poignuance

[poignuance]

Dirt is, after all, just matter out place, and my heart was supposed to bear your love, not drown in its remnants.

[poignuance]

You don't have to put your hand in my hair after another night of trying to make me accept your patience. I will never be deserving of either.

[poignuance]

my mind wandered to a shackled door last night and your name was on the plaque. i moved closer, transfixed, and screamed myself hoarse when those memories sucked me in. i think i popped in a couple of lozenges but they soothed nothing. your eyes held mine and reminded me that you've never responded to leverage. in any case, i never had anything to hold over you, not even my heart.

maybe i should've seen it in the way your jaw clenched when the traffic lights turned red—you were a universe beyond being exasperated. calm skies and tranquil waters never knew us. in that den, i sat with you as you raged and raged. you looked at me not once. then again, you only ever looked at a mirror, hoping to see me there instead of your own wretched face. so in the absence of your peace, all peace fled. so serenity never knew us.

she knew me now. she knew me. you never did. you never wanted to, did you?