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Trauma is weird. Trauma makes you fit symptoms. Some disorders are traumagenic in nature. Trauma isn't just he has PTSD she has BPD she has HPD he has CPTSD.

Trauma causes disorders, and commonly so. You can't slap some label on a person and call it a day when they have more symptoms than what the disorders includes.

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I absolutely hate being bored. especially since I become more sadistic. it sucks. like if I don't have anything stimulating I'll just imagine something edgy. like I'm an edgelord lol

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AsPD splitting and AvPD splitting... Oh how I wish they both would die

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Not feeling heard, feeling invalidated, questioning if I truly have asd

To note: I am NOT diagnosed, nor have been evaluated yet for ASD. I suspect I have it, and suspect I am LSN, Level 1, High functioning

cw/tw: fakeclaiming, ableism

I originally reached out for an evaluation for a diagnosis, however I was instead given an evaluation for special ed./IEP. No one told me this, and I was mistaken and thought it would be for a diagnosis.

Anyway, regardless the meeting ending up being extremely invalidating because they thought I was actively skewing the results in order to be 'better fit for the evaluation.' I made eye contact for a little bit, and apparently when I stated I couldn't handle eye contact, I stopped making eye contact (I had a meeting over zoom with a psychologist who said this). They also said this for when I was rocking back and forward but stopped when I started talking to someone.

Then they decided that since they couldn't put the blame on those two things enough, they started stating it was just my trauma causing me this symptoms. While that may true, these symptoms wouldn't be actively still rampant and prominent despite my hardwork in therapy and being open in therapy.

Then one of them went on a tangent how me actively 'seeking out' a diagnosis and what 'I'm doing' isn't going on the right track. In regards to getting treatment. Felt so invalidating. Like they thought I was putting up a facade. It was a whole thing about how, 'statistically isn't possible for me to have all these disorders.'

I ended up breaking down from what they were saying, and it was just a bunch of adults saying they understand my struggle. I feel like they don't and want to push it off as 'normal'. Maybe I'll understand when I'm older I guess, but for now I don't. During the break down I started hurting myself because I struggle with handling my emotions when I break down, and they didn't so anything. They didn't check up on me when I went to take a break, nor were empathetic towards me.

I'm having every non-doctor (parents, special ed. teachers) say I'm not autistic. Even my general practitioner, who've I've only seen twice, said I didn't seem autistic since I'm, 'functioning enough.'

I'm really struggling right now because I've not only documented my symptoms for years now, but have been struggling so hard. From break downs, to overstimulation, to avoiding new hobbies and interests so I don't get hyperfixated on something, to inability to make and keep friends, to so much more. I just feel so lost. What of it isn't autism? What if it's something else? But, what? Any words, or similar experiences would be nice please.

I was looking to seek an evaluation for a diagnosis with Fraser in Minnesota, USA. If anyone has any experience with them, let me know please.

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dear parents, if your child has "seemed fine this entire time" but is now seeking out diagnoses, mobility aids, medical help, more doctors, and is sharing their pain more. do not fucking shut them down? even if it ends up being nothing, showing them that support through all of that will seriously help them. if it ends up being something and you're a bitch to them, the joke will be on you and that strain on your relationship will never go away because. you didn't listen.

listen to kids. we tell you what we need, it's not that hard.

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It's always an excuse for you to use a different label that THEY understand better instead of having the willingness to just sit the fuck down and listen. (Not at OP)

"erm, why do you NEED to use the label mspec gay? just use homoflexible or achillean" because I dont like the name or the flags of either or those and both the label gay and mspec meant a lot to me and therefore are a permanent part of my identity now, suck it.

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@galaxy-starshine incase you're interested love

gauging interest...

if i were to set up a discord server specifically designed to be safe haven from antisemitism, would people be interested in joining?

it wouldnt be jewish exclusive, just designed around the safety of jewish people. since so many online spaces are so rife with antisemitism

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It's so.. interesting the way some ramcoa survivors (at least claiming to be) can go on about ramcoa online, their experiences with being a survivor, and not have any consequences.

How do you display yourself so willingly, especially young survivors, online and not have any consequences?

You say you went through the abuse, but had no side affects when you post your face online. You say you went through the abuse, but had no side effects when you say your trauma. You say you went through the abuse, but you're young with no therapist, so you don't have a safety net.

What will happen when you claim your parents abused and tortured you in horrific ways and they find out simply because YOU posted your FACE online? On a post, where you stated the abuse, and became descriptive about the abuse. Absolutely wild concept to me, but what the fuck do I know I guess

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!! PLEASE BOOST TO SUPPORT A DISABLED PERSON WITH AUTISM FINANCIALLY !!

[PT: Please boost to support a disabled person with autism financially. End ID]

I'm opening up art commissions.

What I will do:

Sketch of profile (5 bucks)

Sketch of chest to up (10 bucks)

Sketch of upper body to up including arms and hands (15 bucks)

Sketch of full body (20 bucks)

Outline of profile (22 bucks)

Outline of chest to up (24 bucks)

Outline of upper vody to up including arms and hands (26 bucks)

Outline of fully body (28 bucks)

All outlines with color plus shading range from +4 to +8 bucks! (Outline of profile would be 22, add color and shading would equal 26 bucks)

My intentions with the money

Buying safe foods

Buying accommodations that I can't get with an IEP or similar

Such as: fidget toys, ear mufflers, canes/fundings for a wheelchair

Funding music subscription (need for relief from uncontrollably loud noises, and also to remain focus)

Pins that can be utilized to depict my mood, fatique, pain I'm in, etc

Least important: investing in hyperfixations

DM to see pictures of my art! Can't post here as I have lack of spoons to add image ID and do not wish to lack accessibility in my post.

Payments I accept: cashapp ($canderson8008, gift cards, nitro, possibly zelle)

When it comes to cashapp and zelle, you will send 50% upfront first. Then, I will do the request and put a watermark over the drawing and show you to prove I did it. You will then send the other 50% and I will then remove the watermark and send you the drawing. Gift cards and nitro are a bit tedious, I will send you the drawing with watermarks all over it to prove I did it. Then you will send the payment, and then I will send the non-watermarked drawing.

You may also just send me money if you wish to really help, but there is absolutely no need to! Anything helps, even reblogging and/or liking does too.

@galaxy-starshine (hi love, please reblog :3)

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I would like to hear more if possible.

Think a lot about how my support needs affect my relationships with others. Just thinking.

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[Image ID: A tweet from @\ChronicMyalgicE that reads, "Why is it, that when you're sick and you're not getting better, people automatically assume you must be doing something wrong. Nobody says, 'I see you're trying so hard.' While we're trying so hardm #MECFS". end ID]

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Check out my blog @mogai-transcriber under the tag #> information for info and tips about this specific topic.

Okay to reblog/like even if you're on my DNI. I'm putting this on my disability blog because it relates to accessibility.

Let's talk about inaccessibility in the MOGAI/LIOM/Queer/LGBTQIA+ community online. Especially if you're a coiner, flag maker, or whatever.

Do you know how privileged it is to be able to not make any, and I mean ANY, of your posts accessible because you are arrogant about people being forced out of the community because of you? Specifically people who are visually impaired in any way which are forced out of the community because you're lack of willingness to be accessible?

There are many, MANY resources available to you to make your posts accessible. You absolutely can make your posts accessible. YOU, yes YOU, can absolutely fucking make YOUR POSTS accessible. Just fucking ask. Reach out.

You can draft your posts, you can look further into communities to make your post accessible before posting, you can save spoons to make your post accessible or wait until you have spoons to make them accessible, and you can look for others to create descriptions/plain text FOR YOUR POSTS.

At this point, there is no excuse to have none of your posts be accessible. "I don't have spoons," but making flags and counting terms also requires spoons. You aren't sneaky with not wanting to be accessible and putting in the work to do so. Oh, and we shouldn't have to be fucking BEGGING and ASKING for accessibility. BEING ACCESSIBLE SHOULD BE STANDARD.

[PT: Being accessible should be standard. End]

So you know what? Start calling people out on this ableist, arrogant behavior. And you know what else? It is ableist if you do not make no attempt to be accessible. Simply because, you have no reason to not be. If your blog shows absolutely NO ATTEMPT at being accessible, YOU need to change. Doesn't matter if it, 'ruins your aesthetic,' neither.

Start being accessible, or continue to have no care whatsoever for people who require that accessibility on your posts. Show no care and sympathy for people who are forced out of the community because of you.

Tags, asked to be removed

@chronicallycouchbound @epikulupu @xdle-coxns @galaxy-starshine @potato-head-kids @blindcultureis

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"RAMCOA/OEA is becoming a trend" doesn't mean we think your trauma is invalid, we just mean we think you want your trauma to be valid enough.

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[Image ID: A screenshot of a Tumblr ask from anonymous that reads, 'Sometimes people's meds don't fucking work or they can't get professional help because capitalism exists and everyone wants disabled and mentally ill people to die.' End ID]

I tried blocking the anon to see if you would show up on my block list but unfortunately not.

Anyway, obviously that post isn't about that specific group then. Reread the fucking post. Especially reread the last part. 🙄

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there are NO tunnels under al shifa hospital

the IDF is LYING to excuse their war crimes

don't stop talking about palestine

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"my symptoms are getting a lot worse" - yeah because you stopped taking your meds

"its hard to handle my disorder" because you don't take your meds

"my meds suck and have bad side affects" and did you tell your doctor that

"I stopped taking my meds because I'm so inconsistent loool" do you know how thats not funny at all and something you should actively be working on

"well my doctor wouldn't listen to me about my meds" has this happened or is this something you made up because you thought it would happen

Do you know how many times I see people spiral and lose control over their life simply because they thought it wouldn't do any harm if they stopped taking their meds? It is privileged to have some form of treatment accessible to you, only for you to not accept it simply because you just dont want to. Yes I have thought the same before. Did I fucking spiral? Yes of-fucking-course

And no this is not aimed at the people who genuinely don't have access to meds, or changing their meds at the moment. This is directed at people who actively can change, get, and recieve treatment via medication but simply don't accept it because they don't want to. While yes, it is your choice, you need to understand how privileged that is and the consequences that come with it. Not acknowledging the consequences, but you need to understand and accept the consequences.

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Since I've been posting a lot about Gaza today, here are charities that are still active that you can donate to if you have the ability:

Palestine Children's Relief Fund - Providing medical care, distributing food, delivering life-saving medications, and all of their services focus on children.

ANERA - Distributing food, hygiene kits, maintaining shelters, providing mobile clinics, and other necessities.

MECA - Focusing on children, providing emergency & medical services, delivering food & clothes, and other necessities.

MAUSA - Providing food packages, delivering hygiene kits, supplying hospitals, and other necessities.

Palestinian Red Crescent Society - Focusing on medical interventions, providing medical care, delivering medical supplies, and distributing urgent medications.

Life for Relief - Providing hot meals & water, hygiene kits, blankets & clothes, and other necessities.

***If you know of other charities or have information to add, please reblog with additions! ***