#(// Finals is coming up. I hope I survive to be able to really answer your asks😭)

[the-universes-favorite-ragdoll]

Sorry for the lack of updates, guys. I got a job, unfortunately.

I don't even get paid, just something about responsibility, something something, and takign accountability for my actions, blablabla. aaaaaaauuugghhhh get me out of here

[organic-bloodbath]

Please, forgive me (i love you) - Part 2

Thanos x Reader

Summary: The final game is here and Thanos' priority is to get you and your baby out of the games alive.

Part 1

A/N: Writing an epilogue so y'all not asking for part 3 i have too many requests waiting in my inbox lmao. This was really fun to write tho <3 Hope y'all enjoy it too.

☆☆☆

You and Jun-hee with your babies, Thanos, Gi-hun, Myung-gi, player 100, Min-su and Nam-gyu were the finalists, the players who had survived to play the final game. The last game before you’d be able to go back home — if you lived, that was.

Right now, you were about to eat a special dinner as a celebration of your ability to progress this far in the games. Surviving all the way to this point. And god damn, the food actually looked delicious and you could eat however much you wanted.

You almost felt like an inmate eating their last meal before getting executed on death row.

Before you were about to sit down at the table, Thanos approached you, dressed up in a black suit like everyone else, including you. You didn’t think you’d ever seen him in a suit this clean and fancy, but it certainly looked good on him.

"Damn, señorita," Thanos gasped as he looked at you from head to toe, his gaze hungry and smile wide. "I already know you look good in a dress but in a suit? Hot. So, so sexy."

"What have i told you about calling me 'señorita'?" you sighed, the nickname annoying you – and Thanos knew that very well.

"Sorry, sorry," Thanos quickly apologized and lifted his hands in the air as a surrender for a second, until resting his palm against his heart. He took a step closer to you, invading your personal space. "Sweetheart. Mother of my child. Mama–"

"Do not say mamacita," you spat.

"You mami, me papi," Thanos smirked, pointing first at you and then at himself, following a wink.

You crossed your arms against your chest. "You want me to call you papi now?"

"Baby you can call me whatever you want," Thanos said and put his finger under your chin. You pushed his hand away from you.

After the dinner, you went back to your bed to get yourself some privacy as you fed your baby as well, out of the sight of others. Thanos disappeared somewhere, probably to go to the bathroom.

Then, Nam-gyu approached you as you were just finished with feeding your baby. You furrowed your eyebrows, searching for Thanos around the room. When you didn't see him, you looked back at Nam-gyu.

"What do you want?" you asked, a little too coldly. Nam-gyu had pissed you off since day one, you had no urge to get friendly with him now either.

"Just came to see your baby," Nam-gyu smirked and leaned in to take a closer look on her but you put more distance between the two of you. "Come on, i just wanna see how much she resembles Thanos."

"Oi, Nam-su," Thanos called from the distance, his steps coming closer to you. Thank fucking god. "I go to take a piss for a second and you're already bothering my girl, huh?"

"I just came to say hi," Nam-gyu answered, smiling innocently, but you could notice the way his jaw clenched for the name.

"Yeah? Well she doesn't wanna talk to you," Thanos said and crossed his arms.

“I think she can talk for herself,” you stated.

“Yeah? You wanna talk to this little shit?” Thanos asked, raising his eyebrows.

“No thanks,” you huffed and stood up, the baby in your arms. You shook your head and left the two guys to argue by themselves, heading towards Gi-hun to see how he was doing, sitting on his bed by himself.

When you were gone, Nam-gyu pulled Thanos slightly more to the side, making sure they were far enough from you that you couldn't hear what they were talking about.

“Alright, give me another pill,” Nam-gyu insisted.

“Nah, think I’ve given you enough,” Thanos stated, becoming annoyed how Nam-gyu was constantly begging him for drugs. Should have brought his own here if he was that desperate for fuck’s sake.

"Come on, man," Nam-gyu groaned, his hands shaking. "I know you have more, give me one pill, just one."

"I don't have them anymore, alright," Thanos said strictly.

Nam-gyu looked at him dumbfounded and shocked, starting to panic Surely he had heard him wrong. "What the fuck do you mean you don't have any? Jesus fucking christ, i need more.”

"You being an addict isn't my fucking problem," Thanos gritted through his teeth. "Should have brought your own if you're that desperate."

Nam-gyu grabbed Thanos by his sleeve, pulling him back towards himself when Thanos was about to leave. "Thanos, please –"

Thanos didn't even let him finish his sentence, pushing Nam-gyu harshly on the floor.

"I said," Thanos repeated. "I don't fucking have any."

Thanos needed drugs too, he had to admit it to himself – he craved for a pill. But he had to ignore that feeling and concentrate on what was more important: you.

Thanos turned his head back towards you, chatting with Gi-hun, smile spread on your face. Giggling at something the old man said to you. God, how much Thanos wished you'd smile like that to him too some day. He missed your smile and laugh so, so much.

Thanos spared one last glance at Nam-gyu, who was shaking and pulling his hair still on the floor, then walked back to sit on his own bed. His leg bounced up and down, sweat rising on his forehead.

Around half an hour later, you approached Thanos and sat next to him, who was still sitting on the same position, leg bouncing. He had been deep in his thoughts, the memories with you coming back to him. How you first met, your first date, first kiss… and the last time you had slept together, which resulted to the child you had birthed here. But all the fights covered the good moments together, all the shouting and objects thrown against the wall…

"Everything alright?" you asked, putting your hand on his knee to make his leg relax.

"Yeah, no problem," Thanos mumbled.

Both of you sat in silence for a while, neither of you knowing what to say, how to break the silence. You had so much unsaid things between the two of you that would have needed solving but you didn’t know how to bring them up. You didn’t want to. Neither did he.

"Can i… can i hold her?" Thanos finally asked. He had held her only once and that had been during the jump rope game. He had proved to you that he was very well able to hold a baby but you were still hesitant to let him handle her. Were mothers just automatically overprotective of their children and didn't feel comfortable others touching them? Or was it just Thanos you weren't sure to trust just yet? You couldn't be sure, perhaps both.

You ended up handing her over to Thanos who handled her again like her bones were glass.

A week ago Thanos' life was just about drugs and music while being drowned in debts and mind even spiraling in suicidal thoughts. He couldn't have imagined how things could change so fast to something completely different. If he'd get out of here alive, along with you, he would be able to pay his debts and he'd have a new reason to live again, a reason to quit drugs and get his life together – you and your daughter. His daughter. The child you and him created.

"Y/N," Thanos said quietly, getting your attention. "Why didn't you call me? Tell me about the pregnancy?"

You were silent for a moment, building the answer inside your head before answering. "I didn't think you'd care."

"The hell you mean i wouldn't care?" Thanos asked, sounding offended.

"You hadn't exactly paid attention on me, I felt like you didn’t care about me. It was all just about rapping and drugs and i just," you started, not sure how to continue. “I just wanted nothing to do with you anymore.”

Your words and the fragile tone of your voice, the way you avoided eye contact with him, broke his heart. Thanos hadn’t realized how shitty he had been towards you, but now thinking back, he had truly messed up.

“I promise I’ll change. For you,” he said.

You could see that he meant that but wasn’t confident that he’d be able to keep his promise when you’d actually get out of here and settle down to your normal life again as if nothing had happened. You didn’t say that out loud, only turned your head away from him. He had disappointed you so many times. Sure, now you had a baby together but it didn’t automatically mean that he’d be a changed man.

He’d change for the baby, not for you. That’s what you felt like it to be.

☆☆☆

The final game started the next day. You were so, so close to the end, you couldn’t die now. The rules were simple: you had to choose to kill three people among you. So, one player on each pillar. The thought alone made you sick, but whatever to entertain the VIPs, you assumed. If the rules were followed and only three were to be eliminated, five of you would walk free, but you weren’t confident of that happening; there would definitely be more death victims.

“I’ll protect you, don’t worry,” Thanos whispered to you, holding your cheek with his hand. “I won’t let anyone push you off the pillar, got it?”

You just nodded your head.

All the players were now standing on the first pillar, trapped extremely high from the ground. You’d only have to push someone off the pillar and they’d die by hitting the ground. Before you had only voted whether you wanted to leave or stay playing the games, but now you were about to vote who you wanted dead.

Whoever came up with these games had something very, very wrong in their head.

The first round seemed to be easy, even though deciding who should die would never be easy. Not in the real word — this didn’t feel like a part of the real world. It was a separate world which you previously knew, here there weren’t any rules or morals.

Everyone seemed to agree that the player 100 should go down and that’s exactly what Nam-gyu ended up doing: pushed him off the pillar with the metal pipe.

First round, finished. Seven players left.

This round was a little more difficult, since you had personally become more familiar with each person around you — some much more than others.

Gi-hun, Jun-hee and Thanos were definitely out of question. You didn’t know Min-su well, he barely talked to anyone except Se-mi, but he seemed like an honest and kind kid. Nam-gyu, on the other hand, was a complete asshole and had even killed people for fun and for the greed of more money to him. Although, you weren’t sure how close he had become with Thanos. Would Thanos care about him dying?

The arguing and shouting who should die was making you lose your mind, Nam-gyu, Myung-gi and Thanos doing most of the shouting. The time was running down second by second with each word.

Then, Nam-gyu approached Min-su, making him back towards the edge of the pillar, afraid what Nam-gyu was going to do to him. Min-su and Nam-gyu were now standing face to face in front of each other.

“Now, maybe you should be the one we’ll eliminate, hm?” Nam-gyu thought out loud. “That way you could finally get back to the bitch you called your friend. Se-mi, was it? Don’t you want to be with her, hm? You could bond over the fact that i killed both of you.”

You could see the anger starting to boil inside Min-su, his fists tightening and jaw clenching. Nam-gyu only found it hilarious, laughing at his face. That was it. The breaking point.

Min-su grabbed Nam-gyu’s shirt, switching places with him so that Nam-gyu was now the one to stand at the edge and ready to fall down.

“What the fu—“

But Nam-gyu wasn’t able to finish his sentence, because right then, without another thought, Min-su pushed Nam-gyu off the edge, sending him to his death. However, before Nam-gyu fell, he managed to grab Min-su by his leg, taking him with him.

If Nam-gyu was about to go down, apparently so was Min-su who was now holding on the edge with his hands. Min-su wasn’t very strong, so it didn’t take longer than a few seconds for his fingers to slip and make them both hit the floor — their corpses lying on the ground next to each other.

All of you stood still on the pillar, shocked at what had just happened, not having expected that sort of result. Thanos walked to the edge to look down where his ‘friend’ was lying on a pool of blood, but you didn’t want to take a single look at them.

Second round, finished. Five players left. You, Thanos, Jun-hee, Gi-hun and Myung-gi.

One of you had to die. But apparently Myung-gi had already decided that he wasn’t the one to die today, instantly grabbing the long metal pipe ready to push one of the four players down. Although, basically three; he and everyone else knew he wouldn’t harm Jun-hee like that.

Myung-gi was angry especially at Gi-hun. Why the hell had he become so close to Jun-hee and daring to carry her baby instead of the baby's real dad? Was Gi-hun trying to be some sort of a father figure to him? The thought of it made Myung-gi absolutely furious, boiling inside.

Myung-gi and Gi-hun ended up fighting, which eventually resulted to the same situation as with Nam-gyu and Minsu: Gi-hun holding the edge of the pillar with his hands, Myung-gi having a firm grip on his leg. Gi-hun was definitely stronger than Min-su, so he managed to stay there a little longer.

Thanos glanced at you, looking at the situation completely horrified but of course you weren’t strong enough to help him; he’d only unintentionally pull you down with him. Thanos had seen you spend time with Gi-hun between the games. He could tell you enjoyed his company, though Thanos didn’t understand why the hell you cared to hang out with an old man like him.

Eventually, Thanos ran towards Gi-hun to help him back up. Did he do that for simply the good of his heart or because you’d be proud of him playing the hero of the day? Probably the last option.

“Come on, man. Kick him off and take my hand, I’ll pull you up,” Thanos said, quiet enough that the others behind him didn’t hear.

Then, you realized something horrifying and your eyes widened.

Nobody had pressed the button. You ran quickly to the center of the pillar and pressed your foot hard on the red button, turning it green.

Round three has started.

Just a few seconds later, you heard a noise of Myung-gi’s body hitting the ground. After a little bit of a struggle, Thanos managed to get Gi-hun back up to stand on his own two feet.

Congratulations. You have now passed the game.

You, Jun-hee, Gi-hun and Thanos were the winners of the games, along with two babies. Out of 456 people, 4 of them would walk out of there free and alive — and you were one of them. You. You and your baby, along with your baby’s dad.

Thanos rushed to you and instantly cupped your face with his hands.

“I really, really want to kiss you right now,” he whispered, looking directly into your eyes and waiting for the permission.

You glanced at his lips and was the one to close the gap between the two of you, lips pressing against each other. The kiss was soft and slow, loving almost, careful. Thanos was afraid you’d back off if he kissed you too hard — it was completely opposite how Thanos had usually kissed you.

“I love you,” Thanos whispered.

You didn’t say it back, but Thanos didn’t expect an answer. He’d make sure to treat you well so that some day you’d be able to say it to him again. You’d be able to love him again, the way he would love you from now on. Cherish you and your kid together.

“Let’s go home, yeah?”

☆☆☆

EPILOGUE

10 years later

In-ho was sitting at a bench in a park, enjoying the summer weather, the sun high up in the cloudless sky.

Then, he saw someone familiar in the distance. Someone who he hadn’t seen in almost a decade.

You, along with a small girl who resembled you awfully lot.

He looked at the two of you for a while, seeing how you had changed throughout these years. There wasn't that much of a change but you looked... happy. Smile wide on your face you sent your daughter to go play football with her friends.

The last time In-ho had seen you was a little while after the games when you had been brought back here from the island. He had visited you once after a few weeks to see how you were doing, though not approaching you, not letting you notice him. In-ho had gone to see each of the winners: Gi-hun, Jun-hee and Thanos as well. Looking at them from the distance. Only once, then he had left you alone for good.

Until now seeing you again. All the memories of the deadly childhood games were coming back to his mind. Memories he hadn't thought about in years.

In-ho was so deep in his thoughts that he hadn’t even realized how a ball had hit his ankle. The same girl In-ho had looked at just a moment ago came to take the ball back to her.

“I’m sorry, sir. I didn’t mean to kick the ball towards you,” she apologized, looking embarrassed.

“It��s alright,” he said, a small smile on his face.

The girl looked at him for a moment, wondering if she should say something again to make sure In-ho wasn’t mad at her for disrespecting elders like that. But then she decided to just leave back to her friends who she was playing football with in the middle of the park.

The last time she saw her was when she was just a newborn baby wrapped in the green jacket with your number.

In-ho looked back towards you, now with a man who In-ho quickly recognized as well, even though he didn’t have his purple hair anymore. Choi Su-bong pressed a kiss on your cheek and put his arm around you, saying something to you but of course In-ho couldn’t hear the conversation this far.

In-ho had liked you since the beginning, you were a naturally likable person, and he was glad that you had been one of the winners, living your life with a happy smile.

☆☆☆

[irlyluvosamu]

Hi hun, could you maybe do either a gender neutral or female reader that pretends to be dumb but is actually hyper intelligent? Like the reader would do this to maybe protect themselves from being used by people for their smarts. Any characters would be cool 😎 pp gang out

synopsis; reader pretends to be dumb, but is actually smarter than they act out to be.

featuring: dazai, chuuya, atsushi, and ranpo

a/n: LOOK—WRITING GUYS, AND OF COURSE I ADDED DAZAI BECAUSE IM OBSESSED.

before you read/warnings: lowercase writing, not proof-read

DAZAI finds you intriguing. you act as a child when they just learned how to count to ten. you seem to be oblivious when he speaks to you, he uses this for his entertainment.

speaks to you in riddles just to see your confused puppy face. always brushing it off with a "nevermind that, how was your day, love?"

alas, your little act didn't go on for long with him as much as you hoped it would. he caught on within a day—only pretending to believe you to see how long you go on with this silly little lie of yours.

he would drop puzzles into your guys conversations, throw some theories in your face just for fun, and use big words you may or may not have actually heard of before.

sure enough, his little experiment worked and your poker face surely cracked here and there. a too-fast correction. a twitch in they eye when he says something incredibly stupid. and your eyes? well, you can't dull the sharpness out of them forever.

and that's when dazai confronts you finally—but not in a hostile way. he would have you both in a secluded space, maybe once you both have finished your papers—and buy "both" i mean "you"—and everyone in the office has stepped out.

he would smile at you—knowing he read you like a book without you ever knowing.

"well aren't you just a cute little genius, hmm? what wasn't smart was you thinking you can keep up that act with me," you sighed at his teasing voice.

"want to tell me why you decided to lie, or shall i crack that case as well?"

you opened up about this being a way for you to protect yourself from being using you for your smarts—as people would only speak to you like your walking google.

bracing for the teasing; dazai said something that shattered your brown completely—"it's okay, 'bella. i know what it's like to hide you are to survive."

CHUUYA doesn't know how to react to you at first. he's met people in the mafia who are slow, a bit of a dunce, but you just took his brain cells away. hates to admit it, but your cute, cute as hell. which is why he's with you. you're a little bit clumsy and a bit slow when it comes to taking orders.

he would open jars for you, answer your questions after a meeting with the boss, and caught onto your "confused" looks and simply sighed before slowly explaining the situation to you.

you make him feel more of the sharp one around you.

he tries not to lose his patience, in front of you at least, however poor akutagawa and tachihara had to endure countless moments of chuuya tweak out about you. he also tweaks out how adorable you are when you ask him for support, like when you told him how much you loved clouds—besides them making mean, scary faces at you an they are too high up in the sky for you to "show them a lesson." fucking adorable, your adorable! just really knows how to push his buttons.

then came a mission-a mission that has blown your little secret. the two of you were assigned to interrogate with some shady clients who were caught sneaking around of the port mafias secluded areas. chuuya couldn't get any information out of them, no matter the torture methods he used against them. until they started to confess in a coded language—something their gang must only be able to understand because he's never heard this language before in his life.

he tossed a chair to the wall close to the hostages; about to just kill them until you replied to one of the gang members in the same language. same pronunciation and fluency—their faces growing cold when they realized you could understand what they were saying.

chuuya stared at you while you spoke with the hostages as if you had grown a second head.

you ended up being the one to get this mission to be another successful one for the mafia; and that's when chuuya confronted you.

"what hell was that back at the interrogation?"

"what was what?"

"the fucking you suddenly knowing how speak a whole new language!? what the hell are you not telling me?"

oh. well. guess the cats out of the bag. you explained to him that you were scared the port mafia would eventually start to use you as some kind of object, knowing you were as smart as they think you are.

what pissed chuuya off the most was you thinking he would just use you for your smarts and leave once he got bored.

you expected him to be a tad bit upset, however this was something even your smart couldn't think would happen. "if you think i was ever going to use you, then maybe your not as smart as you think, doll. show off how fucking smart you are, you could get on mori's really good side and hell maybe even get promoted to a higher rank."

ATSUSHI fully believed your act. poor boy actually thought you were just really slow and took longer to understand certain things.

he sees you get all spacey—and has never once ever made fun of you or called you out. he would always give you the biggest smile and help you out.

that's what you liked about him. how he never expected anything from you and would give you room to breathe.

he would stick up for you when others would call you out, "hey—leave them alone, talk to me if you have any problems!"

he will never take anyone mocking you or calling you stupid when they don't even know you. and if it was someone from the agency, atsushi will honestly get even more aggressive towards you.

he wants you to know there's nothing wrong with you. and there's nothing wrong with being a bit slow, but if you try to get better; which is what he tries to help you with, that's all that matters!

you honestly start to feel bad keeping this lie from him for so long—he genuinely believes you and you feel so guilty..

"atsushi..can i talk to you for a moment?" you voice soft and gentle.

"of course, y/n!"

you and him took a step out of the office, making sure it was only you and him before you confessed your lie.

there's a silence that was oddly loud in your ear; not knowing how he would react. would he actually get really mad at you for lying, did he want to break up with you now?

suddenly he took your arms and pulled you close to him, his voice gentle and calm when he asked—"why do you feel the need to hide this side of you from me. you know i love you, i would never use you or treat you any different! and if anyone does, then they'll wish they just kept their mouths shut."

RANPO clocked you in about 0.2 seconds. of course he didn't out you right away, he played along with this little act of yours. seeing how long it will take for you to know he caught on.

he is a lot like dazai in this scenario; loves watching you squirm each time he gets close to exposing you to other people. he would get you to solve some tricky questions to help solve a case the agency would be doing, or purposefully say something so wrong—even the agency members started to grow suspicious.

you were smart-smart, not just logical—strategic, emotionally intelligent, and observant. loved that about you, he just knows you and him would click instantly if you had just out- right told him!

when the two of you were in private, maybe it's just you and him in the office. you are finishing writing reports and he's munchy some candy. that's when he decided to speak up, cornering you like a cat with its favorite toy.

you were smart enough to not act stupid anymore, sighing and putting the pen down. you dropped the bomb, telling him why you hide yourself from the public, scared they would use you.

"you know, it's cute how you can think you can lie to the world's greatest detective! i have to say i admire your act!"

@ ɪʀʟʏʟᴜᴠᴏꜱᴀᴍᴜ — 2 0 2 5

[redamoureux]

Can i request some tf2 headcanons of some of the mercenary boys (it can be anyone i dont mind and i honestly have a hard time pick also i dont know if you have a character limit)developing a crush on someone from the enemy team(reader), who found the respective merc injured in a corner, and instead of finishing them off they hand the merc a nearby health kit and just tell them to be safe before running away. Hopefully that's something you'll do and thanks for letting me request! I really like your writing style and your little art doodles are always a pleasure to see!! Thanks again byebye hope you have a good day!

╰﹒ARE YOU FALLING IN LOVE?

General Red/Blu Engineer, Sniper, Spy headcanons/short

• genre: romantic

• a/n: Hey! Sorry for the super late answer- this was just kinda stuck in my draft so sorry for that! ( >_<) Also, glad to hear you enjoy my doodles :) also i like your idea, it actually reminds me alot of how i potray my verison of reader so that may have made me a little carried away while writing this- And yeah, i apologize if my rules aren't very clear, the character limits are around 3-4!

Engineer

Dang nabbit!

That stupid snake spy was up to it again. Sapping his buildings and hiding like a coward. A few fragments of the broken sentry manage to crash on his leg when he tried to fix it but it suddenly exploded likely due to misconception in the system.

Engineer groaned as he try to remove the metal off him which only resulted more pain to his crushed leg. Earlier on, the spy was able to land a few shots which he was able to barely survive from by pretending to be dead.

He was seriously going to get back at him at the next round. He vowed and began forming some sinistrous plans mentally as he still tried getting back up again.

As he looked around the surroundings, his eyes snapped to the health kit nearby. He knew it's hopeless at this point, but he tried just once again to reach it.

Suddenly, the sounds of distant shouting caught his attention. He looked at the corner where the noise was coming from and froze, hearing footsteps and a shadow coming closer to where he is.

Engineer could only stare, taking out his pistol and ready to give his best.

He was about to shoot when he sees your head peeking out the corner and the two of you lock eyes.

You gasped faintly, retreating back your head again, making engineer drop his gun down a little. For a while he only observes, expecting you to pop out again and this time with a weapon.

To his surprise however, you only slowly came closer with your medi-gun and stood infront of him, this made him distracted and you looked to the side seeing the health kit. He also look at the direction you were looking and then you two look back at each other.

You walked towards the kit and picked it up and came close to him as he watches closely, loosely letting the pistol down. You kneel down beside him and handed him the health kit, to which he can only gawk at for a moment before accepting it. You then peer at the metal scrap crushing his leg and motion to him to push it off while you try to lift it up.

At last, with some struggle, you succesfully were able to remove the scrap off.

He thanked you, feeling certainly grateful for your aid. You only smiled and nodded making engineer blush. Then you stood back up, picking your medi gun and gave him a final glance and a wave on your way back to outside.

He can only gaze at your frame leaving, still blushing and thinking about what just happened even while fixing himself up.

Sniper

Ah, piss.

Sniper was so close on pulling the trigger on a enemy's head when he just had to be shot a few times near his chest and shoulder by another sniper.

Now he's currently sitting on the floor, unable to really move due to his wounds. The medic is obviously too busy and far from his spot so all he could do for now is keeping his guards up while trying to ease the pain with some bandages he had.

As he's paying close attention to the ongoing battle, His eyes landed on you emerging from behind a rock, healing your team's scout with your medigun while charging forward.

Now his interest shifted from the enemy's fighting to just paying attention to you instead. He'd seen you time to time through the scope but usually you'd stay behind as extra help. He wasn't sure why sometimes when he aims for you, he'd hesitated. It's almost somewhat wrong.

His thoughts were interrupted by the stinging pain in his shoulder as he groan and lean closer to the wooden window. Suddenly your team soldier's shout rang aloud alerting about his presence.

Sniper panicked as he push himself far away from the wooden window, hearing fast footsteps rapidly approaching his spot. He took his kukri and prepare himself to fight.

Shortly to his surprise though, only you were the one who came. He was really close to attacking─ yet there it is again. The odd hesitating feeling. While being confused with his own choices, you took the medkit you found just outside and offered it to him. While you only smile, sniper is left dumbfound. By the fact that you're not trying to kill him here and there, but also because he did not notice there was even a health kit literally sitting feets away from him.

As he took the kit from you to heal himself, you also proceed to use your medigun to slightly fasten his healing process before you hear your name being called. You call back to them, confirming that you're okay. You gave him a wave and a warm smile before you quickly ran out to your team.

Sniper only sat down there at one of the crate boxes as he proceed the aimless thoughts in his mind about this encounter with you. Well, atleast now it seems like he knows the reason why he's so hesitant to hurt you.

Spy

Oh it's just perfect.

Spy sighs deeply in annoyance as he sat down in a corner with his burnt leg, arm and wounded stomach. His broken Invisibility watch in his hand as his attempts on turning it back on didn't work as it only let out a few sharp electric sparkings.

Great. His invis watch is broken and he is still in the enemy's section with the high possibility that anyone could easily figure out where he is. He feels oddly dreadful about this whole situation as he imagined the worst scenario that could happen in his mind.

It was all oddly quiet at first before he heard a few distinct voices and footsteps passing by. He tries to focus more on where the steps are heading to so he could escape before they caught him first.

He feels rather confused and irritated by the random noises and constant back and forth steps, combined with the pain he's feeling makes him want to just scream but he holds back. He takes deep breath and stood up and accidently hitting his wounded arm which he let out a yelp before he shuts himself up.

It was too late though. He heard some yelling and a brief talk before he hears footsteps once again. He tries to get away but it seems like he was not fast enough as by then, you appeared by the entrance.

You two stared at each other for a moment before he took out his revolver and aim it at you, but you quickly shot it away with your syringe gun.

Spy only looked at his hand then at you in shock. And he realizes that he's basically helpless at the hands of the enemy now.

So close to accepting this defeat, he stumble back and sat down with a tired and dejected look, closing his eyes.

Instead of a quick shot in the head, he felt something being dropped on his lap and a sudden soothing sensation enveloping his body. Confused, spy opens his eyes to see you standing infront of him, using your medigun on him and a healthkit on his lap. He's left baffled by this and was about to ask just what you were doing but you only shush him by nodding softly.

So the two of you only settled in silent as your medigun continue to help speeding up the process. He decided to take out another cigarette, placing it in his mouth and was about to light it up, but he wasn't able to find his lighter anywhere. Just then a lighter reached near his face and lighten the cigarette up for him. Your face was close to his, with the flame illuminating the small details on your face as he stares at you with wide eyes.

Even when you pulled away, spy was still stuck in daze for a moment before he blushes in embarrassment at the gesture. Thankfully you weren't able to see his face with that mask.

He cleared his throat and thanked you in an almost sheepish manner and you smiled in return, giving him a thumbs up. Then you used your syringe gun and shoot at one of the empty bottle laying around before you wink and walked out hurridly.

REBLOGS/ FEEDBACK/ COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED!

@redamoureux

[oddinary4bts]

Chasing Cars | ch 4 (jjk)

☆summary: when your brother goes to study on a semester abroad, your life collides with his best friend Jeon Jungkook, who's coincidentally your roommate. Will you survive the collision, or will you crumble into dust?

☆pairings: brother's best friend!Jungkook x younger sister!female reader

☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI, this chapter contains mature content)

☆genre: forbidden love?au, college!au, slice of life!au, smut, angst (as usual a lot of it), fluff

☆warnings: the power outage is still power outing, curses, Jungkook being Jungkook, mentions of being really drunk and throwing up, explicit content: they talk about what happened in ch 3, teasing, some Mario Kart (yes, it has to be in the explicit content section lmao), hickeys, brat!reader, dom!Jungkook, big dick!Jungkook, degradation (he calls her a slut/pretty little slut), consent king Jeon Jungkook, oral sex (female receiving), fingering, jerking off, talks about having raw sex, protected sex, praise

☆word count: 9.5k

☆a/n: new chapterrrrrrr! Enjoy reading everyone <3 there's a tiny bit of angst if you squint your eyes really hard, but the real angst will hit much later on. Thank you to @moonleeai and @jessikahathaway for beta-ing, you guys are the best <3

☆series masterpost

☆add yourself to the taglist here!

☆☆☆☆☆

If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol

☆☆☆☆☆

Friday, February 15th

You wake up slowly, with the rising sun. Your room is dark, cold, yet you’re snuggled close to Jungkook, whose body heat has been keeping you warm all night. He’s still asleep, mouth slightly parted, and you watch him for a few seconds before the events of last night come back to your mind, and you have to shut your eyes to try to forget.

It’s hard. His arm is still draped over you, and it twitches in his sleep. You try to push him away, but he wraps his arm around you tighter, nuzzling his face in your neck. It does something to you that you entirely can’t deal with, and you shut your eyes even harder, trying to ignore the way your heart is acting up in your chest.

You breathe in, the cold air taming the burning inside of you. You exhale slowly, and to your surprise, your heart finally decides to start calming down. You keep breathing deeply for a while, and you reckon it might have worked better than you expected because, next thing you know, you wake up with a start.

Jungkook is sitting next to you, and he offers you a lopsided grin as you meet his gaze, heart once again beating wildly.

“Morning, peach,” he greets you, voice gravelly with sleep.

You force yourself to sit up, and you stretch a yawn away. “Morning.”

“Slept well?”

There’s a teasing glint in his eyes, mischief laced with his words. You know you shouldn’t be surprised. Know Jungkook is probably going to turn you into a blushing mess even more now. Especially as he smirks, head cocking to the side while he awaits your answer.

“Yeah,” you answer, and you look towards the window as his eyes bore into your profile. You take a deep breath, another yawn moving through you before you’re able to look at him again. “Did you?”

“Better than I thought I would,” he admits, and he stretches before lying back down, pulling the covers to his face. It’s adorable, in a way Jeon Jungkook should never be, and you force yourself to not let it get to your mind as he continues, “I usually sleep like shit when I sleep with someone.”

You purse your lips, refusing to give meaning to his words as you say, “Maybe last night helped.”

The lopsided smile is back, and he nods once, sighing in content. “We should lose power more often.”

In the hopes that power would come back during the night, you plugged in your phone before going to sleep. You reach for it on the night table, and even though your room is still freezing, you’re still taken aback that the power is still out.

“Well, we still don’t have any,” you inform him.

He glances at you. “Then we should go back to sleep.”

At that, you snort, shaking your head. Even though your battery is low, you still go to your emails, trying to see if you received anything from your professor.

What you find is a college-wide email informing the students that all college activities are cancelled today and through the weekend, to start again on Monday. Your gaze widens before you glance at Jungkook.

“Power is still out in college, too,” you tell him. “So, no class.”

Jungkook’s smile only grows wider, and he opens his arms for you to come cuddle again. “Then what are you waiting for?”

Your heart is warm. A hearth, in which a small fire has started to burn. It’s soft, cozy, and you worry at your bottom lip as you survey Jungkook. As you try to figure out when you crossed the line, and if it’s too late to pull back.

You figure you can decide later when the power is back on and this bubble outside of time will have burst, and you lie back next to him. His arms, still wide open, look far too inviting, and it takes you about five seconds before you’re scooching into his embrace.

He sighs in content. “You know,” he lets out. “If Tae learns, I’m a dead man.”

Reality crashes harder than a tsunami on a beach, and you try to pull away. Jungkook holds onto you, even when you push on his chest.

“I was just going to say,” he adds so you’d stop pushing him, “that we should keep this between us.”

You nod against him as you finally stop trying to pull away. “Yes, I agree.”

“Good.”

And Tae doesn’t cross your mind for the rest of the morning. Eventually, you and Jungkook decide to move out of the safe comfort of the covers, needing to eat something before you die, as Jungkook jokes. It’s a quick trip to the kitchen before you figure your room is far warmer than the rest of the apartment. You retreat with fruits, while Jungkook grabs a bowl of the food he cooked yesterday.

Watching him eat it cold makes you gag, so you turn away from him to focus on eating your apple and blueberries.

“What?” he says, and he sounds like his mouth is full.

“How can you even be eating that?”

There are a few seconds of silence, while he clearly swallows his bite. “What’s wrong with it?”

You scrunch up your nose in disgust, glancing at him over your shoulder. His gaze is narrowed, eyebrows bunched together over his eyes as he fakes offence, or perhaps suspicion. It makes you snort, and you look away from him before you speak again.

“It’s cold.”

“Wow, is it?” he teases. “Never would have noticed.”

You roll your eyes, forcing your laugh down because Jeon Jungkook shouldn’t be making you laugh anyway. Silence replaces the conversation, and you finish eating in peace, watching the world outside the window.

It looks straight out of a fairy tale. The trees are covered in a thick coat of ice, and they glisten in the morning light as if they are made of glass. It’s beautiful, in an unforgiving way, and you find peace in their contemplation.

Peace in this comfortable silence with Jungkook.

By the time you’re done eating, Jungkook has wolfed down the bowl he made for himself, and you both return to the kitchen to put away the dishes you’d used. Jungkook leans against the counter while you rinse them, arms folded on his chest.

“What should we do today?” he asks.

You cock an eyebrow. “We?”

“Yeah.” He chuckles. “Unless you want to be alone.”

Your eyes dart to him quickly, before returning to the safety of the spot where the jet of water hits the bowl you’re holding. “What do you want to do?”

“We could go for a car ride,” he suggests. “To charge up our phones.”

“Don’t you think the roads are a little too dangerous right now?”

He plays with his piercing as he frowns slightly, clearly not having thought about this. “Right.” You watch as the cogs work in his brain, and you can’t help the smile that slowly grows on your lips when his features light up. “We can just stay parked somewhere.”

“We’d still have to get there.”

He furrows his brows. “I’m sure they’ve put salt on the streets, we should be okay.”

What he doesn’t know is that you don’t need convincing. You’ve already decided you’d go, mostly because you do need to charge your phone. Not because you really need it right now, but just because the thought of not having it with you feels strange. 

“We’re going?” Jungkook presses as you remain silent.

He must be immune to the teasing glint you know for a fact has taken over your eyes. You sigh, before nodding once. “Sure.”

He beams. “Let’s go!”

His enthusiasm makes you laugh, and you turn the tap off before turning to watch him as he’s leaving the kitchen. 

“Shouldn’t we brush our teeth and freshen up first?”

He stops in his tracks. “Right.” He turns, flashing you a grin that reveals the same dimples you noticed yesterday. “Good luck with taking a shower, though.”

You snort. “Let’s just brush our teeth.”

Which is what you do, Jungkook pushing you with his hips as you stand next to him. You flip him off, and his eyes sparkle as he looks at you.

It stabs right through your heart, and you look away, searching for salvation on the tiles of the floor. It does nothing – reality is just a heartbeat away, and no matter how easy it is with Jungkook right now, you’re very aware that the moment the world returns to normalcy, your relationship with him will too.

And you still don’t understand where this is coming from. Where this easy complicity between you comes from, and why you’ve never really noticed before. Was it because of Taehyung?

It’s a question you ask yourself for the next hour, as you sit in Jungkook’s car listening to music and belting out tunes even though you’re not half the singer that he is. He doesn’t mention it, only laughs along with you before asking you stupid questions about your past, about Taehyung when you grew up and why you decided to move in with them.

He clearly doesn’t like you saying that it was just because it was convenient. It’s clear as spring water, and he pouts slightly as he says, “Not even for me?”

You punch him in the shoulder. “I didn’t know you when I moved in.”

“But now you do,” he teases, smirk moving on his lips. 

There’s more meaning to his words than it seems, and you feel blush creeping on your cheeks. “Do I?”

“I’d say watching me jerk off and come is a good way to get to know me, no?”

“Jungkook!”

He laughs like a child as you flush furiously purple, trying to ignore how, as a matter of fact, his words are actually turning you on. You don’t want to think about last night, just want to focus on the now, on this unexpected friendship.

Jungkook has other plans for you, because he says, “Don’t tell me you didn’t like it.”

You glare at him. “Shut up.”

“You’re blushing.”

If possible, your glare intensifies. “Shut the fuck up.”

He dissolves in a fit of giggles that makes your heart skip a beat, and you roll your eyes before glancing at your phone. 

“Mine’s full now,” you mutter. 

For a reason you don’t quite understand, Jungkook has two phone cords in his car, both of them working to charge. He glances at his phone, shaking his head.

“You’re going to be stuck with me for longer, peach,” he tells you mischievously. “Mine’s only on 75%.”

“Do you really need it full?”

He offers you an innocent smile. “Definitely.”

Your phone buzzes, and you both glance towards it. You’ve received a text from Ria, in the group chat you share with the whole friend group. She’s asking how everyone’s surviving, and if anyone needs to crash at the dorm, which for some reason, is the only place on campus that still has power.

You hesitate for half a heartbeat before turning your phone off.

*****

Today was fun, albeit cold. After charging your phones in Jungkook’s car, you took a long walk through campus, just talking about everything and nothing as if you’d always been close.

As if he didn’t finger you with his cum last night.

Whenever the thought resurfaces, it makes you startle, and Jungkook smirks. Because he knows – obviously he does.

He knows the effect he has on you. You think he sees how you tense whenever his hand touches yours, whenever he stands just a little too close. And maybe that’s why you avoided going home for a long time, because you’re afraid that being stuck between four walls with him again will make you go insane.

Alas, when you both grow hungry sometime in the afternoon, you can’t force him to stay out, so you follow him home, ignoring the weight of your turned-off phone in your pocket.

Fortunately enough, on all the journey walking around campus, you didn’t run into anyone from your friend group. Somehow, you were afraid that you would – what would they think if they saw you hanging out with Jungkook?

More importantly, what would Hoseok think? Maybe it makes you an asshole, but in the moment, you don’t really care. You are entirely focused on Jungkook, mostly because it’s easy to be entirely focused on him. As if he’s the full moon in a summer night sky – he makes all the stars hard to see, as he shines too bright for their glow to be noticeable. 

You sigh as you’re settled in the kitchen, door closed as Jungkook reheats something on the stove. It’s not extremely cold in the apartment, but keeping the door shut does help with keeping the kitchen warm enough to be bearable with only a thick sweater on.

You think Jungkook is crazy. He’s only wearing a beige and indigo athletic Nike vest, and he’s left it unzipped because he claimed he was getting too warm. Underneath, a white t-shirt rests loosely around his waist, and you’ve been doing your best to forget just how dainty his waist is, under all the clothes.

“See, we’re going to build up your heat tolerance,” he says over his shoulder, and he flashes you a grin before focusing on what he’s reheating again.

“Good luck with that,” you answer, chuckling. “I’ve tried before, and nothing works.”

“You and Tae really are the worst at that,” Jungkook teases, and you roll your eyes even if he can’t see. 

Indeed, he’s turned his head towards the window, and he watches the sun as it gets lower in the sky, nearing the horizon. You’re afraid of when it’ll be gone under; you’re afraid it’ll elicit sinful activities between you and Jungkook again.

Afraid, yet with a certain kind of apprehension to it. Perhaps because it’s not fear of him, but rather fear of yourself.

It’s hard to remember that he’s Taehyung’s best friend when you’re alone with him like this.

Especially when he sets a steaming bowl of food in front of you, a wicked smile on his lips as he forces you to eat. As you choke on it, the heat too much to handle for you. Jungkook laughs out loud before handing you a glass of ice-cold water.

It barely helps, and the heat remains for a while as you eat, and even more so as you’re done, watching Jungkook eating a second portion as if he hasn’t eaten the first one in record time. You’re playing music on your phone, your usual study playlist – lo-fi beats – and Jungkook seems to like it. He’s been nodding his head to the music as he devoured his bowl.

When he finishes eating, sitting back in his chair as he rests a hand on his stomach, he once again offers you the wide grin. The sun is setting now – the whole kitchen is turning to gold, and you hate that the glow makes him look ethereal, like he’s a piece of heaven fallen to Earth for you to enjoy.

“Do you want to wash yourself?” Jungkook asks out of the blue. You cock an eyebrow in question, but before you’ve had a chance to say anything, he adds, “We could warm some water on the stove and use that to wash ourselves.”

Your eyes widen. “That’s actually a good idea.”

“Come on, peach,” he lets out, and he chuckles as he shakes his head, a little condescendingly. “You really think I’m stupid, don’t you?”

Stupid wouldn’t be the word that you’d use. Arrogant, maybe. Too full of himself, for sure. But you don’t think that saying so would be a good idea, so you only shrug.

“Aren’t you?”

He bursts out laughing, that goofy smile that makes your heart skip beats in your chest as if you’re twelve and it’s the first time you’re speaking to a guy. “I’m not, thank you very much. I wouldn’t be in college if I was.”

“Lots of stupid people are in college,” you point out mischievously.

He tuts. “I’d thought by now you’d know I’m not a lot of people, peach.” He cocks his head to the side, and his eyes drop to your lips. “You get fingered by a lot of guys like that?”

You turn to fire. “Excuse me?”

And the goofy smile returns, as if he didn’t just say the crudest sentence in the world. “Just teasing you.”

You narrow your eyes but don’t find any retort to that. It makes Jungkook’s grin widen, and then he gets up to bring your bowl and his to the sink. As he’s rinsing them, he offers you a look.

“Should I reheat some water then?” he asks, the teasing tone gone. 

You try a look towards him, but standing there, the sun forms too much of an aura around him, so you can barely see him even if you squint your eyes. 

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

“One pot for you and one for me, then!”

His statement makes you laugh, and you get up to actually help him get the pots on the stove. You turn the gas on, using the lighter so that the flames catch, and soon the water is heating up, and the prospect of freshening up brings a smile to your lips.

You notice Jungkook looking at it, features turning somber. And he’s quick to look away. Quick to focus on where the sun dipped under the horizon, watching the clouds turning to gold above.

“Have you spoken to Tae today?” he asks, and the reminder of your brother makes you clench your jaw, ever so slightly.

“No,” you admit. You think he’ll say more, but he remains silent. So you take it upon yourself to make conversation, and you ask, “Have you?”

He shrugs. “Just told him the power is still out.”

“Mmh.”

The silence is deafening then – you can barely hear it over the clamour in your thoughts. And you don’t know where it’s coming from, only that the more the silence stretches, the more you grow unsteady on your feet.

“How did you guys meet?” you ask, voice sounding a little strained.

Jungkook shoots you a look. “He didn’t tell you?”

You purse your lips and shake your head no, which earns you a chuckle from him. It makes you grow suspicious, and you narrow your gaze. “What?”

“Nothing.” He pauses, observes your features for a moment with those big doe eyes of his before he says, “We met Frosh week.”

You remain silent, waiting for him to continue.

“He was pissed out drunk in a bush,” Jungkook admits, and his eyes fog up with the memories as he looks away from you. “Jimin is the one that found him first. And mind you, I only knew Jimin for a few days then, since we were dorm roommates.”

But you know how easy friendship forms in that Frosh week. You and Nabi are a good example of it after all.

“We couldn’t find anyone who knew him, so we brought him back to the dorm. He threw up in Jimin’s bed, and the next day he suggested grabbing breakfast together, as a thank you for taking care of him.”

Jungkook smiles fondly, and his gaze connects with yours. “And the rest is history.”

It sure is. You’re not really sure where you come into this story – if you should come into it at all. Because Jungkook and Taehyung really are close – what would Taehyung say if he knew what Jungkook and you did?

It’s a scary thought, one that you’ve remedied with Jungkook already. You just have to not tell Taehyung, simple as that.

“I think the water is ready,” Jungkook admits, and he dips his fingers in one of the pots. He nods, before saying, “You can grab yours, and go to the bathroom. I’ll clean up in my room.”

“Don’t you need soap?”

He raises an eyebrow. “You know soap can be carried outside of a bathroom? Like, it’s not confined-“

His sentence dies as you punch him in the chest, and he starts laughing as you curse him under your breath, grabbing the pot. 

“Open the door for me,” you grumble as you walk towards it.

“Please?”

You look up to the water-stained ceiling. “Are you for real?”

“Yes.”

You debate silently, though you know that you’ll cave in.

You reckon you’ll always cave in where Jungkook is concerned. 

“Can you please open the door for me?” you ask, and you scold yourself internally for not being able to stand your ground.

“Of course, peach,” he says, grinning widely. “I can actually carry that to the bathroom for you, I need to grab soap and a towel anyway.”

He walks towards you, gently taking the pot out of your hands, so you end up opening the door for him, begrudgingly following him to the bathroom. You follow him in, watching him as he carefully puts the pot down in the sink. 

“Here you go,” he says as he shoots you a look over his shoulder. 

You can’t help but look away as your gazes connect, before mumbling, “Thank you.”

“You could at least sound happy about it,” he teases. You roll your eyes, though a smile teases the corners of your lips. Jungkook taps your cheek, and you bristle, stepping away from him. 

If he cares he doesn’t show it, instead moving to grab a washcloth and his shower gel. 

Are you disappointed to see him go? Maybe. But you don’t let it show, instead shutting the door behind him, making sure to lock it before you strip out of your clothes to wash up.

It’s freezing, and you hate every second of it, so you make it quick, washing the most strategic and important body parts. When you’re done, you move to grab your clean clothes from the…

You never grabbed clean clothes, did you? 

You curse under your breath, mostly cursing Jungkook for making you so stupid around him. You hate it - you feel like you lose most of your brain cells when he’s around. But you can’t help it, and you tightly wrap yourself in a towel as you pray to the God above, if there’s one, to not make you run into Jungkook as you walk back to your room.

Of course, Jungkook opens the door to his room the second you are in front of it. You startle, freezing like a deer in headlights, and Jungkook’s gaze dips to your legs.

You hate the smirk growing on his lips the second it appears.

“What’s got you walking around naked in this temperature?”

Though you reckon his gaze warms you up in an instant, you reply, “Fuck off, I just forgot to get clean clothes.”

He leans against his doorframe, slipping his hands in the pocket of his grey sweatpants. He looks the perfect picture of male insolence, and fuck, it does things to you that it shouldn’t.

Like, make you remember that he fingered you with his cum yesterday. Thinking about it, it was a really stupid thing to do, but you hadn’t been able to resist…

And from the way he’s eyeing you right now, you highly doubt you’ll be able to resist him again. You realize then that the apartment is darkening, that soon you’ll have to light up the candles… 

You’re sinking in quicksands, aren’t you?

“How unfortunate,” Jungkook comments, always so arrogant.

“I said it already, but do really fuck off, JK,” you reply.

He tilts his head to the side - the predator, and you, its next meal. “That’s not what you were saying yesterday.”

You blush, bright scarlet taking over your features, and you roll your eyes, choosing to ignore his comment as you finish walking to your room.

“That’s what I thought,” he says behind you, and you flip him off over your shoulder, which makes him laugh that boyish laugh that does things to you.

You lean against the bedroom door once you get in, heart beating out of your chest, cursing power for going out, and cursing your brother for choosing to do a semester abroad.

It’s useless - the cursing, that is. Because it won’t change anything, and a small, tiny, minuscule part of you doesn’t want it to… so you curse yourself too for good measure.

By the time you finally emerge from your bedroom, the sun has fully set, and you’ve been using your phone as a flashlight. Jungkook is sitting in the living room, playing on his Switch, which apparently still has battery, and he glances at you as you approach.

“Want to play a game?” he asks, offering you a small smile. 

His features are lit from the screen, and he looks soft, his big eyes slightly crinkling at the corners. You hold in your own smile, instead cocking an eyebrow.

“So that I can beat your ass?” you say.

You watch as fire catches in his gaze, and you think he’s about to burn you to the spot. “Oh, you wanna play this game?” he says, his voice suddenly an octave lower.

A thrilled shiver runs down your spine, and you finish crossing the distance between you and him, sitting next to him. The leather couch is freezing, but you hold your wince in as you motion to the Switch.

“You think you can beat my ass?” he asks. 

“I know I can.”

He smirks, leaning back on the couch. He rests his head against the backrest, turning his head towards you. “Oh, peach,” he breathes out. “You’re cute when you try to be sassy.”

You widen your gaze. “Try to be sassy! I’m serious, I’ll beat your ass.”

“In any game?” he asks, and his eyes dip to your lips.

“Mario Kart,” you say, folding your arms on your chest.

You’re wearing a thick sweater, yet it doesn’t stop Jungkook from looking down, and you know exactly what he’s seeing - you, with your legs spread wide open for him like they were yesterday.

“Winner gets head,” he says, and you really think you’re about to catch fire.

“What about Tae?”

You can’t help the question. Because you don’t want to do that to your brother, but you’ve been unable to resist. You know shame and guilt will catch up to you one day - hell, Ria will never let you live it down if she learns what’s already happened. 

Jungkook shrugs. “I don’t think it’d make any difference after yesterday.”

“So you want me to choke on your dick?”

Night and you and Jeon Jungkook really don’t mix well, do they? Because you want him. You want him so bad right now you think you’re about to go insane, yet you know you shouldn’t.

“Fuck, peach.” He chuckles. “I want to know if you taste as good as you look.”

You wet your lips, and his eyes fall to your mouth, staying there as you say, “Well then, winner gets head,” you murmur, and you think he’s about to say ‘fuck it’ and jump on you.

You really do think he won’t be able to resist, and frankly, you don’t want him to. You feel yourself leaning forward, a moth to the flame, but Jungkook clears his throat, and his eyes shoot to yours.

“Deal.”

Jungkook sets up the game, and since you can’t play multiplayer thanks to the power being out and the TV not functioning, you settle on whoever gets first place first. Which you reckon is stupid - getting first place when you’re playing against the AI isn’t really an impressive feat. 

You shiver before Jungkook starts his race, and he pauses the game to glance at you. “Do you want to go to your room?”

You cock an eyebrow. “Too excited to play here?”

He rolls his eyes, though a smile tugs at the corners of his lips. “No, you’re freezing, and I figured, since your room is the smallest, if we do like yesterday, we can probably keep it warm. Or at least warmer than here.” His last words are accompanied by a vague motion of his hand encompassing the living room, and you reckon he does have a point. 

“Sure then,” you say, nodding once. 

You get up from the couch, and Jungkook quickly follows you. He’s so close, looming behind you like he’s the predator about to pounce on its prey, and you shudder with delight, warmth pooling in your lower stomach.

You think he knows. You’re convinced he does, because a few minutes later, when you’re in your room with the candles on, sitting on your bed, he leans against the wall, abandoning his Switch to the side.

“What are you doing?”

“It’s so easy to get into your bed, peach,” he teases, and you startle when one of his large hands lightly grazes your thigh.

You swat it away without an ounce of regret, even though the spot he touched feels like it’s been hit by lightning. “Are you saying I’m easy?”

His mouth falls open and he looks surprised, even maybe a little apologetic. “I didn’t mean it that way.”

The wicked smile you offer him makes him chuckle as he realizes you were teasing him, and he grabs his Switch, his brow creasing a little with the frown that adorns his features from concentrating. It’s cute. You reckon it’s adorable, and you reckon you shouldn’t feel that way about your brother’s best friend, so you push the thought as far away as you can.

It’s not like Jungkook is the kind of guy you should feel endearment for. Because you know he’d only break your heart - he’s not the most popular guy on campus for nothing, after all.

“Ready?” he tells you.

You nod. “Good luck.”

He doesn’t need it. He gets first place, and he puts his Switch down on the bed as you realize what it means.

But you’re not going to give in so easily to him, will you?

“If I get first place, too, then this doesn’t count.”

He fake-glares at you, but he shrugs. “Alright. Let’s see if you can get first place.”

The way he says it is ominous, and you gulp, cheeks flushing with pink as you grab the Switch. As per always, you choose Peach as your character, which obviously earns you a snicker from Jungkook, but you don’t mind.

Maybe because you’re starting to like when he calls you peach.

You easily start the race in the first position, Peach racing and drifting ahead of the AI-controlled characters. Jungkook shifts next to you, attracting your attention, and you almost run into a wall, thankfully recovering quickly.

It doesn’t last long. Because next time he shifts, Jungkook brushes your thigh, and you just know he has a wicked smirk on his lips without having to look at him.

“Stop,” you say through gritted teeth.

“Or what?” he purrs, and you nudge him with an elbow. He just laughs, his hand now resting flatly on your thigh. “Got trouble focusing?”

“You’re cheating,” you whine, and you’re hit by a blue shell which puts you back a few positions.

“Am I?” he breathes out.

You sigh as he leans closer to you, and his nose brushes your cheek. Instinctively, you tilt your head to the side, and he chuckles as he pushes your hair off your shoulder, before leaning even closer.

His lips ghost on your neck, and your eyes flutter close, the Switch entirely forgotten in your hands.

“Jungkook…”

His tongue darts out, tasting you, and then he sucks a hickey on your skin. “What?”

“What are you doing?” you ask, voice barely over a whisper.

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about my fingers inside of you,” he says, huskily. “All fucking day.” He nibbles at your earlobe, and you let out a breathy sound that makes him chuckle again. “Just been thinking about how you’d feel on my dick too.”

“Fuck.”

“I know.” He kisses your jaw, and then pulls away, sitting back against the wall. “I think you lost.”

You open your eyes, realizing that you’re still holding the Switch. He’s right – the AIs have finished while Jungkook was teasing you, and you stare at the screen for a few seconds before meeting his gaze.

He looks victorious, happy with himself. You want to wipe the smirk off his lips, so you put down the Switch on the bed, kneeling next to him.

“So you want me to suck your dick now?” you say, voice low, and you drag a hand on his thigh.

His tongue toys with his piercings. “Well, wasn’t that the deal?”

Emboldened, you straddle his lap, and you wrap a hand around his throat for support. You feel him swallow, and you lean closer, watching as the smirk slowly disappears from his lips.

“Was it?”

He gulps. He fucking gulps, and you can’t help but bite your lower lip. Even though the room is cold, you feel warm, a tingly sensation slowly taking over your entire body. His eyes fall to your mouth, and it takes him a few seconds before he says, “Yes.”

You have him right where you want him to be. “Damn, who knew Jeon Jungkook wanted me so bad?”

You lean in, brushing your lips on his, tongue darting out to play with his piercings. He doesn’t move, doesn’t do anything, though you can tell that he wants to touch you.

Maybe because you’re perched on his erection.

“Maybe Tae should have left before, mmh?” you continue. “Maybe you wouldn’t be so desperate…”

Jungkook grabs your waist, spinning you around dizzyingly until you’re on the bed and he’s hovering over you. “Enough,” he says, voice rough.

You don’t lose the smirk. “Or what?”

He wets his lips and then leans in. “I’m going to have so much fun wiping that smirk from your lips, peach.”

“Oh, will you now?” you fire back. “Better get into action then.”

One of his hands grabs the side of your head, tightening around your hair, and he forces you to turn your head to the side. He leaves wet kisses down your neck and then moves back up to your jaw. 

“If only Tae knew how much of a slut you are,” Jungkook says. “A pretty little slut.” Your smirk wavers as he pushes your legs apart with a knee. “I wonder, are you already soaked for me, mmh?”

“Why don’t you find out?”

He chuckles darkly. “Fucking hell, you really are driving me crazy.”

And even though you shouldn’t, even though Jungkook is your older brother’s best friend, even though you know guilt will eventually catch up to you, you say, “Then act on it, JK. Show me just how crazy I’m making you feel.”

His mouth collides with yours with force, and you immediately reach up, running your hands through his hair. He sucks on your tongue, earning a moan from you, and he grunts as you pull on his hair, the soft strands feeling like silk on your fingers.

He grinds into you, and you feel the powerful length of him rub against you. You know he’ll stretch you wide open, and you want him so bad it almost hurts.

You think you’ve wanted him for months already. Yesterday, you could blame it on the alcohol, on your inhibition being altered, but today… Today you know it’s always been about the tattoos, the piercings, and the shameless flirting.

You’ve been in Jungkook’s orbit ever since September – you were bound to crash into him someday.

Jungkook pulls away to meet your gaze. The weight of his body on yours feels right – better than Hoseok’s ever felt. The thought douses you, and you think Jungkook notices.

You know he does, because he says, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Your eyes flit around his features for a time – his nose, his mouth, the mole underneath his lips, his left eye, the scar on his cheek. They eventually settle on his lip piercings. 

“Are you getting insecure?” you tease. Because it’s all that you know how to do, the only way you can think of pushing the vulnerability away.

His tongue pokes at his cheek, and he presses another searing kiss on your lips. You can’t help but moan softly as he grinds again, and you instinctively wrap your legs around him, your arms circling his neck as well.

When he pulls away next, it’s to rest his forehead against yours. You breathe the same air for a few seconds, until he says, “Consent is hot, peach. Tell me you want it, or I’m stopping now.”

“I want it, JK,” you answer. “I want you to fuck me dumb until my room isn’t cold anymore.”

Jungkook straightens, kneeling between your legs. The candles cast flickering lights on his honey skin, and you watch unblinkingly as he takes off his shirt. 

He’s beautiful. You realized that yesterday, though you didn’t see him without the shirt. But he’s truly beautiful, all muscle and delicate waist, and his skin glows golden under the light of the candles. His brown nipples are perked prettily on his chest, and you want to touch him, want to drag your hands over every powerful line of his body.

“Shit, it’s fucking cold,” he says, and he quickly bends down again. 

You grab the blankets, pulling them on top of him. Without any trace of hesitation, you rest your hands on his back, and you lightly scratch him with your nails.

“Then we better get you warmed up,” you purr.

You don’t need to say it twice. Jungkook finds your mouth again, and he grunts as you dig your nails in his skin, before releasing the pressure. He then goes down to your jaw, down your neck, and he disappears under the covers, spreading your legs wide open with his large hands.

“Can I take these off?” his muffled voice says from beneath the blankets.

You pull enough on the covers to see his face, big doe eyes awaiting your consent. “Yes.”

He smirks wickedly. “Good.”

He’s quick to rid you of your pants. He leaves your panties on, his large hands caressing your thighs as he settles between your legs. You know he’s going to eat you out, and you think you’ll go insane. But nothing could have prepared you for how much of a tease he is.

Indeed, Jungkook presses light kisses on the insides of your thighs, mouth ghosting over where you need him the most, never once giving in to your desires. You’re soaking wet, painfully so by the time you groan, hand flying to his hair as you try to push his head where you want him.

He resists, chuckling darkly. “Growing a little impatient?”

“Eat me out,” you answer breathlessly. “Fuck.”

“Why should I?” He bites the inside of your thigh. “I love watching you squirm under me.”

You whine, yet this time, he licks the wet spot on your panties. Your thighs instinctively close, and he forces them wide open again.

“Don’t move,” he orders.

You try to obey. You really do, but when he pushes your panties to the side and sucks on your clit, your back arches off the bed. 

“Jungkook,” you breathe out. 

He doesn’t answer, too busy pushing his tongue inside you, parting your folds easily. You moan, and your grip on his hair tightens, though you keep him close. And he doesn’t seem like he wants to pull away. He starts making out with your pussy, squelching sounds coming from between your legs with every swipe of his tongue.

Soon, he gets bored of pushing his tongue in and out of you, and he moves back to your clit, circling it unforgivingly. He’s good, that much you’ll admit, and when he circles your entrance with one long finger, you moan again.

“You want it?” he asks, pulling away just long enough to voice the words.

He’s right back on your clit a fraction of a second later, and he sucks on it, flicking the sensitive bud with his tongue.

You feel the orgasm. It’s still far, but it’s on the horizon of your conscience, and you know it’ll hit good once it does. So you say, “Please, Jungkook.”

He doesn’t disappoint. He pushes his finger in, arches it to rub that sweet spot inside of you in time with the motions of his tongue on your clit. You grind in his face by reflex, and he grunts against you as you do so, resting his tongue flat on your clit so that you can pleasure yourself on his face.

He must know it’s not enough. Because after a few seconds of it, he starts moving his face from side to side, and the orgasm looms closer, aiming for you at the speed of light.

It hits when Jungkook pushes a second finger in, stretching you, and your walls clench hard against his digits, though he keeps on pushing them in and out of you in a steady rhythm. He sucks on your clit as you come, and you think you’ve moaned his name at least twice by the time he finally pulls away, drying his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Shit, peach,” he says, and you watch him through the ecstasy blurring your gaze. “You taste so fucking good.”

As if he wants to show you, he captures your mouth in a kiss. You taste yourself, but you’re too fucked out to be able to agree or disagree with him. All you can do is moan in his mouth, and he swallows it with a swipe of his tongue.

 And as he keeps kissing you, keeps branding himself in your mouth, you run your hand on his body, blood boiling from the sheer strength that you know he has. You reach for the band of his sweatpants, going lower to wrap your hand around his clothed length.

He’s big and heavy in your hand. 

Mostly, he’s not wearing any underwear. Or if he is, they are extremely loose, because you’re able to wrap your fingers around him even through the sweatpants. He bucks his hips, and you tighten your hold.

“Why don’t you put that pretty hand under the clothes, mmh?” he teases against your jaw, before he goes to nibbling on your ear. “I’ve been wanting to feel it wrapped around my cock.”

You don’t hesitate. You move back up to the band of his sweatpants, and you quickly push your hand in. You sigh in delight as you find he’s not wearing any underwear, fingers grazing over the velvety softness of his length. He hisses but doesn’t say anything as you test the waters, slowly grabbing his dick.

You lightly stroke him, and he bucks his hips, trying to fuck your hand. 

“Impatient, aren’t you?” you tease him, and he bites at your jaw.

“I’ve been wanting you for a really long time, peach.”

His words make your heart pause in your chest. Because you feel like there’s a deeper meaning, like it isn’t just shameless flirting in the heat of the action. It reminds you of the kiss yesterday, of the way he’d pulled you on his lap with no other intention than to kiss you.

And it makes you tighten your grip on his dick, and he grunts as you start jerking him off faster. But it’s awkward and clumsy with the sweatpants on, so you pull your hand out after a few seconds.

“Take these off,” you say, and he immediately kneels to obey, taking off his sweatpants quickly before resuming his position between your legs.

You’re not sure you were prepared for the sight of Jeon Jungkook fully naked in your bed. Though goosebumps prick at his skin from the cold, he still looks devilish, like he’s about to drag you to hell. His dick stands proud and tall, leaking precum, and the muscles of his thighs strain against his skin. 

He’s big. And not just his dick. Jungkook works out a lot, spends hours every week at the gym, and it truly shows in every angle of him. He looks sculpted in marble, a perfect body that accentuates the beauty of his features, that contradicts the innocence of his big eyes. 

Or maybe what truly contradicts it is the way he fists his cock, jerking off quickly as he eyes you. As he stares you down, and you feel ready to go all over again just from the sight of it.

“You have condoms?” he asks, and he grunts as he keeps jerking himself off.

You have half a thought to tell him to keep going, to come all over you, but you want it too much to resist. So you motion to your night table, saying, “Bottom drawer.”

He nods appreciatively, letting go of his cock so that he can bend and rummage through the drawer until he finds the condoms. He winces as he straightens, a tinfoil package in hand.

“Pretty sure that’s going to be too tight for me.”

You roll your eyes. “Condoms stretch, you know that?”

“Not enough,” he says, flicking your nose teasingly. “But I don’t think we should go raw, so that’ll do.”

Yet, the thought of going raw with him… You grab a hold of his wrist before he’s able to start unrolling the condom on his dick, and he cocks an eyebrow as he meets your gaze.

“Are you clean?”

You see him gulp. Indeed, his throat bobs, and he tilts his head to the side. “Got tested last week,” he admits. “But I really don’t think we should go raw.”

“I’m clean.”

“You’ve been fucking that other guy,” Jungkook says.

“We always wear protection.”

Jungkook purses his lips, taking a deep breath. “Honestly peach, I think I wouldn’t last a minute if I fucked you raw right now. Let me put the condom on.”

He says it in a stern way that makes you let go of his wrist. You feel bad, wondering if you were pushing a boundary, but Jungkook doesn’t seem like he notices. Indeed, he busies himself with putting the condom on, rolling it down his dick, and he winces in pain once it’s all the way down.

“That shit’s fucking tight,” he comments, and then he positions himself between your legs again. His large hands find your thighs, and he caresses up and down once before meeting your gaze. “Are you okay?” he asks, with no lust or desire or anything other than concern for you.

Because of course, he’d notice that you’re feeling bad.

“Sorry if I was insisting…” you say, vaguely motioning to his dick.

He looks down at himself. “About the condom?” He waits for you to nod your head before he says anything else. “Peach, don’t worry about it. I’m seriously close right now, which is really fucking weird, and I just want to be able to make you feel good, m’kay?” He leans down, pressing a soft kiss to your lips. You melt, wrapping your arms around his neck to keep him close. He chuckles, mumbling against your lips, “I don’t know what you’re doing to me, but you really turn me on.”

You think you know what it is. You don’t think it’s about you, or about him. It’s rather about the feeling of doing something you shouldn’t be doing. Of doing something forbidden, because he’s Taehyung’s friend, and you’re Taehyung’s younger sister. 

But you don’t say it. Instead, you whisper, “Then fuck me good, Jungkook.”

He lets out a breathy sound as he leans his forehead against yours. There’s something so intimate about the gesture that you feel your heart soaring in your chest, and then he pushes your ruined panties to the side again so that he can nudge your entrance with his dick. 

“I will,” he promises, and then he pushes in. Just his tip, yet your mouth falls open at how large he already feels, and you tighten your hold on his neck. “Let me know if it hurts.”

Unforgivingly, Jungkook slams all the way in. You let out a broken sound, and he quickly captures your lips in a kiss as he stays right there, deep inside of you, unmoving so that you can adjust around him. And you know you have a lot of adjusting to do – he’s so large it burns, yet the pain feels good. Far too good, and you easily understand how Jungkook got the reputation that he has.

When Jungkook pulls away from the kiss, he slowly pulls out, before pushing all the way in again. Your walls suck him in, and he grunts, leaning his forehead against yours once more.

“Fuck,” he groans. “You feel so fucking good.”

Before you can reply, Jungkook establishes a steady rhythm. Nothing too crazy, but the drag of his dick on your walls is making you see stars, and you softly moan as he keeps moving, never once faltering.

“Moan for me, peach,” he breathlessly says. “I want to hear you fucking screaming my name.”

And then everything changes. Jungkook kneels between your thighs, pulls your legs against his chest, and starts pounding into you, bending down just enough to hit the sweetest spot inside of you. The change of rhythm and position makes you cry out, and your walls clench around him.

He echoes your cry with a moan of his own, something breathless that makes you want to look at him, to stay with him like this forever. So you open your eyes, and the sight of him is nearly enough to make you climax right then and there. 

Yet you don’t. You don’t come as you just watch him, watch the way he’s frowning, teeth digging in his lower lip once in a while. Beads of sweat quickly appear on his temples, but he doesn’t care. He doesn’t falter, not even once, as he fucks you, and you feel that familiar knot forming in your lower stomach. 

You still don’t come. You keep it in – you don’t know why. You just enjoy the moment, refusing to rush towards its ending. Instead, when Jungkook pushes your legs open so that he can bend down and kiss you again, you welcome him in. You wrap your legs tight around him, keeping him close, and you scratch at his back with one hand, the other getting lost in his hair.

He grunts in your mouth, and he finally switches the rhythm, aiming for harder yet slower. It makes him reach new depths, and you can’t help but moan loudly as he keeps going, keeps ramming into you.

For the first time ever since you moved here, your bed slams into the wall from the force of Jungkook’s thrusts. It’s hot, especially as he moves to your neck, sucking hard. 

“Best fucking pussy,” he says in your ear. “Fuck.”

And then he straightens again, forcing you to let go of him, before pulling out. You whine at the sudden loss of sensation, but he just looks down at your pussy, licking his lips at the sight.

“You’re so fucking creamy and wet,” he tells you. “Look at my cock.”

You obey, looking down to where your bodies almost meet. His dick is indeed covered with your juices, and Jungkook gently pushes it between your folds, collecting even more juice. It’s sinful, inherently so, and you moan lightly as he rubs his dick on your clit.

“Think you’ll be able to come for me again?” he asks.

You look up, meeting his gaze. His lips are slightly parted as he breathes in and out quickly, and he smirks wickedly as you nod, once.

“Make me come,” you say, finding some defiance in you again. “You think you’ll be able to do that for me?”

His gaze widens, and then he chuckles. “Fuck peach.” He chuckles again, slightly shaking his head. “I’m going to get addicted to this fucking pussy of yours.”

You whine as he moves from between your legs, lying down on his back. You shoot him a look, and he motions at his body as if in invitation. It makes you laugh, yet you still climb on top of him, grinding on his dick.

His eyes go to your chest, and he gently grabs the hem of your shirt. Even though it’s still cold in your room – though warmer than before – you quickly take off your shirt, wincing as the cold air hits you head on. 

“So pretty,” Jungkook praises, and his hands reach up to push your breasts together. “So fucking pretty.”

You blush slightly under the praise, and you’re about to sink on his dick when he stops you. Your eyes go wide, and he motions to your panties.

“Take these off too. I want to see all of you.”

He says it with so much reverence for you that you can’t say no. You can only obey, sitting next to him just long enough so that you can remove the panties. They are soaked, and you throw them towards the dirty clothes hamper before climbing back on top of Jungkook.

Your gazes meet, and there’s a moment of you watching each other. You wish you could read his gaze, wish you could know what it means when he grabs your wrists to pull you down. Your eyes never disconnect from his, not even as one of his hands goes between your bodies so that he can align his dick with your entrance.

And then he pushes up, pushes in. As if you forgot just how big he is, you moan, eyes fluttering shut on instinct. Jungkook grunts, wrapping his arms around your waist, before saying, “Look at me.”

You do. You meet his gaze again and try to hold it as he starts jackhammering into you, the new angle so good you feel like you’re slowly slipping out of your body, soaring towards the sky outside. It’s so good all you can think about is him, his body, the way that he holds you so gently yet fucks you so rough. You rest one hand on the side of his face as he keeps fucking you, and when you can’t resist anymore, you hide your face in his neck.

“You’re such a good girl,” Jungkook says. “You take me so fucking well.” He grunts loudly, slamming to the hilt. You think he’s coming, but then he pulls almost all the way out, before slamming in again. “I never want to stop fucking you.”

You moan, and then your lips ghost on the shell of his ear. Though you’ve been struggling to speak, you say, “You’re so fucking big.”

“I know,” he breathes out. “Let me know if I hurt you.”

You whine. “Never. You’d never hurt me.”

His grip on you tightens, like he’s trying to say he wouldn’t hurt you, wouldn’t be able to, and then he’s fucking you again. The knot in your stomach comes back in full force, especially as he starts whispering filthy praises in your ear, growing more breathless with every swipe of his hips.

Just when you think you’ll come, Jungkook grunts, “I’m going to c-“

He never finishes his sentence, but the feeling of his dick twitching inside of you as he stills deep inside makes you fly over the edge, and your walls start spasming around his cock, milking his orgasm. It feels far too good, like you’ve reached nirvana, and it takes you so long to come down from your high that you believe you never will.

But you do. You do, and the first thing you notice is the cold. Though it’s a lot warmer than it was when you started this whole ordeal, you still shiver. 

Jungkook gently pulls a blanket over you, before circling your waist again. He doesn’t let go, not even as his dick, now soft, slips out of you. He lets you lay on top of him, ear against his chest so that you listen to his heartbeat, refusing to move.

You don’t want anything to pop this bubble of peace. Never. You just want to stay here with him, content breathing in the same air as him, until eternity flashes in front of you. Until you grow old and grey, to go to sleep forever. It’s a powerful feeling, though you like to tell yourself that it’s mutual. That his heart, beating softly in his chest, beats for you, in time with the beats of your own heart. You hope that he, too, doesn’t want to let go, though you reckon that this probably was just a hook-up to him, something he’ll be proud of, yet keep to himself. Because wouldn’t Jungkook be the kind of guy to be proud he bagged the little sister? You think he would.

And the thought scares you more than you would ever dare to admit.

Prev | Chapter 4.5 | Next

☆☆☆☆☆

Is it me or is it hot in here? oof- Let me know what you thought of this chapter! I hope that smidge of angst at the end doesn't scare you too much...... bc trust me it scares me OOP

All rights reserved to@/oddinary4bts, 2024. Do not copy, repost or translate.

[rickydoodahgrimez]

𝞋𝞎 ─────── 𝐮𝐧𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞

pairing: rick grimes x reader

summary: you and rick grimes have been best friends ever since you were in diapers. after being broken up by your boyfriend; spencer, rick shows you how much you can be loved.

warnings: pet names, teasing, dirty talk, teasing, soft sex, unprotected sex, oral sex (reader receiving), rick being sweet, fluff at the end, hope you enjoy :)

word count: 3.0 k

a/n: apart of my valentine's day special :)) hope you guys like it

“𝐈 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊 𝐈'𝐌 𝐔𝐍𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄.”

The words hung in the night air, fragile and aching, barely above a whisper. You hadn’t meant to say it—not out loud, not to him—but it slipped past your lips before you could stop it.

The weight of them settled between you and Rick like an invisible wall, thick and suffocating. 

You stared down at your hands, twisting them together in your lap, unable to look at him. Maybe if you did, you’d see the confirmation in his eyes—the same realization Spencer had come to when he walked away.

Every guy before him had left, each one finding some excuse, some reason why they couldn’t stay. The world was too dangerous.

You were too much. Too stubborn. Too complicated. And every single time, it chipped away at something inside of you, making you wonder if there was something wrong with you that you just couldn’t see.

Rick didn’t answer right away, and for a moment, you wished you’d kept your mouth shut.

Maybe he was trying to think of a way to let you down easy, to tell you that, yeah, maybe you were unlovable. 

Because if men like Spencer—normal, decent men—couldn’t love you, how could someone like Rick, someone who had carried the weight of the world on his shoulders, possibly have space for you?

Then, finally, he moved.

“You don’t get to say that.”

His voice was low, rough, edged with something sharp. You dared a glance at him, and what you saw made your breath catch.

His jaw was tight, his hands curled into fists on his thighs, but it was his eyes that stole the air from your lungs. Anger simmered there, but not at you. No, this was something else entirely.

“You think because some damn fools didn’t see you—really see you—that it means something about you?” He let out a sharp breath, shaking his head. “That’s bullshit.”

You blinked at him, thrown by the sudden intensity in his voice. “Rick—”

“No.” His voice softened, but his eyes stayed locked on yours, unwavering. “I’ve known you my whole damn life. I’ve seen you at your best, at your worst. I’ve seen you fight, seen you survive, seen you keep goin’ when most people would’ve given up.”

His fingers twitched before he reached for your hand, his touch warm and steady. “And I know you. I know your heart. And I know there ain’t a damn thing unlovable about you.”

Your throat tightened, a lump forming that you weren’t sure you could swallow down. It wasn’t just what he was saying—it was the way he was saying it.

Like it physically hurt him to hear you doubt yourself. Like he’d fight anyone who dared to make you feel this way, even if it was just your own thoughts.

“But they all left,” You whispered, barely able to get the words out. “Every single one.”

Rick’s grip on your hand tightened, grounding. “Then they were fools.”

Your breath hitched, and for the first time that night, the hollow ache inside of you started to ease—because when Rick said something, he meant it.

And if there was one thing you knew with absolute certainty, it was that Rick Grimes never spoke empty words.

You and Rick had been inseparable for as long as you could remember. Some of your earliest memories were of playing in the Georgia sun, your tiny hands clutching his as you ran barefoot through the fields behind his house.

Your families were close, your parents always joking that you and Rick were a package deal. Where he went, you followed, and when you wanted to do something reckless, he was always right there, shaking his head but going along with it anyway.

He was your best friend before you even knew what that meant.

You were there when he scraped his knee riding his bike too fast down the gravel road, and he was there when you broke your arm falling out of the old oak tree in your backyard.

You went to every one of his baseball games, cheering louder than anyone, and when he started liking girls, you were the one who teased him mercilessly.

He did the same to you, side—eyeing every guy who tried to take you on a date, always making sure they knew you weren’t alone.

But then the world ended.

And it was just you two again.

You weren’t kids anymore, but something about surviving the end of the world together made you feel like those reckless kids running barefoot through the grass again.

Only now, it wasn’t scraped knees and bruised elbows—it was blood on your hands and aching bones from days of walking.

Rick had always been protective of you, but after everything, after the fall of the world, that protectiveness hardened into something fierce.

You could see it in the way he positioned himself in front of you during fights, the way his eyes scanned every new place you entered, like he was making sure there was no threat that could take you away from him.

And you weren’t just standing behind him, either. You fought beside him. You had his back the way he had yours, always watching, always ready.

There were nights when you both sat by the fire, Carl's head resting on your shoulder, silent except for the crackling of the flames, the weight of everything pressing down on you.

And then there were the nights when you’d talk about before, about home, about how you used to dream of growing old in that sleepy little town, never knowing that someday, you'd trade white picket fences for bloodstained knives.

But no matter how much the world changed, one thing never did.

You still had him.

And maybe that was the only thing keeping you going.

You let out a humourless laugh, staring down at the splintered wood beneath your feet. “Every guy I’ve been with has left me. Every single one. First before the world went to hell, and now after.” You sucked in a shaky breath. “Spencer was just the latest to figure it out.”

Rick shifted beside you, and out of the corner of your eye, you saw his jaw clench, his hands curling into fists against his thighs. “That what you really think?” He asked, his voice rough, quiet, but carrying the weight of something heavy.

You shrugged, not trusting yourself to look at him. “It’s a pattern, isn’t it?”

“No.” The word came sharp, firm, leaving no room for argument.

You finally turned your head, meeting his gaze. His blue eyes burned in the dim light of the porch lanterns, dark with something intense—something you couldn’t name. “You ever think,” He started, voice lower now, “That maybe the problem ain’t you? Maybe it’s them. Maybe they were too damn blind to see what they had.”

You exhaled sharply, shaking your head. “I don’t know, Rick. I—”

“Don’t,” He interrupted, shifting closer. His body was warm, solid, grounding. “Don’t do that. Don’t sit here and tell me you’re unlovable when I—” He stopped, jaw tightening, like the words caught in his throat. His hands flexed before he reached for you, his fingers grazing yours, hesitant at first. “You got no idea, do you?”

Your breath hitched at the way his touch lingered, deliberate and gentle despite the roughness of his hands. He was always so careful with you, even after everything you’d both been through, even after the years of blood and loss and heartbreak.

“You don’t get it,” Rick murmured, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, tracing slow, absentminded circles against your skin. “You’ve been one of the best damn thing in my life.” His voice was hoarse now, thick with something unspoken. “Ain’t a single man who’s walked away from you that ever deserved you.”

Your throat tightened, and suddenly, the weight of everything—the pain, the doubt, the loneliness—felt unbearable. “Then why,” You whispered, barely holding yourself together, “Does it feel like I’m never enough?”

Rick let out a rough exhale, like it hurt him to hear you say it. He didn’t answer right away. Instead, he reached up, cupping your cheek, his palm warm and steady against your skin.

You swore he could feel how hard your heart was pounding beneath his touch.

“I don’t know how to make you believe it,” He admitted, voice strained. “But I see you. Always have.” His thumb brushed over your cheekbone, his touch reverent, as if you were something fragile, something precious. “Let me show you,” he murmured. “Let me show you how much you can be loved.”

The way he looked at you then—like you were the only thing in the world that mattered—made your breath catch in your throat.

Rick’s thumb traced slow, soothing patterns against your cheek, his breath warm as it fanned across your lips.

His eyes flickered between yours, searching, asking—giving you the chance to pull away, to stop this before it crossed the line.

But you didn’t want to stop.

Your chest rose and fell in time with his, every inch of space between you charged with something you had never dared to name before. His fingers curled under your chin, tilting your face slightly, and then—finally—he leaned in.

His lips brushed against yours, the touch featherlight at first, hesitant. But when you let out a shaky breath and pressed forward, Rick groaned low in his throat, his other hand sliding to the back of your neck as he kissed you fully.

It was slow—deliberate. He wasn’t just kissing you; he was pouring everything into it.

Every unspoken feeling, every stolen glance, every lingering touch over the years.

You sighed into him, parting your lips just enough for him to deepen the kiss, and the moment his tongue brushed against yours, heat curled low in your stomach.

His hand tightened against your waist, pulling you closer, until there wasn’t a breath of space left between you.

By the time he pulled back, you were both breathing hard, foreheads pressed together. Rick’s thumb traced over your swollen lips, his eyes dark, intense. “Tell me you want this.” He rasped, his voice barely more than a whisper.

You swallowed, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt. “I do,” You whispered. “I’ve always wanted you.”

Something in him snapped at that.

Rick stood suddenly, pulling you up with him, his grip firm but careful. His hand slid down your arm, fingers threading through yours as he led you inside.

You followed, heart hammering, pulse thrumming in your ears.

The house was quiet, the only sound the soft creak of the stairs as he guided you up, his grip on your hand never faltering.

When you reached the bedroom, Rick turned to face you, his hands settling at your waist. He studied you, his gaze full of something unreadable—something reverent.

Then, slowly, he reached for the hem of your shirt, his fingers ghosting over your skin.

“This okay?” He murmured.

You nodded, barely able to speak. Rick exhaled softly, pressing another kiss to your lips, slower this time. Deeper.

And as he led you toward the bed, his hands roaming your body with the same care he’d always shown you, you finally understood.

You were never unlovable.

Not to him. Not ever.

He gently cupped your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing against your soft skin. His touch sent shivers down your spine, awakening sensations you had been trying to suppress.

“I’ve wanted to do this for so long.” He murmured as his lips brushed yours again.

You parted your lips, inviting him in, and his kiss was tender yet passionate. His lips moved against yours, exploring and seeking, as if he was trying to convey all his emotions through this simple act.

Rick’s hands slid down your neck, gently caressing your shoulders, making you sigh into his mouth.

The kiss deepened, and you found yourself responding eagerly, your hands gripping his shirt, pulling him closer.

His tongue danced with yours, a sensual battle of wills, as if both of you were trying to express years of unspoken desire in this one moment.

Breathless, you broke the kiss, your eyes searching his. “Take off my shirt, Rick.”

He didn't hesitate; his hands moved to the hem of your shirt, slowly lifting it over your head. His eyes feasted on your exposed body, taking in your delicate curves and the swell of your breasts.

You felt a rush of desire as his gaze travelled over you, making you keenly aware of your own sensuality.

“You’re so beautiful.”

His hands roamed freely, his fingertips tracing the outline of your bra, making you shiver.

He unhooked your bra with nimble fingers, and it slid off your shoulders, revealing your full breasts. His eyes locked onto your erect nipples, and he leaned forward, capturing one between his lips.

You gasped as his tongue swirled around the sensitive peak, his breath hot against your skin.

“Oh, Rick.” You muttered under your breath, your fingers starting to thread through his curls.

He lavished attention on your breasts, suckling and nibbling, his hands kneading and squeezing. His mouth left a trail of kisses down your stomach, causing goosebumps to erupt on your skin.

“I want to taste you.” Rick murmured, making you lay down on the bed.

You shivered in anticipation as he gently nudged your thighs apart. His hands slid under your hips, lifting you slightly, and you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist, granting him full access.

Rick’s eyes met yours, a silent question in his gaze, seeking permission for what he was about to do. You nodded, your heart pounding in your chest, both excited and nervous.

He lowered his head, his warm breath caressing your inner thighs, causing you to squirm with anticipation.

His tongue flicked out, teasingly tracing the sensitive skin just above your underwear line. You bit your lip to stifle a moan, your body already on the brink of pleasure.

With slow, deliberate movements, Rick hooked his fingers under the elastic of your underwear and slid them down your legs, his eyes never leaving your face. You stepped out of the garment, now completely exposed to his gaze.

“You’re stunning.” He muttered, eyes glued to your core.

He positioned himself between your thighs, his face mere inches from your core. You could feel the heat radiating from his body, and you knew he was as aroused as you were.

Rick’s tongue darted out, tasting you for the first time. He moaned softly, the vibrations sending a jolt of pleasure through your body.

His tongue was slow and deliberate, painting broad strokes along your slit, gathering your essence.

“You taste so sweet.” He slowly teased circles on your clit with his tongue.

You gripped the sheets, your body tensing as he explored your most intimate folds. His tongue was skilled and relentless, circling your clit, teasing it, before plunging into your wetness.

He lapped at your juices, savouring your taste, his and your moans of pleasure filling the room.

“Oh, God, Rick!”

He responded by increasing the pace, his tongue working feverishly. He added a finger, sliding it into your wetness, curling it to find that sweet spot within.

Your body trembled as he stimulated you both internally and externally, pushing you ever closer to the brink of ecstasy.

“Come for me, baby. Let go.”

His words were the final push you needed. Your orgasm exploded within you, rippling through your body like an electric current. You cried out, your nails digging into his shoulders as wave after wave of pleasure washed over you.

Rick continued to lap at your sensitive flesh, drawing out your climax, milking every last drop of pleasure. Your body shuddered and convulsed, and you clung to him, riding out the storm of sensations.

Finally, you collapsed back onto the bed, your breath coming in ragged gasps. Rick crawled up beside you, his eyes sparkling with satisfaction.

His lips found yours again, slow and deep, his calloused fingers tracing lazy circles along your bare skin. He hovered over you, his body warm and solid against yours, his hand slipping down to guide himself to you—

The front door swung open with a loud creak.

“Dad, I’m home!”

Panic shot through both of you like a lightning bolt. You and Rick scrambled apart so fast that you nearly fell off the bed. He cursed under his breath, fumbling for his jeans while you scrambled to the floor, your heart hammering.

Carl’s footsteps thudded down the hall just as you finished pulling on your top. Rick, still flushed and slightly out of breath, ran a hand through his messy hair as Carl appeared in the doorway.

The boy glanced between the two of you, brow raising slightly. “Hey.” He said casually, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Hey, Carl.” you replied, your voice an octave higher than normal. You could feel the heat burning your cheeks, and Rick, beside you, looked equally guilty, clearing his throat as he avoided eye contact with his son.

Carl’s gaze lingered for a second too long before he nodded and turned away. “I’ll be in my room.”

As soon as his footsteps faded, you exhaled in unison, both of you collapsing back onto the bed. Rick groaned, rubbing his hands down his face. “Christ.”

You covered your face, laughing into your palms. “That was way too close.”

Rick peeked over at you, his lips twitching. “You think he—?”

“Nope. Don’t wanna think about it.” You rolled onto your side, facing him, and he smirked, finally relaxing. His hand found yours, squeezing gently.

“We’ll finish this later,” He murmured, voice low and full of promise.

You shivered at the way he said it, unable to stop the smile spreading across your lips.

Unknown to you, Carl was smirking the minute he walked away.

idk why but i can kinda see rick doing baseball when he was a child

[casanovawrites]

random sentence prompts  ━ from various tv shows, part 22

this isn’t who you are.

it’s hard to recognize hope, even when it’s right in front of us.

sounds like a terrible idea. i’m in. 

you, like, awakened something in me.

that girl’s like hanging out with a funeral.

places are easy to leave. it’s the people that are hard to leave behind.

i won’t prove them right. i won’t be the monster they think i am.

it feels like you’re kind of out of sync in your life.

it’s mushy, i don’t like it.

does anyone think about me as much as i think about them?

i know i feel too much. but isn’t that good, too? because i would do anything for the people that i love.

told you i’d survive.

love is a lot of things. safe isn’t one of them.

indifference is the best revenge.

sometimes i come here to cry.

maybe next time you just need to kiss someone who wants to kiss you back.

what if all your dreams come true and it’s still not enough?

god, i love the smell of air conditioning.

i wish i was like you. i wish i could just be a stone cold bitch and not care.

i matter. i should matter to you.

i didn’t make you anything that wasn’t in there already.

don’t you see? this is life or death.

you make my life worse. you make me worse. you’re the thing that i do when i want to hate myself.

all you do is lie to me.

this is why you broke up with me. i’m a crazy person.

once someone leaves, that’s it. that’s who they are.

not many people wanna be my friend right now. i’m not very popular.

i don’t know who i am without you. you changed my life, my life became about you.

i’m strong. i’ve had to get really strong.

kinda nice to know there’s a little bit of crazy going on around here that doesn’t involve us.

that’s what us lesbians do. we just stare at each other and nothing ever happens and we think about it forever.

i do not trust happiness. 

you know, i’ve been pretty independent my whole life.

you’re not the one i need to hear ‘sorry’ from.

it’s okay to fall apart a little.

your feelings can be a lot sometimes.

you are giving me panic attacks. what are you still doing here?

i could use a break from keeping you alive.

we are some shitty best friends.

you turn the page, and you don’t look back. you do better today than you did yesterday.

do you think we’ll ever be able to trust each other again?

i was the original leaver. i just came back.

he makes you feel bad about yourself, why would you spend any time with him?

the only person who doesn’t know how beautiful you are is you.

you know how i can come across as a weird asshole sometimes?

you’ve become more questions than answers for me.

you are the calmest thing i know.

why don’t you want happiness?

i’m your only friend.

you know, it just feels like we should be fucking.

also, you look really hot, by the way. 

you just seem so unapologetically you. like, in every way. where does that come from?

when i’m with you, i don’t feel sick to my stomach.

how do you do that? say out loud what i’m thinking? 

don’t ruin your life by being passive aggressive.

it’s like you’re lost.

you can’t rewrite the past.

i’m not happy here. and i don’t think you are, either.

now that i’ve met you, now that i know what it feels like to be in love with you, i cannot see spending the rest of my life with anyone else.

what do you do except follow me around?

you’re just drunk and you’re trying to hurt my feelings.

i always felt like nothing.

who needs food when you have love, right?

do you have any idea what it feels like to be in pain all day?

you’re clinging to me to make yourself feel better.

because of you, i finally know what it’s like to really want something, but it can’t just be you.

if we don’t break up now, i will continue to make you my whole world.

you better make us breaking up worth it. if you’re not gonna fight for us, at least fight for you.

if it weren’t for you, i’d still be locked in a life that wasn’t mine.

maybe we’ll be ready for each other in 10 years. 

next time you see me, it won’t be as friends.

you were hurting, and you lashed out, because that’s what you do.

i was so angry at you for leaving. i don’t want to feel like that anymore.

you want your revenge? or you want your people to live?

look at you. fighting is all you know.

i promise, i won’t slow you down. i’ll just keep you company.

you haven’t been happy about anything in a long time.

doing the right thing can kiss my ass.

nothing like a little pain to remind you you’re alive.

i didn’t bail on you. i came back.

i do hard things so you don’t have to. i know i’m a monster.

you turned me into the worst possible version of myself. 

the next time i see you, i’ll kill you. and that’s a promise.

i know you think you don’t deserve this, but you’re wrong.

i want you to get everything that you want.

i think i love you too. i tried to fight it. because, hello.

i thought about dying. like a lot. like, “okay, at least there’s that option.”

you overstep until people suffocate.

you are only ever going to hurt me.

you know who i am. i’m you. remember?

danger is supposed to come with warning signs.

i don’t like you nervous. it’s unsettling.

look, it’s you. it’s always gonna be you. and i know you love me too.

i know you better than anyone. you want all this, not me.

so that’s what we do now, we just run away when things get scary. 

i don’t wanna run anymore. i just wanna be okay.

[4m1rz]

Pool Relieve

TripleS Yooyeon x Male Reader

Tags: pool sex, mommy kink, creampie

If you have the opportunity to be close with your favourite member in your favourite group, what would you do? How would you feel?

Well, this incident happens to Do Kangdae. He is a very huge fan of Kim Yooyeon since she was in the survival show, My Teenage Girl. He watched every single episode of the show until the final episode as she wasn't able to be in the debut lineup. He feels devastated as his favourite girl couldn't make it to the debut lineup as he puts his efforts in voting for her in every single episode.

One day, he scrolls on his Twitter account and sees a notification that Yooyeon will be joining a group called tripleS. And obviously, his feelings went to the roof and he's hoping that she will be able to debut. By the time when the group’s first subunit makes it debut, he is so enthralled especially since Yooyeon is in the sub-unit.

As the time passes by, it's already the comeback season with the group having a new sub-unit called “EVOLution”. Kangdae bought as many of the albums as possible, hoping that he'll be able to get the ticket for their upcoming fan meeting. Luckily for him, he received a message noting that he is invited to the fan meeting that's gonna be held on Saturday. This makes him feel very ecstatic.

Fast forward to the fan meeting day, he arrives at the venue of the fan meeting 3 hours before the event begins. Some WAVs, which is the fandom name for tripleS, can be seen outside the venue. When he enters, more fans can be seen, waiting for the fan meeting event to start. He then goes to one of the seats that are still available before sitting on it and starts to make conversations with those who are sitting beside him.

Three hours later, the fan meeting event begins. All members in the subunit “EVOLution” walk one at a time towards the center of the stage. This causes an eruption of cheers coming from the fans. This includes Kangdae, but his eyes are only focused on the only member that gets his full attention, which is of course, Kim Yooyeon.

After some interactions and performances from the members, it is time for the fans to meet and greet with one member at a time. All of the fans, including him, start to line up before interacting with every member. As he lines up, he noticed the arrangement of the members and was shocked to see that his ultimate bias is the first one.

A few minutes later, it was his turn to interact with Yooyeon. He sits on the chair while facing her and starts greeting her. “Hi there. May I know what your name is?” She asks. “Y-Yeah, s-sure. My n-name is Do Kangdae. Nice to m-meet you.” He answers, despite the multiple stuttering as he's really nervous.

His reaction causes Yooyeon to giggle a little as she finds it cute. “I wonder… if you are this nervous because of me?” She asks him while being curious. This makes him feel a bit more embarrassed and also guilty at the same time. “S-Sorry, I didn't mean it… in a bad way. I am indeed n-nervous… because I'm facing my ultimate b-bias right now.”

The statement from him makes her gasp in amazement. “Oh really, I'm your ultimate bias? Since when?” She excitedly asks which makes him blush even more. “Erm, it was since when you're still in that show, ‘My Teenage Girl’.” He answers, which leads to her gasp yet again. She wouldn't guess that someone has been her fan from when she was in that survival show up until now. They both had a bit more conversation before he was forced to move to the next member.

After that, he goes to meet and have a conversation with the other members. This time, it went out pretty smoothly than during his conversation with Yooyeon. After he finished, he went back to his seat and waited until all the other fans had finished meeting every member. Once all fans have done the meet and greet session, the members then resumed with the performance. During the last performance, he noticed that Yooyeon gave a wink in his direction.

This causes the fans in that particular place to start to cheer loudly. However, he feels as if she is winking to one particular person, but isn't sure whether it's actually for her fanpage or him. After a couple of minutes later, it's the end of the fan meeting event. All of the members then line up into a straight line before bowing down and thanking the fans to join the event before leaving the stage, one member at a time.

This causes the fans to slowly exit the venue, which includes Kangdae. As he was about to exit the venue, he got stopped by two bodyguards that were behind the members earlier. He feels scared at that moment as he thought he did something back then. However, one of the two bodyguards says that two people want to meet him backstage. He just agrees and follows the bodyguards backstage.

As he and the bodyguards arrive backstage, he is shocked to see Yooyeon and another lady who he believes is the group's manager. Then, the manager asks the two bodyguards to let only the three of them be in the room, to which the bodyguards comply and leave the room. After that, she starts to explain what is actually happening.

“Greetings. I'm Boo Chowon, the manager for not just this subunit, but also the whole tripleS…” The manager first starts introducing herself to Kangdae, which indeed concludes his thought of her being the manager. “…I'm so sorry that I drag you here, but Yooyeon has something to talk about to you.” She continues talking before turning her attention to Yooyeon.

As he and the manager look at Yooyeon, she chuckles a little before talking. “Well, I asked Chowon unnie earlier if I can make you my own personal manager.” She says, looking at him. That statement makes him stunned, which makes her giggles even more seeing his reaction. “...but before that, I want to apologize to you first…” She continues talking, but her sudden apology makes him confused.

“You see, I once encountered your fanpage about me on Twitter. I was so amazed to see someone supporting me since that survival stage era. However, I also… accidentally saw your personal account since there's also the link for it and I accidentally clicked on it. So, I'm so sorry yet again.” She continues explaining while putting her hands close as a sign to apologize. The first thing he did after hearing her explanation was to grab her hand and push it down.

“I-It’s fine. Besides, I actually wanna put the link for my personal account on the fanpage account as I want to have more fans as my friends. I didn't expect my ultimate bias would encounter that fanpage.” He says and chuckles, which makes her sigh in relief and smiles. “So, is this why I'm being your personal manager? You're hoping to compensate for your mistake?” He then asks her.

Just before she is able to answer the question, Chowon cuts her through it. “Basically that, but also because she grows fond of you because of how strongly you've been supporting her. After seeing you just now during the fan meeting, she constantly talks about the topic of letting you be her personal manager to me.” She says, which makes Yooyeon nod before covering her face with her hands. This reaction of hers makes him chuckle a bit more.

“Well then, I accept the offer of being her personal manager. This is a once in a lifetime experience, but I promise I'll do my best to be a great manager to Yooyeon.” He says and gives a salute to the two ladies. Chowon nods while Yooyeon giggles to see that response from him. “Ok then, your job starts right now, after I leave the room right… now.” Chowon says and leaves the room after, leaving just him and Yooyeon.

“I guess we will introduce ourselves first then. I'll start. My name is Kim Yooyeon. I was born on 9th February 2001 and I live in Seoul. I studied at Ewha University, so you might know my nickname then, right?” She introduces herself and gives a wink to him at the last part. “I guess it's my turn then. My name is Do Kangdae. I was born on 8th June 2002. I was raised in Busan, but now I'm living here in Seoul. I study at Yonsei University, in a sports science program. Pleasure meeting you.” He properly introduces himself to her.

“Ah, so I'm your noona then?” She asks, to which he nods. “Did you go to the gym a lot?” She asks again and he responds back with a nod. “Ah, no wonder you have this buff physique, yet you are being shy earlier at the fanmeeting.” She says while giving a teasing smirk which makes him scratch the side of his head in embarrassment.

“Now, I guess you wanna ask me to stay at the dorm. However, I believe my place and your dorm is around the neighborhood.” He says. His statement shocks her as if he knows what she just wants to ask him. “So noona, wanna go to your dorm now?” He asks her, to which she nods. They then walk towards his car and start going towards the dorm of tripleS members.

After several minutes later, they arrive at the dorm. “Well, we're here. I'll see you tomorrow then, my new manager.” She says. “Yeah, sure. Want me to-” He replies, but stops as he feels his cheek get kissed by her before turning his head towards her in a shocked expression. This makes Yooyeon giggles and smirks. “See you, handsome.” She says again before getting out of the car and going towards the dorm building. He is only able to shake his head, feeling disbelief on the action she did earlier before starting to drive back home.

That's how Kangdae became from being just a fan to being one of the tripleS managers, but specifically, the manager of his ultimate bias. He has been doing what his job suggests, planning her schedule with the company and accompanying her in her activities. However, despite all this, it seems that she also pampers him by buying him stuff and not letting him pay for it, even if he tells her that he wants to pay for it. This also results with them being a lot intimate and secretly being a couple.

This situation also seems to be the change of the dynamics between them. One day, he jokingly said that he should call her ‘mommy’ instead of ‘noona’ due to her acting like one towards him. He thought that she would feel disgusted with it, but instead she had this wicked grin visible on her face. “Oh really? Well, I don't mind it. Besides, you sound so sexy saying that word, Kangdae.” She says and gives him a sultry wink. This change of dynamics also results with both of them able to have their own personal fun and fulfill their sexual needs.

Fast forward to today, which is October 25th, they have finished with the Australia World Tour and every member and staff have some free time to spend before going back to Korea. Kangdae has been planning to just go to the nearest bar and just have some drinks. However, as he is going to the bathroom to clean himself, his phone starts to vibrate multiple times. He then checks the phone to see several messages from Yooyeon.

[Mommy Yoo❤️]

Meet me at the hotel private pool at 8.00 p.m.

Don't be late, or mommy would punish you 😉

-

He chuckles seeing her messages, knowing that her threats were always a bluff. However, he thinks that it would be a good idea to be able to hangout with her as they both have been busy for the 3 days of the world tour. He also thinks whether he and Yooyeon would do some naughty stuff or not later on.

Later on, he arrives at the hotel’s private pool which is located quite far from the hotel rooms. He scans around the place and sees someone already in the pool. He walks closer towards the pool to see that the one asking him to come to the place has already been waiting for him at the poolside, wearing a black swim dress with white ribbon straps.

“Hey there, my beloved noona.” He says, indicating her of his arrival. This makes her tilt her head, seeing him which then she gives him a naughty grin. “You're late, baby. You make mommy wait for you for 5 minutes. You really want mommy to punish you?” She says while adding a smirk after the last sentence.

Her statement makes him chuckle a bit. “Oh please, mommy… We both know that your threats of punishing me is always a bluff. By the way, I see that you've dipped in the pool, huh?” He says and also asks as he notices the swim dress that she's wearing is already wet, to which she nods.

“Yeah, I went for a swim just now, just waiting for you to arrive.” She retorts back and gives him a playful glare which makes him chuckle even more. “Now, do you want to join mommy in the pool or not?” She asks him once again to which he nodded.

“Great then. Now take off your clothes.” She says to him before plunging herself into the pool once more. “Really mommy? Do you really want me to take off my clothes right here with you looking?” He asks, trying to argue. “As if you haven't done that in front of mommy before, baby…” She retorts his argument and gives him yet another smirk.

He sighs in defeat before starts taking off his clothes until he is left with just his swimming trunks. As she notices a slight tent forming at his swimming trunks, this makes her to smirk even more and looks intently at his crotch region. He notices where she's looking at which makes him chuckle and mumbles the word ‘naughty’. Then, he gets into the pool and joins her by hugging her close.

“It's been awhile since we get to be like this huh, mommy?” He asks which she nods as an answer. They stay in that position for another 10 minutes before he feels her grinding her crotch region with his.

“Mommy, are you horny already? I thought you wanted us to go for a swim first.” He taunts her. There's no reply from her other than soft moans coming out from her mouth for 5 minutes. After that, she tries to answer his question despite her still moaning and grinding.

“Mmmmh, I am, baby… After all, w-we haven't been with each… mmmh… other. Mommy believes t-that you also want me r-right now.” Her answer makes him chuckle and shake his head. After that, he slithers one of his hands towards under the swim dress until he feels her pussy. Once he feels her pussy, he starts to rub it which makes her moan a bit louder.

“Mmmmh, t-that’s it baby. G-Gosh, this is just only y-your fingers, what if it's your dick inside me, mmmmmh…” She exclaims. Then, she responds by moving her left hand towards the inside of his swimming trunks until she reaches his dick and grips it before slowly stroking it. This causes him to groan softly yet hoarsely right towards her ear.

As things getting heated between the two with them pleasuring each other, he couldn't wait to fuck her which makes him to stop rubbing her pussy. This makes her confused as she was actually getting close to orgasm. “W-Why did you stop? Mommy's close…” She whines.

“S-Sorry mommy, but I can't wait any longer.” He exclaims. After saying that, he yanks his swimming trunks down a little to release his hard dick, then pulls up one of her legs before pushing his dick into her pussy. This causes them to moan due to the pleasure of both sexual parts and also the pressure from the pool water.

“Oh god, mmmmh… Mommy's pussy still feels so… tight. The water also makes the feel of your pussy even better, mommy.” He says. After a few minutes later, he pulls out his dick until his tip remains before pushing it back inside which leads to him thrusting inside her pussy. However, the pressure from the pool's water makes it a bit harder for him to thrust his dick.

“Mmmmh, I've b-been craving for this, baby. Mommy has been… mmmmh… waiting to get that dick of yours. So p-please, ruin mommy's pussy.” She says to him, the pleasure feeling seeps all over her body. Suddenly, he stops thrusting which makes her puzzled yet for another time. “B-Baby, why did you stop t-thrusting? M-Mommy wants m-more.” She whines.

Her whines didn't get any reply from him, instead he lifted her up a little which made her wrap her legs around his waist. Then, he carries her towards the pool wall and pins her towards it before resumes thrusting his dick inside her pussy, but a bit more harder. This action makes her squeal loudly as she didn't expect it.

“Oh, mmmmh… My baby is such a t-tease… Mommy l-loves it though… mmmmh…” She says, followed with laces of moans. As he is still thrusting, he lifts her a little and gets his hands to untie the straps of her swim dress. Once that is done, he tugs down the swim dress to reveal her modest tits before starting to play with them.

“Mmmmh, mommy loves it when you play with my tits, baby. It makes mommy… mmmh… even more aroused.” She says gleefully. This makes him attack her tits even more, with the combination of sucking, groping, tweaking and biting while still thrusting his dick.

After 5 more minutes later, both of them are at the brink of cumming. He really wants to cum inside her as it's been their habit of finishing their sex session. However, he thinks that he should get her consent to do so which makes him do just that.

“M-Mommy, I'm c-close. Can I c-cum inside you, mmmmh?” He asks. Her reaction is to just nod aggressively before answering him. “M-Mommy is close t-too. Luckily, today is mommy's safe day, so y-you can cum i-insi- oh gosh, mmmmh!!!”

As soon hearing her answer and not letting her finish it, he unloads all of his cum deep inside her pussy which triggers her to cum as well. After he believes that he has fully unloaded his cum deep inside her, he slowly pulls out his dick as well as lifting her. This causes a little bit of their mixed cum to spill out from her pussy.

Then, they both hug each other once more for another 5 minutes to relax themselves before she suddenly hits his chest playfully. “Yah, you're such a naughty boy. You didn't notice mommy that you're about to cum.” She says which makes him chuckle. “Hehe, sorry mommy. I was so eager to hear your approval that I just cummed on the spot and forgot to tell you. Well, you did like it didn't you, mommy?” He answers back.

His answer makes her giggle and shake her head. “Yeah, I miss this feeling of you cumming inside me. Now, shall we have a swim this time?” She says to which he answers with a nod. Then, they let go of the hug before fixing their garments; or more so taking off the remaining clothes left which makes both of them skinny dipping. After that, they start to do swimming and playing in the water before leaving an hour later.

P/S: Welp, the inevitable incident has happened... Idk why, but that photo really fuels me up to make a smut for her even if I don't want to 🥲. Still, I hope you all enjoy reading it

[scorpioriesling]

haii I just wanted to know if we'd get a little Drake pov for Temptation Island 😝

Temptation Island - Episode 8

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Pairing(s): Xaden, Liam, Ridoc, Bodhi, Dain, Garrick, Sawyer x reader

Warning(s): none

Summary: Four couples come to Temptation Island to test the strenght of their relationships -- relationships built on rocky foundations, that is. Will these couples survive? Will these individuals be tempted during their stay on the island, or stay true to their partners? Only readers decide -- find out what happens next in this juicy, dramatic series!

SR’s Note: Omfg not everyone wanting Bodhi to leave! Noooooo... however, I can agree that we all know where his heart truly lies. <3 I hope you enjoy the way you voted... lol I'm kidding but pls don't kill me for this one!! (I'm secretly giggling and kicking my feet over this episode... dare I say, the best episode yet??)

Tags: @rcarbo1 @lilah-asteria @whyucloudingmymind @bookofriverr @kitsunetori @velarisdusk @nctsawrus @lreadsstuff @paintedbyshadows @woollybread786 @invisiblepixies @freakishfandomfiend @littleemissperfecttt @luvly-writer @fiahtheteaaddict @loveofmychips @bodhidurrans @notnowkittenwhisker @emmiwolfsworld @acourtofbatboydreams @lanamyersismywife @bookishbishhh @w1ngsofwax @juliaboudewijn @bangtanxberm (inbox me or comment if you'd like to be added!)

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Episode 7

You were entering your final weeks at the villa -- two, to be exact. Just two more weeks in paradise, two more weeks hanging out with everyone, and two more weeks with Garrick.

You could only pray there'd be more than that.

What you would not miss as much were the bonfires, like the one you sat before now. Though you did enjoy wearing a new outfit each time, and you did enjoy talking and figuring out what direction you were headed in with Mark, you didn't so much enjoy watching the man you once told you loved get in good with another woman.

And you absolutely hated watching (most) of the other girls go through the same agony.

Your segment in tonight's bonfire was short -- once again, you watched as Drake went out with Mira, divulging things to her he'd never had with you. He discussed a future with her, which hurt your heart as the conversation hadn't really ever been brought up between the two of you either. As painful as it was to admit, you didn't like that the topic was still on the outs with Garrick too.

Violet, once again, got the worst of the evening. All of you colelctively watched as Halden bounced from woman to woman, not caring enough about any of them to want to get to know them beyond the physical level. What did give you hope in humanity was when one of the girls (maybe Rhiannon?) put Halden in his place. The video segment ended with Rhiannon questioning how Halden is still claiming loyalty to Violet while behaving this way, and Halden not really having an answer.

What was even more brutal than all that, was watching the tears Violet had been holding in for months stream down her cheeks.

"Where do you find yourself going from here?" Mark asked, pausing to allow Violet to collect her thoughts. Cat pulled VIolet in for an embrace, hoping to calm her down. Violet sniffled, batting at the inky, black, mascara-ridden tears falling from her eyes.

"I... I don't know," she said softly, sniffling again. "I just... I can't let myself give up on him, after all we've been through together, but... seeing things like this, I mean, it hurts," she sighed. Mark nodded.

"I can see why; he claims loyalty while sharing his body with other women," Mark sympathizes. Violet only nods. "Do you think after all you've seen, all you've watched him do while you've been nothing but loyal -- do you think you'll be able to stay with him after this?"

Violet sucked in a breath, straightening as she composed herself.

"I... think it's something I'll have to think about."

Mark nodded, effectively giving her the time to calm herself down. He moved to Cat next, and everyone watched as yet again, Traeger remained faithful to her. He had to go on dates with the other girls, of course -- but it was more of a friendly hangout, than anything. That also gave you hope for humanity, and the fact that Cat had been doing the same in the girl's villa.

Sloane was last, and though her's was not as brutal as Violet's, you still felt for your friend all the same.

"I still love her," Jack said into the camera, and Sloane scoffed. You side-eyed her as Jack continued on, talking about how much he still cared for Sloane and avoiding Mark's questions about his cheating. By the time the screen went black, Sloane was shaking her head.

"So... he obviously declined to comment when I asked about the cheating," Mark began. Before he could continue, Sloane was raging.

"What the Hell is wrong with him? Saying he still loves me after effectively getting into a new relationship, when we established rules?" Her voice broke on the last word, and you watched as her throat worked to withhold the emotion in her voice. "He's shit, I'm sorry but he is -- how is it fair to treat someone like this, and still expect to come home to them at the end of the day?"

You didn't hesitate this time in embracing her. A tear slid down her cheek, dripping from her jaw onto her crossed knee. Her shoulders shook as you held her, wishing you could take away your friend's pain and replace it with every happy thought and feeling.

Mark cleared his throat after a few moments, once the bonfire had quieted once again.

"It seems that there is a lot you wish to say to these men," Mark began. Sloane started, muttering something about even calling them that.

"You'll have the opportunity too, as well. Soon, you'll each be given an iPad -- you can choose to record a minute-long video, expressing your feelings for your partner to watch. If you choose not to record, that's totally understandable too. I want you all to know that the guys have been given this option too -- mainly as a way to express yourselves to one another before the final bonfire in a couple of weeks."

You all nodded silently in understanding. It was getting harder and harder the closer you came to the end of the retreat to hold your tongue -- but honestly, what would you even say? Did Drake even deserve to hear you out, or take up another minute of your time?

The four of you had left the bonfire and gone to bed quietly that night. You tossed and turned in bed, wishing you could focus on anything other than the option of recording and of course, Garrick. What was he doing right now, anyways? Gods, you wished you could have him here, in your bed, holding you. Just the thought of it made you feel safe, feel warm and wanted -- feel loved.

The thought was so jarring that you bolted upright, panting as your spine stiffened. In that moment, you'd come to a conslusion; and you knew, for your sake, it was the right one.

✧･ﾟ: *

The following morning, everyone was sharing in a peaceful breakfast when Mark entered the villa. He was greeted with a mix of warm smiles a shocked expressions, which was expected as his presence was rather unexpected today.

"Good morning everyone," he said, waving to everyone. Cat set down her juice in front of her, and Violet watched him with a worried expression. You couldn't help but do the same.

"I've come this morning with a request," he said, tone shifting into something much more serious. "With us being in the final two weeks of the retreat, it's becoming more and more important who you spend time with."

You glanced to Sloane, who studied you with wide eyes.

"I'll be asking for another house cut -- a name of someone you'd like to send home. You have fifteen minutes to discuss, and give me the name of the male you'd be okay with sending home from the island."

You stood at this, and Violet's jaw dropped at the ask.

"Fifteen minutes? Seriously?" You asked. Garrick stared up at you from his seat next to you, watching as you frowned at Mark. "We've all gotten so close in the villa... how can you expect us to choose-"

"One name. Fifteen minutes. Please," Mark said in finality, motioning for the guys to stand and follow him out. You scoffed, and Sloane rose to stand too. Garrick rose, meeting your eye before turning slowly to follow Mark out. Once all of the males filed out of the outdoor patio, you threw your hands up.

"What the Hell! This is the stupidest thing," you raged, and Violet only looked at you. Cat shook her head, and Sloane began to pace.

"I agree it's a bit... abrupt," she said, her long blonde braid swinging over her shoulder. "Didn't Sawyer like, just get here anyway?"

"Yes," Cat says, rubbing her temples. "It's odd to ask us to cut someone right after a new arrival has joined."

"Not just weird," you griped. "This is rediculous."

"Well, we have to choose someone to go, or-"

"Oh what?" Sloane snapped. Cat sighed, and Violet spoke up.

"It's in their contracts to leave as they wish," she said softly. All eyes turned to her at the new information. "I suppose if we don't pick someone, Mark would ask one of them to leave voluntarily."

Your eyes narrowed to slits.

"And, how do you know all this?" Sloane demanded. Violet swallowed, her cheeks flushing pink.

"Xaden told me," she answered, picking up her water glass and sipping once more. Cat shrugged, turning to you and Sloane again.

"Okay, so then... who do we pick?" She asked. Sloane crossed her arms.

"Not Dain," she insisted. "Anyone but Dain."

"Or Garrick," you chimed in, surprised how quickly you were ready to defend him. The new feeling was so foreign, so odd within your chest -- but you couldn't say you despised it.

"I'd like to keep Xaden around too," Violet requested over the rim of her glass. Cat sighed, counting the rest of the guys off on her fingers.

"Okay, so that leaves... Liam, Sawyer, Ridoc, and Bodhi." She shrugged. "Who stays?"

"I feel like since Sawyer just got here, it's unfair to let him go so quickly," Sloane strategized, seeming sorry for the newest island member. You'd hate to see him get booted off so quickly too, if you were being honest.

"I agree... and Liam, he's become such a dear friend of mine," Violet admitted. You hadn't realized how close the two of them had become, but ashamedly, you'd been more focused on a different male to have likely noticed.

"I feel the same way, but for Ridoc," you spoke up, imagining the loss you'd feel without your closest friend's presence. The amount of times he'd been there for you, talked with you, and actually heard you out as a person and not just a cute girl on an island... it was humbling to imagine how upset you'd be with him gone.

Cat nodded, looking from Violet, to Sloane, to you.

"I think we have our decision then."

✧･ﾟ: *

Your breakfast rolled in your stomach as you watched Mark approach again with the guys. 15 minutes, on the dot, as promised. You were not exactly happy about the decision made today -- but, if not this decision, who else?

"Ladies -- glad to see you all again. Have we reached a decision?"

Cat looked to you, and Sloane opened her mouth to speak. You were glad for that; you weren't sure if you'd be able to be the one to send this temptation home.

"Yes," she said softly. Garrick studied you, but youcouldn't meet his eye. Sure, you still had all those feelings to work out -- but, he had to know that at this point, there was no way you'd be sending him home.

"We... after careful consideration, we..." she stuttered, not wanting to admit to the choice herself. "We're going to be sending home Bodhi, today."

A few of the guys audibly gasped when Sloane announced the decision, seeming rather surprised that Bodhi would be the one chosen. Garrick looked surprised, though relief seemed to overtake Xaden's expression as he realized he'd be staying. Dain simply studied Sloane, trying to read the hurt in her face.

Bodhi stood ever still, his spine ramrod straight as he looked side to side. Emotion welled in your throat as he looked to Ridoc, pure terror on the other boy's face. You felt as though you'd cry when he did finally look at you, a small apologetic smile on his lips.

"Bodhi... we-"

"It's alright," he interrupted, stopping you. You would thank him for that, amidst a hundred other things as your voice was threatening to break under the pressure. His eyes sparkled, and he glanced only once more at Ridoc before looking to Mark.

"They had to choose one, right? This time, it's me." His shoulders sagged, and Mark nodded sympathetically.

"We're so sorry to see you go," Mark said, looking toward the villa. Bodhi stalked forward, making his way toward the sleek white building. Your gaze was in your lap, unable to meet your new friend's eye when your gaze snapped up at the sound of a voice. A different voice.

"Wait -- wait," Ridoc said, breathless as he watched Bodhi heading for the villa. He looked at Mark, who raised his brows in encouragement.

"Yes, Ridoc?"

"Our contracts say... we can leave voluntarily," he said slowly, recalling one of the hundred documents he signed before arriving on the island. Mark nodded.

"Indeed. Any time, no reason required."

Ridoc swallowed. He looked to you, sighing as he prayed you'd understand. Your eyes began to well with tears, fearing the absolute worst to come next.

"Then... I'd also like to leave. Voluntarily," he added. A flash of surprise crossed Mark's face, and Sawyer gasped at the news. You stared wide-eyed up at your friend, tears coming quick and fast.

"You may do as you wish," Mark answered, nodding in understanding. You covered your mouth with your hand, hating how hot the tears felt as they slid over your cheeks. Ridoc stalked toward you in a matter of seconds, his hands bracing your upper arms.

"Hey... hey," he cooed, kneeling to look you right in the face. Your shoulders shook as you cried, your vision so blurred that you could barely make out Ridoc's features. He sighed, pulling you to his chest and wrapping his arms around you. You couldn't help the tears now falling onto his shoulder, or the muffled cries against his chest.

He stroked your hair, urging you to calm down. A single tear slipped from Cat's eye as she watched the whole thing, feeling shocked and surprised and sad for her friend. Sloane watched in horror, not realizing the island would lose one wonderful candidate today, but two.

"I hope you understand," Ridoc whispered, his voice raw. You pulled back, sniffling as your nose began to run. He gazed into your eyes, hope and sadness filling his. You nodded once, before pulling him back in for the most bone-crushing hug you'd given since you'd arrived on the island.

"I do," you admitted, forcing yourself to understand why Ridoc had done what he did. If it were Garrick and you two had to be separated... you'd run after him too, wouldn't you?

"I understand, Ridoc."

He pulled back, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

"You're a great friend, Y/N -- the best," he said, emotion evident in his tone. "You're a real prize, and any one on this island can see it." He leaned in, softly kissing your cheek. He said only one more thing before running after Bodhi, calling out to him as he flanked the villa for the last time.

"I pity the idiots who can't, or never will. I wish you could see what I see in you, in yourself."

✧･ﾟ: *

It'd been two days. Two more long, agonizing days since Ridoc and Bodhi had left. Most of those days, you spent holed up in your room -- you were so upset to not be able to see your closest friend every day, so upset that you were upset because you also wanted him to be happy. Even if that happiness meant following the love of his life out the door, and away from you.

You'd read the letter nearly a hundred times over, needing time to redigest every harsh truth and detail he'd scrawled on the paper. The day Ridoc left, he'd left behind more than just sadness and emptiness -- he left behind a task for you. Monumental, you felt; though you knew it had to be done.

Sloane lifted your spirits on day three by waking you up with glee. She announced you'd be joining her on the beach today, though she didn't exactly ask, you agreed -- you knew you needed to get out of this villa, out of this God-forsaken bed, and back out into the sun. It didn't take long to shimmy on one of your favorite yellow bikinis -- it compliments your tan, Ridoc had once said -- and walk side-by-side with her to the beach.

After only an hour, you were grateful she'd made you go. Everyone was there, Saywer and Liam surfing, Xaden and Violet sharing a picnic on the sand, Cat tanning in a loungechair, and Dain bouncing a volleyball between him and Garrick. You were grateful for your sunglasses, as they didn't conceal what you'd been staring at.

"They're really something, huh?" Sloane mused. Though her sunnies were perched on her nose, you could follow her line of sight plain as day. You watched Garrick's back muscles flex as he reached for the ball, bumping it back to Dain again. Sighing, you responded.

"Yeah... not at all what I thought would be my outcome from my time here."

Sloane nodded in agreement.

"Totally; I think I always knew Jack was a little bitchboy, but not that big of a bitchboy."

You had to giggle at her comment. True, her (ex) boyfriend had shown his true colors, the same as Drake had shown his. You weren't worried, of course; your decision had become final. If anyone, it'd be Violet you were worried for -- you could only pray she'd give up on Halden for good, especially with someone like Xaden right there in front of her.

You weren't sure when you drifted off, but the gentle crashing of the waves must have lulled you in. With nothing but Ridoc's note still replaying through your mind, your eyes closed slowly, the image of Garrick messing around in the sand slowly fading out, until all you saw was darkness.

✧･ﾟ: *

Y/N,

I'm seriously trying not to cry while writing this, as I can't believe I'm really leaving the island and you in this moment. I don't have much time, since Bodhi and I's plane leaves in an hour. I needed to leave you with something, if only a simple letter, because you truly mean so much to me.

I love you, Y/N. You're a true friend, and someone I was so glad I met while on Temptation Island. I love that you are true to yourself, and I love that you care for others in your own, fantastic way. I love so many things about you, that at one point, I thought I could fall in love with you... but after these past few months, I've realized I can't, nor ever could.

I never thought coming here would mean finding it in myself to look further. I never thought I'd meet Bodhi, or fall in love with anyone period -- crazy how all of that turned out to be untrue, huh? Bodhi really snuck up on me, and after so much time together, I've realized what true love is. Not like the love I have for you as a friend, but the kind where you'd do absolutely anything for that person. No exceptions, no what-ifs. And for me, that is Bodhi (if that wasn't already obvious).

My point is, I want you to find that love, and I think you may have already. What Drake did sucks, but since your first date on the island, I think you and me both know that flame was ignited inside of you. No other dates were like the one you and Garrick had, and to be honest, it's clear he's very much in love with you too. I say this with all the love in my heart -- you're both idiots. You convince yourselves you're unworthy of eachother, when it's clear you're exactly what the other one needs. You both suck at communication (I'm sorry) but something has got to give.

In less than two weeks, you'll leave the island. I'd like to think we're still friends beyond this tropical getaway, but I'd also like to think that you'll actually do something with your feelings by then. I'd hate to get to know you out in the real world, only to find out you ended up with someone else like Drake again.

If I have one ask of you, it's this -- don't wait. Be honest with yourself, and with Garrick. I believe in you, and I know you can do this. I wouldn't have wanted to become your very best friend if I didn't at least have a little faith in you.

From,

Ridoc (:

✧･ﾟ: *

The walk to the small secluded area near the shore was chilly. An afternoon overcast had moved in, and your shadow was dulled against the warm sand as you made headway. You breathed deeply when the small table came into view, a wodden box sitting atop it. You found it comforting that your heartbeat remained steady, not necissarily caring whether Drake decided to record you a video or not. All the things he'd said hadn't matched his actions these past few months, and at this point, you were simply ready to move past it.

When you sat down and opened the box lid, you raised a suspicious eyebrow. Inside sat an iPad, surely with a video on it. Taking a deep breath, you powered the device on -- sure enough, an image of Drake appeared, a small play button in the bottom left corner.

Reluctantly, you clicked it, and Drake's form began moving.

"Y/N," he started, staring right into the camera. He was sunburnt, surely from all the hours spent with Mira beneath the rays.

"It's been a while since we've talked, but, I just wanted to get on here and tell you how much I miss you. And, how sorry I am."

You rolled your eyes at that, but kept watching.

"I did find a lot of what I saw at the bonfires disturbing -- I thought we established boundaries. I really feel like you allowing yourself to be close, both physically and emotionally, with other guys... it's completely tanked this relationship."

"You kissed Mira first, you bastard," you said aloud, shaking your head as the video drew to a close.

"However, I want you to know that I still care for you, and I wish we could work things out; we came here to test ourselves and end up together in the end, and that's exactly what I still want to happen."

You slammed the box lid shut as soon as the video ended, not wanting to see another second of him. What a cocky little shit, thinking after all that's happened that you'd still take him back? That you'd still want him back?

You grumbled and stomped your way back to the villa, wishing you hadn't wasted yet more of your time on him. If one thing was fucking clear, it's that you would not be leaving this island with him.

✧･ﾟ: *

Drake's POV

I was pretty eager to watch Y/N's video today, even if it was just her yelling at me the whole time. She always looked so sexy when she was mad, and every time she yelled, we'd always figure it out afterwards. This time would have to be different, though -- you can't always fix everything with sex, Mira had said.

Adrenaline coursed through me as I approached the box. Mark placed it beneath the clearing to a grove of palm trees, the perfect shady spot considering I was still burnt to a crisp. I practically ran to that small wooden thing,sitting quickly before unlatching and flipping open the lid.

It... was empty.

Empty?

I looked left and right, lifting the box to see if the iPad had simply fallen out. Nowhere, there was no iPad to be seen anywhere.

The fuck?

"Aye, Mark? Think you forgot my iPad," I called, though Mark had left our villa hours ago. Where the Hell was my video? Had Y/N really not recorded one?

Anger welled inside me as I stood, tossing the box into the sand. After all that work I put in to recording one for her, telling her I forgave her for being well... a slut since we arrived... she hadn't even given me one minute of her time to make one for me?

What a bitch, I thought, rolling my eyes and stalking back toward the villa. Mira, that cute little thing -- lay sprawled on a hammock, lazily twirling the end of her hair around her finger. She fixed me with an amused stare as I approached, registering my frustration.

"Shitty video?" She asked, not moving from her relaxed position. I huffed, running a hand through my hair.

"No -- no video, like, at all," I griped. She pursed her lips, shaking her head slowly at me.

"Well, then there's the answer you needed." She said, sighing and rising from the hammock. A small silver chain was gently clasped around her midsection, twinkling in the sunlight and contrasting against her dark purple bikini. She walked toward me, wrapping her arms around my neck.

"Let me help you feel better?" She suggested, pushing up onto the balls of her feet to whisper into my ear. Her chest pressed against me, and it took all my restraint not to bend her over right there. I sighed, my hands lightly tracing her delicious curves.

"Thought you said not everything can be fixed with sex," I teased, using her own words against her. She chuckled, her fingers toying with the edge of my waistband.

"Perhaps, this can," She suggested. Maybe she was right -- no answer was an answer. If Y/N really wanted nothing to do with me anymore, what was the logic in holding myself back from what i really wanted?

Wrapping my arms around her waist, I hoisted over over my shoulder. Mira shrieked in a cute, playful way -- trying, and failing to hold in her excitement as I carried her all the way up to my bedroom.

✧･ﾟ: *

You were alone on the beach, the tide barely kissing the tips of your toes in the late evening hour. The sun hovered just above the horizon, providing a warm afternoon glow to set the mood for the remainder of the day.

The sound of the waves crashing against the shore had calmed you. After earlier's iPad fiasco, it was clear where you stood with your former boyfriend -- and you knew more than ever that you needed to talk to Garrick.

Your opportunity for that came quickly, as his familiar voice greeted you from further up the beach. You turned, beckoning him closer.

"Mind if I join you?" He asked, flanking your side. You nodded wordlessly, the silent invitation being all he needed to stay. He stood beside you, studying your troubled expression and crossed arms as you stared out at the deep.

After a few minutes of silence, he broke it.

"How did the iPad recording go?"

You sighed. Of course he'd ask about it. You held your stare out at the blue, sighing before giving him a response.

"Horribly."

He nodded, swallowing as though allowing you to continue. When you didn't, he stooped down on one knee, his fingers pinching the surface of a shell the latest wave had just brought in. The two of you stayed there, listening to the ocean, him collecting shell after shell just to toss them back out into the water when he wasn't quite satisfied. After a long while, you couldn't take it anymore.

"He's just -- Drake is just so damn frustrating," you complained. Garrick started as though the sound of your voice startled him, but he continued on with his shell hunting. You continued on with your complaining.

"He has no consideration for anyone other than himself, and it's infuriating! He acts like our whole relationship fell apart because of me -- me! He's delusional, seriously. And..." you hadn't realized in your ranting how worked up you'd gotten. Your voice trailed off, and Garrick's attention was on you in an instant. He stood immediately, stuffing a hand in his pocket before gripping your biceps in his large hands.

"Hey, hey... we both know none of that is true, Y/N. You're wonderful," he said gently. The sun behind him bent around his frame, illuminating his curled brown hair in the most satisfying way. You sighed, looking down at your feet.

"I just can't help but feel like he's right. What if I am the reason my relationships don't last?" You said. Your toes had begun sinking into thne wet sand, and your eyes began to blue with unshed tears. "I mean, shit, I can't even figure this one out myself. It took Ridoc's advice just to guide me into doing what I couldn't do myself-"

"And I'm sure that doesn't help, not having him around anymore." Garrick empathized, his thumbs brushing your skin. "I know the two of you had gotten close."

You looked up at this, tears threatening to spill when your eyes met Garrick's. He sighed, pulling you to him as a small tremor racked your body. You allowed the tears to fall, letting out everything you'd been holding in for so long -- your anger at Drake, the hurt you felt not being honest with Garrick, the loss of your best friend here beside you. It all came out, spilling onto Garrick's skin. He took all of your emotion in stride, reaching a hand out to hold the back of your head to his chest.

With your cheek pressed to his pec like this, you could hear his heartbeat loud and clear. The rhythm was steady, grounding, and it calmed you down as you collected yourself once more. You realized long after your tears had stopped falling, the sound and rhythm was one you prefered -- enjoyed listening to.

You weren't sure that if you never heard it again, you could move on.

Peeling your dampened cheek from his chest, you stared up into his deep brown eyes once more. He studied you, a flicker of fear within those irises that you couldn't quite understand. Ridoc's words replayed through your mind once more, and you knew he was right. You needed to tell Garrick how you felt.

You'd never felt so confident until this exact moment.

"Garrick... I only have a week or so left here," you began. His hand stroked through your hair, and for once, he was quiet. "I've learned a lot since I arrived here... as you know... and I think since coming here, I've really been able to figure things out I didn't realize were so complicated."

He nodded. "Me too."

You swallowed, continuing. "I've realized how unhappy I was in the relationship I was in; I grew in that way. I also came to realize how valuable friendship is to me, and just how much it hurts when it's not there." You recalled when the girls were cross with you, how you'd hurt them which only in turn hurt yourself; and how relieved you were to gain back their trust.

"But most of all -- I've learned what love means. Love isn't nice dinners, or fancy cars and trips to the city." His eyes widened as you worked the words out. "Love is smearing fish eggs on one another; kisses beneath waterfalls, and chasing one another out into the rain."

His chest heaved as he worked to control his breathing, his eyes glistening as the reflected the golden sun. You swallowed, forcing yourself to finish.

"Love is something I don't think I had experienced before. Not until coming here; not until I met you."

A single tear slid down his cheek, and the emotion sent the waterworks spinning yet again for you. He smiled, a slow, lovely thing; and you couldn't help but reciprocate. His hand had moved to your jaw, his other at your waist. He guided you to him slowly, pressing you flush against him before his lips once again connected with yours. The kiss was slow, full of enough love and passion to keep you satiated for the rest of your life. His lips, so full and familiar, were ones you hoped you'd never have to miss.

He pulled back an inch, his cheeks wet with streamlined tears when he spoke.

"I'm in love with you, Y/N," he admitted. Your bottom lip quivered as you listened, almost not believing what you were hearing. "I've been in love with you since the first moment I saw you. It only grew when I met you, got to know you -- you're perfect, Y/N. I've never met anyone else quite like you, and I don't want to even try to after all this."

It was nearly too good to be true. You tugged him to you again, sliding your lips along his as the waves continued to crash against the shore. How, in a few months, had you fallen so hard? How, in a few months, had the utterly unexpected crept up on you, and become your whole world?

When you pulled back this time, he smiled down at you. You giggled, gazing up at his sun-kissed cheeks in admiration. He pressed a single kiss to your forehead before speaking one last time.

"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever met, Y/N. You're invaluably precious to me; and as scared as I was to take this final step, now I realize I could never let you go."

✧･ﾟ: *

Episode 9

[heytheresugardelight]

"Simple with you"

(Dark Cacao x Reader)

I - Luck

The snow broke your fall.

And you were extremely lucky that it only left you with little cracks on your left arm. You're also lucky that it hadn't been your dominant arm that got hurt. That leaves you with enough strength to gather dry wood for a fire and perhaps enough energy to start said fire. Normally you wouldn't be doing this early in the day, but with a fall like that you need to make sure your dough doesn't take any more damage. And that's not even mentioning the heavy snowfall that will surely rage on tonight. Shelter isn't a problem though, because after walking for a bit, you managed to find a small cave, big enough to hide at least four cookies for the night. Good for you and your backpack.

By the witches you hope you can find the Coffee tribe soon. Surely you need an actual healer to look over your arm, and you really need to put an end to Mocha Cookie and Cold brew Cookie's worries. Worries about wondering where you are, and if you manage to survive the journey to this kingdom. Well, there's no doubt that you've arrived near the kingdom, the endless snow is proof of that. If only you could get some directions, but alas, you're just wandering about collecting dry wood. Eyes searching your surroundings for any signs of wild beasts or a fellow cookie from a possibly nearby tribe. So far in your search, you found no such thing. Cementing the idea that you truly are alone in this corner of the woods.

At least, it almost did.

Because you could've sworn you heard something. At first, you thought it was nothing more than the wind, but you quickly realized that it's not possible. The sound you hear does not belong in the forest of winter winds and the growls of the wild beasts.

It truly is the sound of someone sniffling. Whether that'd be from the cold or tears or both, you have no clue. And it's all coming from the same direction, right beyond the barriers of tall bushes. Surely it wouldn't hurt to investigate, see if anyone needs help perhaps? The snow hasn't started its heavy downfall. Wait! No no. You are in unknown territory, what if this is a trick of a wild beast you know nothing about? Besides, you're already hurt, you have your own problems at hand and this doesn't really concern you. . .

But let's say it really is someone, then are you just going to turn your back on someone who needs help? You already know the answer. You wouldn't be able to sleep at night.

So in a move that highlights your lack of self-preservation instincts, you set the wood down and headed for those bushes. Your fear of the unknown stayed present, until you got some of the leaves out of your sight. Fear was replaced with an immeasurable amount of dread, you were right to look through the bushes. Because you can see a young cookie sitting in the snow of a small clearing, with one leg on the verge of crumbling. Then another moment of dread hits you when you see paw prints near your vicinity, not fresh prints but still there nonetheless. And the young cookie, he has tears running down his eyes that could freeze and hurt him more.

. . .

No, now is not the time for your hands to tremble. You caught yourself before you fell down a spiral, you raised both your hands to give yourself a light slap on your cheeks. It grounded you enough that you felt your legs start moving towards the cookie. You quickly fished out another roll of bandages from your pockets, followed by snapping a sturdy branch off one of the dead trees. Your actions weren't quiet and you quickly got the attention of the young cookie. You know this is the case because when you finally turned to look at the young cookie, he was shuffling away from you. Giving his leg more room to hurt.

"Please stay still, your injury could get worse." You whispered, loud enough to be heard by him but not loud enough to attract any dangerous beasts.

Your words do nothing to comfort the little cookie, because their red icing eyes are staring up at you with distrust. He continued to shuffle away from you while shaking his head. You didn't waver at this, instead you took one step forward and showed the roll of bandages you were holding.

"Wait please, I'm here to help you." You said again. A little softer in tone this time.

Another round of just staring at you with skepticism, and you can see in his eyes that he's debating whether to accept your offer or not. You tried not to show it, but you're getting more worried the longer his leg is untreated, you still keep your expression calm. It won't do you both any good if both are visibly distressed.

In the end.

The young cookie gave a little nod, the tension on his shoulders deflating. It gives you the little confidence you need to patch him up.

"Thank you." You told him before you started analyzing the leg. It's almost worse than the state of your own arm, the cookie is not going to be able to walk for a few days. They're also going to need more than a measly stick and bandages, but this will have to do.

"Can you straighten out your leg?" You asked, wanting to gage out how much pain he is in before applying the makeshift splint.

"I'll try." The young cookie spoke, voice fragile as a snowflake. There's a little struggle to get his leg in the position you needed, but with a little guiding, the you of you managed. He responded whenever it hurts and you were quick to apologize whenever you did so before going back to rolling the bandages around his leg and the stick. Once you were done, only then did you allow yourself a small little breath of relief.

"There. That should keep it steady until we get you a real splint." You sighed out.

The young cookie also started looking over his new splint, moving it around and being pleasantly surprised that the pain seemed to die down a bit. And while it'd be nice to take a break, you know it can't be over. That proved to be the case when you noticed the snowfall picking up. You turned to the young cookie and offered a hand.

"C'mon. We gotta go before the snow picks up."

The cookie looked up at you again, another scared expression on his face. Of course, you, a stranger, is practically asking him to come with you to somewhere he doesn't know.

"We're just going beyond those bushes and into a cave. We need shelter for the snow."

Your explanation seemed to work, because the young cookie accepted your hand, with hesitation. Then he's going to need a warning for what you're about to do next then.

"Now, I'm going to carry you to the cave okay? We can't have you putting stress on your leg. Are you alright with that?" You still asked, because if the young cookie isn't comfortable, you're okay to just lend your arms. As a test, you can see the young cookie tried standing up but when it just ended with you catching him before he could trip, you both made your decisions.

"Are you sure you can carry me?" The young cookie asks. You let out a small chuckle at this.

"Don't worry, I'm stronger than I look." You simply said, then you counted to three before carrying the young cookie. Surprisingly, he kind of weighs the same as your backpack. After getting through the hurdle that is going through the bushes again, you finally made it to the cave. The first thing you did after carefully setting the young cookie down was start a fire. You felt the young Cookie's dough when you held him and that amount of cold can't be good for someone who barely reached your hips. You collected the dry wood you were gathering earlier and set it in a small pile, and when you got a quick fire going, you began assembling your tea set. A warm drink should calm the trembling you're both going through.

Let's see, tea kettle, cacao nibs and your water supply. Good.

Just to be safe as well, you asked the cookie "Do you drink cacao tea?"

The little cookie gave an enthusiastic nod, saying "It's my father's favorite!"

You couldn't help but let out your first smile in a while at this. In the meantime, you set the tea kettle on the fire, and to your relief, the gesture is returned by the young cookie and he looks like he has gotten calmer. Now all that's left is to survive the cold. The snowfall had gotten a little stronger this time, and it prompted you to grab a spare blanket and wrap it around the young cookie. Alright, you need to get a name soon, it's rude to keep addressing someone like this even in your head.

"Thank you. Um. . ." The young cookie trails off, only then you realize that you haven't exactly given your name either.

"(Y/n) Cookie. And your welcome . . ." It was your turn to trail off and the young cookie quickly got the hint.

"Oh! Dark Choco Cookie! That's my name!" Dark Choco Cookie says with such enthusiasm that it's slowly letting you ease up as well.

"Well, then it's nice to meet you Dark Choco Cookie." You can't help but feel familiar with the name, but you just can't put a pin on it. Maybe it'll come to you later.

"(Y/n) Cookie? Your name kinda sounds different. Are you a traveler?" Dark Choco Cookie asks after sitting in the silence for a bit.

You gave nod of your head "I am. I'm actually on my way to see my family friends from the coffee tribe."

"Oh! I know the coffee tribe! I was there with my father! He said he had something to do there. I can show you the way!"

"Really?" You asked, needing to make sure that this kid knows what he's talking about.

"Really! My father taught me how to find my way there in case I got lost. But then I hurt my leg when I was trying to go there." Dark Choco Cookie looked down on his hurt leg. You have a feeling there's also more to this, since how did he wander off from his father in the first place? You'll have the answer to that later. You need to look at the brighter side of this.

"That's a relief! We can also get help for your leg there." You said, and you're glad that it got Dark Choco Cookie to cheer up.

"And then we can meet both of our families!" Dark Choco Cookie cheers.

"Right you are, kid!" You cheered back. This atmosphere beats a the dread that was from before and just in time too because the tea kettle started whistling, you were quick to work and pour the hot water on two cups with cacao nibs. Your tendency to pack spare cups really paid off here, even if you didn't expect to share tea with someone else.

You then grabbed the two cups and handed the other one to Dark Choco Cookie  "Here you go, careful it's hot."

"Thank you (Y/n) Cookie." Dark Choco Cookie then began blowing a little heater off the tea. It'll take few more blows before the tea is safe to drink but once you both got a good dip, you relished in the warmth the tea provided. This really hits the spot on a cold day. And it couldn't have been a better time to have tea either, since the snow started falling relentlessly. And now that your dough is a little more at ease, it must've encouraged Dark Choco Cookie to ask more questions about you.

"So where did you originally come from (Y/n) cookie?"

You didn't know it at the time, but you're in for a long while of talking

You've told three stories so far and you were finding fun in telling all of it. One was the time you and your little sister built a Zipline over a lake and giving your parents a heart attack, the second was a tale about how your brother nearly got struck by lightning because he was playing around with his sword during the rain. Then the third story is being told by you right now.

"No kidding!" Dark Choco laughs at the time you recounted that time your adoptive brother messed up tea. How? By accidentally putting salt instead of sugar.

"I know right? That was one of the worst teas I had the displeasure of sipping." You laughed at the memory of that moment, how all of your family collectively gagged at the same time when you all took the first sip. Then your brother walked in so confused and wondered why everyone was disgusted. Then he took a sip himself, and also gagged. That's when they all realized the mistake.

"We all had a good laugh about it though, and it did get the mother to start labeling the salt and sugar instead of just opening to see for ourselves." You added.

"Wait, you're meaning to tell me that they weren't labeled already? How did you not get confused before?" Dark Choco Cookie inquires, and you can clearly see a little grin on his face as he asked that.

"Well, for me I always just open the lid and smell it, I don't why it took them so long to label it. But if you ask me, I think they just keep forgetting."

"Hm, if you say so." Dark Choco Cookie says, and before another silence passed you. You took your chance.

"Alright, your turn! Any interesting stories from your family?"

At this Dark Choco Cookie thought for a moment, but then he shrugged his shoulders with a hum "There's not much to say, I mainly just train with my father when he has the time, and then I train some more. But I do get to join him sometimes when he's off to do his duties!"

That—that sounds a little concerning. The thought passes you.

"Is that so? All you truly do is train?" You asked, just to see if you can get more information.

"The people of the Dark Cacao Kingdom pride ourselves in our dedication to train, it's how we survive the harsh winters, the wild beasts that attack the tribes and the monsters that lurk beneath the depths of the Licorice Sea. It's our way of life."

"Hm, sounds like a strong kingdom." You noted out loud. Of course, you already knew about this, since your family friends spoke about it fondly when they visited your little village.

"It is, and I'm a proud warrior of it." Dark Choco said with unhidden pride. It's really something worth appreciating, it reminds of your time with Pu'er Tea Cookie, how she always tells you of the many ways to get strong in order to protect the little village you resided in. Even when that village no longer remains.

You took a small breath, now is not the time to ruin the mood with your grief. So you turned to Dark Choco Cookie with a proud grin that you always gave to your little sister whenever she does something amazing "And I'm sure you'll do wonders for your kingdom."

With your compliment in mind, you can clearly see Dark Choco Cookie go quiet, followed by a dark shade of his dough tinting his cheeks. You don't comment on it though, not like you need to anyway. He seemed to be aware of it when he looked away from you. Even more so when you said that it's probably time you get some sleep for the night and how fast Dark Choco Cookie agreed to sleep. Guess he's not used to letting people see his small embarrassment.

Much like how you're not used to letting people see you frown. It's not like you meant to at first, your brother did always say that you had one of those faces. The one where you look tired even though it's just how your face normally rests. 

It's gotten better over the years and you began to smile more and let it be your natural expression. It's just a shame that a simple ailment ruined all that progress.

Talking with Dark Choco Cookie had you smiling for longer than you normally would, so when you can clearly see the kid fast asleep, you let your face finally fall. You had a brush with grief today, and you're not going to let it fester you tomorrow. That's why you let it all out in a simple frown. A progress in itself, you can remember the times when just thinking about your family and little village sent you into uncontrollable sobs. It's gotten easier, but that emptiness still persists. And you're sure nothing will ever remedy this feeling, not even having to move in with Mocha Cookie and Cold Brew Cookie will fill that void, even when they are family and friends. No matter, whenever you're in doubt, just keep on going to see another day.

That's what your family would've done, and you shall do the same.

You looked over to Dark Choco Cookie after gathering your thoughts. He's still sound asleep as ever. Meanwhile you don't think you can get much sleep tonight. Someone has to keep the fire going for both of you, and you still have a little dry wood left to finish off anyways. The howling wind continues through the night, and you grab another blanket to wrap it around Dark Choco Cookie when you see him shiver a bit. Your brother was right. There's no such thing as too many blankets in the Dark Cacao Kingdom.

Let me know if you guys want more :3

[masonmontz]

hellooo everyone :) hope you like it

REMEMBER: english is not my first language

angst word count: 2,6k

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

Mason doesn't know when things started going wrong, but it's been a while.

Since that night.

The night a piece of Mason died, because before everything was beautiful and happy, and now he feels like everything is blue. Mason is not a melancholic person, but he doesn't know how to get out of it when no one is understanding what is happening to him.

“Hi, can you come to Manchester alone?” Mason asked his mother on the phone, and it was the first time in over a year that Mason had asked Debbie to come to him. Only her, because Mason needs a comfort that only Debbie can give him, the comfort that only a mother can give a child.

“I'm taking a train tomorrow” she replied and he nodded before hanging up, but not before answering several questions, and honestly Mason didn't want to answer any of them because he was too sad. 

Mason hung up the phone and went to the kitchen looking for something to eat, but he's a disaster at cooking and had no head to think, so he just picked up his phone and ordered Japanese food.

He wasn't really hungry, but if he didn't eat, he knew he would have terrible training tomorrow. Some days Mason just ate out of obligation, smiled out of obligation, talked because others talked to him, and he does everything like a robot.

Mason stood at the kitchen window and watched the rain falling outside. Winter was coming and Mason was going crazy, everything was strange, he finally returned to training after a few weeks injured, but not even that could make him happy.

Mason hasn't been able to feel happy for over a month. 

And he doesn't know when he'll be able to get over it.

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

“So, do you want to talk about it?” Debbie asked him the next day after he got back from training. She was sitting on the couch and Mason sat on the floor when he arrived, just to play with Ace for a bit. Debbie knew there was something very wrong with her son, Mason was silent, sad.

“Hum, yeah, of course, I just don’t know how” Mason sighed in frustration, for a month he has been mulling over the same thing in his head, surviving day after day, but he feels like he is about to explode. “It's hurting me, mum.”

Debbie felt sorry for him because he looked miserable. Mason sighed and lay on the floor, looking up at the ceiling above him.

“Let's start at the beginning, okay? Was it something between you and Y/n?”

Mason's heart sank when she spoke your name to him, because Mason had refused to talk about it for a month, and now he felt all the feelings rushing into his chest at once like bullets.

Debbie knew about you, you and Mason had only been together for a few months, but he seemed more in love than ever. 

“I was going to be a father” Mason whispered and the memory of that terrible night came rushing back to his head, a terrible place in his mind that he couldn't get out of on his own. “She lost our baby.”

“What?” Debbie couldn't hide her surprise and shock, because she didn't expect this. 

“It was my fault.”

Mason has been reliving that night in his head all the time, ever since he heard the doctor say the baby didn't survive. Mason remembers the feeling that was like several knives hitting him, he had never felt anything like it. Mason remembers the scene of you crying in the hospital bed, he can even hear the sobs when he closes his eyes, and that sound has terrified him every night.

“Why is it your fault, Mason?” Debbie asked, getting off the couch and sitting on the floor. Mason laid his head on Debbie's legs, feeling his heart ache as she stroked his hair, just like a mother does with a child. 

It was a very rainy night, Mason had an interview scheduled at Old Trafford and he decided he wouldn't go by car, as Bruno was also going and Mason asked to go with him. Bruno left first and Mason asked you to pick him up, but more than twenty minutes had passed and you still hadn't arrived, and Mason started to get worried, but he couldn't leave, because you could arrive at any moment.

But the only thing that arrived was a message from your number, but it wasn't you who wrote it. Mason's heart stopped at that moment as he read the message saying that your car had slid off the road and crashed, but you were fine, you just needed to go to the hospital because of the baby. 

Mason paid the Uber driver a lot more while he begged him to go faster because he was so worried he was biting his nails.

Shit, it was his fault, Mason shouldn't have asked you to pick him up in that heavy rain. Anyone knew it could be dangerous.

Mason ran through the halls after finding out which room you were in, and he sighed in relief when he saw you lying there without a scratch, but when you turned to head towards the door, Mason saw red eyes.

He didn't want to think the worst, but it was impossible.

“Hey, you good?” he approached, shaking, Mason's hands began to sweat. He was happy that you were alive, that you were okay.

You opened your mouth to respond, but a sob escaped your throat and you began to cry desperately. Mason sat on the hospital bed and hugged you, not caring that he was wet from the rain.

“How is our baby? Is everything fine?” 

Mason felt his heart break into a thousand pieces when you pressed your face against his chest and cried, and Mason felt trapped in a nightmare when he understood what had happened. You looked up and looked at Mason, you were inconsolable, suffering, and it was then that Mason realized that it was his fault.

“I lost- I lost our baby” he couldn't say anything, but you were squeezing Mason so tightly that he couldn't get away and get away from you. “I’m so sorry, Mason. I’m so sorry.”

Mason didn't know why you were apologizing. He didn't say anything, Mason didn't even let a tear fall, he couldn't cry when you were desperate in his arms.

“It wasn't your fault, Mason” Debbie said to Mason when he told her what had happened, and she wiped the tear that fell down her son's face. “Don’t say that ever again.”

“I shouldn't have asked her to pick me up, I should have taken an Uber or taxi and left her at home, safe.”

You would still be pregnant if it weren't for the car crash that caused you to lose the baby, and you wouldn't be sad right now, nor would Mason. And you wouldn't be separated either. You were going to have a beautiful baby, Mason thought it was a girl, and then he was going to have two of you.

Everything was ruined now, and it was all his fault.

Mason also can't forget your crying when he left you two days later like a coward, the guilt was consuming him and he accepted that you would be much better without him. He was a coward, Mason couldn't accept that he made you suffer like that, and that's why he decided to leave, so as not to cause any more damage to your life.

Mason didn't know what was worse, remembering you crying when you told him you had a miscarriage or when you were crying and begging him not to leave you. 

“Why did you leave her, Mason?” 

“Because I don't want to cause her any more suffering.”

“Mason, I'm your mother, and I'm not going to hide what I think about this. You're suffering, you think it's your fault but it's not, and I'm sure Y/n thinks the same.” Mason closed his eyes, it still hurt to think about it, and maybe it would never stop hurting. “I can't imagine your pain, losing a child is probably the greatest pain anyone can go through, even if the child hasn't been born yet.”

“But a mother's pain is probably greater, what if Y/n thinks it's her fault? Have you thought about that? I don't want to put any weight on your shoulders, but you left her at the worst moment of her life. She might be suffering much more without you than with you.”

“She's probably better off without me.”

“I'm only going to tell you this once. You know she loves you, that woman would do anything for you and I know you would do anything for her, don't ruin what was the best thing that ever happened to you because you're stubborn. I'm so sorry you lost a child, Mason, I'm truly sorry, it's a dream to be a grandmother again, but I'm not going to let you cry here alone when you could be by her side and you can get through this together.”

Mason cried. For the first time in a month he cried. Mason let out all the pain of losing his baby, crying eased the pain he had in his chest, but not the guilt.

Debbie let him cry and cried with him, because Mason was still her son and she didn't want to see any of her children suffer. She would let them all cry on her lap whenever they needed to.

“I don't want to make her sadder.” he confessed quietly and felt his mother's fingers in his hair. 

“You need to be with her, Mason, no one wants to go through this alone.”

“I think it was a girl.”

Mason could imagine a little girl running around the house, with hair the same color as him, but with your smile. She would definitely have your personality.

“I wish you had told me sooner that I was going to be a grandmother. I'm so sorry about that, Mason. I never wanted you to have to go through the pain of losing a child.”

“I feel like my heart has been crushed for a month.”

“Please go talk to her, she deserves an explanation and you don't deserve to go through this apart.”

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

You sighed when you felt a drop of rain fall on your face, walking faster to the entrance of the building where you live with some groceries in your hands. It still wasn't fast enough, because the rain got heavier and you got soaked as you tried to reach the building.

“Oh, Lord” you muttered to yourself when you reached the gate, and didn't even look ahead as you made sure no bags were ripped. 

You stopped when you saw Mason standing at the entrance of the building outside, staring at you. He was standing leaning against the wall, and you felt your heart race because you hadn't seen him in over a month. 

He had his hair shaved, and you knew it was because he took a hit to the head that caused him to get stitches. God, you loved him so much you could cry, and he was so beautiful and you hated him for leaving you.

Not even the rain bothered you at that moment, because you couldn't look at anything else but Mason. Mason pushed himself off the wall and walked towards you, but he called you to get out of the rain that had now left all your hair and clothes wet. 

“Hey” you said, handing the bags to Mason when he asked. “Do you want to come in?”

Of course, you couldn't help but notice the deep circles under his eyes, and Mason looked thinner than usual. You knew you looked just as bad as he did.

“If you don't mind, I want to.” 

Mason walked you to your apartment in silence, and you didn't know what to say. It was a surprise to see him there, it had been a terrible month and you still hadn't recovered. 

Mason put all the bags in the kitchen while you went to the bathroom to get a towel to dry yourself. Mason followed you when you went to your bedroom, and his desolate look on you warmed your heart, because you thought you were the only one who suffered with what happened, but Mason was there in front of you suffering.

“I'm going to take a shower” you mumbled and took off your clothes, knowing Mason was watching you. “Come with me?”

You didn't wait for Mason and went to the bathroom, turning on the hot water in the shower to take a long shower after the cold rain. You stepped into the shower and watched as Mason silently took off his clothes, and soon after he was in the shower with you.

“Why did you leave me?” you whispered looking at Mason. Mason opened his mouth to respond but he couldn't, he started crying and put his hands on his face. “Mason, it’s fine.”

“I’m so sorry, Y/n. I’m so sorry, please forgive me. It was my fault and-”

“What?” you asked, because you had no idea that Mason was blaming himself for what happened. “It wasn't your fault, what are you talking about?”

Mason knelt on the bathroom floor and wrapped his arms around your waist, crying into you as the hot water ran over you.

“I should have never asked you to come pick me, it's my fault, you lost our baby because of me.” God, you didn’t think you could feel this much pain. Mason had been blaming himself for a whole month, and you would never have let him go if you knew. You knelt in front of him and held his face in your hands.

“Listen to me, this wasn't your fault, it was an accident and accidents happen.” He shook his head and you rested his forehead against yours, hugging his neck. “Why did you leave me?”

“I didn't want you to hate me, I didn't want to make you suffer more.”

“I suffered more without you by my side.”

“Forgive me, please.”

“There's nothing to forgive, Mason. You lost a son too, I know this is hard for you too.”

“I shouldn't have let you go through this alone.”

“Never leave me again, please.”

“Never again, never again. I promise. I’m so sorry.” 

“I wish I was still pregnant.” you confessed, because it's true. You've lived very happy weeks since you found out about the pregnancy.

“I know, me too.” Mason left a kiss on your forehead and you held him closer to you. It was an intimate moment, two hearts hurting but finding healing together. “I love you, I’m so sorry.” 

“I love you, I’m sorry too.” you kissed Mason. “We'll get through this together, okay?”

“I'm sorry I was away from you for a month, you've been through hell alone.”

“Don't worry, you're with me now.”

You took a shower together, nothing more than small kisses, because you just wanted to spend time together. It was an important moment, Mason felt like he was forgiven even though he had nothing to be forgiven for, and you knew that now you could fully heal, Mason was once again with you.

Sometimes the bad times just show you that you're better together than you are apart, and Mason finally understood what his mum said, about healing together, and getting through everything together, both the good times and the bad times.

[sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth]

Last

(Sam Winchester x female reader)

Summary It was never supposed to happen. But this is the last time. It has to be. CWs Cheating (kind of the worst kind). Secrets. Grief. Temptation. Rated 18+ 1.1k words.

Sam Winchester masterlist ⏐ SPN masterlist

The sheets rustle behind you when Sam sits up, and from the way he sounds you can tell he’s leaning forward, long outstretched legs slightly angled, elbows resting on knees. You know the white sheet must have slipped off him far enough to reveal his chest, his arms, the tan skin and the hair on both, the feeling of it ghosting under your fingertips.

You know that he’s staring at the back of your head with those sweet, dark eyes. Guilt probably making him feel sick to his stomach as well.

You’re sitting on the edge of the bed and your hand goes up to wipe at the tears you started crying after you woke up. You wait for Sam to say something, but he doesn’t.

“This was the last time,” you say, not turning to him. Your voice sounds thick from the tears, but you don’t care. “I can’t do this anymore.” Sam’s quiet for a moment before he answers.

“I know,” he says.

“It’s not right,” you add, and he only repeats it. You bite your lip in the hope it will stop new tears from flowing.

“If he’s…” you start, but can’t continue, the thought too horrible.

“He can never know,” Sam says, voice final. Sam’s moral, always tries to do the right thing, but he knows how tremendously he has fucked up. He knows there’s no path that leads to being able to justify this, even if his brother is out there howling at the moon with Crowley. There is no explanation, nothing that can ever make this right.

So, he has decided, a lie is, in this case, the best and only solution. Because he could not stand it if Dean ever finds out. He wouldn’t survive it. And neither would Dean.

You turn around, look at Sam. In the low light of the room, Sam can see the glistening trail of tears on your cheeks. You’re naked, and somehow the bunker’s sterile light makes it look like you’re bathed in moonlight. Sam can’t stop his eyes from flickering down to your breasts, remembering how just a little while ago he wrapped his lips around your nipple and you arched up at him, ran your hand into the thick hair at the back of his neck to pull him closer.

He blinks a few times, tries to shake himself out of the memory. You are still looking at him.

“If he comes back… if we can heal him…” you start, but then stop again. It’s not like either of you hasn’t said the same thing a million times. Grief over Dean’s death and then relief that he wasn’t dead has thrown you both for a loop. You’ve both been on edge for weeks, too little sleep, too much caffeine. Too much fear. That you can’t get Dean back, or worse, that he will come back, but as he is now. A demon.

That he’ll come back and you save him and that he finds out.

It wasn’t until one night not so long ago that Sam decided he needed assistance to sleep, which was when you found him drinking in the library. Your first instinct was to stop him, but there was no point, so you joined him instead. You didn’t have the energy for anything else, not with Dean out there, doing God knows what. God knows who.

You want to scoff at yourself, at the fact that he is a demon and your biggest worry is that he is with other women. The thought of it, of the gold band on your finger not meaning anything anymore, that he is out there, back to his old ways…

No. No, you tell yourself, don’t lie. Is that really your greatest worry? That he’s sleeping around? Or are you just trying to justify what you have been doing? Trying to justify why only an hour earlier you were on your back, ass at the foot of the bed, body covered in a sheen of sweat, one of your legs hooked over Sam’s elbow while your husband’s brother fucked you without abandon?

Is this the payback? The payback for what Dean might be doing? Not even Dean. This demon inside of him. You don’t want to think like that, don’t want to be this petty, but your brain keeps grasping at things to justify yourself. All it lands on is the image of your fingernails scratching down Sam’s thick biceps, begging him to fuck you harder while he lowers his head to suck a mark into your neck in response.

A mark. The irony isn’t lost on you.

Neither of you is sure who made the first move that night in the library, who cracked first. Who was more desperate, lonelier. Maybe it doesn’t matter. Maybe you stopped caring the moment Sam pushed you down on the table, held you in place and slammed himself into you, your mind blissfully emptied by the fullness he provided.

You’ve ended up like this most nights since. You both tell yourselves you need this, that it helps you focus. It’s a lie. You don’t know what it is.

The good thing, and the horrible thing at the same time, is that it’s the only time you don’t think about Dean. Not the bad parts, not the good parts. And maybe that is the real betrayal. That you and Sam are together, the two people closest to Dean, who are supposed to love him the most, and you don’t think about him. You only think about each other. Bodies moving in the dark, gasps and moans and heads filled with nothing but the want for more.

Sam is sitting there, beautiful and sad. You swallow and then you crawl onto the bed. Kneel naked before him, chest rising and falling slowly.

“This was the last time,” you say, just like you do every night. Sam nods, and then he reaches for you. Drags you towards him, runs his hands all over, your lips meet, roughly, desperately.

This is the last time, you repeat in your head.

His fingers find your wetness and you work yourself down on him while he watches you, sees your face contort and your body squirm. He wonders if you look the same when Dean touches you, and then he stops thinking about anyone else, fills his mind with you.

This is the last time.

You ride Sam, him sitting up, large hand splayed over your back. The other hand goes up to brush your hair out of your face and the gentleness of it nearly undoes you.

This is the last time.

One of these nights, it will be. And it will be because Dean is back, because you’ve saved him. The other option is too horrible, too terrifying. You can’t think about it.

But then Sam makes you forget and you make him forget and at least for a little while, you are free.

[azrielbrainrot]

I Laugh Like Me Again... She Laughs Like You - Part 7

Pairing: Azriel x F!Reader

Description: The time to restore your memories has finally come.

Warnings: Violence, Death (well not really)

Word Count: 4600

Notes: This is the moment of truth, our girl finally gets some answers. Hope you enjoy!

Part 6 ○ Part 8

It hasn't even been a full day since you killed Norris in that dark cell, but you've never felt better. The moment his heart stopped beating, you started breathing easier. It felt like the weight of the world fell off your shoulders, and knowing you will never have to kill or hurt someone at his orders brought you an amount of relief you never thought you would be able to feel. The days of stretching yourself thin to do his and the guild's bidding at the cost of your conscience were finally gone, you truly couldn't believe it.

You weren't so naive to think the guild would allow you to walk away so easily after not only deserting and sharing classified information about the organization, but also killing one of their best members. They would surely send out assassins to find and kill you, to silence you lest you tell the courts of Prythian too much about them - this is precisely how the guild has managed to survive in the shadows for so long after all, by disposing of any possible threat to the organization. But, with the backing of the Night Court and Azriel's endless support, you didn't feel so threatened, especially after witnessing their power and resilience while helping you with this whole situation. Rhysand has also already gotten more than enough information from Norris' mind to give you enough of an edge. Most of all, you weren't alone for the first time in your life.

The only thing that was still missing were your memories, the main part of the plan and the exact reason you were currently sitting in this foreign room while the High Lord prepared himself to enter your mind and destroy the spell keeping them locked out of your reach. You've been told this was the room you and Azriel had shared in the townhouse before you passed. An interesting choice made by the High Lady for such a somber spell to occur in, though you understand the sentiment behind her decision. With some luck, this place could act as a jumpstart to the process if needed. It would also be good for you in case regaining your memories somehow erases the recent ones.

If it were up to you, this would have happened right after Norris was killed, it could have been in that same damp and bloody cell for all you cared, but Azriel and the others insisted on waiting, letting you and Rhysand rest your bodies and minds before attempting such a delicate procedure.

Azriel also had to go and find the witch's tool Norris used, although that had taken him less than an hour since Rhysand had stolen that information directly from Norris' mind, and he had been back before you even had the chance to finish bathing. Apparently your theory that the tool had to be close to him was correct, and so your handler had hidden it not far from where your meeting had occurred. After he died, the glamour placed on it fell apart, and Azriel's shadows easily found it in the exact place Rhysand had told him it would be in.

The tool was nothing more than a simple amulet. It was easy to overlook the small ruby hanging from a delicate golden chain if it weren't for the strange, dark aura that clung to it, even Azriel's shadows seemed to recoil from it. It was hard to believe such a small object could cause so much destruction and hurt so many people.

Using the tool shouldn't prove to be too complicated for Rhysand either since he has seen Norris' memories of using it - you asked him to share these with you, but he refused, not wanting you to see that cruel male ruin your life and the state your body was in when Norris found you lying in a pool of your own blood in the forest, somehow still alive despite the wound and how long it had been, you decided to wait for your memories to come back before asking him again, the old you had to know how to convince him better - and, after dismissing the wards around your memories with its help, the rest should fall under standard daemati capabilities, which he already excelled at. Even keeping the amulet inactive and safe would be easy enough. Amren seemed to already have made preparations to keep it safe in the court, and a wicked glint in her eyes at the prospect of having such a tool in their arsenal - you really were glad they were on your side now.

The only standing problem and the reason the atmosphere in the room was so tense, was the lack of knowledge on the spell itself, and, more importantly, how dispelling it would affect you. The wards were placed in your mind a century ago, and had been active without pause for that long. Even Norris didn't seem to know the spell's full power or what ramifications could linger after it's gone from what Rhysand was able to learn in his mind. It's safe to assume that there's a big chance of your mind not being able to assimilate back, or even survive it.

You could almost feel Azriel's anxiety and fear as if they were your own, and, even if he would never ask that of you, you knew he didn't want you to go through with this. It was painfully obvious on his face - the spymaster was a lot easier to read then you would have guessed before meeting him. Azriel would rather have you like this than not at all, and you can't blame him for that as you don't know what it feels like to lose someone you love, let alone being on the verge of it happening for the second time, but that's precisely why you need to do this.

From what he has told you, you lived a full life before Norris had found you, and it doesn't feel right trying to fit back into place when you can't recall any of it, when you don't feel the same as you once did, when you don't know if you're still the same person. It would be impossible to even attempt to live a normal life with the constant reminder that a full century of your life, almost everything that you knew about yourself, had been a lie.

His hazel eyes meet yours as you shift on the mattress, impatiently waiting for Rhysand to finish his preparations. In truth, you don't think he has looked away from you for a second ever since you walked into this room, walked back into his life even.

You give him a small smile, hopefully quelling some of his nerves. He tries to return it, but you don't need your memories or the decades of knowing him to see right through it. It didn't reach his eyes, the concern so visible there it made a lump form in your throat, and his shadows were clinging to him almost desperately, trying to soothe their singer as best as they could, to no avail. You wished you knew how to comfort him, and how to let him comfort you properly in turn - yet another reason to go through with this.

“Are you ready?” Rhysand's voice makes you jump slightly and break eye contact with your husband, not even realizing you'd gotten lost in the warm hazel of his eyes once again.

“Yes,” you nod, straightening your back and placing your palms firmly on the mattress, risking one last look at Azriel before focusing on the High Lord.

“We can start then.”

You'd be lying if you said you weren't a bit nervous, scared even - your life was on the line after all, but this was your only chance of getting rid of that aching empty well inside of you, and if Azriel was convinced Rhysand was capable of doing so, then you believed him.

The High Lord was also worried though, if it wasn't obvious by the way his mate kept touching his arm and squeezing his hand, the lack of his usual obnoxious confidence would have given it away. If he failed he would not only lose his friend again, but also break his brother's heart beyond repair. You even think he'd end up blaming himself, though it didn't seem to fit in with the image you initially had of him. It's not an exaggeration to say your life is in his hands.

Feyre helps him wrap the amulet around his wrist as if it were a bracelet, squeezing his hand one more time before joining Azriel a few steps away, a conflicted look falling over her face as she watches her friend, not knowing how to comfort him. Even Amren, who stood by the door with crossed arms, looked concerned. If you weren't already more than curious enough to risk your life to regain your memories, the fact that such a creature would look worried about you would definitely make you want to remember everything just to find out exactly how that came to happen.

Rhysand walks to you then, stopping right in front of your legs dangling off the bed, close enough that your feet almost touch his shins, and lets out a soft but weary breath, looking into your eyes as if searching for any sign of doubt. When he seems to be content with what he finds in them, he reaches over and holds your head between his hands softly.

“It might help me keep grounded in your mind. Every little trick is worth a try,” he explains when he sees your confused expression, the smile he throws at you not quite reaching his purple eyes either, before closing his eyes, his magic coming to life around you.

In the next moment, you feel black talons scraping at your mental walls, prompting you to close your eyes as well and fight against every one of your instincts to allow the High Lord passage into your mind. You try to keep your thoughts as blank as possible so Rhysand can find what he's looking for more easily, like he said, every trick is worth a try.

You don't exactly know what you were expecting, but definitely not for it to happen so fast. Just as you felt a knock at what you now could distinguish as the wards keeping your memories from surfacing, they came tumbling down, an acute pain at the base of your skull making you fist the sheets under your hands, biting your lip to stop yourself from making any noise or moving too much. You didn't want to break Rhysand's concentration, or worry Azriel and the others more than necessary, you could handle it.

The pain goes as suddenly as it started, and you could feel Rhysand's presence everywhere as he searched through your mind. It was a foreign feeling, to know someone could read into your every thought. Even if he dove into a different corner of your mind, one you hadn’t agreed to, there was no way for you to stop him now, no way for you to stop him from seeing all the awful things you've done at the guild's orders, no way to stop him from showing them to Azriel if he so wished. In the midst of your spiraling thoughts, a soft caress reaches you through your mind, a reassurance - you almost forgot he could hear your fears as well.

A few moments later, you feel him come to a sudden stop, the lull barely giving you a chance to breathe before memories start rushing into your brain at an alarming speed, so much so that your head physically hurts, a lot worse than before. It's like you can feel the memories forming into your brain and pushing away the ones constructed by the spell. Some of them you were vaguely aware of as they seemed to haunt you when you slept, like dreams overwriting reality but, with every second that passes and every moment shown to you, you realize they had never been dreams to begin with.

Your mind struggles to hold onto everything, your past memories eating away at what you had believed was your life mere minutes ago. You faintly feel Rhysand's, now achingly familiar, presence leave your mind, his hands lingering a second longer, thumb caressing your cheek comfortingly before following, letting you have some privacy to assimilate the onslaught of information on your own, and then the world goes dark, senses completely overwhelmed, barely registering the feeling of your body falling back into the mattress and scarred hands holding onto you, as your mind struggles to catch up to everything.

Your feelings seem to reach you before the memories even have a chance to sink into your mind, or for you to go through them and remember everything properly. The strongest ones are easily your love for Azriel, flowing over you in suffocating waves, and the subsequent anger at yourself that follows, for abandoning him and then hurting him so much. It's like some little voice inside you that had been screaming at you, and trying to claw its way out from under your skin, trying to stop you from hurting him, was finally able to be heard.

As you rake through the memories, remembering all the happy moments you and Azriel have spent together, - every little date, every kiss, every night and morning spent together, - and even the saddest ones, - the fights spent yelling at each other in the rain and the make up sex right up against your front door - the guilt only gets heavier in your chest, tying itself around your heart and almost making you unable to breathe.

You stabbed your husband, the love of your life, the male you had vowed to protect and love to the end of your days. Even if you had been controlled by whatever dark magic was in your brain, you can still feel the weight of Truth Teller in your hand, could feel the faint resistance of his skin against the decisive force of your movement, could feel his blood on your hands, could feel so much blood on your hands. Gods, what have you become?

It almost feels like there's two people inside you for a few moments, trying to make sense of each other as the world collapses and re-forms itself around them. As one part of you lives through memories in the night court, the other balks at all you've done at the guild, mourns an innocence you will never be able to get back. You don't know where you begin and the assassin ends, where Azriel's wife even fits in the equation.

Trying to stay on track, and desperately hold onto something in the incessant waves of memories, real and fake, and the feelings attached to them, you try to calm yourself enough to try to remember what happened the night you died. You knew your throat had been cut with a faebane laced weapon, the scar would always be etched into your skin, but you never knew how it happened. For some reason, you never even thought of asking anyone in the guild about it, like you didn't consider it pertinent information - no doubt, a consequence of the spell Norris used on you. If you started asking questions you might have found out something you weren't supposed to.

That particular night is still somewhat hazy in your mind, likely a consequence of the trauma you experienced. There are broken memories of you talking about the mission with Azriel and the rest of the Inner Circle. You recall not feeling the least bit nervous about it as they were simple bandits that somehow had gotten lucky and managed to evade Azriel's shadows for a little while before getting caught. You remember getting a few leads on them, and splitting up to try and find something. The feeling of Azriel's lips on yours as he quickly kissed you goodbye before disappearing into his shadows is still vivid in your mind.

After that things start getting muddled. You found the bandits at some point, and, even if there were more of them than what you expected, they didn't seem particularly strong so you were holding up your own in the fight that broke out as soon as they saw you. The next thing you knew though, someone had struck you from behind, hitting the back of your head hard enough that it brought you to your knees, the same person grabbing your hair and slicing your throat the next moment, not giving you a chance to avoid it. There's a break in your memories then.

All you can remember at first is your body feeling heavy, not being able to get your limbs to obey your commands as you struggled to flip yourself over so you weren't laying face down on the mud, the cold rain falling on your skin uninterrupted. Trying to take a breath into your lungs only to find it almost impossible and extremely painful. You remember the coppery taste in your mouth distinctly, not being able to swallow or make any sound through your destroyed throat. The thought that the knife had to have been laced with something was swimming around your mind, a simple cut like that wouldn't have been hard for your fae healing to handle.

You were vaguely aware of the voices around you but couldn't make any sense of what they were saying, your heartbeat was too loud in your ears and panic was starting to set in. The only thing you were sure of at that moment was that you were going to die on that muddy floor at the hands of petty thieves, this possibility not allowing you to even try to make out what they were saying, not caring about them anymore.

Azriel always told you that you needed to work on your openings so things like this didn't happen, so you didn't get caught off guard. He was right, he usually was, not that you would have ever admitted it to his face. The thought of your husband brings tears to your unfocused eyes. You wished you could have had more time with him. He has brought you an amount of love and happiness you didn't even think possible, and all you'll give him in return is pain. You promised him you would stay by his side to the end of your days, assured him you would never leave him multiple times when his nightmares became too much to bear and old insecurities made themselves known.

You made one last prayer to the Mother. Begging for your life wasn't worth it anymore, but you still asked that Azriel could survive this, that he would forget about you and move on. You had always wanted to give him the best, had vowed to make him as happy as possible but were failing miserably like this. The news of your death would break him, you didn't even want to imagine how he would feel when he found out. Fuck, you hoped he wouldn't be the one to find your body at least.

What a cruel fate. Making him go through so much hardship and pain in his life and still take one of the few blessings he had found for himself. You've only been married for a little over a decade, such an insignificant amount of time compared to the years he had behind him, and hopefully still ahead of him. You'd never forgive the Mother for making him suffer so much.

As your thoughts quiet, you notice the lack of voices around you. Apparently the killers had just left you there, bleeding out on the cold ground, not even bothering to finish the job properly. They didn't have to, you didn't need to be a healer to know your injuries would kill you in not even another minute. Your senses were getting duller with every painful beat of your heart, you couldn't even hear the sounds of the birds coming from the forest behind you anymore, couldn't focus on your thoughts, could barely see the light of the moon and the stars shining in the dark sky. It feels fitting for you to die at night, it was as close to Azriel as you could get now, watching the same moon shining under him, the same one you had fallen in love under.

As you gaze upon the brilliant light of the moon, wishing you would have had the chance to say goodbye, a tightness settles in your chest, somehow making it pump faster, lessening the ache ever so slightly. The feeling is unlike any other, you mistakenly think it to be your body dying off before a breath is once again allowed into your lungs, easier than before. You blink a few times then, trying to search your surroundings for anyone with the limited control you had over your body, only to come up short. If anyone was healing you, there would be no reason for them to keep hiding. You've also had to be healed after an injury plenty of times, enough to know what it feels like and how effective it can be. This felt different somehow, and it didn't seem to be fully healing you as you could still feel your wound bleeding, your throat still as painful as it had been.

Azriel's familiar scent reaches you and mixes with your own. Your chest grows tight once more, body temperature somehow rising despite the cold rain and lack of blood, before an overwhelming feeling washes over you, traveling to every inch of your being as things suddenly click into place.

This was a mating bond.

Your sobs return at the realization, even more inconsolable than before, fingers digging into the bloody mud under you at the unfairness of it all. You could feel Azriel as if he was under your skin for a moment, smell him like he was standing over you, when in reality he was nowhere to be found, when you wouldn't be able to see him ever again.

Mating bonds are extremely rare and precious, most fae yearn for one chance of a love as powerful as a bond like this can bring. So why would the Mother waste it on you? Why not bind Azriel to someone who can stand by his side? Why not show it to you sooner, so you could have at least enjoyed it for a while? You've never heard of a bond forming as one person is about to die, when the other isn't even close - usually all it takes is a simple glance, the right exchange or words, rarely happening years after knowing someone.

What was the purpose of this? Why must life be so cruel? You almost want to hope it was a mistake, but the visceral reaction your body has at the thought, even in this state, doesn't allow you to. Azriel was yours, even if only for this laughable amount of time. You had a mate, one you would be able to tell your parents about when death came for you and took you to them.

Those were the thoughts swirling around your mind as you let out what would have been your last breath. Crying every tear left in your body, looking up at the moon and praying for the Mother to take the bond away, or not allow Azriel to feel it because, as much as it hurt you, you knew it would kill him to not only lose you but also lose a mate.

You had found it strange when Rhysand had told you Norris had found you alone in the forest, your body already cold, only a drop of blood still allowing you to cling onto life, but this explains it. The bond had somehow kept you alive long enough for Norris to find you, and take you to a healer at the guild like Rhysand saw. You had been long unconscious when he did, and so you didn't have any memory of any of it. You were also pretty sure the thieves might have been working for him, which explains how they had evaded Azriel's shadows for so long.

The answers regarding your death, the ones you had been aching to learn, now paled in comparison to what you had just unknowingly stumbled upon. You had a mate. You almost couldn't believe it, but the bond made itself known now that it was free from the wards' confines, shining bright deep inside you, linking you to someone through a strong but neglected bridge, still holding on after a century, and you know just where that bridge leads, shadows lurking over the other side.

You come to slowly, your mind aware of your consciousness before your body can follow. It's like you've never been this deeply asleep, the feeling of deja vu hitting you immediately. Perhaps that's why it takes you longer to realize you weren't lying down on a bed, not directly at least. There was a body under you, holding you close to him, enough so that you could hear his heartbeat as your head rested on his chest. You know it's Azriel right away, his touch and scent so unmistakable to you now, you don't know how it had been possible to ever forget it.

And the bond. You can feel it now, can feel something connecting the two of you, etched so deep into your soul that it almost feels impossible that you've been blind to it for so many years. Maybe because you've left it abandoned all this time, but you can literally feel it purr in satisfaction now, making it hard to focus on anything else.

You don't know how long you had been out for, the sun had set in the sky and everyone seemed to have left you two alone, the faint, lingering smell of Rhys' expensive cologne mixed with one scent you've only discovered recently, the only thing left behind. Gods, you can't believe both Cassian and Rhys had mates too.

Azriel had moved to lean against the headboard, sitting you across his lap, holding you close to him and resting your head against his chest as he rubbed slow circles up and down your arm soothingly. You didn't have to see him to know he had called his shadows over the both of you, keeping you safe in his arms as he waited for you to wake up, just like he always did.

Taking a deep breath, you open your eyes, not being able to restrain yourself from looking at your mate for another second. He must have been distracted or falling asleep himself because he tenses softly when you stir and rise up from his chest, hand moving up to hold your cheek adoringly the moment your eyes meet his wide, hazel ones.

You can see the questions swirling in his gaze, can almost taste the anxiety, but relief conquers every other emotion. As much as he wanted to know you were back, he was glad you had at least survived. Keeping him in suspense would be cruel of you, especially after making him wait a hundred years, you don't think you could bear another second either.

“Hello, Az,” you whisper softly, emotion tightening your throat. He lets out a sigh of relief, one that came from the depths of his soul and brings tears to his eyes. He leans his forehead against yours, stealing your breath away as a tear rolls down your cheek unattended.

“Welcome back, my love.”

[ll7esxs]

✦ 𝐓𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: They rejected you because they are not into you. ✦ 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬: Logan walker, Hesh walker, Elias walker, Keegan russ, Thomas merrick, Kick. ✦ 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: X G!N! Reader. ✦ 𝐓𝐲𝐩𝐞: Headcanons. ✦ 𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 / 𝐓𝐨𝐧𝐞: Angst ✦ 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Unrequited love, emotional rejection, hurt feelings ✦ 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𖦹 ⟡ summary: You were teammates—side by side through fire and fury—and somewhere between the chaos, you found yourself drawn to them. It was easy to admire them… too easy to adore. So you gathered the courage, heart pounding louder than gunfire, and confessed. A moment suspended in hope. But their answer came swift, clean, and final: "No." And somehow, that hurt more than the bullets ever did.

Logan Walker

He doesn’t enter relationships lightly — if he’s not all in, he won’t pretend.

His mind is always split between the job and survival. He doesn’t allow himself distractions.

There might even be some guilt there — like you deserve more than what he could give.

He respects you—hell, he really does—but no way is he ready to just spill everything or break it all open right now.

So he goes quiet. Not because he’s awkward or caught off guard, but because he respects you too much to rush or blurt something out he can’t take back.

No fidgeting. No stammering. Just stillness.

He takes a breath, thinking through what to say, weighing every word.

And you? You catch that look—the rare, unreadable pause—and can’t help but say with a knowing smile feeling your heart punded you know the answer, “Oh... Logan...”

He exhales softly, finally breaking the silence with a low, honest tone: “I didn’t expect that.”

Another pause hangs between you—heavy, deliberate. Not because he’s unsure, but because every word matters.

His eyes lock with yours, steady and unflinching.

“I respect you. A lot. You’re good—good to work with, good to be around. But I don’t think I’m…I'm in the right place to give you anything back.”

The words hit bluntly, but there’s no cruelty behind them. No dodging. Just raw honesty.

His shoulders tense, not from indifference, but because he cares—and it hurts him to cause that pain.

Even now, after breaking your heart, he won’t let you walk away shattered.

Before you turn, he adds quietly: “You’re stronger than most people I know. Don’t let this change how you see yourself.”

You shrug, trying to mask it with a casual “I’m fine!”

And then, he lets the silence fall—no chasing, no empty promises. That’s just not who he is.

But he makes damn sure you leave knowing this isn’t about you being not enough. It’s about him—not ready, not able, not whole enough to give you what you deserve.

Hesh Walker

Hesh is a man of duty and responsibility, often putting the mission and those depending on him first.

He knows relationships demand time and emotional investment, and he’s wary of letting someone in only to pull away.

He doesn’t want to lead you on or waste your time if he can’t fully commit.

Hesh pauses, his strong gaze locking with yours—eyes heavy with a mix of shock and regret.

He broke the tension with "Jesus christ" A breathing laugh.

Calm and deliberate, he speaks “Look, I’m damn honored you feel that way. Seriously. But I’ve got a lot going on that keeps me tied up—more than most people know.”

He steps a little closer, his voice lowering but steady, unwavering.

“I can’t promise you what you’re asking for, when it comes to this... I gotta be real. I can’t give you what you deserve.”

Then, in a rare moment of warmth—no pity—he places a strong hand on your shoulder, grounding the silence between you.

“You’re solid. Don’t settle for less than what you’re worth. And you damn sure don’t owe me anything.”

His eyes never leave yours — making sure you understand this isn’t about you, not a rejection of who you are.

Hesh wants to keep things clean: professional, respectful — no awkwardness, no bitterness trailing behind.

A small, half-smile quirks at the corner of his mouth — serious, but soft enough to ease the tension, that trademark Hesh way.

His rejection is honest and firm, never cruel or dismissive. Respect matters more to him than romance or fleeting chances.

Elias Walker

Elias prioritizes duty above all else, sometimes to a fault.

He’s well aware of the sacrifices and hardships that come with a life in service — and he doesn’t want to drag someone else into that.

His sense of tradition and responsibility makes him cautious about starting something he can’t fully commit to.

He’s likely to worry about the consequences more than the feelings at the moment.

He stiffens, jaw tightening slightly, eyes narrowing not with anger but with weighty consideration.

“I appreciate your honesty. That takes guts. But I’m a man with responsibilities that don’t leave much room for anything else.”

He steps back, keeping his distance but with no malice.

“I’ve spent my life making sacrifices for the mission and my family. This... this isn’t something I can take lightly or act on.”

Elias’s tone softens just a fraction, showing a flicker of genuine care beneath his stern exterior.

“You deserve someone who can give you their all. I’m not that man right now.”

He looks at you, not to dismiss but to convey respect.

He hope you do not mistake him for underestimating you and that he is just find no place with you to act on these feelings.

He nods once, signaling the end of the conversation.

He walks away with purpose, leaving you with that weighty respect and an unspoken hope that you’ll find someone better suited.

He hopes nothing to you, but to focus on your missions on your surviving.

Keegan P. Russ

This is keegan.

He keeps emotional intimacy extremely guarded.

He views relationships — especially in high-stakes environments — as distractions or vulnerabilities.

Keegan values honesty and clarity, even if the truth stings.

He doesn't believe he can meet expectations emotionally, so he cuts it off before it can start.

Keegan doesn’t flinch from the moment — he never does. But something in his eyes tightens, just barely, like a muscle pulled too long.

“You really picked the worst timing for that, y’know.”

His voice stays low, measured — not because he doesn’t care, but because it’s the only way he can care without breaking his own edges.

Well shit...He did not see that coming.

“I don’t think I can give you what you want.”

His tone is direct, honest. Not cruel — just disconnected from emotion, like he's offering facts in a debrief.

"if you’re looking for something more than what this is… I’m not wired for it."

Despite the bluntness, Keegan makes sure you don’t feel small.

He will just go with a simple thing "It is not about you" when you try to leave.

He nods once then turning around to leave, without any other glance.

Thomas merrick

Erm actually that is not hard for him lol.

There’s no shock in Merrick’s face. He listens the way he always does — completely, without interrupting.

He takes a breath, long and steady. His posture straightens, even more than usual — the kind of stillness that only comes from someone used to delivering hard truths with care.

"You’re brave for sayin’ that."

His voice doesn’t waver — not cold, but controlled. Like every word has weight.

"But that path... it ain’t mine. Not with you."

He’s not someone who beats around the bush — but he never belittles feelings.

"I’m a man that carries too much, and I know what happens when people like me try to make room for more."

"You deserve better than someone who’s only halfway here."

He doesn’t leave it cold — His gaze stays on yours, solid and unwavering. He doesn’t retreat or deflect — he just stands there, willing to let you see him as he is.

"You’re good. And you’ll find someone who sees that and gives you what you deserve. That just... ain’t me."

He gives a nod of finality—subtle but resolute—and leaves you space to step back with dignity.

Merrick treats you no differently afterward. There’s no awkwardness, no condescension. He’s a man of structure and respect.

Your courage didn’t go unnoticed—he holds that in regard. But he keeps a line drawn, and he never lets it blur.

Kick

Kick is painfully aware of how chaotic, dangerous, and unstable their lives are — especially his.

He might not trust himself with something real, especially if he genuinely good with you.

He may flirts by nature, but serious emotional commitment scares him, more than he'd admit.

Damn. You’re really brave, y’know that?

That is what he thought to himself.

Kick will try to talk it out by complimenting you, and he is not lying with every word in his feeling.

“You’re smart. Got your head on straight. Too good for me, honestly.”

There’s no joking here now — he drops the sarcasm when it counts.

He shifts his tone to something softer — not pitying, not dramatic, but real.

Oh yeah he thinks you are good but not for him, and his mind never got the idea of you both pairing.

So he would tell you by how busy he is.

“I’d just mess it up. Or disappear on you halfway through something good. That’s not fair to you.”

Then he chuckles lightly, almost a sad sound.

“I’d rather keep you around than ruin something real by pretending I’ve got my shit together.”

If you press for more or just want to know why, he doesn’t shut down — he’s honest.

“I care. That’s the problem. I care too damn much, and that gets dangerous real fast around people like us...think about it y/n”

He won’t let this ruin what you have, but he won’t pretend it didn’t happen either. That’s his quiet way of saying he respects you too much to string you along.

[froggiewrites]

Hi! I saw that your requests were open and I couldn't wait to jump on the ask train aahhhh >< If it's ok with you, can I request for hurt/comfort with GN!reader x Ace? Prompt is: Ace survived Marineford physically, but mentally and emotionally, he's relapsing due to everything that's happened. Reader tries to comfort him while he has an anxiety attack maybe :((

If this request is too triggering for you, then no worries! Hope you have a good day ^^

~ 🍂 ace's widow ♠️

This was the first request in my inbox, and what a perfect one to start with! Thank you so much for sending it in, I loved writing this. I love writing anything for Ace, and honestly as someone who really struggles with anxiety this was really therapeutic to write.

Do I Deserve It?

Pairing: Ace x Reader

SFW

Summary: Ace has been struggling lately, and you do your best to help. Warnings: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Vague Suicide Ideation, Marineford Spoilers/Mention Word Count: 1.3k

Ace hadn’t been himself today.

You noticed it in the morning, when you woke to an empty, cold bed. Ace typically slept in as late as he could, his snoring being the first sound you hear every morning. After the bloody battle at Marineford, you had been waking up alone more and more. You sometimes find him alone on the deck, staring into the horizon, a distant look in his eyes. When he sees you, he usually comes back to himself, smiling his wonderful, boyish smile, though his eyes remain dim and glassy. He’s somewhere far away, locked inside his own mind, only bringing parts of himself back long enough to kiss you softly, hold your hands, and assure you he’s okay.

This morning he didn’t even notice you were there. You were worried about disturbing him, bringing him back from wherever he had gone too quickly and causing damage you didn’t know how to fix, so you gave him a little time. You found Marco, quietly letting him know that your lover didn’t seem to be in a good mindset, before making Ace a small breakfast and tea.

“I have something for you, my love.” You keep your voice quiet and soft, afraid too loud or sharp a tone will send him running like a frightened animal. His head whips around at the sound of you, his shoulders tensing even more, but he doesn’t leave. That’s something. You set the plate next to him, and gesture for him to take the steaming mug directly. He lifts his hands, ready to receive, but they’re shaking so badly they can’t even wrap around the ceramic properly.

“Ace?”

He’s looking at you, blinking just slightly too rapidly, brow beaded with sweat. He tucks his hands under his thighs, trying to hide what you’d already seen. “Thanks. You can uh–you can set it down there.” His voice is ragged, barely able to get past his quick and shallow breaths.

“My love, are you alright?” You don’t know why you ask the question when you both clearly already know the answer. You set the mug down carefully before gently reaching to untuck his hands from under his legs. You go slowly, giving him ample chance to pull away, but he allows you to take his hands in yours. They’re clammy and unsteady, fingers twitching like he’s readying himself for a fight. “What’s wrong?”

He takes in a shaky breath, trying to steady himself, then another, then another after that. Before you realize it, he’s hyperventilating, and he throws himself into you, burying his face into your neck. You press one of your hands to his chest in surprise, and you can feel his heartbeat racing beneath your fingertips. His arms tighten around you, his nose burying itself deep in your neck, and you feel a wetness against your skin.

Instead of trying to speak, you start gently running your fingers through his hair, smoothing any tangles you find. He holds you tightly and shakes for several minutes, gasping for air. You pretend you don’t hear the choked breathing against you, and pretend you don’t hear how much he struggles to speak when he finally begins to mumble against your neck. “I’m horrible.”

“What?”

“I’m horrible. Awful. I–I should have–”

“Portgas D Ace, don’t you dare say what I think you’re about to say.” You want to pull him out of your neck and force him to look you in the eyes, make him know that what he was about to wish for was the only horrible thing here, but you worry if you pull him back you’ll untether him further and he’ll completely lose himself to the fears that have clearly overtaken him. You settle for kissing the side of his head the best you can without disturbing him, and taking on a gentler but still firm tone of voice. “I’m so glad you’re still here. I can’t imagine a world without you.”

“I am too. That’s the–” He lets out an angry huff at how he’s struggling to articulate, and you see small flames lick up his back. You use one hand to slide gently down his spine, extinguishing them. “So many people died. So many. And Pops almost–” His voice cracks, and he only just barely manages to hold back the new tears forming on his lashes. “For me. Some worthless, useless kid with tainted blood. And I–I’m happy about it. How sick is that? I’m happy I’m alive, even after all of that. Happy they wanted to do that for me. I’m the worst man alive. I deserved it.”

“Ace–” You don’t quite know where to start, so you pick a thread you know you can follow. “First off, it’s only right for a father to defend his son. Pops doesn’t regret a thing, and he wouldn’t even if things had gone worse. He’d do it for you. You’re his son.” 

His breath hitches again, and he lets out another quiet mumble. “I was so happy to see him. I kept telling myself it was okay, that it was better this way, but I was so happy to see him and know that I might live. Even if I didn’t deserve it. Even if things were worse with me here. I wanted to be allowed to live.”

“You are allowed to live. And every person there wanted you to. Still wants you to. You have no idea the good you’ve done, how many people you’ve helped. You’re a shining light, Ace, and none of us want you to be snuffed out.” Your hands rub soothing circles into his back, tracing lightly over the dimple at the bottom of his spine. His breathing slows slightly as his breaths get a little steadier. He’s still shaking in your arms, but less than earlier.

“I want to live. I want to keep going. But some part of me is still there, with the blade against my neck, and he’s begging for it to be over. It’s hard to ignore him.”

“I know it can be hard to hear anything over the voice in your head. But I promise you you have people here for you. I’m right here whenever you need me. Marco’s here. Pops is here. We all will help you in whatever way we can, whenever you need us. We love you, Ace, and we’re so happy you’re still with us. I would do all of it again if it meant keeping you safe, and I promise you everyone else feels the same. Even those of us who didn’t make it. We love you. We need you. We want you to live.”

You feel hot, wet tears against your neck again as he quietly cries into you. “I want to, too. I really want to.”

“So you will.”

“I will.”

You hold him for as long as he needs, long after his breakfast has gone cold and the sun has risen. The tension leaves him slowly but surely, and after a while you hear a soft snoring. You adjust him to a more comfortable position, leaning your back against the railing of the ship. You let him sleep as long as he needs, until the sun is high in the sky. Many members of the crew pass you, give soft looks of concern, but no one disturbs him.

Your talk doesn’t solve his problems, of course. They’re much bigger than a single conversation can solve. But instead of waking up to an empty bed, you start waking up to warm arms around you and a head buried between your shoulder blades or in your chest, listening to your heartbeat. You still find him on the deck, staring into the horizon, but instead of giving you a fragile smile when you find him he simply takes you into his arms, finding comfort in your presence. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and Ace certainly won’t be rebuilt in one. But there is always a first day, then the one after that, and another, until eventually you can’t remember what it felt like before the first bricks were laid. He can be happy, in time. You can’t wait to see it.

[phoenixeclipse-lmkau]

Good morning! (I do not know when you will see this message) I've had a question in my head for a long time. I don't know if you'll understand me or not, but I'll try to explain my thoughts. As you said, the reader can sleep with Military Leaders at will. But how did they get her pregnant? And why, even after pregnancy, does she go into her own world and does not want to see the Military Leaders? I know she didn't want to be with them.. And yet, she didn't want to come back to this world?

OKAY! This is a lovely ask which has a very simple answer! But am I going to tell you that answer? NO! Well not in a simple way, here you go a complete unofficial CHAPTER! You will find your answer somewhere within~

Three weeks. You had been back in your world, your home for three weeks. Three weeks since you had left the demons who were your husbands and three weeks since you said goodbye to the companions you had made in those fourteen long years. You didn’t look liked you aged a day, not that you had stopped aging at all. You had to return the amulet that Guanyin had gifted you for the journey.

Even with it’s return, she did say that it may be several years before you begin to age again. All for a journey that you never wanted to go one, was it even worth it? You had finished the task, everyone survived… your husbands… even though they survived you still remember the pure rage across their faces when you left.

No! Focus on now, focus on your family, your home. You had been home for three weeks and there were several more months and years to look forward to, in your home. It was calm and nice, your family had welcomed you back with open arms and tears of joy. You had really missed them. You had missed very little having only been gone for about a month for them… well it wasn’t a little. There was quite a bit that happened for them. Just not as much as you had gone through.

You looked out the window to see rain gently falling against the glass windows of the new apartment your brother had gotten. He had come back home in the time you were gone and started helping your mother and your younger siblings, they were taken better care of, there really wasn’t anything for you to worry about. You wouldn’t admit to his face that he took better care of your family than you did. It left a bittersweet taste in your mouth.

The smell of your mother’s cooking filled the air, chicken tacos, oh fuck you wanted to vomit! The chair scraped against the floor as you ran straight into the bathroom and you threw up everything that was in your gut.

Coughing and dry heaving for a moment you were finally able to lift your head up. A muffled groan escaped your lips as you tasted vomit still on your tongue. As soon as you were sure that you wouldn’t throw up again you stood up and washed your mouth out in the sink. This was the third time in the past week that the smell of food had made you throw up.

“What is going on?” You asked yourself.

Ever since you had returned you had gotten strange cravings, sudden heart burn, felt sick and felt just plain heavier than normal. The thought of pregnancy had plagued your mind more than once, but each time you pushed it away. You couldn’t be pregnant, it wasn’t possible. You told yourself this more than once.

There were many times that you looked at your figure in the mirror and it looked the same. That gave you hope, hope that you weren’t pregnant. While it was true that you would love children of your own, running around carefree and happy. You didn’t know how you’d react especially with how you left the two who would most definitely be the father or fathers.

You pushed the thought aside as you looked down at your stomach, it didn’t look much different. It was slightly bigger, but that could be because your mother was feeding you more than you were able to eat on the journey. You could only hope, you thought as you stood back up.

 “Is everything okay hun?” You heard your mother call out and you put on a cheerful tone, as best as you could that is.

“I’m just fine!” You called back, quickly flushing the toilet and standing back up unconsciously rubbing your stomach.

>>> 

Days passed like this, you would smell something strange and you’d push the thought aside. You would throw up most mornings after waking up. You would feel your heart burn at times too. That wasn’t even scratching the weird cravings for food you were getting. Mostly exotic fruit, the fruit that your husbands used to give you, damn you could go for some of that fresh pricked, vibrant colored fruit.

Still you pushed those thoughts aside. You didn’t want it to be true, if it was you weren’t sure what you would do. It’s not like you could go to a hospital or something. You weren’t going to think about it, you weren’t going to think about it! Your eyes drifted to the clock next to your bed. It was almost three in the morning and you hadn’t gotten a single moment of sleep.

*Knock knock*

Your eyes snapped open and you damn near shot out of bed. Your head whipped to the side and you almost froze, standing outside the window on a chaos magic cloud was none other than Isa-Bella. Her eyes calm and sweet as she pressed her hand to the window. You squeaked as she walked through it, her feet gently hitting the floor without a sound.

“Hello Reader, it’s been a while,” She said calmly, sweetly, it was strange to hear her sound so sweet when she sounded so harsh the last time you met her.

She wore her dark brown hair up in a tight bun, with three hair pins keeping it in place. Her dark orange eyes looked you up and down, but rather than the annoyed expression she wore the first time you all met, they were soft. A dark orange hanfu covered the majority of her figure, and over top of that was a simple black cloak. What caught your eyes though was the black bag slung over her shoulder.

“What are you doing here?” You asked with narrowed eyes, and a nervous chuckle.

Her gaze turned down to your stomach and you felt your chest tighten. “We need to talk.” Her words were calm and cold as they usually were.

…

“I’m pregnant?” Your world felt like it was upside down, you felt nauseous, you felt terrified. That was impossible! There was no way that- so many things clicked into place when she told you though.

You had been intimate with your now ex husbands but you didn’t think… you didn’t think anything would come from it. Your head whirled as you tried to think of something to say, anything. Tears welled in your eyes as you wrapped your arms around your stomach terrified for what the future held for you… and your children.

“So… what do I do?” You were barely able to speak as the woman before you let out a sigh.

“That is a choice you have to make. You can have the child who will likely be a monkey demon or demoness. If you have them here in this world I can give them a glamour but you won’t be able to raise them in this world forever… young demons have a hard time controlling their powers and it could result in serious injury if you try to raise them completely alone once their powers start to surface,” She speaks calmly, not a single word out of place as she explains what you can do.

“Or you can return to our world right now and raise them from birth there, however… someone would likely be able to sense the birth of the child… including their fathers.”

The words rang in your head, “Wait? Fathers? Don’t you mean father?” Surely only one of them would be the father.

Isa-Bella glanced at your stomach before looking back up at your face with a slight frown. “It appears that… both of their magic has combined likely due to the fact they were mates long before meeting you. So the cub or child is likely to inherit traits from both of them, we won’t know until the birth weather or not they are truly from both though.”

You nodded, hugging your stomach tighter, the stomach that carried life within it, that carried your child in it. Gently rubbing your stomach, you felt a strange sense of protectiveness and… joy? Were you actually happy about this? You were going to be a mother. And you would be damned if you let anyone hurt your child before they even had a chance at life.

“I’ll stay here until they gain their powers, that way the celestial realm will be less likely to find out… right?” You questioned worriedly.

Isa-Bella nodded with a warm smile, “That would probably be for the best my dear.”