#12 monkeys reference

[dgct2]

You know, "Richard Castle lives in New York with his wife, Senator Beckett, and their three children."

Castle 6x05 Time Will Tell

[koobiie]

[poishy]

i think everyone in the punch out fandom should make a circuit based on the country they were born.

[superhusbands4ever]

I like the theory that Loki is stuck in a time loop in the TVA and if that’s the case, this episode should have been called The Bad Ending because apparently they made all the wrong choices on this little pre-written choose your own adventure and I hope the next episode Loki will start back at the beginning of it when he first comes to the TVA.

Honestly, if the ending twist is that a Kang is still controlling all of this and they just THINK this is free will, I would not be surprised. The whole show is giving 12 Monkeys vibes and it would lead fantastically into Kang Dynasty.

Loki to Sylvie: we have free will now which means we get to choose and we have to choose to fix this!

Kang and OB, Probably: *evil laughter*

[kyri45]

ShadowPeach Bio Parents AU

(2⁰ Masterpost)💛​🧡💜

This masterpost is a continuation of THIS ONE since I ran out of links.

P.8: A Dark, Long Night

Arc 3: 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30 - 31

Arc 4: 32 - 33 - 34 - 35 - 36 - 37 - 38 - 39 - 40 - 41

P.9: A New Dawn (Epilouge)

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13

💜​🧡​💛​FINALE💛​🧡​💜

The first Spinoff, Second Star, has begun!

Extras! (SPOILERS!)

End Credit snippets!

Final party 1

Final party 2

Courtnapping!

Pijama party time!

Father-son bonding experience

Pride parade!

A Spicynoodle Date

Shadowpeach Wedding!

Secret Post-Credit Scene

🎁Official Merch of the Comic!!🎁

📕Comic Summary with extras by @cutvdo📕

🎵Official playlist of the AU🎵

Frequently asked questions:

What inspired you to make the comic? S04 E07. And then S05 finale. I thought that monkey MK looked like the lovechild of shadowpeach

Which app you use? Procreate. Canvas is around 1600x2100px

Why Mac has his Hanfu from left to right? Bc that's how's in the show and it's also a reference to the fact he died

Are MK and Wukong Trans? Yes, they are both FTM transmasc. If you see their chest flat during the comic is because they use glamours/shapeshift almost always

Will we ever see Spicynoodle child? We all agreed that their future kid is Kai. Yes, Kai from Ninjago.

Will you make a sequel? No, I will not make a full sequel. I will make at best a series of spin-offs of the max lenght of 15 chapters each.

Can I make fanart/edits/fanfictions of the comic? Of course! But please tag me and link the masterpost of the comic.

Can I dub the comic? Yes, but before you must DM me and tell me which part you want to dub, where you want to post it, and the username of the people dubbing it.

Can I repost your comic? No

Can I translate your comic? If it hasn't been translated already in your language (check main masterpost to see the translations) then yes. But you must warn me first of where you post it and your username. You must tag me and link the masterpost

Have more questions? Check the past Q&A👇

💛Q&A 12/09🧡Q&A 20/09💜Q&A 28/09💜

💛Q&A 08/10 🧡Q&A 16/10 💜Q&A 23/10💜

💛Q&A 28/10🧡Q&A 07/11💜Q&A 17/11💜

💛Q&A 21/11🧡Q&A 29/11💜Q&A 07/12💜

💛Q&A 23/12🧡Q&A 30/12💜Q&A 06/01💜

💛Q&A 14/01🧡Q&A 25/02💜Q&A 05/03💜

💛Q&A 25/03

[catsoupki]

the way katsuki crushes on you has stayed the same, since he was four he has made sure that everyone, including you, always knew that you were his.

he offers you roughed up flowers from the sandbox, covered in dust and dirt, shoved into your hands are the bundle of wild chrysanthemums and crumbled weeds, and in exchange are the paper rings you made before going to the park, because even when you were four, you already knew bakugou in the way you knew the names of the stuffed animals in your room; a sense of pride nestles inside, somewhere between your little childishly innocent heart and your soft fluttering stomach when you see your katsuki declare proudly with a smug smirk to all his groupies that he's now a married man, and that doesn't change.

in middle school, aged 12 bakugou isn't afraid to lean over your desk and stare you down and demand your time during recess, even though his cheeks used to redden when his female classmates would tease him for being such a romantic for you, he's learnt that it's either he toughens up and take this, or he has to deal with the other boys from his class chatting you up, and seeing their little cheeks tint with pink when they're spared even an ounce of (undeserved) attention from you is much more painful than having his own apples go fuzzy from your gaze.

katsuki changes a lot in U.A. but not in this. maybe the other class 1A kids don't have enough reference to notice, but izuku sure as hell can tell that the slight glisten and shine in his childhood best friend's eyes when he looks at you have only ever grown in brightness as you mature and age. as your body takes shape and your voice deepens, his affection for you simply gets magnified from a sheer adoration for your ability to keep up with him on the monkey bars and to withstand his loudness, either that be from the epicentres of his palms or the ever growing intensity of his voice when deku gets in his way, his respect for you grows and grows and festers and festers the more you win in the sports festival, the more you train, the more muscular you get, and the more internships you are offered.

as his own brashness gets dimmed down while the months go on, deku is no longer the only one who is able to notice the soft spot he has for you. jirou and shoji can only ignore the way bakugou whispers 'that's my girl' to you during class drills so many times, ochako and mina can only turn a blind eye to the way bakugou always cooks for you during the late nights where you collapse from exhaustion before eating so many times, by the end of the second year, even shouto knew to always find bakugou when you got hurt during missions and to just leave you two to your own devices for the rest of the evening.

the smirks might have grown less and less smug throughout the years and maybe more genuine, but the childlike wonder when katsuki looks at you stays always the same, it stays constant from when you were four all the way to when you're walking down the altar, it stays the same, from stepped-on flowers to bouquets of roses, from 'that's my girl' to 'that's my wife', you've always been his, the switch from craft paper to the 24 carat diamond ring on both your fingers never changed that; his face, to deku, looks identical. whenever dynamight is on a talk show and is asked to watch a clip of you fighting, the soft creases next to his eyes have always been there, bakugou's lips just twitch upwards when it's you.

what can he say? your katsuki has always been a prodigy, he knew since he was a kid, since the second his grabby little hands and tiny rolling eyes were laid on you, he has since decided that you were the only one worthy of his greatness, no matter how shitty his temper was at age 15, he looks at you like how sunflowers look at the sun, and that will never change.

[windixie]

gojo x reader ꒰ university au ꒱ love me not ch . 1 ⟢ incoming mail

pairing ⋆˚꩜｡ university au - academic weapon & hockey player! gojo x reader

summary 𐔌 after applying for a top 10 university and actually getting accepted, you say goodbye to your family and travel across the whole entire continent where you find the most handsome boy you have ever laid eyes on at a school hockey game after getting dragged to attend by your new 'friend' and you soon find your small hello's with the hockey player in the hallways turn into late night walks together, making you realize that you didn't travel across the entire world for education but also for an unexpected love story ready to unravel, but after a certain someone spreads rumors around about you to get in between you and satoru, the boy himself starts questioning his feelings for you and now you are left to pick up both the shattered pieces of your heart and the ripped up pages of your love story, desperate to glue the pieces back together, but will you manage in time?

genre/tags : tooth rotting fluff, smut, angst, university au, sort of a meet cute?, slow burn, jealousy, toxic friends, gojo is a year older than reader, readers father gets sick throughout story. some implied choso x reader

warnings ᵎᵎ there will be so much angst in this I fear

chapter . 1 / ꒰ hopefully 5 ꒱

wc ⟡ 2.6k (short but will get longer chapters.)

a/n I welcome you all to the debut chapter of love me not ! I have been wanting to write this story for a long time now. please ask to be in the taglist if you would like, just make sure to like navigation ꒰ to secure your spot ꒱

Yale University .

Dear y/n, on behalf of the admissions committee, it is our pleasure to welcome you to Yale University's class of 2029.

Your academic excellence and leadership activity has stood out to all of us. We are confident that you will enjoy your time at our campus this August 12, 2025. 

We hope to see you soon, please refer to the bottom of this letter for further information and important steps.

With warm regards,

Yale university.

you stare at the paper in your hands in absolute disbelief, the only thing you could hear was your heart going wild against your chest. hundreds of hours of hard work, intense studying, hundreds of dollars spent on AP exams, and personal essays have all come to this, an acceptance letter to one of the top 10 ivy league universities, one you have been dying to attend after your profound passion for literature.

"I got in!" you yelled out as you ran into your house, jumping up and down like those injured monkeys your mother would warn you you'd end up like if you didn't stop your harsh movements in her lullabies. 

"y/n.. get off the couch!" your father yelled out from his office before he fully took in your words. "wait, where'd you get in?" his hands reached up to his face, sliding off his glasses before he stood up from his creaky seat to walk towards you. your mother did the same, pausing whatever delicious meal she was cooking up in the kitchen to approach the two of you. 

"did I hear that right?"

"i got into yale!" you repeated making your parents freeze, long enough to make you question if they even heard you. a loud gasp left your mothers lips before she smacked a hand to stop her jaw from dropping all the way to the floor. "yale?!" she echoed, ready to pounce on you any moment for a big bear hug you knew it'd take you minutes and an asthma attack to get out of. "you got in!" and here it comes. 

you soon found yourself in between your parents arms as your shaking hand continued to hold the letter. the letter that held your whole future. 

preparing yourself to leave your family for months wasn't going to be difficult, you told yourself. but it's hard to when the next few months you had left with them would be full of endless celebration and a lovely environment you knew you would miss. your younger brother ordered you your favorite cake flavor decorated in yale's colors on your last day before your flight. a few tears fell that night and a few more spilled when you said your goodbyes. 

as you walked away, suitcases in both hands rolling right behind you, your brother couldn't help but ask the weeping adults. "do you think she'll turn back?" but you didn't, you weren't like that, but waving one final time wouldn't hurt. 

a five hour flight full of ear popping, babies crying, the man snoring next to you, and the overall amount spent sitting was your first challenge. but the gigantic campus in front of you was worth it. you were one of the first students to begin to move into the dormitories, deciding it's best if you get a head start. 'room 1 floor 2' is a promising combo, perhaps hinting at the perfect four years that are waiting for you. 

the door opened before you could even twist the doorknob, revealing what you thought was your roommate. She had beautiful sun-kissed hair, one that blended in so nicely with her skin tone and made her brown eyes pop out as well as widen as they landed on you. 

"hey!" she happily greeted you. 

"hi.. are you uhm.."

"liz, im liz" a sweet welcoming smile appeared on her plump pink lips and the corner of her eyes wrinkled. "im y/n" you smiled back, walking into your shared room taking in what side she's claimed seeing how organized her side was, while yours was bland and naked and in desperate need of decorating. 

Regardless, her warm welcoming made your shoulders relieved from any stress. 

"Is this your first year?" she asked as she offered her help with your heavy suitcases. "oh yeah! is it yours as well?"

her head shook allowing you to hand her one of your bags. "second year actually." 

"Well I'm glad I have someone who already knows her way around, I'd be lost without a navigator." that drew out a lovely laugh from her. "Of course, just ask me anything when you're lost. the nearest bathroom, classroom, bar, your next play thing.." 

"Yeah, no." 

she grinned at your answer. "well, welcome to yale y/n"

The next few hours you spent unpacking all your clothes, storing them away in your new closet and pretending like you weren't already feeling homesick. Liz carried out most of the conversations as she helped you out with the organization process. She mentioned the nearby Starbucks that was actually inside the campus not that far from the girls dormitories as well as mentioning her recent messy breakup with her ex. 

but she also mentioned hockey. it was your families favorite sport except yours due to the lack of interest in sports themselves. Liz continued to babble as she sat down cross-legged on your bed. "You should totally come with me to watch sometime." 

"hockey isn't really my thing.." 

"Well, at least come to the first one, give it a try, come on. you didn't come to the world's best university to miss out on the hot hockey boys!" 

you raised your eyebrow up, barely looking up from your new closet seeing how everything sat neatly on the shelves and hangers. first impressions did matter, and she was right. you couldn't miss out on anything while attending this school. 

"alright."

The first day of school is always nerve wrecking. faces you don't know, classes you can't locate, and an alarm that didn't wake you up on time, leading to you being a tad bit late to your first class that took time at nine a.m

you took in the sight of students engaging in conversations walking side by side as they exchanged what they did over the summer. you couldn't help but tug a bit at the end of your shirt in nervousness. 

your running thoughts were interrupted by an arm wrapping around yours. 

"Are you nervous?" Liz asked you. she had on a cute outfit, her short plaid skirt and leg warmers placed over her mary janes, ones that matched the ones you were wearing right now. 

"Hey, we got the same shoes." you pointed down. 

"oh! yeah, I saw yours the other day and I just had to get them, aren't they the cutest?" a giggle spilled from her lips as you nodded. you found it a little weird how she bought them without telling you, she does overshare but you didn't look too far into it. 

it's just shoes. 

"So what's your first class?" she asked, taking out her phone, looking through her schedule hoping to have at least one class with you today. 

"oh, I have uh.." you as well took out a folded piece of paper from your pocket. "English." 

"ugh," she groaned at the confirmation that you won't be sharing any classes today. "I have my advanced art courses all day today. anyways tell me if you see any hotties."

you rolled your eyes playfully waving 'goodbye' before watching her disappear into the crowd. 

The feeling of being alone made you grip the handle of your tote bag a little bit tighter, scanning the new building in front of you. 'humanities center..' 

no 

'literature hall...' there it is. After successfully finding your class across the courtyard, you entered, allowing the scent of old books and polished wood to greet you. 

you took a seat watching as the students flowed in, some chatting pairs, or some alone like you as they found a seat. you weren't too in the front but not too far in the back either. "Can I sit here?" a voice from the side asked you.

His brown layered hair framed his face as it curled a bit from the back of his neck. The boy had a few tattoos on his arm that disappeared into the sleeve of his shirt. He looked intimidating with those biceps and.. was that guy liner?

"oh, yeah sure go ahead" you said, offering the emo-looking boy the seat next to you. 

"thank you, im choso" 

Choso placed his bag next to his feet as he scooted a bit closer to the table. He looked so nonchalant you almost forgot to give your name as well. 

"im y/n."

The rest of the day was full of new names, syllabi, campus maps, and an agenda full of new dates. By late afternoon, your shoulder was already killing you from the amount of textbooks you had stored in your bag. 

"Need some help with that?" a boy from behind offered.

It was the boy from your literature class, choso. He didn't even give you a chance to respond before his hand reached out to take the weight of your shoulder, literally, and placed it on his instead. "Thank you." you smiled in appreciation, a bit out of breath as if you had just walked a mile. He gave you a small nod. "Sorry we couldn't talk much in class. professor estrada hates when he's interrupted." 

"you've had him before?" you asked interested. It seems that you haven't met a person your grade so far. 

"no, my friend has. He complained about that class all the time last year, which made him change majors. plus he's a bit infamous around the campus anyways" 

you raised a brow. "he's that bad?"

a soft chuckle escaped him. "depends on the person honestly. some work well under pressure while others don't." he glanced down at you. "you headed to the dorms?"

you shrugged. "I guess, I don't know where else to go." 

he hummed in thought for a second. "Want to watch me play hockey?"

you're not sure why you accepted his offer. Your family were pocket fans, Liz was a hockey fan, so why were you here sitting all pretty on the bench with a few other students spread around the bleachers as you watched your new friend from afar. The Yale hockey team was a decent size, around 25 students. you let your eyes study each one. Liz was right, they were all definitely girl dinner. 

a boy was placing his long dark hair into a bun, casually pulling the loose strands of his bangs behind his ear. another, lean and blond, and a jawline sharp enough to cut any surface was taking off his glasses. and one was.. giving out his autograph to a group of girls.

What is this, a romcom? you blinked a few times processing the scene that was straight out of a disney movie from the 2000's. 

His hair was white, resembling the ice rink they were in, treating it like his personal meet and greet instead of the place where he plays. after catching yourself staring a bit too long, you dragged your sight back to choso, watching him get ready. 

"didn't think I'd find you here. thought you weren't into sports?" Liz sat down next to you, cutting you from your thoughts. she had a smug grin on her face. 

"here for moral support for uh.." you looked at choso's jersey. "number twenty three."

"Oh girl, you're looking at the wrong number, check out number ten." 

you looked for the number she said before you finally found it, it was the white haired boy that was flirting with girls that were wearing skirts way too short for a place this cold. "What's with the fangirls?" you nodded to the small crowd. 

"that's just the satoru effect being put into use."

"satoru..?" you repeated the name testing it out. "yep, behold, the star played in both hockey and in romance, well not really. he hasn't dated anyone like ever.." 

"So he's a type of frat boy?" 

Liz shook her head. "no, he doesn't party. He's too busy studying and making sure his gpa doesn't drop a number. but he's every girl's type." you glanced from her to him, seeing how his pearly whites flashed at the girls before he slid away, jokingly bumping into a teammate. 

but then you looked at choso. He wasn't surrounded by any fangirl, no spotlight, and no distraction. 

"wanna grab hot chocolate ?"

"in early august?" you pulled your eyes away from choso before they even had the chance to meet him. Liz shrugged. "never too early to get into that christmas spirit."

"I think I'll pass, I'm here to watch my friend."

she whistled. "who, number twenty-three? he's a snack, you going after him?" you shook your head. "no.. I think I like him only as a friend." 

and you were being honest. despite only meeting choso a few hours ago, the boy had a type of aura that made you feel calm and you enjoyed his presence already. 

the buzzer sounded across the rink, officially kicking off the game. you moved your body a bit forward, resting your hands on your cheeks as you kept your eyes on choso. but no matter how much you tried to focus on him, you kept looking back at the one who held the number ten.

he moved quickly and calculated, he knew what he was doing. every time he touched the puck, the crowd of girls cheered. they erupted into even more chaos when he scored. you found it a bit weird, obsessing over a boy when maybe half of them had boyfriends of their own.

the practice ended after a few more practice rounds. you stood up as choso exited out the ring, your eyes meeting. "hey y/n." he greeted as he approached you. "thanks again for watching." you smiled. "of course. its the first time I've ever been fully interested in hockey."

he smirked faintly at that.

liz cleared her throat, making herself be known. choso gave her a thin lipped smile, the type of awkward one you'd give to a family member that claims to have changed your diaper once when you were five months old.

the doors opened again and its as if the energy itself shifted. satoru stepped out, dragging a hand up to his messy hair to ruffle it. he noticed you and choso making him slow down slightly.

"so I was wondering if you wanted to exchange numbers or insta since you know we're in the same class.. and.. stuff" choso adverted your attention back to him. you nodded mumbling a soft 'sure' as you pulled out your phone to give him your instagram handle.

Satoru's arm wrapped around choso's shoulder. "hey man, finally settling down?" this was the first time you heard his voice. it was smooth and seductive. choso could feel his shoulder tensing just slightly as he typed out your handle onto his phone, quickly following you before handing you back your phone.

"just making a friend."

satoru's eyes flickered up to you. "oh? she doesn't look your type."

okay well ouch?

"I said I'm just making a friend, satoru." choso repeated, now a bit more irritated which only made the white haired boy pat his back. "calm down I'm just teasing. I'll see you tomorrow."

but before he could fully disappear, he glanced over his shoulder to stare at you one last time. no words. just a look. you didn't realize you were holding in your breath before choso began talking again.

"ill text you later."

"yeah.. me too."

you watched him walk away as well.

"so.. are we team ten or team twenty three?" liz asked, nudging you with her elbow. you frowned.

"we're team shut up."

taglist : @not-aya @nooo-onee @pickledsoda (ask to be added !)

[fuanteinasekai]

Oh, hey. Maybe this is a good time to post the thing I've been trying to write for… more than a year. It keeps getting too long because I'm basically covering the entire manga, so instead I'm just going to hit the biggest points and let you fill in the gaps yourself.

In Volume 1, Natsume meets Tanuma for the first time. Much of the story revolves around Natsume's inability to tell what is ordinary and what is yokai, a problem he refers to twice as his "unstable world." This weakness is a major running theme, and he shares it with all other powerful characters. It is likely one of the main reasons they choose to live in isolation or in the exorcist/magical world. Focusing on this in the story about meeting Tanuma may have originally been meant to highlight his fear that Tanuma wasn't real, but it's the perfect foundation for his long-term arc.

In the author's note for Taki's storehouse arc (Volume 11), Midorikawa-sensei says this:

自分はおかしいのかもしれないと思っていた田沼にとって、不安定だった世界を肯定してくれる夏目の存在は大きな救いになったのに、自分はたいして夏目の力になれないというのはもう田沼が友人として抱えていかなければならないジレンマかなという気がします。 "For Tanuma who thought there might be something wrong with him, the presence of Natsume who affirmed his world that was unstable is a great relief, but Tanuma can’t really support Natsume himself. This is a dilemma I have a feeling he must be facing by now as a friend."

This "world that was unstable" is a clear reference to Natsume's "unstable world," but cannot actually be the same so it must be a parallel. The simplest possible interpretation is that the ideal solution to Tanuma's "dilemma" would be "affirming" Natsume's "world that was unstable." That is, the ideal conclusion to Tanuma's "dilemma" arc would be to somehow help Natsume navigate the boundaries between the yokai and ordinary world. In this same story, Tanuma is able to sense the location of the demon's leg before Natsume can see it.

In Volume 12's Omibashira arc, Tanuma spends most of the story sensing yokai-related things: Sensei not being Natsume, the bottle, the presence of the monkey oni, the separation of the yokai world itself, and Omibashira. Each of these is accompanied by the same "zawa" sound effect that accompanies Natsume encountering strong yokai energy. Tanuma gets hurt because he doesn't trust his senses, and tries to confirm Omibashira visually.

In Volume 16, Tanuma reveals he always knew Ito-san was not what she claimed to be, and that he had come to believe she was "an ayakashi or something like that" once he learned they were real. The same story reveals that Natsume's presence has stabilized Tanuma and allowed him to grow stronger physically and have fewer headaches and illness. In other words, Natsume's power offsets the negative effects of Tanuma's power.

In Volume 22, Tanuma has a vision while Natsume sleeps peacefully, adding another dimension to his sensitivity. Later he tells Natsume the staircase yokai is not the one he dreamed of because its face was different and it didn't feel "malevolent." As is often the case, Tanuma was dismissive of his vision (ability) until Natsume validated him.

Later in the same volume, we finally get the origin story for the Book of Friends. This implies a major turning point in the manga as a whole.

Tenjou-san, in Volume 23, is the story of the four boys and Homura-sempai's investigation of the eponymous possibly-cursed painting. At one point, Tanuma says this:

夏目の世界はあいまいなものがいっぱいなんだな　おれは…やっぱり時々夏目と同じ世界を見てみたいなと思うけど　見えるものが違うからこそ確認しあえることもあるのかもしれないなって "Your world is full of uncertain things, huh? I… still feel like I want to see the same world as you, sometimes. But I also think sometimes it's because we see differently that we can confirm things with each other."

The context for this is not the painting, but rather Natsume's fear that Homura-sempai could be a yokai—Natsume's "unstable world." Natsume brings this up again at the end, but Tanuma's role remains unresolved. That's because this dialog was never meant to set up the end of Tenjou-san—it's meant to set up the end of his entire arc. Tanuma couldn't help yet because he doesn't accept that he can "judge the authenticity" of magical objects until By Invitation of the Queen in Volume 29. Realizing he can also sense who is human and who is yokai is yet to come. If he can tell the difference, that means his power offsets the negative effects of Natsume's power.

In Intermission Detectives, Volume 24, only Tanuma is able to ignore the unimportant and notice the significant yet tiny details. Nishimura and Kitamoto are preoccupied with the leading lady and what her beauty implies, while Natsume is too distracted by the possibility of a yokai in disguise to think about anything else, arguably too distracted to enjoy the movie. That means every Tanuma story between Tell Me Your Name and Village of the Sleeping Vessels has had a yokai in disguise—or the possibility of one—as a major plot point.

Village of the Sleeping Vessels introduces Tanuma's "light," an ability he has had few opportunities to use. The same story introduces Ban, a character who can somehow judge the authenticity of magical objects. Ban's name literally means "companion."

This is the beginning of the "female collector" storyline, which also has undertones of "growing up." Hence the combination of Reiko (Natsume's foil must grow up before him), Natsume's interest in magic (to be independent of his mentors/protectors), and Sensei's vulnerability as well as his frequent long excursions (to motivate Natsume's independence or reliability). Tanuma is central because he is meant to be Natsume's life-long partner, without whom Natsume cannot have the life he wants.

In an author's note, Midorikawa-sensei describes Tanuma as "surely able to support Natsume, but unable to come." This is a marked shift from the critical tone of most previous Tanuma notes, a shift which is maintained throughout the "female collector" stories. This is also the same "support" from Tanuma's "dilemma."

Like Intermission Detectives, By Invitation of the Queen (Volume 29) juxtaposes Tanuma's high perceptiveness with Natsume's confusion and fear of yokai in disguise. The same story is Natsume's first physical meeting with the "female collector" Shinobu. It is not a coincidence that she meets him at Tanuma's side, or that Tanuma is the "hero" of the story. His strengths will be relevant to the rest of Shinobu's storyline. Natsume is the one who realizes Tanuma has the power to sense what is real or not, and Tanuma himself is initially skeptical. However, his description of the "occult" fakes as "clean or pure" and Ban's dolls "oozing something sinister" suggests that he is sensing spiritual energy. It is also similar to how he described the yokai in the Volume 22.

Portrait of a Girl implies that Tanuma's power is significant through Matoba and Ban. Matoba's curiosity and the constant threat of meeting Tanuma builds tension, and Ban's shock at Tanuma's ability to see the light in the mirror suggests that they share the same rare ability. The ceiling yokai is able to hide from Ban by hiding from the mirror, implying Ban also shares Tanuma's weak sight. At another point, Natsume overhears an exorcist talking about his ability to use "good tools" even with fading (weak) sight. This isn't about Natsume or the regular exorcists, so it must be about Ban and his dolls, Tanuma, or both.

いつも友人の側に行きたい気持ちを抑えて蚊帳の外で待たなければならない田沼がすでに内側にいる状況 [や、一族の中で生きてきた的場さんの身内の事情や術具についてなど、] 描くことができて嬉しかったです。田沼は実際は出来ることは多いのに本人出来ることなんか大して無いと思ってしまうタイプかもしれないと感じました。 "I was happy drawing things like Tanuma, who has always had to wait outside the mosquito net, repressing the desire to go to his friend's side, but is suddenly on the inside […] I have a feeling Tanuma might be the type who thinks there's not much he can do when in reality he can do many things." (Volume 31) [n.b. the "mosquito net" idiom was used in Nitai-sama when Tanuma described being allowed to help "instead of being outside the mosquito net"]

Matoba is almost suicidally obsessed with "tools," his sister (perhaps spitefully) collects them, and Ban is a scout for magical things, so it makes sense during this storyline to focus on Tanuma's own ability to scout. However, there's little to no set-up for this ability in the manga. Even Tenjou-san, which was the perfect opportunity to hint at his ability with the painting, hinted at identifying yokai instead. The coexistence of the "pure" painting with the "pure" humans is not coincidental, but a retroactive hint to future readers that the ability to recognize what is "real" is the same whether the the "real" applies to an object or person.

So while Tanuma's ability to scout "powerful" tools may be important in the short term, it's a mere step toward his true power. The ultimate goal is to reveal that Tanuma's sensitivity to spiritual energy extends to yokai as well, and that he can tell Natsume what is yokai and what is not and even, it seems, what is malevolent and what is not. Through this, he would become irreplaceable, the only person Natsume can trust to give him peace, to affirm his unstable world, and to allow him to be as indifferent to random yokai as Shinobu.

The only thing that works against this is the inconsistency with which Tanuma appears to notice yokai. But this has been addressed through his "ability to judge authenticity." When Natsume first points out that Tanuma knew the box wasn't real, Tanuma initially dismisses his feelings as a "hunch," before going on to talk about how he never had a chance to be exposed to fakes before. He then admits that the "occult" collection felt "clean or pure," but he only noticed because he had Ban's dolls as comparison just before.

Natsume himself describes Tanuma to Natori as "cautious" and "deep thinking." In other words, he is the opposite of impulsive, only acting when he has gathered enough evidence to make a case. Tanuma would have felt things many times without reacting until he had more to go on. Fun fact: when Natsume first brings up Tanuma's power, he actually starts by talking about how he was "spinning in circles" "confusing [human matters] for ayakashi matters" unlike Tanuma who "sees people clearly." Midorikawa-sensei is a troll.

Tenjou-san (yes, again) addresses this gap from a different angle. When Natsume considers telling Nishimura and Kitamoto the truth, Tanuma suggests Natsume still needs the "space to be treated normally" "unlike me, who always worries and asks if there's something there." In other words, Tanuma feels bad about talking about yokai unnecessarily, which means he's not going to mention a feeling he doesn't think is important. This likely goes back to Volume 5, when Natsume admitted to lying about yokai and wanting to keep things "normal" between them. (The original Japanese is an incomplete sentence, but this is what he seemed to be getting at.) This is why, for example, Tanuma says he "didn't want to bother" Natsume when he wasn't sure he was possessed in Volume 8. He's not just unsure of himself—he's actively avoiding potential validation to give Natsume space. This is also probably why he gets more… excitable recently—the more Natsume talks about yokai, the less Tanuma feels the need to hide his interest.

All of this only addresses Tanuma's power and how it solves his dilemma. It is heavily implied that Tanuma's dilemma is at the heart of his sense of inadequacy and, in turn, his "characteristic sense of distance" from Natsume. This suggests that the reveal of the true extent of his power could lead to him being more open and finally closing that gap. But I'm not quite sure of this. Despite Tanuma's feeling of a "wall" between him and Natsume and being "unable to keep up," they're much closer than they used to be. This could mean that it's their closeness that will lead to revealing his power, thereby centering Natsume's emotional development rather than Tanuma's insecurity. And that matters because their emotional bond is at least as important as what their powers mean to each other.

While the hints at Tanuma's power have been comparatively subtle, his emotional support has not. Throughout the manga, Tanuma has helped guide Natsume through his anxiety and emotional trauma. He listens to him talk about his grandmother being an unwed mother with powers like him, confronts him over hiding his true needs, and sees through his lies or silence when others can't. In Volume 13, Tanuma's role in Kitamoto's story implies that he grounds Natsume and allows him to accept attachments to the town and the Fujiwaras. In the Volume 26 notes, Midorikawa even says that Natsume is able to deal with "sorting out his feelings" by spending time with Tanuma without even talking. This emotional connection is particularly evident with the Fujiwaras, whom Tanuma is invested in because of their importance to Natsume. In Volume 20, for example, his conversation with Natsume about the Fujiwaras is clearly framed as something between the two of them, that Taki can only observe.

This Fujiwara theme makes its appearance in Portrait of a Girl when Tanuma gets invested in Morio's relationship with his adoptive parents. These characters are an obvious mirror for Natsume and the Fujiiwaras. At the end of the story, it is also Tanuma who resolves Natsume's feelings of anxiety about why Morio sold off all of his parents' belongings. I had previously thought of Tanuma's emotional support as a kind of parallel to his power, but the mingling of the above with Tanuma's increasing involvement with the exorcist/magic world changed my mind.

Tanuma's emotional support relies on his empathy, understanding of people, and ability to see what others don't. It's not one single thing. When Natsume talks about Tanuma's ability to "see people" he also brings up his "night vision" which is a completely separate ability from all of the above. There is overlap in the abilities he uses to help Natsume with the ordinary world (e.g. Fujiwaras) and the abilities he uses to understand what is yokai and what is ordinary. This is why By Invitation of the Queen is simultaneously about Tanuma's ability to see through people and his ability to sense the "purity" of the box. Tanuma's extraordinary perceptiveness is an entire collection of talents, all of which he can use to see what Natsume can't, to give Natsume inner peace, to allow him to live in the moment instead of constantly looking over his shoulder. But only if he's there—just as Natsume can only offset Tanuma's sensitivity if he's present.

If Natsume is allowed to support Tanuma in the same (or similar) ways, and if Tanuma realizes how powerful he truly is and Natsume allows him to help, then their relationship will be truly balanced. They will be able to support each other in all ways, in all worlds, without worrying about being too much or too little.

This is what makes Tanuma the Sasame to Natsume's Misuzu—without whom Natsume cannot be "fulfilled" even when "surrounded by liveliness." It's what makes him the light in the dark forest, Natsume's guide through the fog that all with sight suffer. Tanuma may need Natsume to live, but Natsume needs Tanuma to live.

[junedenim]

2014

beneath the boardwalk, part 12 (series masterlist)

fireside

warnings: slutty behavior

word count: 15k

I found out Alex and Arielle broke up through Facebook. Of course, because it's Alex we're referring to—a man who never touched social media with a 39½ foot pole—I didn't find out through a relationship status update, I found out through an article. I cursed the Facebook gods for knowing I would click on the article and nearly didn't but I did because I had to know whether it was legitimate or just gossip. The article didn't indicate much either way. I made the assumption I would hear about it if it were true and clicked off Facebook before it fully rotted my brain.

I spent the majority of January in England. I had gone back for the holiday season but had been convinced to stay through the new year through the pull of London. I caught up with old friends, most notably my old neighbor, Lee, and her two girls who I used to babysit and who were now both teenagers. I felt old.

When I returned to New York, my agent told me that one of the short stories from my upcoming book would be featured in the New Yorker. Featured, not just plain old staff writing, a full-on feature. Right up there with the likes of Shirley Jackson, Truman Capote, and George Saunders (okay, maybe not up there, but I have it in common with them). It was a nice start to the new year.

Fennel and Kaka had a dinner party in celebration, or just to have an excuse to throw a dinner party, they like those kinds of things. I wore a slutty dress Fennel provided and got drunk on champagne.

The day after this beautiful fancy party, Opal took me out for a proper celebration. Shitty bars and shitty clubs to get drunk off tequila. This was followed by the worst hangover of my life which made me vow to give up alcohol (fat chance).

Alex called me during this time and I missed it. There was a good chance people thought I was dead for several days. I didn't answer my phone and only got out of bed to vomit. I never returned Alex's call but he called me right before Arctic Monkeys performed at Madison Square Garden. I assume the call was some form of an invitation to attend but I wouldn't have gone anyway. I watched their cover of "All My Loving" on YouTube a week later and decided that I was only pissed that I missed that song.

Through Fennel, I had met Isaac Gaunt, a fashion photographer from London. He asked to do a photoshoot with me, which could've been a good way to be sex trafficked but considering the guy had shot for Vogue, I took my chances.

Isaac and the photos he took of me unlocked a whole new world for me. One where I would be referred to for my looks. All those years of being concerned over my author photo seemed to be indicating something.

My agent had no experience with fashion and graciously suggested I get another agent who specialized in it. She proved that not all agents are money-hungry monsters. So, I stayed with her and said I wanted her to handle fashion the same way she handled books because I was still a writer after all.

Because my image had cultivated somewhat of a following over the first few months of the year, I was offered more and more opportunities and got to feel like a diva when I turned down offers because I was simply "too busy." I loved it. It fed into my ego and made me feel way better about myself after feeling like shit for so long.

Of course, the buzz only lasted for so long but because I had the luxury of dictating my new career and whatever direction it was heading, I got to control the rush. I quite liked being busy too, especially when it meant getting invited to cool parties. Thus, I drank more champagne.

I got an invitation to this one party at the Museum of the City of New York. The building itself being this glorious display of Gilded Age glamour. I believe it was a fundraiser for the museum but also a celebration of the city and the talent it cultivated. I don't think I fell into that category, I just knew the right people, which is really just what it's all about. Knowing the right people.

Most people didn't know who I was and those who did recognize me didn't know I was British, which meant that they hadn't read anything I had written. So, I guess I was just a face now. I thought that would piss me off more but I liked being this mystery. I was luckily still taken seriously and people were intrigued when I said I was a writer instead of rolling their eyes and thinking I was some dimwit with looks who claimed to be a writer but actually barely knew how to string a sentence together. 

At the MCNY, on the luxurious staircase, dressed in something that was expensive and vintage and left me fearful of spilling something on it the whole night, I ran into Jackson. We stared at one another and with a nod of each of our heads, we passed one another with not a word uttered. I assume he was there with one of his clients but I went on and met up with a group of people who were slowly becoming my friends and didn't see him for the rest of the night.

It made me feel mature. I didn't feel a need to prove how fabulous I was and no need to spin the skirt of my dress around or sip my champagne with no care for him. I was perfectly comfortable with a small smile and seeing that he was doing just fine. It made me feel like I must be doing just fine too.

*

On the first coatless day of the year, I got fro-yo with Opal and her friends, Nadia, Sophie, and Mina. Opal's birthday was the following week but I would be out of town so we had a mini girl's day with the latest craze of fro-yo. I had met all the girls before but only had a close kinship with Mina after she crashed at my place following a night of clubbing.

After buying our combination of swirls, we sat in Tompkins Square along a bench. By the time our fro-yo was melted, the topic of my goings next week arose. Opal asked, "How do you feel about seeing you-know-who?"

Nadia licked her spoon clean. "Who's you-know-who?"

"My ex-boyfriend," I informed. "I'm going to a wedding next week. It's his bandmate and my friend, Katie, getting hitched."

"Your ex-boyfriend is in a band?" Sophie questioned.

It was rather odd to me that my life had grown so far outward that people didn't know about Alex. I was grateful for it, specifically in terms of my career. My life moved on and my name was no longer followed by "Alex Turner's ex-girlfriend." It had been a new discovery that past year. Be it good PR people or, more likely, people in my line of work didn't care. 

Though, I was shocked Sophie didn't know.

"What are you going to wear?" Mina asked. I went simple since I was flying in from New York. It was a soft blue slip dress. There was nothing fancy about it other than the gorgeous colour.

In regard to running into Alex, I didn't care. Well, I mostly didn't care. Okay, I cared, but I didn't actively try not to. I wanted to be friendly and my expectations didn't go further than that. I wasn't nervous about it anymore. I cared more about Katie's wedding dress than what I would be wearing. In any scenario, that was an unanticipated form of growth out of self-absorbedness that I never believed I could reach. 

*

I cry at weddings. I am reduced to a blubbering fool. It's quite embarrassing. If I wasn't me, I would be making fun of me because being vulnerable is something I'm still not comfortable with despite how emotional I am. With Jamie and Katie, it felt understandable. They were a couple I watched grow together from two awkward kids to well-adjusted adults. It was an unexpected overwhelming feeling but Katie was so beautiful and I was jet-lagged. 

After grabbing a flute of champagne, I got my emotions under wraps and had small talk with the various attendees, many of whom I hadn't seen in years. I lucked out by finding AB and Shay, who I had no clue were attending, and buddying up with them by the bar.

I sipped my champagne, talked with them, and looked out at the crowd the whole time, slightly dreading or rejoicing whenever the moment would come that Alex and I locked eyes. Eye contact was generally avoided during the ceremony. I sat too many rows back and think my stomach would have fallen out of my ass if we looked at each other when two people were getting married. I much preferred the idea of a dramatic, but subtle and tamed, wedding reception gaze at one another. 

Breana found me during this time, sans Matt, which probably meant he was with Alex. As I hugged her, I feared Matt and Alex would come looking for her like she was some lost puppy. I felt ridiculous but Breana understood my predicament and didn't question why I was looking over her shoulder the whole time we spoke.

Cocktail hour wrapped with no sign of Alex, which meant I didn't get totally hammered before dinner. I was seated with AB and Shay, who were now engaged as well, and I spent the whole of our time together staring at the rock on her finger. 

Right around when I began to dive into dinner, I spotted Alex eating at his table. His back was to me. I wondered if we were intentionally seated that way so we didn't have to stare at each other from across the room.

Cake was given and I managed not to ball my eyes out during the first dance. AB and Shay escaped me to do their own dancing, I felt impossibly envious and deeply regretful that I had not shacked up with someone to bring as a plus one because weddings are disgusting and lonesome when you're watching all the cute couples dance.

I made friends with the only other single gal at my table, Dolly, one of Katie's friends. We travelled to the bar together with interlocked arms, despite the fact we barely knew each other. We both got a margarita and cheers to an okay night, whatever that might be.

"I haven't been to a wedding in years and suddenly it feels like everyone is getting married," Dolly said.

I hummed and swallowed my drink. "We're getting to that age when you're either a single loser or having babies."

"My younger sister is engaged and I don't even have a boyfriend. How much of a loser does that make me?"

I leaned against the bar and deposited my empty glass, requesting another one. "It makes you smart."

"Can you tell that to my parents?"

We shared a laugh and the bartender gave me my next margarita. A tap was felt on my shoulder and the voice rang through my ears, "Hey you."

I managed not to fully choke on the liquor running down my throat. I covered my mouth to prevent a major coughing fit or spitting the liquid out onto him. "Hi."

I wasn't sure what else to say. He stood there. I noted the uptightness in his posture. He smirked to hide his nervousness as suaveness. I knew he had to be nervous because I was too. I did get a kick out of him being the one to approach me. For a change, I no longer felt like the girl falling at his feet.

After too long of a silence staring at one another while Dolly surely thought we were looney, Alex asked, "How are you doing?"

I nodded. "Fine." I was being dry and rejecting, leaving nothing for him to grasp onto. This was the crossroads. I could be cold and watch him walk away dejected, getting immense pleasure for the power I had over him. However, who was to say I did not have that power over him anymore? Who's to say I wouldn't have just come off as awkward and a loser? A boring single loser.

I could’ve smiled and asked him how he was and acted out pleasantries that were likely too sweet to be believable coming from my lips. Silence hung and I wasn't sure what to do. I took a sip of my drink and Alex did the same with his. It was a game. Whoever finished their drink first had to speak.

"I've just been chatting with Dolly here," I told him. I lost. Or won. I wasn't sure. I requested another drink pulling myself further on the road of alcohol poisoning. "How've you been?"

"Fine." He was smiling—no more than that—a shit-eating grin. He was mocking me. He was two seconds away from breaking into an uncontainable laugh. "I've been fine. The usual."

I hummed like some wise old man. "Yes, the usual. And what would the usual be?"

He shrugged and swirled his drink, looking down at the spiral forming around his ice. I wasn't sure what game we were playing. I felt like breaking the ice but it slowly began to feel like we were freezing ice between us. Everything was awkward and cold and Dolly was just staring at the whole thing.

She threw her pickaxe into the mix. "Jane and I were just talking about how it feels like there are suddenly so many weddings this year. I've got two more I've got to go to in the summer."

Alex pulled himself away from his hypnotizing drink, adjusted his suit jacket, and swung back into action. "It does feel that way, doesn't it? I suppose that's what your late twenties is." His eyes bore themselves into me and he sipped on his drink.

"For some of us," Dolly said. "The rest of us are left to deal with the scraps."

"Aw," Alex rejected, "you ladies aren't scraps."

Dolly replied, "I never called us scraps. It's you men that are the scraps."

I giggled and Alex tossed between a frown and a chuckle like he couldn't decide how he was supposed to react. "The ones that haven't been potty trained yet," I joked.

"We aren't all so bad, you know," Alex said. "Some of us at least know how to aim."

It broke me out into an embarrassing laugh. One that had me trying my back to him and leaning on the bar because I couldn't bear for him to see me clutch my stomach and snort my drink out. Dolly and Alex laughed more at me than the joke and I turned back in shame as the two of them stared at me. "Sorry," I muttered through my amusement.

Dolly shook her head at me. "All these weddings have made me acutely aware of how single I am. I've become one of those people who bitches and moans about that to people I barely know."

I relaxed against the bar and sipped away. "Welcome to the club."

"The only benefit of being single at a wedding is a chance of catching the bouquet," she stated.

Alex stood amused by Dolly, chuckling at her and sliding his hands into his pockets. "If it makes you feel better I don't even get a chance to catch the bouquet." His eyes drifted to me a moment later like he was waiting for a reaction. My eyes moved to Dolly. I realized this was his way of informing me he was single. I didn't know how to take that.

"You two are very Debbie Downer," I said. "You're 28, not the 40-year-old virgin."

Dolly straightened up. "You're right. I'm spiraling too much. I should be focused on the open bar and having fun."

I lifted my drink. "That's the spirit."

"My friend's just gotten married. I'm chatting with old and new friends. I could stumble on the love of my life tonight instead of bitching and moaning. Or at least a plus one to the next wedding."

"Husbands are overrated anyway," I stated.

Alex chuckled, grabbing my attention again. I almost forgot he was standing there. "Is that the subject of your next book?"

I pointed a finger at him. "You know, that's not a bad idea. At least for an article."

Dolly placed her glass down on the bar. "I'm gonna hit the dance floor. Care to join me?" I wasn't sure which one of us her question was directed at.

Alex eyed me and I eyed Alex. I looked back at Dolly and told her, "I'll catch up with you after I finish my drink."

She looked at me with a hint of something that I refused to acknowledge. "Don't spend the whole night by the bar," she warned.

"I won't," I promised as she walked away.

I leaned back at the bar and focused on my drink and not the man in front of me. It was easier to digest my decision that way because of course I only stayed at the bar for my drink and not anything else at all. Totally. 

"She's nice," Alex said. He was still nursing the remaining liquor in his drink, even though the ice was beginning to melt.

"Shall I set the two of you up? We could be at your wedding this time next year," I quipped.

Alex feigned some laughter. "I don't think I'm ready for that kind of thing."

I narrowed my eyes. "Wives overrated?"

"I haven't found out yet." We stared at one another with the knowledge that whatever move followed would determine the rest of the night. I didn't finish my drink right away and he never took another sip of his. "How are you?"

"You already asked that."

He playfully rolled his eyes. "Right, you're fine."

It made me laugh and I dropped my shoulders, no longer feeling a need to be tensed up. "I've been busy but I like what I'm busy with."

"That's good."

"You?"

"The usual."

I rolled my eyes this time. "You're so funny, Al."

"What else would you like me to say?" The question posed so much with so little. We could run down a thousand different avenues with that one question. I could beg, I could insult, I could walk away.

I disguised my blushing as red-hot amusement. "That you've become a grand master in chess or learned how to get a ship into a bottle."

He gestured his glass at me. "You know, it's not as hard as you think."

"Come on, you have to give me something to work with. How else will I relentlessly make fun of you?"

"Like you don't already?"

I tossed my head back, pretending I was exhausted by him. I never could be it seemed. "I need new material."

He rattled the ice in his glass and moved closer to me, leaning his side against the bar. "I've been trying to learn magic tricks."

"Are you going to pull a coin out from behind my ear?" I hid my smile in my drink.

"I never said I was good at it." He placed his glass down at the bar like he was establishing his place there. "Have you learned any new tricks?"

I couldn't deny it then. He had confirmed it right there. He was flirting with me. I didn't know what to do with it or how to act on it so I just sipped my drink and didn't dare look at him. "I've taken to doing the New York Times crossword every morning."

He laughed at me. "How long does it take you before you look up the answers?"

I refused to allow him to see me blush. If I could dive into my drink, I would have. "Probably ten minutes." He laughed with me. "But they're just hints. I'm allowed hints. The Sunday one is really hard."

"I believe you. I know how smart you are."

His closeness was beginning to make me uncomfortable. I turned my body and leaned my back against the bar like I had so many times before. "There was a crossword clue mentioning Sheffield a few weeks ago."

"Really?” He perked up. Something about it felt so childlike or maybe like a dog who hears the rustling noise of a bag of treats. “What was it?"

"It was easy. Something like ‘stroller in Sheffield, 4 letters.’"

"Would it be a pram?" He looked at me expectingly like he was awaiting cheers to erupt.

"Ding ding ding," I sounded. "You're not as dim as I thought."

"Oh, thanks, Jane." He tried to act offended but his voice edged with mirth and a smile tugged on his lips.

He opened his mouth to speak but I beat him to it. "I think I'm going to go dance."

I placed my empty glass down on the bar and watched as he let delight spread across his face. "I should've known Backstreet Boys would get you on the floor."

I crossed my arms. "Well, it is ‘I Want it That Way’ after all. Just be happy I'm not screaming it in your ear." I turned away before he could say anything else. I joined Dolly in horrible dancing and singing as the margaritas blasted through me.

I lost Alex in the crowd. I think he might have been with Matt because I found Breana on the floor. I grabbed both her hands and spun around with her. At some point we had formed a mini circle of girls, kicking off our heels, and jumping around. 

Perhaps it was too early to be shaking the floor based on some side eye we were given. Out of breath, Breana and I decided to step back into our shoes and sit down. She leaned toward me. “So, what have you been up to?” Her eyes were wide and coming onto me alluringly.

I held my stomach and worked on quickly reinflating my lungs. “Are you hitting on me?”

She pushed away from me with a laugh. “No, I’m just curious what you’ve been up to this evening. You’ve got your eye on anyone?”

I stared at her. “No.”

“Come on, the only benefit of going stag to a wedding is taking someone home with you.”

I shook my head in disbelief. “When did everyone become so sex obsessed?”

“I don’t know. Maybe in the last year or so. When did you become so prudish, Jane?” She teased.

I countered, “I don’t know. Maybe in the last year or so.”

I debated the idea of it but thinking of trying to hook up with a stranger at a wedding kind of disgusted me. Maybe because Alex was there. I think I also didn’t want to be the one trying to seduce someone. I wouldn’t deny a Four Weddings & a Funeral situation, especially if I got to be Andie MacDowell.

Breana stood up and asked, “Should we get a drink?” 

I slumped in my chair. “Maybe. I feel like I might be too drunk already.”

She laughed. “There’s no such thing at a wedding.” She reached out and grabbed my hand. “Come on. I’ve barely had any. Take me to the bar.”

I guided her through the crowd to the deck of the bar. Along the way, I decided she was right and that free alcohol is free alcohol. We both indulged in cocktails with pieces of fruit and straws. “This is so sweet,” she said. “I feel like I’m gonna vomit.”

I gagged. “Don’t talk about vomit.”

Breana waved her hand to someone behind me, gesturing for them to come toward her. I looked behind me to find Matt and Alex. I kept my eyes trained on Matt and smiled and waved.

“Jane Cavendish!” Matt drunkenly cheered. “I heard you were crawling around.” He slung me into a hug. I returned it despite how sweaty he felt and how hard I was trying to not laugh at him.

“Matthew J. Helders III,” I returned his proper greeting.

Breana tucked her arm under Matt to keep him upright. “Maybe we should sit down,” she suggested. When Matt insisted otherwise, she decided for him, taking him over to their table, and leaving me with Alex.

He took a step forward towards me. “And I thought I was going to be the one to get hammered,” he said.

“Night’s young and the bar is still mighty full.”

He eyed my drink. “What’ve you got there?”

I stirred my straw, clunking the ice against the glass. “I believe it is called a woo woo.”

“A woo woo?”

“Yeah, it’s vodka, cranberry, and…” I took a sip. “Peach Schnapps. I’ve never had it before but I quite like it.” I eyed the hand around his glass. “And what do you have? Your bourbon,” I mocked, continuing to sip away at my woo woo.

“I go for reliability over experimentation.” He sipped his with a piercing stare at me.

I couldn’t tell if he was making a pointed comment at me or trying to make some eloquent quip. Either way, I didn’t care. I liked my woo woo too much to care. “You’ll never know the joys of a woo woo then.”

“Gimme a sip then.” He curled his fingers, beckoning me to move the drink toward him. 

I handed it over. “Sip out of the glass, not the straw.”

He chuckled. “I’ve kissed you but can’t share a straw with you.”

I was determined for my face to stay neutral. “You’ll get the bourbon taste all over it.”

“Oh,” he sarcastically said. 

He began to chug out of the glass until I pulled it out of his hand. “Get your own if you love it so much.”

“It tastes like candy floss.”

“No, it does not.” I sipped just to check. “It definitely doesn’t. I don’t think you’ve ever even had candy floss.”

“I’ve had it. Might have been 20 years ago now but I’ve had it,” he insisted.

I looked out at the crowd dancing. I had no clue what time it was or how long we had been there but it felt like no time had passed and hours had passed at the same time. I wasn’t sure what had a greater effect of time distortion Alex or alcohol.

“Have you danced at all?” I asked him.

He leaned an arm against the bar, slowly inching closer and closer to me. “Is that an invitation?”

“No,” I claimed, “I’m waiting for them to bring out more food. Can we get a second serving of cake?”

Alex chuckled, standing up straighter, no longer coming off as leering. “You haven’t had enough sugar from your woo woo?”

“Well, if I don’t have any food to soak up the alcohol than I won’t remember the rest of the night,” I told him.

“I think they’re bringing out pretzels soon.”

“Hard or soft?”

He smirked. Him and his dirty mind. “Soft, I think.”

“God, I could eat like five of those right now.” I felt like my stomach would rumble so hard it would shake the building causing a microearthquake. “What time are they doing that?”

He shrugged.

“You’re no help. You’re supposed to have the insider information,” I complained.

“I didn’t plan the wedding.”

“Go find out for me,” I commanded. I was desperately hungry and desperate for him to get away from me. It was his gaze that made me blush from a shared nervousness and awkwardness. I didn’t know how to act around him anymore, not with the way he was acting.

The wave of my hand shooed him away and he disappeared into the crowd again. I got a Moscow mule and went back to my seat. Before Alex returned, the soft pretzels were taken out and I was first in line. I got back in line before I even finished my first one.

When I spotted Alex across the room, I raised my pretzel toward him. He raised his woo woo back at me.

AB, Shay, Dolly, and I chatted over our pretzels and drinks at our table. Shay looked sleepy, leaning her head against AB’s shoulder, and I knew they’d be heading out within the next half hour. Dolly kept throwing her head back in laughter, even when the conversation didn’t prompt it.

I wiped my hands clean of salt and, encouraged by the group, chugged the rest of my drink. With the empty glass, I stood, curtsied, and headed to the bathroom. I was buzzed, maybe even drunk by that point, but still felt in control despite my heeled shoes growing bothersome. I was ready for another drink. Well, after I peed.

When I left the bathroom, he was standing there, acting casual with a drink in his hand and tapping his foot to the music, but I’m not sure why he would be standing outside the women’s bathroom unless there’s something I don’t know about.

I walked up to his profiled body. I placed my hands on my hips as the upturn slowly occurred on my lips. “Are you stalking me now, Al?”

“How was your pretzel?” He wasn’t being concealed. He couldn’t control his smirk and it felt like every second passed in a thumping heartbeat.

“Same as yours I’m sure.”

“I didn’t get one.”

“Well, maybe you should. They were good.”

“I was gonna pop out for a smoke. If you wanna.”

“Wanna what?”

“For old time’s sake.” 

The nostalgia played a role but the look on his face tugged at me and as much as I wanted to deny it, I wanted to go out and smoke with him too. For old time’s sake. I was also itching for a cigarette and bumming one off Al was as good as anything else.

Night had covered the outside world. The once warm day had turned into a breezy night. We walked to a park bench outside the venue. The wood grates pressed through the fabric of my dress and I took the opportunity to curl my legs behind me and rest my feet.

Alex handed a cigarette to me before pulling one out for himself. I startled him by reaching into his coat pocket, perfectly aware of where his lighter was. I lit my cig before tossing it to him. I leaned back against the iron bar and watched as the smoke left his lips.

“Talk,” I urged him.

“I’m in charge?” He questioned.

“You brought me out here.”

He chuckled. “Nicotine brought you out here.” 

I looked out onto the scene in front of us. It wasn’t particularly interesting. There was a car park and a field and the venue. There were some other people. A few were smoking, some leaving, and a few getting fresh air or trying not to act too drunk. “I’ve got a lot of addictions.”

“Woe is me much?”

I snorted. When I faced him, his eyes were already trained on me with a smile. “Have you forgotten who you’re talking to?”

“Dark and mysterious might’ve worked on me in college, Jane, but I know you better now.”

“You knew me pretty well back then,” I reasoned. “As I recall it.”

He hummed like if we looked into each other’s eyes long enough a wormhole would form and we’d be taken back in time to 2003. “You’ve always been easy to read. You did put up a good wall back then though.”

“Nothing compared to yours.”

He broke eye contact with me for the first time. He turned completely away, staring at whatever lay before him on the other side. “I have the reputation for it, I’m sure.” He looked back at me like he couldn’t resist it for too long. It burned me. He could have put his cigarette out on me for all I know. It burned a hole through the center of me. Too much. Too hurtful.

“Well, I was still able to read you pretty well.”

“More than I would’ve liked,” he said. “There I go sounding all despondent. How’s your next book going?”

I shrugged. “Somewhere. It’s been a little complicated lately. New ventures. And a new agent.”

“Ah, the post-Jackson era?”

“Yeah, kind of fucked that one up. Business wise.” There was no reason to get into all the personal propensities here or ever because I can barely recall that mess and have had limited desire to, clearly. “Lisa’s my new agent. She’s lovely and nice but it’s different. Jackson was my friend too. I guess I have a habit of not knowing how to keep friends.”

“It’s a natural part of growing up,” he tried to assure me.

“You are aware of whose wedding we’re at?” I longed to have friendships like Alex’s. I felt like I couldn’t hold onto those things. I think it’s easier for guys or maybe that’s just a grass being greener mentality. 

He couldn’t argue, instead breaking into laughter. “Yeah, you are a bit shit at keeping friends.”

“Hey!” I whacked him.

He held his hands up. “I’m kidding. You’re my friend after all.”

“The aforementioned: a bit shit. Case and point.”

He laid it out. “You make things too awkward.” 

“I think the situation is awkward.” Is there a proper way to interact with her ex? If so, I haven’t quite found it yet. There’s a fine line, especially with Alex. I felt we were always tiptoeing around our situation. That was the problem with never addressing anything. With no formal break-up, we never discussed and unravelled how things went down. We stayed tangled and flipped back and forth between the closest of friends to distant figures in one another’s lives. Here we tried to find the middle ground.

He pondered what I said for a minute. He sat with it and took a few drags before saying, “Who am I to talk? I’ve made my own messes.”

I almost didn’t ask but it was getting late, memories crept up on me, I felt warm, and he felt close. “With Arielle?”

Alex turned away, clearly not wanting to dive into it. I could see the environment pulling away at him too. He leaned against the bench’s backing and laid his arm on it. “Yeah, not that it would have worked out anyway.”

I felt myself leaning closer like he had lassoed me and was pulling me in. “What do you mean?”

He let out a half-suppressed laugh like he couldn’t help but laugh at the situation. He put out his cigarette but didn’t move an inch from his seat next to me. “Did you think you were going to end up with Jackson?”

To prevent the situation from travelling too deep, I leaned my temple against my fist, and joked, “I don’t know. Cavendishes are historically unhappy in their marriages.” I followed his suit and put out my cigarette, but stayed glued to my seat next to him.

He didn’t look at me when he said, “If you’re going to be unhappy at least aim wealthier than Jackson.”

I wanted to ask if he meant him.

I wondered what my next move should be. There was no longer anything between our fingers excusing us to sit outside. I felt my continued participation in the conversation would reveal something. I was probably reading into it too much, but it was sending him a signal I didn’t know if I wanted to give off.

“Should we go back inside?” I asked.

“Why?” His questioning sent a shiver down my spine. “You getting cold or something?”

“Thirsty,” I claimed. I feared he’d attempt to take his suit jacket off and throw it over my shoulders.

“You dipsomaniac.” He stood up beside me and we walked back in together toward the bar. I got a Tom Collins because I liked the way the bartender decorated the glass with the lemon slice and a drink would distract me anytime I needed to think of something to say.

Alex got something boring. I don’t remember. “What number is that for you?”

I stirred and thought. “I don’t know. I guess that says it all.” I stared out at the crowd of people on the dancefloor shimming to “Billie Jean” in a wild manner. It comforted me that the age of the crowd had levelled out and the sobriety of the crowd had diminished. “Have you danced at all this evening?”

“I’m not that drunk yet.” He took a mighty gulp. “You offering?”

I shook my head. “I don’t want my toes broken.”

He rolled his eyes. “I’m a good dancer.”

“Not when you’re drunk.” Alex would shake, thrash, and toss when drunk dancing. He loses all control of his limbs and his coordination is deadly for someone who already suffers in the department. “What song would get you on the floor?”

He didn’t miss a beat. “Chicken Dance.”

“This isn’t a school dance. Serious answer.”

“Why? You gonna go give the DJ a request?”

“I’m just curious. No need to accuse.”

“Some Spice Girls.” He smirked.

I glared at him. “Don’t mock me now.”

“Let’s get it on,” he offered.

“Huh?” Uncertainty lied in my reaction.

He raised an eyebrow suggestively. “Marvin Gaye,” he clarified. 

“You’re not funny.”

“Then why are you smiling?”

The booming of “Single Ladies” blasted through the room interrupting any proper answer. I held my glass out to him. “Keep it safe for me?” I asked.

He nodded, wrapping his fingers around the cold glass. “Good luck,” he taunted.

I stuck my tongue out and headed to the girl-filled dancefloor. We bumped shoulders with one another and Katie pretended to throw it several times before finally releasing it. The bouquet twisted and turned and flew through the air before it landed directly into Dolly’s hands. She squealed and clapped her hands together, having won the ultimate prize. 

When I returned to Alex and teased me with a pout on his lips. “I’m sorry you lost.”

I took my drink back and took a quick sip. “Eh. It’s probably better if I'm not the next to get married. Logically it’s actually Breana right?”

“Does it count if you’re already engaged?”

“I have no clue.” I sipped away and he stared at me. I felt like I was about to melt under his gaze. I almost asked him why he was but I knew why. Alcohol, wedding, single, it wasn’t hard to put two and two together. So. “Say it.”

“What?” He questioned.

I dropped my drink onto the bar with a blatant stare in my eye. 

He shrugged like he wasn’t being obvious.

“Okay,” I sighed. I picked my drink up and finished it off. 

I was prepared to walk away when the beginning notes of “Spice Up Your Life” began to play. Alex was taken way by laughter. Through his chuckles, he asked, “Did you request it?”

“No,” I said, “you saw me the whole time.”

He grabbed my hand tightly. “It’s fate.” With that he walked toward the dancefloor, dragging me behind him. I was laughing too. I couldn’t help it. I was happy. And drunk but that made me happy too. 

His hand was warm and he felt firm. He dropped it when we reached the floor but we moved and jumped like we were toddlers still learning how to stand properly. He made faces and moved in a way that made unstoppable laughter wrack through me. I felt buzzed from the inside out, every limb, bone, vein affected by him.

It was too much. Drunk I could handle it but even the power of him made me feel nauseated as if it was eating me alive. I was risking too much. The fun of it was slowly overtaking me, wrecking the moves I had made to change things.

After a few more songs, the music cut. We watched as Jamie and Katie left and with it, the reception was pretty much over. I turned to Alex, who was already looking at me. Always looking first. “I’m glad I got to see you,” I earnestly told him.

“You leaving me now?” I kept feeling like he was pulling my leg. He was constantly smirking at me like he was playing some trick on me. Like there was some inevitable shoe about to drop.

“Everyone is leaving now.” The room felt like it had emptied quickly, a stark contrast to the packed reception. 

“Do you wanna…?” He scratched the back of his neck.

I laughed at him. I’m not sure why. I think because he reminded me of his younger self. Even with the gelled hair and pushed-back shoulders, he still kept his awkward mannerisms and inability to get to the end of sentences. “Do I wanna what? Know?”

“Shut up.” His eyes fluttered slowly. “Talk to me more. I’ve got a mini bar.”

“You’re inviting me to your hotel room?” I raised my eyebrows at the implication. 

“Yeah. Don’t be so dirty, Janie.” He hadn’t called me that in a while. “I just want to catch up more. I miss talking to ya.” 

I stared at him blankly. “Right. Okay. I’ll get my purse and coat. I assume this is all on your tab.”

“Overpriced little bottles are on me. I’ll meet you out front.”

*

We sat on the carpet hotel room floor which I’m sure was probably covered in all kinds of germs and diseases but that night it was covered with little empty bottles and Alex and I leaning against the bed and dresser respectively.

I sat barefoot and he rubbed my feet. I don’t think I asked him to, it was just out of instinct. I couldn’t protest because they ached so much. He had taken off his suit jacket and loosened his tie enough that he might as well have just taken it off. There was no need to keep up appearances in front of one another.

I downed the little vodka bottle. “I don’t think I’ve ever had anything from the mini bar. My mother usually came prepared.”

“We did that one time,” he reminded me. “In Bristol. You got so hammered I doubt you remember.”

I giggled. “I remember the hangover. And I’m sure I’ll remember the one I’ll have tomorrow.”

“Drink some water.”

I shook my head. “Nah. I haven’t reached that level of intelligence yet. Plus, I don’t think I can get off the floor.”

He slumped against the bed like a ragdoll. “Yeah, I don’t think I can either.”

“We should just stay here forever.” It was a joke. Intended to be one, at least.

Alex smiled. “Yeah. Okay.” He moved his head around to stay awake and rubbed his eyes. “Make me laugh.”

“How?”

“I don’t know. You always find a way.”

I thought but humour abandoned me at that moment. It felt like all the funny had been kicked out of me. I decided to spill my guts. “On the plane ride here I decided to watch Eyes Wide Shut because I had never seen it before. I wasn’t aware of the massive orgy and the flight attendant had to come over and tell me that I couldn’t watch porn on the flight. So that was fun.”

Alex had fallen over into a fit of laughter. It eased me up and my embarrassment felt a little lighter when I knew it brought joy to him. “I’m going to tell some gossip mag that Jane Cavendish watches porn on planes.”

I kicked him with my foot. “Shut up.”

He collected himself and sat up straight. His look held so much in it. He looked like remembering and I wanted to experience every moment we had ever had together all at once. I looked away instead. But he didn’t and I could feel it. And then he said it. “I missed you.”

And like that, I was pulled back to him. My eyes looked into his and we were transmitting a longing we couldn’t dream of acting on. I smiled. “Me too. I’m used to it.”

He dropped his head. “Fuck.” His eyes plucked up. “Don’t say things like that to me.”

I crossed my brows. “Why?”

“‘Cause it’ll be what pounds through my head every night. Every day. How fucked up everything got. I’m wishing—I don’t know.” He rubbed his hands over his face, trying to erase himself.

I tucked my knees up to my chest. “I think it always was, Al. No need to beat yourself up over it.”

He stared at me as if to say, “Do you know who you’re talking to?”

I giggled. “We should move,” I suggested.

“No,” he whined.

With every fibre in me, I fought to stand up, eventually beating the effects of hotel-provided liquor. “Come on, mister.” I reached my hand down to him. He intertwined himself with me. Instead of me pulling, he yanked me down. Before I could shout a note of surprise, he silenced me. He kissed me.

It didn’t stop. He fought hard and I didn’t reject it. I was a phony and I could spout words of it being over for as long as I wanted but I don’t know if anyone ever believed it. How could they when it felt so good to kiss him? It was delicate and sloppy but I was sloppy too so I didn’t care one bit. It wasn’t about precision it was about emotion and I felt everything burning from the inside. It probably wasn’t smart but my other organs took over to act as my brain after it had been stifled from alcohol and his sweet words. I’d figure it out later. I’d keep him to myself for now.

We fell back on the carpet, my back hitting the floor and him towering over me. He tried to pull away to say something, to smile, or to breathe, but I wouldn’t allow it. I think if I looked him in the eye and he uttered a word it would have been too much so I didn’t allow it. 

We became those people that soiled the hotel room carpet. In our refusal to get up off the floor, Alex pushed my dress up and his pants down and it was quick so we didn’t have to think about it. I felt sweaty and he tucked his head in the corner of my neck and kissed it, breathing me in. I pushed everything away and laid there with him because that felt good and I felt loved, even if those things were to have faded away, I was left with memories of when it was there and this was just a reminder.

When it was over and his out-of-breath body pinned on top of my out-of-breath body, I lifted my hand and tried to run my fingers through his hair. I pulled a face he couldn’t see. “Ew,” I remarked. “I’m not used to your hair being so greasy.”

I felt the rhythms of his laugh against me. He was quiet but his hands pried into the space between my back and the carpet and he hugged me to him. The tightness and pressure of it weighed on me and I could’ve been eaten alive by it if I didn’t think it brought him so much comfort. He nudged his nose against me and for a moment I forget we were on the floor of some random hotel. It felt old and familiar. Things didn’t feel so foreign.

“Bed,” I voiced. “I think I have rug burns.”

He lifted his head for the first time since. I saw the blur of his eyes and the thrash of his smile. “Sorry ‘bout that.” 

I smiled back but couldn’t think of anything teasing to say. He pulled me to my feet this time and we found solace in the cloudy bed. Unspoken words sat in the gap between us and I could feel his eyes burn on me as mine began to flutter. “Al.”

He reached over and brushed my hair out of my face. He nuzzled closer to me with a comfortable distance one that caused an ember to shoot through me but not a wildfire. “We’ll talk in the morning.” And that was enough. It always would be.

*

I got up before him. I thought about waking him but that would mean facing things. With my pounding, but sober head, I panicked. I sat somewhere between losing it and jumping up and down. I stole his clothes, went to get a coffee, and sat in the hotel lobby. If he woke up, I wondered if he would have thought I left. I didn’t write a note or anything. Would it have brought him relief or disappointment?

My headache cleared somewhere in my people-watching time and with that, I was allowed to calculate my next move. Quickly I knew I didn’t want to leave. I would be an asshole move and I was trying to be less of an asshole. The communication part was hard. It almost made things feel more normal. Alex and I always struggled to get to the point. Last night it was the same way. We didn’t make sense of things. We only jumbled the Rubik’s cube up more.

When my coffee cup reached half-full, I went back upstairs. He was still asleep and I was left with nothing to do. Boredom was worse than inconveniencing him so I landed on the bed and began to shake until he woke. Asshole move?

“Alright, alright.” He placed his hand on my leg to stop my movement. He kept it there with no other words spoken.

“Hi,” I said.

He smiled. “Hi. Morning. Is that coffee for me?”

My eyes drifted off. “Well…”

He dropped his head on the pillow. It spread out across it in a new way. I was discovering new movements and how he looked different, not just with hair, but he gained new mannerisms and practices. He was teaching me new ways to act. I think part of me always wanted to be him. Being with him was the next closest thing.

His hands covered his face. “My head is killing me.”

“You can have the rest of it if you want.”

He threw the covers off and stood up. I forget he was naked underneath all that. I stared at his ass. I almost reached out to squeeze it but he turned too quickly. “No, I don’t want your slug.”

I giggled. It felt like an old routine. We were still the people we used to be. We had done this a hundred times before. I could do it a hundred times more. For a moment, it felt perfect. I think we only have a few of those, scattered across years and times; a clear view of when everything lines up and makes sense. Perhaps, the circumstances weren’t ideal, but I wasn’t thinking about that anymore. It was a distraction from everything else. I missed laughing with him.

��I can get you some milk,” I offered as he slipped into the bathroom.

*

Over a coffee, one bowl of Cheerios, and one bowl of Corn Flakes, Alex and I talked. Only a few people sat in the hotel’s dining area with us, scattered feet away from us. We slurped our cereal and Alex milked his coffee. It all felt disposable.

“I don’t remember the last time I sat and had breakfast,” I commented while spooning my Cheerios.

“Always rushing off somewhere?”

“I guess. Sitting at a table and eating by yourself feels weird to me. I usually get up too late for breakfast anyway.”

“You were up early this morning.” He sipped his coffee, still pepping himself up.

“Time difference. I’m all turned around.”

He nodded, perfectly aware of the struggle of time zones. “I’ve finally learned how to keep track of days on tour. Day of the week, month, number, everything.”

I smiled at his excitement. He could be so overjoyed about such small things. He paid attention to the small things. He was exceedingly good at spot the difference games because his eye was somehow able to take in all the fine details. 

“When are you going back on tour?” I asked. The answer to our predicament lay in his answer.

“A week or so.”

I laughed in hopes of lightening the load. “Some honeymoon Cookie and Katie will have.”

“We are headed to New Zealand. It’s a beautiful place to go. You know that. Good hiking.”

“You sound like a travel agent.”

He leaned back and gazed at me. “Maybe I am one.”

I broke eye contact with the pain of letting him down. “Nice try.”

Alex nodded. He already knew my answer but held out for a change if maybe this had been one of the things I grew out of. “I’ll take pictures for you.”

“Email them to me,” I requested. “I miss your emails.”

He looked at me and didn’t say anything. He was pulling things apart in his mind. I could see his brain untying knots and straightening the wrinkles. He deciphered, walked down every path, and climbed every tree before he could have the best view of things. “When are we going to talk about…?” He gestured to him and I. Us.

Old habits were there for me to slip back into. It was easy to push away but he offered himself up to me. Him taking the first step alleviated me and the burden didn’t feel so painful to speak honestly. “Whenever you want.”

The ball was in his court and he bounced it a few times, double-checked its firmness, tested his racquet, and hit the ball back to me. “You’re going back to New York. Nothing’s changing that, right?”

“Yeah.”

He nodded along, working through things. His face stayed neutral and didn’t show any explicit reaction. He looked around the room as if the answers were playing hide & seek with him. “We’re touring all summer.”

“I know.”

Those words tapped into him. A smile crept out from the knowledge that I kept up with him, even if it was just the grand scale of his world tour. I didn’t lock him away from my mind. “Well, if you ever want to visit anywhere. I hear Germany’s nice in June.”

I raised an eyebrow. “With all the tourists?”

“You’ll fit right in with them. You can help me out with my German”

I chuckled. “I think your German might be better than mine.”

“Then I can show off.”

I toss my head. “Well, maybe if New York gets too hot. And someone pays for my flight.”

“You’re really milking me here.”

“I’m prostituting myself for you.”

He chuckled before all the humour sunk from his voice. “If you fall in love with some guy before then I’ll be happy for you, Jane. Or if you don’t want to do this—whatever this is—again, I’ll get it.”

It touched me, even though I knew it shouldn’t. I worried this was a pattern I’d repeat my whole life. “If you get a girlfriend I’ll kill you.”

Luckily, he smiled. “I’ll have to fight them off.” Eye roll. “Do whatever you want, Janie.”

I couldn’t look at him. I was too embarrassed that my cheeks were turning red. “I’ll be your Nell Gwynn.”

“Who?”

“Charles II’s mistress.”

He shook his head in laughter. “Only you would know that. Gimme more respect than that. I’m not some imperialistic floozy boinking everyone I see.”

“Boinking?”

*

Alex and I hugged each other goodbye and the next day I was back in New York. I had to attend this Writers in New York event for Gotham Writers where I got to wear a fancy blouse and suit jacket that made me look sexy professor librarian chic and not Hillary Rodham Clinton pantsuit disaster. I met up with a group of my writer friends because I had that now. There were all cool women because male writers are weird and either old or misogynistic or arrogant or all of the above.

I hung out with Maddie a lot. She was a year younger than me and worked as a part-time professor for The New School and spent the rest of the time writing part-time for Vogue Magazine. She was always complaining about how busy she was but she was always at these events. I had the opposite problem of having too much free time, although that was becoming less and less true.

We were smoking cigarettes outside with glasses of scotch and talked about how we wished we had cigars so we could be like those old literary professors we loathed. “All I need is a beer belly and a Viagra addiction and I’ll be lecturing at Columbia in no time,” I quipped. I took a drag like taking a deep breath.

“That’s until you get caught touching a student’s ass,” she joked back.

I waved her off. “I’ll get a cushy suspension package and be back in no time.” I sipped my scotch and was reminded of Alex’s hands around a glass. Maddie only vaguely knew about him and that’s why I felt the freedom to tell her. Opal could be judgy. (I did eventually tell her and she wasn’t surprised. She asked if it was worth it. I said yes. She said good. And that was that. Although, she did start to make plenty of annoying jokes about it but it was worth that too). 

“Are you going to get back together?” Maddie asked with riveting curiosity as if she was reading through Page Six. 

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I weirdly don’t care. The ambiguity of it left a lot of imagining in the air. I don’t know when I’ll even see him again.”

“Do you want to?”

I nodded. “I still love him.”

“Then how can you not get back together with him?” The answer was always simple for me: love had nothing to do with our relationship. I would love Alex forever it would ebb and flow and change but I know we both would have a love for one another that only the two of us could fully understand. It was under lock and key in our minds and it was a shared experience only we would know about. It’s impossible not to love someone who shared that with you. It would not be ripped away from me.

When I got back home that night, Alex sent me an email with pictures of New Zealand. At the end of his length message, he wrote, Let me know if you change your mind. Australia is not too bad either. Or London. We could even grab a pint with Robert if you want though I would object to the threesome. I don’t need anything else making me insecure. Keep me updated and don’t drink too many woo woos. Love, Al.

The possibility of a vacation was wishful thinking. My second book was headed toward release and the summer seemed to fill my schedule up beyond a long flight to Australia that would likely cause me major sleep issues. London was a nice thought but having just been there it wasn’t likely. Moreover, I didn’t want to chase him this time. That’s what stopped me from saying we would get back together.

*

New York was too hot during the summer but I stayed in it. Alex and I talked on the phone occasionally. Conversations were usually mundane in the way I always loved. We were filling each other’s silence. Whenever we would get to the end and try and say goodbye the other thought of a story to tell and we talked for another hour. It was a dance we did. One time he tried to talk about it—whatever we were. I told him, “We’ll talk about it when we see each other again. Did you know the Eiffel Tower grows up to 6 inches in the summer?”

Fennel and Kaka threw a massive dinner party for their anniversary at Lotte New York Palace. I had never been somewhere so stunning in my life and with every move I was worried I’d break something and have to pay for it.

After dinner, I went out to the courtyard for a smoke. When I pulled the pack out of my clutch purse, I saw I had a missed call from Alex. He was in Iowa, back on the road. He answered after two rings. “Hello,” he said all formal and pristine.

“Heyo!” I cheered back. “What’s up?”

His voice was light and he sounded happy. “Nothing really. Wanted to see what you were up to.”

“I’m at Fennel and Kaka’s anniversary party. I told you about it.” We were back to that. We communicated about our days and lives and he no longer felt so far out of reach and with that I didn’t feel so far out of reach to my own self.

“Ah. Right.”

“I’m standing in this fancy hotel’s courtyard in a dress that is way too expensive to be stinking it up with my smoke right now. Fennel gave it to me as a gift for his anniversary ‘cause he’s a whackjob. It’s a 1997 Dolce & Gabbana sheer black lace gown thing and I know that doesn’t mean much to you but that’s expensive.” It was the perfect dress. I had never felt more tailored to a T. It’ll be a dress I give to my children because it deserves to stay in the family. Maybe I’ll be buried in it.

My hand moved down the lace just admiring it on my own body. He cleared his throat. “It means something to me.” I could hear the hunger in his voice.

I rolled my eyes. “Right. I forgot you’re André Leon Talley.”

He hummed. He had no clue who that was. “You should send me a picture so I know what it looks like.” He always struggled with subtlety in the seduction department. He didn’t even have a face that fell a certain way to hide behind. 

“Alex, you’re not clever.”

“What?” He tried to act like he had no clue of his words or his tone that overflowed with lust. His voice naturally came off erotic after the effects of cigarettes, singing, and if you’re a person like me with a predisposition to a Northern English accent. “I want to see the Dolce & Gabbana. If you love it so much.”

“I never said I loved it.”

“Janie.” 

I gave in because he was cute and horny. “I’ll send you the photo I took before I left. You gonna jack off to it?” I quipped. This was my version of flirting. 

He snorted. “You’re so romantic, Janie.” (He didn’t deny it). “I’ll save you the trouble if you just want to have phone sex here.”

“You’re not funny,” I said back. “In fact, you’re a creep.”

“You’re horny.”

“Oh, my god. Ew, you’re disgusting.”

“No, you totally are. You only get freaked out by this stuff when you are. You turn into a massive prude when you’re turned on. Are you wet?”

“I’m gonna hang up,” I threatened. 

He was laughing at me. “You’re totally gonna go into the bathroom and jerk off right now.”

“Bye, Alex. Have a nice time with your penis.”

I sent him the photo and refused to give into the idea he had of me and whatever his sick perverted fantasy he projected on to me. (I did it when I got home).

*

Alex visited me the last week of September. Fall had allegedly begun but summer weather remained to haunt. He decided to spend part of his tour break in New York claiming it would be cooler than LA but it was in fact hotter. Besides, if he wanted cooler weather he should’ve just gone back to Britannia.

He came in around dinner time, taking the subway to my apartment. He buzzed up and I met him at the top of the stairs because I didn’t want to help carry his belongings. After he dropped off his things and refreshed himself, we got dinner at Gage & Tollner, which was fancy but you could get away with wearing jeans. He made fun of me for getting oysters and we split a Baked Alaska for dessert because I had never had one before.

We went back to my apartment and watched Halloween H20: Halloween 20 Years Later, which made us feel stoned even though we never lit up. Alex was particularly fond of LL Cool J’s role. The movie has since become a staple around Halloween time.

I began flipping through channels after the movie had finished not wanting to watch whatever Superman movie followed it. It was nearing 11 PM and the options were limited to The 700 Club or some late night talk show.

I flicked away and Alex leaned over and kissed me. I was taken away by that programming. We slept together. I think that was inevitable. It was unavoidable no matter how much at dinner we joked and skirted around what had happened at the wedding. We waited until the night hours when the sun didn’t shine the truth on us.

In the morning, we fell into an old routine. I wore his boxers and one of my ratty white Hanes tank tops and he didn’t even bother to put on a shirt as we ate breakfast. We even did the crossword together. 

We dressed for the day—I, in a skirt and some spaghetti strapped top, him, in jeans and a dark tee, unrespectful for the balance of the seasons. I was already sweating by the time we stepped outside. He was fine somehow, something I’ll never understand.

I grabbed an iced coffee from the corner cafe and we took the subway up to Central Park, walking from the south of it to the northern edge. “I never come here,” I told him. “It’s too long of a ride.” I didn’t mention that it reminded me of him. It felt stupid for a landscape so large and iconic to forever be tainted by one person that you’d avoid said landmark. Well, it was also a 40-minute subway ride away and Brooklyn had parks of its own but Al still liked to go to Central Park.

“I loved going here,” he said. “I would come up here while you were at work and go somewhere new every time but always ended up watching someone play baseball.”

I laughed. “You’re gonna end up coaching one of these days.”

“Like Little League or something?” He questioned.

I didn’t answer questions about little children and Alex being the coach of some kid’s baseball team. Not just some kid but his kid. “Why’d you never tell me that?” I knew about his love for Central Park but these excursions were mysterious. It would be a simple shrug on how his day went and he would say he went to Central Park and then that was all. I never asked what he did there either. I was less interested in other people in those days.

He thought about it as we climbed up the makeshift stairs for a hill. He scratched his cheek with his mouth in an open circle. Chewed up whatever he was thinking in his mouth. He landed on, “I don’t know.” He chewed some more. “It felt more special that way. It was something just for me, you know? We did so much together that…I don’t know.”

The way he put it made secrets feel like a sweet thing. The omission of things is actually a treat and was something for me to be endeared by now. Suddenly, every other thing he kept from me, those nights were he sat far away from me and smoked outside with a closed notebook, they were all delights for him and not things I pondered about until I fell asleep.

“Did you feel a need to keep things from me?” I blamed myself. Even in that moment, I knew it was stupid to feel that way. 

“No.” He thought about it a little. He moved his face, twisted it up in a way that I knew he didn’t fully believe that. “Not intentionally.”

We were descending the hill when I asked, “What’s that mean?” I was lighthearted about it. I had the attitude that what was done was done and it had been done so long ago that it almost felt like another life. I had a dull edge to it.

“Young and a natural inclination to be taciturn. It wasn’t even that big of a deal. I just walked around but I think I didn’t have a lot of things that were my own here. You had a whole life here that I wasn’t apart of.”

I almost told him that wasn’t true but I could already picture the look he would give me and I would agree that it was probably true. I acclimated much quicker to New York with a job and friends. I don’t think Alex ever fully adjusted. “I always worried about what you were keeping from me and I’m realizing now that it was probably just a bunch of your typical dorky shit.”

“Oh, thanks, Jane,” he chuckled. “I didn’t mean to come off that way. Truthfully, I just didn’t have a lot going on in the first place.”

“You were bored here.” It never occurred to me that Alex could feel the same as me. Call it being in your twenties and raised with selfish role models. I’m still undoing the whole world revolving around me thing. I am writing a book about myself so…there’s that.

He tossed his head from side to side. “I wouldn’t say bored. Not by New York. I think I was bored of myself.”

“Are you still?” He was the most fascinating person to me I couldn’t imagine the idea of being bored or tired of him. He saved me from boredom endless times. Just the idea of him, daydreaming, fantasizing, lamenting over him. I did it all.

“Sometimes. Not as much as before. Kinda too busy to deal with that.”

I nodded and sipped the last of my iced coffee before tossing it. “A rare benefit of no free time. I’m no longer so concerned with myself because I don’t have time to be. Only in the mirror in the morning really.”

“When you give yourself pep talks?”

I jabbed him with my elbow. “I did that one time. Maybe if you gave me a pep talk before that job interview I wouldn’t have had to do it myself.” He was still laughing at the memory.

We stood on the top of Bow Bridge and watched as people sat on the lake in their rowboats. “You wanna do that?”

I scoffed. “No, rowing hurts my arms.”

He gave me a taunting grin. “Weak.”

We walked up to The Met. They had an exhibit called Early American Guitars that piqued Alex’s interest but they didn’t have that many so we ended up going to the In Miniature exhibit that piqued my interest because I like tiny things. We roamed the halls of it until we got too hungry we had to leave for lunch.

I wanted to go to Lexington Candy Shoppe but Alex insisted he was so hungry he couldn’t walk the three blocks to get there. So, we bought hot dogs and sat on the steps of The Met. “I can’t remember the last time I had a hot dog,” I said.

He was chewing and trying his best to not have his toppings fall on his clothes as he said, “Neither can I.”

“I thought I would hate it but I kind of like it which is totally disgusting because this hot dog has probably been sitting in his cart for like years because you know they buy these in bulk for sure and then they are sitting out there all day until we order them and then they are thrown in this dirty water that they never clean but it’s still good. In fact, it’s probably the best hot dog I’ve ever had and it’s disgusting. I’ll be burping hot dog all day but it’s worth it, I think. I was starved and this feels like my death row meal.”

He listened, nodded, and said, “What would you be on death row for?” Because that’s the kind of person Alex is. He listened to that whole rant about hot dogs and appreciated it. I think he might have some sanity issues because I don’t really know how a person can put up with my level of talking and enjoy it. He claims to.

“Stealing hot dogs or something. I don’t know. Or a hot dog cart license. Do you know how much money they make? I read an article that hot dog stands make over $100,000 per year but a license, especially in a place outside The Met or Central Park is so expensive that not your average Joe can do it. Maybe you should invest in something like that.”

“Wouldn’t I then have to run the actual hot dog stand?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe you can hire a guy to do it for you. Because it’s never women is it? Have you ever seen a woman run a hot dog stand?”

“Do you want to work at a hot dog stand?”

“No. Maybe only men are gross enough to deal with that dirt water boiling thing. I think we need to break the gender barrier on that.”

“This sounds like a great piece for The New York Times. Front page news.”

I laughed with him. “Don’t mock me. I’m serious.”

“I know. Truly I’m entranced by you talking about hot dogs. I don’t think any other person can do that. I think you should write a piece about it.”

“I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not.”

“Kind of. Then again, I think you could write a piece about anything.”

*

Saturday night I had plans to go out. It was the standing day of the week and counted as my job falling somewhere in the category of “networking.” I told Alex that he could come along or spend the night in at my place or get up to whatever secret shit he wanted to.

He strangely enthusiastically said, “No, I’ll join ya!” 

The Good Room (horrible name for a club) had opened that year and it felt like everybody who lived in Brooklyn went there, at least everyone I knew. It was loud and seizure-inducing but still probably the best club in Brooklyn. Not that I really go clubbing anymore.

Drinks were heavy and it was the kind of place where you felt like the night would never end, the music would keep going and the party would never die down. Alex met some of my friends. They shouted their names at each other and shared the experience of dancing in the middle of a booming bass speaker. It didn’t make for good conversation but it was a nice bonding experience.

We were there until the night became morning but not as late as most of my friends stayed. Alex was leaving the next day and even though the flight wasn’t until the afternoon he still wanted a good night’s sleep (and time to do other stuff). 

Before we left we had a smoke outside because tradition is tradition and few things in life are as good as being sort of drunk, dark outside, and Alex standing beside me. It also left time for it to feel like the world was cracking open in front of my eyes and daunting truths that I didn’t want to let slip from my lips now felt powerless to stop them from coming out of my mouth. “We should probably talk about it now. Before you go.”

He nodded but didn’t talk.

“This is a bit of an endless cycle,” I said. “You and me and maybe—”

He interrupted. “Let’s talk about it later.” He wouldn’t look me in the eye. The ground was much more interesting. “After the tour.”

“Okay,” I muttered. Anything not bite-sized felt impossible.

We left it at that. The routine didn’t change but everything was tinted differently. A sense of goodbye haunted the area. We were numbed by alcohol. In the morning, we hugged goodbye tightly like we were two old pals. As if we were in a timeline where all we ever were to each other was friends.

Photos were taken of us outside the nightclub and it made me laugh. I have a sense of humour about these things that might be misplaced but Alex and I joked about it as if we’d be cutting it out and placing it in our scrapbook. Like the conversation being photographed wasn’t some awkward jolted painful thing. Like we weren’t some awkward jolted painful thing. 

*

History Lesson was released on the first day of November. It was less eventful than my first book. I suppose the second time around isn’t as exciting. You’ve already conquered the mountaintop and after people aren’t as shocked you did it a second time. Or maybe it is more shocking? If you do it well I guess, which was kind of the consensus for that collection of stories. It sticks out like a sore thumb and maybe my lack of enthusiasm was because I wasn’t super satisfied with how it turned out.

Still, I did a book tour for it, which was fine. I’m still not a fan of tours. I like home. Whatever or whoever that is at the time.

It was the last one I ever did and with reason because I don’t really see why authors have to tour and scattered signings around major cities are fine with me. I went to Syracuse on this tour. Syracuse is not fun in winter.

But I ended up in LA. For Alex and me, this was the benefit of touring.

He came to the event. I think I hated that most of all about the book tour. He showed up before it began and we grabbed a coffee at this place on the corner because I hate Starbucks (I wish it was in the social justice way but no they just always mess up my order). He joked about showing up at the table to get his book signed and I said if he did that I’d skin him alive.

Luckily, he didn’t. We talked about the book briefly, mostly him just being nice about it, things that weren’t true despite his continued claim that they were even after I told him to shut up about it. We walked back to the bookstore and I refused him being in the audience of chairs so he walked around and stood out of my view. He said he wouldn’t listen in but I know he did.

On the drive back to his place, he wouldn’t stop talking about how eloquently I had spoken. I think he got a kick out of the way I told him to stop and would duck my head to the side so he couldn’t see I was blushing.

“And you always said you were a horrible public speaker but you’re a fucking good one,” he enthused.

We were stuck in LA traffic. “I think you’re gonna need your eyes checked, Al. I said ‘um’ about a million times and stuttered while reading my own words.”

He shook his head. “You’ve heard me speak and you think you’re bad at talking.”

“You know, we can both be bad at something. It’s not a competition.”

He chuckled tightly, almost embarrassed by it, covering his mouth as it rippled out. “Oh, my god. You of all people are saying it’s not a competition.”

I squashed my laugh the best I could. “Fair enough. But I think we both lose either way.”

*

He made me dinner. I couldn’t remember the last time I had a home-cooked meal. One that was sloppy and that he forgot to bring out a fork for me and he oversalted it but I didn’t say anything. It was too lovely to ruin with my criticism.

“I would love to learn how to cook but there’s barely any space in my apartment so if a fire starts the whole place would burn down right away,” I told him over a glass of wine.

“As long as you can boil water, I think you’re fine,” he assured me. “You could come out here and practice.”

I furrowed my brows. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve got a lot of space in my kitchen. If you ever wanted to try or something.”

I didn’t engage with his suggestion. I wanted to enjoy my stay and whatever this was. My response to it, a rejection of LA and moving out here again for him, would ruin that bliss. I changed the subject and everything else went along smoothly.

My stay was supposed to be for a week. As the week moved further along, Alex dropped words about how warm LA was compared to the bitter cold New York had become. Again, I didn’t engage with it. We enjoyed our time hiking, movies, drinking, and having sex.

We didn’t kiss outside the area of sex. If one of us kissed the other it was a clear message of “Hey, I’d like to fuck you now.” We both had free schedules and a large house to ourselves so it was easy to engage in this behaviour. 

One evening, while I was giving him head a pain shot through my mouth. I pulled back instantly clutching my cheek. “What?” He asked. ��What’s wrong?”

I shook my head not able to talk with the pain in my mouth.

“Are you okay?”

I shook my head again.

“Okay. Okay. What can I do?” His concern was unimaginably sweet but I couldn’t help my amusement of his hard dick standing there while I winced. “Medicine?”

I shrugged but after I opened my mouth an inch and excruciating pain rippled through my whole body I quickly nodded. 

Alex ran off to fetch some. I sat trying to dissect the pain. I felt around my mouth with my tongue and the pain just increased more. He returned to the sight of my body curled up on my side and my face scrunched up barely able to look at him.

He held my back to help me sit up. I struggled to open my mouth to take the pills. After I swallowed, he asked, “What hurts? Did you break something?”

I managed to mumble. “Mouth. Teeth.”

“Did you break a tooth?”

I shook my head.

“You still have your wisdom teeth, right?”

I nodded and pointed a finger, emphasizing that this was definitely that.

“I don’t think you’re supposed to be in this much pain.”

“I’m fine,” I muttered. “Sleep make better.” I started to spread out on his bed.

“I think you should be able to talk more than Frankenstein’s monster.”

It made me laugh, which only hurt me more. It took me a while to fall asleep. He stayed up until I did.

*

My teeth were infected. Not only infected but impacted. They were laid on their side, unable to fully erupt, stuck in my gums, infecting them, and now my mouth. Of course, they had erupted just enough to begin slicing the side of my cheeks.

It was determined through the emergency dentist, Alex, and myself that I would not be going back to New York with my wisdom teeth. I couldn’t imagine going through airport security with that level of pain, I could barely make the car ride to the dentist.

On the ride back from the consultation where it was determined that I would need to get them removed as soon as possible but still had to wait until they had an opening, Alex joked, “Do you think my cum infected it?”

It was so gross and disgusting and made me laugh so hard that I forgot about the pain for a moment until it shot through me again. As I winced, he took one hand off the wheel and placed it on my shoulder, squeezing it and rubbing my upper back for the remainder of the car ride. I wanted to kiss him, kiss the hand that was the only comfort I had, but it hurt too much.

After I got them removed, drugged up, and gauze stuffed in my mouth to stop the bleeding, I talked in muffled words as the dentist told Alex the aftercare instructions. I felt warm all over him watching him listen intently to the dentist but also stare at me and my messed up swollen face. He made faces at me to make me feel a little better like I was a baby he was playing peek-a-boo with. I don’t remember anything I said but Alex said I was emotional and very funny. So, not much different than my regular disposition.

The hazy effect of the drugs began to ease up on the car ride home where I was able to at least follow what was going on around me. “I love drugs. Modern medicine is great.”

“Yeah, you’d probably be dead from the infection otherwise.”

I stared at Alex. “Wow, thanks. That’s really comforting.”

“Well, you’re not dead.”

“Thanks, Al. I didn’t realize.” I laughed. I don’t know if I found it funny or the drugs found it funny. “I would’ve had to have you use pilers to get them out.”

He grimaced before shaking off the thought. “Well, all of your wisdoms gone. What are you going to do now?”

I rolled my eyes. “Very funny, dad.”

*

In the days of recovering, we camped out on the couch. We talked occasionally but that was tough for me in the first few days. Alex did a good job of taking care of me. Better than I would have done that’s for sure. He made food and searched high and low for these freezy pops I like that had a tough time being located in winter.

As I began to get better and actually function independently with manageable pain, the question of when I would leave was raised. The unanswerable idea of what we were doing remained until the swelling in my mouth went down and I told him, “We should probably talk about it before I leave. You know, boundaries and rules.”

He smirked. “You’re very proper.”

I shamed him for making me laugh. It was always his greatest tool in distracting me. “I’m serious.”

“Shall we write up a contract?”

I rolled my eyes. “Alex.”

“Jane,” he sighed. He leaned against the back of the couch, placing his head on his fist. He looked too relaxed for my liking. I was mulling things over, stuck in distress and he looked fine as ever. “You’re going back to New York. I’m staying here.”

“So, we should…end it.”

“Is that what you want?” He was wide-eyed like he either didn’t want to believe me or didn’t believe me at all.

I almost lied. It would have been easier. It would heal the wound and not leave things festering to be hurt more. It would be closure but that would have been boring. “No.”

His mouth ticked up. “There it is then.”

I raised an eyebrow, still completely lost on our status. “Are you my boyfriend again?”

“Do you want me to be?”

I threw my hands up in the air. I pulled my hair into a bun feeling too heated to have it down. “Why do I have to make all the decisions?”

“Everyone knows you wear the pants in the relationship, Janie.”

“Sexist,” I quipped.

He smiled all-knowingly like he had a premonition of how this was all going to turn out and he was just waiting for me to realize it. “Do you want me to make the decision?”

I shrugged. I liked having my way but I no longer wanted to drag the person along with me, kicking and screaming. “I’d like your input. I care what you think.”

“I think you’ll go back to New York and I’ll stay here and in the next couple of months maybe I’ll visit and maybe you’ll visit or we meet somewhere. I could be your boyfriend then. If you wanted.”

“Like during those visits?”

“Yeah, and if during those times when you’re alone in New York if you want to go out with some other guy then that’s fine with me.” He was very matter-of-fact. Not one ounce of jealousy poured out of him and I realized that it no longer bugged me. It kind of turned me on more than a jealous Alex ever did. He trusted me. Go figure, that’s actually a good thing.

I smirked at him, inching closer. “Is this just your rule so you can bang a bunch of hot girls?”

“No,” he chuckled, “if I wanted to bang hot girls I wouldn’t be driving you to the airport tomorrow.”

I blushed because he was saying things like that and looking at me like that and I wasn’t sure how I was going to be able to get on a plane tomorrow when I wanted to be doing just that. 

“And if at some point New York gets boring or too cold or if LA burns down or people talk about their cold-pressed juices too much then maybe we’ll end up somewhere together.”

The idea felt mature and practically and maybe a little flawed but it felt like a Sex & the City adult relationship. We both knew what we could give the other and this time expectations were set to prevent disappointment.

He kissed me for the first time since the surgery. We didn’t have sex after. He just wanted to kiss me to kiss me. 

*

a/n: i hope this isn't too alexa chung coded. anyway, i'm very proud of this chapter. maybe just because i wrote so much. so i hope you like it. happy v day.

[justtakeout]

The Big Bang Continuum EP 2: The Coefficient of Chaos in Child-Rearing

Sheldon faces a parenting dilemma when Leonard’s hockey game clashes with Laura's newfound passion for acting, a hobby he blames on Penny. As the gang gathers at the ice rink, Sheldon tries to maintain his scientific approach, but family dynamics quickly challenge his methods. 

hi guys, this is ep2 of the tbbt webtoon! had to split what was originally ep2 into two separate episodes because of the upload limit. the next chapter will be the last one, and it'll probably take a while too since i haven’t even started it yet hahaha. hope you guys enjoy this one as much as i enjoyed making it, and i’d love to hear what you think! you can check it out here: Read The Big Bang Continuum :: The Coefficient of Chaos in Child-Rearing (Part 1) | Tapas Community Read The Big Bang Continuum :: The Coefficient of Chaos in Child-Rearing (Part 2) | Tapas Community

leonard cooper’s jersey number was supposed to be #12, but i messed up in ep1 and didn’t notice the typo until later. decided to roll with #14 instead to match his age, figured it worked out in the end.

apparently, “silver fox” means an attractive older man, which i had no idea about hhahaha. i was just throwing around team names with foxes, monkeys, and koalas. too late to change it now since the jerseys and logos are already done, and honestly, i’m too lazy to redo it t_t.

i don’t have a background in hockey or webtoons, so i pulled a lot of inspiration from dogshred (https://www.manhwatoon.com/manga/dogsred/) after seeing it recommended on reddit. mostly used it to figure out how to panel the game flow and sfx. no idea if what i did is accurate, i just went with what felt right, lol. if you’re into hockey manga, i’d say check it out, though i haven’t finished reading it yet.

for the gameplay, leonard cooper was loosely inspired by connor bedard (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxFUWS5MBOc&list=WL&index=3&pp=gAQBiAQB), but the script’s game play is a mix of:

Little Caesars VS #2 Chicago Mission 15s | Game Highlights 2019 MAHA Bantam Major State Championship - HoneyBaked vs Little Caesars Bauer Bantam Elite Invite Finals - West Van vs Delta - Extended Game HighlightsAAA Bantam Day 3 Championship (Full game, no commentary)

asked a coworker for advice on the game and terminology, but yeah i don’t really know hockey hahaha used a ton of references while drawing the scenes.

also cut a lot of scenes from the original script since it felt like it was dragging the pace haha big thanks to angel @girlnamedangel for beta reading and giving super helpful feedback!

if you notice any differences in details, it’s probably because i drew some stuff from memory while at work lol. let me know if you spot any typos or mistakes so i can avoid them next time hahaha.

[danandphil-lies]

DESPICABLE LIES INCOMING!

hello everyone. the merriam-webster dictionary defines "game" as "a physical or mental competition conducted according to rules with the participants in direct opposition to each other" [1]. notice that it's a competition with rules and participants are against each other. naturally, if one were to see a "gaming" channel, one would assume that games were played on said channel, no?

AND YET! the youtube channel "DanAndPhilGAMES" misleads and manipulates its audience with false advertising. as if the name itself isn't enough, the channel has been referred to as a "gaming channel" by its creators [2, 3]:

so, surely it is not the fault of the audience if they assume that this channel involves playing games. however, let's take a look at their previous four videos:

is reacting to so-called phan twitter a game? is forcing someone to watch tiktoks a game?? MUST I BRING UP TURNING SOMEBODY INTO A PIG??? it's plain to see that DanAndPhilGAMES hardly includes gaming at all. however, at this point, it should be no surprise that daniel howell and phil lester love lying.

untruthfulness is their drug and they've been high since 2009.

even their video titles themselves contain lies! in the video "Saying Goodbye Forever," (which, again, is not a game), DanAndPhil announce that, in fact, they are not saying goodbye, but rather bringing the channel back [4]! their deceitfulness has gone on for far too long. now more than ever, we must rise up against the youtube duo known as "phan." we must demand justice! NO MORE LIES! NO MORE LIES!

Works Cited

“Game.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/game. Accessed 5 Jun. 2024.

Daniel Howell [@danielhowell]. "it's official. we have a joint gaming channel - DanAndPhilGAMES! here's our first video: https://youtube.com/watch?v=sVMN-BUlmx8&list=UUuhwvTYFvVZjyBVXc9T7CrA… MONKEYING AROUND 👦🎮🙇 pls RT." Twitter, 12 Sep. 2014, 9:16 p.m. https://x.com/danielhowell/status/510522413797629952.

Phil Lester [@AmazingPhil]. "So happy you guys like the gaming channel :o 💙 100,000 subscribers already?! come join us! http://youtube.com/subscription_center?add_user=DanAndPhilGAMES." Twitter, 13 Sep. 2014, 12:18 a.m. https://x.com/AmazingPhil/status/510568145808261121.

“Saying Goodbye Forever.” YouTube, uploaded by DanAndPhilGAMES, 15 Oct. 2023, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYO30KpiVEo.

special shoutout to our comrade @tt04sty who submitted a post on this topic. the news of their lies is spreading... i will not stop until ALL phannies understand that their youtube "dads" insult us every day with an onslaught of fabrications

[reality-detective]

Questions To Ask Ourselves:

1. What is an Egyptian pyramid doing on a US dollar bill?

2. Why did 56 countries sign a treaty not to take risks and enter Antarctica?

3. Why do planes never fly over Antarctica?

4. How did NASA "lose" the photos of the moon landing, one of the most important moments for humanity?

5. If Neil Armstrong was the first to walk on the moon, who held the camera?

6. Why haven't we gone back to the moon?

7. If monkeys evolved into humans, why are there still monkeys?

8. Why does 95% of our DNA exist as "junk"? Who decided it was actually "garbage"?

9. How were huge, symmetrical, detailed, sacred, and geometrically regular structures such as cathedrals and parliamentary buildings created by people who lived in log cabins, rode horse-drawn carriages, and had no machines or lasers?

10. How is it that similar pre-Columbian architecture is found all over the world?

11. Why are there images in ancient Egyptian art that resemble "spaceships"?

12. Why were remains and images of giant people found? And why do different ancient scriptures from various cultures, including the Bible, talk about giants?

13. Why are there images of mushrooms in ancient Christian art? And why does the Pope dress up like a giant Amanita muscaria mushroom?

14. Why do ancient Egyptian artworks show jaws, and is it a coincidence that the pineal gland resembles jaws?

15. Why are there descriptions of dragons all over the world and in different cultures, thousands of years apart, and also mentioned in the Bible?

16. Why is there so much blatant satanic symbolism in the music and entertainment industry?

17. Why do most video games revolve around killing?

18. How is it possible that movies and cartoons like The Simpsons can predict certain cultural events so accurately?

19. How do forest fires melt cars but leave trees intact?

20. What is the national debt? If there is a borrower, there must also be a lender: who is it?

21. How is it that the so-called "national debt" has increased despite tax increases? Where does the taxpayer's money go?

22. Why is alcohol and tobacco poisoning considered "normal" and referred to simply as "drinking" and "smoking"?

23. Why are alcohol and tobacco shown in almost all shows and movies?

24. How do news presenters around the world and on various channels say and repeat the same script word for word?

25. If we are more progressive and informed than ever before, why do we have the highest rates of obesity, cancer, and heart disease, not to mention depression?

Questions you should have already been asking yourself and there are many more you should be asking. 🤔

[letstalkaboutfandomsbaby]

I just found your account, and I love your writing especially the ones with Geto!! (I love that man!!)I do apologize for asking but do think you would ever write more of chubby reader Geto? Especially the one where chubby darling is trying to make herself useful in his temple? I love that one especially!

I actually wanted to write a fic for that prompt for a LONG time but i never found the strength to finish it, so allow me to expand upon chubby reader who works in Geto's temple 💕

CW: chubby fem reader, non-sorcerer reader, Geto refers to reader as a "monkey" once, allusion to suicide, bullying, the twins are around 10-12 yrs old, smut (mostly implied)

───────────────

Let's start by saying that you're nothing special. You are not the type of girl that Geto would see himself with. It would take a miracle for him to fall for someone like you.

And yet, miracles happen every day, don't they?

Your family has acquired some debt. They have been paying Geto to exorcise curses for them, and he has always delivered, but they have run low on funds and there's still a nasty curse to take care of. They beg and plead with him to remove it, but he refuses to lift a finger until they bring him a hefty donation again.

That's where you come in.

You can't see or sense curses, but you've felt their effects, dealing with the repurcussions of your family's awful attitude. This latest curse is the worst of them all, feeding off of every negative thing your family spews, weighing you down with their toxic energy. You'd do anything to get rid of it, to finally know peace again.

So you offer a trade. You promise to provide your services to the sorceror if he exorcises this curse for you and your family.

Geto ponders this deal for a while. He believes that monkeys are only good for providing curses or money, so he doesn't see the appeal of you at first. But then he remembers that he recently disposed of his maid because the twins disliked her, so he decides to make the deal. He will dispose of the curse if you act as his maid, cooking, cleaning, the works.

You have no other choice, so you accept.

The work itself isn't hard. Dusting, sweeping, mopping, polishing. You cook breakfast and dinner, lunch if requested. You're starting to get callouses from the work, but that's the least of your worries.

The twins hate you. You don't expect them to like a non-sorcerer like you, but they're cruel without reason. They tip over your mop bucket and run off laughing, they leave worms in your bed, they once took scissors to your hair and cut a piece off. They are awful, but you know you can't fight back. You have to take the high road, be the bigger person, endure their hatred so you can get by. If you step out of line, Geto will kill you without hesitation, you know this for a fact. So, you don't fight back. You show no reaction. You pray they get bored of you before you jump off the roof of the temple. At least then you would find peace.

The girls get into a fight one day. Nanako ripped Mimiko's doll as payback and now the both of them are sobbing and yelling at each other. You think it's karma for how they've treated you.

And yet, you take the high road once more.

You separate the girls first, sending Mimi to the kitchen and Nana to the living room. You quietly sew and mend Mimiko's doll, eyes watching you as you did so. Once the doll was fixed, you coaxed Nanako to take the doll to her sister and apologize. Surprisingly, she did so, and the girls hugged. They went on their merry way, not hurling insults at you for once. You go back to your chores.

The girls ask, no, demand lunch a few days later. You comply, making onigiri and cutting fruit into fun shapes, adding a cookie for dessert. The girls coo about the hearts and stars on their plates before digging in. They take their plates to the sink when they're finished and linger for a moment, staring at you. You ask what's wrong, but they scamper off before you can get an answer. You wash the dishes in silence.

Nanako falls and scrapes her knee on a rock. The other workers are shocked still, terrified of what Geto will do now that one of his precious girls has been injured, but you don't fret. You take action, bringing the young girl inside, grabbing a first aid kit, tending to her small wound. You clean it, apply a bandage. She requests a kiss to make it better, so you comply, pressing your lips gently against the bandage. She seems satisfied, getting up and running off with her sister again, throwing back a "thank you" as she does. You're surprised at her gratitude, but you think little of it.

You become a beacon of sorts. The other workers saw how well you handled Nanako's wound, and now they come to you whenever they don't know how to handle the twins. The girls are fighting? You are retrieved to break it up. They want lunch? You're always the one who makes it. They're getting ready for bed? You are now the one who ensures they brush their teeth, tucking them into bed before Geto bids them goodnight. You don't think much of your new role, chalking it up to just being a new part of your job that you have to take care of.

It's not until they call you "Mom" that you look at your role differently.

Mimiko calls you "Mom" first, after she finishes her lunch and puts her plate in the sink.

"Mom, I want a cookie."

You pause, frozen, processing what she said.

"Um... what do you say when you want something?" The young girl rolls her eyes.

"May I please have a cookie?" You smile softly at her compliance.

"Yes, you may." You take down the cookie jar, pulling out two and handing them to Mimiko. "Take one to your sister."

"Okay!" And she's off, leaving you to think about your new label.

Later that night, when you're tucking the girls into bed...

"Goodnight, Mom," Mimiko mumbles from below her sheets. You pause at the door, hand on the handle.

"Night, Mom," Nanako speaks up, hiding her face with her comforter. You swallow, inhaling deep.

"Goodnight, girls. Sleep tight."

You hesitantly close the door, hearing it click softly. You sigh, turning around, running into someone.

It was Geto. He stared down at you silently, eyes boring into you. You quickly bowed, moving out of his way, gaze glued to the floor. He watches you for a moment before grabbing the door handle, pushing the door open. You hear the girls chirp with delight as the door closes. Once it clicks shut, you bolt out of there, not looking back.

You become a maternal figure for the girls, someone they look up to, someone they rely on. You take care of them daily, tending to their every whim, scolding them gently when needed. The girls begin to follow you, insisting that you play with them, that you give them time and attention. Other people start taking on your chores so that you can entertain the twins and keep the peace.

At the same time, Geto starts to notice you more.

He notices how the girls light up when they talk about you, how they ask for you at night to read another chapter in their book, how they cling to you whenever they have a free moment. He thinks it's silly for them to enjoy the presence of a non-sorcerer such as yourself. Of all the people to become attached to, why you? There were plenty of socerer women that wandered these halls, so why did they choose you? What was so special about you?

It bothers him for a bit, but ultimately he's just happy that his girls are happy. He even began to appreciate your presence, your maternal instincts allowing you to care for the twins better than anyone else could. He came to value having you around to give his girls the love and attention they lacked when they were so young.

But there were other perks to having you around. Geto found himself delighted whenever you smiled, silently hoping you could direct that smile towards him. He began speaking with you casually, enjoying the sound of your voice more and more with each conversation. And you were attractive, to say the least, bright and lovely. He savoured being able to see a pretty thing like you so often, your round cheeks, your glittering eyes, your delicate hands, your bountiful hips. His mind began to wander to your body during his little meetings, wondering how soft you were under that cheap, coarse uniform. He imagined how your thighs would squish as you sat or kneeled before him, gazing up at him, willing to take whatever he would give you.

That's when he started fantasizing about you in earnest. He started thinking about you late at night, about your plump frame and how it would feel under his fingers. He thought about your thighs warming the sides of his face, your ass bouncing as he thrust into your, your mouth forming a perfect 'O' as you came over and over again. He thought of all of this as his hand trailed down his body, wrapping around his cock and tugging it, groaning at the sensation. You'd be so much better than his hand, soft and warm and wet. He wanted to feel you, to brace you against him, make you all his. God, what he'd give for just a taste of you.

He does this for a while. He doesn't know how much longer he can go. Maybe he'll make you his personal maid, have you draw him a bath, make you massage his scalp as he soaks. Maybe he'll be forward and tell you exactly what he wants. Maybe he'll force you into his bed; people will do anything if they're threatened properly. Maybe he'll woo you with gifts, perhaps a few dresses, maybe even a kimono, something traditional to match him. He's not sure, there's so many options, he can't decide.

The girls want to go to an aquarium. They want you to come along.

Maybe he could court you properly.

───────────────

[bitterkarella]

Identifying furries by their fursonas

Fox- this is the default fursona for the default furry, namely a twink with a blown out fucked to death asshole

Vixen- Girl fox referred to as a vixen is an egg, girl fox just referred to as a fox is an out trans woman

Kistune - the same as above but weeb flavor

he-wolf - a greasy guy who weighs 12 pounds soaking wet and wears a fedora. republican.

she-wolf - the butchest bull dyke you ever saw

coyote - manic depressive. always on something. the drug connection at any furry party

Cat- always a woman

black cat - could be any gender but always goth

kitten/kitty - a trans sex worker, has an only fans they really want you to know about.

bobcat - older dude. wants people to think he's ex-military

Jaguar - an older black guy. will probably have the word "black" in his fursona's name

lion - just a huge asshole

tiger - another asshole. old. wants you to believe he's ex military or ex-police, probably a member of the dorsai irregulars. major grill dad vibes

jackal - a huge asshole and a slut. white gay racist, probably transphobic

cougar - either a trans woman or a terf. there's no in between

Horse - white woman who identifies as 2 Spirit or a guy who wants to be stomped on

Pony - gay nazi

unicorn - either the absolute gayest dude you can be or a 9 year old girl. sometimes a late in life transition

Tanuki - latino

badger - either a huge lesbian or an old avuncular straight guy. possible sex pest

Raccoon - nature's greatest mistake. too normie to be furry, too furry to be normie. dilf.

bat - either a goth or a real annoying shit (some overlap). invader zim fanboy. doesn't drink alcohol but claims to act crazy on "sugar highs." definitely has dabbled in webcomics

cow - a woman. maternal. mom friend or mommy dom. milf. possibly trans femme

steer - a big strong fat rough trade gay guy

sheep - mom vibes

pretty much any farm animal - mom vibes

domestic pig - wild card. might be a wet and messy fetish thing tho or a trash eating thing. loves to be stinky. loves to talk about being stinky.

wild pig - trans masc

skunk - either a fat beardy guy who has a tumblr blog about animation squash & stretch or a stoner gal. very straight. the straightest. a kinsey 0. has strong feelings about what the fandom used to be like before there were all these kids in it.

rat - is a huge asshole as a front, probably likes talking cigars

lemur - autistic

sloth - 420 blaze it. will never finish any commissions

chakat - an older cishet man who thinks the fandom is too political & refers to "anime" as "japanimation"

sergel - nazi

citra - the biggest dipshit you've ever met

procyon - furry equivalent of the thomas jefferson miku binder pic. you should not be talking to this person, this is a literal child

weasel - a girl with cluster b personality disorders

ferret - a person who has at least one pet ferret, but probably many

mole - this person thinks they're in a beatrix potter story

guinea pig/chinchilla/jerboa/gerbil/any kind of fat rodent you can keep as a pet - the sweetest person you will ever meet

armadillo/pangolin/anteater/aardvark - smug, contrarian. "i just wanna be different"

mouse - vore fetishist, prey. sub.

hyena - vore fetishist, pred. probably trans masc

otter - a dommy twink, possible enby

bear - gay

panda - absolutely a white person pretending to be asian. probably running a gofund me scam with a suspicious story about how they're a professional nintendo gamer who injured their hand or something

bullfrog - a huge fat hairy straight guy

any other frog - inflation or rubber fetishist

axolotl/newt/salamander - genderfluid enby

rabbit - trad wife trans woman

squirrel - autistic and gay

deer - gay

gazelle - zootopia megafan

monkey - punk DIY artist type, definitely loves weed

ape - absolutely baffling. nothing this person does or says makes any sense. you will be left wondering whether you're speaking to a child, a person with severe mental issues, or someone who doesn't have english as a first language

elephant - mom friend

hippo - a fat fetishist or a transformation fetishist

rhino - an older cishet dude who wants to project a curmudgeonly yet approachable aura

kangaroo - definitely not an australian person. extremely focused kinkster, usually feet or inflation. more STDs than should be possible to carry

koala - an asian woman

virginia opossum - anarchist/communist punk trans man who makes zines and/or comics

australian possum - just here to have fun. wants everyone else to be having fun too. wacky funster. (sugar gliders and flying squirrels fall under this category)

any other marsupial - poser

monotremes - extreme poser, don't even bother

doberman- gay dude who tops from the bottom or a cop (there is some overlap)

german shepherd - a nazi or a cop (there is substantial overlap). definitely a furry raider. he will wear his cop uniform to con and after con will post videos pretending that someone was rude to him

afghan - arch femme

basset hound - racist

puppy - sub, probably an egg. extremely draining. cries a lot

all other dogs - just dudes being bros (gender neutral)

dragon - the furries of furries. like to talk about eating "sammiches" and "chocklit." probably an adult baby lifestyler. they will send DMs that just say "hi." they like to RP and when they contact you about a potential commission they are actually just trying to trick you into RP

griffin - the same as above but also a brony

snake - sissy hypno fetishist

turtle - an old man, probably southern. an ironic grandpa.

other scalies - furry in denial. either a child or an old person from CYD. the world's last something awful goons

any fursona with latino vibes - white

any fursona with asian vibes - latino

any fursona with native american vibes - eastern european

avian - girl who's not like other girls. hippie. vegan.

raven/crow - agender voidgoth

chicken - mom vibes

dinosaur - the absolute biggest nerd. probably has an actual degree in paleontology. definitely dresses like miss frizzle.

any invertebrate - not a real furry, their girlfriend just made them get a furaffinity account before they could get ass. either that or they've never even heard of furry, they just came up with the idea of anthropomorphics from first principles. a biology teacher or weirdo (there is some overlap)

amoeba - this is a troll

[megamett44-lover]

what if you write a fic about the triplets and the reader going through a drive thru - but - the reader gets ketchup on their burger. when the triplets and reader get to the sturniolo house to hang out afterwards, matt and reader are hanging out and matt gives the reader a kiss. since the reader had ketchup before, he's trying to ignore it and like trying to hide it because he doesn't want to hurt her feelings but she ends up finding out anyways- and just finds it hilarious. (it could be an established relationship or they confess and then kiss, whichever you think works better)

love your works and take your time writing this one <33

thank you sm 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

Matt Sturniolo × Reader

Summary: In which a trip down memory lane leads to a confession

Warnings/Notes: Profanity, she/her pronouns

Requested? Yes!

First Kiss

It was exactly 12:02 a.m. when my phone pinged with an incoming text message. I push my textbooks off my lap and roll over to grab my phone. A simple “Come outside” from Matt is at the top of my notifications.

“This kid and his ominous texts.” I laugh, putting on my slippers.

Locking my apartment and making my way downstairs, I notice the minivan parked in front of the building.

“Hey Y/N!” Chris screams as he pops his head through the sunroof.

“Shut up!” I whisper-shout. “There are people who are actually sleeping in there and I don’t feel like getting evicted my first month here!”

Walking to the drivers side, I open the back door to see Madi and Nick.

“Hey guys.” I say, getting in and sitting on the floor between Nick and Madi.

“Hey girl.” Madi says.

“Were you asleep? You look exhausted.” Nick notes.

“Gee thanks.” I roll my eyes playfully. “I was actually studying for my test tomorrow.”

“Gross school.” Chris comments.

“Very gross.” I groan. “Not that I don’t love you guys or anything, but why am I here?”

“You need a break from being holed up in your tiny ass apartment.” Chris says.

“And we missed you.” Madi adds.

“So we’re going to Mcdonald’s.” Matt says, backing out of the parking lot.

“Oh I’d kill for a big mac right now.” I say, mouth watering at the idea.

“And we may or may not be filming a little.” Nick says, referring to the camera in his lap. “If you don’t want to be in it, that’s totally fine too!”

“That’s fine.” I say. “But I look like a homeless rat.”

“You don’t look like a homeless rat.” Matt says.

“Yeah, you look like a rat with a very nice apartment.” Chris jokes.

“I actually hate you.” I mumble as everyone laughs.

Pulling into the McDonalds drive through, Nick orders for everyone. We get our food and find a secluded parking lot and set up to film.

Taking a bite from my burger, I sigh. “This burger is so fucking good.”

“It’s not that serious, Y/N.” Chris laughs.

“I haven’t had McDonalds in forever.” I protest. “It is that serious.”

“Alright, we asked you guys to send in some things you want us to talk about from our childhood, so we’re going to be doing that.” Nick says.

“Oh God.” I groan, closing my eyes. “This is going to be embarrassing.”

“Why?” Madi asks.

“Because Y/N used to be a dork.” Chris laughs.

“Okay at least I didn’t sleep in a Pokémon onsie until I was 12.” I say.

“That was me!” Matt says.

“Oh I know.” I laugh.

Nick looks down at his phone, pulling up Instagram to check the answers from his story. “What’s one injury you remember from childhood?”

“Probably the time Justin hit me with a golf club.” Matt says.

“That was terrifying.” I say. “I remember Nick running to my house in his underwear freaking out because he didn’t like blood.”

“Oh my God, I forgot about that.” Nick says. “Your mom was so confused.”

“Mine was probably when Chris pushed me off of the monkey bars at school and I got a concussion.” I say, taking a french fry from the bag.

“I did not push you!” Chris exclaims.

“You most definitely did.” Matt corrects.

“Yeah because I just so happened to fall off of the monkey bars.” I say sarcastically.

“You were clumsy.” Chris says.

“Matt witnessed it!” I say, throwing a fry at Chris.

“Yeah, you were mad because she cut in front of you in line, so you pushed her off.” Matt explains.

“Whatever.” Chris grumbles.

“One time, Y/N was yelling at me to come downstairs and I fell because someone put oil on the top step.” Nick says.

“In my defense, it was Chris’ idea.” I say.

“Yeah that was me, I’ll admit that.” Chris says.

“You were a demon, oh my God.” Madi laughs.

“He still is.” Matt agrees.

“Oooo what do you think about this one, Y/N?” Nick asks, showing me his phone.

Someone had wrote “Tell us about your first kiss!”

I genuinely start rolling laughing. “I don’t know, I don’t want your fan girls to hate me for this.”

“What is it?” Matt asks.

Nick responds by passing his phone up front to Matt and Chris. Matt reads it and his cheeks immediately turn red.

“Oh this is good!” Chris says. “I say Y/N and Matt goes first.”

Matt rolls his eyes and puts his face in his hands.

“Alright, so we’re going to be talking about our first kisses.” I say. “And mine just so happened to be with Matt.”

Madi gasps. “No way.” She laughs.

“Yes way.” I laugh with her. “We were like what, 13, 14, Matt?”

“I was in 8th grade and you were in 7th, so yeah that sounds right.” Matt says muffled through his hands.

“I was getting picked on because I was the only girl in my friend group who hadn’t had a first kiss yet and I was complaining to Matt about it.” I say.

“This is so cheesy.” Nick laughs.

“Shut up!” I laugh. “So I was complaining to Matt about it and he offered to be my first kiss. So we kissed. That’s it.”

“So wait, was she your first kiss too?” Madi asks Matt.

“Yeah, she was.” Matt answers.

“That’s so cute!” Madi exclaims.

“It was super awkward.” I say. “We made a promise to never talk about it again, until now, I guess.”

“Matt did not abide by that promise.” Nick says.

“Yeah, kid would not shut up about it for like 6 months after it happened.” Chris agrees.

“Okay, yeah, yeah. It’s y’all’s turn.” Matt says, clearly embarrassed.

“Aww Matt’s embarrassed.” Chris teases, poking Matt’s ribs. “He had a little cwushy-wushy on Y/N.”

“Hey, you tried to kiss me in kindergarten!” I say, pointing to Chris. “I had almost forgot about that!”

“It was a dare!” Chris says.

“Don’t worry guys, I didn’t kiss Chris because he had cooties.” I laugh.

“I did not have cooties!” Chris says. “You were the one who made that up and told everyone!”

“I only made it up because you pushed me off the monkey bars!” I say.

“I didn’t push you!” Chris yells.

“Yes you did!” Matt and I say at the same time.

“Uh oh, not the couple ganging up on me!” Chris throws up his hands dramatically.

“Alright, cootie boy.” I roll my eyes.

“You know what?” Chris says, practically launching himself into the backseat trying to tickle me.

“Madi help!” I scream, trying to deflect Chris as much as possible.

“You guys are actually children.” Nick says.

“Oh you want some too, big dog?” Chris says, shifting his attention to Nick.

“Chris!” Nick screams, almost dropping his Dr.Pepper on him.

The rest of the video goes off without a hitch. By the time we were finished filming, it was 2:30 a.m.

“Madi is gonna stay with us tonight, you wanna just stay at ours?” Nick asks, packing up the camera.

“C’mon, Y/N!” Chris says. “It’ll be just like old times.”

“I can never say no to a sleepover.” I laugh. “Count me in.”

“Thank God, I’ll need some female energy in that house.” Madi says, dapping me up.

As we drove back to the triplets house, I had noticed Matt was extra quiet. I put it off as being tired, but the way I kept catching him look at me in the rear view mirror made me think otherwise.

Pulling into the house, we all piled out and made our way inside.

“Goodnight, everyone.” Nick says, venturing off to his room.

Madi hugged me. “See you in the morning!” She says, following behind Nick.

“Where you sleeping, Y/N?” Chris asks. “You know my rooms always open.”

I laugh. “No offense, Chris, but you won’t be going to sleep for another three hours and I’m exhausted.” I flop down on the couch, pulling a blanket over me. “I’ll just sleep here.”

“No way.” Matt says. “You do not have to sleep on the couch. You can stay in mine if you want?”

Chris laughs, making kissy noises as he walks downstairs to his room.

“Jesus, that kid.” I laugh. I look over at Matt, who is looking at me with expectant eyes. “Yeah, I’ll sleep in your room, if that’s cool?”

“Mi casa es su casa.” Matt says, walking down the hall to his room.

“Okay, Flo-Rida.” I say, following him.

Matt flops down on the bed, throwing a pillow over his face. Walking over, I yank the pillow off of him.

“Hey!” He protests.

I sit down beside him. “Okay, spill.” I demand.

Matt looks at me quizzically. “What do you mean?”

“Ever since I talked about our kiss, you’ve been acting weird. Spill.” I say.

“I haven’t.” Matt says. “I’m just tired.”

“Mhm.” I say. “I don’t believe you.”

“Why not?” Matt rolls his eyes.

“Just don’t.” I shrug. I roll over to the other side of the bed, getting under the blankets.

Matt flips the lights off, before joining me in bed.

“Goodnight, Matt.” I say, rolling over to face him.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” Matt says, pulling the blankets over him as well.

It’s silent for about 5 minutes, and I feel myself starting to doze off, when suddenly, the weight in the bed shifts. I open my eyes to see Matt sitting up beside me.

“Matt, what’re you-” I start.

“I like you, Y/N.” Matt blurts out.

I blink my eyes really hard to make sure I’m not dreaming and I shake my head.

“Ever since we were kids, I’ve liked you.” Matt says. “The feelings would come and go, and I really tried to make them go for the sake of our friendship, but I really, really like you, Y/N.”

Matt looks back at me as I stare wide-eyed at him. “Really?” I whisper.

“Why do you think I volunteered to be your first kiss?” Matt asks. “Chris wasn’t lying when he said I talked about that kiss for 6 months. He wasn’t lying when he said I had a crush on you. I could just…never find the right time to tell you.”

I sit up beside Matt, grabbing his hand. “I really wish you would’ve told me sooner.” I say.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Matt says. “You don’t know how much it killed me to see you with other guys, Y/N. That shit was so unbearable.”

It’s silent for a moment before Matt sighs deeply.

“I understand if you don’t feel the same way, I really do. But I just had to tell you so-” I cut Matt off by placing my lips on his.

Feeling his lips against mine, suddenly I’m 13 again in Boston having my first kiss with my best friend. His hands find the sides of my face and it’s like the world stopped spinning. It’s like everything around us has faded away and it’s just us.

We pull away slowly, each of us gasping for air.

“I don’t know where I got the balls to do that.” I whisper. I open my eyes to notice Matt grimacing a bit.

“What’s wrong?” I ask. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“No, no. Nothings wrong.” Matt says, grabbing my hand.

“No, something is definitely wrong.” I say.

Matt turns a little red before looking at his lap. “It’s just…was there ketchup on your burger earlier?”

“Yeah…?” I say, confused. And then it suddenly makes sense. I throw myself back into the bed, dying in a fit of laughter. “Oh my God!” I laugh, gasping for air.

I sit up, looking at Matt. “I am so sorry.” I say, still laughing.

“It’s okay.” He says, smiling. “I’ll taste ketchup every day as long as it’s from your lips.”

I roll my eyes. “You’re so corny.”

“Maybe.” He smiles. “So is it safe to say you feel the same?”

“Don’t make me kiss you with my ketchup breath again, Matthew.” I say.

“Is that a promise?” Matt asks, slowly pulling me back into another kiss.

a/n: help this is one of the longest stories I’ve written. but if I were to make a tag list, who would want to be added to it???

[tiramiiswu]

ᯓ࣪ ִֶָ☾. desiderium

0.1 Independence Day & Fireworks

⋆.˚ young justice x genshin impact ⋆.˚

✦ masterlist || next ✦ young justice x adeptus!reader ✦ word count: 13.7k ✦ warnings: none ✦ originally posted on quotev (may 18, 2023) ✦ a/n: purely writing this to appease the goblin in my brain. ✦ tide caller is supposed to be written with an ambiguous/unstated gender as to help with projection and will be referred to with they/them pronouns respectively. i kind of go on autopilot when writing and type out the wrong word without thinking so if anyone catches me slipping and accidentally using the wrong pronoun please let me know and tell me where you caught it so i can change it asap :'D sometimes my hands type a little slip of the brain and i never catch it until it's too late ^^;;

✦ (3/12/25) edit: fixed some formatting issues with my dividers, i didn’t check to see how they’d look on mobile and had to adjust their length 😭

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

Washington D.C.; July 4th, ??? CDT

        “Okay, I’m officially whelmed,” is the first thing to fall from Robin’s mouth as he and his fellow sidekicks—Aqualad and Kid Flash—stood in a stunned silence staring at what towered before them. 

        Lined up in several rows and columns were several vertical cylindrical containers that pulsated with a strong electrical energy, illuminating the expansive room with an eerie neon blue glow and a notable hum sounding in the air. And to think it was all kept several dozens of stories below ground, completely unnoticed by anyone above ground. 

        The real Project Cadmus.

        Upon a closer inspection the three noticed the very inhuman shapes within each container. They were large, insectoid looking creatures, almost akin to fireflies, though their legs were longer than a human arm (one pair looked more like long protruding horns due to their placement) and their wings were short, almost spine-like along their backs. A large bulb of sorts hung off their back and down their back legs and gave off a bright, cyan glow. 

        Kid Flash began walking forward, taking it all in, “This is how they hide this massive underground facility from the world. The real Cadmus isn’t on the grid, it generates its own power with these… Things.” he stops, gesturing to the imprisoned creatures surrounding them. “Must be what they’re bred for.”

        “Even the name is a clue, the Cadmus of myth created a new race by sowing dragons’ teeth into the earth.” Aqualad stated.

        Robin notices a computer console to the side of them, “And this Cadmus creates new life too. Let’s find out why,” he extends a wire from the holo-computer in his glove and connects it to the console. He begins hacking the Cadmus database for information on the strange creatures the boys had discovered. He relays the information he sifts through to the others, “They call them Genomorphs… Woah, look at the stats on these things! Super strength, telepathy, razor claws— These are living weapons!”

        Kid Flash leans over his shoulder, reading the seemingly endless scroll of information recorded about each Genomorph created at Cadmus, “They’re engineering an army, but for who?“ 

        Aqualad moves to stand behind them as something on the holographic screen catches the Boy Wonder’s eyes, “Wait there’s something else, Project Kr, a-and a new input as recently as this month, Project Riptide. The files are triple- encrypted, I can’t—“

        He’s cut off as a new voice booms from across the room, “Don’t move!” The three sidekicks jolt up, startled by the new presence in the room. Before them was a tall man in a dark blue jumpsuit wearing a gold helmet with a strong looking build. He wielded a shield and was covered in some other gilded armor pieces alongside his helmet. 

        The three noted the extra company he brought with him. Surrounding him were smaller elf-like Genomorphs, an even smaller one sitting passively on his shoulder, like a monkey. They all shared a similar humanoid body that was a sickly gray in color, a pair of beady red eyes and striking red veins apparent on the arms and ribs of each creature. The smallest Genomorph had a pair of tiny horns protruding from its forehead. 

        Surprisingly though, the helmet-donned man seemed just as shocked to see them there as well. “Wait. Robin? Aqualad? Kid Flash?”

        Robin seemed to snort a little, making a quick jab at his speedster companion, “At least he got your name right.” 

        Aqualad ignored them as he spoke up, recognizing the man, “I know you. Guardian. A hero.” 

        “I do my best.” Was the quick reply he received. 

        “Then, what are you doing here?” Kid Flash inquired, squinting at him accusingly.

        “I'm chief of security. You're trespassing.” Guardian stated matter-of-factly. Though from his next statement he didn’t seem too apprehensive of the three now that he recognizes them. “But we can call the Justice League. Figure this out.”

        During this exchange Robin had been quietly downloading all of the contents they uncovered from the Cadmus database. Quickly retracting the USB cord from the console while his friends had been keeping Guardian distracted. “You think the League’s gonna approve of you breeding weapons?!” He shouted accusingly at the man.

        The helmed man seemed taken aback, genuinely shocked to hear such a thing, “Weapons? What are you… What have I..?” He trails off, raising a hand to hold against his head. He repeated, confused as his eyes began to close. As something flashed across his expression, as if a fog was starting to lift from his head. “Ugh, my head…”

        The clarity seems to fade, and the fog quickly creeps back to cloud his mind as the little Genomorph on his shoulder lights up it’s horns to relay a message to Guardian. His eyes snap back open, hardened into a glare and looking more determined than before, “Take them down,” he ordered. “No mercy!”

        The Genomorphs sprung into action with an animalistic snarl, making a charge towards the three teens with lethal intent. Robin jumps forward and drops a smoke bomb in response to is sudden attack, using the obscured field of view to shoot a grappling hook above to a beam hanging overhead to make an escape. An alarm began blearing during the disturbance.

        Kid Flash manages to dodge the razor claws and gnashing fangs of the Genomorphs while blitzing them with extreme speed, taking down several of them in his wake. 

        One of the Genomorphs had launched itself onto Aqualad’s back, though he managed to rip the creature off of him before Guardian came barreling towards him. The two traded several blows before the Atlantean intercepted a strike from Guardian’s shield, sending shockwaves through the metal and rendering Guardian and the miniature Genomorph incapacitated on the floor. 

        The two notice Robin’s absence and find him by the elevator, his holo-pad out as he attempted to hack the industrial elevator for them to escape through. Kid rushes over to him, skidding to a stop before giving him an sarcastically irked, “Wait to be a team player, Rob.”

        To which the younger boy says: “Weren’t you right behind me?” 

        Seeing two Genomorphs tailing after him, Aqualad books it to the elevator, barely making it in after tucking and rolling into the metal chute. The three heard a metallic THUMP from the other side as the Genomorphs collided against the now shut elevator doors.

        Glancing at the elevator’s floor screen, he’s unable to contain his utter disbelief as the sub level numbers displayed above the door began increasing, “We’re headed down?”

        Kid Flash turns to the other masked teen, “Dude, out is UP,” he shouts, pointing upwards to the ceiling.

        Robin seems to give him an incredulous look in response, “Excuse me? Project Kr is DOWN, on sub-level 52.” 

        Before any sort of fight could break out between the two Aqualad steps in, placing himself between them, “This is out of control,” he states, he seemed stressed by the course of events that had just occurred, at least as stressed as the stoic Atlantean let on.

        “Perhaps,” he sighed. “Perhaps we should contact the League…”

        The three fall silent for a moment, fully realizing just how deep they had gotten themselves into (both literally and figuratively). 

        That is, until the elevator makes a ‘ding’ to indicate they’ve arrived at their destination. 

        The elevator doors open to reveal a disturbing sight. The once cement walls and flooring have been replaced with a soft, flesh lined tunnel, only accompanied by several pods lined in rows along the walls that acted as a macabre decor. There was a division in the path that followed ahead of them, leading to two unknown rooms.

        The atmosphere became eerier, and it only cemented the reality of what the three had stumbled into by complete accident when investigating a simple building fire.

        Robin is seemingly undeterred by the disturbance in their environment, quickly taking initiative as he dashes out of the elevator. Kid Flash is silent for a moment before making a half-assed attempt to reason with his remaining companion , “We are already here…”

        Aqualad just sighed, defeated by the curious nature of his two friends, “Which way?”

        Their shorter companion scoffs, “Yeah, bizarre-Iooking hallway one or bizarre-Iooking hallway two?”

        They didn’t have to spend much time deciding however as a stern voice calls from behind them with a quick, “Hold!”

        The three boys are quick to noticed the horned individual appearing down the first hallway. Standing there is a tall, slender man with blue skin. In addition to his strange complexion, he bore a pair of aforementioned horns, lacked a nose, his ears were notably pointed and fin-like, and two ribbons of flesh, originating on his cheeks. He was adorned in plain white hospital apparel.

        The strange man then raised his hand, his horns began to glow like the small Genomorph from before. A few crates lying behind them in the hall began to float in the air before exploding above the sidekick trio’s heads. Robin threw an exploding birdarang towards him before the three began escaping down the second hallway.

        Kid Flash runs ahead of them, though when he turned a corner he nearly crashes into a Cadmus scientist. He slides past her, tripping her in the process. He looks back from where she had come from and saw the gradually closing door that read “Project Kr”. 

        He turns back to his companions who were approaching at a significantly slower speed than the closing door. He then spots a few air tanks placed near the door and quickly thinking picked one up to then lodge in the door, preventing it from closing. “Hurry!” he shouts to the others before he jumped between the gap and into the chamber, Aqualad and Robin following shortly after. 

        The former looks through the gap and sees Guardian and his Genomorphs closing in on them. He steps back and kicks the air tank out of the gap which causes the doors to snap shut with a loud CLANK!

        Robin had been typing something quickly into his keypad, when he finished he announced to them, “I disabled the door. We're safe—“

        “We're trapped,” Aqualad had corrected, more stressed than ever. Though before any debate on what happened could start, Kid Flash drew both their attention to the matter at hand, “Uh, guys? You’ll wanna see this.”

        Standing before him was another Cadmus computer console, though this time it was only attached to a single tank. Kid Flash pressed a button on the console that activated several lights near the center of the lab room. Now illuminated the boys could see what was contained within the stark white pod, a sleeping boy. He appeared to be close to their age, with dark hair and a fair complexion. He slept peacefully unaware of the chaos that had just occurred outside his pod. Above him were three of the small monkey-esque Genomorphs like the one Guardian had on his shoulder. 

        Though the most startling thing about him was the skin tight suit he donned, it was an equally as stark white as his pod, the lighting and lack of contrast made it reflect a blinding light. On his chest was a bright red shield with a large S dead in the center

        The symbol of Superman.

        Kid Flash walked in a slight stupor towards the pod, reading the label on the lower part of the glass aloud, “Big K little r, the atomic symbol for Krypton!” He turned to the other two, his brows furrowed somewhat. “Clone?”

        Aqualad immediately turned to their more tech savvy friend, “Robin, hack.” He ordered.

        “Right, right,” he whips out his holo-pad again and connects it to the console with the extending wire like he had done before. After bypassing Cadmus’s security once more he began reading the newly uncovered information about the project. “Weapon designation Superboy. A clone force-grown in— 16 weeks?! From DNA acquired from Superman." 

        “Stolen from Superman.” Aqualad corrected with a scowl.

        “No way the big guy knows about this.” Kid Flash agrees.

        “Solar suit allows him to absorb yellow sun radiation 24/7.” The Boy Wonder continues.

        Aqualad gestures to the sleeping creatures above him—Superboy, “And these creatures?” He inquired.

        “Genomorph-Gnomes, Telepathic, force feeding him an education.”

        A grimace starting to form on Kid Flash’s face, “And we can guess what else, they’re making a slave out of… well, Superman’s son.” 

        “And now we contact the league,” Aqualad states firmly. There was no room to argue at this point with what they’ve discovered. He presses the Atlantean A symbol on his belt while the others attempt to activate their comms. 

        “No signal,” Robin says.

        Kid Flash looks to the other two, “We’re in too deep. Literally.”

        After a few minutes of contemplating their next move, the three notice the G-Gnomes horns lighting up above the Superboy. Kid Flash looks to Aqualad and Robin, “This is wrong.” He says grimly.

        Robin agrees, nodding, “We can’t leave him like this.”

        Aqualad takes another moment to think, before coming to a decision, “Set him free,” he looks to Robin, firm in his decision. “Do it.”

        Robin takes to the console, quickly typing out a command to the pod for it to open its lid. The air compressed within the pod hisses as it escapes into the open room, the glass lid lifting upward and the metal plates around it sliding open.

        For a moment the boy inside remained still, peaceful even. Then they saw his hands stretch out at his sides, the knuckles of his fingers cracking before forming into a fist at his side. His eyes snap open, and the trio watch as he springs to life, immediately jumping to attack them.

        He attacks Aqualad first, he tackles him to the ground before raising his arms and bringing them back down in a violent manner, punching the Atlantean boy repeatedly before Robin and Kid Flash come to intervene. They attempt to restrain his arms as well as try to snap some sense into him—

        “Woah! Hang on Supey!”

        “We’re—on your side!”

        —But to no avail. The Super-clone shoves Kid Flash off of him, flinging him back into a glass container. He crashes into it before falling and knocking himself out after his head collided with the ground. He falls over limply and lies still.

        Robin pulls various items out of his utility belt and throwing them at their assailant,, attempting to spray him with gas and even tasing him before Superboy slammed him into the concrete and stepping onto his chest, attempting to crush the smaller boy beneath his foot as Robin struggled beneath him, feeling his ribs crack under the pressure.

        Aqualad looks to see Robin struggling against the clone, taking out his water bearers and taking an aggressive stance, forming a solid hammer in his hands before charging at him, “ENOUGH!” He manages to knock Superboy off of Robin, sending him spiraling against the pod which leaves a large dent in the metal due to the force. Aqualad then tries to help Robin stand to his knees, but the poor boy simply falls back down onto his back, rendered fully unconscious due to Superboy’s assault.

        As Superboy regains his footing he begins walking menacingly towards Aqualad, who attempts to stop him, saying, “We... are trying... to help you—!” Before the clone’s expression twists into a snarl and leaps towards him again to engage in an exchange of blows once more. This exchange stopped momentarily as Aqualad manages to get behind him and interlocks his arms behind him in a restraint before shocking him with a strong electric charge.

        This however only causes his opponent to yell before leaping back first into the ceiling, slamming Aqualad into the hard unmoving surface in an attempt to shake him off. When this doesn’t work he starts slamming him repeatedly against the roof before Aqualad detaches from behind him and falls unconscious.

        Superboy assesses the situation and sees that all three of the sidekicks had been defeated by his hands. Calmly, he began walking to the entrance of the lab. 

        He punched the metal door until it flew open, falling shortly in front of him. Behind it were some scientists, Guardian, and several Genomorphs. A male scientist with long brown hair tied in the back in a pony tail stepped forward. His name was Dr. Desmond. He wore a standard white lab coat, glasses, brown sandals, he had slight wrinkles on his face and streaks of white in his hair. He had smiled in a pleased way when Superboy emerged from the lab, and he inspected his weapon’s success. Simply giving him a brief, “Atta’ boy.” 

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

        In a stark white room were seven large monitors, on each screen was the silhouette of an obscured individual. Dr. Desmond entered the room lacking the confident superiority he tended to have beneath the surface of the Cadmus facility. He now stands before each monitor. A voice emits from one of the screens, “Dr. Desmond. You require an audience with the Light?”

        “Yes. Very sorry to disturb you at this late hour—“

        Another cuts him off, “Just make your report.”

        “Of course,” the scientist cleared his throat. “Well, we had a small fire here at Project Cadmus. The origin of the incident is still unclear… but it seems to have attracted some unwanted attention. Three sidekicks, Robin, Aqualad and Kid Flash...breached security. 

        “They found and released the weapon. The Superboy. Of course, the clone is under our telepathic control... and, as ordered, turned against his would-be liberators. The three are contained and we don't believe the League knows they're here. Uh... What should I do with them?” He was unsure as to what he was supposed to do now, more worried about losing his job (or worse) for allowing such a blunder to occur in the first place.

        There was but a beat of silence before they spoke again, “Clone them,” the second voice says. “Add them to the current cloning schedule, alongside Project Riptide.” 

        The first voice agrees, stating, “The substitutes will serve the Light. And only the Light.”

        “And… the originals?” Desmond inquired.

        “Dispose of them. Leave no trace.”

        For the first time since he entered this meeting room, an evil smile crept its way back onto Dr. Desmond’s face.

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

        A calm, yet stern voice rang through the barely conscious minds of the three sidekicks, attempting to rouse them, “Time runs short. You must awaken.”

        When they did not stir the voice became more demanding, and a force jolted them awake, stating, “You must awaken now!”

        The three had awoken startled, finding themselves inside a more industrial looking pod than the one they had freed the Super-clone from. They were strapped against a metal plate by steel bands, restraining their wrists and ankles against the plate behind them. 

        What Kid Flash noticed after realizing his current predicament was the piercing stare of the backstabbing boy standing below them. 

        Superboy stared intently at him, it was hard to tell what he was doing whether it be examining him or simply trying to kill him with a single look, but Kid Flash was up to his limit with him, “What? What do you want?!” He spat, though it didn’t seem to deter the Kryptonian clone. “Quit staring you’re creepin’ me out!”

        “Uh, KF, how ‘bout we NOT tick off the guy who can fry us with a look?” Kid Flash turned to his right to find Robin in the same position as him. He could swore there was something next to Robin, another tank, but from his limited field of vision it took an excessive amount of neck craning in order to check. To to the left of him was Aqualad, “We only sought to help you—“

        Distracting himself from the fourth pod, Kid Flash cut in to chew the clone out, “Yeah, we free you and you turn on us! How’s that for grati—“ 

        “Kid, please. Be quiet now,” Aqualad cut him off, trying not to escalate the situation even further than it already had. “I believe our friend was not in full control of his actions.”

        Then, surprising the three captives to no extent, the clone spoke, “What if I..? Hn… What if I wasn’t?” His voice was low, somewhat rough and rasped from a general lack of use. It was as if he had spoken for the first time since his creation (and judging by his general timeline of living it probably was).

        Kid Flash was the first to react, “He can talk?!”

        This earned him a glare from Superboy, who found a much stronger voice that was laced in irritation, “Yes… he can!”

        The Atlantean and Boy Wonder each gave Kid Flash an unamused side eye, to which he sheepishly replied, “It’s not like I said ‘it’.”

        Aqualad seemed to catch on to the rising tension, hoping to steer it away from the premature death of his speedster companion he focuses his attention back to Superboy, “The genomorphs taught you telepathically.”

        He nodded somewhat, it was a bit difficult to see but it was enough for Aqualad to see. “They taught me much,” he said curtly. “I can read, write. I know the names of things.”

        “But have you seen them?” Robin pressed. “Have they ever actually let you see the sky or the sun?”

        “Images are implanted in my mind,” he seemed to shrink somewhat, regretfully admitting, “But, no, I have not seen them.”

        Aqualad frowned, “Do you know what you are? Who you are?”

        This question seemed to strengthen his resolve, though not exactly in the way Aqualad might have been hoping. He watched Superboy’s poster straighten, and in a tone that felt preprogrammed he stated firmly, “A clone made from the DNA of the Superman. Created to replace him should he perish. To destroy him should he turn from the Light.”

        Aqualad’s companions shared a nervous glance while he responded carefully, “To be like Superman is a worthy aspiration.” He told him. “But like Superman, you deserve a life of your own. Beyond that solar suit. Beyond your pod. Beyond Cadmus.”

        This irked Superboy, it seemed to trigger a newly characteristic anger he’s shown since his awakening, “I live because of Cadmus. It is my home!” He growled.

        Robin looked at him in what could only be described as pity, “Your home is a test tube, we can show you the sun.” 

        “Uh, pretty sure it’s after midnight. But we can show you the moon,” offered Kid Flash, trying to add something helpful into the conversation.”

        “We can show you, introduce you to Superman.” Aqualad offers him.

        This catches his attention. The three watched his expression soften, his eyes shining with a glimmer of hope. It had been the softest expression he’s shown since they discovered his serene expression sleeping in his pod.

        This tender moment was cut short by a snide voice coming from the entrance of the lab chamber they were in. “No, they can’t.” Desmond approached them, Guardian and the scientist Kid Flash tripped from before—Dr. Spence���flanked his sides. “They will be… otherwise occupied.” He turned to his subordinates and began to order them to work. “Activate the cloning process!” 

        A genuine alarm spread across Robin’s face, “Pass! Batcave’s crowded enough!” He exclaimed, attempting to cover up his alarm with his usual witty banter.

        Desmond ignored him, “Add them to the schedule set for Project Riptide,” glancing at Superboy the scientist grew agitated. “And get the weapon back to its pod!”

        Despite the circumstance Kid Flash seemed to pout at hearing this, “Hey, how come he gets to call Supey an it?” He asked indignantly.

        Guardian placed his hand on Superboy’s shoulder, though with one final glance at Aqualad (and another plea for help from him as well) he shrugged him off. Desmond seemed to catch onto this exchange rather quickly, “Oh, don’t start thinking now.” He groaned, a G-Gnome hopping from his shoulder to Superboy’s. Condescendingly, he began speaking down to him. “See, you're not a real boy. You're a weapon. And you belong to me. Well, to Cadmus. Same thing. Now get back to your pod.” He commanded. 

        Without another word, Superboy obediently turned around and began walking out of the lab. 

        Desmond then turned back to Spence, “Where’s Project Riptide?” he inquired, irritated.

        Spence had input something into the console before her and in doing so caused a light to turn on in a pod placed to the right of Robin. There was a fourth person strapped to one of the machines the boys were hooked up to (this came as somewhat of a shock to the three of them) however it was hard to make out any discernible features due to their slumped over posture indicating they would not be conscious for the next step of Cadmus’s plan. What they could see though was that rather than a solar suit like Superboy’s they were wearing some very outlandish clothes that had several intricate details and patterns with an otherworldly feel to them.

        Desmond stared at the fourth pod for a moment before turning back to Dr. Spence, he nodded. This acted as an indicator for her to continue and she put another sequence of inputs into the console. The three sidekicks began to writhe and scream as they felt an excruciating pain shoot through them. Several metal probes jab them in the chest, simultaneously electrocuting them and extracting blood into tanks attached to the machines. 

        Desmond says something to his subordinates over the din, “Where’s Dubbilex?” Before being startled by the sudden appearance of said Genomorph stepping out of the shadows of the room, standing beside Desmond. “Lurking as usual… Get the G-Gnomes downloading their memories. When that's done, delete the source material.” 

        During this exchange Aqualad managed to bite back his screams, and over the nearly deafening sounds of his friends anguish he spoke under his breath, attempting to speak to the Kryptonian boy via the presumption he indeed had super-hearing, “Superboy, you live. That gives you the right to follow your own path. A weapon or a person? The choice is yours. But ask yourself: what would Superman do?”

        There was a beat. Maybe two passed. And as the sidekicks writhe from the extraction process, the door of the lab is promptly kicked open by the individual on the other side, propelling it into the large computers across the room. This shuts off the DNA extractors and alleviates the trio of sidekicks of any more pain from said machines.

        Desmond is furious, immediately turning to his creation to bark out, “I told you to get back to your—!” He’s roughly tossed to the side by Superboy alongside Dubbilex and Guardian who both attempted to get in the Kryptonian’s way.

        Superboy glowered down at the bespectacled man, “Don’t give me orders.” He growled, before continuing his stride towards the sidekicks.

        Having recovered somewhat from the machines torture, Kid Flash is the first to acknowledge the sudden turn of events, “You here to help us or fry us?” 

        Superboy narrowed his eyes at the redheaded speedster, as if thinking something over. “Huh, I don’t seem to have heat vision. So I suppose helping you is my only option,” he says with a small smirk.

        In this moment Robin’s pod began hissing to life, the metal door sliding open as he slipped out, wringing his wrists in his hands, “Ugh, finally. Lucky Batman isn't here. He'd have my head for taking so long!” It was then apparent he had been attempting to pick the lock of his wrist cuffs since he woke up. 

        “Seriously? That’s what you’re worried about?” Kid Flash deadpanned. “The whole League will have our heads after tonight!”

        Robin ignores him as he throws a pair of bolas at the only remaining scientist in the room, restraining Dr. Spence. He then walks over to the console she was occupying and types a new input, this opens the other pod doors open with a hiss. Then he directs some of his attention to the clone, “Free Aqualad, I’ll get Kid Mouth.” 

        Superboy didn’t take too well to receiving another order from someone, “Don’t you give me orders either,” he growled out,  but nonetheless he leaps up to tear the cuffs off the Atlantean. Robin picked the locks for the cuffs on Kid Flash.

        Aqualad thanks him as the three sidekicks descend to the ground with Superboy about to follow. That is, until he remembered the unconscious fourth captive. He looks to the pod on the other side of the row, its lid open but its inhabitant still hanging from their restraints. To anyone else they could assume they’re unconscious state was caused by death, they hadn’t stirred this whole time. But Superboy could hear the faint, methodical sound of their heartbeat beneath the whirring of the machine. The sidekicks called out to him, but he had made his decision. He maneuvered his way from Aqualad’s pod to the other and began tearing their cuffs off as well. If he was being freed tonight, it’s only fair he helped free his fellow Project. They fell forward limply as he caught them with his arm. Realizing they weren’t going to wake just, yet he supports their body with his and leaps back down to join the others. 

        Desmond sees the four of them (plus his new Project) begin to race out of the lab, “Y-You’ll never get out of here! I’ll have you back in pods before morning!” He shrieks from the ground.

        “That guy is not whelmed, not whelmed at all,” Robin muttered, only stopping momentarily to throw some birdarangs into the DNA containers and triggering them to explode, destroying any of their DNA collected by Cadmus.

        “What is with you and this ‘whelmed’ thing?” Kid Flash asks as Robin rejoins them. They race down the fleshy hall, passing by the pod-like inserts in the walls as they begin to glow an eerie red. 

        “We are still fifty-two levels below ground,” Aqualad states. “But if we can make the elevator—!”

        He’s cut off as several ginormous Genomorphs emerge to block their way, the smaller Genomorphs they had fought before against Guardian begin emerging from the pods behind them, snarling and growling like wild beasts. 

        During this, Project Riptide began stirring awake. Superboy was startled to feel them move, even more so to feel them shove him away from them. 

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

        You groaned, holding your throbbing head with a gloved hand (the others took notice of the strange blue pendant embedded into the top side of your wrist) “What… What happened?” before opening your eyes to see an absurd sight before them, snapping your eyes wider and frantically looking around, “Where am I? What the Hell is this place? And what the Hell are those??”

        They don’t have time to answer them as one of the large Genomorphs raised both of its fists in preparation of crushing them. You all manage to duck out of the way, though Kid Flash is very much caught off guard when you begin to pull a spear out of literally thin air. It was a long, double pronged polearm fading from a dark navy to a brighter blue by the tip. At the end of it was a teardrop shaped pommel with a decorative end in the shape of a small anchor. He stared at you in bewilderment, “Where did you get that—“

        You ignored him as you began to pull back your spear before hurling it like a javelin at a frightening speed into the neck of one of the smaller Genomorphs, the force pinning its now limp body into the wall next to it. Before he could ask again you seemed to have moved so quickly it looked as if you had teleported over to your spear before ripping it back out and making another dash to a different Genomorph. 

        The other sidekicks had made their way to the elevator, however their newly liberated companions seemed to be preoccupied in trying to eliminate the Genomorph threats to follow them. While you dashed to-and-fro around the Genomorphs, slashing them with your spear, Superboy had launched one of the lumbering Genomorphs into the wall. This impact ran a crack up the wall and started to cause parts of the ceiling to break off and come crashing into the ground, “Superboy! The goal is to escape, not bury ourselves here!” Aqualad shouts.

        This seems to peak his already heightened aggression, “YOU WANT ESCAPE?!” He challenged, before swinging one of the larger Genomorphs by the arm and swinging it into the horde of others. He then grabs your wrist abruptly—startling you—before regrouping with the others by the elevator.

        Aqualad tears the elevator doors open to reveal the dark empty chasm of the shaft. Kid Flash and Robin each make their way into the elevator, the former jumping onto the wall of the elevator shaft while the latter uses his grappling hook. Superboy takes Aqualad into one arm and tries to do the same for you as well, however before he could grab a hold of you, you managed to step away from him as you began to arch your polearm up before launching it into the side of the shaft wall. The two watch as you take a big leap up before grabbing onto the spear end sticking out from the wall. You then began to scale the elevator shaft with now notably clawed hands, your spear dissipating into gold particles.

        Now only having to worry about one passenger, Superboy tightens his hold on Aqualad and takes a powerful leap into the air. He and Aqualad soar several stories up, making it all the way to about SL-9, before suddenly losing momentum, the two suddenly beginning to descend downwards, “I-I’m falling,” he realizes in somewhat of a daze. 

        You had seen the two boys pass them while you continued climbing steadily up the side of the chute, though you were very shocked to see them suddenly pass them going down this time. Groaning somewhat they lept off of the wall and descended downwards in order to catch up to them right as Robin looked up and threw one of his birdarangs into the wall above. Once you had caught up to them they grabbed Aqualad by the arm, causing him to tighten his hold on Superboy, before a pair of false wings deployed from around your shoulder blades. They were then falling slower, though the extra weight of two more passengers still caused the wind glider to drag down faster than it was supposed to while you heaved them up with you. 

        Once you glided near the birdarang embedded into the wall you heaved the two over by the dark skinned boy’s arm, helping him latch onto the new protrusion in the wall around SL-15. You in turn latch onto the wall beside them, observing the conflicted expression cast over Superboy’s face. He wore a crestfallen expression, and he began to question himself, murmuring, “Superman can fly… Why can’t I fly?”

        Kid Flash pipes in suddenly, drawing your attention from the one currently having some form of an identity-crisis to the level below, “Don't know, but it does look like you can leap tall buildings in a single bound... Still cool,” he reassures, offering to help the distraught boy up to the small ledge beside him. Aqualad hopping down beside them.

        Still a little dazed he manages to thank the speedster before Robin alerts them to the imminent danger they were about to be in, “Guys! This’ll have to be our exit!” He shouts as the high speed express elevator makes its quick descent above them.

        Aqualad and Superboy take out the elevator door, the latter taking one final swing to it before you all dive out of the way from the rapidly descending elevator right before it slammed all of you into the void. You weren’t given much of a break however as a group of Genomorphs came down the main hallway, attracted to the sound of the destroyed metal doors, causing the five of you to break out in a run. 

        As you were running down the halls, Superboy suddenly directs the group, “Go left! Left!” The group listened, mostly as there wasn’t much room to try and press him about where you were going. Then another call, “Right!” 

        However, upon following his directions this time, you found yourself at a dead end, the only thing of note being the sight of a single vent near the top of the wall. You gave him somewhat of a cross look , “It’s a dead end,” you stated lowly.

        Kid Flash was the second to jump on him, “Great directions Supey,” he says sarcastically. “Are you trying to get us re-podded??”

        “No. I… I don’t understand,” he seemed genuinely confused at this outcome.

        Robin nudged Kid Flash to the side, a wide grin breaking out across his face as he excitedly stated, “Don’t apologize, this is perfect!”

        They work to get the vent cover off quickly, then after discarding it to the side the boys assist each other in getting up and crawling into the vent itself. Robin led the charge while Aqualad, you, Kid Flash, and Superboy followed shortly behind.

        It was during this escapade through the vents that Kid Flash (who was currently crawling right behind you) decided to mention the elephant in the room, “By the way, uh, who are you exactly? We never really had time to get your name.”

        You wanted to look back and glare at the redhead, however your current circumstance prevented you from doing so, “Is now really the time for this?”��

        Robin piped in from the front, “So far we’re not sure if there’ll be any time in the future, so now is definitely the time to ask.”

        You rolled your eyes, “If it quells your incessant probing then so be it. For now, you may call me Tide Caller.” 

        “What? No first or last name?”

        “None that I feel like telling you at the moment.” You did not feel like informing them of anything aside from your adeptus title until you found out just exactly what was going on around here. “Now I get to ask you some questions: What is going on? And what exactly is this place?”

        “It’s a bit… complicated. Short answer? We’re in an underground research facility hidden from the rest of world that’s focused on cloning and creating living weapons, which were the creatures chasing us from before, that are called Genomorphs,” Robin explains, though he as a bit preoccupied with following the layout of the ventilation system to guide them to an exit. “We came to investigate a fire that started in the building above ground but upon further inspection we ended up going way deeper than anticipated, eventually we found Superboy and later you and the rest is history.”

        You blinked owlishly at his explanation, “I… have no idea what half of the words you just said means, but it’s enough for me to know that this place is bad news,” you take a few cursory glances between the boys in front of you and the one behind you. “Who are you three anyway?”

        Wally balked at this question, “Wait seriously? You don’t know who we are? Robin, Aqualad? Kid Flash? No, not ringing any bells?”

        “No, not really… Am I supposed to?”

        “Seriously? Dude, what kind of rock have you been living under?”

        You scoffed at his question, “Forgive me if I’m unable to recall a group of such strangely dressed individuals and their equally as strange titles,” you grow silent for a moment before a follow up question comes to mind. “Why are you all dressed like that anyway?”

        “Oh, as if you aren’t—!” 

        “Enough! Now is not the time to start arguing.” Aqualad shut you both down before you could start a fight while you all were still traversing the vents. 

        You could hear Kid Flash grumble something under his breath behind you. After some time he started to complain, “Ugh, at this rate we’ll never get out.”

        Superboy stops suddenly at the end of the line you’ve formed, shushing the group as he looks behind him. “Listen.” Unbeknownst to the rest of you, his super-hearing had picked up some movement far behind them within the vents. If he focused he could hear the quick, clambering sounds of claws against metal as several Genomorphs began to scurry through the vents in an attempt to close in on them.

        The group began to advance further, Robin leading you down a certain path as you all crawled after him. He kicked open a vent cover at the end of the path and jumped down, Aqualad followed in order to help the rest of you down from the top of the wall. Robin was typing something frantically onto the holo-pad on his wrist, “I already deactivated the internal security cameras during the trek in the vents, now if I just…” he trailed off somewhat as he hooked up his glove to the wall.  A moment later he looked triumphant, “I hacked the motion sensors.” He states with a smirk tugging at his lips.

        Kid Flash was the one to respond first with a cheerful: “Sweet.”

         “Still plenty of them between us and out.”

        Kid Flash seemed undeterred by this information, pulling down his goggles, saying, “But I’ve finally got room to move,” before barreling out the door and down several flights of stairs, clearing a path for you and the others by knocking several Genomorphs down in the process. 

        You stared at his abrupt exit in awe, “I take it the ‘Flash’ in his name refers to his speed?” You wondered aloud, earning a small laugh from your shortest companion as the rest of you followed in tow. 

        Robin, who was still in the process of hacking as you ran, called out to your group, “More behind us!” Once you had all passed him, Superboy came to a stop on the platform behind you, slamming his foot on the connecting stairs. This caused the remaining stairwell as well as all of the horde of approaching Genomorphs to come crashing down.

        Kid Flash continued to speed up the winding column of stairs before skidding to a stop once spotting the door indicating his destination to be Sub-Level 1. Before he could reach the door, racing towards it as we speak, a blaring alarm pierced the air, causing a pair of heavy-duty doors to automatically slam shut. Kid Flash couldn’t stop himself before crashing into the closed off exit, muttering an “Aw man,” before colliding with the doors head first and falling abruptly to the floor a few feet away, landing on his butt.

        “We’re cut off from the street,” Aqualad grumbles, and you were all so close to freedom.

        “Thanks. My head hadn’t noticed,” Kid Flash says sarcastically while rubbing the back of his head from the impact with the floor.

        You came up from behind them, staring blankly at the doors, “Can’t we just break them down like before?” Superboy must have been thinking the same thing as he stepped forward, passing the fallen speedster and attempting to knock the door down with a punch. Though his fist didn’t seem to even leave a dent. He then tried to pry the door open, Aqualad even joining him but to no avail, it had been shut tight.

        Robin was below you, grumbling in annoyance as he typed rapidly into his holo-pad, “Can’t hack this fast enough,” then noticed a pair of Genomorphs reared around the corner, growling at the sight of you. He then sees a door to his right, “This way!”

        He kicked the door down and led the rest of you through the corridor but stopped when you saw the rest of the Genomorphs waiting for you, alongside Guardian. Each of them had a small G-Gnome resting on their shoulder. 

        You immediately summoned your spear as Aqualad formed a pair of dual swords out of his water bearers and took a fighting stance. 

        One of the G-Gnomes’ horns began to glow, then another, and another. Suddenly all of the G-Gnomes were glowing red like beacons, seemingly set off in a chain reaction. You felt a sharp pain in your head, an echoing mental rattling as you and your companions fell to the ground. You couldn’t make out the sounds outside the ones reverberating through your skull, leaning heavily onto the side of your polearm, breathing heavily and ragged in an attempt to stay upright as the rest of your companions lie limp on the floor. 

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

        Superboy had fallen to his knees after the G-Gnomes triggered this telepathic attack on him and his newfound friends. It was only when a voice echoed through his head, through his mind, that he felt the fog lifting somewhat, “Perhaps for the sake of all Genomorphs, our brother Superboy should make up his own mind.”

        Superboy looked up to see the Genomorph from the lab—Dubbilex—as he came to a realization as to where he heard this voice before, eyes widening, “It was you.”

        “Yes, brother,” he confirms. “I set the fire and lures your new friends to Cadmus, woke them when they were in danger—”

        “And guided me,” he finished for the older Genomorph, before questioning him and his motives. “Why?”

        “Because you are our hope,” Dubbilex relays to him. “The Genomorph hero. You will blaze a trail for all our brothers, showing us the way to freedom.”  He then glances at the dazed, slumped over form of Tide Caller, impressed by their mental fortitude being strong enough to keep conscious even under all of the pressure the G-Gnomes were putting on them and the other teens. Though it didn’t seem like they were able to focus on much else, “And for you to help to guide this displaced soul during their imminent travel into the unknown…”

        Suddenly, the G-Gnome perched on Guardian’s shoulder hopped off its spot, deactivating whatever control it had over the man. He groans, gripping his head in pain, “What’s going on..?” As Guardian gradually began to come to his senses, the sidekick trio and Tide Caller began to stir.

        “What is your choice, brother?” Asked Dubbilex, staring stoically at the young clone. Superboy for a moment looks down in contemplation, before lifting his head with a fire in his eyes.

“I. Choose. Freedom.”

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

        You groan as the weight over your mind lifts. Sluggishly lifting your head to see the Genomorphs now standing passively around you. The Genomorphs had ceased their hold over Guardian, you, and the sidekicks alike, “Feels like… a fog… lifting,” Guardian mutters, hand to his temple as he feels a newfound clarity forming in his mind. 

        Aqualad looks to the dazed hero, still a bit apprehensive of the man, “Guardian?”

Guardian had looked at them with a determined expression, and with conviction he told them, “Go. I’ll deal with Desmond.”

        A voice cuts through the air, “I think not,” as Dr. Desmond reveals himself, the Genomorphs parting their wall for him behind Guardian. In his hand he holds a strange blue vial. “Project Blockbuster will give me the power to restore order to Cadmus.” He declares, downing the mysterious glowing liquid, dropping the empty glass vial shortly after.

        He fell to his knees, head slumped into his arms, veins pulsating under his skin. His body rips through the fabric of his lab coat and undershirt. Robin and Kid Flash watch him undergo this horrific transformation. Desmond growls as he jerks his head up, the whites of his sclera turning into an ink black while his eyes turn a bright red. His skin tears into scraps as his body grows larger, stronger, the layer underneath such a grotesque display turned thick and gray.

        He rises from the ground with a guttural roar, scraps of skin and tufts of hair still clinging to his head and body. The thing standing in Dr. Desmond’s—Blockbuster’s— place turned to the group of heroes, breathing heavy. He sneered down at them with thick, sharpened teeth.

        Guardian puts his arm out towards you and the teens, defensively ordering, “Everyone back!” Before charging at the hulking goliath. You are greatly unamused to see Blockbuster sweep Guardian aside like he’s a mere toy, watching the golden helmed man fly into the wall a few feet away.

        Superboy was next to act, charging at the monster and striking him across the jaw. This however hardly affects him as he retaliates by punching Superboy downward, targeting his shoulder and upper back. Superboy turns and tries to hit him again, this time with an uppercut. He lands a few more hits, at one point being knocked back onto his shoulder before rolling back onto his feet, before Blockbuster reacts in turn by launching the boy as Superboy attempted to leap into the air to strike him by catching him and throwing him violently into the ceiling, following him up to the next floor shortly after.

        You all stare in disbelief at the massive hole the two had made, Robin being the first to make a comment on it, “Okay, that’s one way to bust through the ceiling.” He then pulled his grappling hook out and shot it through the opening the hole formed. 

        “You think Lab Coat planned that?” Kid Flash asked as he grabbed onto Robin in order for the shorter boy to propel them upwards. 

        “I doubt he’s planning anything anymore,” retorts Aqualad who crouches down in order to help give you a boost before following shortly after, jumping through the hole in the ceiling next.

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

        Above them was an expansive room with railings on the sides and upper stories in order to separate the two stories, the open hall lined with pillars acting as support beams. The four of you watched as Blockbuster made an attempt to restrain Superboy by pinning his arms to his sides, though it proves fruitless as Superboy manages to break his hold on him. Before he could take a swing at the gargantuan man, Blockbuster had grabbed a hold of Superboy’s ankle and flung him into the group you and the sidekicks had formed. Robin and Kid Flash managed to avoid getting hit by the body of their friend, you and Aqualad however weren’t as lucky as he came crashing into you.

        The yellow speedster dashes over to the entanglement of you, and the other boys, Robin following shortly after him in order for you to group up again. You pull yourself up using your spear as leverage while Kid Flash and Robin help Aqualad and Superboy back on their feet as Blockbuster starts to charge towards you.

        Kid Flash charges quickly at Blockbuster before needing to drop into  a slide underneath him as the goliath attempts to squash him. Though he still kept Blockbuster’s attention long enough for Superboy and Aqualad to perform a unison attack, landing two solid punches to Blockbuster’s face to knock him back and over as Kid Flash had crouched behind his legs in order to trip the monster, “Learned that one in Kindergarten,” he informs you smugly as Robin jumps over him, throwing two of his projectile disks (though the impact of this quip is lost on you as you instead chose to ponder what exactly a Kindergarten was… a garden of children?). 

        Blockbuster swings his arm, deflecting the two incoming projectiles before they could do any sort of damage aside from stagger him momentarily. He rolls only to see Superboy standing before him, making a gesture that led you to believe he was taunting him into wrestling. Blockbuster however is faster than the Kryptonian boy, grabbing him and shoving him forcefully into a nearby pillar, cracking it under the sheer force of his assault, though Superboy doesn’t seem to fazed by it as he continues to unleash a combo of punches to the hulking creature as it pulls away. That is until Blockbuster performed a cross strike that shattered the pillar behind Superboy due to the impact.

        He goes for a second strike but is interrupted by a water whip coiling around his arm, restraining him back. Aqualad pulls him forward, propelling himself up high enough to land a jab to Blockbuster’s face using his knee before landing on the remaining pillar above Superboy and turning his water bearers into a mace, readying it to swing. Blockbuster intercepts this single-handedly before tossing the Atlantean to the side as he holds Superboy down with the other. Aqualad lands on the floor with a pained cry, the floor beneath him cracking beneath the pressure while Blockbuster’s grip on Superboy grows tighter before flinging him violently  into a segment of another pillar near the second story of the building. The Kryptonian falls somewhat unconscious, his arm then buried beneath piles of debris from the breaking pillar.

        Kid Flash rushes in to help his friends as Aqualad manages to dodge Blockbuster's attempt at squashing his head with his foot. The yellow speedster had managed to grab a hold of the monster’s wrist and using his momentum he turned it to face back first towards Aqualad. It opens it’s fisted hand which allowed him to grab a hold of Kid Flash’s wrist when he lost his grip. Blockbuster then intercepts another one of Aqualad’s attacks by swinging Kid Flash like a sack of flour into the Atlantean. This sends each of them flying, Kid Flash sprawled against the ground by a different pillar while Aqualad slumps against the pillar from before. 

        Blockbuster comes in to deck him with an uppercut to the stomach that hits like a truck, destroying the remainder of the pillar before he then pins Aqualad to another pillar, his hand around his throat.

        You felt the building begin to shake as the pillar cracks where it’s seen joining the floor by one of the corners, blockbuster continuing this relentless assault while you and Robin watch from a safe distance away from the action. “Of course!” your shorter companion says in realization, activating his holo-pad to look at the floor plans of the room. Then calling out to Kid Flash who had been slowly recovering, “KF, get over here!”

        The speedster recovers his footing and zips over to the Boy Wonder as Aqualad changes his water bearers into a circular shield to defend himself from another uppercut from Blockbuster. As the monster stumbles on his feet, Superboy charges at him, targeting the area below his ribcage before jumping and hooking the goliath from behind in a chokehold. This enrages Blockbuster as he tosses Aqualad to the side in favor of trying to get the clone off of him before flinging him into the pillar again, destroying it.

        Robin had been showing something to you and Kid Flash, a simulation of sorts playing in real-time on the holographic screen, “Got it?” He asks, directing this query to the speedster who nods in confirmation, parroting the words before the Boy Wonder gives him a command, “Go!”

        You watch as Kid Flash dashes away, speeding to the right of Blockbuster to direct an attack at his face. When this doesn’t seem to faze him in the slightest save for tearing some of his stretched skin from his face, he dangles it tauntingly, “Got your nose!” 

        This manages to draw his attention from Superboy to begin targeting the talkative speedster, he barely misses him when he goes to strike him in two downward attacks. Before Superboy could get on his feet again to attack the beast, he’s called over by Robin, “Superboy, Aqualad!”

        Kid Flash continued to taunt the raging goliath as he came to a stop in front of one of the remaining pillars, shouting: “Come and get me you incredible bulk!” before zipping out of the way as Blockbuster lands a devastating punch to the pillar. Some of the debris had flown out and hit the speedster in the shoulder, which knocked him off his feet.

        He barely dodged another incoming attack from Blockbuster as Robin finished explaining his plan to You, Aqualad, and Superboy, “This one, and that one,” he says pointing to the remaining pillars he needs you three to destroy. The two of them gave him a nod of affirmation before charging back out. Robin takes out a few of his exploding disks to throw at his own targets, before turning to you momentarily, “You’ll be able to help Aqualad with that uh… Vision? Of yours? Th-the thing on your wrist.” You gave him a silent nod before joining the others.

        Superboy breaks his pillar with ease, landing a single blow to the base of the pillar while Aqualad forms his mace with his water bearers to destroy the second one, his tattoos glowing a bright electric blue. 

        Kid Flash dodges another attack from Blockbuster and moves to his right, tricking the creature into weakening another pillar, chuckling, “Sorry, try again,” before bolting away once again.

        Robin drew an X onto the floor with chalk as Aqualad used his water bearers to form a puddle on the ground. You helped him in creating the field by activating your Vision, water forming from your wrist and swirling up your arm before creating four missiles made up of water and launching them at the ground next to you. In the spots you targeted, small, semi-translucent whiskered serpents made of Hydro sprouted from the ground, looking at you as they awaited your orders. You crouched on the ground near them and then pointed to the X Robin had drawn, “See that X? I need you to target that spot specifically.” The four Hydro serpents gave a tiny nod before turning to shoot small bolts of Hydro at their intended target, adding to the puddle that Aqualad had been forming.

        Kid Flash skids through the puddle and obscures the X as Superboy jumps into the air, hitting Blockbuster hard enough to knock him to the ground landing straight on the target Robin laid out for him. Your Hydro mimics had dissipated by the time Aqualad channeled a current of electricity from his now glowing tattoos, channeling the crackling electro power from his hands and connecting it to the puddle formed beneath him that trailed all the way to the massive puddle Blockbuster currently resided on. Once he touches the water Blockbuster is immediately electrocuted.

        After stunning Blockbuster, Aqualad relinquished his hold on the current as Robin called for everyone to move out of the way, the three remaining pillars he had stuck his exploding disks which began blinking red and green rapidly and emitting a frequent beeping sound before they exploded. 

        This causes the building to collapse, the five of you barely avoiding the now caving in roof. Superboy managed to grab you and Kid Flash in an attempt to cover the two of you from the falling debris while Aqualad covered Robin as the whole building came crumbling down.

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

        For a moment there wasn’t a single sign of life beneath the rubble, that is until Superboy had punched a large potion of debris from over your group, tossing a slab of concrete somewhere to the side. You used your polearm as a crutch, leveraging yourself into a standing position, the others began to rise slowly, standing shakily next to you. Their clothes had been ripped and they all breathed heavily as the adrenalin escaped their bodies. 

        Aqualad came to his senses first, almost in disbelief at the events that had just occurred up to this point, “We… did it,” he pants.

        Robin was panting just as much, “Was there… ever any doubt?” He questions as he gives Kid Flash a high five, though both of them dropped it immediately as a sharp spike of pain shot through them due to the injuries they received during this whole adventure.

        Superboy had stepped out of the rubble, he looks to the incapacitated Blockbuster. You joined him momentarily, taking in the strange environment you seemed to be in. There were towering buildings in the far off vicinity near the destruction. They were tall, taller than the buildings of Liyue Harbor and the windmills of Mondstadt. They were more industrial looking as well, uniformed. The lack of notable details in their architecture made it hard to determine just where in Teyvat were you. Though a little nagging voice in the back of your mind told you that you were very much no longer in your homeland anymore.

        Kid Flash called out to Superboy, “See?” He says, drawing both his and your attention from where you were directed towards, jerking his thumb towards something in the sky. “The moon.”

        You both looked to the sky, Superboy stared in awe at the celestial body, taking it all in. He finally got to see it in person, to feel the moonlight and the breeze against his skin, no longer wondering what it felt like when he envisioned the image of the moon in his mind when educated by the G-Gnomes fed him mental pictures. To him it was mesmerizing.

        Meanwhile you were startled to find that (aside from the moon) you couldn’t make out a single constellation in the sky that you recognized. Missing were the familiar sights of Bestia Iustitia, Sinae Unicornis, Alatus Nemeseos, or Lapis Dei. Not even the sight of your own constellation. The stars held no meaning to you now, and the distance between you and your loved ones felt even more unsettling. Now that you were above ground you could feel the distinct lack of touch with the elements, surrounded by an unnatural amount of Geo and not enough Dendro to make it feel less jarring. 

        Before he could answer you, Superboy noticed something in the distance, something approaching from the sight of the moon. He squints at it, trying to decipher what he was seeing. It grows larger, the shape forming that of a man. He was donned head to toe in a bold blue, accented by a red cape flowing behind him. He bore a striking resemblance to the boy standing next to you. Kid Flash walked up to the other side of Superboy, “Oh, and Superman. Do we keep our promises or what?” Though he seemed just as surprised as the boy next to him.

        You squint at the man in the gradually closing distance, “Is that man… flying?” You wonder aloud, before then coming to a small (rather delayed) realization. “Wait… do you mean ‘Super’ as in… in relation to Superboy?”  This caused one of the other boys behind you (Robin you presumed) to let out a small laugh, though due to your current conditions it sounded more like a cough.

You activated your elemental sight, and it seems he was flying without the need to use Anemo (unlike a certain god you had met before).

        Suddenly, more figures began to form in the moonlight behind this… Superman. All of them unfamiliar to you, and all of them dressed in just as strange of outfits as your saviors. Many could fly without the need of Anemo—like Superman—though you noticed some of them needing to be lowered down on glowing green platforms created by some of the airborne heroes. They landed above you on the rubble before lowering their more grounded companions to the rubble below. Next to the now landed Superman was a man dressed like a bat wearing a dark suit and a cowl who flanked him on one side, to the other was a man in all red who appeared at an astonishing speed similar to the yellow speedster you’ve become acquainted with. 

        There was a moment of silence as these… heroes stared passively at the sidekicks, Superboy, and you. You could see a familiarity in their eyes when they scanned over the sidekicks, though it vanished when they landed on you. You straightened your back to stare as intensely in return, despite the soreness of your body screaming for you to just fall over and rest.

        You watched as Superman narrowed his eyes upon sighting Superboy who had begun to take a few steps forward, as if sizing him up and taking in the similarities the two had, almost suspiciously. The younger of the two then lifts the torn flap of his suit, showing the matching shield symbol on his chest with a small smile. Identical to the one that the older man wore across his broader chest.

        However that is where the similarities stopped as Superman’s expression went from one of disbelief, and almost as quickly turned into one of anger. You glared at this shift in tone as you began to shift closer to Superboy’s side, polearm still in hand as you began to take a protective stance alongside the now confused, almost disappointed expression of the clone.

        The man dressed as a bat—based on these naming schemes you guessed his title was something like “Batman” or something—was the next to speak up, though you didn’t take too kindly to the tone he used when he said, “Is that what I think it is?” While staring at the boy beside you.

        Kid Flash put a hand to the side of his mouth, as if trying to whisper, “He doesn’t like being called an ‘it’,” before Superboy suddenly rose to anger, his eyes hardened into steel as he announced firmly: “I’m Superman’s clone!”

        The heroes surrounding you, save for Batman and Superman, all seemed taken aback by this declaration. Batman redirected his gaze to Robin, and with a slight glare demanded him to, “Start talking.”

        As the three sidekicks were explaining the situation to their mentors, they remembered your presence, turning to you suddenly. You were tuned out of the conversation up to that point, too busy watching all of these strange people work on clearing damage and assessing the situation. Not a single one of them seemed to have any sort of elemental traces on their person, save for the blonde man speaking to Aqualad (you swore to the Archons and Celestia above if that man was simply dubbed “Aquaman” you would hurl yourself off the nearest mountain peak). 

        You felt a hand on your shoulder as you turned to face the group of sidekicks and adults. They all stared at you with inquisitive looks, Aqualad giving you a silent cue to introduce yourself. Sighing you looked the scowling Batman in the eyes, he seemed the most distrusting of you or your origins as you began to explain, “I am one known as Tide Caller, an… an adeptus from Liyue Harbor and former servant of the Geo Archon,” you were hoping this was explanation enough but none of the words you had just said seemed to spark any resemblance of recognition from the heroes who all glanced to each other in confusion.

        It was Robin who helped come to your rescue, “Tide Caller was there with us when we woke up in the pods in Cadmus, one of the scientists called them Project Riptide’.  They were about to be cloned as well, but Superboy got them out after coming back to rescue us.” 

        Kid Flash rubbed the back of his neck, “Yeah what Rob said, they don’t actually seem to be a clone of any sort like Supey’ here. Actually, they don’t really seem to be aware of what Cadmus is or how they ended up here at all.”

        You nodded, “I come from a land known as Teyvat, a place ruled by gods which harness the ability to control the elements under the eyes of Celestia, as well as provide mortals living within Teyvat the potential to achieve godhood by granting them the powers of one of seven elements via that of a vision, Teyvat is a dangerous place to traverse without any means to protect oneself, Visions are granted to those who are recognized by the gods and act as a conduit for whichever element resonates with a chosen allogene,”

You raise your wrist to show them your vision, still glowing to indicate the stored energy within the cerulean gemstone embedded into your wrist guard, small traces of Hydro rippling around your hand when called upon. “My Vision is that of Hydro, representing the divine ideal of justice. Alongside it are Visions are that of Anemo, representing the divine ideal of freedom, Geo representing contracts, Electro for eternity, Dendro for wisdom, Pyro for war, sometimes passion, and Cryo, which was once represented by the divine ideal of love… though, I have heard in more recent times that that ideal has changed since then.

        “I am accustomed to fighting monsters roaming my homeland, but when I had awakened we were faced with a horde of creatures I have never seen before. During our escape, Kid Flash and his companions attempted to question me as well, but none of the information they had managed to share before trouble stirred once again made any sense,” you then looked to the skies, observing the new star patterns littering the backdrop of the moon sadly. “The stars of this land are equally as unfamiliar to me. I cannot make sense of any of it, and I fear I am much farther from my home than I had anticipated.”

        The older heroes seemed to sympathize with you, however the more commandeering of the three continued to stare at you analytically, as if trying to suss out any falsehoods from your revelation, “What’s the last thing you can remember before waking up in Cadmus?” He presses.

        This caught you off guard, a slight headache forming from the start of your recollection. You’ve been wondering this since you had awoken, though distracted due to being thrown into the fray upon coming to your senses, so with a hand now pressed against your throbbing temple you relayed such information to them, “If I’m being honest I am… having some difficulties recalling such information. Though, the last thing I remember before waking here was… the feeling of falling. A-And feeling as if I had been dropped into a pool of ice water,” you looked up tiredly to the unwavering expression of the man in black. 

        He made some noise of acknowledgement after some moment of silence. During this moment of contemplation you took notice that Superboy’s attention was elsewhere, and following his gaze you saw the man in blue and you felt your eyes harden, much different from the former’s curious expression. He was speaking to a woman in a tiara and a warrior’s garb and a man dressed in black and blue (though the most striking thing about him was the fact that his skin was green). 

        The latter looked over his shoulder to see the inquisitive stare of Superboy and promptly put a shoulder on the other man’s shoulder, this caused Superman to meet the curious gaze of his clone. You watched them have a small exchange of averting their gaze before sheepishly looking back for a moment before the older Kryptonian began to approach the other. Superboy crossed his arms as the older male started to speak, “We’ll, uh, we’ll figure something out for you. The League will, I mean.” He manages to correct himself in what you took as him trying to distance himself from the situation. “For now I  better make sure they get the Blockbuster creature squared away.” 

        And with that he takes off into the night, following the two men who had created the platforms from before—the Green Lanterns, as you had overheard them be referred to as—had formed a sphere around Blockbusters still immobile body, while a silver man with red gloves and boots as well as two winged heroes with maces flew alongside them. He just flew off leaving the poor clone feeling hurt, confused, and abandoned.

        The sidekicks watch this exchange as well, though you aren’t sure if they feel the same bubbling anger as you from witnessing such a thing. Before you could make any biting comments directed to the departing figure, Batman draws all of your attention to him, “Cadmus wil be investigated,” he states. “All 52 levels, but let’s make one thing clear—”

        He’s interrupted by the Flash who pipes upo in a whine, “You should have called.”

You’re starting to realize where all of the younger speedster’s childish antics seemed to come from. 

        The Batman glared at his counterpart before growling, “End results aside, we’re not happy. You hacked Justice League systems, disobeyed direct orders, and endangered lives. You will not be doing this again.”

        The three of them looked down for a moment, before Aqualad spoke firmly, “I am sorry, but we will.” 

        His mentor attempts to commandeer him into silence, “Aqualad, stand down.”

        “Apologies, my King… But no.” Aqualad puts his hand to his chest in reverence to the older man—you are shocked at hearing such a title be directed to such a man—an action of which causes the blonde man to raise his brow as to question such an action.   He looks to his mentor—his ruler—before firmly stating his mind. “We did good work here tonight, the work you trained us to do. Together on our own we forged something powerful, important.”

        “If this is about your treatment at the Hall, the three of you—”

        “The four of us,” Kid Flash corrects, not hesitating to cut off his mentor. “And it’s not.”

        Robin had already taken a step forward, the next to speak his mind and step up against his mentor, “Batman, we’re ready to do what you taught us, or why teach us at all?” He’s the quietest out of the three, but his voice doesn’t waver.

        Superboy finally let his irritation bubble over, spitting out a curt, “Why let them tell us what to do?”

        You nodded, supportive of their cause, “Where I come from, the noblest of heroes do not wait for the gods to acknowledge them first in order to pave way to a better future. It is their ambition that will guide them to Celestia.”

        “It’s simple,” Superboy passes you, then the sidekicks, all of which stood proud and tall as they defied their mentors, “Get on board, or get out of the way.”

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

Mount Justice; July 8th, 8:04 EDT

        You watch as one of the Green Lanterns and Captain Atom fly around carrying large pieces of metal equipment around the inside of the hollowed out mountain you and the rest of your newfound team were within. Alongside you in the center base of the mountain’s interior were an assortment of heroes in addition to your team who were dressed in civilian clothes over the colorful getups they had worn when first meeting you. 

        Robin wore a black jacket over a hooded sweater and a pair of black running shoes in addition to a pair of “sunglasses” as they had told you they were called. 

        Kid Flash—or you should say Wally, after informing you of his secret identity a few days prior—was wearing a long sleeve shirt under an unbuttoned short sleeved button-up in addition to dark blue pants and running shoes. He kept a pair of goggles in his pocket.

        Aqualad—known as Kaldur’ahm—wore black sandals, black pants that were baggy enough to allow a comfortable room for the fins on the backs of his calves, and a two-toned blue and black jacket with a turtleneck style collar as to hide his gills. When you asked about his physiology he had informed you he was not in fact human, but rather Atlantean, which he described as a race of people who lived underwater and bore aquatic-type physiology due to their subversive nature, showing you the webs between his fingers and the shark like fins on his legs.

        Superboy donned a simple short sleeve top and fit him snugly, it was black with the signature red shield of him and his predecessor. In addition to this he wore a pair of dark pants and black combat boots.

        The boys had taken to explaining to you that they can’t be seen in their hero uniforms everywhere they went outside missions, so they took to their civvies (civilian clothes). Additionally they had to explain to you that the attire you’re used to seeing back in Teyvat is considered more “old-fashioned” or fantastical. 

        That being said, you still didn’t have much of a “modern” wardrobe outside your usual adventuring getup as they put it so you were still in your usual attire from the night they discovered you. They had been surprised at how well the fabrics of your clothes held up from all of the chaos that occurred at Cadmus. 

        “This cave was the original secret sanctuary of the Justice League,” Batman informs your team of heroes. “We’re calling it into service again. Since you five are determined to stay together and fight the good fight, you’ll do it on League terms.”

        All of you watched as he began to walk away from the center of the room, leaving the floor to the two other heroes standing by. “Red Tornado,” the red, metallic, being with a cape you were startled to discover lacking any organic signs of life to. “Volunteered to live here and be your supervisor. Black Canary,” the beautiful blonde woman in the black, one-piece bustier-leotard combination under a blue lapelled jacket. “Is in charge of training.” She also wore gray stockings with seams up the front and back, as well as black, heavy, calf-length boots, black fingerless gloves, and a black choker. 

        He had introduced them before swiftly bringing the attention back to himself, “I will deploy you on missions.”

        Robin seemed excited by this part of his exposition, “Real missions?” he inquires.

        “Yes, but covert.” Batman confirms.

        The Flash was next to speak up from behind Kid Flash’s shoulder, “The League will still handle the obvious stuff,” he then starts tapping the lightning bolt symbol on his chest. “That’s why we have these big targets on our chests.”

        Aquaman continues after him, “But Cadmus proves the bad guys are getting smarter. Batman needs a team that can operate on the sly,” he says before redirecting the conversation back to the stoic man in black.

        “The six of you will be that team.”

        Robin is the first to react, very excitedly going, “Cool!” Before catching the part of his mentor’s statement that felt off. “Wait, six?” 

        Instead of answering him, the Dark Knight simply looks over Robin’s shoulder as a new pair enter the room. You and the boys turn to see Martian Manhunter stepping from the shadows with a young teenage girl with green skin and a coppery red hair (the explanation that the reason the two were green was due to his origins as an outlander—as a Martian, took a bit longer for them to explain that you’d like to admit). “This is Martian Manhunter’s niece, Miss Martian.”

        She was a bit shy at first, giving them a small wave and a cute smile, you noticed she seemed to have a more human-like facial structure than her uncle. She greeted you all with a small yet nervous, “H-Hi.”

        You noticed how Kid Flash gives Robin a look as he puts his hand on his hip, the shorter male glancing up at him in turn, “Likin’ this gig more every minute,” he says with a small smirk before turning his attention back to the redheaded girl. “Uh, welcome aboard! I’m Kid Flash, that’s Robin,” the aforementioned boy gave her a little ‘rock on’ gesture with his hand (you only recognized it from your time with Xinyan who took the time in teaching you about the gesture she tends to make when performing). “Aqualad,” who gives her a silent nod in greeting. 

        “It’s cool if you forget their names.” He follows up nonchalantly.

        “I’m honored to be included,” she says with her hands clasped in front of her as the former sidekicks moved closer to greet her.

        You followed shortly behind them, raising a hand to your chest in a slight bow you had grown accustomed to doing when meeting new people back home, “And it is an honor to meet you as well, Miss Martian. I am Tide Caller, I hope our time together shall be memorable,” you state calmly. She seemed to fluster somewhat at your formality.

        You and Robin seemed to have come to a similar observation as you both had looked back to see Superboy standing off to the side by himself. Robin had taken the initiative however, noticing his downcast expression as he called out to him, “Hey Superboy! Come meet Miss M!” To which he complies.

        As he approaches, you watch as Miss Martian’s shirt seems to shift and warp into a new shape, changing from a solid white with a red X across her chest and a cape into a black t-shirt with the same red X, as if mirroring Superboy’s black top, “I like your t-shirt,” she admits albeit shyly.

        Superboy smiles softly which in turn causes Robin to nudge him in the chest with his elbow, a small smirk across his face. Kid Flash zips to the other side of him bearing a bright smile.

        Robin then looks to the Atlantean teen, both of them seemingly coming to a similar train of thought as Aqualad proudly states, “Today is the day.”

☆ ꧁ ═════════ ⋆✦⋆════════ ꧂ ☆

        While all of this occurred at Mount Justice, there was something stirring within Cadmus once more. 

        Below the currently under renovations Cadmus, “Cadmus changes today,” Guardian spoke directly to Dubbilex and Dr. Spence, the latter he turned to next, “Dr. Spence, you’re Acting Chief Scientist. No more G-Gnomes suppressing our wills, no more secret breeding projects. This is a kinder, gentler Cadmus.” He declares. 

        Dubbilex ensures to Guardian, announcing his his full support, “Then I will of course help in any way I can, brother.”

        Despite this promise to make a new and improved Cadmus, free of corruption and secrets galore, something sinister was brewing beneath the surface. 

        Guardian’s conversation was monitored by a group of unknown individuals, “Can the Light afford to leave Guardian without the G-Gnomes?” A masculine voice asks, the screens lined up as they all review the security footage currently playing this live feed.

        “We have subtler means of control,” another reassures. “What concerns me is the children. We now know the League is employing young Heroes to do their dirty work. Tch. That’s a dark twist.”

        “Yes, but one that can be played to our advantage,” a third, much deeper voice says.

        A scoff is heard, “You should be more worried of the loss of not only one, but two weapons,” A feminine voice chided. “You may be able to recover from the clone, but what about the Tide Caller? That was not an easy acquisition to make, their impromptu dive into this world was difficult to plan, how do you expect to get them back after such a blunder.”

        "Even the temporary loss of the weapon and the Tide Caller may prove useful,” reassures the last voice, before ending the exchange with finality. “Eventually, everyone sees the Light.”