#<- and ofc it has another place on it
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I love you albums. I love you songs connected by similar themes. I love you listening to songs in a specific order picked by the artist. I love you reoccurring motifs throughout the same album. I love you album covers. I love you albums with extended editions. I love you songs that reference each other.
#guys i fucking love listening to albums fr#best thing CDs have done for me is forcing me to listen to albums in order#this post is about. so many albums and artists#bad suns#imagine dragons#Set It Off#bastille#FUCKING HELL BASTILLE#theyre albums are SO GOOD#guys seriously. give me the future + dreams of the past. go listen to it. its so fucking good#doom days also fuckin slaps man. my fav oart is the fact the first 3 songs merge together for me until i realise million pieces is playing.#<- and ofc it has another place on it#also Imagine Dragons‘ Mercury 1+2 OUGH#the tone shift as you go through the double album until it does a full circle#sometimes a good album can be made up of songs that are banger after banger#<- All This Bad Blood-bastille Night Visions-ID smoke+mirrors-id apocalypse whenever-bad suns elsewhere-sio etc#and sometimes a good album can be made of songs that tell a progressive story while referencing eachother to enhance meaning and connect wit#-with the artists lived experinces#<- give me the future + dreams of the past-bastille mercury act I+II-ID Duality-sio#Tree Man Posts#music
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Commissions are open 👇
#tadc pomni#pomni#my art#post#tadc#tadc kinger#tadc fanart#I love tadc#the newest episode made kinger a lot of people’s fav character#I like him a lot more now#the whole episode I was hoping he wouldn’t throw out stupid one liners in serious situations#I’m so satisfied with what we got#I love kingers character now#ofc he’s not my favourite pomni takes that place#I just had to talk about that for a sec#anyways hi I won’t be posting for another two months /j#ALSO I’ll still be posting cuphead stuff just not as much#the interest has worn off#ofc I still love cuphead it has a special place in my heart#I’m just not as interested in it anymore and have other things I want to do#fanart#the amazing digital circus
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so interesting how mitski called her album ‘the land is inhospitable’ when all throughout it, however alone she feels, the land is there and present. there’s the mosquitos, there’s a bug at the bottom of her glass, there’s the snow, the frost, a bird, the moon, the darkness as a living, breathing thing. and more importantly, every one of these elements is a manifestation of her feelings; the loss she feels, the love she feels. like a love that’s haunting the land. and then we get to the second part of the album name, ‘and so are we,’ we understand that it’s bc she is also being haunted by love. it’s the only thing she has, ´my love mine all mine’. except it’s everywhere. the land is inhospitable because it’s being haunted by this love, meaning she belongs, meaning in the end she can say she’s ‘king of all the land’ bc it’s her love that reigns, meaning no matter how ‘inhospitable’ it is and how much it hurts, she could never let it go
#idk if this makes sense 😭 and i do think there’s more to it or that it could be seen different with the land as a metaphor for smth else#or multiple things but this is what i’ve gotten from the two times i’ve listened which is ofc not a lot#have thoughts abt heaven as seemingly taking place outside of the land? and how the presence of another person kinda alters the mood? but#thats for another time#mitski#the land is inhospitable and so are we#jasmine has thoughts
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When you have the idea so vividly in your head and you get to the canvas and you wondered why you even try
Anyways some royal au really shitty thumbnail scribble for Raven's backstory and fear of flowers (cw: blood, talks of death and corpse)
I dont blame you if you dont get it scdjhbscdbhjsdcjbhcsdhjbscdhbj

But the idea was young Raven who assisted Viktor in the work that stained her hands early on. In the Royal AU, Viktor is a known assassin that carried out his business in the basement of their home, where contracts were signed, secrets exchanged and bodies left to rot until they can disposed of. So with the air thick with the foul stench and metallic scent of blood, Viktor always sent Raven for a simple task.
Bring back flowers and herbs.
At first, she didn’t question it. Of course she didn't, she was young, and Viktor was all she knew. Viktor was her guardian, her mentor, the only constant in her life, the one that brought her back from the brink of death. So. she did as she was told. Every day, she gathered bundles of lavender, rosemary, thyme, and rose petals—herbs and flowers known for their strong fragrances, their use in purifying spaces, and their ability to hide the unpleasant scents. Sometimes she gather the flowers and put them in small pouches, sometimes she would have to boil them in a liquid that the maid never name.
When she was old enough, she knew what these flowers were for then. She arranged them carefully around the dimly lit cellar, the mingling scents pushing back against the stink of blood and rot.
What meant to be pretty flowers became something she feared against. The once sweet smelling lavender now becomes lost its colors and turned sickly, the roses stained with red.
Flower fields are nothing but a reminder, a show of guilt.
When it came time to dispose of the bodies, they traveled under the cover of night, the place of disposal was never the same, but the path back to the house was unmistakable.
The always had to cross a vast field of sunflowers. Towering, golden, and ever-facing the sun, they stood as if they were watching. To Raven, they were more than just flowers.
They were witnesses. Their wide, unblinking faces followed her as she walked among them, as if they knew.
Even though she had never taken a life, she knew she was just as guilty as Viktor.
He killed, she helped him bury the truth.
He painted the floor red, she covered it with petals.
But the sunflowers did not care for the differences, did they? In the end, she is one with Viktor, sharing the same pair of hands, the same weight of sins.
She could no longer look at flowers without seeing the bodies beneath them, without remembering how their fragrance never truly masked the stench of death. Sometimes, in the marketplace, the scent of fresh flowers twisted into something rancid, something rotten—as if the dead had never truly been buried, as if they were clawing their way back to whisper accusations in her ear, to blame her, to seek revenge—
Tainted. The flowers were tainted. Just like her.
#been reading isekai and royal theme manga all day in bed#the cramps has gotten better but i am still suffering#but brain is braining from all these cool artworks and story#the plotline is so good! but! they're! all! ongoing!!!!!!!! dammit!!!!#which is fine cuz then i'll try to find the english version of the korean novels but its hard to find#so#im stuck at bookmarking them and then start another#which is also on going#it's like i have a problem#LOL#royal au#[oc]Raven#knight!Raven#btw for royal au#later on she'll ofc carry out Viktor's order and assasinate others as well#and that's why she was placed in Price's army.#bcuz Raven was tasked to kill King!Price in the end.#huehue#had a whole story plot for the progression too but this doodle was so bad i figured i shouldnt ruin the idea LOL#some things are better left as imagination
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truly one of the worst ways james and sirius’ characters were butchered (both by canon and fanon) is the implication that they thought remus was the traitor or spy because he’s a werewolf.
those boys did not spend 3 YEARS becoming ANIMAGI and risking their body, mind, and soul, as well as courting azkaban just to turn around and give in to prejudice against creatures???? like yes, i realise war makes enemies of everyone and it heightens paranoia, suspicion etc etc but this is just the laziest of all reasons??? if they weren’t scared of remus in school, after watching him transform, and they still used the damn nicknames, then why would they suddenly think his furry little problem made him unreliable??
and at that!!!! what tf kind of sense does it make for them to believe that remus was the traitor and then…do absolutely nothing about it???? the whole bullshit only checks out if they all firmly believed each other. if they thought one of them was a spy for the DARK LORD, then why would they shut up about it??? both james and sirius clearly realised the war was about more than just them; they would not be hiding a potential spy if they knew about it.
this is honestly why the whole thing, and r/s reconciliation rubs me the wrong way. if they thought remus was untrustworthy, then give me a reliable reason other than him being a were. (i’ve got a few but none of them are ever used in fics). and even if they had some doubts about remus, it would still never make up for his belief that sirius betrayed the potters and joined the DEs. ever. that’s entirely a false equivalence.
#sirius black#james potter#i’ve been thinking ab this a lot lately#for FoD primarily#bc i’m trying to figure out where i wanna place remus#and this part just. doesn’t make sense to me?#like much as i hate it. u can make an argument for remus thinking sirius could’ve killed muggles bc of the whole pRaNk bullshit.#joining the dark is still too far fetched but okay. i’ll take it.#betraying the potters? never. but the prev two are still enough to cast doubts#what possible reason could j & s have to doubt remus tho??? we’ve never gotten anything#which honestly makes me think it’s another way to 1. butcher their characters and 2. equate sirius to remus#bc if sirius also thought r was a spy then it automatically makes it okay for the other way around also no?#ofc if anyone else has alternative theories i’d love to hear#im also sceptical how much of the werewolf packs come in here#bc it doesn’t do what many people think it does#bc if that’s what made j&s wary…then how is it different from werewolf prejudice??#pen’s yapping
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Something that always breaks my heart is how Seunghyun really struggled to accept his own identity. That’s what led to those long depressions and made him keep his distance from Jiyong… he just couldn’t accept his real self. Was scrolling through old blogs and found these two interviews. One from around 2011,( you can tell by his blonde hair and haircut), where he says he’s still going through an identity crisis. Then the next year, 2012, during the Fantastic Baby era, there’s this interview where he says: “Last year, it was a hard year for me. Emotionally.” And if I’m not wrong, that was also when GTOP had emotionally broken up too. (Not totally sure about the timeline tho.)
I just really hope he’s at peace with who he really is now.💔


a) Oh, the 2011 Secret Garden Parody remark was a joke. He was having an "identity crisis" about his sexuality since he had to kiss two boys (liar, you were already dating Ji).
b) The other interview, however, is pretty important. He also spoke about the weight of his persona, as well as how cautious, worried and perfectionist he was becoming, in either the same interview or an interview from about the same time. GTOP weren't emotionally broken up yet, we have some pretty good GTOP moments (but Tabi had been doing some VERY intense filming and had a lot of angsty thoughts and feelings within him, and by his own admission (in a different interview from a slightly different timeframe), he said that he shut a lot of people out because of this pent-up frustation from filming). I linked the interview where he spoke about this yesterday in the post where I tried to explain the Coup D'Etat-making era break-up.
In the same interview, he praises the GD&TOP album, so he probably wasn't emotionally done with Jiyong at all (and the fact that he says "something felt good" and in the past has spoken about his attachment to the GD&TOP album and how he put his heart into it... Yeh idk I feel like he was glad to have Ji with him).
c) It's okay, he turned out just fine. Here's an interview from 2022. He was on the edge of a depressive episode and/or was already having one ending 2012, so his words will ofc worry us all. But yeh, what you feel and say while you have depression isn't representative of what you truly feel about yourself, who you are and what you've achieved. You should read it, it's very positive (and gives me HOPE that we're gonna get an album like "After Hours", which is a clear STORYLINE, which is DOPE! Hopefully it's more positive tho). I explained more in tags fyi :D But in this interview he even said he’d say his younger self to “be more courageous”, which oddly warmed my heart. Cuz it takes acknowledgement and reflection of your actions to come to such a conclusion.
#emilysaittt#Dw our baby is doing SO much better than he did ending 2012-mid 2014#That wasn't the best time for him (often by own admission)#But by the time 2015-2016 rolled around he was doing better#Then beginning 2017 (before the scandal even mind you) was another painful time#And then ofc ending 2019-beginning 2020 was also confusing#Till we get to mid 2020 where everything *settles*#And I think he was temporarily shaken in beginning 2023 (especially cuz of his chaotic way of announcing that he left BB)#But he seemed to get better again and find settlement by the time he needs to film SG2.. working on projects with freedom really calms him#The same way 'Tazza' seemed to have calmed his soul down back then as well#I think (and maybe this is an “anecdotal (?)” feeling since I have similar issues as Tabi) he's in a slightly more peaceful place rn?#Since his identity isn't being shaken anymore it's more so about the current settlement of his soul rather than who he is as a person#Idk if I'm explaining myself correctly lulz but what I'm trying to say is that these old interviews aren't reflective of how Tabi feels now#Since he was genuinely struggling at the time (by that I mean that I agree).. honestly reading R.O.D’s lyrics is very interesting#With this interpretation of Tabi in mind#I haven't properly read the January 2025 interviews (since I get upset when I encounter stuff that's too sad) but he seemed PENSIVE#Which isn't immediately a bad thing imho because being pensive doesn't immediately he's sad.. CUZ LOOK HOW HAPPY HE WAS IN 2022!!#GD&TOP were both SOOOO happy in 2022 I can't say it enough!! So SO happy!! So yeh just trust Seunghyun ig?#Also he has the world's best husband :D
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Between commissions I finally managed to finish this OC set of parent characters! If the looks aren't enough to show you who their kid is, the background colors match them ^_^ but of course more details below!
Name: Thuban
Name origin: The former pole star, before the north star (Polaris), it's name means "Large snake" and is referred to as the “Dragon's tail”
Pronouns: He/him
Age: N/A
Relation: Raised Polaris, though they're not related by blood and have a somewhat distant relationship, until he suddenly went MIA
Weapon: Spear (Same as Polaris's)
Ethos (Power): N/A
Flaw power is based on: N/A
Notes: Make no phallic jokes about the large snake thing and you'll be rewarded
Name: Ananke
Name origin: A moon of Jupiter, named for the mythological spirit of necessity, inevitably, and compulsion
Pronouns: She/her
Age: -
Relation: Bella's mother, she raised her to be a warrior
Weapon: Bardiche
Ethos (Power): Indomination (The ability to freeze the movement of objects and people, and lock them in place)
Flaw power is based on: Her strict enforcement of obedience through authoritarianism, and a lack of concern for the wishes of others
Notes: She believes in tough love. It's better in the long run to give your kid strength rather than affection.
Name: Rhea
Name origin: A moon of Saturn named after the Titan known as the mother of the gods
Pronouns: She/her
Age: 38
Relation: Saiph's mother, though she gave him up to the guild when he was very young
Weapon: None
Ethos (Power): None
Flaw power is based on: N/A
Notes: Was unable to take care of a baby at the time, and gave Saiph to the guild. She wishes she'd visited beyond that but it's probably too late now...
Name: Arche
Name origin: One of Jupiter's moons, it's name comes from the muse of new beginnings and is associated with springtime
Pronouns: He/him
Age: 7
Relation: Saiph's half-brother. Neither currently knows the other exists
Weapon: None
Ethos (Power): None
Flaw power is based on: N/A
Notes: He's just a little guy. He likes flowers and playing with toys. He wants to be a cool hero like his dad
Name: Poerava
Name origin: A star in Tucana, the Maori word for a black pearl of mystical beauty and perfection
Pronouns: She/her
Age: -
Relation: Al's mom. She mostly raised him on her own while her husband was with the knights.
Weapon: None
Ethos (Power): None
Flaw power is based on: N/A
Notes: Probably the best parent of the bunch if we're being real.
#Finn's ocs#Finn's art#oc references#i wrote the descs while w the kids so hopefully they make sense. my attention was split#but anyway here in the tags I'll talk about the designs in relation to their kids lol#polaris is emulating thuban moreso than anyone else. her color scheme and outfit motifs are the same as his- they ARE his#her original outfit is clothes she took and diy'd into her own so she could go off into the world and well presumably look for him at first#the truth is she always wanted to see the world that's why she loved maps. in a way this was an excuse. in another way she was just lonely#but doesn't understand loneliness. also the fact that she's not his daughter by blood is part of that#bc of her actual parents (not as relevant character-wise) she sees all relationships as temporary and she has issues connecting#ananke i wanted to mostly look intimidating in a way that Bella really isn't#Bella puts on skull hairties and fishnets and stuff but she's very much. a cute softie trying to look edgy. she has pink twintails#she's so different from her mom in pretty much every way but she still did have that ideal of strength drilled into her#still her take on it is softer. she's the team leader now but she's really pretty lenient aside from the important No Killing rule ofc#w Rhea and Arche i had a bit of a flower theme. pussywillow (lol) means motherhood and buttercups mean childishness#so. mother and child#but rhea is interesting bc she's raising a whole different kid now that she's in a different place in life#if you do the math she had Saiph young. and it was alright for a while until his dad (again not as important) died#so she didn't have support or money. but she had a connection to the guild because his dad's old sword teacher is a member (hmm)#but she was too scared/ashamed to visit. she just left him his dad's old knife because that's all she had (THE KNIFE IS IMPORTANT)#arche is her kid with her second husband and her new beginning. this will cause some inner problems for Saiph when he meets them...#Poerava was kinda designed to have rich lady vibes because remember Al's family is practically nobility#but more importantly she's designed to look like a mom. with the low ponytail and tired eyes#the black pearl of her namesake as the centerpiece of her outfit too#again she's got the healthiest relationship with her kid here by a longshot#but i mean don't worry Al still got the daddy issues so he's not getting away unscathed#I already drew Taurus with the zodiac knights though so i didn't feel the need to reintroduce him#anyway Mira really has 0 connection to any family at all she was found as an orphaned baby after a monster attack#obviously she had parents but beyond town of origin it's unknown who so she has no connections to any sort of past parental figure#the guild is her one and only family and that's how she wants it. she wants to be with them forever the past doesn't matter
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#alnst spoilers#and me being a mean man-hating lesbian (/j). sorry#sorry i literally cant even be happy abt till alive because the fans have been SO annoying about it#i.vtl shippers are some of the most obnoxious on the planet like. they make me truly hate the ship sometimes#/nbh ofc#like why r you talking abt them and bringing them up when it's Not About Them#why was IVAN trending after the MIZI comic that he WASNT EVEN IN#and dont get me started on the ridiculous top/bottom discourse. harassing a fanweek blog into saying no switch#only to go create ANOTHER no switch fanweek? even though the problem in the first place was that ti.llvan 'got two weeks'??#'king yaoi the third' i literally dont care i'll kill both of them with my bare hands atp#alnst isn't about the yaoi. youre all missing the point#anyway. congrats to all the normal iv.tl shippers. sorry about your fellow ship fans#<- truthfully i DO like iv.tl and both characters. but the fandom has greatly dampened my enjoyment of them unfortunately
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revamped my kofi mostly because i want a place where i can post my art advice posts btw!
#not art#ofc there's no pressure to donate anything!!#i'm hoping it's just set up that anyone can read the posts and dont have to donate#havent even looked at my kofi in like over 2 yrs pfft#but that's ok cos no one else has either but yeh#i rly just want another record of my art advice posts and this seems like the best place atm?
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Girl who has only been listening to three bands recently makes an OC
#kinda messy but finally got the pictures in my head out#there's this whole storyline I have about these two characters#one of which is he descendent of another character#who was in a relationship with an actual character who has a real story they're a part of#I've decided for all my stories to take place in the same world#anyway this will probably never become anything#basically she touches this star of indeterminate name#and sees these crazy truths of the universe learns things she never dreamed#and is left with so much knowledge crowding her brain#but the things he really wanted to know (where his parent left to what the end to the war will look like)#she doesn't get#so basically fundamentally irreversibly changed he is just consumed by this hunt to find the star again#the star leaves its mark as well leaving his appearance in that in between state#eventually she finds the star again and is granted this like terrible ominscence her former self completely erased#the god who sent the star sees this knowledge as a gift but really obv it's a curse and tears her close relationship apart#that's basically what the story is sad gays ofc bc it's based off cshr#this world is full of meddling gods and situations such as this#which is how the original original character ended up so messed up#yipee#kestrel calls#chitter chatter#mostly I just needed a character to think about when I listen to this music#so I just made some#kestrel doodles#undescribed
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my gaang ship rank according to this
1.) zukaang
2.) toko
3.) kataang
4.) tokka
5.) katoph
6.) sukka
7.) suki/toph
8.) zutara
9.) sukitara
10.) ta//ang
11.) zu//kka
#i only really care about zukaang ofc#i approve of zukaang to sukitara#toko to sukka is kind of up in the air as of an actual ranking. they all in 2nd place lets say#and tbh zu//kka is my lowest bc not only do i hate the ship but i hate the fandom for it too#if i see another ao3 character study fic about zuko's trauma but then there is an ooc sokka forced in im going to scream#ta//ang is okay but i think they're personalities together in a romantic situation doesn't really work at all#in my humble opinion#toko has grown on me...i feel like they can bond over so much
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it sure has been quite a week
#g o d this week was such a mess™️#i kicked off the week wrong (as always) with ~3h of sleep bc i can never fall asleep on monday nights (sadge)#and ofc i had to do 2 workstations’ worth of work bc lack of manpower lmao#then on tuesday i had yet another family dinner to say goodbye to my bro (lol)#even though he’d already been treated to at least 3 other meals by that point (lmao)#i still think my dinner treat from a few weeks back was the best though~~~~~~ a 4 course sky dining meal def tops any restaurant right~~~~~?#and on suiyoubi (my dudes) we boated him off to military training island for his mandatory enlistment. that sure was. an experience.#i still kinda regret finishing my meal at the military cafeteria place thing though… i was the only one at the table who finished it :(#even my big eater of a bro couldn’t finish his :(#and my mother has been making fun of me for finishing the (allegedly) huge portioned meal ever since :(#she keeps joking about enlisting me bc army food ✨clearly✨ suits my tastes :( truly sadded.#anyways it was back to work on thursday. which sucked. ofc. also bc i’d overslept by half an hour and had to rush. lmao.#anddddd on friday. my boss told me that i’d missed out on submitting one worksheet thing of results#even though i c l e a r l y remember doing the test it was for (and organising all of the worksheet things for the matter)#so my coworker and i just watched her sift through the stack of worksheets… only for her to actually find the ‘missing’ piece of paper#she then said ‘ok found it sorry’ so my coworker and i just went ‘(ʘ‿ʘ) okayyyyyyyyyy’ p. sarcastically and left her office#and ofccccc there was work on saturday too. yay. went to the pkm centre after that thoughhhh#which was fun yes. but. they didn’t have ✨c h a i r d e o x y s✨ on sale :(((((#they stopped selling goomy earrings and that huge plush too :( and the smaller goomy plushies for the matter :((((#i realllyyy should’ve bought the goomy earrings while they were still available… even though they were like 8 bucks per stud#my goomy plushie collection remains unexpanded :( my jigglypuff collection grew by 1 though~~~~#so now i have 3 official jigglies of varying sizes and 1 bootleg jiggly that looks. pretty horrifying in bad lighting actually#p. sadded by how my family calls my taste in pkm boring though… ‘it’s either jigglypuff or that purple thing’ they say… :((((#aaaaaa i wish i could’ve bought that super cute plush of goodra holding a happily smiling goomy i saw on my trip…#it’s too bad that the plushies (there were like 2-3 of them) were locked inside a display cabinet :(((( it was so cuteeeeeeeee#though my fam would’ve made me put it back if i’d even managed to get it out back then lol. ‘that purple thing again?!’ they’d prolly say…#anyways. this sure was a week. im so tired. help#no clue how i should spend the rest of my night tbh… maybe beach sisters time? hmmmmmm. oh wells.#‘dai’ly shitpost of the day
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qBad this, qForever that, when did everyone forget about unreliable narrators?
#like listen. alright. bbh I get it. but the feeling he’s feeling of being soooo targeted and that the system is already corrupt is like#he’s taking it incredibly personal yknow? and I respect it. I also agree with his general view of not wanting leadership w federation backin#In the first place yknow? but like everyone look at me and level with me. qBbh is such a hypocrite and I won’t hear another word of it ofjsj#qBad apologists I see it I get it but like. to say everyone has had this coming and bad is treated so poorly on the server like??#have any of you seen half the stuff bad pulls? have any of you met foolish even entirely unrelated to bad??? y’all are acting like bads -#- getting the foolish treatment rn. which is how qBad is feeling! but guys! unreliable narrator come on now!!!#and the thing about qBad is that he is all about pushing other people’s buttons but when it comes to him? he can’t always handle it. there#are exceptions to this rule ofc but he can be quick to react. if this was a rule specific about say foolish?#or Roier even? Cellbit? bad would jump on the chance for the ‘meme’#he’s aggravated about the presidential position in the first place and is feeling targeted and is going 0-100#which is the classic qBad and I respect that! it makes him a fun character! hes just an unreliable narrator and we all gotta remember that#idk man#Cellbit’s convo with him about the electoral process really shows that if you were watching one of their POV’s#the chair bit was salt in the wound to be clear and funny as hell but everything else#I dunno I just have been seeing a bunch of takes that are like I get it I see your passion. but qBad isn’t this saint you make him out to be#anyways I cannot wait to see what comes of this ✌️#edit: forever isn’t immune to this either btw! but he’s trying at least#mcyt#qsmp#bbh#q!forever#z speaks
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underrated pleasures: bonding with complete strangers
#just befriended a kid at the buffet who was looking for cheese wontons (mood)#but this place has none so i got to introduce them to the delight of the humble crab ragoon#then they swing by the fruit bar and recommended a kind of orange thing(?) which was delish!#then bump into one another in the ice cream section and start cracking jokes about it#they just left with their adult with a dramatic salute and bow my way so ofc i had to return the favor#their adult is laughing and waves#my afternoon is made ♡#shut up ace
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Recently tried a lot of foods I've been wanting to try for months/years, and between trying matcha for the first time, eating ferrero rocher, and more, this has proved to be an excellent lesson in de-influencing
#where to start#matcha just tastes like green tea#like...ofc it does#but the fact that ppl put matcha in everything (matcha cookies matcha brownies...etc)#and usually coffee places like where I got my matcha from add different stuff to their matchas#like theres this one place on tiktok that has a banana pudding matcha drink that I still want to try#I expected matcha to taste...idk richer and deeper than just regular green tea#but it doesn't#it just tastes like regular green tea#granted I know the workers at dutch bros didn't use ceremonial grade matcha powder#but I don't care for tea that much#and I've never really liked the taste of green tea#so this is my lesson to not believe every foul mouthed influencer I see online#I have seen ppl putting teabags in their oatmeal and combining different tea bags#I know how good green tea is for your body so I can totally imagine combining green tea with my earl grey#for maximum taste and benefits#I saw that one of the grocery chains has been selling dubai chocolate bars for $5 so I wanted to try it#but I couldn't find it :(#dubai chocolate has been popular for over a year now but I still haven't tried it#and it's like the most trendy item rn besides matcha#of well another day#ferrero rocher doesn't taste to bad#growing up I always thought of it as the rich ppl candy#bc it's so expensive and we sometimes give them as gifts#tried it for the first time and it's alright#the hazelnut spread or whatever reminds me of nutella#and I love nutella#so next time I'll probably just get nutella#or better yet I watched this yt vid the other day where this woman makes nutella from scratch#and according to her it tastes more like hazelnuts
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I hate deeling so stupid for something I cant control
#there was a spider on me and i froze up and then flipped out and now i cant dind it#i had joe come to kill it but its gone now and im not sure if it was a hallucinations or not#my hallucination spiders dont usually look like that and arent usually on me#but i have no way of knowing if it was real and idk where it went and now im just terrified#and ofc joe is mad bc he has work in the morning and needs sleep#but i wont feel better until i either see a dead spider or i can get myself to belief it wasnt real#which again im not sure bc it was different from my usual hallucinations#amd tberes like a million places where it could be hiding if it wxists at all#for all i know it wasnt even a spider it couls have been a bug or something i dont know but it freaked me put#and theres no way im getting to sleep any time soon now i cant stop crying#i thought i had mayeb trapped it under my phone (it was on my hand when i saw it)#but its not there. no body or anything#its at least not in my comfort object where i was scared it was#i wish i could just kill them but i cant i just freak out and jump. i might have thrown the fucking thing#IF ITS EVEN REAL AND I HAVE NO WAY TO KNOW UNLESS IT SHOWS UP AGAIN#my spider hallucinations are usually only as im waking up though which is another thing
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