cards.

When his tongue slithered its way up my syrupy passageway both my balance and pride were things of the past. A pleasure induced wail left my throat and my body folded like my bones didn’t exist.

As though he expected me to crash he carefully guided me to the ground, never allowing his mouth to loose contact with my sex. When my back pressed against the wood flooring we’d meticulously picked Larry threw my legs open, stretching and spreading me to his liking.

Card after card flipped over, revealing themselves as I spasmed, shook and squirmed against his mouth.

“You missed me?” He tried again, wearing my juices as an accessory.

A broken moan was my reply but it wasn’t the answer he wanted. He tilted my hips, angling my body so that he had access to all of me. My mouth fell open and eyes nearly crossed as I tried to make sense of why this felt so good.

My soul nearly left my frame when I gazed down, finding Larry’s eyes latched to my face. His gaze was dark – ravenous, his brows furrowed. Twists fell over his forehead, creating smoldering shadows over his eyes. Needing to touch any part of him, I reached an unsteady hand out, gripping his hair.

I watched him watch me fall apart as his lips latched and pulled me to the gates of heaven. There was a glint of appreciation in his eyes as he licked my common sense away. His eyes grew darker with every mangled whimper that left my lips. He was depleting me and I, fueling him.

“Lar–“ The remainder of his name was swallowed as his tongue began to slowly circle my clit.

As though choreographed, my every muscle tightened. An uncontainable heat lingered in the pit of my belly and my joints morphed into putty, rendering me immobile.

The ball of nerves that’d been bouncing around in my womb came to a sharp halt before exploding into a million bits.

“Please,” I wheezed as my body trembled under the pressure of my release.

Desperately I swallowed gulps of air, sure that I wouldn’t make it as aftershocks ruled my body. My being burned with a detrimental combination of relief and anticipation. I wanted to retreat and beg for more all in the same breath.

The shifting of my body loosely gripped my attention as I focused on calming my racing heart. I was in a state of bliss where everything was blurred and glazed over. Everything felt distant, except for the throb between my thighs.

The heat consuming me intensified. It grew hands and caressed me, lips and kissed me. It had a voice, a familiar one, that revealed just how much I’d been missed, how much I was loved and how much I was needed.

Fingers that gripped my thighs seconds prior were now between them, caressing, worshiping. My breathing deepened as I found myself on he brink of another orgasm.

With an inward sigh that evolved into a moan, I opened my eyes finding Larry’s face above mine. His lips that’d whispered saccharine statements where inches from mine and as though he detected my thoughts he leaned in, giving me the sweetest kiss my lips had ever known.

His fingers continued to work, bringing me to the brink yet again. His fingers were warm but they were no match for the heat brewing between my thighs. I opened my lips to warn him, to urge him to retreat but all I managed to do was sob his name as my body yet again teetered over the edge and out of my control.

Spasm after spasm ripped me apart as Larry gripped my hips, seemingly holding me together. In the distance I heard my pleas – they were thin and broken. Both he and the liquor I’d overindulged in had drained my vitality.

Larry’s body lingered over mine and before I had the chance to enjoy the weight and warmth of him, he was sliding into my heat like a hot knife through butter.

His name was jerked from my mouth due to a mixture of shock, pleasure and pain. I hadn’t even realized he’d striped himself of his clothes but I was glad he had.

The initial sting resonated as more than just a physical ache – it was emotional. I’d been without him for too long. My body was being forced to readjust to what it’d once known so well. He’d been away for eons.

He’d left me longing, craving and aching for him. The effects of his neglect was burrowed deeper than I could’ve ever imagined.

I tried to ignore it but my body refused to. It stretched, ripping stitches from unhealed wounds.

“Why you cry?” He paused, hovering over me. “I hurt you, my baby?”

“No. I— it’s been a while.” I managed, wiping at my face before pressing my palm to his cheek. “I’m okay.”

He peered down at me through narrowed eyes as I willed his concern away. He didn’t look convinced but when I tighten both my external and internal grip on him he took heed to my words.

Pleasure consumed his entire face, causing the smoke of smugness to cloud my lungs. His breaths were short and heavy. His lips were open forming a small 'o’ and his nostrils were flared. He was in his own personal heaven.

“You feel so good.” He managed, moving slightly to extract his length only to roll back into me with a spell-binding stroke.

Our moans intertwined as our gazes locked. We both possessed expressions of awe. Had it been that long that we were shocked at the feel of each other? Had we really been that deprived of pleasure?

His length nudged my center over and over, building pressure in my womb. The fit was snug and with it came a mild ache but the pleasure overruled everything.

Larry quickly turned the living room into a stage for our performance. He had me on the floor, the kitchen island and had even attempted the couch until I reminded him that the expensive piece of furniture was a no sex zone.

With my mind set on the bed that we hadn’t occupied as a couple in forever I guided him there. Only Larry was as hopeless for me as I was for him and came to a stop in the hall, several feet away from our bedroom door.

The cool wall met my back as Larry’s heat settled against my front. My hands pressed into his shoulders as his did the same to my ass – gripping, massaging, positioning.

His eyes bore into mine as his length met my weeping center and with a thrust forward we were connected. Larry hissed and I purred, digging desperate fingers into his striated arms.

My thighs clutched his hips in a warm embrace as he rolled into my core, driving me nuts. Everything about him felt so good. It was impossible.

How had I had this man so many times and still managed to be in awe?

“Tu aime ça?” (You like that) He quizzed, rearing back only to meet me with a heart churning stroke.

“Ummhmm,” I moaned as my hand moved up to his jawline, finding it strained and pulsing.

“Je vous ai manqué,” (I missed you)

His voice was crowded with pleasure. It was deeper, coarser – dark. It was enough to make my nipples harden and clit throb. And as I moaned out, I wondered if it was the nature of his voice or what he was saying that did it for me.

“Je vous ai manqué,” The repeated statement nearly made me weep.

Moving forward I pressed my lips to his neck, earning his pleasureful groan. His neck was one of his many spots and one of my favorite places to worship. My tongue followed suit and my name fell desperately from his lips.

His pleasure dizzied me. My own thirst to please him made me lightheaded. It had been too long since I’d been able to. I was not only thirsty but hungry – desperate.

Gripping his shoulders, I adjusted my weight quickly shifting control in our current position. My back moved away from the wall and my thighs hugged Larry tighter as I lifted, grinding on his length.

“Fuck,”

“Mmm.” I moaned in his ear, harboring his length between my needy flesh.

I was his personal sanctuary. I wanted him to make a home out of me and never leave. I wanted to be responsible for everything that made him smile – everything that made him whole.

“Tell me you love me.” I purred, riding him with purpose.

With my thighs burning and lungs quivering, I willed myself to slow down but the internal option do so wasn’t there. Instead I accepted the fact that I would expire while reminding my husband of exactly who he belonged to.

“I love you.” Came his gritted reply.

My hips worked faster. “You missed me?”

“You know I do.” His hands were frantically moving over whatever part of me he could reach as his face twisted in torturesome pleasure.

“You belong to me?” I moaned, unable to take my own ministrations.

“Fuck, Marlee.” His hands were at my ass, willing me to slow down. And I did but that didn’t stop the way I used my pelvic muscles to grip him, holding him hostage in decadence.

“Tell me.” I rotated my lower half, knowing my life depended on what he said next.

“I’m yours,” He hissed and his eyes crossed as I grinded. “Yours.”

The feel of his heat coating my insides took me over ten consecutive edges. I screamed and gushed and shook. And just when I thought stability was near Larry’s voice sounded.

“We not done.”

And we weren’t. By the time we made it to the bed Larry had found a powerful source of energy. It fueled him, urging him to mold my body to his liking, fucking me like only he knew how.

“You missed me?” He asked the question for the billionth time as he took my body from the back.

My breaths were short bursts, symbolizing my struggle. My arms quivered as I fought to hold my upper half up. My body was arched and melting into the mattress, adding strain to my every muscle.

I was tired but still I wanted more. I wanted it all.

“Answer!” His hand met the globe of my ass with a prickling slap.

“Yesss!” I finally gave in as my arms gave out, planting my face into the plush mattress.”I missed you so much.”

Silence filled the room and his body left mine. Too weak to move, I lay there, trying to catch every breath Larry had fucked out of me.

My hair that I’d spent way to much time curling now stuck to my neck and back in wet chunks. My makeup that I’d delicately painted on my face was now smeared all over my expensive duvet. Erin’s dress was somewhere in a ball that would make her want to choke me.

Larry had ripped me apart and left me open and I couldn’t’ve been happier.

The thought of him made me raise my head but the feel of his tongue moving up my pussy from the back made me drop it just as quick.

Curses and prayers left my lips as he dragged me closer to his face. I moaned and twisted under his oral assault. His tongue was an agile snake, writhing over my most sensitive spots. He knew exactly what I liked and did it to perfection. He deconstructed my pleasure and put it back together again.

Unable to deal with how good he was making me feel, I pistoned forward only for him to thirstily pull me right back to his waiting mouth.

“No run.” He warned upon slurping at my moist folds.

“Larry,” I whimpered as my stomach clenched.

My breathing grew erratic as his tongue teased my opening before pushing into the tight space.

“Oh god!” My back bowed, nearly folding in two.

Larry held me firmly against his face as I tried to crawl away from him. He was a sadist and he was out to end me.

“You taste so good.” He groaned, peppering kisses on the curve of my ass before licking my slit from top to bottom.

A sharp spasm of need coursed through my womb when his tongue met my clit. I was close – so close.

“I can’t get enough of you.” His whispered against my pussy.

“Please,” I begged as pleasure burned me alive.

Pressure continued to build in my womb as he bathed my clit with more attention than it could take. He stroked it, licked it, kissed it, sucked it into his sweet mouth. And with every second the needy bud begged for more and more attention.

Bliss echoed through my frame as I bucked back against his face. His tongue was both decadent and annoying. My every cell craved his mouth, every fiber praised his tongue.

My stomach ached as cramps of pleasure rippled through me only retreat under the guise of Larry’s tongue. He was teasing, bringing me to the point of nirvana only to withdraw and do it all over again. He was a maniac.

“Lar– ry,” I cried as he slid a lone finger past my folds and sucked my clit into his mouth.

“Fuuuckfuck fuck!” I wailed as the erotic embers that had been building in my womb detonated, sparking massive fire. My body shook as a tsunami of utter bliss heaved through my body. And when I couldn’t take anymore pleasure I passed out.

-

I felt like I was floating. My steps were lighter, my shoulders lacked all strain, my eyes were bright – optimistic. I felt great. For the first time in months I felt genuinely happy.

Larry was back.

It wasn’t the sex that sparked my sudden positive outlook on our marriage. It was the feeling – the energy. Nothing he could have said or done to me in the past few hours could have made me feel as good as his energy did.

I knew Larry – arguably better than myself. Majority of the time I felt him. We were in tune and always had been, until recently – the last year or so.

When we lost Laurent things changed, we didn’t feel as in tune. I felt the disconnect then, and I’m sure he felt it too.

When Luzy came into the picture, things went from bad to worse. Not only could I not connect with him but I couldn’t understand him – the things he said and did, the things he didn’t say and didn’t do. I felt like I didn’t know him, like I’d completely lost touch.

I had lost him.

But now he was back.

Just hours ago, I was sitting on Erin’s couch over-indulging in wine as thoughts of my failed marriage and tarnished relationship with my husband filled my brain. I was down and depressed and everything in between. I had no idea of what my future would look like, and that bothered me.

Now, in the wee hours of the morning, I was nearly skipping down the halls of the home I’d build with my husband, wearing nothing but the love he’d covered me in.

I chewed my lip, disrupting a smile as my mind went to how Larry and I spent the night. He’d somehow erased all the things I thought I knew about the pleasure he’d taught me. He took his time reacquainting himself with every part of me, going slow when I wanted him to go fast. He was thorough in his exploration and found delight in my pleasure. It had been too much.

In fact he was the reason I was up now. He’d depleted me of energy and now I needed to restore it. My bladder woke me up, my thoughts kept me up and my growling stomach forced me out of bed.

I hated the fact that I’d traded being tangled in my warm, expensive sheets and the lengthy limbs of my husband to pacing down the cool hall of my apartment. However, I knew I needed to eat. With nothing but liquor pooling in my belly I’d soon feel nausea creep up on me if I didn’t make any efforts to soak the poison up.

The fridge was mostly empty as I hadn’t exactly been home but I managed to find some provolone and cheddar cheese slices that I’d picked up from the deli a few days ago.

I placed both cheeses on the counter before going back for the mayo. From the cabinet, I grabbed ghee and some Texas toast that I’d bought at the same time that I bought the cheese.

A loud buzz cracked through the quiet air of the kitchen and I swiftly turned around, finding the source of the disruption to be Larry’s phone.

In my haze I’d neglected to turn on the light, as my knowledge of my kitchen and the refrigerator light had been great guides. The phone however illuminated, added a bright beam to the darkened kitchen as the alert came through.

With a quick glance I found an Instagram notification and quickly went back to forming the sandwich that would fill the void in my belly.

When my grilled cheese was constructed but not yet grilled I moved towards the cabinet for a skillet.  I shifted a few pots and pans, not finding what I needed. Sighing, I straightened my back and pulled the fridge open, hoping the light would be helpful – it wasn’t.

With a groan I paced towards the light switch only to stop when three consecutive buzzes came through Larry’s phone. And as I turned, eyeing the now illuminated device another came.

“The fuck?” I whispered, wondering why the hell his phone was so active at 5:30 in the morning.

I briefly wondered if it were someone, uncaring of the time difference, in Paris trying to reach out. That thought alone rerouted my steps and the fact that the phone buzzed yet again when I reached it prompted me to collect the sleek device from the counter.

With my sandwich and my lack of light forgotten, I eyed the lock screen finding several Instagram notifications.

“Why does he even have the notifications on?” I wondered as they continued to pour through.

Curious as to what was going on, I quickly keyed in my birthday, unlocking the device. Larry’s phone or it’s contents had never been of any interest to me but this was weird.

I could see if he’d just posted a picture or something but his phone has been inactive for the past few hours, as he was with me and his phone was here.

My eyes narrowed as the app loaded and I quickly went to his notifications. Majority was of him being tagged in things but that was the normal. My stomach growled and I kissed my teeth, ready to end my nosy ways and quell my hunger.

My finger swept over the home button only to pause and then lift when a new notification came in with my name attached.

@Ltladi3berlin: I can’t believe this! That bitch is a snake! I wonder if @itsmarleeheaux knows. @lestwinson shame on you!!!

My mouth fell open and I quickly clicked the photo corresponding with the tag. A series of iMessage screencaps consumed the screen, forcing me to narrow my eyes.

It took all over .2 seconds to figure out who the conversation was between. It took .4 for seconds to differentiate my husband’s broken English from the other messenger – Luzy.

My heart nearly pounded out of my chest as I clicked my way back to the mentions, finding a different screencap.

I chewed my lips viciously as the words carved into my flesh. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. This was a woman who Larry claimed was his good friend and she was regarding him like this – like she was his girlfriend, his mistress.

I went to another screencap. There was a ton of them. They’d had more conversations in these few thread photos than we’d had in months.

A baby, I thought unable to believe that he’d confided in her about my issues with carrying to term. He’d talked to her about our problems, my problems and she was using my shortcomings as a selling feature for herself.

“Chink,” I jumped at the light sound of his voice. I hadn’t heard him come in, then again it was hard to hear anything over the shattering of my heart.

With my face slack and lips tight I stared at him unable to believe that the man standing before me was the same one I’d fallen in love with years ago. This wasn’t the man I’d married and created a million blissful memories with. The man I was looking at right now was a stranger – a liar and a cheat. A monster. He wasn’t mine.

And I didn’t want him to be.

Unable to stomach looking in his lying face for a second longer I pressed the power button, putting the phone to sleep. The gesture successfully killed all light in the room, leaving the space in front of me seemingly black.

Despite the fact that I couldn’t see him, I could still see him. His quizzical eyes and crumpled nose. His mouth that formed and 'o’ and his barely there brows that rose to meet his hairline.

Moving forward I stopped just before him, pressing the phone into his warmth. The feel of his fingers moving over mine as he accepted the Apple device made me want to vomit.

“Get out.” I hissed, moving around him and exiting the kitchen.

He was hers now and I wished that bitch the worst of luck.

(present)

“You quiet,” Larry observed through a sigh.

“I’m fine.”

I wasn’t fine.

And he knew it.

“You not but – I’m ready whenever you ready for talk about it.”

We had talked about it, in Maldives. Larry had reluctantly told the tale of how ’his friend had betrayed him and posted things he’d told her’. Those things were about me – about us.

In Maldives I’d spared myself the details of those things. I hadn’t wanted to torture myself. What I didn’t know couldn’t hurt me – as bad.

To my dismay, my brain and faulty memory system had different plans. Torturing me with a vivid recollection of the moment Larry’s phone, enhanced with screen caps from Luzy, found itself in my grasp.

It hurt.

It hurt so bad to know that Larry had ran elsewhere to speak about me, and my shortcomings and his unhappiness. He’d ran to her and told her things he should’ve been telling me.

God, it hurt.

“I go get Millie from Roy’s. You come?”

“Nah,” I sighed, running a hand over my hair. “See you when you get back.”

-

what about the time you said you didn’t fuck her?

[zerohour-fic-blog]

chapter three

The base is a simple, but then again complex one. To the natural hybrid, it’s a home that's suitable. It’s habitual.

We’re located on the outskirts of the Catskills, south of Town of Olive, where the human mind never thinks to explore. Some are curious, but for the most part, we’re safe and things are kept quiet. Our area consists of mostly land and tiny bodies of water such as, lakes or rivers. The water supply for New York State is located towards the East so though our water resource is limited and lacking, we survive and we stay hidden. That’s our first priority—to stay clear of the human eye.

The origin of this place started with Ray Gueye. Everything started with him—his idea, his mind, his vision. Larry and I had slipped from the hands of the enemy and needed a place to reside. We were located in South New Orleans, at the time, stranded in the abyss of the human world with nothing, but the scorning sun and weak faith to accompany us. Through the grapevine, we heard of a festival that would supply us with nourishment. It was around the time of Mardi Gras. A festive weekend that took over Louisiana streets and humans’ hearts for the sake of forgetting troubled times for a short period of time. I found it senseless and just another excuse for lightened chaos, but Larry was drawn to the intense horns and fierce colors that surrounded the city.

I went for him and for the free snags of food, but we ran into something even more interesting. Within the festivities, a crowd was forming that promoted the opposite of our kind. They wore all black and held signs that were marked with dye as dark as blood. The words written iced my veins: Death to all ELIES. Larry was the first to notice the shouts coming from the distance, but I was the one that sensed the presence of our own.

“This way.” I pulled the fabric of his shirt, encouraging his feet to move in rhythm with mine. I could sense the fear rumbling in his stomach. The sensations made a frog surface my throat, but I wouldn’t let the both of us freeze up in a situation like this. I had to get us clear of their view. “Come on. Move it. They’ll catch us, Larry.” 

He looked at me with bleak eyes before blinking away the coming concern twisting his brow. Nodding, I waited for him to bob his head in return and then began to weave our way through the mass of people. 

I felt his hand reach for mine and I curled my fingers with his in a bone-crushing grip. My shoulders bumped against others in sharp bombards and I winced at the pain, but kept going. I hated that the sensational feel of fear made me sensitive. It made me feel weak. Advanced hybrids weren’t weak. We were too targeted to be–it was too costly.

I could hear the shouts of the anti-hybrid rioters coming from my left and I tried to blur them out. I tried to make myself numb, but nothing worked. I was beginning to panic and I could see my eyes dimming to a bleak black.

“No, not now.”

My fight was letting up because I was so weak. We hadn’t eaten since yesterday and our stomachs were literally living off of drops of spared water and our own natural fluids. My body was worn and the alien in me was beginning to feed off of the human portion out of starvation. I was slipping and I could feel every single cell withering away within me due to the high stimuli of the moment—my fear was making my malnourishment worse.

“Cera, hold on.” Larry called in a boisterous shout and that’s when I noticed my pace had weakened. He was no longer behind me and we were no longer sprinting. Larry was jogging and dragging, while I was weighing him down with my skipped steps and trips.

Suddenly, the sun’s ultraviolet rays intensified and my face and body felt the humidity it gave off. My forehead burst with beads of perspiration and its sweat glands began to scream their frustration. The black had fully taken over my vision causing me to fully shut my eyes and trust Larry’s abilities. 

“I-I’m blind, Lar.” I wearied behind him. “I’m blind. I can’t see anything, but black. I’m losing myself.”

“Stay with me Cera!” I heard him bark the command before my body was snatched around and suddenly the sun was no longer on my skin. My back was against the curves of a lap and my hair being caressed. “Cera!”

I heard his voice, but my senses were overpowering my ability to respond. I sensed something and it felt sweet against my skin. It nurtured the burning sensation of anxiety scorching my epidermis and I wanted more of it. My dry tongue fixated on the words that I wanted to say, but all I could get out was a slight, “Hybrid.”

I felt Larry’s hands against my cheeks and the soft brush of something on my lips. It was warm and coarse. His hair. Larry’s hair.

The last thing I felt was the warm drop of liquid against my cheek. Then, I heard the blurred sound of a voice other than Larry’s smooth one. I blacked out.

That was over 7 years ago.

I woke up in an all-white room with two pairs of eyes on me a couple of hours later. The pair I recognized were sickeningly concerned, but they weren’t blackened, which promised me relief.

 The other pair were unfamiliar, but tranquilizing.

“We almost lost you there.”

A threat.

The first thought I had of the man.

He was tall and muscular. He had dark skin and a brawny frame that left Larry and I at an ultimate disadvantage. We wouldn’t be able to fight off the man if we had to. He would demolish the both of us with a single punch to the stomach. 

I looked to Larry who had risen from his seat and was now standing over me. He looked tired—fatigued—but not alarmed. I raised a single brow his way before asking the question that was lingering on both of our minds—or more so mine to deliver and his to confirm and respond to. 

He answered promptly, “He’s a friend, Ce. Chill.” He smiled as if to confirm the statement, which rubbed me wrong. Larry wasn’t a person to trust someone so easily.

So quickly.

Quickly…

“How long have I been sleep?” I asked him. The hoarseness of my voice came from the dryness of my throat—it felt like sandpaper.

“Easy.” Larry whispered, soothingly pushing a hand through my hair.

I shook my head and tried to sit up. A pain shot through every part of my body causing me to collide back down on the pad I was leaning on. That's when I noticed the difference. The differences in my senses—they were lagging.

"Larry, I feel...different–"

“It’s been about a day or two.” The mystery man spoke the answer I was looking for. I shot a glare at his bleak eyes and Larry’s hand rested against my shoulder. He’d felt the hostility in my cold gaze.

“Détendez-vous, Cerafine. C’est bien. (Relax, Cerafine. It’s fine.)” Larry whispered, pushing his thumbs over the balls of my cheekbones and then caressing my mane again. I growled at the man as Larry’s hands guided me back to the sheeted surface of the thin cot. There weren't any springs under it, but a wheeled contraption usually found in medical facilities.

 We were in a hospital? No. We couldn't be. By this man's scent, I could tell he was a hybrid. It was the same sweet waft I caught at the riot. He had to have more brains than this—to take us to a human hospital would mean he'd given us up to the authorities.

“She’s a defensive one.” The man grinned and his protruding cheekbones followed the lead of the perk of his lips. “That’s good. It shows she has heart. I respect that in a hybrid since our species are lacking in it now-a-days.”

I huffed a heavy warning breath through my nose as he began to round the pad.

I could feel Larry’s hands freeze against me as the giant inched towards us with healthy strides. Both of our defenses were radiating off of one another’s adrenaline. Larry could feel my alertness, while I could feel his hesitance.

The man froze and looked between Larry and I with squinted eyes. He nodded towards Larry and then moved his attention to me again. My instinct told me to pounce on him or try to use some strategic mechanism of escape or defense, but I refrained.

Something told me not to and Larry’s resistance definitely had a great deal to do with it.

“Cerafine, you just had a near-death experience back there.” He said it so casually. “You sniffed me out real quick though. It was immensely impressive.”

Sniffed him out? Couldn’t all hybrids sense one another?

“I’m assuming your trigger deals with others, correct?” I watched as he gestured for Larry to push his hands through my hair again. He obeyed. I didn’t refuse. It calmed me. “Or other hybrids at least. You’re a hybrid that feeds off of others.”

“I feed off of no one.” I snarled. 

His brows shot up. “Words. I’ve got a response from her. This is good.” I watched him nod towards Larry who was watching the man intently himself. He was still tense. I could feel it. “Your friend tells me his trigger has to do with the people he cares for and nothing else. Correct?” He looked to Larry for confirmation.

Larry only glared at him.

“I’m hoping…that’s a yes.” He chuckled, wearily. "You two are so entwined. I can feel your connection from here. It's amazing."

“Who are you and why did you help us?” I questioned, pushing myself up against the worn pillow behind me. “Where are we?”

“You’re in my home, Cerafine.” He looked around the whiteout room before turning back to me. "Welcome.” 

I looked down at the scratched marble floors and the rippled curtains hanging from the metal bars above us. I hadn't noticed their condition before. I took in the small space of it and confirmed this was definitely a guaranteed hospital room, but not an average one a person would be admitted to. My eyes shot towards the door not too far from the cot I was laying on. My lips parted to release a needed breath when I met the metal texture of the appliance meant for entering and exiting—or maybe just entering.

I moved my hands along the cold metal below the bed and soon my fingers met the sharpness of something. I brushed my index against the object before moving my curled palm down the length of a long, keyed chain. I looked up to Larry who reached down and laid a circular cuff into my hand.

When my eyelids twitched, while mystery man began to speak again. “It’s a prison. This is the hospital portion of the confinement. The very bottom of the building.” I blinked up to his knowing eyes. “Bet you’re wondering what you’re doing here. Well, I can start off by telling you where you are exactly. Do you remember?” 

I looked to Larry. “We’re in New Orleans.” I whispered, hastily. "In South New Orleans."

He blinked at me before shooting a sharp glare at our company.

 “You were in New Orleans 48 hours ago.” Mystery man said, crossing his arms. “ Now, you’re in the North.”

“T-the North?”

“Yes. The Catskills.”

 My eyes widened. “The mountains?” I breathed. “How did we get here?”

“Just like any other human would.” He smirked. “Plane. Rented car.” He looked off to the ceiling. “Hybrid abilities.”

"You got through security?" I questioned, astonished.

"Connections." The man advised.

My eyes moved back to Larry’s neutral ones and I noticed them flicker into warmth when he looked at me. “He good people.” He stated, pushing his hand into my tresses again. I leaned into his touch as he massaged my temple with a thumb. “He save you. I almost lose you and he come.”

“What do you want in return?” I looked at the man’s placid pupils. “We don’t have much to give—”

“All I ask is your ear, your opinion, and your drive.” He crossed his arms. “You have room for ambition. I see it in you. I saw it as soon as I sensed you.”

I eyed his expression. It was trusting and almost platonic—something I hadn’t seen in a while.

“Why do I feel like this?” I asked. "I feel...I feel–"

"Like a human, almost?" He chimed in. "Your senses are regulated. Your brainpower is limited. Your frenzy is maintained at a less threatening rate. You're stabilized."

I squinted my eyes. "Stabilized? You mean you gave me their medicine?" I snarled, harshly.

"No." He rebutted, nonchalantly. "I gave you a serum that will help you survive. The humans created a medicine that terminates us. I modified it into something that regulates us. You see it lowers your capabilities so that you can exist in the human world without going insane. Your frenzies don't come intensely. It's lightened." He smirked at me before pointing a finger at Larry. "This one was about to frenzy the exact moment you passed out. I injected him with the stabilizer and he was fine within seconds. It's like a medicine that benefits us and spits in their faces."

I stayed quiet for a moment just taking his words in. Was this really possible? Could we use our enemy's tactics to our benefit without injuring ourselves in the process? Were hybrids really something other than the outcasts of the human world? Could we actually be a part of it? 

My eyes wavered over the man's gruff beard that connected to a filled in mustache. He couldn't be anymore older than his late 20s. The hard eyes staring back at me were warm within their pupils. It was such a contradicting combination. It puzzled me, but for once in a long time, I felt safe.

His age didn't match up with his aura. He seemed experienced and attained an elderly wisdom within his words. Maybe that was why Larry trusted him while I was gone.

"Why are you helping us?" I quizzed.

He nodded and began to walk towards the end of the pad. I watched him. I listened. "Hybrids have been feuding with humans for centuries. We've never taken a chance to breathe and think about our own." He shrugged. "Instead we kill our own. We feud ourselves. We make an ass of our kind and it only makes it easier for them to wipe us out."

"A hybrid is taught not to trust anyone for the sake of their safety."

"Who told you this?" He asked, defiantly. "Another hybrid or the humans that kill them?"

I remained silent. 

"Society is a hypnotizing structural system. They want you to believe that they're on your side just so they can stab you in the back with your own weapon after." He crossed his hands against his front. "Why listen to them when you can make your own mottos? Lead your own kind." He raised a brow, inquisitively. "Start your own interspecies revolution.” 

"That's what you're trying to do?" I asked in disbelief.

He nodded, confidently. "That's what I hope to achieve. Yes."

"You're insane." I chuckled out.

"No, dear. I'm a reformist." He challenged. "I'm the oppressed in this world, but my voice isn't silenced as yet." He shrugged slowly while twisting his lips. I looked to Larry with the same expression of utter astonishment as he continued, "Why not use it? I still have the ability to fit into society's everyday. Maybe," He stressed. "Just maybe, I can use it for the good of my kind. I can get to them and I can inform.” 

My eyebrows furrowed as Larry nodded towards him. I looked to see that he'd raised a finger eye level.

"Inform them? On their powers?"

He smirked like I was a toddler asking for a piece of candy. I suddenly felt small under his gaze. "You know so little, my dear." His head shook. "But you're one among many. And, the difference between them and you is you're curious. And, you're strong." He clapped before pointing towards Larry and I. "The both of you. You two share a want for survival. A hunger. And, it's not only to live, but it's to live as a hybrid. You don't want to let go of that trait. That sense of self. It's important."

I looked down to the sheets covering my body as I heard Larry's whisper in his thoughts. I could feel his sadness overpowering his aura. I knew why. In reality, he didn't want this fate, as a hybrid, but this stranger didn't need to know that.

"So, you want us here so you can protect us?"

He shook his head. "I want you here to help me teach our kind how to unite in an inhumane world."

"Don't you mean human?" Larry said.

"No." The man peeped looking back and forth between us. "I know what I said. The truth is son," He crossed his arms and shrugged. "They're not as human as you think they are."

Ray was a man of not manipulation, but knowledge. Larry and I learned that after while and soon he was the man we confided in. We threw all of our eggs in one basket and trusted that we had the best.

 He'd found the base some time before he found us, explaining how empty and rugged it was. We'd been the first hybrids that found a reason to put our trust in him so we built a foundation of the firm with him. It took time. It took blood. It took sweat. It took hidden tears, but we structured it the best we could, while gathering our allies in one place.

But, we also learned the place had secrets hidden within its creases and cracks. Gruesome ones that would leave any hybrid wide awake at night.

"This used to be a prison for hybrids years upon years ago. There was a time when the general public had no idea we even existed. As soon as we were conceived, they would find a way to rearrange our leave to a case of maternal death and we would be shipped to hidden places like Exhibit A."

I curled myself around Larry's free arm as Ray presented us to the transparent plastic. Behind it was a room that contained rows and rows of capsules that resembled manmade cocoons—had to be about 50 or more tucked inside one chamber. Within the oval containments were blue and pink colored blankets. The lack of light didn't help a lot with depicting much else, but I could see the faint traces of dust laid dead against the surface of them. 

"The capsules have no holes for the babies to breathe." I whispered, inquisitively. "The sides have no attachments for any type of venting or breathing room. How did they survive?"

I looked to Ray who was a ways ahead of us, already looking in the next room. He blinked at me before nodding towards the top of the door that led into the darkened room. 

I followed his gesture to find the wording marked in bold: Early Leave.

My throat closed and my muscles tightened, while my veins turned to icicles in one sweep. My mouth fell agape and disbelief left me speechless leaving the silent sadness to speak for me. I felt the anger rising from my stomach. Larry's arm suffered the worst from my reaction due to my nails seeping into the skin of his trapped arm, but he didn't pull away. He didn't even budge. He understood.

"They didn't." Larry swallowed, looking into the room before looking back to Ray. 

Ray lowered his eyes before dithering between the floor and his flexing hand below him. Looking back to us, he nodded his head toward the long hallway we'd been walking. "Lets keep going."

The curtains were being drawn and the gap between human and hybrid began to grow wider and wider the more Ray told us. He held nothing back and told us straight up what our build-up, our history in homo sapien society consisted of despite our age. We were still teenagers, still young in maturity, but he made us grow with his words and his tasks he constantly laid on us.

 We were trained. We were given tests that taught us what to do in any human-hybrid interaction situation. Our communicative skills were perfected, our medical aid abilities were honed, and our sense of direction, sharpened. It was an ongoing process that took years, but he never shunned us. He only critiqued and constructively criticized.

With our training and education in hybrid history increasing, our want and love for humans gradually decreased. Ray always told us never to hate them, but to be cautious of what they're capable of when misunderstood. It was hard not to hate the person that was continuously oppressing you and spitting in your face because they assumed you were inferior, but then again dangerous. We didn't understand their strategy of conquer-and-kill when lost. It didn't register to us that they only did such ungodly things to protect themselves. But then again, we didn't see ourselves as dangerous. We saw ourselves as targeted and also as half of what they were. We still do. All in all, we're still in danger.

 We're still stomped on and thrown into a pit of rejection and rebuke. To keep a healthy mindset knowing you're unwanted in your only place of reside is difficult. It's a challenge that we face everyday—that we faced everyday. Ray made sure we were well and hidden from the harmful, but what do you do when your mind is the biggest threat to your existence?

"To start a revolution, you must start a war, correct?" I looked into the same bleak eyes of the person I'd been idolizing for the past 6 months now. They were the same as when I first saw them. Hard, but placid. "That's what they do."

"They." He said.

I stood and leaned against the metal of Larry's bunk. We'd found more stable bunks in the right cohort of the prison. Ray inferred it had been set up for the head officials of the firm to sleep in. I suggested that we should just move into the rooms, but he went against it. The walls were too creaky and the location too deep within the base. He ended up deciding it was more meant for storage of some kind or an emergency meet up room. I didn't argue and Larry couldn't care less.

"The humans." Larry chimed in. We'd been talking about this for a while so it was basically rehearsed between us. Ray's was the only dialogue being added. "They go for war to reform. Revolution is war."

 "Violence is the only way to attain power." I added.

Ray looked at us before rising from my bottom bunk, and slowly walking to the middle of the room. We watched as he silently tucked his hands in his pockets and then turned towards us with a hardened expression that spiked an icy jolt up my spine.

"The only way." He repeated, flickering his eyes to mine. "Where did you learn this, Cera?"

"From history." I shrugged. "From the books."

"From history, huh?" He nodded, curling his lip. "American history, I presume?"

I nodded slowly, inching towards Larry who was perched on his bunk. 

"Ah, I see." Ray continued. "It makes plenty sense. American Revolutionary—the American War of Independence. End of the first British Empire and the United States comes of it. World War I—Allied victory. Germans, Russians, and Ottoman Empires lose, but we prosper." He snapped and pointed at me. "And then, World War II—1939-1945—Allied wins again. The Japanese fall and we bomb Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Again, we make it through the war and things are all great." Ray placed his hand back in his pocket and leaned towards Larry. "Momentarily.” 

His shoulders shrugged. "The books don't pertain to us." He said. "They only pertain to them because they've built a foundation on destruction. They've started with it and so just like a lie—just like a fib—they have to keep going with it because it's what they know works. Just because the enemy is doing it doesn't mean that it's the right way. Doesn't mean it's the only way." He raised a finger. "It means it's the cultured way." 

I watched as he pointed to his side. "That's not our culture. They made that very clear to us. I know my facts and I know what your books say. I've read them twenty times over trying to find a way to kick dirt back in their faces with the same exact tactic you're using." He shook his head. "Don't let them suck you into their game. All it leaves you with is burden and guilt." He said. "That's the worst form of torture for a hybrid." 

"Yes sir." I peeped, weakly.

I didn't hear Larry's response.

"Son?" Ray eased. 

Larry breathed a hefty sigh before giving in, "Yes sir." 

"You two are worth more than that. Don't let them convince you otherwise."

Larry and I spent days trying to find a way not to live in their society, but construct our own that was more superior to theirs. We wanted to show our worth instead of solemnly living in their ignorance. We felt like prisoners. We felt like our voices weren't being heard and we were being restricted by not them, but ourselves. It was frustrating to have Ray constantly telling us to accept our place under them when we knew we were better. Stronger. Faster. More intelligent. Our abilities are double their capabilities and yet they were the ones free to frolic the Earth while we were given the fate to hide if we chose something other than their normal path.

We wanted to make a mockery out of them to show how much of a joke they actually were to us. Yet, we were taught to respect them, for they were a part of us. We just weren't a part of them.

"We're going to start saving hybrids."

I looked to Larry who was already looking at me. My back occupied his torso. I could feel his heart racing against my skin. It matched mine.

"I think you two are ready." Ray finished, looking between us. 

It was the day that we feared would come too soon. We'd been living with Ray for a good two years and some change so we knew it was near. We knew he would be coming to us with instruction on missions and information on facilities sooner than later, but that didn't stop us from feeling undertrained. I still felt like that 18 year old waking up to oblivion surrounding her—ignorance being bliss and Larry being present. I still wanted to hide. I still wanted to run away from my reality and tuck myself away.

This was all so sudden and time had gone so fast. It was almost unbelievable that he was coming to us with this.

 "I know you're scared and I know you're feeling a bit uneasy at the moment, but trust me you're more than prepared." He nodded, waiting for us to nod in return. We both did, but very weakly. "I believe in you two. You're my prodigies and I'm more than proud of what you've become. Y'all are my pride. My family."

I lowered my eyes to Larry's shivering hand that rested in mine. When I let go of it, I noticed it was me who was shuddering. Larry couldn't have grabbed it back any quicker.

Ray placed his hand on our conjoined ones and squeezed them together. "I believe in you so believe in yourselves. Believe in your kind and your ability. You're an advanced hybrid." He smiled wearily at the both of us. "Don't show them, but show yourself. You're worth more than any human and those hybrids out there need you to protect them." I smiled some as he looked at Larry. "Do what you gotta do, son." When his eyes moved to mine, I straightened up.

"Because believe it or not, y'all are more than superior. And by natural selection, my dear, those who are superior, are the future."

"When did you bring her back?"

"She get here yesterday. Shut up or leave. She resting." Larry.

I lye still as voices filled the room. The scruffs of shoes told me the two weren't the only ones present.

"How you gonna be illiterate and then tell me to shut up? You don't deserve that right." I rolled my eyes underneath my eyelids as the energetic squeak of a voice spewed the insult.

I knew Larry would get mad. Ty always knew how to tick him off—tick everyone off.

"Je vais diviser votre crâne. Regarder votre bouche. (I'll split your skull. Watch your mouth.)" Larry spat back. 

The few weird chuckles that followed came from Laurent since he was the only one that fully understood his dialect besides me. I moved to lie on my back, but didn't show any signs of consciousness. I already knew the hybrids in the room by their stench. Every one of them has a distinct smell that differentiates them from another. Stalling is the word I'm looking for.

"She still got a body. Those shorts hugging them thighs, man." Ty runs off of pure energy. We call him the triple AAA hybrid, but the actual term is an elan hybrid. He’s the most energetic I’ve by far though.

"Ty, I will end you."

"Ty, you know good and well you wouldn't even think of saying that if she was up." The country twang of Aadi. She's a stand up kind of girl--tracker hybrid. "Larry finna wring your throat if you slip up and say something too reachy."

"What? I'm only praising her for what God's blessed her with. It would be disrespectful if I didn't."

"You're defining her worth by basing your judgment off of your attraction to her. It's called sexualization." Toni—healer hybrid. "Try praising her ability to–"

 "This has nothing to do with mistogony or periods. Be quiet." Ty grunted.

"It's misogyny you incognizant prick. Learn your vocabulary before you tell Larry anything."

"Thank you, Toni." Larry cooed, behind their argument.

"Brother, don't touch Toni. She secretly a succubus. That feminist shit just a cover up." I heard a squeal come from Laurent, the elan hybrid, following his speech, telling me Toni had gotten to him before he could scurry away from her dangerous offense. 

Aadi and Ty's laughs and Larry's rebutting shouts confirmed the beat down she was serving him for his extensive mouth.

"Why are we in here? She's sleeping. We're only disturbing her." The mellow tone of Raël—sensor hybrid. We share the same type. "Ray said to check on her. I think we've overcompensated our stay. Let’s go.”

"Raël, do you ever shut up and just not be the cryptic ass middleman in a conversation? Nobody asked for your questionable, either-or input. Choose a fucking side for a change."

 "I didn't hear a question. It was an order. A command. A statement. Be quiet. I'll feed you sugar again."

 I opened my eyes the same time Ty decided to pounce on his victim. The laughs and hollers came from the far end of the room where Aadi and Laurent stood, as expected, hanging off one another. Larry took the task of holding a raging Ty back, while Toni went back and forth between the opponents with her scolding.

I watched the scene while sitting up and planting my feet on the floor to take my normal, leaned position. My side throbbed from the healing scar taking over my ribcage, but I managed to disguise the pain through expression.

 Larry felt my mental reaction to the pain, which is why he noticed my awakening first.

I slowly put a finger to my lips as his features softened and his grip loosened from Ty's arms.

 "Larry! Don't let go of him!" Toni yelled as Ty began to charge to Raël. 

I looked towards the doorframe where Raël stood with the most condescending smirk perking his lips. His eyes flickered to me as he held Ty back with a hand to the chest. 

"Welcome back." He said, letting his lips pull back into a full smile.

I nodded his way before rising from my bed and grabbing my shirt from the floor.

"Cera!" I didn't have to look up to know who was headed my way. Instead, I began to walk towards the tiny sink a few feet away from the bunks. Tossing my shirt back to the bed, I twisted the nozzles so the water would overpower his speech.

"Don't touch me." I ordered as I felt Ty's hands nearing my shoulders. Quickly moving to the side, I dodged his feverish hands and reached for my toothbrush. 

"You've been gone for so long. I wanted to give you a welcome back hug, you know. I know you've missed me."

I didn't say anything in return, merely continued brushing. To respond to Ty is to respond to a fool. He's a jester—not to be taken seriously at any moment.

"Ty, you're not going to get anything out of her." Aadi advised from across the room. "You know Cera is a cold heart and a hollow soul. She ain't the emotional kind."

I reached for the nuzzles, and slowly twisted them off so the rust would make the metal creak. I heard a mixture of pained shouts come from behind me, Aadi's in particular.

"I'm only telling the truth, Cera! Gollee!" She groaned. "There's no reason to be a mean about it."

 I spit foam into the sink before turning and leaning my bottom on the edge of the ceramic piece so I could take everyone in. All of the sensor and tracker hybrids were holding their ears, while the rest were eyeing me—one roguishly, one deliberately, and another unblinkingly.

I found the unreadable stare the most alluring, but because of whom it belonged to, I decided against it. Instead, I glared at Ty and then slowly moved my eyes to Larry who had found a seat on my disheveled bunk. When he saw me looking down at the messy sheets, he sighed and began to make it up without much effort.

 I lowered my stare and then shot my attention to an irritated Aadi.

"Everyone met with Ray, I heard." I spoke before turning and spitting my remaining toothpaste into the sink. I twisted the nozzle quickly, watching the foam drain.

"He just gone over some new missions for the retrievers that Larry can tell you about. Me and buddy over here showed him some new ideas for combat." I could see Aadi look up to Laurent through the sink mirror. He was taking false jabs as she spoke. "Raë and Ty showed him some new tech equipment that could be of use and Toni Ton just put in some request for vaccines and such. Nothing major."

"He told us to come welcome you back while he took care of business." Raël said. I turned to look at him. "He didn't say anything about coming as well, but I'm sure his visit will be when no one's present."

 The look on his face told me he knew that was what I was looking for. I cursed his inference, but didn't let my frustration with his ability to read between the lines so accurately show. Instead, I just nodded my gratitude and began to move towards my bed again.

"Thank you, Larry." I whispered as he smoothed a hand over my wrinkled sheets.

He nodded before sitting back down in his prior space and scooting over for me.

I shook my head.

"Well, welcome back, Ce. It's been quiet around here without you." Toni said with a smile.

 "Usually it's dead silent when you're here. It's nice to have that back, right guys?” 

"So help me god, Ty, I will rip out your vocal chords if you say one more thing.”

"You can't take a fucking joke, Toni?! Jeez. I'm playing with her."

"No one likes when you play with them, Ty. Especially Cera. Don't you realize that by now?"

"Toni, you like when I play with you, right?"

"Laurent, do not get on my nerves twice in a day before the 12th hour hits, I will be authorized to kill you."

Ray said he’d stop by sometime tonight when things simmer down.

I turned my attention to Larry, who was already looking at me.

How many missions do we have? 

Larry's lips twisted as I sat down next to him and turned back to our fussing teammates. While Ty and Toni went at it, Aadi was scolding Laurent for picking at Toni every time she pivoted to respond back to Ty. 

I looked to the doorframe, which still held a calm Raël. His eyes weren't on the festivities, they were on me. He smiled immediately when we caught contact. Pushing himself off the edge of the frame, he winked at me and made his exit, disappearing into the dim light of the hallway behind him. I didn't take my eyes off the entranceway until Larry telepathically whispered my way.

We don't have until next week. Ray thinks it's best if you rest up a little.

 I eyed him, but he didn't look my way.

I agree with him.

The add-on was unnecessary to me, but I took it for him-for his wellbeing.

My health is much less life threatening than those hybrids waiting for us out there. I hope you know that.

 Larry sniffed the same time Toni took her first blow at Laurent. I watched his feet maneuver his body out of her reach with advanced precision and accuracy. He'd been training rather hard lately. I could tell. I had to ask him what his regime looked like later. Maybe he could mold some rough edges of mine when it comes to combat.

The human in me knows, but the other guy is having a hard time conforming to that. I'd much rather give in to him than side with the same kind that hurt you.

"And, that's not him talking, that's me."

I didn't look his way as he turned to me. Leaning my elbows on my knees, I nodded.

"We go as soon as the scar forms. No rebuttal."

I heard him sigh through his nose irritably, but I didn't expect much more. He knew me. Once my mind was set on a decision then there was no going back. He’d have to conform to my word whether he liked it or not because if he didn't it meant I would be going alone.

"I going to the combat corner." I watched him rise from my bunk and stretch his arms over his head. "Come with me.” 

I shook my head, watching Laurent lift Toni and start to carry her towards the entrance. Ty, and Aadi followed close behind their laughs echoing down the length of the narrow hall, even when they'd gotten to the end of it.

"I'm good." He sucked his teeth, poking my ankle with a foot as I lifted it onto the bed, and stretched out my limbs. “I’m not in the mood to be treated like a toddler.”

"I not treat you like kid."

"You'll be monitoring me by the millisecond."

"You too stubborn to do it yourself." He grumbled in response, his frame already turning towards the door to head out.

I placed my hands behind my head watching him exit the room and turn down the hall, his footsteps distancing towards the outer region of the left wing. 

I sighed through my nose, closing my eyes tight before relaxing them.

Within minutes, I heard light footsteps of rubber soles slowing as he approached the door again.

"Combat was that boring?"

"Shut up."

I smirked keeping my eyes shut as he uncrossed my legs and pushed himself between the tight wedge, cupping his arms under my thighs. His bottom hung off the end of the bed and his head lay directly at the center of my abdomen, his chest melting into my pelvis.

"You're tired." I acknowledged once he settled.

I could feel it in his aura and the fatigue of his limbs resting against my thighs. He didn't respond.

"Sleep." I breathed, pushing my fingers into the start of his hair set in twists. He grabbed my wrist and pushed it fully into his abyss of his black tresses. I didn’t refrain.

He hummed his satisfaction.

"Don't worry." I said taking his thoughts into account. "I'll be here when you wake."

[zerohour-fic-blog]

This story is greatttttttttt. I stumbled upon it and I couldn't go to bed until I read both chapters

AH!!! im glaaad! tyty

[zerohour-fic-blog]

I'm loving this so much. From the very first chapter I got X-files (the original and the reboot) vibes...I was completely obsessed with the X-files when I was little, so you know I'm enjoying tf out of this. lol

im glad youre enjoying it, deary! hope ya continue to. 

[zerohour-fic-blog]

This fic is well written and very cool!!

thank you!!!!!!

[zerohour-fic-blog]

chapter two

My lungs feel like the gravel under my feet as I trudge up the mineral mount hill. My breathing is scarce and the splutters of respiration moving in and out of my nose and mouth aren't helping like it's supposed to. My calves feel like jelly and my thighs, like their weighted with 100 pound dumbbells. I'm home again.

 The breeze against my face mixes with the hot aura I've created from exhaust and it feels amazing. The constant temperature change of my body regulates what I need to keep pumping my legs and arms and I deem grateful. It's been so long since I've felt like this. 

So long since I've risen at the rise of day to whisper hello to the still dark plates of the sky. The sunrise in the distance stretches over mountains that I've climbed before and the sky changes its hues in regards to it. There are no homes, no obvious evidence of civilization in these early mornings and I familiarize myself with it again.

I am a free woman. So are my thoughts and my concerns. I can whisper them to the dirt under my feet and scream them off mountaintops because I am free. I am here.

My arms pump against the contradicting winds forcing them to use more strength than needed. I pick up my pace and move into a steady sprint that encourages momentum.

My chest burns asking for relief or regain. I don't listen. I let the pain push me to a height greater than my usual level of discomfort and my trigger rejoices.

The start of my throat feels like sandpaper and I restrain from swallowing. My water bottle clanks against the keys dangling from my hip, but I disregard it. I want sanity, but I can only attain it from dementia. From physical pain that will push the emotional toll down my throat and let it rumble inside my belly for just a bit longer.

I taste the sweat on my tongue and it dissipates into sour nothingness. I lick my quivering lips and bite down on my bottom to control the exhaust surging through my limbs, but it only encourages bile to rise, reminding me of my strength—of my unchanging persistence.

I spit in its face by speeding up. The trail is steep and growing, but I can see my goal. I can see my stop. My definition of prosper is so close. 

I pivot myself to hit a curve and the friction of my feet against rock turns too quickly for me to catch it. I look down and try to stop myself with the grips of my shoes, but my speed curses me and I slide too close to the edge to rim it.

The moment my foot slides off the brim of the cliff, I scream and the sounds echo out making the moment seem surreal. My ankle bends and steps on the curve of a rock below, giving me time to latch onto a nearby boulder.

My heartbeat matches the quickening contractions of my lungs as I try to pull myself up. I feel myself starting to panic and the hot of my cheeks tell me my time is thinning.

"Shit.”

I look down at the veins in my arms and the crimson color starts to surface through the pigment of my skin. I look down to the patch against my hip and my vision begins to distort the color of the sky.

"Fuck." I breathe, hastily. "Just breathe." My self-guide isn't helping and I can feel my breathing thinning.

I can feel the migraine pounding my temples and my throat closing into a false barricade.

"It's not real." I try to convince myself out of the state, but all I feel is deranged. All I feel is the thumping and throbbing of my face and body. Everything is happening at once and the pit of demented is getting deeper and deeper and deeper. "It's not fucking real, Cera. Get up."

I close my eyes and try to bend my left leg, which is still perched on the cliff. The rock scratches my underthigh and I snarl my pain out of existence.

My eyes flutter closed to disguise the real black of the coming demise of sanity and a picture flickers behind my eyelids.

I see him and he's with me. He's here and he's not gone and he's smiling.

The image is blurry at first, but when the mirage clears I see the face of my health of mind. He's reaching out to me and he's whispering the words that level my breathing. I feel the placid surfacing from the contained ball of my soul and it’s not as far as I thought it was.

You're fine.

"Yes."

Pull yourself up, Ce. Real slow.

I curl my fingers around the edge of the nearby boulder and my foot rises from the cleft rock below. My body pulses and I can feel myself losing my ground again. He doesn't let me.

I'm here. Now, open your eyes and keep pulling. Don't worry about anything else. You're fine.

I peek at the trail and reach for another close rock before slightly lifting it and digging it into the earth, creating leverage for myself. I hear his encouragement as I start to pull my limber limbs onto the cliff again.

I'm bone-tired so I lay in the gravel for a while. I can still feel his spiritual presence. The sun that falls on my skin heats my back through my gear.

I get up and walk the rest of the way to the top of the mountain before sitting against a giant center rock.

When I hear his footsteps, I don't turn. I don't pivot. I let him walk to me and soon he's a level below me with his knees perched up to his chest.

"You're not as strong as you used to be." Larry said.

I grin before leaning my palms on the ridges of the rock behind me. I watch birds flutter their wings in the distance and admire how they flock together as a tribe—as one. It reminds me of our kind.

"As long as I get back to that point in strength, I can admit that." I said.

"Just don't kill yourself first."

I vaguely smiled. "Death can be a motivation."

"But, it also can't be reversed."

"Take your own advice."

"I will if you will." He prompted.

"You can't bribe someone into promising something they have no control over. Death is the only form of fate."

"Such a fairytale ending, Cerafine. You should start writing kid books."

"If I was supposed to die back there, I would've. It wasn't a time for me. That's why I didn't."

"So, I had nothing to do with that?" Larry questioned. "If I didn't guide you through that you would be still alive?"

"I'm alive because you were there. If you weren’t, I wouldn't be." I acknowledged. "I'm not afraid to admit the truth, Larry.”

"I know." He said it in a way I knew he was telling the truth. “You're just afraid to admit when you're wrong."

"You've learned to live with it."

He chuckled and pivoted his frame my way. When his fingers brushed my naked calf, I looked down at him to find a hint of a smirk perking the side of his lips. It's been awhile since I've seen him smile in person. My mental images were momentarily satisfying when I was tucked in the depths of the ward, but they were nothing like the real thing. They were just fragments of the imagination and didn’t hold much life. All Larry holds is the absence of bland.

"You’re different.” He said. I watched the wind blow the thin tips of his hair towards the earth. The coming sunrise made them look like illuminate bulbs. “I don’t know if it’s good or bad.”

I didn’t speak, but let his thoughts linger in the atmosphere. I let them linger in the underskirts of my conscience.

“You’re tense.” He continued. “I feel it.”

I flickered my eyes to his. My lips pursed slightly when I noticed the squinted essence of them. It meant he was thinking. I could feel him forcing me out of his thoughts. I could’ve pushed through the barrier he was holding up, but my run had exhausted me to hardly caring. I just let him speak his mind into existence. I let him be human.

“I’m fine.” I rebutted. “Worry for other things before you think yourself into a frenzy.”

“You were in the ward for a while, Ce. That’s a lot of stress, you know. Especially when you don’t have another person to hold you together.”

I traced the outline of his protruding cheekbones before dropping my hand into the middle of my lap. “I took care of myself.”

“You’re strong, I know. That doesn’t mean it didn’t take a lot out of you though.” He raised a brow. “The way you reacted on that cliff wasn’t normal. Your panic nearly pushed you into a frenzy. Stress affects every form of cognition that exists. Physical symptoms are there too-“

“My mind has weakened as well as my body, but I’ll be back to normal soon. Besides, stress enhances focus, strength, and stamina. It speeds reaction time. Tightens muscles and produces adrenaline.”

“When you’re in danger.” He stressed moving both eyebrows up. “If that’s your regular reaction to everyday activities then that’s just called having physical or psychological illness.”

“I’m nothing to worry about. I can handle myself. What’s really important is getting to hybrids before they end up like the rest.” I leaned against my knees before sighing through the canals of my nose. “You heard them, I’m sure.”

I could see him from my peripheral vision. His eyes were on my profile and his lips turned down in a grim way. He didn’t like the fact that I was ignoring his concern for me, but that conflicted with my dislike for his carelessness of the remaining hybrids. I wanted him to understand, but I knew he never would. It was how he was designed. You can’t control a hybrid’s thoughts because their trigger molds it.

“I heard them, yes, but I heard you for miles.” He admitted. “Their screams were the blur behind your wails.”

My words remain unsaid.

“I can feel you, Cera. I’m connected to you, not them. Everything you’re feeling right now, I’m feeding off of whether I like it or not.” He acknowledged. “When you were on the edge of that cliff, I almost killed myself trying to get up here. I felt your physical strain. I felt your anger. I felt your satisfaction. I felt your want to forget. Everything was so overwhelming and I felt it. That ward did something to you. I feel it and I’m not dropping it until you tell me. It’s gnawing at me and I need the confirmation.”

I thinned my lips and let out a heavier sigh this time around. His frustration wasn’t present, but I could feel desperation aligning his slight panic. He was sensitive without any form of stabilizer in his vein. The choice just made things worse.

My eyes met his hard ones. I closed my eyes and bit my tongue to stop the tingling sensation surfacing its buds. “You’re killing yourself.”

He blinked, but never took his gaze from me. The stare he held never flickered or transitioned into some other reveal of emotional toll.

“The day before I came for you, I felt a sharp pain on my side while I sleep.” He lifted the fabric of his shirt to reveal the left side of his ribcage. My eyes watched as his fingers skimmed the length of his skin before I looked back to his gaze. “My brother feel it too. It went from under the breast to the middle of my rib.” He dropped his shirt. “Why?”

I didn’t take my attention away from him, but I did drop the mental barricade I’d been building. I held his stare as his eyebrows rose and his mouth gaped. I could see the anger curling his forehead as he moved towards me, his hands going for the elastic of my muscle tank.

“Turn.” He commanded.

I stood and pivoted my frame so my left side would face his front. He flicked my bicep ordering me to lift it. One hand went for the hem of my shirt while another moved down the side of my clothed ribcage. My jaw tightened and my face ticked, but I held my hardened expression.

“When you find time for this?”

I knew he was referring to the bandage that took over the expanse of my torso. Faint images of the work I’d went through the night prior to tend to my wound flashed in my mind. When he picked up on them, he nodded.

“Last night when everyone was sleeping.” He tilted his head before setting it upright again.

“Smart.”

“Sensible.”

“Inconsiderate.” He bit back. I stayed silent as he pulled my shirt to my midrise. The bitter expression taking over his features irritated me as he reached around my waist to find the clipped end of the bandages.

I was keeping it from him for his own good—for his own sake and he was perturbed with my choices for his own selfish reasons.

“I didn’t feel you.” He stated instead of questioning. I took it as one anyway.

“I’m not as strong as I used to be, but I’m still strong, Larry.”

“You blocked me out.” He almost sounded offended. “Good shit.”

“You’re taking it the wrong way.” I tried.

His glare shot up to my already waiting eyes. “My partner doesn’t tell me she’s hurt knowing that I might kill myself from not knowing. So considerate, Cerafine.”

“I would think you had enough sense to take the stabilizer by then.”

“That doesn’t solve anything.”

I eyed him, harshly. “It would hold you steady. You know what the serum does. Don’t act like an idiot.” A sharp, pained take in of air from me cut the tension of our conversation in half as Larry’s pulled the last curl of bandage from my stomach.

We both looked down towards the bloodied gauze taking up majority of my ribcage. Larry’s panic surfaced and the goose bumps moved along my skin as well. They felt like spiders creating complex webs under the top layer of my epidermis. I looked up to the dithering look in Larry’s eyes before peering over to the now risen sun. The orbs were varying between concern and perturbation and I decided I wanted to witness neither.

“You didn’t clean it this morning?” He questioned, still eyeing the crusty patch of red. The wary sound of his voice told me he was disguising the shake underlying it and I sighed.

I looked down at the gruesome sight before looking up to his alert expression again. I looked at his arms and began to move my fingers over the maroon lines fading in and out of his bronzed skin.

“No.” I stated, feeling his fingers pulling the edge of the top gauze from its place. I flinched, making him stop suddenly. “Easy.”

He nodded and began to remove it again. I watched his inquisitive eyes squint into tight slits and I noted how much I enjoyed the brown of them. When they flashed black, I prayed they would revert back.

“Breathe..” I encouraged. “I’m fine.”

He looked back to me with the blacked out orbs and I reached for his temples. He didn’t stop me. “I’m going to kill all of them.”

The mark on my skin was slowly healing because of the lack of antibiotics. The wards that hybrids are admitted aren't that ruthless, they supply us with medical aid, but I refused it. They'd marked me with metal and fire—I'd been permanently branded—so I wanted nothing they offered me, including the nurses' tried sympathy.

I pushed my hands into the back of his hair and began to massage the spot. My fingers moved in and out of the black essence of the curled twists to push against his neck in a soothing tenderizing motion. I felt his breath brush my forehead as his exhales turned to throaty growls.

“Calme-toi. (Calm down.)” His body tensed as I moved my fingers to the middle of his cranium and the massaging commenced again. “Look at me and count to 40.”

I saw the dementia lacing his features as his body convulsed within my personal space. We’d been through this plenty of times before. This was just another tally to mark down on his list of brinks because of me.

As I listened to his throaty voice scratch against my eardrums, I encouraged him to hold onto me despite my injuries. He needed to feel in control and that meant he needed something to grasp that wouldn’t fight him. He needed to think thoughts that weren’t hostile—that didn’t involve death or reapers. Larry needed to be in control of his words. Counting was the best outlet for that. And, finally he needed to know he had control over the situation, which was the problem.

I had been harmed and he had no say or jurisdiction in that. His trigger had been set off unexpectedly and since he has nothing in his system to hold him, it was my job to do exactly that. If I could be the problem, I could also be the solution.

“They branded you.” He struggled to growl out the words. I blinked as his pupils varied between its natural color and the white and brown contrast I was looking for. “They fucking branded you and I couldn’t do anything about it. I knew I should’ve w-went sooner.”

“You came just in time, Larry.” I whispered, moving my palms up and down his arms. “You came just in time.”

I watched the sweat on his forehead surface and the gurgle of drool splutter from the corners of his mouth. The sight made my veins ice and I pressured his forearms to calm the storm producing thunder in my gut.

“You came.” I thinned my lips. “That’s all that matters.”

-

“I hate humans.”

I felt his hand moving over the ball of my left deltoid as he passed to grab another gauze off the metal counter. His hands felt cold against my skin as he moved down towards the waiting wound. I didn’t move, just stared at the cabinet portion of the metallic appliance in front of me.

“I hate that they think they better. I hate they shit ability. I hate every one of them.”

“You’re half of what they are.” I reasoned. “You hate yourself.”

“Don’t fuck with me, Ce. I not in the mood for your shit.”

I simply smiled as I felt his hands smooth over the fresh gauze being taped against my raw flesh. I refrained from flinching the best I could. When he patted my hip, I rose and reached for the bandages hanging off the counter. The pain was slight, but Larry noticed my weak shudder.

“They think they so more better.” He whispered as he began to twirl the bandage against my firm abdomen and around my bent back. “They so much more…”

“Humane.” I helped.

He groaned against the skin of my back. “Why I let you make me take this stabilizer shit?”

I grinned to myself as he carefully moved the thin, cotton fabric around the circumference of my torso. I’d convinced him to let up and consume the serum once we got back to the base.

He didn’t argue because he was vulnerable. He was weary and worn. That’s what an episode of pre-blackout can do to you. It’s a process that exhausts you and leaves you with weak limbs, a weak mind, and a dry fight. I took complete advantage of it and gave him my next injection. It first, calmed him from his prior episode, and second, reassured me. I needed to know he was stable and despite his nagging now, I obtained exactly that.

“Humans are humans. For the most part, our alien nurtures our human side so you’re basically insulting your extraterrestrial.” I watched as he clipped the gauze to its end. I began to stand, but his hands moved to my shoulders before I could think. “Think like Ray. Just think of them as misunderstanding. They’re fickle and easy to judge.”

Larry sucked his teeth. “Ray only say that because he have weakness for humans.” He scoffed before moving his palms down my bare arms. I felt him ease down my left arm that held inked art along the length of it. He tilted his head and began to create tiny circles around the curves of the artistry. “He fall in love with them because he want to be one.”

I eyed him from my peripheral as he admired my marked skin. “I remember you were the same once upon a time.” I snatched my arm from him before rising from the long bench. “Don’t mock your past.”

Larry’s eyes never left me and nor did his mind’s eye.

“Knock, knock.”

Both of our heads craned towards the door to see a smiley Laurent poking his head in. I flickered my eyes down towards the paper swinging from his hand before moving towards the bunk beds in the corner of the tight room.

“Tell me something good.” I said bending behind my bottom bunk and reaching for a water bottle.

Laurent looked towards his brother who was picking up all of the bloodied scraps he’d used on my wound before hopping over to me and sliding into the space of my bunk. I tilted my head and gestured with a hand for him to give me my report.

“The devil brand you with they mark for you.” His reference to the human species made my lips turn up. Him and his twin were one in the same. “It don’t mean evil, don’t mean destruction. Nothing like that.” He flicked the paper he’d been crumpling my way and I swiftly caught it between two fingers. “It mean not identical to.”

I eyed the symbol on the paper that was now forever branded in my skin. It was a triple bar with a diagonal slash going through its middle. On the sheet, it was all black, but my skin was now a lighter brown than my regular pigment. I chewed on my lip and squinted at the photo before looking back to a waiting Laurent.

“It means what?”

“Not identical to.” He said it slowly this time letting the phrase register.

I looked to Larry who was already eyeing the both of us. I gestured with a quick head nod for him to make his way over. He leaned down slowly to pick up one more alcohol wipe and after discarding of it, began to move across the room.

“Not identical to what?” Larry questioned.

Laurent looked to him as he pulled the paper from my possession and began to gaze at it.

“Not identical to humans.” I whispered, looking at Laurent. “They’re trying to convey the message that although we look like them we’re still inferior.”

“Bingo.” Laurent pointed at me before leaning on his elbows. “Pretty fucking condescending, right?”

“Why they mark you with it though?” Larry questioned next.

Laurent’s gaze moved to his brother before trailing back to me. “They only mark you with it?”

“I wouldn’t know.” I admitted. “I would assume it’s a universal thing though. A way to identify us.”

“No.” Laurent rebutted. “If they want to identify you, they put it on a place you no hide. Your hand. Your face. Some place you have to show.”

Larry reasoned, “If they already have you, why they mark you? It like marking animal you already have.”

I looked at Larry. “People mark their animals for stamp of property.”

“If it a stamp for property, it a stamp of pride. That fucking sick.” Laurent added, his face twisting in utter disgust. “Humans sick in the fucking head, man.”

I shook my head. “That’s not it. There’s more. There’s some type of strategy in this.” I pushed my hands through my hair. “They branded me because I’m of use.” My eyes moved to Larry’s widened ones.

“We get out the ward too easily.” Larry spoke.

Laurent and I watched as he turned towards the medical aid workstation we’d just moved from before looking back to my curious eyes.

“Think about it.” He gestured with a hand towards the invisible matter. “I walk in there. No one question me. No one ask where I go. I basically walk in and out with you.”

“The ward is weak anyway. I could’ve gotten out of there by myself if I strategized right.” I challenged.

“Exactly. You in the system. We both are. If they know you in the mental institution before then why they put you there? Why they don’t put you somewhere with high security in abandon area?” Laurent and I blinked at Larry waiting for his point. He sucked his teeth and dropped his shoulders, obviously perturbed with our lack of inference. “They want you to get out there, Cera. They set it up so they have you in that institution for me to come and take you out.”

“How do that benefit them?” Laurent piped.

Larry gaped his mouth before pushing his bottom lip under his top row of teeth and biting down on the flesh. His eyes lowered as he slowly shook his head and shrugged his shoulders weakly. “That I don’t know, brother.”

I nodded and popped the cap from my water. “Then, that’s our next step.” I said taking a swig. “What’s the purpose?”

Silence fell between the curious cracks as we all looked away from one another and settled in our thoughts.

Laurent was the first to split the quiet. “Well,” He started rising from my bunk. “I look more into this and I get back to you, Ce.” I nodded as he headed towards the door, leaving Larry and I watching him. Before he exited, he tapped the door and pointed towards us. “Ray say we have a session in 20 minutes. He don’t know you back so,” He shrugged. “Don’t stop by his room so you give him heart attack.” He smiled and winked at me before slipping out. I watched the slide door close itself.

I eyed the picture still perked in Larry’s hand before moving a hand over my gauzed side. I outlined the shape of the three lines before creating the diagonal. I breathed out a heavy sigh that burdened my chest. Looking up to him, I caught sight of the knowing in his eyes.

“Not today?” He questioned.

I took another gulp of water before shaking my head and slowly leaning into the level of my bunk.

“I tell everyone you here.”

And, with that he was gone leaving me to lay back and rest.

[zerohour-fic-blog]

you know how I feel about the concept of a man being 'weak' for a woman. the way that he fought, & went against the grain, to free Cera lets me know that his love for her (romantic or not) is going to take me the fuck out. I love Lau too.. he's protective of Larry and the fact that he accompanied Larry on the 'unapproved' mission says a ton. I wonder if he easily agreed, and if so was it because of his love for his twin or his love for Cera or both. I have a feeling the leader is gon be pressed

larry definitely has a weakness for cera. it’s so great because it’s doubled being that his trigger has to do with the (minimal) amount of people he cares about. lau always follows his brother, so that was a given. 

you’ll get a taste of cera and lau’s relationship soon. and as for raaaay…imma have you wait for that one. 

[zerohour-fic-blog]

I've been waiting (im)patiently for this for what, two years now? and now that it's here I can honestly say that I wasn't ready, nor was my edges. somehow I forgot how much joy your writing brings me, how your word usage excites me and how I always want to go off an write after reading #YOURWORK I love Cera sooo much... already. she's strong and brave and I think those characteristics will play a pivotal part in this fic. of course, I love my sweet baby Larry too...

ahhhh!!! ily brittney

[zerohour-fic-blog]

chapter one

Sponge. White. White sponge all around me.

 Black. Circles. Black circular orbs block my vision.

 I blink rapidly trying to discard of the bland walls coming for me. I hear them. I hear the screams and the taunting whimpers outside these four walls of blaring paste and I cringe. I scream and struggle in hopes of freedom. In hopes of breath for my restrained body. I try again and again and again so that I don’t have to see the sight of blaring blood--and taste the warm of it cradling in the middle of tongue. So, that I don’t have to listen to the intense whispers and wails bumping like an irregular heartbeat against the sensitive folds of my eardrum. So, that I don’t have to feel my skin being burnt by a lava rock and penetrated by a thousand stakes over and over and over. And, so that I don’t have the smell the putrid scent of...nothing.

It’s disgusting how it continuously teases my hairs and my taste buds. My fight wears to nothing but the haggard breathing swooshing past my numb gums and brittle teeth and soon my heartbeat fills my eardrums along with the thoughts of others like me and their immense and incessant agony. I stare at the blaring white and lean on the nearest barrier totally giving into my near end. I don’t blink. I don’t move. I watch. That’s when the cycle starts all over again. Everything’s in slow motion and the walls close in on me. I panic and tighten my eyelids against their wet bottoms.

 When I open them, I see nothing but white. White sponges.

 Fuck illusions.

 I sighed in relief as all the stimuli circulating around the room calmed to nothing again. My eyelids lagged over my once bulged eyes and I slowly lifted myself with the strength of my hips and the wall behind me since my arms were confined behind uncomfortable cloth and buckles.

 “I need to get the fuck out of here.” I whispered to no one—or nothing—in particular, licking the excess sweat brimming my upper lip. The salt that rested on my tongue slivered down my throat, bobbing it, violently. It’s a shame that it actually served some sort of satisfaction.

 “I need to get the fuck out of here!” My voice boomed against the four walls only making it worse for me when the sound bounced back my way full force. That served a groan from my lips and the lag of my body against the white under me again. “Fuck you too.” I whimpered, weakly.

 I’m tired. Worn. My body is withering under this straitjacket and the restraint of muscle blood flow is starting to take over everything that’s at or over physical dependence. That’s literal. I’m not taking any of the drugs they’re giving as much as I can fight it. I refuse to. That would be basically giving myself up and everyone in this damned place. I’ve never been the person to throw up a white flag as soon as things got a little hectic. Even though, I’m starting to realize, hectic is a bit of an understatement.

 When you’re stuck behind four walls of nothing but plush with nothing keeping you company, but the lingering voices of others filling the walls of your brain, you start to go a little crazy. I promise you a hundred percent I’m anything but insane but this confinement of faint wails and pleas can get to you. It’s like a tape put on repeat a thousand times in a row. A never-ending cycle that usually clouds the senses.

 In my world, the psychological capacities are enhanced. I feel more, I hear more, I see more. Taste. Everything shoots past its average level of normal and drives me nuts. But I’m not insane. I promise.

 “Please be quiet.” I pleaded.

 Turning over on my stomach, I closed my eyes and tried to shut them out. “I know you’re scared. I know you’re hurting. I’ll help you, I promise. Just please let me rest.” I pressed my lips together tight and tried to concentrate on anything else other than their ongoing struggle but nothing seemed to help. I couldn’t redirect my attention. My brainpower was literally useless at this point. They had latched themselves onto the insides of my nerves and were raking at the sensitive buds profusely. “Do you even hear me? Is anyone stable?”

 Kneading my chin into the spongy ground, I focused pass the audible cries and listened for anything that wasn’t incoherent. “Come on...you have to be out there somewhere. Hear me…” Nothing. “Hear me…” I rolled on my back. “Concentrate...and hear me.”

 I cringed as a screech pierced through my concentration. I could feel my heart pounding against my chest plate like a hammer beginning to break a brick wall. My trigger was coming again. “Hear me...please.” I begged, backing into a wall as the others surrounding me growled into the air. “H-hear m-me. Listen. Please.” Closer. “Fuck! Someone! Do you hear me?!” I could see the black orbs moving over my vision.

 When I screamed the creak of the door adjacent me overpowered it. Scurrying away from the entrance, I backed into the farthest corner my lungs working themselves as my breathing jumped and skipped. I scrunched my nose into a tight scowl seeing the tall figure’s silhouette before anything else. A black foot stepped onto the sponge making my toes curl as the mystery person pushed a tray of syringes and wobbling glassed liquid on a moving cart. If I didn’t know from the bland uniform then the portable hint was a giveaway. It was medicine hour. I growled deeply, snarling, as the blackened figure closed the door slowly and stalked their way to the nearest corner it could find.

 I studied the frame before shooting my attention to the clothed arm peeking into the light of the room. Large hands. Lanky fingers. Veins, veins, and more veins.

 The clank of the tray alarmed me, bringing my eyes back up to the moving shadow. My tongue swiped my lip as I moved into a bended crouch, my knees arching as my back leaned on the wall behind me. Huffing, I hit my head on plush so my hair would fall from my face.

 “You know what they say, right?” The man’s tone was unexpected. Furrowing my eyebrows, I straightened my torso and leveled myself with my footing so I was in a crouch. The voice sounded too familiar not to be.  

 “Mort pour Elies. (Death to Elies.)”

 My shoulders relaxed as they finally stepped into the light of the room. Smiling slightly, I plopped down on the ground resting my head on the plush again. His small grin returned my sudden relief as I peered up at nothing but chiseled features and the oval bush of hair surrounding them. His name sliding off my tongue almost resembled the sight of heaven.

 “Larry.”

 -

“Larry!” My voice hit a higher volume as he crouched in front of me. “What took you so-” His finger hit my lips as he reached behind me and gripped the buckles of my straitjacket. Nodding, I peeped, “Sorry.”

 Leaning my forehead on his, I sighed, “I hear them, Larry. They’re so loud.”

 “I know, I know. Just give me a second.” He urged. I felt him yank the straps that were taut on skin of my lower back. “You gave them trouble, I see.” He grinned, referring to how tight they’d fastened the buckles around me.

 “They tried to inject me with that...that stuff.” I explained, weakly. My head fell on his shoulder as he pulled off the white coat. I sighed in relief as the stuffy stir of the atmosphere circled around my partially naked upper half. My freed chest, neck, and arms were rejoicing. “I had to stop them, Larry.” I grinned, faintly.

 He placed his hands around my wet abdomen and gently removed me from his space. “I know.” He cooed, gripping my cheeks and pushing my head up so he could gain my eyes. “You did a great job.” He thinned his lips. “You haven’t been eating or drinking much, have you?” He sighed, twisting his mouth.

 I shook my head, deliriously. “N-no. They weren’t going to take what was mines.”

 He shook his head and slowly licked his lips. “You have too much heart for your own good sometimes, Ce.”

 I just smiled feebly, laying my head on the wall again.

 “Give me your arm.” He ordered, yanking it himself.

 I closed my eyes when I saw him reach behind his back for the obvious. Tightening my lips, I cringed when the sharp point of the syringe hit my skin. Looking down, I watched as he pushed the pale apple green antidote into my bloodstream and pulled the needle out.

 Pushing my hair from my face, he cupped my cheeks and looked into my eyes, probably searching for any signs of panic. By the unchanged look on his brow, there were none. I felt my breathing levels return to their normal rate and my head’s pounding cease. The voices faded into peeps of incoherent whispers and soon they were gone, leaving me regulated and relieved.

 He smiled, finally seeing what he was looking for. “You’re fine.” He nodded, reassuringly.

 I nodded in return feeling my eyes steady and my limbs becoming voluntary again. “We have to move fast.” I whispered, grabbing his hands and gently removing them from my now warm cheeks. I peered into his dark brown eyes one more time before looking to the darkened corner he’d come from. “You thought this through.” I assumed.

 Larry rolled his eyes irritably before grabbing my arm and putting it around his broad neck to hoist me up. “Yeah, you’re fine.” He sighed, rising from our spot. “I should have given you the syringe after we got out of here.” He said more to himself than me.

 I huffed, pulling from him and walking over to the tray. “Yeah, and that would’ve helped.” I said, sarcastically. Leaning my head on the door, I listened for any signs of guards or security on the other side. Nothing. “How did you get in here?” I whispered.

 “I fought my way through.”

 My eyes widened. Springing around, I caught his playful smirk and the annoying, childish glint that rested in his stare. Figures. Sighing, I placed my hands on my spacey hips. “We have no time for games, Larry.”

 “I never said we did, Cera.” He eyed my built frame absently, before looking back to my wondering stare and raising a brow that waited for his regard. “I forgot that they strip you. Put the jacket back on.”

 I sighed again. “You didn’t think this through.”

 He shrugged, grabbing my arm and pulling me back to the corner. “I thought about it enough to get in here. Now is the part where we think up a way to get out. You know the exits?”

 I held out my arms as he grabbed the jacket and pushed it back onto my body. His English was too good for him to have taken his needed dose today. I felt bile rise in my throat as he tightened the arms but I didn’t say anything. It was something that always happened with this process. “You didn’t take your medicine today.” I stated.

 “Do you know the exits, Cera?” I eyed him for a while as he wrapped my arms around my chest and rounded my body so he could fasten the belts.

 “Yeah," I said, finally. “The emergency exit is right behind us, one floor down.”

 I only voiced my truths since I knew no one would be in the hallways at this hour. The staff here were hardly reliable and nothing far from half-assed and lazy. Their job was to search the halls between hours—guards & nurses—but regardless of the assigned assessments they saw all of the patients as dumbfounded and mediocre. When mediocrity bounces back, I guess the knowing or the genius is never prepared.

 Humans.

 I cringed as hands cupped my armpits and pulled me to my feet. My 127-pound body was nothing compared to his strength. “Does it go off when you open it?”

 “Larry, do you hear everyone in this building?”

 “Answer me.”

 He could be so dismissive. I internally cursed him and his nonchalant way of brushing me off. “No. The alarm was broken the last time I checked. They could’ve fixed it back.”

 ���Have you heard anything?” He asked, wrapping a hand around my waist and moving me towards the door. “Past everything else.”

 I shook my head, feeling his body lean against my back as he peered down the hall through the only, tiny 2-by-4 window in the room. My ankles felt like rubber under me as I turned my front towards his chest. I needed support for my back. “No. Going through it is a risk but it’s the safest. I’ll give it that.”

 “Bon.”

 The door was open before I could protest.

 “Wheelchair to your left.” He voiced, looking down the opposite way and then disappearing back into the room. I peer down the halls, my foot tapping against the glossy floor in a nerve-wracking rhythm. I could hear footsteps in the distance, but couldn’t really adjust myself to totally find out where exactly. It could be downstairs or on the upper levels. Hell, even outside. I hadn’t had AHS in my system in a while so it made sense that I was still pretty shaky with pinpoint accuracy.

 Advanced Hybrid Stabilizer.

 What Larry had just injected me with? It’s a reliable remedy every person like me uses to calm the...nerves. We’ll just call them that for now. It regulates the senses. It levels out our capacities and capabilities just above the average human’s ability. It’s an antidote that comes in competition with the one that harms us--the one that eliminates and discards of our natural potentiality.

 The injurious drug is one of the reasons I found myself in another one of these places for the second time around. It’s one of the main reasons why I’m escaping from a psychiatric ward yet again with the help of my partner, Larry, whose abilities are just as effective, but then again feared, as mines by the general public, and even ourselves if we don’t regulate it.

 We’re hybrids on the run.

 “Lift your feet.”

 I obeyed without ridicule when I felt his hair brush my earlobe. The rolling of the wheelchair tires as we soared down the hall towards the first turn followed the command.

 “Tell me if you hear anything.” He panted against my sensitive ears making a sharp left and catching the both of us with his right foot.

 Nudging his face with mine, I kept my eyes on what was in front of us. We were meeting the general elevator area. “I haven’t taken it in a while. I’m shaky.” I pressed my lips together. “Go down that hall.”

 “How do you think you’re gonna get used to the enhancements again if you don’t exercise it?” He stated. I thinned my lips giving up my argument since he had more than a point. “We have to take the elevator.”

 “There’s a hidden one right near the staircase in the back. Go.”

 Huffing against my ear, he listened, backing away from the main elevators and moving steadily down the dark hall. “Dilater. (Dilate.)” He hastily whispered, the sound still booming against my eardrum. He instantly noticed. “Sorry.”

 I nodded and focused on the darkness. I exhaled as my eyes adjusted to the dim lighting.

 “You remember how to do it?”

 “So, so.”

 “Focus on one place for a few seconds. How many did Roy tell you?”

 “40.” I remembered, squinting my eyes so that my pupils zoomed in on a random tile a few feet away from the staircase.

 Larry’s chuckle brushed against my cheek. “We don’t have time for 40. Do 15.”

 1, 2, 3...4, 5, 6, 7...8, 9…

 “Good?” He questioned slowing down some. I nodded and watched as everything around my tile turned a deep green, allowing me to see my surroundings better.

 “Yeah…” I trailed off. “Someone’s coming up the stairs. Pull into that abandoned room to the right.” I peeped.

 I could feel his smile against my neck, which instantly told me he'd probably known the moment the person had opened the first floor stairwell door—way before me. I sighed as he pushed me up and pulled into the emptied room before shutting the door gently. When the lock clicked he smiled my way. “You always adapt to things so fast. I forgot how easily you take to them. Especially control.” He whispered, looking out the tiny window in the door.

 I just sat there in silence watching his tall figure unnecessarily tiptoe to see through the small view. He could cover it with his hand if he wanted to.

 “All clear?” I finally whispered.

 He nodded. “Where’s the exit?”

 I kept quiet as he cautiously opened the door and pushed me out with a foot to the back of my seat. Once I was in the hall, he grabbed the bars behind me and turned into the lit area across from the stairs.

 “Where’s the exit, Ce?” He questioned again.

 “Make a left.” He curved the corner as asked and then stopped short.

 While he pressed the button for the elevator, I closed my eyes and rested my head on the elastic just at the nape of my neck. It instantly produced goosebumps on my skin, making me pop up. Sensitivity. So much fucking sensitivity.

 It’ll wear off.

 I heard Larry’s voice in my subconscious causing me to nod. I’d forgotten about how easy it was for him to effortlessly, and literally, slither his way into my thoughts. That came with two advanced hybrids having a good connection. I tried to lay my head onto the band again, but this time I let my hair hit it first before my skin came in contact. Larry reached down and began to massage my temples so that the hesitant feeling would soothe into nothing.

 “I can’t hear anything if-”

 “I got you.” He reassured, placing his thumbs on the sides of my neck and softly pressing on the spot. I gasped, non-verbally thanking him as he began the poke-rotation cycle he used to always provide me with when I was too worked up to fully control my nerves in the past.

 “Larry, we could die in this exact moment…” I breathed, pulling my lip into my mouth.

 I heard his tiresome sigh. “When can’t we?” He chuckled. “Be quiet and enjoy it. You’ve been through a lot.”

 The ding of the elevator took away our humbling moment...and his hands causing me to sigh.

 “You still haven’t answered my question, Larry.”

 “Shoot.”

 “Your medicine. You haven’t taken it.” I could hear the conversation below us already. There were two men and one woman waiting at the bottom floor. “We’ve got company.” I added.

 He nodded. “Don’t worry about it. I souped them up already.”

 “Is your dose wearing off?”

 “Non.” He appeased, shrugging. “You’re right. I didn’t take it.”

 “Why?”

 The sudden halt of the elevator shut us up and initiated our applied roles-Larry being the nurse taking me to the calm room and me being the crazy, deranged woman, subdued by drugs.

 With telepathy, I could give Larry all the direction he needed with just a thought. Our outside appearance had been twisted from our internal with a full 180 spin and before we knew it, we’d hit the corner where the emergency exit leads to the darkness of an alleyway. I took the job of keeping an eye out, or more like an ear, while Larry unstrapped me and passed me a black shirt, he’d probably randomly picked up before he left the base.

 “Push gently.” I warned.

 “Close gently.” He cautioned back.

 I nodded, turning towards the main desk and leaning against the wall adjacent the door.

 “Go.” I signaled, hearing the click of the bar and pivoting to slip through the tiny crack behind him. No alarm went off. No one screamed for security. No one grabbed any arms and there was no banter or sounds of panic. There was just the pater of my naked feet running down the concrete alleyway towards the main street.

 We’d made it out once again without any reversed plans or tedious hold ups. Feeling the fresh air on my skin had to be the most amazing refreshment to my surface that night other than Larry’s relieving sighs mixed with the sound of blaring horns and noisy conversations on the lively streets. My senses were working together again after being confined for a good 3 three weeks in a hellhole of silence, torture, and loneliness. I felt lightheaded but it was better than the painful headache I’d been experiencing hours ago due to a thousand screams of help resting on my conscience. I was freshly free and I could feel myself becoming one with something I’d been hidden from all my life.

 Civilization.

 That doesn’t mean I wasn’t content. The bittersweet feeling is more of a joyous one than anything.

 If joyous wasn’t the word than I would take tolerable.

 We ran a good six or seven blocks, our legs burning and our throats smoldering with the mix of our own spit. I could literally feel the blisters on my feet forming. One on my big toe, another on the middle of my right foot and one more near the tiny bloody gash on my left heel. I could smell the blood mixed with the air and I could taste it once it made its way through my airways and hit my sensitive taste buds but I kept going, my arms pumping beside me. I could hear Larry’s heartbeat over the beating horns and the tiny yelps of women and children as we pushed them aside. It sounded like someone banging on a door over and over again while mine beat five times his rate.

 Where are we going?

 I shut my eyes so I could focus on his thoughts and my hopes that he wouldn’t ignore me. Thank God he answered almost immediately after.

 When you see me cross the street, cross the street. Don’t question. Don’t stop.

 I huffed and pumped my arms, giving my legs some motivation to stay on his ass. As we neared the end of the street, I looked his way noticing the slight pivot of his body. He was about to hit the corner.

 Slowing down a bit, I got behind him and followed as he moved towards the edge of the sidewalk. As soon as he hit the curb, he twisted his body and sprinted across the busy two way, cars honking and people screaming for us to watch ourselves as we both probably begged our calves not to fail. I clenched my teeth feeling the nerves in them scream for a release as we hopped the concrete pavement and ran around the corner down a dark street. My eyes immediately dilated due to the adrenaline surging through my veins as we approached the middle of the darkened block and with one blink I could see everything.

 There’s a car waiting for us at the end of this block. You get in on the sidewalk. I’ll go into the street.

 I nodded even though he couldn’t see me. Finally releasing my teeth from their tight clasp, I ran ahead of Larry, so that he didn’t have to stop for me to cross him at the finish of the block, and began to easily sprint to our destination.

 The moment my hand found the handle of the sleek black car, my pupils constricted and I hopped in without a word. My shoulder met Larry’s and in an instant we were hanging off of one another, our breaths pulling in and out of us in large intakes and choppy exhales. The ignition sounded and just like that we were headed the opposite way of the ward, our lungs resting in our stomachs.

 Larry began to chuckle first. Pushing my face into his shoulder, I shook my head, hearing a recognizable laugh of another come from the front. Peeking, I caught sight of his disheveled ‘fro even before he spoke.

 “Bienvenue à civilsation, mon Cera. (Welcome to civilization, my Cera.)” He dragged, giving me his dark eyes through the rearview mirror of the Escalade.

 I halfheartedly smiled, scooting over to place my back in the corner of my seat. “Merci beaucoup, Laurent. (Thank you very much, Laurent.)”

 -

Hybrids.

 Definition: the offspring of two plants or animals of different species or varieties

 Origin: Latin

 Derived from the Latin word, hybrida, which was developed during the early 17th century due to the reference of the offspring of a freeman and a slave. Also, the offspring of a tame soar and a wild boar.

 In the modernized view, it’s basically the cross between two species therefore creating a mixed character, composed of mixed elements.

 This is us--Larry and I, Laurent, and, so many more.

 We’re a mixed species that are better known as ELIES but not by the general public and not even by ourselves.

 We call ourselves AH(s): Advanced Hybrids. We view ourselves as complex humans with a hint of misunderstood attributes thrown in our bloodline, while the government sees us as nothing but harmful to society. Typical human thinking. That explains their codename for our kind.

 ELIES: Abbreviation for Elimination of (ELI) Extraterrestrial (E) Species (S).

 Yeah, the cat’s out the bag. Those so-called attributes are Area 51’s containment supposedly.

 We’re human with a dash of alien mixed in our veins that enables us to have enhanced abilities both mentally and...emotionally. Our senses are magnified 10 times the average human’s sensibilities and our intellect skyrockets compared to your general genius.

 That myth of humans using only 10 percent of their brain? Pure bullshit. Humans use the entirely of the brain, but for different functions of the body. Hybrids minds work in a way where the mental and emotional aspect of the organ have been heightened to another level, therefore giving us an unknown “power” of advantage. Our bloodline is one that depends on the senses and analytical contributions of the brain more. This coming naturally to us, we naturally exercise it, giving you the development of an advanced hybrid.

 The government knows of our existence from birth. We literally come into the world as pawns in their game of elimination elies. When conceived we’re tagged with the color crimson, the same color of the highlights in our hair that every AH possesses, on our tiny hospital bands. To cover up any suspicions, the highlights are blamed on previous medicine intake or some other bullshit blame so that questions won’t be asked. Parents don’t complain and the offspring are taken to the nursery where the process of elimination starts.

 At a young age, hybrids are diagnosed with some type of disease or condition that requires the intense consumption of medicine: diseases of the nervous system and digestive system, respiratory conditions like asthma, or even conditions such as narcolepsy or any other head trauma related state. As long as the problem can resort to prescribed drugs, it can be written on a medical report and handed to a specialist without question or ridicule. By the age of 2, hybrids are hooked, constantly taking the daily two-a-day pills or inhaling the mist of that asthma pump their mother has advised for them to carry everywhere they go or even getting those injections the doctor recommended for them twice a month. It’s a cycle that falls in place that seems normal to everyone, even the hybrid, but in actuality it’s slowly but surely pulling the alien residue from their blood. With each dose, their powers are being eaten away by a gassy or liquid parasite and they have no idea, despite the feelings of abnormality that are usually ignored.

 Their enhanced abilities are commonly about gone by the age of 15 or 16, which is usually the age an aware hybrid develops. An aware hybrid is simply a hybrid that’s conscious of their capabilities such as, the voices in their heads and the fact that they can configure the answer to a problem faster and more accurately than most start to make sense. They notice they’re different from everyone else, but they also start to feel lonely and outcast.

 Advanced hybrids still feel everything the natural human feels. We just feel it more intensely. We go through everything from terrible twos to puberty to menopause. We’re humans but more sensitive and pinpoint.

 So, as a hybrid becomes more aware, they either stop taking the given medicine, due to the fact that it makes them feel unnatural, or they keep taking. To continue consumption, you’re providing yourself a life of normalcy, but also giving away the one thing that makes you different and superior in ability. For some AHs, this leads to depression and withdrawal, and for others satisfaction and relief. A bit unfortunate in my eyes, but to each their own. On the other hand, the hybrids that discontinue their intake end up in harm’s way, but also in a prideful place. They own their title as a mutant and are rewarded with judgment from the government and a life of running and hiding...if they get that far.

 Once the government learns of an aware hybrid’s disobedience, they initiate plan B. Plan B being diagnosing us with life-threatening conditions that leave us bed-bound and confined from the general public. Cancer, AIDs, ALS, even something as straight and narrow as a coma. While in the hospital, they plant the sickness in our bodies so the false accusation becomes a real problem. They also send us to psychiatric wards, the fate of Larry and I, with the medical reports saying we’re crazy, deranged, or offhand, therefore not able to take care of ourselves. It’s like spitting on our mental capacity and calling us inferior because we’re...well, superior.

 The government manipulates us with our own citizenship, our health care, and our right to be protected to basically restrain us and, most importantly, wipe us out. To dry out the strange beings we are because our species is such harm to normal society. We only want to survive like every other living thing but Homo sapiens love complications. They love to be in control of everyone and everything even if the situation or persons are impossible to attain any authority over.

 That leaves people like Larry, Laurent & I. The ELIE rebellions, as they like to call us, that fail to see the light of losing what’s rightfully ours. We fight back. We show them how much authority they actually have and totally reverse the ongoing process of extermination of our kind. We promote and protest against them. Travel the country and save the hybrids that still stand for our cause of deserving a place in these ill nations. Yes, nations. It’s not only the United States. We’re everywhere--parts of North America, European and South America. We’re located in small parts of Africa, Asia, and some of Australia.

 We range from regular everyday people to known celebrities. We come in hundreds and expand quickly, but every single one of us is watched as soon as the first crack of a cry leaves our vocal chords. We’re the enemies and the unwanted, but also the hidden and the misunderstood.

 This calls for protection that we definitely provide thanks to a bright idea from a man of many minds and a thirst for freedom. Ray Gueye. He is the man that’s responsible for the extant of an advanced hybrid society and my pride in my kind. And, to be honest, every hybrid’s dignity.

 He’s the reason Larry and I have stuck together and why we’re with one another now. He gave me a partner and a family to back it up. My possession of protection, family, and progressing growth are all the doings of Ray Gueye.

 “What?” My question wasn’t followed by a dry scowl or a twist of the lips but the total opposite—a warm smirk.

 I wasn’t in the slightest surprised when Larry returned it, the corners of his mouth curling into tiny circles. It reminded of the Joker but without the makeup: full and sly like I remembered. “Rien.” He shrugged, moving his warm palms over his covered thighs. I could almost feel the brush of his rough hands on the fabric. “I’m just happy to see you.” He finished, bluntly.

 My fingers tapped against the hard surface of the tiny table separating us. The small tray moved in rhythm with the engine directly under our feet, rumbling in faint booms. My fingertips channeled the sound and soon I was fully leaning against the pull out table so I could feel the vibrations rummage through my body. It excited my nerves, fully erasing any sign of extended feels my skin experienced. I was literally one with the engine, all of my senses trusting the sound, feel, and imaginary taste of it.

 “I didn't think you'd come for me." I acknowledged. "Ray doesn't like pop-up missions. They hold everyone back."

 "Ray didn't assign this particular mission." He sighed, pursing his lips into a hidden snarl. I mentally latched onto the responsive gesture, my eyes flashing over his clenching hands and then returning to his gaze. "I took it upon myself to come and get you."

 "So, no one knows you're gone?"

 He craned his neck, letting his head bob. The cracks that creased his seven joints tickled mine and soon my back was in my chair again. I could almost taste the synovial fluid surrounding the ligaments as he bent the cervical bones. It made my mouth tingle.

 "They know.” He said.  “They had no choice, but to let me come after you. I left before anyone could stop me.”

 Typical.

 No one seemed to know you were gone either." He raised a knowing brow before leaning on his knees. The black jean covering them carried excess dust. "It was like they were oblivious to your absence."

 "That's how this goes. We save who we can. We leave behind who we can't until further notice if there is one." My head pivoted in a tilt. I wasn't surprised his did the same. "Again, you have broken code, but I'm not surprised. You're not too fond of following rules anyway."

 His lips slithered into a faint smile that barely gave off any real joy. It was more overweening. His emotion levels felt like fiery stakes to my skin instead of the usual soft, pillow-like perceive as it mingled with the atmosphere. He knew it wouldn't pierce my prolonged demeanor explaining why he did it. Larry was one of the few people that actually knew me by street and landmark. He could draw my blueprint with his eyes closed. That wasn't scary in the slightest since I could promote the fact I could say the same for him. He was the only person I really felt safe around, courtesy of our history.

 "If I followed rules, you would still be in that cell. You would've frenzied and eventually you would've dehydrated or starved yourself to death."

 My lips thinned. "Protocol is protocol."

 An airy smirk ticked the corner of his mouth. The simple gesture seemed to renovate his whole face, but not for the better. It was just as arrogant as I remembered it.

 "You know protocol means nothing more than shit to me when it comes to you."

 "Maybe you should reevaluate your first priority then."

 He huffed wearily before shaking his head. "I wish I could, Ce. I really wish I could, but I'm not made like that and you're more than aware of the fact."

 "I'm aware of your medicine intake as well."

 "What medicine intake?" He smirked.

 "Exactly."

 I imagined his hair crawling with red dye as he leaned against his knees and propped his chin in his hands. The childish gesture made my head whirl with contentment.

 “Why aren’t you taking your medicine, Larry?”

 His emotional levels shot to the peak of frustration in an instant and I immediately knew I wouldn’t be obtaining the answers I was hoping for any time soon. He wanted to be difficult as always.

 “What?”

 “Listen.” I said. “There’s no medicine in your system at all. I can almost feel your adrenaline surging through your veins.”

 He shrugged. I pursed my lips as he voiced while barely gesturing to me with a hand, “I didn’t want to take it so,” He shrugged, casually. “I didn’t. I gave my dose to Ty. He needed it more than me. You know he can’t keep his ass in a seat for more than a millisecond and he frenzies off of pure energy so…” His lips screwed before his shoulders popped up again.

 I nodded. “So, if you frenzy, that’s not a problem?”

 “I won’t.” He said, unconcerned. I trailed my attention down his frame catching his reddened fingers that pulled on the sleek fabric of his armrests. The patting of his feet against the rhythm of the engine sounded like bangs against a hard wood door. As soon as he noticed my observant eye, he stopped all movement. I shot a look back to his glare hearing the grumble of his voice. “I’m fine. I’ve learned to control my frenzies. Besides, my trigger isn’t as sensitive as everyone else’s.”

 “Just because your trigger isn’t as popular or common as others does not mean it can’t set you off. Frenzies are frequent and random. They can happen in a blink of an eye or a snap of a finger. You have knowledge of that.”

 He held his hand up and waved me off. “I haven’t blacked out yet, right? Really...let’s look at the situation, Ce. I came and saved you, correct?” He asked, mockingly. I just stared at him mentally smacking him in the face. I could tell he was channeling my thoughts by the way a sly grin settled on his lips. “Yes. I saved you from the ward, got my brother to drive us out to the plane with no complications and successfully got us in the air. It won’t take us long to get to the station. All of that and no frenzies. Whatsoever.” He folded his hands in his lap and raised a brow. “I think I’m doing pretty good.”

 “Picture me jumping out of this plane."

 His face dropped and his expression went blank, giving no emotion. He didn’t need to. I could feel the transparent, panicked feeling almost radiating off his skin.

 I held his stare. “Someone shoots at this plane right now and our pilot...also your twin, Laurent head gets blown off right along with a blown engine, sending us plummeting to the ground at full speed.”

 “Don’t pull me into this!” Laurent yelled from the front, making me flick my eyes his way and then back to Larry’s twitching brows.

 I watched his cool crumble in front of me as I voiced his worst fear. The one thing that set him off.

 Larry's trigger–the loss of people he actually gives a damn about.

 The mental fatigue he was going through at the moment clutched onto my trigger making me twitch some, but since I wasn’t as sensitive and vulnerable as him, with AHS in my system, I was able to keep my composure. Larry on the other hand looked like he was about to explode.

 Throwing a limp hand his way, I continued, “You see how easy it is for me to alarm you? If I keep at it, I can send you over the edge with nothing but a few words. You need the antidote in your vein. It helps you remain stable.”

 He shook his head as his jaw clenched. His mouth began to twitch more and soon his fingers were seeping in the leather of the seat’s armrests. I furrowed my eyebrows.

 “How long hasn’t he been taking, Laurent?” I called, still watching the scene in front of me morph itself into the risk of disaster.

 “Since you get catch again.” He replied, his voice sounding a bit distracted. “He’s been doing pretty good, I think. If he stay off it and learn to control, I think he get it. He only react like this ‘cause he no see you in a while. His trigger more sensitive since he just get you back and you already talk about him lose you again.”

 “You encourage this?”

 “Yeah. He in panic only for you. Trust. I know. I know my brother.”

 I huffed, taking his argument for confirmation. If not anyone, Laurent knows Larry like the back of his hand. They're more in tune with each other than we are.

 “That enough, Cera.” I heard Laurent call from the front. “You push him far. He learn. Calm him now.”

 "He needs it." I said.

 "Cera."

 I eyed Larry’s convulsing frame once more in a lazed manner. He was literally on edge. The veins pulsed from his neck told me that much.

 "Cera, you being cruel."

 "He's being incompetent. Fear washes that away." The taste of blood pooled in the middle of my tongue telling me he was piercing the skin of his. I flared my nostrils in response. "He needs it."

 The sight and feel of his aggressive struggle crushed my chest into dust as I leaned back in my seat. My breathing levels escalated almost immediately and the cavity heaved with immense altitude and caved to the point my skin curled around my ribs.

 If he'd had AHS in his system he would've lasted a few hours rather than a few minutes. The agony would've only felt like a prick and he would still be in great condition without the thought of burgeoning worry creasing the crevices of his brain.

 I felt everything he felt, just on lower levels. His heavy breathing, his ache, his migraine, and the putrid smell that burned his nose hairs and seemed to taint the pecks on his skin. Everything stabbed at the most sensitive part of his conscious mind, which weakened the mental portion of it. The physical was only a mirage, but it felt realer than real. Like someone was melting your brain with heated metal in repetitive slow pokes and drags.

 I'd experienced everything he was feeling a thousand times over so I managed. My tactic might've seemed like a form of torture but it’s only a lesson to prevent him from fully hitting his peak. I needed him to be aware. To be scared of what was to come after his eyes flashed black and his limbs began to feel like a thousand bees were creating blood clots with their stingers and then resting their dying carcass against his festering flesh.

 That’s what a frenzy felt like. What he was feeling now was something close to nothing. I needed to get that through his head.

 "Fucking shit, C. You ruthless."

Laurent's panicked face appeared from the corner of my eye and I instantly growled at the sight.

 "Don't– Don't touch him."

 His glare shot my way as he hurriedly got behind his brother and began gently rubbing his temples. I snarled as Larry's tense shoulders dropped and his nails retreated from the flesh of his knees. Laurent's face disappeared behind his tresses and with every whisper the beating of Larry's pulsating heart eased into a steady rhythm.

 I huffed at the sight of his body calming itself to its regulated state and rose from my seat, leaning on to the counter adjacent me.

 “If a frenzy is you bring me to the fuck point.” Larry breathed, his speech almost incoherent. He sounded drained.

 I cringed as Laurent moved his hands into Larry's hair slowly massaging the parietal area of his skull. The parietal lobe rested right underneath, which controlled his ability to interpret language and words. The slow rotating of his fingers felt like pressure against my own skull and soon I was turning back to Larry's angry eyes. Laurent smiled softly and moved his fingers along his temporal area, which laid over his temporal lobe. That handled memory. The massaging commenced again and soon he was speaking in full, his bitter speech directed towards me.

 "You good, brother?"

 Laurent's question went ignored as Larry flared enlarged nostrils my way. I turned away from him.

 “If I frenzy it’s because you would bring me to the fucking point.” He repeated.

 "That's my goal." I started, reaching for the handle of the tiny fridge below me. "You need discipline. Without it you'll get yourself into something you'll never want to go back to. A frenzy shouldn't be something you risk going through."

 "So, you risk pushing me to it?"

 "I push you to the tip of the metaphorical cliff, but I don't kick you off." I turned to his snarled condition before grabbing a water bottle and kicking the miniature fridge closed with my foot. "It tends to work better than anything else. Pain brings fear and fear brings discipline."

 "You're hurting yourself to teach me a lesson. That's a maniac strategy. You could initiate a frenzy for yourself as well. It's dumb and risky."

 "Just like your choice of doing." I argued taking a swig of the water I'd pulled out and sitting across from him again. "I'm stronger than you and more experienced. I can handle my levels better. Pain is my best friend and worst enemy. That was nothing."

 To have a trigger so sensitive and dissatisfying is a gift and a curse, but only hybrids like me can properly understand the concept. We get to warn others like us of what they're capable of, firsthand, since we experience the peak of it so many times in our lives. Throughout my life span, I've frenzied several times and the previous was never any better than the current. It was just pain, reactive nerves, and more pain. My senses split their exceptionally safe scale and with my agony, they skyrocket through the roof.

 Every bone in your body literally feels as if they're breaking and then turning to dust. The leftover remains feels as if it's being sprinkled over your organs and burning the flesh into shriveled mess that drains into your veins that clot immediately. It's an ongoing process of self-torture that commences from the natural instinct of our alienated cells.

 It's a process that can go on for hours depending on how long someone hasn't had AHS in their system. The serum weakens the urge of the frenzies by calming our hyperactive nerves. It's like a volume for aliens. Believe it or not, our enemy made the base of it and we just extracted all the hazardous chemicals. Instead of totally wiping out our abilities, it weakens it temporarily. It doesn't mix our gene code or any other altering process—it's a safe escape.

 It's a bundle of advantages in a syringe with one lonely con—we're always low on production since our supplier isn't particularly on our side. Not saying we don't cultivate our own base and work from there, but the original is always better than the replica. If we create a replica, we have to run tests and that risks hybrids lives since the severity of the chemicals extracted are so harmful.

 The test dummies are usually collected at bases by random, but once within, the weak aren't taken but the disobedient instead--the threats to their own kind. Hybrids that encourage hybrid extremists against humans go first. They're too much of a risk to keep. We're not exactly unknown, but we're hidden and we like to keep a low profile on what consists of our DNA ladders.

 After the extremists come the mixed breeds like Larry who decide not to take their needed dose of medicine and become an ill threat to our society. The lack of AHS in their veins not only makes their trigger sensitive, but also the minds of people around them and they become fickle--human instinct. So those hybrids don't give off bad influence they're put up for testing.

 That wasn't Larry's fate. I couldn't have it be Larry's fate. Whether it was through frenzy or through testing, it just wasn't his route. He's better than that—more advanced. He's my partner.

 "Larry, you're going to take your dose. Not because it'll calm you or stabilize, but because I'm telling you to." I declared.

 He shook his head. "Ray wouldn't like you taking his place, Cerafine."

 "I don't care what Ray wouldn't like." I bit back. "Take this fucking AHS or I'm going to inject it myself. I'm your partner. I protect you. That's what I intend to do."

 "If you care so much, Cera, take it yourself. I'm not putting that in my bloodstream. I don't need it."

 My blood wasn't boiling, but I was rubbed wrong. I was used to Larry's rebuttal. It was his natural thing to debate and refute, but when it was for his own good, the fact that he didn't see the ill result of how things would turn out irked me. We'd been here a thousand times before and to have him not trust my judgment was not only irritating, but also disrespectful. He was being senseless and unskilled for the sake of authority.

 "I need you alive." I declared. "I need you here...with me, on this earth and fully functioning. Fully aware. The only way that'll happen is if that medicine is in your vein."

 "It's not true."

 "Larry–"

 "Ce, I can control myself." He leaned forward in his seat to gain my full attention. His thoughts were turned off and I instantly took that as a call for my ears to be open. "I can control myself because you're here with me. And, you're safe and in one piece. You're not dead and that's all that matters."

 My throat tightened.

 "As long as you're in my sight and breathing, I won't frenzy. I...I needed to know you were okay." His voice wasn't small, but confident and telling. "I needed to know you were still existing." He slowly blinked at me. "As long as you are, I'm stabilized."

 I eyed his serious expression as he served me his rebuttal and that's when I noticed this wasn't a debate for him. This mission hadn't been for only my sake, but for his. Larry's well being was being weighed on mine—my crash-and-burn was his.

 My barreled sigh wasn't in response to his words, but how familiar they were to me. How many times I'd heard him plead and try to justify his case—his draw to me. My safety was his medicine. Yes, I knew that, but that didn't give him the right to not consume the serum.

 My life isn't one that's guaranteed. It's one that's threatened by a system and menaced by the ill thoughts of its owner. I'm a ticking time bomb that implodes in parted periods that are as profuse as seasonal change.

 Larry's safety shouldn't be reliant on anything vaguely promised like my own, because I'm not a set in stone welfare warranty. I'm a double death trap waiting to happen. He needs an outlet that'll piece him back together if I fall apart from the excess burden.

 "I'm not going back and forth with you about this."

 "Then, leave it alone. Let’s agree to disagree."

 I took a swig of my water before closing it and chucking it his way. He caught it swiftly and untwisted the cap.

 "That'll leave you dead." I said, getting up from my seat.

 The crinkle of the water bottle came prior to his response. "Then, I guess I'm dead."

 I hate his words more than his choices.

 "You're being senseless."

 "What can I say?" He shrugged before spiking the water bottle back my way. "It's in my blood."