e4tyou4l1ve

[e4tyou4l1ve]

werewolf who needs you. please don’t leave her. please don’t leave. she doesn’t want to be alone again. please

[e4tyou4l1ve]

girl with top surgery scars for age regression reasons. being flat is gender confirming because her gender is "little girl." is that anything.

[e4tyou4l1ve]

it keeps looking at me. what is it?

not a human. definitely not. far from it.

test dummy. ragdoll. stress ball. toy.

evil child. lock it up before it infects the others.

revolts me to even look at it.

since it looks nonhuman, we’ll treat it like one

ethics aren’t important right now. it needs this.

X. that is what we’ll call it. it doesn’t need a name.

[e4tyou4l1ve]

i’ve been trying to get help with this specific issue, but most of my recent requests have been met with silence. so now i have to make a post about it.

am i allowed to include myself in the trans community?

i want to transition into a more neutral body. i don’t want genitals. i want as small as a chest as possible without removing my breasts entirely. but i still want to be a woman.

but most of my documents already refer to me as a woman. i used to say that i have an F on my birth certificate, but i now realize that i can’t even say that because i’ve never seen my birth certificate. i have no idea what i am.

my parents always forced me into a more feminine way of things, over emphasizing how much of a girl i was, especially when around others. i think they were tired of people not believing them when i said i was a girl.

peers forced me into more masculine roles, some even insisting that i was secretly a boy. i hated both of these things. i just wanted to be myself. and i still do.

but i’m still a girl. and people saw me as a girl when i was growing up. so by definition i can’t be trans, right? genuine question. it’s all about being something other than the gender you were assigned at birth. and i was assigned female by a doctor. violently. via them cutting me up and ruining my genitals. i was assigned female. brutally. by being reminded of how much of a girl i was while someone was molesting me.

i like the word transneutral for myself. but i don’t want to be transphobic, especially considering how pretty much all of my closest friends are trans (actually trans, not whatever the hell i have going on. if you can even call me trans in the first place).

i’ve asked trans people online if i could consider myself trans and they said yes. but that was only three people. i’d like more opinions on what words might help me feel more seen. because i’ve been feeling rather lonely lately

[e4tyou4l1ve]

hiiiiii intersex anon who likes radiohead but not havng sex with women despite being attracted to them, back at it again with her bullshit

am i. allowed to call myself transneutral if people already see me as being androgynous? apparently, when people see me, they don’t see me as being any gender. but i also really wanna get rid of my genitals and reduce the size of my breasts as much as possible without removing them entirely. i feel like the term transneutral suits me, but at the same tjme i lowkey feel like im stealing from trans people by using it

also, i dont even know if trans is the right word for me. my birth certificate says F and i see myself as a woman so by definition i cant be trans. even if the word feels right. i like calling myself a transneutral ispogender woman, but that would probably get me in trouble.

also how tf am i supposed to enjoy dating when literally everything is working against me. i feel like every dating guide for intersex people is just “just be yourself and the right person will come along!! it’s not hard, you’ll be fine!!” besides who would even find someone without genitals hot. literally what can you do at that point.

anyways i kinda derailed my own ask, aorry. main thing is; am i allowed to call myself transneutral if im only changing my body and not my gender and (if you can even help me, if not, i totally get it) how tf would i go about being in a relationship. im definitely not mentally stable enough rn for one but some notes for later might help me feel more prepared

you can just be trans.