arachnixe

[arachnixe]

thanks tumblr for taking down my piece about censorship! heres a more censored version. i think its an improvement, really

(hey. you can still see it uncensored on bluesky.)

[arachnixe]

perks

the perks of your job include all the free snacks and Red Bull you can handle, gym membership, parking, and the stress relief doll chained up under your desk.

unfortunately, you don't work here any more, effective immediately. "position no longer exists" blah blah blah. put your stuff in this cardboard box. too bad. the job was… well, it was bullshit, really. but you'll miss the caffeine and that hot little mouth. really did some of your best work at that desk.

you sigh. you put your stuff in the cardboard box. you let security escort you to the parking lot. you drive home. you take some of your stuff out of the cardboard box. you put it on your already cluttered desk. you leave the rest in the box in the hallway.

middle of next week, you're moping over a personal project that is stubbornly not molding itself into the Next Big Thing. doorbell. two guys in brown uniforms. big cardboard box. "sign here, thanks. have a good one." the hell is this? it's really heavy.

you slice thru tape and packing straps and open it. it's the doll. haphazardly folded for transport, legs behind its head, company skirt flopped down over its torso and not covering its holes, polystyrene pellets in its long hair.

sticky note on its chest, neat looping handwriting you recognize from Steph in Talent Ops:

"hey asshole. hope you're doing okay because you left me with a mess. these things aren't supposed to care who's inside them, but it bit right thru the guy we put at your desk after the layoff. Services says we can't use it any more. your problem now. p.s.: don't worry about the shipping, i took it out of your last paycheck."

you brush hair out of its face. it stares back at you. you notice dried and flaking brown at the corner of its mouth. you tilt its unprotesting head, confirm what you suspect. the stuff is all down its chin. shipped to you as is.

the worst part is, you can already feel the excitement at the thought of chaining it up under your own desk. obviously, you have to clean it first, but you know what inevitably follows. your pajama pants are coming off and you're going to put yourself against that tongue. those lips. those teeth.

you're better than that guy. right? right.

it's nice to know something believes in you. □

[arachnixe]

The Sincerest Prayer

[arachnixe]

thinking about them. explodes

[arachnixe]

you can arrive at being unconditionally pro-piracy in a lot of ways, but you can only really stay conditionally anti-piracy if you don't speak with anyone outside of the western copyright bloc

[arachnixe]

Individuals infringing on the copyrights of companies is a good thing, and I will die on this hill.

Fuck IP.

an underrated part of the Flash Game era was the sheer amount of copyright infringement going on. you could straight up have mario murder koopas with a shotgun and nobody would stop you. nowadays if you make a fangame perfectly in compliance with their brand standards Nintendo will send a deep web hitman after you

[arachnixe]

Maid: "My lady?"

Princess [half asleep]: "whuzzah?

Maid: "My lady, we require your assistance"

[Princess cracks her eyes open, her maid and her lady night are standing awkwardly in her bedchamber. Both look like they have hastily dressed. The maid's makeup is smeared. The knight is wearing... a dog collar??]

Princess: "Oh goddess, have mercy... what is it now?"

Maid: "Well... we... we were um..."

Knight: "We were making love, your grace."

Maid [blushing furiously]: "Trying to make love, but um... we both... well... acts of service..."

Knight: "We're both subs... your grace"

[Princess groans and lays her head back down. What part of her thought setting the two of them up was a good idea?]

Maid: "we need..."

Knight: "that is to say, we require-"

Princess: "You need a dom in the room to direct the scene."

[Maid and knight nod, both of them blushing now]

Princess: "Okay, fine. Whatever. Fetch a chair for me. Make sure it's comfortable."

[arachnixe]

I think when you correctly identify a trauma that is the base of a woe of yours it should just disappear. It should be like "aaahh. you got me" and vanish and leave 100 dollars behind

[arachnixe]

"why does this nonsexual power dynamic sound so sexual" i have some news for you about the dominant social relationship between sex and power

[arachnixe]

inventing a revolutionary new kind of leftist infighting where you hatefuck about your political differences, only i'm not allowed to call it 'revolutionary' because she says that revolution is pointless and unrealistic

[arachnixe]

If you looked at my posts from five years ago, you'd not recognize me as the same person either.

You know cybersmiths a different guy. Cause in the ancient times that motherfucker was not on about the power of the stars or getting feminized, other than the occasional mention of his fetishes it was 1000 posts a day about, like, the Iraq war

[arachnixe]

literally all ive been able to think about for the past few days is doll hivemind

[arachnixe]

[arachnixe]

Don't resist, just let the spider have you to itself~

[arachnixe]

[Staggers to the office coffee machine and starts fumbling my way through pouring a cup]

Huh? Oh... so last night, the semi-feral werewolf that my wife and I adopted climbed into bed with us and started spooning me... which is fine. I love her. She did nothing wrong... but it was 4:30 in the morning and I couldn't fall back asleep before the alarm went off.

[arachnixe]

Day 24093 This is my house. I won’t allow anyone to harm it. There should have been no more intruders after the last one. I do not want these people here. They will leave-

Day 24095 They are siblings. They are loud. Always singing and talking and stomping. As if they must be louder than anything else.

Day 24106 There are bolts on the door now. Bolts and hideous, gaudy new locks. How dare they-

Night 24112 I was going to fill the night with terrors. But he woke up screaming before I began. She came running from the other room. They sleep right across the hall from each other, with the doors on a crack. …they are young, are they not, to be living on their own. Was I ever so young?

Day 24129 She has fixed the squeak in the door at the top of the stairs. It never squeaked when I still lived.

Day 24121 The noise of the doorbell scares them. But they get so many deliveries. It is a good bell. It has worked all these years- I can see one of the men coming now with his packages, trudging up to the door. …perhaps if I knock before he is here, they will come and look before he can sound the bell.

Day 24114 He is planting flowers in boxes on my windowsills. I always wished I could have some flowers.

Night 24137 She is afraid of the dark. I could see it in her eyes when she got out of bed. …I lit the lamps for her.

Day 24142 They have moved the couch to the sun spot a little to the right of the window. That is where I used to have my armchair. It is the only sensible place for it.

Day 24163 Sometimes the noises of the world are suddenly too much for him. He winces and tries not to sway his head. This is my house. …I can keep it calm and quiet for a while.

Day 24178 She just got a phone call and now they are both laughing. Laughter is a good sound, isn’t it. They said this house has been good luck…

Night 24205 They are singing in our kitchen. He found my cookbook in the gap at the back of the kitchen cabinet and now they are trying to cook. They wanted to start with the soufflé. They don’t even know how to make béchamel! I turned the page to the casserole instead.

Day 24236 This is my house. These are my boarders. I won’t allow anyone to harm them.

[arachnixe]

Yeah. The spiders one is from a particular choice at the end of Memories of Mozart, and the mind-melding fungi comes from My Kingdom For a Pig and requires two specific choices during the story.

Fallen London is the only game I've played that gave me the option to make my character both a Spiders Hivemind and a Fungal Hivemind at the same time.

Frankly, I now realize that I have been grading my experiences in all other video games on a curve, and they'd better figure out how to catch up.