gunnhome

[gunnhome]

Since I'm on vacation this one is short and sweet. Today I am grateful for my heart ❤️.....the JAGster. The blessing of being his mother and being annointed as one of two people who sole purpose is to mold him into a productive, achieving young man. Blessed....simply.

[gunnhome]

30 Days of Gratitude - Day #2

Today I’ll say thank you to my husband. My better half. The person who has witnessed all of my trials and triumphs over the past 24 years.  My protector, provider and sometimes “sanity checker”.  My co-navigator through these “parenting” waters. Grateful for his acceptance of me - flaws and all.  Loving me through it all. Who knew 24 years ago on FAMU’s campus we would be here? It’s been a journey…but quite an interesting and entertaining one. I can’t wait to see what the new the next 24 have in store.  Unconditional love and acceptance is a wonderful thing. (And yes… He is also my shoe addiction enabler….)

[gunnhome]

30 Days of Gratitude - Day #1

So it’s April 1st…and my month long birthday celebration has begun!!! Each day I will express one of my many blessings for which I am ever so grateful.  

Day 1… Grateful for my loving parents for giving me life and willingly sacrificed to mold me into the woman I am today.  They divorced when I was young, but my father was/still is ALWAYS THERE. My mother taught me how to look/act like a lady…but to have confident and an independent spirit (and my shoe addiction). For them I am grateful…

[gunnhome]

30 Days of Gratitude - Day #2

Today I'll say thank you to my husband. My better half. The person who has witnessed all of my trials and triumphs over the past 24 years.  My protector, provider and sometimes "sanity checker".  My co-navigator through these "parenting" waters. Grateful for his acceptance of me - flaws and all.  Loving me through it all. Who knew 24 years ago on FAMU's campus we would be here? It's been a journey...but quite an interesting and entertaining one. I can't wait to see what the new the next 24 have in store.  Unconditional love and acceptance is a wonderful thing. (And yes... He is also my shoe addiction enabler....)

[gunnhome]

30 Days of Gratitude - Day #1

So it's April 1st...and my month long birthday celebration has begun!!! Each day I will express one of my many blessings for which I am ever so grateful.  

Day 1... Grateful for my loving parents for giving me life and willingly sacrificed to mold me into the woman I am today.  They divorced when I was young, but my father was/still is ALWAYS THERE. My mother taught me how to look/act like a lady...but to have confident and an independent spirit (and my shoe addiction). For them I am grateful...

[gunnhome]

[gunnhome]

My mantra!!!  As long as YOU like yourself...that is all that matters.

[gunnhome]

Comfortable in my own skin...

Funny...when I turned 40 something happened.  It was the awakening of a self awareness that I don't believe I possessed before. My mother passed away very unexpectedly when I was 37..I wasn't prepared for how that would impact EVERY aspect of my life. (I'll go into detail in a later post).  To be honest, her death was the "true beginning" of my metamorphosis...but turning 40 kicked it into high gear. Oprah did a special on the power of saying "No".  And yes... I have become an expert at it. 

I have no desire to continue to be uncomfortable.  I am SO COMFORTABLE with who I am.  And I am actually very fine with who I am not.  I have accepted my flaws, ailments, misgivings and the fact that I WILL NEVER be perfect. That doesn't mean there isn't room for improvement.  But simply, I am happy with the woman I've become.

I have no desire to compete with anyone....not that I did before.  But I think that society can sway you from your path when you see the successes that peers may achieve. I KNOW that we all have our own path that is predestined by a higher power.  I am perfectly COMFORTABLE and CONFIDENT in my lane.

[gunnhome]

Taking it one day at a time.  Breathing each step along the way.

[gunnhome]

The Art of being Selfish

As I continue along the path of this transition, the learnings continue to flow.  It is amazing how you can get “lost” in the daily activities of life.  As a mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend….there is always something/someone who needs you.  You find yourself in the constant circle of giving, giving, giving.  Weeks, months and years go by and then it happens.  You realize that you have been ignoring one KEY person, YOU.  

I decided this was the year of ME. Taking time out to do the things I need to do for myself.  That doesn’t mean I am ignoring everything/everyone else.  It simply means that I have reprioritized.  I have made the conscious decisions to give everyone/everything a piece of a better ME.   In other words, I am focused more on ME.

 In the beginning it was difficult, there was guilt about not being at EVERY school event.  Especially since I was not working.  But believe me, the guilt diminishes rather quickly J I pick and choose what I want to participate in based on what I have on my list that particular day.  

I have no idea how long this period in my life will last.  This is my moment to BREATHE…and I plan to take full advantage of it.

[gunnhome]

Be yourself! Love yourself!

[gunnhome]

Simply grateful....

[gunnhome]

[gunnhome]

Looking back I realize this is so true.  I was drowning in chaos trying to survive.

[gunnhome]

One of many firsts....

This time off has allowed me to experience many "firsts", for that I am truly grateful.  

This evening I spent time baking batches of brownies for my son's bake sale at school tomorrow.  My son is half way through his fifth grade year in school and this is THE VERY FIRST TIME I have TRULY baked something.  Yes... I have always participated in the bake sales and parties that he has had at school.  However, I perfected the art of buying something and putting in on a plate from home...(I'm sure my sister working moms know what I am talking about). I never had time (or the desire or energy) to bake something from scratch and send it into school.

Well these days...I not only baked tonight, but am working the 8am shift at the bake sale table. We made it into an event of quality time with my son assisting my efforts in the kitchen.  

Quality time comes in many forms...and I am trying my best to take advantage of all of them.  I know this time is limited...he won't want to be near me in 3 years or so...lol.

[gunnhome]

Saw this and it inspired me to post.  I have been waiting and waiting for the perfect moment and 2 months later...here I am.  #thereisnoperfectmoment #seizetheday

[gunnhome]

The budget talk...

So it has taken me quite some time to complete the post on this topic.  Many of my fellow working moms that want to make the jump to this side (for whatever reason) have all asked... "Girl, how did you figure out the money thing?"  

It truly was one of the most difficult things about making the decision to stay home was the "budget" talk.  You know...the talk you MUST have with your spouse to go over current finances and future financial goals to make sure all parties are on the same page.  The level of uncomfortableness of this topic may also depend on how your marriage/union was financially set up from the beginning.

We got married at 30...so we both were working and financially independent when we joined as one.  So we have a his/hers/ours system.  Doesn't work for everyone, works for US..no judgment.

I have always been overly concerned/responsible with my finances.  I have multiple color coded spreadsheets and can tell you to the penny how much is in my checking or savings account or owed on a credit card at any given time (remember Finance is my background).  I know my credit score every month... hey...that's just who I am.  But now, I have put myself in a position where I have to convey EVERYTHING. 

My husband completely understands that woman he married. So when he asked for my budget (spreadsheet)...he was "gentle".  I immediately started having a "small" anxiety attack.  He asked again after I didn't send him my spreadsheet right away.  He persuaded me to list EVERYTHING.  There are certain things (hair, nails) that can't be completely sacrificed with this decision...cut back yes, cut out... no! He insisted that I keep them in my number.  My occasion need to feed my shoe addiction...yup, included.  As well as all the expenses that go to support the household that don't necessarily have a specific line item to be grouped under ... all in there.

So I pressed "send" on the email and and then waited (with a glass of wine or two or the bottle..no judging) for the "TALK".  I must admit it was not nearly as bad as I had imagined.  Again, you have to KNOW your SPOUSE. You also have to KNOW YOURSELF. I knew I would need to cut back on some frivolous spending.  He knew there were some things I would need to continue to do to be ME. I knew there would be some expenses that would be reduced simply as a result of the decision (dry cleaning, gas, the lunchtime shopping).  We both came away with a PLAN that works for US. Having a SUPPORTIVE SPOUSE is crucial - it won't work if you both aren't committed to the decision.  COMMUNICATION is key.  TRUST, HAVE FAITH and IT WILL workout.