rubyfirenight

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Laswell: So let me get this straight-

Gaz: Bold of you to assume that.

Laswell: *Glares* As I was saying, Ghost doesn't have any passport, let alone legal documents.

Ghost: I've been legally dead for years, you should know this, Laswell.

Laswell: Roach never bothered to get a passport, even though he has been out of the country several times.

Roach: I couldn't be fucking bothered.

Laswell: Gaz's isn't from the UK, it's from Nigeria.

Gaz: Mum migrated over here when I was 5 months old. Been a citizen since I was two.

Laswell: Soap's is at least from the UK, but it's expired since the early 2000s.

Soap: Yep. Sounds about right.

Laswel: And Price has several?!

Price: My dad's Canadian, my mother's Welsh, and I was born on an Australian Air Force base. So yeah, Duel citerzenships. I keep them up to date too.

Laswell: I need to lie down.

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Shadow 1: Hey, Lukes, look how the cap is standing

Shadow 2: Where- Oh my god- *starts laughing*

Shadow 1: Ya know he had to do it to 'em

Shadow 2: to the CEO-

Shadow 1 & 2: *laughing hysterically*

Graves: *staring at them stunned*

Shadow 1: Oh-

Shadow 2, still laughing: Hey, boss

Graves: ... I think I need a refresher on the gossip around base

Shadow 1, taking off running: I AIN'T A SNITCH

Graves:

Shadow 2:

Graves: If you run-

Shadow 2: Hold on, I'm pulling up the doc

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If you're reading this...

go write three sentences on your current writing project.

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The 141 at breakfast at base

Price: *thoroughly not awake eating yet, eating some toast*

Soap: Mornin' *Steals a piece of toast off Price's plate*

Ghost: *Notices Price is not a possessive of his food as he usually is.*

Price: *Smirking into his coffee*

Ghost: Soap, wait!

Soap: Ehh, yuck!- The fuck is that?!

Price: Vegemite

Soap: Why the fuck do you get that disgusting thing!?

Price: My dad's Australian.

Soap: eh-what?

Price: My dad's Australian, my Mom's Welsh. I obtained Australian citizenship and a passport, along with everything else. Could transfer to the SASR if I wanted to.

Ghost: How did we not find out about this?

Price: Mate, there are many things you don't know about me.

Lmfao I fucking love Vegemite

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Price and Graves are meeting up, having a whisky and rum gossip night.

Price: *back cracking as hell learns backwards* Got damn, I'm too old for this shit.

Graves: Right?! One of my Shadows called me old and I said that I did serve in Nam. You should've seen his face!

Price: I'm stealing that. I hope you know that.

Graves: Go ahead. Next time they make a comment im going to tell them I think I look pretty spry for someone who served in the Cold War.

Price: Holy shit! You got any more ideas?

Graves: *pulling out a notebook* Oh, Johnathon! You have no idea!

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Soap: Why on earth did you give a knife to Graves?!

Nikolai: He felt unsafe.

Soap: Well now i feel unsafe.

Nikolai:

Soap:

Nikolai: Do you want a knife?

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Graves: What do you think "take out" means?

Shadow 4-3: Dating.

Shadow 6-1: Food.

Shadow 2-1: Murder or a mission.

Shadow 3-2: All three if your not a coward!

Graves: Why did I even think to ask.

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Price: Look, it's simple. All you have to say is "Hi, I took a blood test and I wanted my results back?". Got it?

König, letting the phone ring: *Nods*

Nurse: Hello, can I help you?

König: *Panics* I want my blood back.

König: *Hangs up*

Price:

König:

Horangi: And you wonder why I make the phone calls for him.

Ghost: That went about as well as I expected.

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the price retiring scenario - what’s graves up to? is he also making the newbie cry? is he sitting back with his aviators on, watching the chaos unfold and texting price to keep him updated? are his shadows helping chimera strip the base?

Graves is definitely his informate. He is having so much fun with this. He's sending pictures like a teenage girl gossiping about the girl they can't stand. Shadow Company lingering around base after Price's departure is beyond intimidating, they won't answer to the new captain, barely acknowledge him.

And Graves is as overly friendly as southern hospitality requires, a threat on each word flavored with some honey.

He's making the new captain so uncomfortable. And he's enjoying it. They can't simply throw him off base due to previous arrangements. The last thing anyone wants is Shadow Company becoming hostile when they've made themselves at home on SAS soil. So they're stuck with Graves.

And the boys? Graves swears they've never been this nice to him. Not even before the initial betrayal. He's best friends with them again, and he's not a fool, he knows this is only happening because they share a common enemy. Once they're successful in running off the new captain and causing hell for command, they'll go back to hating his guts.

So Graves is having a damn good time. And yes, he's helping Nik grab everything Chimera ever brought onto that base. Every piece of paper or screw that came loose. Nik's showing his petty side and Graves is so into it.

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Shadow 2-1: We got you a present! It's in your office.

Graves: Aww, you shouldn't have!

Shadow 3-2: Hope you enjoy it, Commander~

Shadow 6-1: *very obviously bandaged hand* Please do, it was so hard to get, and I had to do most of the heavy lifting.

Grave: Oh-kay..?

Shadow 4-3: Just remember to be responsible and don't break your toy, okay?

Graves: I'll take your advice under consideration.

Graves: *walks into his office*

Price: *Tied up and with rope, with his thighs parted, sitting on his desk.* Uhh... Hi..? I don't know how I got here?

Graves: *Smiling like a maniac, leaning over into Price's space* Oh, this is the best present I've had in a while~~

Meanwhile, with the Shadows....

Shadow 2-1: Do you think he'll enjoy it?

*Loud bang coming from Grave's office.*

Shadow 3-2: Oh, I'm sure he's enjoying it~ +4, Uno by the way.

Shadow 6-1: Oh, motherfucker- Did we even tell Laswell we did this?

Shadow 4-3: Yeah, I called her like four hours after we got the ropes tied.

Shadow 2-1: You have Laswell's number?

Shadow 4-3: Yeah, well, her wife's actually, we have gossip wine nights on Sundays. You do not want to know that amount of shit Laswell complains about.

Shadow 3-2: Please take me with you next time!

Shadow 4-3: Absolutely not. Why do you have too many cards!?

Shadow 6-1: YOU TRY PLAYING UNO WITH ONE FUCKING HAND!!!

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The 141 are on a mission

Soap: So what's our signal?

Price:

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Price, taking out a thick folder: This is all if Roach's insult in BSL so your pea-sized plebian mind can at least understand how he's cursing your bloodline

SAS offical: By the holy mary mother of god, please stop-

Price: Also make sure König takes his anti-pyschotic, anti-anxiety, anti-depression and anti-hallucinogenic medications beacuse he will either murder everyone on base and it will be a blood bath or he will end up sobbing in the corner, in either scenario, send Horangi on him.

SAS Offical: im gonna die-

Price: Speaking of Horangi, if he starts an underground gambling ring just make sure you or any other officals do anything stupid or act suspicious and it will die off on its own, but since your... you... That ring is going to stay strong.

SAS official: You just gestured to all of me-

Price: If Nikolai starts having a wierdly absurd amount of weapons, just ignore it or you'll disappear like the last one that asked question.

SAS offical: I'LL DISAPPEAR-!

Price: That bit also applys to Graves, if he does any extra shit, just let Nik know, he'll give me a call, we'll fuck him back down to an acceptable level. He just want attention that fucker.

SAS Offical: Wait please i think i fucked up!-

Price: Toodles~

SAS Official: I can't- You're done, Price! You're gone!

Price: *immediately starts taking off his gear*

SAS Official: What-

Price, setting down a pocket fire extinguisher: This is incase Sergeant MacTavish gets carried away. And he certainly will at some point

SAS Official: Wait-

Price, setting down a human muzzle: If you take Lieutenant Riley's masks away you're going to need this. Oh, and watch out for his emotional support knife

SAS Official: Wait, can we talk-

Price: Oh, and Sergeant Garrick will not be nice. Make sure my replacement doesn't cry easy... or make sure they have years of therapy under their belt

SAS Official: John-

Price, walking out: And I have a feeling that Chimera will be withdrawing their support, I know that for a fact. Have fun with Laswell!

SAS Official: JONATHAN-

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Ghost, after coming back from a solo mission, said he had used the local forest as a food source. (He's fucking with them.)

Private: You ran out of MREs?! What did you eat?!

Ghost:

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Soap: *Being annoying during sparring* Nico-Nico-Nii! Gaz: *On the same wavelength* Nico-Nico-Nii! Roach: *Woke up and chose violence* Nico-Nico-Nii Ghost: *Deadpanned* I swear if you keep doing that, I'm going to break your nico-nico-kneecaps. Price: *Turned them out a while ago.* Ghost, don't hurt your brothers.

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*The 141 are captured (Like that ever happen but roll with me here) and are being interrogated* Captor: Give me a piece of information I can use. Roach: *Blurts out without thinking* I'm puking in a sock and giving it to my mum for Valentine's day Captor: *Stunned silence* Soap: Your MA?! Gaz: There are so many layers to that! Ghost: *Cackling like a madman* Price: *Trying not to smile* Sometimes I fucking love this family.

Meh source: https://youtu.be/u8K25jd_Hig?t=1207

Honestly, this whole video could just be Roach, Gaz, Ghost and Soap fucking around. I promise you it's fucking funny. (To my humour at least)

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Soap: *High on Pain Medication* Do you know the muffin man? Gaz: *Also quite high on pain meds* The muffin Man? Roach: *Matching the ADHD Brainwaves, Just got dosed with Pain meds* Yes, I know the muffin man, the one who lives on Drury Lane? Soap: *Grinning like an idiot* Well, she's married to the Muffin man... Gaz: The muffin Man? Roach: THE MUFFIN MAN! Ghost: *The only one uninjured absolutely cackling* Price: *Just trying to get his hand stitched up, also trying not to laugh*

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Price: *Walking into the common area* Last night I had the strangest dream- Soap: *ADHD-ing* I sailed away to China Gaz: *Joining in* In a little row boat to find ya Ghost: *Woke and chose violence* And you said you had to get your laundry cleaned Roach: *Also choose violence* Don't want no one to hold you, what does that mean? All-Price: *Singing terribly* Ain't nothin' gonna break my stride, Nobody gonna slow me down Oh no, I've got to keep on moving Ain't nothin' gonna break-a my stride I'm runnin' and I won't touch ground Oh no, I've got to keep on moving Price: I fucking hate all of you.