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Hey gang for those of you waiting for my return just letting you know that running the muppet joker account has put a very real strain on my real life marriage and I have decided to step away from the blog for the foreseeable future.

I have been talking to her and everone else in my personal life "in character" as the muppet joker so that my blog would be as true to life as possible. I have been wearing Joker makeup around the house, which at first she found funny, but now she can't even look at me. I started compulsively fantasizing about the muppets and it's ruining our sex life. I accidentally called her Kermit in the bedroom and she made me sleep on the couch for a week.

Our son turned one year old this year on July 5th, on the day of Dashcon 2. My wife begged and pleaded with me to stay home and celebrate his birthday, but I was stupid and selfish and had become completely taken over by the muppet joker persona at that point. I went. I returned home to an ultimatum. Its my family, or it's the muppet joker. I chose my family.

Sorry tumblr. I have failed you. I have failed my wife. I have failed my son. I have to go now, to be with them, and to watch my child grow up.

Goodbye, Homosapiens

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i love my stupid phannie life. went to hang out with a friend, took a picture next to the polish phannie mekka and found truth bombs at the thrift store.

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really like how 90% of this video was dan saying "phil you wouldn't even wanna date this guy, he just wouldn't know how to take care of you. guys let me tell you exactly how to properly take care of phil"

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GUYS I JUST HAD A VISION! Dan and phil as two teddy bears with a sign "DO NOT SELL SEPARATELY" and someone was looking over the phil bear wondering "huh where are the care instructions?" and then picking up dan bear and he has care instructions for him and "care instructions for phil: ..."

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fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this

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I got myself the Dan bed sheets at ikea today!!!

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Dan and Phil didn't upload Easter Baking. The Pope, in his weak physical state could not bare it. He died on Easter Monday when he woke up and saw no Phupload.

Dan and Phil killed the Pope, pass it on.

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POPE FRANCIS IS DEAD

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i was gonna say it’s fascinating how seriously everyone is taking the joke about dan having a massive bong or whatever but then i thought about the scenario where people start believing it so wholeheartedly that he ends up saying something about it. i want to force dan into denying smoking weed with Very Real Living Celebrity Hacker T Dog actually. like… carry on i want to hear what he says

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Reblog if you got the Dan and Phil autism instead of the maths one

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I'm gonna burn a cd of the tit pre-show playlist

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I'm so excited to see my dads live in 2h!!!!

(i wish i could have gotten the merch but I'm broke:( , might make my own photo cards later tho)

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THEY DID IT AGAIN!!! It's too late to watch a 2h video rn :( but at least i have something to look forward to tomorrow

I can't stand these two twinks. It's 11pm and they posted a 2,5h video I HAVE TO GO TO SLEEP i have places to be tomorrow !!!!

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IT'S TIMEEEEE

Happy Ides of March!!