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<Female Singer's Name> and Screaming Penis

Imagine Nancy Sinatra doing a rendition of “Cut You Up With a Linoleum Knife”

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Wee Baby Fufu

Crossover thrash wearing French maid outfits and pink bows in their coifed, perfumed hair

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FUCK JOE BIDEN

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Driving past the freeway on my daily commute 7 miles to the gallon with a first-rate view Not a fairy in this town, we chased them out long ago My Southern values matter more than you’ll ever know This land is great and it should never change I don’t care what those commie bastards say My straight white children and a wife that cleans Let’s pour a glass for the American dream Graduated to a high paying job completely debt free There’s nothing quite like life in 1953 Saw a black guy on the sidewalk, better call 911 He got arrested for no reason, but at least I had some fun Dress up nice for church in my Sunday best Go back home and bone my wife, I am so blessed

when you think you’re a satirist but you accidentally write the most patriotic anthem of the decade

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Vicious Cancer - The Hard Labor Tour 2021

The long march through the institutions begins this summer. Tickets on pre-sale from Ticketmaster and the U.N. now!

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This can only be mounted on your pedalboard by a licensed professional, and may only be displayed every third Saturday except during Women’s History Month. Sounds great when running into the Electro-Horemonix Big Red Pi “Shut the Fuck Up” noise gate pedal.

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Play “Canon in Vitamin D” bruh

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The bass player turning away from the camera to hide his laughter is the best part. Also the 100% “fuck it” bass solo lmao

YEEEEE HAAAAWWWW

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“About a Hairspray Queen” by Jim Breuer and Eric Cartman

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Is this the end? The world may be on fire but you deserve  to warm your feet! Join your fellows and ladyfolk this splendid Saturday at The Portly Loon Saloon & Gentlemen’s Club for an afternoon imbibement featuring the musical stylings of the fantastic, the amazing, always sunny, never dreary, and daringly dapper in the face of certain demise, the Doomsday Peppers!

Come for the refreshment, stay for the Jazz Age era radio announcer voice you should be reading this in right now!

The Portly Loon, purveyors of sarsparilla* and fine spirits since 1872.

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how about a nice *BURRRRRP* football

ho....ho....*BURRRRRPPPP* hoooo

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Sweet, dudes, my lead bassitar loop programmer is a demisexual vegan.

Click here to download our free guitass sample library full of sweet guitass, bassitar, and a-rum-puh-pum-pum roodypoo loops and one-shots for your new bassiguitassitar ensemble

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Limp KoRn FriTTYrs in the barn now

Representin’ OGG VORBIS crew, straight up

Now I know y’all be lovin’ this shit righ here

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Mullet Alchemist

Tonight, in Clyde’s Big Ol’ Barn and BBQ!

I would be lying if I communicated that I would not, in fact, find copious enjoyment at the notification of your inclusion in the audience in attendance at such aforementioned shindig.

Barn doors at 7, show at 8. Opening acts include Testicular Heft and Ambitious Plan.

Come out and enjoy Mullet Alchemist live in concert, playing such hits as “I Entered Into Mortal Combat With the Intangible Legal Entity Determining Jurisprudence In Society (And I Did Not Emerge Victorious),” “All My X’s Solve For Texas,” and “Expulsion of High-Velocity, Half-Digested Semi-Solids Was the Only Reasonable Recourse (For That, I Am Sorry).”