acupofsolacemoved

[acupofsolacemoved]

Dear writers on AO3: "No archive warnings apply" is for your fluff, soft character, chill smut or story fics. It's for when there's nothing big/triggering and none of the major archive warnings show up in your story.

"Creator chose not to use archive warnings" is THE EXACT OPPOSITE. It is a Massive "enter at your own risk" sign indicating one or more of the major archive warnings or other nasty/gnarly/triggering tags may apply but would be a major spoiler to tag (e.g. horror/thriller fics where one of the major characters is killed). PLEASE don't use this tag if you mean "no archive warnings apply," they're not the same thing.

Sincerely, someone who just saw four T-rated fluff fics in a row tagged "creator chose not to use archive warnings" and had a minor heart attack.

[acupofsolacemoved]

”Men think about the Roman Empire” “What’s the female version of the Roman Empire” SHUT UPPPPP. SHUT THE FUCK UPPPPPP. AS A WOMAN I LOVE THE ROMAN EMPIRE. AS A WOMAN I LOVE ANCIENT HISTORY AND BATTLES AND POLITICAL INSTABILITY. THE “GIRL VERSION OF THE ROMAN EMPIRE” IS THE ROMAN EMPIRE. IM GOING TO STAB YOU 23 TIMES

[acupofsolacemoved]

Archive Downtime

The Archive will be down for 90 minutes of maintenance at 16:45 UTC Wednesday Jan. 24 (24 hours from now)! Check what time that is for you: https://bit.ly/47MIjdl

[acupofsolacemoved]

tumblr meme literacy census 2023

context: I've been documenting tumblr memes since last January month by month to the best of my ability (bouncing off of this post), and I'm curious as to how well known they are.

here's my data:

counting the repeated one once (my dealer: got some straight gas), there are 40 memes total.

edit: i messed up the numbers, the "about half" option should say 20 - 24, not 16 - 20.

would appreciate reblogs for a larger reach!

[acupofsolacemoved]

remaking this poll bc i saw one like it that had limited options and was also ended… hopefully i’ve covered all the bases

[acupofsolacemoved]

if a post makes you feel guilty/frenzied/furious and provides no actionable steps, don’t reblog it.

[acupofsolacemoved]

I bring you… my silly little comics. Saw a tik tok this morning about British Museum recognizing emperor Elagabalus as a trans woman 🏳️‍⚧️, and I just had to draw this.

[acupofsolacemoved]

AITA For Not Tagging a Work?

I, 32F, write primarily for my own enjoyment, my main platform being AO3. I currently have a multi-chaoter series that includes several major plot twists, including one that includes non-con. To avoid spoiling it, because I believe my stories deserve to be read with as little background info as possible, I only tag it as "Creator CHOSE not to Include Archive Warnings". Which is, as I hope is obvious, is not synonymous with "There Are No Warnings". The point is, I don't use the Rape/Non-con tag. Recently, I got a very upset reader in my comments complaining about how triggering that chapter of my work is, and that's where I have a problem. I believe the corporate obsession content warnings pervading even fanworks to be a major problem. I don't want to sanitize my work, but I do get that they contain pretty heavy themes. But I feel like I seriously do give my stories a disservice by adding labels on them, and maybe I am the asshole for this, but I value my pride and joy (my work) over strangers online. AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[acupofsolacemoved]

"he would not fucking say that" but you ever be looking at fanart and suddenly its "he would not fucking have abs"

[acupofsolacemoved]

i’m gay but i’m always gonna choose the well developed straight ship over the 2 bland and incompatible white dudes that have 500,000 fanfics written about them. you guys just hate women.

[acupofsolacemoved]

Happy Birthday Ron Weasley 👑 (our king!)

[acupofsolacemoved]

free conversation ender for people who continue to willfully misunderstand source material and start inane arguments about it

[acupofsolacemoved]

tumblr has such a weird site culture people are downright hysterical about staff. i still go insane every time i see someone frame the porn bad as tumblr simply deciding they hated money and success and not as tumblr inevitably caving to the pressure that apple and payment processors put on nearly any website that allows sexual content. like it was bad thing that happened and you can be mad about it but why rewrite history and act like tumblr staff just sat up one day and were like 'lets torpedo our site traffic'

[acupofsolacemoved]

I know I've said it before but tiktok style word censorship makes me want to puke

[acupofsolacemoved]

guess what i watched on new years (a redraw kind of)

[acupofsolacemoved]

Reminder, everyone, that queerness is not a personality trait. It can be an essential part of your identity and representation fucking matters, but your personality does NOT define your gender or sexuality.

The point of this post is not to call anyone out in particular for perpetuating harmful stereotypes about queerness/gender, but to ask people to be more reflective about why we tend to base our understanding of queerness in particular around stereotypical ideas of femininity and masculinity. Hypermasculinity harms all of us. If you are a trans woman, there is no RIGHT/CORRECT way to be a woman. If you are a trans man, you should NOT feel like you are less of a man because you embrace qualities our heteronormative society deems “feminine.” Obviously, right? Well, if you were to observe fandom and shipping dynamics, these values become…murky.

I say this out of the kindness of my heart and with all the love in the world, but folks gotta be more careful when they say, “I can’t believe people think THIS character is straight!!!!” with 100% sincerity particularly regarding a narrative where the author very obviously did not intend to make characters gay. (You’re excused if you say it because you’re just passionate and having a good time and I respect you for that.)

I am bothered by these statements because…upon what exactly are you basing this argument? The problem is, because the author (derogatory) did not intend for people to interpret particular characters as gay/queer, there is a strong likelihood this statement is based on stereotypical ideas of what queerness looks like. “He is dramatic/emotional” is…uh…not a good reason to think someone is gay. A man with stereotypical feminine qualities does not necessarily mean they are gay. A woman with traits associated with hypermasculinity does not necessarily mean they are gay.

Do I think Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks are gay? YES. Do I think Tonks could probably be gender fluid? Yes! Do I adamantly believe that Sirius is a bisexual semi-aro superstar? Also very much Yes. So it’s not like I don’t have opinions or feelings about this. However, there is SO MUCH HARM in believing that men who embrace softness, beauty, and vulnerability MUST be queer. Okay, you say. But in MY mlm ship, one guy is SUPER DUPER masculine and the other one is feminine. Right. That’s part of my point. Hypermasculinity is so pervasive even in queer spaces that ships are often reduced to “this is the top/masculine person in the relationship, and this is the bottom/feminine person.” So…uhhhh…what does this sound like?

Yesterday, I had a conversation with my students (teenagers) to explain why “she wears the pants in the relationship” is an extremely harmful idea. I asked them, “Okay, so what does that mean when you say that?” Students responded that it meant that the woman was the “boss” in her heterosexual relationship—that she was the controlling one.

“So when you say ‘she wears THE pants,’ are you suggesting that one person wears the ‘traditionally masculine’ article of clothing and the other should wear the traditionally ‘feminine’ article of clothing?” I prompted. They could see where I was going with this. So I went on, “Think about what we’re insinuating here. We’re saying that men are leaders—or at least, they SHOULD be. Masculinity is being a leader, and femininity is being a follower. Making a snide remark that ‘she wears the pants’ suggests that she is NOT assuming proper gender roles and it might strike some of us as funny. But do we see the problem with this? What does that sound like to you? And for that matter, should ANY partnership be so unbalanced that ONE person controls it?”

Kids were shaking their heads, but one student was really troubled by this. “But in every relationship, there’s got to be the person in charge and the person who is just…” He didn’t really finish the sentence. I’m pleased to say that most of my students immediately recognized the glaring issue with this. Most of the class shot this kiddo very horrified looks, and he was so shocked that people weren’t on his side (goodhearted kid, but clearly some messed up gender roles going on at his house). I let them discuss a bit more and finished with, “Be reflective in your relationships, friends. Dynamics like this can sometimes point to power imbalances—and generally, people shouldn’t feel inferior in their partnerships.”

Fandom is SO LIKE THIS. We equate personality with sexuality and gender so hard!!!! We try to inject hypermasculinity into queer spaces SO HARD. At some point, your desire to be ‘subversive’ just turns into toxic heteronormativity. When you make Remus hypermasculine and Sirius hyperfeminine because it “just feels right” - consider WHY this feels right to you when there really is not a lot in canon that points to these things. Why does it feel right to you that one person should “be a top” and one should “be a bottom”? This is not to say this is ILLEGAL or you shouldn’t make Sirius feminine—it’s just…think about the underlying message here when it’s in contrast to very very masculine Remus.

My point here is NOT “stop making characters gay/feminine!!!” My point is, hell yeah, the characters who are canonically straight could be gay, but also I really recommend avoiding basing this on stereotypes. “I can’t believe people think this overly dramatic/emotional/fashionable/soft man is straight!” Unpack that. Really think about it. What are you really saying? Just…be reflective, folks. You are not immune to the heteronormative agenda.

TL;DR // softness, aggressiveness, beauty, love, gentleness, competitiveness, etc. belong to everyone, every gender, every sexuality.