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isaac: I'm such a bad person but in a funny way. Like I'm inviting a bunch of my packmates who hate each other to go bowling for my birthday just to see how they interact. Hopefully they fight.

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boyd: your phone is ringing. Must be your boyfriend, Stiles.

derek: he’s not my boyfriend

derek: *picks up phone*

derek: hey, babe

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the entire pack blocks him after this

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he’s freaky just not that freaky 😔

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more jealous stiles please

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Derek: the first time I met Jackson, he gave me two dollars. It wasn’t necessary and nobody asked him to do it, but he still did it.

Jackson: I thought he was homeless.

Stiles: I mean, technically—

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Do you reblog polls as well? Stiles is currently in the They Should Have Been Queer Tournament and he's losing round 1 😭 https://www.tumblr.com/mostbelovedqueer/787999360551108608/they-should-have-been-queer-tournament-round-1?source=share

Sorry just saw this 😭 I think the voting is over 💔

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stiles, according to season 1 & 2 teen wolf

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[texting]

stiles: I have a question for you.

derek: yes, I’d cry if you died.

derek: yes, I’d still love you if you were a worm.

derek: yes, I still love you.

derek: no, I don’t want to break up with you.

stiles: ok, thank you.

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Derek doesn’t even have a private account — he manually softblocks the pack whenever they follow him. He has Cora permanently blocked for her own safety and mental wellbeing. He’s thoughtful like that 🩷

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Shenanigans

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season two lydia: I’m the sexiest bitch in this therapy waiting room.

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stiles: are we flirting or are we fighting right now because I'm kind of getting mixed signals.

derek: I'm gonna sink my teeth into your fucking throat!

stiles: Still proving my point. Mixed... mixed messages.

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erica, looking outside the window: stiles, jackson and isaac are shouting at each other again. Do you think we should do something?

boyd: yeah.

boyd: [closes the window]

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concept:

the usual historical fiction au where derek is a prince and stiles is like a royal of another realm. derek is maybe in a relationship with paige, maybe just enjoying being alone, when he's told he is going to have to marry this random guy from another realm in order for his mother to secure an alliance with king scott of the beacon lands, or king john or whoever.

derek hates this and tries to refuse but he doesn't really have a choice, so he resolves to be as petty and make life for this 'stiles' as miserable as possible. he writes the shittiest letters in response to stiles' long and in depth ones, sends over terrible gifts that are not personal at all, doesn't even open the paintings and things stiles sends his way, and the day stiles arrives to his realm (couple of days ahead of the wedding) derek doesn't even show up to greet him/welcome him.

talia is so angry at him for the last one especially, and tells him how devastated the poor stiles was and derek is all like 'good' in his head, and resolves to be even more terrible, hoping that maybe it will be enough for stiles to beg his king to undo the nuptials.

however he cannot avoid him forever, and later on he's sitting at dinner with his family when cora walks in with stiles. derek turns around--

and is immediately struck silent cause stiles is the most beautiful guy he has ever seen in his life? large brown bambi eyes that catch every light in the room, pale skin dotted with stars- with moles, and as he listens to cora, the most radiant smile he has ever seen. and his scent! he's like a dream come true.

and then stiles looks at him.

and instead of blushing and looking away, or looking heartbroken, or anything like the docile creature his mother had described him as, stiles looks at derek top to bottom, discretely sneers, and pointedly goes to sit between cora and laura, refusing to engage with derek at all.

talia is ripping her hairs. peter thinks this is hilarious. cora and laura look disappointed with derek and completely taken with stiles. derek's dad is actively ignoring the table.

and derek spends the entire meal gathering the courage to speak any word at all to stiles, to pay him a compliment or even apologise for not being there to greet him-

just for stiles to completely ignore him and loudly, in a very un-princely manner, ask laura if she also hears that fastidious fly making odious noise in the background.

laura is terribly amused. derek is lowkey mortified. talia doesn't even know what to say. stiles just sniffs delicately and continues ignoring derek.

cue three days of derek trying his best to apologise to stiles while stiles really makes him work for it, filled with misunderstanding and hilarity, idk

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another one, thank you

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was going to make it berica but this is so much funnier to me