#Answers: A Memoir

[readerviews]

"Answers: A Memoir" by Ava Sorin

Wise, Honest Answers from One Life Lived #books #bookreview #reading #readerviews

Answers: A Memoir Ava SorinIndependently Published (2023)ISBN:  979-8861334495Reviewed by Tammy Ruggles for Reader Views (02/2024) “Answers: A Memoir” by Ava Sorin could be the most motivating memoir you’ll read this year. Part of it is a slice-of-life take on the life experiences of the author, answering just over 50 questions posed by her niece Stacy. Both started out as single moms, so they…

[fortress-rising]

It's pride month! You know what that means

What do you want them to do? Shoot lavender bullets?

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

This might be a bit random but would you say you have any thoughts on Neurodivergent readings of Zhongli (more specifically autistic)? I was thinking about it in the latest chapter of JG amd even before then too. as an autistic person myself i feel he reads very heavily as such, especially when talking about his human mask and feeling like he doesn't need to force it as much with childe, and his issues with human expression in smiling etc. but I think it's then an interesting debate between that and the fact that, well, he's just not human. that all comes from a place of being an entirely different species, unevolved and unrelated to human brains and how they think and read social patterns, and I feel we don't really have any way of telling if ZL has any divergent tendencies among dragons right? and even then he's half, too, so that affects things.

anyway sorry for the ramble I was mainly wondering if you had any opinions on the matter, or if you intended the parallels I definitely see while reading your Zhongli! love your work as always <3333

i think i might've commented on this at some point but never directly, so here – i do have thoughts on the matter!

as you mentioned, it's difficult to tell with characters that aren't human, because you can't call something 'neurodivergent' if the bases for their neurotypical-ity are not the ones by which we measure this stuff. so, to me, ALL non-human characters are neurodivergent-coded. they may not be neurodivergent, technically speaking (like how you mentioned, maybe all dragons are just like zl), but to us, they read as such. so, coded. ultimately i do think there is merit in labeling them as neurodivergent because, even if they, again, technically aren't; we are going to run into problems if we attempt to treat them as neurotypical, so we might as well say yeah, neurodivergent. it is also kinda correct anyway – they do diverge from us. that's a fact. it's like saying dogs are colorblind. if all dogs see in the same range, then you can't say your dog in specific is colorblind (unless it actually is but that's beside the point); but compared to us, from our perspective, for what it matters to us and how that will translate into how we treat them then yes! dogs are colorblind! i think i mentioned it once in conjunction with characters like alhaitham. to me, zhongli is neurodivergent-coded, while alhaitham is neurodivergent straight-up. because (as far as we know) he's human, so his brain should, in theory, be like ours.

as for which flavor of neurodivergency zl is coded to have in specific i would agree with you on autism! but then again, i'm not an expert on these things, i don't know the exact ins and outs and the specific characteristics that constitute an autistic character – i just write them the way i perceive them, with the quirks i perceive them to have. not to get preachy but i think that's the better way to write characters in general, since that's how real people work, after all. people with autism aren't born fitting some parameters that will make them autistic – they're born with specific quirks that we then interpret as autism, and even then you don't necessarily get two people having the exact same experience with this. most of these terms are umbrella terms regardless as to how well-defined or how big or small the umbrella is.

so yeah!

[alkalische]

What are your honest thoughts on Ines

I love Ines. I genuinely really love all three ofthe Darknights trio, and I love how well they balance each other out, and every time they appear on screen together i kick my feet and giggle

The thing about Ines is that unfortunately she doenst get a clear defined character arc in any of the stories she appears in. Which is a fucking shame, because Ines STEALS the show in every scene she's in- she's genuinely really fucking funny because she's a beautiful woman that speaks and acts like a grizzled old war vet

Her character concept is really strong- you get a sheep pretending to be sarkaz, and she IS more sarkaz than a lot of other sarkaz. And she gets zero fucking development in the main story!

The writing issue here is that Ines starts out as Hoederer's right hand woman and like. By the end of the victoria she is still trapped in her status quo.

In Darknights Memoir, she plays a supporting role to W's protagonist and Hoederer's deuteragonist (let's be real ines was not a main character in that one, UNFORTUNATELY).

Her character arc was her DISOBEYING Hoederer at the end. Because of W coming into her life.

Like when you write characters you want them going from Point A to Point B. Ines Has this in Darknights Memoir (Listening to whatever Hoederer says ---> Directly going against Hoederer and having like. Actual Agency), and then proceeds to sit back in Point A for the entirety of the victoria arc.

And it's really not fair because Hoederer and W get absolutely fantastic and insane development.

Ines didn't even have a character arc in the chapter 12, where she featured in the banner. She had cool moments, and no development. The writers like. Don't really give a shit about her.

That's why we joke a lot about wanting Ines to finally pass the Bechdel test because her entire characterisation is about following a man and her only development she truly gets is no longer following said man.

I love the hoederer and ines dynamic so much but holy shit ines genuinely needs to have something of her own. i do not think they're gonna give us ines development in the year of our lord 2025 because at this point all the writers have done with her is bench her at best and use her for quick shippy tropes with Hoederer.

the big majority fanbase doesn't give a shit about ines which leads to all the "Darknights nuclear family" takes (which are poopoo dogshit). and they can't name one fucking instance where Ines was the mom figure because the average dudebro sees a beautiful woman and projects mom roles onto her.

i'm really glad that Hoederer is helping her set up a store, though. And take notice that he calls it "her store" and not "our store" because he's said before that she's running it and it's mostly not his business. (shoutout to hoederer for letting women have a shred of agency #feminism)

[writers-in-moominvalley]

Do you think it would be better (from a story telling perspective), if in Moominpappa's Memoirs, for Moominpapa to be the one who stumbled upon an astrology newspaper/book and find out that he was born under "special stars", or if the Hemulen actually was into astrology.

When I first read The Exploits of Moominpappa, I was actually a bit weary if the Hemulen was the one who was into astrology.

It just didn't seem in character for her. I know we picture astrology differently than people did when this book was written, so I know now it astrology is seen as rather feminine and "fake", and I don't know if it had the same connotations as it did back then as it did now.

It didn't make sense that a strict Hemulen would care or put stock into something like astrology. But, then again, it was seen in a different light, then maybe she could have viewed it as the stars (something Big and Important and has Authority) giving advice, in a way, about how a child will behave.

And from a storytelling perspective, I think it could be really interesting for the Hemulen to tell Moominpapa that he is "special", as it would have been the only time in the Home where he was told that, and it's possible that Papa could have felt inspired to hear the Hemulen call him "special" again, which is why he thinks of her so often throughout the book.

But I think it also could be interesting for Moominpapa to find the astrology book himself and find out on his own that he was born under "special stars". It showcases how Moominpapa yearns to be special, and could even place the idea that he is special in his head in the first place.

It also feels more isolating, Moominpapa finding out this information on his own and being the only one to believe it, instead of being told by someone else, further sells the idea that Moominpapa was very isolated in the home.

Idk, it was just something I thought about. I really like how unreliable of a narrative Moominpapa can be in his memoirs. While reading them I found myself pausing a lot and wondering if that's how something really went down, or if Moominpapa changed it.

See, the thing with Moominpappa's Memoirs is that it really is an unreliable narrative, but I want to think that every horrible emotion Moominpappa wrote that he felt was real to him atleast.

Maybe the Hemulen really was as abusive and neglectful as he made her sound! It would explain much his behavior, as people with self-aggrandizing disorders like NPD tend to develop them as a coping mechanism for low self-esteem stemming from such abuse. Or she might not have been as bad as he said! Maybe it was a lie to make himself seem more pitiful and endearing to his readers, truly an artist who suffered and bested his circumstances. Moominpappa has admitted himself to be unreliable from the preface, so we're the only ones who gets to choose what truth to believe - and I choose to believe Moominpappa when he says he was verbally abused and isolated and self-pitying, because it makes the most sense for his behavior and he may even take pride in having such a sad backstory, characterization in adaptations be damned.

And with that, I think it would be strange for Moominpappa to lie about his principal having an interest in astrology when he discovered such a thing himself, because what is the goal of displacing the credit in this case? If he discovered astrology by himself it would've further painted him as the gifted child genius he claims to be!

Astrology was sort of a niche thing that slowly gained popularity in Tove's time, and it's always been a pretentious thing atleast in the modern era. Moominpappa is as much of a reflection of Tove as he is of her father, Viktor, and that's why Moominpappa shares the same birthday as her. As a creative person I can imagine Tove giggling to himself writing a character being pompous of his (and her own) star sign because it's silly and almost cute, just like alot of the other things her characters believe and do. But also Tove has a great knack for (ironically) humanizing her characters through small details.

The Hemulen being interested in astrology is a small silly thing that may not be entirely relevant to the story and could've easily been a discovery handed to Moominpappa, but so is Hodgkins using a net his nephew made for his birthday even though there's no fish in the river because he doesn't want his nephew to feel like he made him something useless, so is Joxter and Muddler sharing sweets during the Autocrat's party. Moominpappa is a great storyteller and Tove is an even better writer in this regard - it adds a realism to the warped reality Moominpappa presents to us, an impression of a reality that's beyond Moominpappa and he only has a glimpse of.

We don't know about anyone else's backstory besides a few vague lines because Moominpappa is never interested in them, only his own, this story is about him and he's said himself that he's become incurious about anything (or anyone) but himself. The Hemulen's interest in astrology humanizes her in ways we don't fully register, she isn't an abusive character with no inner world who only serves Moominpappa's character, but all he can do is provide an impression of her through faded memories, and it's honestly more realistic that she'd be capable of saying something that could be seen as a great compliment to Moominpappa.

In fact, it could be that him being called special once in an early childhood memory is the thing that made him latch onto the label, because it's the only explanation he likes for why he seems so isolated from his peers. He's not Weird, he's Special! The Hemulen told him so! And she must be right about that and nothing else.

And it breaks my heart everytime to think about it.

[socialitesleuth]

When did you meet the Tracys?

I cannot tell you the exact date, Anon, nor the exact year. All I can tell you is that I was quite young and, as it so usually goes when meeting someone for the first time as a child, I was unaware at the time how important a meeting it would come to be.

If my memory serves me correctly, I believe the first meeting was at the manor. Jeff had brought the boys over when he came to see my father - what that meeting was about, I'm afraid I have no idea. The boys, at this point in time, were the eldest three, of course. I do remember watching them alight from their vehicle from my bedroom window. I was intrigued by their presence; I'd known my father had a meeting that afternoon but I had not been made aware that we'd also be entertaining three boys who were close to my own age.

Scott was boisterous. He was bright blue eyes and tiny dimples when he smiled. I remember being... not intimidated but slightly unnerved by his confidence. He got it all from Jeff, of course. I could tell he loved his father fiercely. It was admirable but it put me on edge. We were both the eldest siblings, and we both often vied to be the leader in any given game we were playing which occasionally put us at logger heads, but I don't think we ever truly fell out. It's hard to stay mad at any of the Tracys.

Virgil was the opposite of Scott in so many ways. His eyes were darker, his height was shorter, his confidence was less pronounced. He held a toy firefighter in his left hand. I remember it because he refused to let me see it when I'd asked. He'd gripped it tighter, hiding it behind his back as he shook his head. I can't recall his exact words but I believe they were something along the lines of "I can't let you see Kip. He's on call and he might be needed at a moment's notice." Whenever Virgil came for a visit, especially as he grew older, he would eye up my great-grandmother's Baby Grand. He'd stare at it longingly each and every time he was at the manor until my mother asked if he'd like to play it one day. This was some years later, I must confess, but I have to tell you that hearing Virgil playing the piano is one of the most beautiful things you'll ever hear.

Lastly, there was John. Much like Virgil, John was different to his older brothers. His bright hair stood him out in all the ways he hated, and he hung back, always two steps behind his brothers. His was inquisitive; I remember noticing how those vivid, teal eyes scrutinised the portraits that lined the hallway and how he examined every detail of our home. I remember because I spoke to him before dinner. John has never been much of a talker when it comes to strangers, but I could understand. Even as a child, John was knowledgable. Though we grew closer during our time at Oxford, that first bond was formed that night.

[lunavagans]

what book does everyone right now need to read?

Okay, whenever I get asked for book recommendations, the first one I name is the Memoirs of Lady Trent - A natural history of dragons. It‘s a five-book fantasy series and it‘s amazing.

One point that I love about it is the queer rep, which, as it‘s not the main point, isn‘t abundant, but made clear when it‘s there and not only restricted to minor characters, and above all: it‘s casual. It‘s not a big deal. People just are queer. The protagonist is canonically genderqueer; as she can‘t be bothered with an introspective in her gender identity beyond what‘s been prescribed for her by the society she grew in (mood tbh), this doesn‘t come up a lot, though. Maybe once in the third book? Another character that enters the cast in the second book and becomes vital to the plot is canonically aroace, which is talked about once and then accepted. Because why wouldn‘t it be?

While we‘re on the topic of characters, they‘re shown in such a realistic and just human way?? The protagonist becomes a single mother in book two and struggles so hard with it, even admitting to not liking her son all that much during this period, while giving reasons for this that both explain why she doesn‘t and show that she does in fact try her best to mitigate this with the resources a twenty-something widow has in what‘s basically 18th century England. She‘s not perfect. Nobody is. But the reader gets to know her so well during these books that they can at least understand where she comes from. (Also the son eventually joins the adventures and I usually really don’t like children in books but I’m sold on him! Like I love him!!) Also, the funny commentary from her in the future, as the „writer“ of these books sheds a lot of light on some past decisions of hers that were decidedly stupid, as well as the clear discussion of prejudices that she had that she was able to reflect on.

Another thing: the worldbuilding. It‘s basically the 18th/19th century, but with differently named countries and dragons. And while it‘s technically fantasy, it doesn‘t feel like it at all, because technology and science is pretty much kept the same as in our world! Even the dragons are just endangered animals that are only just starting to be looked into, now that stigmata are being contradicted by field observations. Different environments (both natural and political) and cultures have real-world equivalents, but none are depicted in a way that feels ‚for the sake of exotic adventures‘. Every single culture has members that are active in the adventures of the protagonist, that have their own motives and wishes, and each culture has its own relationship with each other. Racism is depicted, but it‘s pretty clear that the idea behind it is nonsensical at best and dehumanizing at worst. Also „period“-typical colonial politics, though only in the background.

Also the plot, of course. So each book features one adventure, all leading up to the grand discovery of the century. Because the books are written in a memoir-style, the reader knows from pretty much page one what that discovery is, but also that in the beginning, it seems impossible to archieve it. The plot is more about finding out how they made this discovery and fulfill their initial goal. What I mean is that the grand scheme is clear, but the small scheme isn‘t at all, and that made at least for me an incredibly satisfying read.

Small spoilers ahead in this paragraph: The conflict driving the plot is basically that the dragons get harvested and are thus on the verge of going extinct, and the protagonist and her companions try to find a solution to this. It‘s so good??? And so unique and believable because shit, that would happen today, wouldn‘t it!! And it has happened!! Rhinoceros and elephants are prominent examples for this, and tigers or lions for trophy hunting (also featured in the books). Real world fuckery in a realistic manner.

(Don‘t just go into the series for the dragons, though. There‘s so much more than dragons. Also, there‘s explicit description of animals being butchered and stuff - with sketches! Very good ones, actually. All that to say, it doesn‘t insist on grim gore, but it doesn‘t shy away when it makes sense to go into detail, either. Same with diseases, periods and injuries. Watch out for that.)

Also, just look at the covers. Look at them. Google the series and look at them. (Actually don‘t, this post has some flat ones.)

[two-entire-bits]

finished reading an essay by a person in my peer view group and I think I took psychic damage.

[briebysabs]

Congrats!! I like your analysises(?) and I've been meaning to ask you this for a while, but what do you think this panel means?

Thank you for your question!! This is actually my favorite Astolfo panel and this chapter in general is brilliant actually. I’d love to talk about it in depth sometime soon. My interpretation of this panel was Astolfo’s self-hatred manifesting into a very striking image. In chapter 58, we see Astolfo attempt sui@ide because he blames himself dearly for the massacre of his family.

So this panel shows how he wishes he died that day. It’s also interesting that his head is being sliced by Roland’s blade instead of a picture of him dead under a group of vampires. This seems intentional and could mean he finds himself undeserving of Roland. Undeserving of salvation because Astolfo is under the impression at this point that Roland has abandoned him. His God has left him so he should’ve died like the vampire boy Roland slayed in saving his life. Since to Astolfo he is just as guilty.

Finally the words themselves “Who do we kill next?” is showing Astolfo’s spiral into self-destruction. As killing is what gives his life purpose now. Paladins killed the vampire boy’s family so the boy killed Astolfo’s family. Now Astolfo is continuing the cycle of violence and he knows this but breaking it means forgiving himself.

Something he cannot find the strength to do.

[esarkaye]

"More tears are shed over answered prayers than unanswered ones."

—Saint Teresa

[kindercelery]

what got you into English history in particular? :0

ITS HIS FAULT UR HONORRRR

But basically, I used to be super into the Tudor Era (but that was like 3 or something years ago), and then I got bored of it so I went onto fashion history, then of course dinosaurs and the French Revolution. But I was always hearing something about Horrible Histories and I thought it was just some weird book or magazine until I saw the Charles II song on my YT FYP and listened to it- then the Richard III and George IV song, and at the time I had thought the Who Was Show was the best history show out there but to this day I stand corrected (but I still love the Who Was Show so much omg). So basically the Charles II rap was a canon event of sorts.

[meyhew]

well thanks for finally making it clear that you don’t care or believe what happened to maya. she has addressed people saying it’s fiction and whatnot multiple times already. yall are doing most typical victim blamey shit questioning the way she did things like do u hear yourselves?

and a grown man getting with a 17 year old then lying about her being 18 to save face is a lot more than just “kind of weird” but everyone’s ignoring that part.

i didn’t say it’s fiction. maya did. and i’m not saying nothing happened to her. i’m saying We Don’t Know which parts of that book are true to life and which have been exaggerated. she was a kid at 17 but she’s not a kid now and she has unlimited resources at her disposal. where are the adults in her life to guide her? where are her parents telling her if she says her book is fiction and only parts of it are based on things that happened to her, people won’t know which parts those are? i know about her at home abortion because she spoke about that but i don’t know anything else that’s true because, again, SHE said her book is fiction. that is not on me or anyone else. no one is ignoring anything, you’ve just hated liam long before he had anything to do with maya

[roses-of-the-romanovs]

What’s your absolute FAVORITE tiny/little known fun fact about one of the daughters? Mine is that Anastasia saw Rasputin in her dreams because I also see him in mine!

Hi! I can't tell if it's creepy or cool that you see Rasputin in your dreams! I love that Anastasia tried jumping up and down on one foot in order to grow taller. I love all stories about little Nastasia 😊

I have just finished a lesson with Olga Nicolaievna; by myself again, I am expecting her sister Tatiana. The door opens and instead I see a very small girl coming towards me. She is carrying under her arm a big picture-book, which she ceremoniously put down on the table in front of me; then she gives me her hand and says in Russian: "I would like to learn French too." And without waiting for my answer, she climbs on to a chair, kneels on it, opens her book, and asks me, putting her tiny forefinger on a huge elephant: "What's this called in French?" Then I am confronted with a whole succession of lions, tigers, and well, almost all the creatures in the Ark. I join her in the game, very pleased with her great seriousness about this first lesson. Then the door opens again, and this time Tatiana comes in. The little girl, whose finger has just lighted on the boaconstrictor, claps the picture-book shut and jumps up. She holds out her hand to me once more, and in a very low voice says: "I'll come again tomorrow." Then she runs out of the room, clasping the book to her chest.

This was how I first made the acquaintance of Anastasia Nicolaievna, who was then four and a half. I need hardly say that no lesson took place on the next day. —Gilliard

I had got from England a preparation for the children’s hair, and was rubbing it into little Anastasie’s head one evening. She objected, and I said, “It will make your hair grow nicely, darling,” so she submitted. Next evening I went to get the kappuka from the cupboard, and mademoiselle ran off into the next room. She returned dragging by its leg an awful dolly, a regular fetish, minus a wig, one eye, and an arm. She gravely took a little piece of sponge and began to rub the kappuka into the creature’s head. I remonstrated, telling her I had to send to England for the stuff and did not want it wasted. She looked at me most reproachfully, and said, “My poor Vera! she has got no curls; this will make her hair grow.” Of course, she got her way. —Eagar

[socialitesleuth]

Given that the Tracy boys seem to like to share photographs and memories from their own childhoods, anything from the graceful raising of little Lady Penelope to share

When I was younger, my parents tried to keep my away from the spotlight as much as possible. They did everything in their power to make sure I had as "normal" a childhood as I could have had, given the circumstances.

Because of this, we often spent our weekends occupying our time with low-key activities closer to home or on retreats and resorts that were behind locked gates. Some might argue that this was still far from a "normal" childhood, and perhaps there is room for debate here, but I shan't be getting into any of that.

I quickly developed a love for the outdoors. With most of our family trips consisting of outings to various parks across the nation, and then later abroad, it's not hard to see why.

It may shock the world (or maybe it won't) to know that I enjoyed (and still do when situations allow me to) running around muddy fields in Wellington boots and dungarees just as much as I do dressing in my glimmering frocks.

[horrororman]

📼 Notable films that were released on February 28th & 29th...

#TheMonsterandtheGirl (1941).

#DrTerrorsHouseofHorrors (1965)(US).

#ChildrenShouldntPlaywithDeadThings (1973)(Los Angeles, California).

#DontAnswerthePhone! (February 29, 1980).

#House (1986)(US).

#TheGateII: Trespassers aka Gate II: Return to the Nightmare (1992)(US).

#MemoirsofanInvisibleMan (1992).

#TromeoandJuliet (1997)(US).

#horror

[foreverinthepagesofhistoryy]

fav fact about Elisabeth of Hesse?

Hi anon! My favorite “facts” about Ella are the mentions of her and her cousins in Margaretta Edgar’s book “Six Years At The Russian Court”. These might not be specific facts but they definitely are something about Ella’s personality that I love. Because of her short life, there wasn’t much time to observe Ella so any memoir that mentions her amazing personality is so special.

“My children were delighted to see their cousin Ella once more. This dear child was then between eight and nine years old, and very like her beautiful mother in appearance. But the child's eyes had ever a look of fate in them. Looking at her I used to wonder what those wide grey-blue eyes saw, to bring such a look of sadness to the childish face.”

“In spite of this look of intense sadness in her eyes the little Princess herself was full of life and happiness. I never saw so sunny a nature; never saw the child out of temper, nor cross, and should any little dispute arise amongst my four charges, she would settle it with perfect amiability and justice, making whoever was the most in the wrong give in, and reproving with great gentleness the others. Where Princess Ella was, no angry disputes could exist. She was so sweet and just that the other children always gave in to her arbitration. Looking back on her short life often wonder why we did not see that she was quite too good for this world, her fit companions were the angels. She was a regular little mother, and was never so happy as with the ‘tiny cousin’, as she called Anastasie.”

“She always enjoyed life so much, and she ran and bicycled about the gloomy old park, took the lead in all the games and was like a sunbeam; yet all the time she was stricken with mortal illness, though none suspected it.”

“One day she and Tatiana were wonderfully busy and mysterious, running in and out of the rooms, and exploding into laughter every now and then. In the evening after they were in bed Tatiana took from under her pillow a little box which dear cousin Ella had prepared for her. This contained some little coloured stones which they had picked out of the gravel the day before, some bits of matches, luminous ends, of course, the sand-paper off a matchbox and some tissue paper. This was a toy which they had prepared. After Tatiana was in bed, if she felt lonely she was to sit up in bed, light a match upon the sand-paper, set fire to the tissue paper, and by its light to play with the stones. Well, of course, that could not be allowed, and the poor little Princess was overwhelmed when I explained to her that they might all have been burned in their beds.”

“The little Princess was full of life and fun. never remember to have seen her in higher spirits than she was on Saturday evening. She prepared and carried out an innocent little practical joke on her father and the Empress. She asked me to put her three eldest cousins in her bed, and leave little Anastasie alone in her bedroom. "When auntie Alix and papa come, said the child, "auntie Alix will be looking everywhere for her children, and papa will not know how he has got four." Accordingly it was done, and I stepped into the corridor to ask the Empress and the Grand Duke to be very much surprised. They were, of course, exceedingly surprised, and the Empress pretended to be much frightened, to the child's great delight. You could hear her laughter all through the house, as one by one the cousins were disclosed.”

She was a beautiful and unique soul who will be missed forever! Happy belated birthday dear Ella! 💜

Thank you for asking!