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Time Waits For No One

Our perception of time is interesting. When we have it, it’s often wasted. If we are fortunate enough to know when it may run out, we want to savor it. When it’s gone we miss it. After losing so many coworkers and relatives including my parents, time is always on my radar. It has been since I fell ill with an autoimmune disease in 1993. And, I’ve been constantly reminded about time’s fleeting…

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Live Long Enough

At different points in my life I’ve asked the questions, who am I? What defines me? What is my purpose? I can tell you the answers sometimes vary but there are some things that are constant. I am a woman living with a rare disease who doesn’t accept that I can’t be or do something because of how God made me. So, I am also an author, a journalist, a wife, a present aunt, godmother, a friend and…

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Dying For Relatable Content About Chronic Illness

I binge-watched the show, “Dying For Sex,” which is based on the true story of a woman diagnosed with terminal cancer. It details her quest for sexual exploration while facing her health crises with her best friend.  Now, this isn’t an endorsement for the show. I definitely had issues with a lot of it.   However, as a chronically ill woman who faced life and death situations,  I realized it had…

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Stay Aware

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” — Mahatma GandhiI have been living with the chronic illness, IGG4-RD for most of my adult life. What I didn’t know is that people like me have a “holiday. “ I only learned about IGG4 Awareness Day recently when I was asked to speak about my advocacy for people living with autoimmune diseases. One of the people I was…

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A Life Well Lived Includes Extending Kindness To Strangers

I was in the middle of a conversation with a coworker when I heard Joy Behar share the news that Meredith Vieira’s husband, journalist and author Richard Cohen had died.  I was overcome with a feeling of sadness then relief knowing how much he’d endured due to his battle with MS.  I never met Mr. Cohen in person but we became acquainted in 2014. An agent at Serendipity Literary in Brooklyn…

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Day 29: Extended Christmas Sweater Countdown — Togetherness Is Free

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Day 24: Christmas Sweater Countdown — Blend Old Traditions With New 

I cook all the  time but I’m always nervous that, for some reason, wherever I am making may not turn out right. To avoid any additional stress at the holidays, I try to stick with the classics: baked Mac & cheese, turkey, spiral ham, chicken cutlets, dressing, mashed potatoes, etc… This year on Christmas Day my husband and I will be visiting his side of the family. We are bringing a few things…

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Day 23: Christmas Sweater Countdown -Don’t Kill Yourself Over One Day

A friend of mine sent me a message warning me not to do too much this holiday season like standing for hours cooking. Here’s the thing: I’m not good at following instructions. When I am feeling good, which simply means very little pain, I do everything my body will allow. I catch up on cleaning, cooking and organizing around the house. Lately, I find that my joints are screaming at me the next…

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Day 22: Christmas Sweater Countdown — Never Stop Searching

House hunting has turned my smile upside down. After a whole day of driving and walking around, no bid. Finding a home that will be easy for me to navigate as walking, climbing and lifting things becomes more difficult has proved challenging, especially when you add in a good size yard, reasonable property taxes, a fair price and a close proximity to the city.  Adding to the frustration are…

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Day 21: Christmas Sweater Countdown - Free Yourself

Ever felt stuck in your life? I know I have. I’ve felt like I’m not progressing in my career or in my writing. I could bear it if, at the same time, I didn’t feel stagnant in my personal life too, especially when it comes to finding a new home.  I find the best way to free myself is to take action. To do something, anything to make a change. This month it’s funny, ugly Christmas sweaters and…

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Day 20: Christmas Sweater Countdown - Pay Attention To Your True Wealth 

I’m not wealthy in the traditional sense. I work a 9-6 job, five days a week. I published four books but not one of them has become bestseller or earned me enough cash to stop working full-time. But, I have a home, a car and I can take vacations. Of course, this only refers to the cash or material wealth I can access.  Yet, like so many others, I realized I’ve been focused on the wrong kind of…

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Day 19: Christmas Sweater Countdown - Savor Fleeting Moments Of Glee

Christmas is a lot like a wedding. You spend months planning for the big day and then it comes and goes in a flash. You spend countless hours decorating. You pick out gifts,  imagining what each person’s reaction will be to them. And, you plan out what you are going to wear. When everything is wrapped and in its place you wait.  It seems like it takes forever for everyone to arrive at the…

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Day 18: Christmas Sweater Countdown- Pause To Show Your Love

I don’t think it was my “milkshake” that drove old friends and coworkers to wish me a happy birthday yesterday. I actually don’t know what made people take time out of their day to think of me but I’m grateful. It’s not often that you are reminded that your very presence on this earth matters to others. Quite often we forget to call, to schedule visits or to send a quick note or text to family…

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Day 17: Christmas Sweater Countdown- Fake It Until It Manifests

“Happiness depends upon ourselves.” —Aristotle I am not in the happiest period of my life. I am happy to be alive and to charge into a new year.  But, I’m still living with the residual effects of a difficult five year period where a more than a third or more of my closest relatives including my parents have perished.  Add to that the physical and professional challenges I’ve faced and I’ve…

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Day 16: Christmas Sweater Countdown- Keep Family History Alive 

A couple of days ago, my cousin texted me to ask for my father’s shrimp toast recipe. I sent her a photo of the recipe. However, I realized the image was so small it would be too difficult for her to read. So, I offered to send her a copy of the book of recipes that I made for my brothers. It contains only a fraction of the dishes my parents used to make during our childhood. Some additional…

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Day 15: Christmas Sweater Countdown- Gift Your Opinion Sparingly

The only person I share my opinion with consistently is my husband. I’m not sure he always wants it or appreciates it but I try to be transparent about my thoughts and feelings. I’m not looking for him to blindly agree with everything I say. Rather I want him to take it in and consider my side. I do not freely offer my opinion on anyone else’s circumstances, situations or hardship unless I’m…

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Day 14: Christmas Sweater Countdown — Find Contentment  

When my mother was about 55 years old.  she called me and told me she was taking singing lessons. She said was leaving work one day and picked up a free paper from a box on the street. She saw the class and signed up. She went to classes faithfully for weeks. Then, the time came for the final class or should I say the big performance.  An hour before her debut, she rummaged through the jewelry…