#... that's how i understand it all at least
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THE NEW CHAPTER OF MISTAKES ON MISTAKES UNTIL IS OUT AND YOU ALL KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS~~~~~~
Spoilers for ch 74 below >:)




Head in hands. And then they all happened to be self sacrificial idiots.
Infinitely delighted by the fact that Optimus automatically decided to catch whoever was falling and only look who that was afterwards. 100/10. Peak Optimus writing.
#fic fanart#momu fanart#maccadam#transformers#jazz#prowl#jazzprowl#optimus prime#megatron#momu is so good it made me draw megatron again✊ this is what true power looks like#teeny tiny doodle of Ratchet#I love momu Optimus beyond imaginable#usually I’m much more interested in him while he’s still Orion#because Optimus feels much more restricted in his thoughts and actions you know#in fics. I forgot to say I was talking about OP in fics#but in MOMU? I don’t even know how to describe it?? He is so comforting#he is all responsible and noble but also JUST the right amount of whimsical and chaotic 🤌#also I WAS NOT PREPARED for that level of architectural descriptions#my brain went ‘bruh we don’t fucking know all those words for space station structure components let’s give up how about that’#ahahahahahdjdjjfjf#not a critique by the way absolutely not#I’m gonna reread this fic at least one more time to catch more details and understand more of#uh#*vaguely waves hands*#this. everything.#because I’m 100% sure the whole story is FILLED with more layers I haven’t catch purely because I didn’t know what to look for
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still i think the one of the more fun differences drawn between illario and lucanis that was lost would be illario's ability to endear himself to others but serious lack of empathy, vs. lucanis' (self perceived) inability to be charming but how much he cares. it's interesting that the game has gone with the "lucanis' ability vs illario's lack thereof" because i think illario being the dellamorte 'best in show dog' vs. lucanis' attack dog would have made me so unwell.
lucanis is... awkward. he's not unlikable, because he is usually very polite, but he doesn't speak much and only seems to care about the other dellamortes. he once sent viago de riva a knife with no note (who knows what he could have meant by this). he does what caterina asks of him, and by his own admission, cannot say no to her. he is a dramatic and prolific killer, and that makes how untouchable he is even worse.
and the crows like illario, sure, AND he's a good assassin! he's even a good crow! he's so good that he can make lucanis smile, and so he is the charming, sociable one. he's the one that stays in treviso and can be relied upon to care, illario's even the one people prefer over caterina and lucanis!
but illario is decoration. he's the prize poodle, and even if poodles were bred to be working dogs, nobody will ever pick him to protect the house over the german shepherd that regularly mauls intruders. anyways the analogy is getting away from me. the point i'm trying to make is that i want illario to have a different kind of jealousy/hatred that's not just over 'being bad at killing' but also an arrogant loathing for everyone around him that is getting harder to hide, because they've forgotten he can bite and is just itching to rip someone's jugular out. illario is very good at hiding his family resemblance to caterina, while lucanis suffers under his grandmother's, and his own, reputation.
#not helped that these ideas are probably fostered by caterina. she doesnt WANT lucanis to have FRIENDS she wants him to KILL THINGS lol#and her perceiving illario as someone who wants but wont rise against her would have been interesting#so she allows his charm and friendliness etc. because she wants him to ingratiate the house to other houses#she doesnt want him out the picture. she NEEDS him there to make people like lucanis. illario just isnt content with that#i will shut up about this. i promise.#like i wont. but im trying#lucanis dellamorte#illario dellamorte#and also i want illario to have a little more manipulative asshole going on he's not believable enough in game omg#i think the main issue i have is that lucanis should have . maybe. been a bit less agreeable. SORRY#but it would have been fun to see crow-like defensiveness slowly break away to reveal a caring polite and kind man#or at least a slow understanding of lucanis-language. like he said 'i dont care' but he meant 'i dont mind'#raised by a grieving and also repressed old italian woman will do this to you#thoo. i was pleasantly surprised at how sweet he was in the game to start but i think parallel wise this could have been fun is all#veilguard spoilers#dragon age#and also really sorry that this was brought upon by someone calling him a pursedog man in tags#which was very funny for 5 minutes and then i was like actually i can do something with this
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Congratulations My Hero Academia for providing, possibly, the biggest and longest legit straightbaiting yet in shonen history.
Bonus points that their final chapter was released on yaoi day.
#first of all absolutely no hate to izuocha#i actually really like them together romantically or not. i love their dynamic so much#but you must know just how hilarious and absurd it is#that this series started with them crushing on each other#and then ochako's attraction to deku became an important part of her character#BUT they completely turn it around and made it about#deku's meaning as a hero and being saved#and ochakos expression of love and understanding others#like. that is legit very compelling and a beautiful relationship#but they did not become A Couple. at least- nothing confirms nor denies it#just like how a queerbait relationship would be#absolutely hilarious. i honestly love how it ended like this#doesnt mean i love the ending tho. oh boy its weird and legit bad in many areas#But this? My god I am so fucking sold.#God bless izuocha bakudeku and togachako i love you all#evelynpr bnha#bnha#mha#my hero academia#mha 430#mha spoilers#bnha spoilers#bakudeku#bkdk#tgck#togachako#i dont think I'll tag izuocha cus...im scared#i really dont hate it guys I promise I dont#izuku midoriya#ochako uraraka
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one thing i've noticed is that whenever people claim sabrina is doing the 'sexy baby' thing and you ask them for specifics, they're nearly always like "well... LOOK AT HER!" but can't point to any specific outfit she wears that actually fits into that aesthetic. which makes sense, because she is a grown woman wearing lingerie and high heels and minidresses. if she were wearing, like, schoolgirl uniforms or pigtails, i could see where people are coming from, but she's not; she's an adult and she dresses like it.
i can't decide if people feel that way because she's short, or because a lot of us first became aware of her when she was a child star, since a lot of people i see making that claim seem to be older than her. like i get that it might feel weird to see the cute kid you saw on disney channel now making blowjob jokes and posing naked for rolling stone. but she's not that kid anymore; she's a grown woman. i think it's completely understandable to have trouble disassociating her from her childhood self since that is how she first rose to fame, but that doesn't mean she's doing the 'sexy baby' thing. she's just a child star who grew up. we saw the same thing with britney, miley, demi, and even dove and vanessa to some extent.
#sabrina carpenter#like i'm only a year older than her so while it was jarring to see maya hart all grown up i did get used to it#but if you're like 5 years older i can understand how this feels like seeing your baby sister doing shots#but child stars need to be allowed to GROW UP#and honestly? a lot of female child stars (esp disney girls) tend to go super sexy at least at first#i think it's at least partially a reaction to having to be squeaky clean for so many years#like remember miley's party girl era?#people lost their minds over that too
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I cannot wait for this Stan to reconnect with his Ford.


I still haven't figured out HOW exactly they'll meet yet, but I do think that Ford would ATTACH himself to Stanley and talk his ears off forever when they eventually get comfortable :] and Stanley would listen because HOLY SHIT, THAT'S HIS BRO HE HASN'T SEEN FOR 40-ISH YEARS, HE MISSED HIS VOICE. Nonstop certified Yapper & Listener relationship <3
Stanley looks dead faced because of his ingrained poker face, but he's thouroughly enjoying it, even if sometimes he has no idea what the fuck Ford is saying. He never interrupts him though, since he knows people usually ignore or interrupt him mid-talk already. So sometimes Stan gets stuck in awkward situations where he has to leave or do stuff, but also doesn't have it in his heart to stop Ford and extract himself out of a (one-sided) conversation.
#Stanley: that motherfucker just ignored you completely- would you like me to kill him.#Stanford: Who? What are you talking about? Anyways. Have you ever seen gnomes before? Because just yesterday I-#I imagine conversations with Stanford to be very stitled and all over the place.#Since his thoughts are quite literally scattered- he can never really process them fast enough to actually verbalize them.#Or even understand them.#So he often only catch the tail ends of a thought- or cutoff half formed thoughts- or only the beginning half of an idea- memory- or opinio#And when he talks- you can really tell with the amount of tangents he goes off into and how everything he says#are completely disconnected and unrelated from one another.#I think the reason he talks so much is because it's his way of desperately trying to get himself understood by someone- including himself.#He's hoping that maybe- by verbalizing EVERYTHING in his mind all at once into some incomprehensible word vomit- that someday-#those senseless- useless words will one day magically order themselves into the right sentence for him to be finally be able to say what#he actually MEANS.#But because he's ''that crazy Town Kook Ford'' he just never really gets the chance to talk to anyone.#People in town baby him- treat him like a child.#And I mean- it must really hurt. For someone of his former intellect to have lost all ability to express himself eloquently#Not because he's any less smart- but because he just can't talk anymore. At least- not in any way that matters#I think Stanley understands him though. I think Stanley would understand his struggle to not be labeled as just stupid by others#Anyways- that was my ramble <3#my post#asks#sput chatters#stanford pines#ford pines#stanley pines#stan pines#gravity falls#gravity falls au#Town Kook Ford AU#my art
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you, and what little remains of your brother.
#sonic#sonic the hedgehog#metal sonic#miles tails prower#unbreakable bond#'family photo. say cheese!' neither of them have a mouth lol..#tails doll#thinking again abt how metal sonic was reprogrammed to hate tails. and yet he still must feel horrid guilt over his death.#im a 'tails doll has bad future tails inside; hes just not All there like metal is' truther#me (drawing thinsg that most likely arent even canon) I HATE THIS WHY IS THIS SO DEPRESSING#if you couldnt tell... tails is using sonics weird uncoiled arm as a pillow...#it isnt relevant but i think theyre in the westside dump here. back where he found tails in the first place.#i dont think either of them remember that by now. only 'this place is painful. this place is important.'#roboticized sonic theory#the title is supposed to be vague as well. works in either direction#tails doll->my brother my hero. trapped in that horrifying form. unable to be the good person i KNOW he is. is there any part of you left?#metal sonic->my brother my hope. trapped in that useless body. does he even recognize me? how much can you think? see? feel? are you empty?#my nyart#anywya#i have other versions with amy (her silhouette at least LOLSIES) but i didnt like em as much so i just... byebye ✌#serious co.pa opening vibes from this#'sachi is my pride and joy... i dont think she even recognizes me anymore...'#you get it#thats not a question. its a command. you Understand. you Do Understand...
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Hi! I love your Ghost Primes with Optimus AU! It’s so good.
I have a question though, do the Decepticons know that Optimus can see the 13 prime ghosts or do they just get increasingly confused each time they fight?
Thank you for the lovely artwork!!
oh they Know something funky is going on for sure lmao
a little more serious answer: they can tell something is going on with optimus and they desperately want to pretend it's not. they don't want to know how he's aware of things he shouldn't be, how he knows stuff that should have long been forgotten, how he seems to be more familiar with them than he should be. how sometimes he speaks and it's like the dead are talking through him. how sometimes he will answer to empty air and somehow they can just tell what he's responding to. who he is talking to.
they Know. and they really, really want to pretend they don't.
they already carry the guilt of failing them once. the idea of doing it once more is unbearable and they'd rather deceive themselves than face it. they'd rather their friends stay dead and gone than think of them seeing what they've become.
haunted au
#hey i got an ask#Anonymous#transformers one#transformers#optimus prime#soundwave#maccadams#haunted au#i loveeeee the concept of the decepticons being the former high guard you don't understand-#i will insert so much guilt and conflicted feelings into this dynamic as possible i don't care what anyone says about it ajkshdka#but anyway. the autobots at least got a brief explanation for optimus' weird behavior#the decepticons did not and so at first they're constantly confused and mildly creeped out by how weirdly cognizant the new little prime is#they eventually put it together. and then dearly wish they hadn't because the guilt that brings is Too Much#but they cannot turn back anymore. they chose their path and now they have to stick with it.#so they just. don't think about it.#this is obviously sustainable and not at all bound to result in a bunch of repressed feelings that may or may not explode at some point#ALSO THANK YOU I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKE MY AU <3333#i'm having so much fun with it but i'm so happy others enjoy it too!!!#thank you so much for sending me this ask!!!!#tf one#my art
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I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.
I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?
The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.
#anya is not a character i see taking agency or indulging in cathartic behaviors#not knowingly like i see her as a character trapped in her head and maybe in the scenario she's cruel to Curly she is envisioning Jimmy#in his place but its not a story about justice or those deserving of punishment and those not like its the opposite of people projecting#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as#she is subjected to a lot of it but it is also not something she wants to subject another person to like you are doing what Jimmy does and#placing ur rage into another persons and viewing their actions through your eyes like she'd more likely yell at him than do harm or#cause him more pain like at least make it in character#but also she clearly doesn't want to see jimmy or curly in the same light and doesnt because she still repeatedly goes to Curly for comfort#and protection and god there's like concepts that need to be applied to characters individually and then the story as a whole#we can not view the game through only one themed lens less we forget to inspect the compounding factor of Anya is so much more than girl#that needs to be allowed to go off but a woman that simply wants right to be done by her and no more harm like she doesn't want to be aroun#the suffering like idk but some of yall would just benefit from like understanding that people are inherently grey with the capabilities of#black n white thinking or actions#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#i like her the most but then again i am defensive of all women in media and hate when people change the way the character would take agency#for themselves like yes I want her to tweak out but she just wouldn't and I like seeing realistic depictions of a woman suffering the way#she is like shes not the type at the end of the movie to have a one liner but feel a shallow freedom cause she needs to realistically heal#idk but its just like there is an obbsession forming with making her character her pain and not how she handles and navigates the issue
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can u believe that back in the day it really must have been like...
viago: you threw my pet snake out a window in my dream and just so you know I will be holding it against you personally and indefinitely. so first of all, how dare you, secondly --
lucanis Beholding him while he rants: ...I want to kiss him under the pale moonlight
#sometimes good things do come along in life and this was one specifically for me#good I was fucking due for one#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#viago de riva#I've been trying to figure out for myself if illario understood what was going on at that time. he must have right#or is lucanis courtship behaviour simply that inscrutable. did the person who knows him best also not understand what that was about#I feel like he MUST have known. but if so he did not intercede on the whole 'sending the most paranoid man in thedas a knife' plan#was he sitting back and eating popcorn for that whole thing or did he at least try to help out.#was he as lost as anyone else in thedas but teia as to how you'd even go about unbuttoning that guy enough to get anything going#I'm trying to decide whether it's funnier to me if illario knew or if he didn't you know how it is. I am guided by the northern star#of whatever I find the most obscurely amusing at any given moment at all times
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as much as I love batgirl 2024, I have to admit the lack of Barbara Gordon mentions in the whole series so far, especially with the first arc having such a big theme of motherhood/daughterhood and the things that comes with it, makes me soo sad. Barbara was the first person Cass actually considered as a mother! Barbara, although she wasn’t the best at it at first, truly did try to understand and love Cass unconditionally even when she was separated from the Bat mantle! And that panel where Cass overhears Barbara tell Dick that she doesn’t know how to really care for Cass could’ve been the perfect parallel to the whole “is a Mother just being connected by blood? No, Something more is owed/Being a daughter is more than being connected by blood” lines that Cass says in the last (current) issue because Barbara, though she did not physically bring Cass into this world, has sacrificed SO much for her, and in return Cass gave so much back.
#don’t get me wrong I love Cass and Shiva’s dynamic and how it is being explored.#however I DO think you can make an excellent story about the two and their dynamic without Shiva taking a traditional ‘caring’ mother role-#-she realistically did not want or care for at least since after Caroline-and essentially Shiva’s old life and softness-died#although I guess you could say that since Shiva is both reminded of her lost softness and Caroline through Cass-#-Cass symbolizes Shiva’s softness and Caroline reborn especially considering Shiva literally points this out.#I think Shiva and even Cass certainly ‘sacrificed’ for each other and Shiva does care for Cass-#-but it’s not really in motherhood hence Shiva is not ‘soft’ enough for that. And it is not sisterhood-#-because Shiva sees way too much of herself in Cass (i.e “im an open wound” line) so that Shiva cannot fully project Caroline onto Cass.#I would say it is something between those lines. But care and fondness/longing for something lost long ago does not equal motherhood to me.#anyways sorry!! back to babs and cass <3#mainly referring to that issue where Barbara says to Cass “People will forget about me [as batgirl] and that’s ok”-#while essentially handing Cass the title as Batgirl.#Barbara sacrificed the mantle she so loved-the mantle she was angry and devastated and overjoyed and is/was a part of her-#because Barbara believed in Cass and her spirit more than hers. more than anyone’s.#Barbara gave Cass giant leather wings to take to the sky with. SHE LOVES HER SO SO MUCH SHSHDHSKSMSN#Barbara wanted Cass to experience the same joy and freedom she got out of being Batgirl. and in response Cass states-#-“I will never be as good as you” because Barbara IS batgirl still in spirit. And as far as Cass was concerned she will never be as good-#-she will never be as self sacrificing as Barbara no matter how many bullets Cass takes for people.#AND THIS IS SUCH A BIG AREA OF CONFLICT BECAUSE BABS WANTS CASS TO BE HER OWN PERSON SO BAD#SHE WANTS TO LEARN WHAT CASS LOVES AND WHAT CASS SMILES AT SO SHE CAN MAKE CASS SMILE ALL THE TIME#SHE WANTS CASS TO BE MORE THAN BATGIRL BUT ALL CASS WANTS IS TO BE BATGIRL#WHICH IN TURN MAKES CASS WANT TO BE MORE LIKE BARBARA-OR ESSENTIALLY MORE UNLIKE HERSELF-#WHICH MAKES BABS INCREASINGLY MORE DESPERATE TO LEARN ABOUT AND LOVE AND SEPERATE HERSELF FROM CASS-#WHICH THEN MAKES CASS SO DEVASTATED BECAUSE SHE WANTS TO BE LIKE THE PERSON WHO ESSENTIALLY BIRTHED HER. AUAGHSHSJSBDN#yes. you understand.#anyways….idk being connected by mutual sacrifice and mutual love. THAT is the mother and daughter relationship that BG24 was getting at!!!!#this is where I shamelessly endorse CassCainMainly and their meta posts on Babs and Cass btw <333#cassandra cain#barbara gordon#lady shiva
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Agatha's quiet pleading here is killing me. Mouth agape, she shakes her head. Agatha knows why Rio (Death) is here, she feels it, yet, her disbelief is clear, and she still holds hope Rio won't do it.
But then, Rio takes a first step towards her, and then another. The next shot shows Agatha realising that Rio is going to take their/her child. The only person who has ever loved her is going to take away the little being Agatha already loves with her entire heart and soul...
It's no wonder Agatha's defences went up right after. In her eyes, from the moment Death took those steps towards her, Rio chose her job over Agatha and Nicky. From that moment on, something broke between them.
#putting their/her because this specific perspective depends on how much Agatha knows about/understands Nicky's conception#we know that Rio is Nicky's other parent#but Agatha may not be aware that creating a child was something she and Rio could do (and effectively did)#hence why she says minutes later that Nicky was 'made from scratch'#so she may believe that she created him herself#at least she could believe that in that moment#that doesn't erase the fact that Rio IS the baby daddy#but when trying to speak on Agatha's perspective of things...#this uncertainty must be considered#but honestly it's annoying how marvel's hom*ph*bic ass obliges us to live with it#it should've been made clear(er) that Rio is Nicky's parent too#though I would add that maybe in that instant where Agatha realised that Rio came to take their child#she decided Rio was not her child's parent#bc to Agatha a parent would never do that to their child#(and to the person they love)#so she tried to completely block herself from seeing Rio in that perspective#anyway#here ends the little rant#I need to go to sleep#time flies and it's 1am already#fortunately I don't have any in person classes today !#agatha all along#agatha harkness#rio vidal#nicholas scratch#nicky scratch#agathario#agatha x rio
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*hits blunt* Joker has a long-standing one-sided beef with Nightingale in the Blood Blossom au because Nightingale clocked his shit almost immediately and began "sharks are smooth"ing at him. But because Nightingale only comes out in case of emergencies, Joker has to come up with increasingly convoluted schemes to trap the Batman in order to lure him out.
This has the opposite desired effect because this is the equivalent of using increasingly difficult locks to keep the raccoons out of your trash. All you're doing is teaching the raccoons how to pick locks. This also pisses off the other Rogues because Joker keeps making trapping the Batman exponentially harder all because he's beefing with his teenage son.
#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc#dpxdc crossover#blood blossom au#all jokes here all jokes but thats my crack idea for the day LMAO. i think its funniest with BB Danny rather than any other danny#danny has no super special feelings about the Joker. He's a highly dangerous asshole who reeks of middle school redpill edginess.#at least in my understanding of the modern iteration of joker. that's how he comes off as. 'we live in a society' ass mfer. my understandin#of the joker also comes from that one Terry Mcginnis scene in the batman future movie where he caused Joker to have a mental breakdown all#because he laughed at him and called him unfunny. like thats my understanding of the joker and im extrapolating from there.#danny's trick is that he doesnt act sardonic sarcastic or mockingly at Joker at any point in time if he interacts with him. bc if he does#he loses. bc then the joker knows that he IS getting under his skin and then everything else is moot. and it drives Joker INSANE#Joker has an obsession with Batman? NO! Obsession with Nightingale for you! and Bats is NOT happy about it#Danny Casts: that paranoid feeling you get walking past a group of teenagers and hearing them randomly start giggling as you pass by.#its VERY effective.#Danny's not as unaffected as he acts but that doesnt matter to him in the grand scheme of things. so long as joker THINKS he doesnt care#he'll keep doing what he's doing. In reality Joker annoys & irritates the hell out of him. His ideology pisses him off so he gets revenge#by ruthlessly ruining the guy's day whenever he can. 'tell me about why you go by the joker' and then start giggling while he's talking#danny's had YEARS to refine his ability to get under an egomaniac's skin. he takes the joker seriously just not to his face
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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#the fact that people think scum villain#-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me#especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater#heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series#he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters#(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters#like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx#I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes#side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me#i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation#but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years#like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain#the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too#+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu#as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people#another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does#also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be#he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students#and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing#+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this#but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy
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genuinely one of the most life-ruining things i've seen today. what the fuck what the fuck what the fuyck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what t the fuck what in the fucking fucking fuck seriously what the fuck im about to start screaming what the fuck what the fuck dnt you know how abnormal i am about them what the motherfucking fuck aHELP ME
#i need to be medically sedated.#all i wanted out of this season was an acknowledgement about those two and how they're dealing without their dad#and i wanted at least one conversation#and i got both#PLUS THIS#what fo you fucking MEAN we finally get a childhood snapshot of rafe and sarah im about to be so violently ill do you understand how#important this is to me#we are on the raod to reconciliation babey#thank you jesus and also god#sarah cameron#rafe cameron#outer banks season 4#obx s4 spoilers#outer banks#mine
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I think it would really benefit people to internalize that mental illnesses are often chronic and not acute. Some of us will never be able to jump the hurdle of managing illness, much less sustaining a sense of normalcy. Many of us will never "recover," will never manage symptoms, will never even come close to appearing normal - and this is for any condition, even the ones labeled as "simple" disorders or "easy-to-manage" disorders.
It isn't a failure if you cannot manage your symptoms. It isn't a moral failure, and you aren't an awful person. You are human. There's only so much you can do before recognizing that you cannot lift the world. Give yourself the space to be ill because, functionally, you are.
#mental health#mental health advocacy#like... anxiety and depression are often concieved of as simple and easy to manage...#...but that isn't the case for so many of us. anxiety and depression just have a lot more research invested into them...#...and while i wish this were the case for literally every other condition it does alter people's perception of you to some extent...#...so while this is NOT solely about anxiety or depression it includes us...#...my anxiety and depression and PTSD have *destroyed* my life. this is chronic and will probably be life-long...#...and that isn't my fault. i've done the fucking work but guess what? that doesn't account for the fact that I Am Just ILL#the least we can do for each other is to be compassionate#be compassionate to those who cannot heal. be compassionate to the people who can't manage their lives. this world is scary enough#recognize that management of symptoms is something not all of us can do - even IF their condition is labeled as 'easy to manage'#i allowed myself to feel angry that i can't heal 'normally' and that was unfair as fuck toward myself#and i NEED people to internalize this so that MAYBE this could help somebody else who is where i was#i NEED them to understand that it's okay that they are where they are - sometimes shit just doesn't turn out how you expect or want#don't beat yourself over you being a person. you are struggling enough. you deserve to rest. just rest please#and just... give yourself space
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honestly i just think I will fundamentally never understand the very common (and sometimes posited as universal which i don’t love) sentiment among aromantic people/communities that like. oh one part of aromanticism is Not Understanding Or Caring About Or Getting The Point Of the line between friendship and romance, the distinction of different types of relationship. because for me as an aromantic person that line and distinction is actually Extremely important and clear and it feels… weird and bad to consistently see it posited as this like. Prominent Aro Thing to not understand/care about that.
ACTIONS will never inherently be allotted to one type of relationship or another, and the only feeling that is inherently romantic is romantic attraction/love, but the like. labeling itself of relationships and feelings and actions based on the person or people involved… idk. THAT is very important to me. it is Very Important to me that it’s extremely clear that none of my relationships or actions or feelings are or ever will be romantic and it’s important to me that those labels are seen and respected. it’s important to me in my personal life, and it’s reflectively important to me in the stories i tell and the ones i interact with.
idk. people are obviously welcome to the sentiment and i dont begrudge them having it and maybe im misunderstanding what this means when people say it. but it does make me feel a little anxious and once again the odd guy out in my own community to constantly be seeing this posited as like. An Inherently Aromantic Quality to not understand the difference between types of relationship or the point in differentiating. it will always be critically important to me that romance has and will have no place in my life or relationships. once i learned it was possible not to feel romantic feelings or attraction - and i accepted that it was true for me - everything became very clear to me at that point. ‘how do you Know’ i just know. I Just Know. and that matters to me.
#gav gab#aromantic#im just thinking out loud bc i saw someone say this again#was perusing the notes of one of those aros 🤝 poly people posts#(which i usually agree with btw at least more than i dont)#and someone in the notes was like oh it’s cause neither of us understand drawing lines between romance and friendship#and it felt like a kick in the teeth lmao like#no actually my lines between romance and friendship are#extremely fucking strong and Very important to me#and it’s not like people mean this#I Know it’s not what they mean#but it feels to me like people are trying to force romance into my life Somehow#even in the form of like. Fuck Labels Ambiguity#which is not intent it is fair to ascribe to anyone else#especially other aros#but is EMOTIONALLY how it FEELS to me#as an aro who is profoundly romance repulsed and cares very much#for the right to label my relationships and feelings#and depict relationships and feelings in my creative work#as being completely and definitively Not Romantic At All Ever No Wiggle Room No Ambiguity#aro blogging
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