symptoms-syndrome - Tumblr blog

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Wait a minute, you're telling me that when presented with similar situations at different points in time, you will think and act differently based on factors such as who else is around or your mood? Your feelings and opinions change occasionally as a result of the passage of time? IDK, I think you have some sort of disorder. Normal people have a static sense of self, or so I've been told. I have a disorder, you see.

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Art by Essi Välimäki

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Who are you talking about? Uwo?

Unwelc0me-Oz!an

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LOL I look in the tags for once in a blue moon and see that UWO, who I said was overtly racist and shitty and spreading misinfo, and who ppl still followed/RBed from, has been discovered as a creeper weirdo. Who woulda guessed.

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One of those tough but productive therapy sessions this week. I did it at my partners' place. It was nice being able to be hugged after therapy. I didn't go into it a lot, but I mentioned how it was mostly about how I was thought of as really scary and mean and dangerous. My partner that was home at the time seemed like. IDK surprised by that. A lot of people are.

I had talked earlier in the week about how I'm kind on purpose. I worry a lot about whether I'm a Good Person or not, but that doesn't really fit in my personal ideology anyways (I don't really think there are Good and Bad People) so I choose to be kind. It's an active choice for me. And that makes me feel better about being kind. I fixed a fluffy doggy bed that one of my partners likes to hang out on (comfier than sitting on the floor when he wants to sit on the floor, plus doggie vibes) that had a hole in it, and helped clean the house (did dishes that had piled up and folded laundry.) They both appreciated it a lot and made sure I knew so, I know they've both been really overwhelmed lately so I'm happy to help.

I also got to go to the zoo with one of them! I loved hearing him talk about the animals he knew about and he said he really appreciated how I take time to look at them all and listen to him talk instead of rushing through.

I really appreciate how communicative we all are. It's really nice. I'm so lucky to have them in my life.

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2nd nov 2017

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Really really really awful trauma nightmare about SpEd last night :< woke up crying???

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These past few days I've been feeling this like. Crushing sense of loneliness and I'm not really sure why. I've been spending time with friends more than usual lately, I feel loved and cared for by them. But as soon as I'm alone I can't stand it. I've been asking my roommates to hang out in the same room as me (we don't necessarily do anything together, but parallel play helps) but obvi they need their alone time sometimes.

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How to Dress a Fish, Abigail Chabitnoy

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you lament how it hurts to be misunderstood, but do you realize how frightening it will be the moment you are understood. are you ready to not retreat when it happens

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one day it will hurt less. one day you won’t think about them every few hours. you will sing that song you used to sing together. you will go to that restaurant you used to go to together. you will begin to move on and realize they were just a person meant to be there for a while, not forever.